Amen, Amen, Amen: Memoir of a Girl Who Couldn't Stop Praying (Among Other Things)
4/5
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About this audiobook
In college, Abby is diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder, and while it helps explain the counting and kissing and collecting, she resists rationalizing her deepest obsession, certain that her prayers are not an illness but the cure. Unable to confront the fears that drive her, she descends into darker compulsions, cutting and starving herself, measuring every calorie and each incision. But even in the darkest moments of her illness, there are glimmers of laughter and hope, for she carries the irrepressible spirit and passion that are so much a part of her family. Ultimately, it is another loss-the death of her mother-that compels Abby to redefine the terms of her illness and her faith, freeing her to live and love more fully.
Full of heartbreak, buoyant with humor, and marked by exceptionally vivid storytelling, Amen, Amen, Amen is a brilliant account of soul-searching, self-discovery, and the bounds and boundlessness of obsession and devotion.
Abby Sher
Abby Sher is a writer and performer whose work has appeared in The New York Times, The New Yorker, The Washington Post, The Los Angeles Times, Self, Jane, Elle, and more. She is also the author of All the Ways the World Can End (Farrar Straus Giroux Books for Young Readers), Breaking Free: True Stories of Girls Who Escaped Modern Slavery, Amen, Amen, Amen: Memoir of a Girl Who Couldn't Stop Praying, and Kissing Snowflakes. One of her essays has recently been optioned by Amazon for a television series. Abby has written and performed for The Second City, Upright Citizen's Brigade, HBO and NPR. She is currently a co-producer of the Chucklepatch Comedy Show and she lives in New Jersey with her family.
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Reviews for Amen, Amen, Amen
29 ratings7 reviews
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A very intimate and captivating memoir about growing up with extremely intense OCD. Abby Sher has been dealing with it her whole life, but when her father dies, she becomes obsessed with the idea that she some how caused his death. Thus begins a series of atoning habits that slowly expand to consume her life. Walk with her as she confesses her most secret fears, nightmares, and hopes. A very personal examination of the disease and how it affects a life.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Sher's book is a moving account of living in the day to day with OCD. She picks up on all the little things, like having to stop and pick up trash off the sidewalk for fear of what would happen if she did not. It's details like these that make you realize how all-consuming her disorder is. And that's what Sher does throughout the course of her narrative: with example piled upon on example, she draws you deeper into the world of what it's like to live with an all-pervasive disorder. The sheer volume of detail (an extension of the OCD itself?) really brings the disorder into light.Yet Sher glosses over things, like her time with the comedy troupe, that might have proven interesting. Yes, it's a memoir about OCD, but it's also a memoir about her life, and it seems a shame that parts of her life get so little treatment. There were some blanks I would have liked to have seen filled in. As I said, it's like the sheer volume of detail about OCD is like a symptom of the OCD itself, and all the other details of life get burned away by the disease, and the reader is left the poorer for it.Some have found the book self-indulgent. Is it? Maybe at times, yes. I find that hard to comment on in a narrative about mental illness. I keep coming back to the point that part of what Sher is trying to demonstrate is how all-consuming this illness is, and it could be, to some readers, that this comes off as self-centered. But I think that is ultimately a misreading.Sher also does a good job outlining the dynamics of an incredibly complex family and her complex relationship to religion. It's impressive that she managed to squeeze this in there with as much time as she spends talking about the illness, but these are an inextricably intertwined, and she does a good job drawing out the links between the various aspects of these things.Overall, a moving memoir. I wish it had ended on a stronger note, even though I realize that there can't be any real "wrapping up" of an ongoing illness.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I am a literary voyeur, I love to look at others' lives, so I thought this “memoir of a girl who couldn't stop praying (among other things)” would be right up my alley. In some ways it was, in others – not so much.Abby has had much too much loss in her life, beginning when she was most vulnerable, as a child. Her OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder) began manifesting itself before the losses but was greatly exacerbated when someone close to her died. She began to feel she was responsible for countless deaths and she had to find ways to ward off the deaths she was causing. Lots of rituals, hours of compulsive prayer, and ridding the world of anything dangerous.That last part meant picking up trash, stray paperclips that could puncture a tire causing a blowout and death for an entire family, pieces of glass, sharp metal, even leaves with sharp, pointy stems. If she let down her guard or didn't pray enough or if she let down G-d (she couldn't write “God” for reasons she explained), catastrophe was sure to follow. Her religion seemed more of a superstition than faith.I know that repetition is a huge part of OCD, but the reader shouldn't have to suffer the same fate. A good part of the first half of the book involved countless recollections of imaginary deaths and molestations she caused. Abby even quit a job working with children because she convinced herself she was molesting them. She would circle a block numerous times, looking for the person she thought she mowed down on the previous lap. Very sad, but the repetition got old.The second half of the book was more interesting, but also frustrating to me in some ways. Memoirs are supposed to be about the person writing the book, all fair and good. But Abby was so involved with her illness that she seemed to have very little insight into the people around her. I didn't find the empathy I expected. That doesn't mean that Abby doesn't feel it, but it didn't come across in the book.In my opinion, the book has some flaws, but I did find it interesting. Abby has worked hardto overcome her OCD and I wish her the very best. She provided a copy of this book to me and I thank her.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Something like Abby Sher's Amen, Amen, Amen. As a young girl Sher starts collecting trash, repeating phrases and songs, ritually kissing her father's pictures until it wears away, and imagining horrific accidents of which she was the cause. In high school she's begins praying and it soon becomes hours daily. In college she starts to violently exercise and starve herself to the point of anorexia. Everything culminates in self mutilation. The story is interspersed with Sher's phrases, prayers and songs.This memoir begins when the author, Abby Sher, is about 10. She recounts the first part of the story through the eyes of a child, so much so that it reads like juvenile literature. Specifically I was reminded of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day as the "the noodles were hard on the ends like dry rubber cement, and the salad was more brown then green, sloshing in a small pond of Italian Dressing." I do not know enough about OCD to comment on if this imaginative, Debbie-Downer type thinking is symptomatic of the disorder. If so, Sher is to be commended for such a vivid portrayal. But as a reader it is tedious to labor through because the narration never ages up, and the complaining goes on and on.I picked up the book with the expectation to be captivated with the strange allure of an episode of Hoarders. Instead I found myself frustrated with the Sher's insane and immature rationales. Irritated by her severe delusions of importance. And repelled by her thoroughly detailed descriptions of cutting. I really struggled to finish this one. At its conclusion, I can concede that Sher had some serious problems and found her compulsions terrible, but I don't feel like I've come away with any better understanding of what caused her disorder, or that any of her compulsions were much resolved. The book only really finds traction as Sher details her life's relationships. One can't help sympathize with her mother, friends and boyfriends as Sher claims devotion and resentment in back to back sentences. They emerge as saints who patiently struggle with trying to accommodate Sher. These complex relationships comprise the redeeming pages in the otherwise indulgent and long-winded book.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A fascinating autobiography of a person truly suffering from OCD. In this day and age when so many people throw that term around loosely, the account of OCD in this book was a real eye-opener for me.The title comes from the author's main form of OCD, which she calls "quiet time" -- an obsessive need to pray for others. This blooms into a need to save others from death (provoked by the deaths, during her childhood, of a beloved aunt and her father) and involves praying after ambulances and picking up pieces of trash that might be able to harm others in even the slightest way, such as paper clips and tiny pieces of glass. As she deals with the pressures of adulthood, she adds anorexia, cutting, and pounding to her repertoire of obsessions.This book seems tragic and horrible in some ways, but I found it fascinating and compelling. The author is an excellent writer and it was actually a very quick read although it is a sizeable book. Plus, there is redemption at the end, and although it is not exactly a "happy ending," it is a hopeful ending, and very touching. I recommend this book highly to anyone, and especially those who may be coping with (or know someone who is coping with) the behaviors listed.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Sher's book is a moving account of living in the day to day with OCD. She picks up on all the little things, like having to stop and pick up trash off the sidewalk for fear of what would happen if she did not. It's details like these that make you realize how all-consuming her disorder is. And that's what Sher does throughout the course of her narrative: with example piled upon on example, she draws you deeper into the world of what it's like to live with an all-pervasive disorder. The sheer volume of detail (an extension of the OCD itself?) really brings the disorder into light.Yet Sher glosses over things, like her time with the comedy troupe, that might have proven interesting. Yes, it's a memoir about OCD, but it's also a memoir about her life, and it seems a shame that parts of her life get so little treatment. There were some blanks I would have liked to have seen filled in. As I said, it's like the sheer volume of detail about OCD is like a symptom of the OCD itself, and all the other details of life get burned away by the disease, and the reader is left the poorer for it.Some have found the book self-indulgent. Is it? Maybe at times, yes. I find that hard to comment on in a narrative about mental illness. I keep coming back to the point that part of what Sher is trying to demonstrate is how all-consuming this illness is, and it could be, to some readers, that this comes off as self-centered. But I think that is ultimately a misreading.Sher also does a good job outlining the dynamics of an incredibly complex family and her complex relationship to religion. It's impressive that she managed to squeeze this in there with as much time as she spends talking about the illness, but these are an inextricably intertwined, and she does a good job drawing out the links between the various aspects of these things.Overall, a moving memoir. I wish it had ended on a stronger note, even though I realize that there can't be any real "wrapping up" of an ongoing illness.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Ever since she was little, Abby Sher had the tendency of doing things in certain order, or for a certain amount of times, or collecting specific pieces of garbage. Abby also had the tendency to pray non-stop. "Amen, Amen, Amen" is Abby Sher's account of growing up with obsessive-compulsive disorder. At first, Abby finds comfort in her daily rituals, but soon realizes that there's nothing normal about her behavior. Nevertheless, Abby faces daily challenges and life traumas by adopting more and more compulsive habits. Her faith, in particular, becomes all consuming and Abby feels responsible for saving everyone and everything. The end result becomes an adulthood full of doubt and self-punishment. Abby Sher is a masterful writer and even as I experienced disbelief that anyone could be so trapped within themselves, I could not stop reading. She describes her experiences in a way that soon made me feel as I was walking in her shoes and dealing with the troubling compulsions that ruled her life. "Amen, Amen, Amen" is a memoir anyone will relate to and one that most people will learn a great deal from.