For Men Only, Revised and Updated Edition: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women
Written by Shaunti Feldhahn and Jeff Feldhahn
Narrated by Jeff Feldhahn
4.5/5
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About this audiobook
• How to get her real answers without games.
• How your provider instinct can actually cause her heartache - and what to do about it.
• Why "not tonight, honey" may not mean what you think.
• Why listening to her feelings is so hard for a guy, and a fix-it plan that works.
• Why her "I do" at the altar will always mean, "do you?" and the answer that rocks her world. Now updated with the latest scientific research to explain the fabulous female brain plus an all-new chapter that shows how to decode her most baffling behavior, For Men Only is your roadmap to making her happy.
Shaunti Feldhahn
Shaunti Feldhahn is a popular public speaker, bestselling author and social researcher. Her eye-opening books, including For Young Women Only: What You Need to Know About How Guys Think, have hit a nerve, selling two million copies in twenty languages. (The latest translation? Tigrinya. She didn’t know where that was from, either.) Shaunti’s research is regularly featured in an oddly diverse array of media (picture Focus on the Family one day, Cosmo the next). Shaunti and her husband and two active children reside in Atlanta and enjoy every moment of living at warp speed.
More audiobooks from Shaunti Feldhahn
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Reviews for For Men Only, Revised and Updated Edition
226 ratings17 reviews
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I reread this book recently, as a kind of refresher for myself. The first time I read it, I had just started dating the woman who is now my wife, almost four years ago. At the time, I had also read "For Women Only," the counterpart to this book, in an effort to offer notes and comments on it for my then-girlfriend's benefit.
Now, I am somewhat distanced from that companion reading, and I can see some flaws in this book as a stand-alone product.
Let me start off with the positives: It is an excellent book. It addresses an important need, and it offers research and statistics to do it. (Not being a researcher, I can't speak to the reliability of their research, but from what I do know, it's not so weak as to be discounted out of hand.) There are few other books in this same vein, although there are many which attempt to show men how women think; I have read even fewer which succeed even remotely.
This book manages to accomplish that, because it's not afraid to quote from the horse's mouth, as they say. Instead of philosophizing, psychologizing, or otherwise intellectualizing, the Feldhahns work with real women with real opinions saying things that - for some reason - they can't just say to their husbands/boyfriends.
That being the case, though, this book has some shortcomings. Almost all of these shortcomings fade, however, when this book is read in conjunction with its counterpart. When read alone, "For Men Only" is a pretty harsh condemnation of male behavior. Granted, some male behavior needs to change, but not all of it can be.
For example, when discussing the female multi-tasking, multi-thinking mind, the Feldhahns spend a great deal of time discussing feminine emotions. At several points, male emotions come into play - but these are discarded as ignorant, irrelevant, or unimportant. In short, from the perspective of this book alone, men must cater to and coddle the emotions of their wives, but if they ever have an emotional response to something, it should be dropped like a hot potato.
This sort of heavy-handed blame-game lurks throughout the book, and makes it upsetting, offensive, even unbearable to man forced to read it by itself. Only when you read both this book and its counterpart (which is pretty heavy-handed against women for their flaws) does everything fall into place as a mutual effort to improve the marriage and each other.
So, a note to any women who want their man to read this book: don't take the titles literally, and make sure he reads the one for you, too. It's important context.3 people found this helpful
- Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5If you read my review on Ms. Feldhahn's other book, 'For Women Only,' I think you won't be surprised that the same criticism applies here.This book states up front that the authors' intent is to grossly generalize their findings, and they do. I was hoping for more than just a flip of what was in 'For Women Only' but there wasn't really any new information here - in fact it seemed to lack the depth of the first book.The first book highlighted more specifics, like how men enjoyed it when their women 'played with them' - enjoyed the same diversions, like golf or even just watching sports together. I didn't see the opposite in FMO - what is it that women enjoy for their man to do with them?There seemed (to me) to be an inordinate amount of time spent on a women's appearance (in each of the chapters), which I found shallow. Obviously, as a woman, I understand how important appearance is, but there's so much more to me than that. Men may be visual, but wasn't the point of this book to show them what they CAN'T see? Both books also imply that any infidelity in a marriage will always involve the man and his lustful, wandering eye. Whether women are visual or not (and I know for a fact many are), they have their own escapes, be it through soap operas, romance novels or some other source. Neither book addresses the feminine side of lust or a man's reaction/interpretation of it.There are tidbits to be gleaned, both for men and women, but as before, I recommend that couples look at this book together, and consider the lens used to write it.
3 people found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5U really think this book is very insightful for men.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Wow! As great as her other book, For Women Only, which I read a few years ago. I didn't learn a lot from FWO but what I did learn was life-changing and has stuck with me. It was so life-changing I knew I had to get this book, FMO. And, yes, I read it. I read it because I wanted to be sure that what she reported in her findings truly reflected my feelings. I highlighted all that had meaning to me and I am asking David to read it now in that context. If he reads it it will again have life-changing results. It's that good! I would recommend both books to people wanting to better understand relationships.
1 person found this helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Awesome awesome awesome book. Great insight into the female mind.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This book has given me an inside view on how men think as related to women its really helpful
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5An amazing book that has changed my marriage for the better. I'm a better husband for reading this book!
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Love the audiobook amazing insight I would recommend it to a lot of men
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Guys! Want a book that will help you figure out your woman? HERE IT IS!
You will NOT be disappointed while reading this book nor with the results that come from its application!
Get it and do it! - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5this was one of the rare audiobooks that I wanted to listen to again once I reached the end.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This was a very good read. It helped me understand my wife.
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5I did not like the book is was over stretched with no base or arguments
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This liberated me in many ways in my marriage. Thanks to the authors - God bless you
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Love it and would recommend this for the wives to hear as well as the husbands.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Simple, back to the basics book that opens your eyes to what you have and what you have to do. Very enlightening
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I'm a woman who listened to this and finally! Someone who took the initiative to understand us women and not write us off as irrational overly emotional dumb and "impossible" creatures. Some parts of this book also made me tear up because I related so much to it.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Insightful on ways men should treat their women and also in regard to exposing how women really think and how that differs from us men. Main takeaway is that women aren’t really that hard to figure out. We just can’t look through the lens of our male thinking patterns. We have to be open and willing enough to unlearn everything we think we know so we can really see women for what they truly are. Beautiful counterparts that need to be treated with love