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    Not "Just Friends": Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity
    Unavailable
    Not "Just Friends": Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity
    Unavailable
    Not "Just Friends": Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity
    Audiobook15 hours

    Not "Just Friends": Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity

    Written by Shirley P. Glass, Ph.D. and Jean Coppock Staeheli

    Narrated by Laural Merlington

    4/5

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    About this audiobook

    You're right to be cautious when you hear these words: "I'm telling you, we're just friends."

    Good people in good marriages are having affairs. The workplace and the Internet have become fertile breeding grounds for "friendships" that can slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. Yet you can protect your relationship from emotional or sexual betrayal by recognizing the red flags that mark the stages of slipping into an improper, dangerous intimacy that can threaten your marriage.

    "Not 'Just Friends' puts a new face on infidelity. The author, using clinical experience and current research, broadens its definition, causes, and means of resolution. I recommend it for anyone considering an affair, in an affair, or recovering from an affair." -Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., author of Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples

    "A must-read for anyone who ever hopes to be happy in a long-term relationship." -Pat Love, Ed.D., author of The Truth About Love and Hot Monogamy

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBrilliance Audio
    Release dateFeb 22, 2012
    ISBN9781455864119

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    Reviews for Not "Just Friends"

    4/5

    42 ratings4 reviews

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    • 1/5
      This is a very dangerous and damaging book. It is the absolute worst one I’ve seen on infidelity. It basically makes excuses for the person who cheated, and I nearly fainted in how she warmly talks about affair partners in the part on them. I kid you not one example who slept with THREE married men she described as having a heart of gold and being a very giving and too kind of a person who felt so sorry for her latest affair partner whose wife shopped too much! The author tells betrayed spouses to look at the positive personality traits of the affair partner! Like let’s have compassion for the other woman. People who knowingly sleep with married men are not victims. The author repeatedly says things to “explain away” why someone cheated and acts like most were whoopsie accidents. Oh no I never intended to have feelings for someone other than my spouse. It happened by accident and I am a highly moral person who could not control myself and I fell onto another person’s private parts. I started a friendship with secret lunches, communication and then we couldn’t keep our hands off her. I am convinced the author may have had an experience that gives her this perspective. Maybe she’s cheated, been cheated on and trying to convince herself it’s not really so bad and intentional of her spouse to do it, or she came from a family with a cheater she is trying to excuse. I can’t imagine where else these views would come from. I get a lot of marriage counselors are mostly seeing couples with infidelity who are trying to work it out but that doesn’t mean you should downplay the moral character involved when someone cheats on a spouse.

      1 person found this helpful

    • 5/5
      Love this book and I recommend this to everyone. If you enjoy this book I also suggest “I love you. I don’t trust you”. Another really good read! The author is no longer with us otherwise I wish she had more books I could have read on.

      1 person found this helpful

    • 1/5
      This book is religious, heteronormative propaganda. I read it at the same time I read Redefining Our Relationships by Wendy O Matik, which was much better, even for people who don't want to be in an open relationship because it discusses ambiguity within relationships/friendships between men and women as being healthy and normal, not something to fear or repress. Monogamy might be a goal or an ideal to strive for, but within long term relationships it is usually not the reality. Jealousy and possessiveness are part of the problem - just because you are in a relationship with someone doesn't mean you own them or get to control their body as if it is your property. The whole idea that having an "emotional affair" is cheating/infidelity is like committing a thought crime or something. I mean, ok, people get crushes, they fall in and out of love with their friends, whatever - but if we really love them, don't we want our partners to be happy and feel free enough to connect with others who love and care for them? If that can happen with respect and compassion for the relationship, then really, is there a problem? Society tells us that love outside of a primary relationship is threatening, but is that necessarily true? I think we need to question this.

      4 people found this helpful

    • 5/5
      Perhaps one of the the leading texts on the practical realities of human relationships, on the work of marriage and forgiveness, and on the question of fidelity and trust. This book is realistic and practical in paving a way forward that takes our human limits into account alongside the hope of something better.

      1 person found this helpful