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    You're Wearing That?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation
    Unavailable
    You're Wearing That?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation
    Unavailable
    You're Wearing That?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation
    Audiobook9 hours

    You're Wearing That?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation

    Written by Deborah Tannen

    Narrated by Cassandra Campbell

    3.5/5

    ()

    Currently unavailable

    Currently unavailable

    About this audiobook

    Deborah Tannen's #1 New York Times bestseller You Just Don't Understand revolutionized communication between women and men. Now, in her most provocative and engaging book to date, she takes on what is potentially the most fraught and passionate connection of women's lives: the mother-daughter relationship.

    It was Tannen who first showed us that men and women speak different languages. Mothers and daughters speak the same language-but still often misunderstand each other, as they struggle to find the right balance between closeness and independence. Both mothers and daughters want to be seen for who they are, but tend to see the other as falling short of who she should be. Each overestimates the other's power and underestimates her own.

    Why do daughters complain that their mothers always criticize, while mothers feel hurt that their daughters shut them out? Why do mothers and daughters critique each other on the Big Three-hair, clothes, and weight-while longing for approval and understanding? And why do they scrutinize each other for reflections of themselves?

    Deborah Tannen answers these and many other questions as she explains why a remark that would be harmless coming from anyone else can cause an explosion when it comes from your mother or your daughter. She examines every aspect of this complex dynamic, from the dark side that can shadow a woman throughout her life, to the new technologies like e-mail and instant messaging that are transforming mother-daughter communication. Most important, she helps mothers and daughters understand each other, the key to improving their relationship.

    With groundbreaking insights, pitch-perfect dialogues, and deeply moving memories of her own mother, Tannen untangles the knots daughters and mothers can get tied up in. Readers will appreciate Tannen's humor as they see themselves on every page and come away with real hope for breaking down barriers and opening new lines of communication. Eye-opening and heartfelt, You're Wearing That? illuminates and enriches one of the most important relationships in our lives.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherPenguin Random House Audio
    Release dateJan 24, 2006
    ISBN9781415931707
    Unavailable
    You're Wearing That?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation
    Author

    Deborah Tannen

    Deborah Frances Tannen is an author and professor of linguistics at Georgetown University in Washington, D.C.

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    Reviews for You're Wearing That?

    3.5/5

    68 ratings5 reviews

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    • 4/5
      I found this book enlightening as to what goes on between my own daughter and myself and how misunderstandings arise in conversations. We all tend to listen and speak according to our own realities, and this book, written by the linguist Deborah Tannen offers understanding as to our behaviors. Man examples are given, from hundreds of interviews done by Ms.Tannen in the course of her teaching students about conversations and from many people that she encountered in various ways. Ms. Tanner also tells of her reactions to her mother and her interpretation of conversations, and explains how females tend to lean toward the father, at times shutting out the mother without knowing about it or meaning to do so. This book would be an excellent to give to any family member, mother, daughter or friend, as it opens up ways to communicate and understand each other in a more loving way. None of us wake up each morning to hurt a mother or a daughter, but along the way, a spoken word can be taken the wrong way, and without information found in this book, a relationship can become estranged rather than closer as the individuals age. What one individual says in a comment can be taken the wrong way by the other, and only the mother-daughter relationship comes with such powerful ammunition to blast the relationship wide open. Good reading, and a great gift for any female that you care about.
    • 4/5
      This book was interesting, even fascinating.I love reading about why people think and act the way they do, and Tannen has made some amazing discoveries about why mothers and daughters interact the way they do. She also has some helpful suggestions. I enjoyed this book and I learned some things as well.
    • 4/5
      Replete with examples, the author helps to identify common patterns in communication between mothers and daughters, the patterns that cause oh so much friction in daily communication. Those hot button topics? They're in here - weight, hair, clothes. Those conversations that start off bad and escalate - predictably - into an argument? They're in here too. It's difficult to read this book without seeing it through the veil of my own interactions with my mother, however the book also makes me appreciate my mother even more. It also gives me tools to defuse those hot button conversations, should I be so rational as to use them. Well worth reading if you're a daughter or a mother, or even if you're simply caught in the crossfire.
    • 3/5
      You're Wearing That? should have been a long article instead of a book. The premise that humans, especially female humans, often say one thing while meaning another, does not require hundreds pages of case studies to prove. I found myself groaning, and even skimming at times.There were a few belly laughs that make it worth the slog, though.
    • 5/5
      Is there any relationship as volitile, emotionally charged, and important as the mother/daughter relationship? Tannen explores how the interactions between mother and daughter is different than other female interactions (or male female interactions, which she has covered previously).My mother and I (thankfully) are not as bad as most of the examples in this book, but it still helps me understand how what I say can be interpreted incorrectly, even by the woman who knows me best.This would also be a good book for fathers to read, to help them understand the strange relationship his wife and daughter have.