Recovering from Growing Up with an Addicted or Borderline Parent
Instructor: Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes
Executive Director, AllCEUs.com
Podcast Host: Counselor Toolbox
CEUs are available for this presentation at https://www.allceus.com/member/cart/index/product/id/375/c/
Objectives
~ Review the characteristics of BPD
~ Compare and contrast BPD with addictive behaviors
~ Examine ways to implement the activities presented in the book in a group format
Characteristics of BPD
~ Poorly developed, or unstable self-image, often associated with excessive self-criticism
~ Difficulty recognizing the feelings & needs of others
~ Interpersonal hypersensitivity (i.e., prone to feel slighted or insulted)
~ Perceptions of others tend to focus on negative attributes or vulnerabilities.
Characteristics of BPD
~ Intense, unstable, and conflicted close relationships, marked by mistrust, neediness, and fear of abandonment
~ Close relationships
~ Viewed in extremes of idealization and devaluation
~ Alternating between over involvement and withdrawal.
Effects on Others
~ Feeling inadequate despite best efforts to appease
~ Lack of emotional boundaries
~ Responsible for the parent’s happiness
~ Guilt for personal happiness
~ Difficulty trusting people due to alternations between feeling appreciated and condemned
~ Anxiety because the parent was unpredictable
~ Hypervigilance
I Never Knew It Had A Name
~ Group Activity 1
~ Discuss the function of each symptom for the parent
~ Have participants identify any behaviors they have which may also resemble that symptom
~ Review and refute the take-aways providing practical cognitive and interpersonal skills
~ Group Activity 2
~ Stop & Think: The Lessons are Clear—Review and Refute
All Grown Up
~ Examine the effects of the borderline personality on the living conditions
~ Chaos
~ Abuse and Neglect
~ Boundary Violations
~ Invalidation
~ Role Reversals
~ Looks are Everything
~ Keen Perception
All Grown Up
~ 6 Seeds to Grow a Healthy Child
~ Support
~ Respect and Acceptance
~ Voice
~ Unconditional Love and Affection
~ Consistency
~ Security
All Grown Up
~ Group Activity 1
~ Examine each effect of the Borderline Personality
~ Discuss how each was present in the family of origin
~ Discuss how each is manifested in the client’s current life
~ Identify methods to eliminate those dysfunctional patterns
All Grown Up
~ Group Activity 2
~ 6 Seeds: Discuss how to use those 6 principles to
~ Reparent/nurture self
~ Nurture healthy relationships
~ Prevent vulnerabilities
~ Group Activity 3
~ Stop and Think: Resiliency Builders
Grieving a Lost Childhood
~ Understand the grieving process
~ Review messages received in childhood about dealing with losses
~ Identify losses and feelings associated with the dysfunctional childhood
~ Identify continuing issues with the borderline/addicted parent
Grieving a Lost Childhood
~ Group Activity
~ Describe what you would have liked your childhood to be like
~ As a group, identify ways to translate that to present day.
Guilt, Responsibility & Forgiveness
~ Identify potential guilt-triggers for the adult child
~ Discuss how guilt works, and what the benefits/motivations for guilt may be
~ Identify and discusses different origins of guilt
~ Encourage identification of what can & cannot be controlled
~ Explore the issues of guilt and responsibility
~ Encourage participants to examine their beliefs related to forgiveness
Guilt, Responsibi