Professional Documents
Culture Documents
African American
Divorce
Mia McDowell
Elizabeth Kent
English 1020 Section T
Monsters Theme
April 10, 2016
Table of Contents
Introduction/Preface
I.
Introduction/Preface
Divorce in todays African American community is now the
new normal. Couples in the African American community are now
ending more marriages at an extreme alarming rate compared to
them jumping the broom. This research in no way relates to all
African American couples that are married, for some do go on to
have very successful marriages. In my entries for this project, all of
these entries are completely based on fact except the diary entry
which is fiction. All of my entries pretty much all tie in together
being that majority of my sources provided me with the same
information complementing each other in one way or another.
According to my many sources, there are many different
explanations that try to make sense of why this divorce rate
continues to increase. People in this community, particularly
women, tend to now focus solely on their careers and are now
becoming the main bread winners of their families. (Molina, Olga.
93.) This causes a strain in a relationship or marriage because it
can make a man feel inferior. People in the African American
community also tend to mock the unhealthy marriage patterns of
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Instructions
1) Let all problems build up and feel free to combine a few
2) Do not try to resolve any issues or try to work it out
3) Do not seek help from therapists or your local pastor
4) Bring with you to your current marriage baggage from your past such as unhealthy relationship
patterns or habits that you practiced in your previous relationships or ones that you may have
witnessed your divorced parents exhibit in or during your childhood.
5) Demonstrate those unhealthy relationships patterns as stated in number 5 to current marriage
6) Do not seek higher education or high wages or income, please stay stagnant
7) You may pick and choose which ingredients you would like to combine to make your own special
version of the perfect African American divorce
Once the ingredients combine and settle, you have created the perfect divorce. This recipe
typically serves about 70 percent of all African American married couples.
Note: Information from African Americans and Marriage article from Divorce 360
written by Don Moore.
Dear Diary,
Going through this divorce is the most draining thing and process that I
have ever gone through. Me and my soon to be ex-husband have not been on
speaking terms after our big blow up Sunday at my moms house in front of
our children. Our daughter is really impacted by our constant bickering and
not having her fathers presence in our home. I pray that one day she will
understand why this had to happen like my older daughter has. I cried for
days after our fight on Sunday, I dropped off my girls at my moms house
because I need time to gather myself together and because I know it truly
takes a village to raise a child. That mindset might be what has me headed
to a divorce court today. Eddie hated that I included my family in our
martial problems and that they were so hands on with parenting our girls. I
really think that separated us and pulled us apart. Ever since weve split up I
have had to step up to the plate and become the main breadwinner for our
family. I have a new job with a higher paying wage. I thought of going to
therapy with Eddie to try and make it work but I know that he would never
agree. He grew up believing whatever happened at home behind closed doors,
should stay there behind closed doors and in the home. He also has the stigma
that seeking help makes you crazy. I really believe our marriage is over and
all I can do is pray.
Sincerely,
Lisa
Descriptive Paragraph
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Top Reasons
African Americans inability to seek help from therapists
because of stigmas of being mentally ill in the community
High unemployment rates amongst the community and low
education levels
Incarceration
Domestic Violence
African American women are now becoming the main
breadwinners of the family
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Sunshine Times
Sarah Example | March 11 2014 | Issue 25-27
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Mia: What do you think is the number one cause for this?
Judge Lynn Toler: Social media by far has come a long way and
sometimes it is for the worse. The things we do in private on our
cellphones tend to get some couples in trouble as well. In the
African American couples however, I find that their economic
realities are a big part of the reason they end up before me. They
tend to ignore them until they manifest in other parts of the
marriage.
Mia: Why does a couples financial standing impact the success of
their marriage?
Judge Lynn Toler: Because once you say I Do everything you
do together is a joint venture. You must make some decisions and
choices when it comes to your finances together from that point on.
Economic realities can be very stressful and can seriously put a
strain on any couple
Mia: What do you do in your spare time?
Judge Lynn Toler: I play tennis, paint, and write books. I have two
best sellers out currently and a third on the way.
Mia: Do you have any advice for these couples?
Judge Lynn Toler: It is very important that you invest in yourself
even after you are married. It is important to you go back to school
so that you can seek a higher education and receive higher wages
which will also help your financial situations in your marriage.
Note: Information gathered from actual interview source between Judge Lynn Toler and Tampa
Bay Times writer, Robbyn Mitchell.
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Timeline: African
American Marriage
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CONCLUSION
This project has taught me so much. I learned just high and
alarming the divorce rate in the African American community
really is. Doing my research on this topic also showed me why
so many people find this rate is so disheartening because being
that African American ancestors, such as slaves, had to truly
endure so much to have the right to marry and have their unions
legally recognized. Now it seems that divorce in the African
American community is now the new normal hence my title.
I learned multiple reasons during my research on why
divorce in the community is so common today. One of the main
causes for this misfortune is because of the financial strain or
burden most African American couples faces because of low
education levels. (Barclay. 39) It has been reported that in the
black community there are extreme high unemployment rates
amongst communities as well as high poverty levels. (Barclay.
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