National Scholastic Press Association

yearbook critique scoresheet

Publication Name: Talon City/State: El Paso, TX School:

Andress High School

[ ] Senior High [ ] Jr. High/Middle

Type of School:

Part One: Concept/Essentials

An original, imaginative theme or concept developed through words or design elements (for example, a logo), unique to the school for the specific year, generally serves as a unifying element for the book. The cover has immediate visual appeal and introduces the theme/ concept; the endsheets coordinate with the cover and may also contain conceptual development. (Some staffs may choose to leave the endsheets blank due to reader preferences or budget constraints.) The theme/concept is developed through words, photos and graphics on the opening and closing pages and dividers, with details showing relevance to the particular year. Opening, closing and divider pages have design styles distinctively different from the rest of the book. The name and date of the book appear on the front cover. The book name, school name, city, state and volume number appear on the spine. The title page lists the name of the book, school, city, street address, state,

Students, advisers and judges should consider these criteria when evaluating quality of work submitted. For additional guidelines and journalistic standards related to this topic, please refer to pages 4-6 of the NSPA Yearbook Guidebook.
zip code, year and volume number. (Often other information such as the phone number, school enrollment, fax and Web site, is also provided.) The table of contents, listing all major sections including reference areas, appears early. While it may be creative and theme-oriented, it is readerfriendly and accurate. Generally it does not appear on the title page. Folios, at least one per each two-page spread, identify page content as well as give page numbers. A colophon gives information on staff policies, technical aspects of the book and the printing, including fonts, equipment used and sale prices. Acknowledgments are tastefully presented; if dedications or memorials are included, they should be presented in an understated manner. This should be part of the staffs publication policy for fairness and consistency. The book clearly and logically depicts the personality of the school and captures the specific year. It is a historical record that will anchor readers in time.

Judges Comments on Concept

A. Theme/Concept Development
Development is comprehensive enough for impact and components are readily identifiable as part of the package. Both verbal and visual theme elements appear throughout the book to create unity and a consistent personality, although one aspect may be more prevalent. Section titles and/or book organization seem logical rather than contrived. The books organization and overall effect demonstrate evidence that the theme/concept influenced major decisions in design, coverage angles and photo editing.

Strengths:

Theme appeared in all of the right places and was not hammered into other areas. Your cover effectively introduced your theme. Excellent theme graphics were displayed on your endsheets.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Perhaps in your table of contents, you can consider adding spinoff themes such as "Bound for Challenges" in Student Life and "Bound for Victory" in Sports.

5/08

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Part One: COnCePt/essentials

B. essenTiAls

Cover, spine and title page include necessary reference information. Table of contents is accurate, folios provide useful information and index appears to be a complete and accurate listing of all topics, clubs and sports in addition to people covered. Strengths:

Accurate table of contents. Book spine, endsheets and table of contents included all essentials. Helpful colophon.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Your index was excellent. Perhaps you can consider placing the topics in all capitals, bold, or italics to help distinguish these entries from the names.

sCore for ConCepT/essenTiAls (use increments of 10)

Poor
[ ]

150
Fair

Average

250

Very Good

400

Excellent

500

ToTAl poinTs:

________ 490

mArk of DisTinCTion (A mark of distinction is given by a judge or an NSPA official for exemplary work in this area. Cite reason below.)
For:

Creative theme emphasized the uniqueness of the year, school, atmosphere and individuals.

Part twO: COverage

Students, advisers and judges should consider these criteria when evaluating quality of work submitted. For additional guidelines and journalistic standards related to this topic, please refer to pages 9-10 of the NSPA Yearbook Guidebook.
Coverage plan is specific to the school and the year rather than following a pattern from past books. The numbers of sections and their organization is logical. Content may be presented in traditional, blended or chronological style but all major areas are present to represent lifestyles, academics, organizations, sports and people. Coverage reflects the diversity of the school population and an effort to cover all individuals. Emphasis is on what makes this year different from others. Coverage has been personalized by use of strong storytelling photos and meaningful quotes. Coverage is balanced and well-rounded, with emphasis on student involvement. Unique camera and copy angles or conceptual approaches enliven routine coverage. When appropriate, jump coverage allows readers and reporters the luxury of more possibilities. Similarly, single page design may be appropriate for other topics. Effort has been made to cover as much of the year as possible, including summer activities. The community and national events are reflected in coverage, again with emphasis on student involvement and local reactions. Controversial or sensitive issues relevant to the school/year are developed thoroughly. The book is seen as more than a public relations tool.

Judges Comments on Coverage

A. sTuDenT life/lifesTyles
Coverage reflects the diversity of the school population and students varied interests both in and out of school. Major school events as well as daily routines are covered to show the full student experience, on campus and off. The section captures the years teen culture, including what students are wearing, listening to, reading, buying and thinking about. Strengths:

Excellent coverage of events and students' experiences with them. Great job of covering a variety of individuals rather than "same ole same ole."
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Part twO: COverage

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Perhaps you can research a bit on how the current year differed from the previous one.

B. ACADemiCs

Curricular developments and class-related activities are covered from the student perspective. All class offerings are somehow represented, although not necessarily by department. The section offers a sense of what students learn and how they learn it through innovative and interesting approaches. Strengths:

Great how you covered the electives and special programs. Coverage showed obvious student and faculty involvement.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

None - keep up the excellent work in showing students and faculty participating in academic activities.

C. CluBs/orgAnizATions

Coverage emphasizes student involvement; group photos are included here or may appear in a separate reference section. In addition to highlighting the groups events, activities and specific accomplishments, coverage includes photos taken over time (rather than from one event) and provides reactions from participants rather than a listing of goals/purpose. Strengths:

Great how you placed the group shots in the index so the clubs spreads can receive more coverage of their accomplishments.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

None - keep up the excellent job of showing activities your clubs participate in and the significant achievements they produce.

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Part twO: COverage

D. sporTs

Complete and accurate scoreboards, as well as season highlights and statistics, supplement feature coverage. Balanced coverage of boys, girls, varsity, junior varsity and freshman teams reflects the entire athletic department fairly. Practices, sideline activities, team interaction, travel and summer activities are included in addition to game coverage. Quotes, definitions, timelines and other relevant team info is provided, with focus on players rather than coaches. Coverage extends through entire season, including photos from a wide variety of games and activities. Emphasis is on action; team photos do not dominate spreads (or may appear in a separate reference section). Coverage of intramural and off-campus, team and individual or recreational sports is included (or may appear in the student life section). Fans, trainers, coaches and managers are represented.

Strengths:

Fair coverage among all sports teams. Excellent how you covered various aspects of each team, such as behind the scenes events and game highlights. Sports photos displayed actions rather than posed photos.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

You had great scoreboards but also include the total wins-loses-ties at the bottom of each scoreboard and for every sport. It was great how on page 129, one of the captions specified the final score of the game. Perhaps you can do this in more of your captions. In these additional captions, consider giving information about how the score or outcome was affected by the photo shown. What was the score at the time the photo was taken? What was the final score at the end of the game or match?

e. people

All grade levels, faculty, administration and support personnel are included in a logical fashion. Faculty data (subjects taught, extracurricular assignments, titles and/or degrees) is provided (usually listed by individual portraits but may appear in the index by faculty names). Unless the portrait pages are organized as reference-only, feature coverage here extends coverage by including reader-relevant topics. Strengths:

Excellent job covering all students, faculty and staff. Great how each and every portrait spread included some type of copy.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Your faculty/staff pages should specify courses taught, such as "Chemistry 10" and "Government 11." You should also list the extracurricular activities sponsored and sports teams coached. When incorporating senior superlatives, you should follow the usual rules of essential journalism. For example, you should include a brief copy package about these superlatives. Incorporate the five "w's" and one "h" to this copy. Write complete captions for each photo. I recommend also replacing the posed photos with candid ones. This will validate your contest.
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Part twO: COverage

f. ADverTising
Strengths:

Section includes ads designed to appeal to student readers rather than just business card ads. Some type of content, whether community or theme-related, invites readers to these pages for features, quotes or infographics.

Great layouts. Ads are of high interest to your audience.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Add a feature or two about your community to your ads section.

g. inDex

A complete list of all persons, events, clubs, activities, sports and advertisers references each time they appear in the book. Copy and photos added here, as part of division letters or separately, provides additional coverage and may add to theme/concept development or serve as a reference area for team or club photos. Strengths:

Fantastic how your index included subjects. Group and candid photos helped to break the monotony of the index design.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

I recommend adding captions for the candid photos that appeared in your index. It was great how your division letters used the same font as the one you used for your theme font. Keep in mind that depending on your future themes, you can use the division letters to incorporate quotes or theme-related material.

sCore for CoverAge (use increments of 10)

Poor
[ ]

300
Fair

Average

500

Very Good

800

Excellent

1000

ToTAl poinTs:

________ 850

mArk of DisTinCTion (A mark of distinction is given by a judge or an NSPA official for exemplary work in this area. Cite reason below.)
For:

Student journalists showed journalistic integrity when covering all topics.

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Part three: Design

Students, advisers and judges should consider these criteria when evaluating quality of work submitted. For additional guidelines and journalistic standards related to this topic, please refer to pages 24-27 of the NSPA Yearbook Guidebook.
It is evident that most, if not all, layouts have been designed in two-page spread units, generally using a consistent column or grid structure. Elements are presented in a logical, imaginative and well-planned manner showing awareness of the normal reading habit of moving from left to right, top to bottom. The dominant visual element (usually a photo or photo package) on a spread is generally at least twice as large as any other. Each layout contains a variety of sizes and shapes of photos which repeat and contrast the dominant. A horizontal eyeline, created by an actual line or alignment of photos and other elements, connects the two facing pages. Subjects of photos do not look off page edges, drawing the readers eye off the spread. Each layout is balanced with heavier elements such as photos placed closer to the center than lighter elements such as type and white space. Use of space demonstrates planning and packaging for maximum impact. Three types are used simultaneously: tight spacing to package elements as a unit, standard spacing to separate one content area from another and expanded spacing to isolate or emphasize something special. Throughout the book, these types of spacing are used consistently. Consistent external margins (sides, top, bottom) are maintained to frame each spread. Each margin is defined by having at least one element (photo, copy block, caption, headline) touch it. Bleeding elements extend to the edge of the page; generally its best to bleed only one photo on each margin of a spread and to avoid bleeding a photo off a corner. Non-rectangular shaped, tilted photos and other special effects have been used effectively and sparingly. Graphic elements such as lines, screens, reverses and spot color enhance the content of spreads rather than call attention to themselves; gimmicks that distract are avoided. Each section might feature different graphic elements, but a consistent design style is evident in each section. Elements are repeated throughout a section to achieve unity rather than decorate. Body copy and captions are consistent in type style and size within each section and possibly throughout the whole book for unity. Body copy, captions and headlines fit the space allotted for them and are set in attractive and readable styles in line lengths appropriate for maximum readability. No copy block or caption is too wide for readers to follow, nor so narrow that lines are choppy. Special attention is paid to hyphenation to maximize readability. Captions touch the photos to which they refer or are placed as close as possible; no more than two traditional captions are stacked. Group captions may be used for photo collections; numbers are generally the simplest and most effective method for indicating which caption corresponds to each photo. Readers should not have to hunt to match photos and captions. Copy follows a natural hierarchy in proportion, with headlines as the largest copy and each package or content areas point size varying based on its overall size and position on the spread. Typographic elements such as initial letters, lead-ins, quote blurbs and display type enhance readability and attractiveness of spreads by leading readers into copy without causing distractions. The desired result of all layouts is effective, appealing communication. Whether the design approach is modular with a variety of storytelling packages or more traditional with fewer, larger photos and copy, the design plan chosen fits the content and helps tell the story.

Judges Comments on Design

A. BAsiC lAyouT
Spreads follow a column or grid plan, making pages easy for readers to follow. Basic concepts such as dominance, proportion, balance and eyeflow are demonstrated. Each section has a distinctive look but also features enough variation to avoid visual redundancy. Strengths:

Great how you designed your portrait spreads in rectangles with names to the outside. Having some of your dominant photos cross the gutter rendered unified page spreads. Good headline and copy placement.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Arrange your layouts and photos so action is facing toward the gutter and not off the page. Please see page 10 (top photo), 19 (lower right photo), 131 (dominant photo) and 135 (upper right photo) for examples of action facing off the page.

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Part three: Design

B. use of grAphiC elemenTs

Space is used effectively to unify, package, separate and emphasize content. Lines, screens, color and other elements enhance overall effect and fit in with section and book personality. Color use is restrained and effective to complement photos rather than add decoration. Scanned artwork and photo/graphic manipulations have proper resolution for maximum quality.

Strengths:

Full color was a true enhancement to your publication.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

None - keep up the excellent work in making sure that graphics do not overwhelm spreads.

C. TypogrAphy

Type is easy to read; copy, captions and headlines are presented in consistent sizes with readability as the priority. Headlines and copy starters such as initial leaders and lead-ins or mini-headlines are unified in type choices. Careful attention to detail regarding kerning and tracking, as well as hyphenation, enhances display type and headline packages. Strengths:

A good standard font was used to print your body copy.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

None - keep in mind that drop caps can be another great device you can use to introduce your captions.

D. seCTion-speCifiC ConsiDerATions

Portrait pages are organized in rectangular panels with names to the outside for easy reference and maximized space. Advertisements incorporate photographs, copy and/or graphics for maximum visual appeal. Senior ads (baby ads, grad ads) are consistent in overall style but have visual variety. Sizes vary per spread for contrast. The index uses devices such as division letters, hanging indents and varied type style (bold, italic or both) to aid readers. Photos, copy and/or graphics add visual appeal to index pages. Reference section(s), if included, match the books overall style through repeating colors, graphics and/or typefaces. Group photos for clubs and teams are designed in varied sizes appropriate to the number of people pictured in order to achieve a consistent head size.

Strengths:

Great how you separated the group shots from action ones to place the emphasis on achievements of your clubs and sports teams.

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Part three: Design

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

None - keep up the great work in body copy and caption font consistency.

sCore for Design (use increments of 10)

Poor
[ ]

(100 maximum, see entry form completed by school) Excellent

DeDuction for non-StuDent Work: ToTAl poinTs:

________

300
Fair

Average

500

Very Good

800

1000

________ 850

mArk of DisTinCTion (A mark of distinction is given by a judge or an NSPA official for exemplary work in this area. Cite reason below.)
For:

Student journalists displayed knowledge of essential design principles.

Part FOur: writing & eDiting

Each story focuses on an original and limited angle; reflects research and reporting; avoids generalities; specifically answers who, what, when, where, why and how and does not contain editorializing (writers opinion). In general, traditional blocks of copy are written in third person, active voice, past tense. In traditional pieces, leads, taking on a variety of forms such as description, direct quotations and anecdotes, capture readers attention and encourage them to go on. Meaningful story-telling quotes and background material reflect thorough interviewing in both traditional copy and secondary packages. Effective transitions, a variety of sentence types and lengths and short paragraphs enhance readability of all copy. Secondary stories are presented in a variety of forms (feature, quote-transition format, infographs, Q and A, first person anecdotes, quotes, etc.). Often a primary copy block is supplemented by other types of stories. Captions employ a variety of openings; begin with impact words; are often two or more sentences long and give specific details on who, what, when, where, why and how. Quotations are used to give a more complete picture. Lengthy captions serve as sidebars or replace traditional body copy.

Students, advisers and judges should consider these criteria when evaluating quality of work submitted. For additional guidelines and journalistic standards related to this topic, please refer to pages 10-24 of the NSPA Yearbook Guidebook.
Captions add to photos, dont state the obvious, dont editorialize or speculate about or comment on photos. Gag captions are never used. All people featured in photos are identified completely and in consistent format. In group identifications, Front. . .Row 2. . .Back are used and left to right is considered unnecessary. Captions generally do not contain adverbs but do utilize strong nouns, adjectives and active voice verbs. The first sentence is written in present tense; after that, past tense is acceptable if appropriate. Headlines use the exact few words that most accurately describe specific story content, do more than state the obvious, and lead reader into copy. They are clever/imaginative without using clichs. Rather than labels, headlines are generally a combination of primary and secondary heads, most often pairing feature style (inventive phrases) with sentence style secondary headlines usually employing present tense verbs. Copy, captions and headlines are carefully edited and proofed to fit space, eliminate wordiness and errors in mechanics (spelling, sentence structure, agreement, grammar, usage, syntax). In addition, all words printed in the yearbook should be checked for accuracy, should maintain consistent style within each section and should follow the publications overall style.

Judges Comments on Writing & editing

A. BoDy Copy AnD siDeBArs
Strengths:

Great how all spreads included some type of copy. Good sidebars. Journalists included storytelling quotes from a variety of individuals.

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Part FOur: writing & eDiting

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

When writing copy, use the third person voice. On page 2, the writer used "we." The writers on pages 62, 75 and 155 used "you." Omit editorial statements as seen on page 5 ("everyone has a passion") and 10 ("memory still lingers" and "leaves an impact on a life forever"). Copy should be written in the past tense consistently. On pages 8, 10, 17, 25, 47 and 71, the copy use the present tense.

B. heADlines
Strengths:

Spreads included a main headline.

Main headlines highlighted the important information.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Add subheads that provide concrete information. Examples of subheads include "Varsity Volleyball faces a change when realignment places them into new Southwestern League" and "Junior Varsity achieves a 9-1 record and qualifies for Texas League."

C. CApTions
Strengths:

Good how captions identified everyone who appeared in the photo with the exception of the index candid photos.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Omit adjectives and adverbs from your captions. Examples of adjectives and adverbs include "challenging" (page 3), "effortlessly" (page 5), "helpful" (page 24) and "difficult" (page 24). Eliminate indefine terms from your captions, such as "some" (page 10, 11, 50 and 74) and "many" (page 63). When writing captions, do not use cliches such as "breaking out of your shell" (page 139) and "all about the fun" (page 141).

sCore for WriTing/eDiTing (use increments of 10)

Poor
[ ]

(100 maximum, see entry form completed by school)

DeDuction for non-StuDent Work: ToTAl poinTs:

________

300
Fair

Average

500

Very Good

800

Excellent

1000

________ 800

mArk of DisTinCTion (A mark of distinction is given by a judge or an NSPA official for exemplary work in this area. Cite reason below.)
For:

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Part Five: PhOtOgraPhy

Students, advisers and judges should consider these criteria when evaluating quality of work submitted. For additional guidelines and journalistic standards related to this topic, please refer to pages 28-29 of the NSPA Yearbook Guidebook.
Photo content emphasizes action, emotion, faces and a strong center of interest. Content avoids backs, lowered heads, dark shadows, mugging for the camera, static scenes and posed shots. Visual variety exists by representing multiple angles (high, low, side, back) and distances (close, medium, wide angle). Cropping emphasizes the center of interest, eliminates unnecessary areas, people, or distractions, and leaves space where its needed. It avoids chopping off body parts or pieces of objects at awkward points and does not force the image into an awkward shape just to fit the space. The center of interest in each photo is in focus. Photos have proper contrast, neither too light nor too dark. Color photos have accurate color values. Digital images should be free of distortion, not skewed or stretched. Special effects (cutouts, non-rectangular shapes, screens, tilts, color manipulation) are used sparingly and for a definite purpose. Photos should not be flipped because the resulting image is not an accurate one. In group photos, subjects are arranged in easily identifiable rows, all faces are easily recognizable, empty space is cropped out and distracting objects are absent. Images are not pixelated (bitmapped) due to low resolution or over-enlarging. Photos are free of digital noise (the appearance of grain). Portraits display uniformity in background, style and head size. Because of local policies and/or photographer arrangements, some schools might be unable to do this and should not be penalized. Posed shots such as environmental portraits, mug shots and cutouts may be used for emphasis and illustrative purposes. Individual photo credits recognize student photographers for their work. Photo illustrations are designated. Photos not taken by staff members should list proper source/credit. Unauthorized photos are not used.

Judges Comments on Photography

A. ComposiTion
Photos employ basic techniques such as framing, repetition, leading lines, simplicity and rule of thirds. Photos feature the action and emotion of the year rather than subjects posing for the camera. A clear center of interest is present, directing readers to the action. Photos have been cropped to remove extraneous space that does not contain meaningful content.

Strengths:

Good photo cropping. Excellent group shot arrangement. Photos showed subjects in action rather than something that was obviously posed.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

When selecting your dominant photos, always aim to select those that show action.

B. TeChniCAl quAliTy
Strengths:

Digital images contain sufficient resolution and are enlarged correctly. Photos from wet darkrooms, if used, are free from dust, scratches, lint and fingerprints.

Photos were focused.

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Part Five: PhOtOgraPhy

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

None - keep up the great work in selecting photos that displayed good technical aspects.

C. phoTo CoverAge

Photos from each topic represent multiple aspects rather than many shots from the same activity or event. Storytelling shots capture before, during and after shots to tell the full story. Photos reflect a balance of individual, medium and large-group shots without too many one-person images per spread. Each photo presents a new aspect or storytelling angle rather than multiple shots of the same idea or action.

Strengths:

Excellent how you included unposed photos of a variety of individuals rather than the same ones. Photos reflected a variety of events.

Weaknesses/Recommendations:

Remember that a dominant photo should be at least 2 1/2 times larger than subordinate photos on each spread. Some subordinate photos that appeared on the same spread were close to being the same size.

sCore for phoTogrAphy (use increments of 10)

Poor
[ ]

(100 maximum, see entry form completed by school)

DeDuction for non-StuDent Work: ToTAl poinTs:

________

300
Fair

Average

500

Very Good

800

Excellent

1000

________ 843

mArk of DisTinCTion (A mark of distinction is given by a judge or an NSPA official for exemplary work in this area. Cite reason below.)
For:

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DeaDline sCOring
_____ 75 _____ 125 _____ 200 Two or more preliminary deadlines set by publisher met (75 possible points) Final deadline set by publisher met. (125 possible points) TOTAL POINTS (200 possible)

total sCore
>
4,033

Marks of DistinCtion
[ ] [ ] [ ] [ ]

Concept/Essentials Coverage Design Writing/Editing Photography

JuDges summary COmments:

Congratulations on publishing a yearbook to be proud of! I thoroughly enjoyed reading and critiquing the 2013 TALON. You and your fine staff are gifted and knowledgeable. You especially excelled in coverage of various topics, photography techniques and theme continuity. The following are additional suggestions you may want to consider. 1. Eliminate all adjectives and adverbs from copy, such as "successful" (pages 14 and 60), "great" (page 60), "good" (page 65) and "priceless" (page 68). 2. Carefully proofread for minor errors, such as "theres no need to..." (page 119), "if your unimaginative" (page 119) and "its illegal" (page 119). 3. When writing sports copy (or any copy for that matter), avoid editorializing. Examples of sports editorializing are "one of the greatest feelings" (pages 128 and 130), "devastating loss" (page 130) and "determination led them" (page 130). 4. Carefully edit for apostrophe usage. On page 147, you should use "boys' basketball" in lieu of "boys basketball." On page 152, "girls' soccer" would be correct rather than"girls soccer." 5. It was great how in your group identifications, you placed the name of the group and row designations in bold. I recommend that you also follow the A. P. STYLE MANUAL rules of specifying FRONT ROW, SECOND ROW, THIRD ROW and BACK ROW. I wish you and your staff a productive and enjoyable academic year and the best ever TALON for 2014!

[ ]

honor rating
[ ]

All-American
3,700 or more points plus four or five Marks of Distinction

[ ] [ ]

First Class
3,700 or more points

Second Class
2,350-3,699 points

[ ]

Third Class
2,349 or fewer points

JuDge > M. Fortini

Scoresheet Copyright 2008

nATionAl sCholAsTiC press AssoCiATion

2221 University Ave SE Suite 121 Minneapolis, MN 55414 612-625-8335 info@studentpress.org nspa.studentpress.org

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