MENS

IMPACT
Its not just women
working for gender
equality
SPIRITUAL HUNGER
GRATITUDE, FAITH AND body image
Good Girls
Group combines fun, fundraising
LOST ART
HOW TO PUT GRATITUDE INTO WORDS
WINTER 2013-14
TWO WOMEN BOND OVER BEST GIFT TWOO WOMEN BONNDD OOVVER BEST GIFT
Isnt Enough
Thank You
When
CONTENTS
WINTER 2013-14 POWER OF GRATITUDE ISSUE
Magazine
When we give
cheerfully and
accept gratefully,
everyone is blessed.
~ Maya Angelou

WOMENS IMPACT | 3 WINTER 2013-14
Thank you
to our sponsors, advertisers,
volunteers and supporters for
making this magazine possible.
A portion of each ad purchased
goes directly to Womens Impact.
8Founders note
10Letter from Editor
12Womens Impact
18-year-old Nina Grollman
(PICTURED) follows her
dreams at Juilliard
16Handwritten Gratitude
Practice the fading art of a
personal thank-you note
18Energize your Body
Learn how ingratitude
toward your body creates
a cycle of shame
31Who We Are:
Join our Womens
Impact movement
30Community Impact
Good Girls Club uses
socializing to create
social change
28Empower your Mind
Put gratitude into practice
by embracing positive
psychology
26MENS IMPACT
Meet Pat Traynor,
whose positive energy
inspires others to
achieve their
goals of giving back
20Cover story
When thank you isnt enough;
One mom blessed by another with
the greatest gift.
32Global Connection
See how a local womans
passion in Peru starts
chain of empowerment
34Events
Make a difference
in your community
by supporting these
local fundraisers and
organizations
37Join Us
Come out and connect
at Womens Impacts
monthly Empower Hours
WINTER 2013-14 4 | WOMENS IMPACT WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN WINTER TER TER TER TER TER TER TER TER 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 2013 13 13 13 13 13 13 13- 13 14 4 14 14 14 14 14 14 14
38Voices
Susie Ekberg Risher
shares the power of
daily, written gratitude
CONTENTS
Elizabeth Jacobson
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Megan Havig works
with Womens Impact,
overseeing the website.
She also freelances as
a writer and marketing
specialist and loves
traveling, coffee and the
outdoors.
Mary Jo Hotzler,
who wrote the story
about the power of
positive psychology
(Page 28), is a wife,
mom and journalist liv-
ing In West Fargo, N.D.
By day, Hotzler is the
director of the Forum
News Service, a region-
al news wire service
provider in Fargo, N.D.
Jasmine Maki,
a writer living in Grand
Forks, N.D., focused on
the Good Girls Club
tor this issues Impact
the World feature. She
works for The Grand
Forks Herald as a fea-
tures reporter, covering
arts and entertainment
and life and style.
Tracy Briggs, digital
content development
director for Forum
Communications,
wrote about theology
professor Michelle
Lelwica, who studies the
connection between
faith, gratitude and body
image (Page 18). Briggs
lives in Moorhead with
her husband, Mark,
their two daughters,
Laura And Jordan, and
a dog who acts like Kim
Kardashian.
Meredith Holt,
who wrote the cover
story about a mom
whos forever grateful
to another mom
(Page 20), is a full-time
features reporter for
The Forum of Fargo-
Moorhead. She also
works part time at
the Crystal Corset
Bra Boutique, where
she helps women look
and feel better about
themselves. She lives in
Fargo with her nace
and two cats.
CONTRIBUTORS
WINTER 2013-14 6 | WOMENS IMPACT
Kady Nelson, RN; Cassi Garza, LPN; Breanna Mohagen, LPN
Were Growing and have
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Kirsten Stromsodt,
a journalist living in
Fargo, wrote this issues
Social Impact piece on
the power of a thank-
you note (Page16).
Stromsodt is the deputy
editor at The Forum of
Fargo-Moorhead. The
University of North
Dakota graduate grew
up in Mekinock, N.D.
When not working, she
enjoys watching her
friends cook, cheering on
the UND hockey teams,
traveling, and gardening
with her dad.
Carrie Snyder,
Womens Impact
Magazines photo
editor, works as a
full-time photographer
for The Forum of
Fargo-Moohread. She
grew up in Fargo and
attended Minnesota
State University
Moorhead for print
and photojournalism.
She is passionate about
photography, sports, the
outdoors and baking.
Nicole J. Phillips,
a former anchor for Fox
News In Fargo, wrote
about Nina Grollman,
an 18-year-old whos
following her dreams and
attending Juilliard with
the support of Womens
Impact (Page 12). Phillips
is an author, speaker and
mother of three kids. Shes
married to Bison Mens
Head Basketball Coach
Saul Phillips. Her column
Kindness is Contagious
runs every Saturday in
The Forum of Fargo-
Moorhead.
LaurelLee Loftsgard
contributes to
each issues Global
Inuence feature about
local women who are
making a difference
abroad (Page 32).
Loftsgard works as a
multimedia producer at
The Forum of Fargo-
Moorhead and hosts a
online entertainment
show, InforumTVs Star
Watch.
Nicole Welle, started
working with Womens
Impact over a year
ago. She works as a
freelance marketing and
branding expert and
is honing her skills as a
personal development
coach. Welle grew up
in small-town North
Dakota and lives in
Fargo with her husband,
Christopher, and two
sons.
CONTRIBUTORS
WOMENS IMPACT | 7 WINTER 2013-14
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Readers can reach
Chris Linnares at
chris@womensimpact.org

W
hat drives you to be so passionate about the
Womens Impact mission?
Thats what a friend asked me a few weeks ago
when I was talking about how much work we had been putting
into the magazine you are holding in your hands.
This is a question I believe we should ask ourselves once in a
while:
What truly drives me to wake up in the morning?
In my case, the answer was simple: selshness. I am a selsh
mom!
I want my daughters to live in a world where everyone
men and women have equal access to education, rights,
responsibilities and opportunities to become a force for good
for their families and communities.
Statistics show we have a lot of work to do to create a
more just and peaceful world. According to the Global Poverty
Project:
Women make up half of the worlds population and
represent 70 percent of the worlds poor.
Women work two-thirds of the worlds working hours and
produce half of the worlds food but earn only 10 percent of
the worlds income.
Initiatives all over the globe are taking steps toward improving
these statistics and proving that empowering women and
promoting gender equality is one of the most effective ways to
create a more balanced and prosperous world.
Gender equality is not only a basic human right, but its
achievement has enormous socio-economic ramications.
Empowering women fuels thriving economies, spurring
productivity and growth, declared the United Nations Entity
for Gender Equality and the Empowerment of Women.
At Womens Impact Community, we are blessed to see
women feeling empowered one support at a time.
In the past months, through one simple connection in
Womens Impact, Karin received the support of a mentor, Sarah
received nancial support to go to college and Pam received
winter clothes for her kids.
As I remember these inspiring stories, I feel a sense of hope
and immense gratitude for each volunteer who shares their
time, talent and love for this mission; for every person who
takes the time to visit our website and support a womans
life; and for the angels on Earth who bring healing to our
world. I also feel gratitude for God, my family and friends, who
empower me when I feel powerless.
As I am feeling a deep sense of gratitude, I am realizing
selshness was the wrong answer to what truly drives me to
wake up in the morning.
In the end, its one simple answer: Love.
FOUNDERS LETTER
WINTER 2013-14 8 | WOMENS IMPACT
Find what drives you
Chris Linnares
founder & president
Chris Linnares is an international author, psychotherapist and
founder of Womens Impact, formerly Diva Connection Foundation.
Originally from Brazil, she lives in Fargo with her daughter and
husband Bill Marcil Jr., publisher of The Forum of Fargo-Moorhead.
For more information on
Womens Impacts new
website and mission, turn to
Page 31.
Gratitude comes in
many forms
T
he legal pads full of lists and stacks of color-coded
folders speak to my need as an editor for strict
planning and organizing. Were always on a deadline,
and its up to me to ensure we meet it.
Getting a late-night call from your magazines founder just
a week before copy deadline is enough to freak out even the
most seasoned editor.
As Chris Linnares hurriedly explained that Diva Connections
website had been hacked and was now directing viewers to
an online pornography site, my heart sank deeper. Talk about a
defeating moment for an organization devoted to empowering
women.
But my negative feelings soon turned toward gratitude as our
nonprot used this irritating incident to re-evaluate our mission
and image.
In the end, we decided to scrap the website entirely and
start fresh. That decision brought a new name that spoke more
directly to what we are about: impacting women. Gone were
the confused looks when we tried to explain the unknown but
empowering denition behind our diva-licious name.
We also ushered in a streamlined objective for Womens
Impact Magazine. Within these pages, youll nd stories to
inspire, news to empower and ideas to impact.
During the holiday season, were all talking about what were
thankful for. As funny as it may sound, it turns out Womens
Impact can count hackers as our blessing in disguise this year.
Our trials as an organization are small compared to those of
the women we feature in this issue, who all have much deeper
understandings of what gratitude means.
We hope their stories inspire you to look for the people,
opportunities and moments in your own life for which you can
give thanks.
Heidi Shaffer works as the features editor at The Forum of Fargo-
Moorhead. She joined Womens Impact in 2012 because of a desire
to encourage and educate women to reach their full potential.
Shaffer lives in Fargo with her husband. Readers can reach her at
info@womensimpact.org.
WINTER 2013-14 10 | WOMENS IMPACT
Heidi Shaffer
Editor
LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
I
work with so
many beautiful
women who
sometimes need
help and dont
know where to
turn. Womens
Impact for them
has been a
resource, it has
been a sign of
hope.
local nonprot
B
eing a young
mom in a
town away from
your family can be
really hard. Thanks
to Womens
Impact I made new
friends for both my
son and myself.
Samantha
I
saw the link and
oh my gosh!
This magazine is
amazing and so
inspiring. I hope
that you and
the magazine
succeeds!
Anna George,
Dubuque, Iowa
I
m incredibly
proud of Chris
Linnares Marcil,
Heidi Shaffer,
Nicole Locy Phillips
& the rest of the
amazing ladies
who launched
this inuential
magazine.
Stephanie Goetz,
executive director
of the Stephanie
Goetz Foundation

I I
work with so work with so
many beautiful many beautiful
women who women w
sometimes need sometimes need
help and dont help and
B B
town town
your your
really rea

I I
m incredibly m incredibly
proud of Chris proud of Chris
Linnares Marcil, Linnares Marcil,
Heidi Shaffer, eidi Sha
Nicole Locy Phillips Nicole Locy Phillips
& the rest of the & the rest of the

Tell us how Womens Impacts mission

has affected your life. Connect with us at:
info@womensimpact.org
twitter.com/WomensImpact
facebook.com/WomensImpact
FEEDBACK
WOMENS IMPACT | 11 WINTER 2013-14
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N
ina Grollman looks
out the window
and wonders how
she ever got to this place.
She is 18 years old, living
in New York City and is
nishing her rst semes-
ter studying drama at The
Juilliard School.
Nina is well on her way
to seeing her dreams
come to fruition, but a
very short time ago, those
dreams teetered as Nina
realized her fantasy was in
a head-on collision with her
nances.
Just last year, Nina was
like many other seniors at
Moorhead High School,
anxiously waiting to hear
if she would get into her
school of choice. The
dream was so big and
the stakes were so high,
she didnt even tell many
friends she had applied
to the prestigious music,
dance and drama college.
The application process
was arduous, beginning
with a written essay and
continuing with a trip to
Chicago for a live audition.
Nina scrambled to rear-
range her travel plans when
she was immediately called
back for a second audition.
Only two girls were asked
to stay.
She wasnt done proving
herself yet. Nina was one
of 40 students from across
the nation invited to a nal
audition in New York City.
Juilliard accepted 18 peo-
ple, and Nina Grollman was
one of them.
Nina says her parents
have been incredibly sup-
portive and have worked
as hard as possible to nd
a way to help Nina pay for
the school, but after many
family conversations about
nances, they just couldnt
gure out how to come
up with the $55,000-a-year
tuition.
Why not just take out
student loans and worry
about it later? Nina says
she knows she is going into
a high-risk eld. She could
nish her schooling and still
end up without a job. Nina,
who sings, writes music and
plays the piano, ukulele,
guitar, melodica, violin and
a bit of the accordion, says
starting life after college
with more than $200,000
in student loans would
have felt irresponsible un-
less she were going into a
eld with more stability.
She heard about Wom-
ens Impact from a friend
and decided to post her
need. She thought maybe
she could earn extra mon-
ey by performing around
town.
Along with friend and
musical partner Izzy Marcil
(founder Chris Linnares
stepdaughter), Nina ended
up donating her talents to
the organizations magazine
launch party in May.
(continued on Page 14)
WOMENS IMPACT
Achieving
dreams
Funds raised through
Womens Impact help
teen attend Juilliard
By Nicole Phillips
n process
as arduous, beginning
with a written essay and
continuing with a trip to
Chicago for a live audition.
Nina scrambled to rear-
range her travel plans when
she was immediately called
bba ba back ck ck ck ffffor or oo a second audition.
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to to to to ssssta ta ta tay. y. y. y.
She wasn nnnt t t t ddddon on on oneeee pr pr pr prov ov ov ovin in ing ggg
he he he hers rs rs rsel el el elff f f ye ye ye yet. t. t. t. NNNNina wa wa a wassss on ooo e
of 40 studen nnts ts ts ts ffffro ro ro rommmm ac ac ac acro ro ro ross ss ss ss
th th th theee e na na na nati ti ti tion on on on iiinv nv nv vit ttted to a a aa nal
audition in Ne eeewwww Yo Yo Yo York rk rk rk CCCCit ttty. yy. y.
JJuil il iilli lli liar ar ar ardd dd ac ac ac acce ce ce ce t pt d ed dd 18 peo- o- o-
ple, and NNNNina Gr rrr ll ollm lm lm lmaaan a wwwwas as as as
one of themmmm.
Nina says her pare eeent nt nt ntssss
have been incredibly sup-
portive and have worked
end
ded to post her
need. She thought maybe
she could earn extra mon-
ey by performing around
town.
Along with friend and
musical partner Izzy Marcil
(founder Chris Linnares
stepdaughter), Nina ended
up up up up ddddoonating her talents to
the organizations magazine
launch party in May.
(continued on Pa
To nd out how to
help another woman
in need, visit
WomensImpact.org.
WINTER 2013-14 12 | WOMENS IMPACT
Nina Grollman sings, writes music
and plays the piano, ukulele, guitar,
melodica, violin and a bit of the
accordion.
Thanks to all
giving hearts!
Giving Hearts Day 2014
is Thursday, February 13
Thank you to everyone who gives on Giving Hearts Day. Your generosity supports
the missions of nearly 180 charitable causes in the region. We are already gearing
up and expect more than 200 non profits to join this years event!
Thanks to your 24 hours of giving, area nonprofit organizations are at work 365 days
a year to provide shelter, food, education, arts, camp experiences, medical care and
so much more to create tremendous quality of life in this region.
$3.68 million generously given this year
Total donations 16,951
Given each minute $1,862
Most donations given by a single donor 33
Average donation amount $157
Donors who give to more than one charity 34%
Please get involved and learn more
about the charities of our region
impactgiveback.org
Dakota Medical Foundation and Impact Foundation support the website www.impactgiveback.org, which 500+ nonprofits
use to tell their stories to over 60,000 annual site visitors. The website accepts online donations and lists volunteer opportunities.
More than $8 million has been donated at the site since 2008 and more than 50,500 volunteer hours have been recorded.
Phone: 701-235-EYES(3937)
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(continued from page 12)
The young women wrote a song
about the impact one life can have on
another, and then Nina sat stunned as
she watched the effects unfold in her
own life.
People at the party were so touched
by Ninas talent and ambition that they
wanted to help her get to Juilliard. Nina
was presented with a stack of envelopes
totaling nearly $1,200 from men and
women in the audience.
Nina wants to say thank you and to let
people know the impact of their gener-
osity.
Nina says, The best gift I can give now
is sharing music. I hope to continue to
do that and then share what Ive learned
here at school with other women... I
cant believe that its real, that Im here,
and all my dreams are coming true!
WOMENS IMPACT
WINTER 2013-14 14 | WOMENS IMPACT
Nina Grollman, left, performs with Izzy Marcil
at a Womens Impact event in May 2013.
Photo by David Samson
Help a woman like
Nina right now by logging
on to our Womens
Impact online community.
To get started, go to
www.womensimpact.org
and create a prole, kind
of like what you make for
a social networking site.
See what needs
women have by checking
out our activity feed on
the website. You can
interact with women and
nd wasy to support
them.
Our Womens Impact
Online Community
works like a specialized
social network but feels
like an online family.
Give help, post a need
If you have a need,
dont be shy. Post needs
on the feed and connect
with other women who
can help.
Have fun and engage.
You will nd yourself
connected, empowered
and will have a positive
impact on a life.
Support a woman like Nina today ...
Nina Grollman graduated in 2013 from Moorhead High School
and is attending Juilliard with the support of Womens Impact.
Fine other women looking for connection at
www.womensimpact.org
WOMENS IMPACT
WOMENS IMPACT | 15 WINTER 2013-14
B
ill, bill, junk mail,
bill, pizza coupon
wait, whats
this? A 3-by-4-inch
colored envelope, hand
addressed.
In an age when texts
are replacing phone
calls and emails are
replacing hand-written
letters, the thank-you
note has become an
overlooked way to
show gratitude.
The big thing is
people dont get
much special in the
mail, said Melissa
Schmalenberger, a
Fargo, N.D.-based
professional personal
organizer.
To get a
handwritten note
in the mail really
shows you care about
someone.
Schmalenberger, who
keeps Melissas Happy
File full of thank-you
cards and notes, said
getting a thank-you
note is oftentimes
more satisfying than
getting a gift.
If people can
understand how
powerful it is, theyd do
it more. The art of a
handwritten letter it
just reaches your soul,
she says.
Minneapolis-
based artist Michelle
Brusegaard has been
designing cards for
about seven years and
says thank-you notes
are the most popular
of her designs.
Theres just
something so much
more special about a
physical object, she
said.
You can hold it in
your hand, post it on
your fridge or stumble
across it years later in a
pile and your heart
gets warm all over
again.
Brusegaard said she
tries to be specic in
her notes, including
details of the gift,
help given or why
the person being
important to her.
If you feel thankful,
you should send a card.
Even the smallest acts
quantify a card, in my
opinion, Brusegaard
said.
Mainly because, well,
walking out to your
mailbox and nding
a handwritten card
in a mess of bills and
oil-change coupons is
pretty fantastic.
SOCIAL IMPACT
&
Handwritten Heartfelt
By Kirsten Stromsodt
Photo by Carrie Snyder
THANK-YOU NOTES A TANGIBLE WAY TO SHOW GRATITUDE
WINTER 2013-14
Sc Schm hmal alen enbe berg rg ger er, wh w
16 | WOMENS IMPACT
Tips for writing and
sending thank-you notes
Make it heartfelt.
Talk about what the gift meant to you.
Compliment the person.
(I love your taste, and getting a
gift from you was fantastic.)
Dont just send a note for gifts.
It can be for any random act of kindness or just
because youre grateful tohave them in your life.
Its never too late.
A late note at least acknowledges the
act and lets people know you received the gift.
Source: Melissa Schmalenberger
Michelle Brusegaardd
Unglued
408 Broadway
Fargo, N.D.
The Third
Street Gallery
310 Kittson Ave.
Grand Forks, N.D.
ACO
303 E. Main Ave.
Bismarck, N.D.
i like you
501 1st Ave. NE,
Minneapolis, Minn.
Paper Hat
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Minneapolis
Digs
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Minneapolis
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White Bear Lake,
Minn.
swag
423 Division St. S.
Northeld, Minn.
Yellow Umbrella
204 3rd St. NW
Bemidji, Minn.
Buy Michelle Brusegaards cards at:
WOMENS IMPACT | 17 WINTER 2013-14
SOCIAL IMPACT
By Tracy Briggs
ENERGIZE YOUR BODY
SPIRITUAL
HUNGER
18 | WOMENS IMPACT
P
rofessor Michelle Lelwica
is not alone today in her
ofce at Concordia College
in Moorhead. Her dog Buck is
sprawled out on the oor behind
her, soaking up the sun streaming
through the window. Buck seems
utterly unimpressed that hes
sharing an ofce with a woman
who is setting out to change the
world.
Lelwicas second book, The
Religion of Thinness: Satisfying
the Spiritual Hungers Behind
Womens Obsession with Food
and Weight, examines how
women devote time, money and
energy to achieving a slender
body and how idealized images
of women lead females of all ages
into a cycle of guilt and shame.
She knows because shes lived
it, rst as a 9-year-old who felt
different because she was chubby
and next as a young teen in the
late 1970s feeling bad because
she didnt look like Farrah Fawcett.
I grew up thinking, Whats
wrong with me? says Lelwica,
the chairwoman of Concordias
religion department who earned
a doctorate in theology from
Harvards Divinity School.
By the time she was 14, Lelwica
tried starving herself and later
learned about bulimia with her
cheerleading squad in the school
bathroom.
We had never heard the word
bulimia before. We just talked
about how you could lose weight
by throwing up after meals, she
says.
Lelwica says she started forcing
herself to throw up nearly every
night after dinner. She wasnt
losing much weight, so no one
suspected anything was wrong.
But after three years she started
to get scared.
I wasnt getting my period, my
teeth were rotting, I had cavities,
and my hair was starting to fall
out. I knew I was in trouble, she
says.
By the time she went to college
at St. Benedicts Monastery in St.
Joseph, Minn., she had overcome
her bulimia and started to see
things in a whole new light.
She studied how religion has
painted womens bodies in shame
since Eve. It was Eves unruly
eating that lead to humanitys
fall from grace. Much like Eve
tempted Adam, women still
accept that their path to self-
worth is based on men nding
their bodies desirable.
Many women today have
the same severe self-discipline
that some early Christians had,
Lelwica says. When they deprive
themselves of food, they feel a
sense of redemption and self-
worth. Control becomes holy.
We even base our morality
on calories, she says. We call
ourselves good if weve eaten
something low-fat and sinful
if we indulge in cheesecake.We
live our lives devoted not to a
higher being, but to our mission to
transform our physical bodies to
perfection. Women take their cues
from media and their message is
WINTER 2013-14

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Tips to a
Grateful Body
1. Become a
cultural critic.
Dont accept media
images with blind faith.
Understand that picture
you see on a magazine
cover is not real. As
supermodel Cindy
Crawford once said, I
wish I looked like Cindy
Crawford. Real beauty
is the women we see
everyday in real life.
2. Surround yourself
with supportive
friends.
Talk about your
concerns with body
image and know
youre not alone. But
try not to immerse
yourself in negativity,
which tends to breed
more negativity. If your
friends constantly put
themselves down,
you are more likely to
join in. Find positive
friends who share your
interests beyond caloric
intake.
3. Listen to your
body and give it
what it needs.
You are more in tune
with your body than
you might think. Take
the time to listen to
it. Rest if youre tired,
drink if youre thirsty.
And if your body
wishes to have a
chocolate chip cookie,
have it. Sometimes
giving in to indulgences
is great for the spirit.
4. Remember little
eyes are watching.
Although you might
be inclined to nitpick
yourself as you look in
the mirror, remember
the next generation of
women is watching and
listening. After all, didnt
we learn about dieting
from our mothers?
We were confused
when we heard her
criticize herself because
we thought she was
beautiful. Stop the
vicious cycle of negative
talk.
5. Fake it till you
make it.
When that little voice
in your head says
something negative,
tell it to sit down and
shut up. Say something
positive instead. You
might not believe it at
rst, but eventually you
will start to internalize
the positive messages
coming out of your
mouth.
5
clear: if youre a woman,
its your appearance that
matters most.
Political pundits spend
time on cable news
shows discussing ways
Hillary Clinton could
improve her looks
and whether Michelle
Obama should show
her bare arms. Would
they ever talk about
their husbands in this
way?
Be mindful in
how you live, she
encourages. Practice
accepting yourself the
way you are, talk to
supportive friends, and
start noticing media
portrayals of women
that you normally take
for granted.
More than anything,
I wish I could give my
students the ability
to love and accept
themselves, she says. I
dont know how we can
talk about getting peace
in the world when we
continue to be at war
with our own bodies.
ENERGIZE YOUR BODY
Source:
Michelle Lelwica
areer
WOMENS IMPACT | 19 WINTER 2013-14
F
ARGO, N.D. Jackson
Harmon took a detour
when he came into the
world. After back fusion surgery
and massive blood clotting in
2007 and 2008, it became clear
that Allison Harmon couldnt risk
pregnancy.
Her internal medicine doctor,
interventional radiologist,
hematologist, OB-GYN and
fertility specialist all agreed she
shouldnt carry a child.
But shed always wanted
kids, so she and husband Dave
started looking at other options.
I knew I wanted to be a
mom, and however I could be a
mom, thats how it was supposed
to be, she says.
The 32-year-old Fargo
woman was open to adoption
but wanted to try to have a
biological child via a gestational
carrier rst.
So then came the question of
who how do you ask someone
if they would carry your child
for you? The answer came in a
woman named Peggy Harter, just
a year older than Allison and also
living in Fargo.
After a series of almost
meetings, they nally met face to
face over dinner.
The two quickly clicked. The
more they talked, the closer they
grew and began establishing trust.
From Day One, everything,
every step of the way was
denitely from the Lord, and
because it was from the Lord,
I was able to relinquish trust,
Allison says.
Questions
Peggy had one thing on her
bucket list: to give someone else
a child.
I think it was a bit of my
purpose, she says.
(continued on Page 22)
COVER STORY
The best gift ever
Gestational carrier helped give Fargo couple the baby they wanted
Story by Meredith Holt
Photos by Carrie Snyder
WINTER 2013-14 20 | WOMENS IMPACT
Isnt Enough
Thank You
When
COVER STORY COVER STORY
WOMENS IMPACT | 21 WINTER 2013-14
From left: Allison, Jackson and
Dave Harmon, Gracie, Andy
and Peggy Harter. In front:
Lance Harter.
COVER STORY
(continued from Page 20)
I think it was her purpose,
Allison adds. I dont think you
could have planned out any
better how this could have
gone.
The seed was rst planted in
Peggys brain when she found
herself in a waiting room sitting
next to a woman whod
given birth to 10 babies for ve
different families.
Unlike a surrogate mother,
who donates her own egg
and uterus to create a child,
a gestational carrier has no
biological link to the baby. The
egg and sperm of the parents
are fertilized in-vitro in a lab
and then transferred to the
carriers uterus for pregnancy
and delivery.
The two women, both
pregnant at the time, talked
about the process while they
waited for their gestational
diabetes test results.
Then came the birth of Peggys
second child, her now 6-year-old-
son, Lance.
When my son was born, his
birth went really quickly. I mean,
I was probably in labor that I
actually felt for like 25 minutes
and pushed for like four minutes,
and the doctor who delivered
him said, You do know its not
this easy for everybody else?
You should consider doing this
professionally! she says.
The subject came up again
at her daughters gymnastics
class, where Peggy struck up
a conversation with another
woman, this time a mother
whod used a gestational carrier.
She was telling me about
how she was having a baby in
two weeks, but she was very
thin. I looked at her and said,
Not to be Captain Obvious, but
you sure dont look like youre
eight and a half months pregnant,
she says.
This woman, who couldnt
carry her second and third
babies because shed had heart
failure with her rst, mentioned
shed heard of a couple who
were in a similar situation.
That was Dave and Allison
Harmon.
But it wasnt until a personal
trainer facilitated a phone
number exchange that the two
women got connected.
Allison made the call.
I think you said that you
might want to carry my baby?
she asked Peggy.
Gratitude
A 2010 report from the
Council for Responsible Genetics
says statistics on the prevalence
of surrogacy and gestational
carriers in the U.S. are hard to
come by.
But data from the Centers for
Disease Control and Prevention
and the Society for Assisted
Reproductive Technology (SART)
show the number of babies born
to gestational carriers nearly
doubled from 2004 to 2008.
These numbers, while only
skimming the surface of the
entire surrogacy market, will
surely continue to rise, the
council writes.
And although at this point,
Peggys not planning to do it
again, she encourages anyone
else whos considering surrogacy
to look into it.
When she told her husband
she wanted to do it, He just
was kind of quiet because he
is kind of quiet and he said, I
think that if we couldnt have had
our own kids, its something we
might have tried, she says.
Dave and Allison do hope to
have another baby via gestational
carrier.
I pray that its with (Peggy),
but if its not, God will bring
somebody else into our lives,
she says.
No matter what the future
holds for the couple, Allisons
(continued on Page 24)
WINTER 2013-14 22 | WOMENS IMPACT
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COVER STORY
WOMENS IMPACT | 23 WINTER 2013-14
Gracie Harter, 9, plays with Jackson Harmon, 1, in the Harters Fargo
home while dads Dave Harmon, left, and Andy Harter look on.
COVER STORY
(continued from Page 22)
well aware of and grateful for the
commitment her gestational carrier made.
I mean, how do you (express gratitude)?
You gave me the best gift ever, she says to
Peggy.
Not only did the Harters get the baby they
wanted, but they also gained a second family.
Our families are super close, Allison says.
Shes Auntie Peggy and her husbands Uncle
Andy. Their kids love Jackson and Jackson
adores them.
At rst, Peggy was a little worried about
how shed handle handing over the baby she
carried for nine months.
I never, ever had any issues going into it,
but you cant predict how youre going to feel
when youre pregnant with somebody elses
baby, she says.
It helped to see the Harmons regularly, as
a reminder of what she was doing and for
whom, and to watch their excitement for
their new addition grow.
Moments
Peggys nine-month moment came after
baby Jackson was born in a room full of
family members and hospital staff.
The look on Allisons face when she held
him for the rst time said it all.
A nurse was standing in front of me, and
I tapped her on the shoulder. Im like, Youre
ruining my moment, could you move? Peggy
says with a laugh.
That moment didnt come without trial.
Before she moved forward with the
pregnancy, Peggy wanted to make sure her
children were OK with it. She explained the
process in kid-friendly terms and patiently
answered their questions.
Gracie, now 8, said, Well, that makes
perfect sense.
Lance, however, had a different response.
My son goes it was such a guy answer
he goes, I dont get it, can I have a fruit snack?
Peggy says.
Explaining the circumstances of her
pregnancy wasnt as easy with adults. At the
time, she joked that she was going to make a
brochure about it.
WINTER 2013-14 24 | WOMENS IMPACT
Dave Harmon cuddles his son, 1-year-
old Jackson, in the Harters' Fargo home.
Sometimes when people
would be like, Oh, youre having
a baby? Congratulations! I would
just say, Oh, well thank you
because I didnt want to explain
it to everybody, she says.
And if anyone questioned
Peggys decision to help the
Harmons, she had a response
ready.
We have the technology to
ght heart disease and cancer
now, why cant we use the same
technology to help a loving
couple have their own baby?
Adds Allison: God created
a way for it to happen. It just
didnt happen the way it does for
almost everyone else.
WOMENS IMPACT | 25 WINTER 2013-14
COVER STORY
Jackson Harmon, 1, plays
with the Harters dog in
their Fargo home.
T
his quote by the famous
Beatles member could
describe as the mission of
Womens Impact.
The beginning of our mission
started with one simple dream
support a friend who was going
through a really hard time with
her divorce.
She lost her marriage and
home, with no family or nancial
support, she ended up living with
us. After emailing friends, asking if
someone knew of a lawyer who
would support her in this difcult
journey, we were oored by the
amount of feedback we received.
Our friends emailed their friends
who called their friends, and
people we didnt even know
were offering their support.
I started dreaming about an
online community where women
could ask for the support
they needed to feel more
empowered in their journey.
I started sharing this idea with
others, not knowing if it would
actually happen.
On this path, I was blessed
to come across an inspiring
man who generously
showed us the way to make
this dream come true: Pat
Traynor an enthusiastic and
passionate advocate for health
and empowerment in our
community.
Traynor serves as the
president of Dakota Medical
Foundation and the executive
director of Impact Foundation.
He and his powerful team have
been the driving force behind
the mission of many local
nonprots.
When I shared with Traynor
the idea of a website to increase
MENS IMPACT
Pat Traynor
A FORCE FOR
GOOD IN OUR
COMMUNITY
By Chris Linnares, Womens Impact founder
To learn more about
the Dakota Medical
Foundation and Impact
Foundation, visit
www.dakmed.org. and
www.impactgiveback.org.
A dream you dream alone is only
a dream. A dream you dream
together is reality.
John Lennon
WINTER 2013-14 26 | WOMENS IMPACT
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female support systems, I was
afraid of his reaction.
In our conversation, instead
of limitations and a reality check,
I received an explosion of
encouragement, inspiration and
all the support needed to bring
the Womens Impact mission to
life.
Stories like ours happen
every week in Traynors ofce.
As you connect with Pat
Traynors enthusiasm and
wisdom, I hope you will feel even
more inspire to dream and put
your passion into action.
In case you feel insecure
about it, remember that the best
way to overcome the bumps
and potholes of self-doubt and
fear is allowing your dreams to
y!
What is the role of the
Dakota Medical Foundation
and Impact Foundation in our
community?
Id say their role is to
dramatically improve health and
access to those who dont have
access to care, with a special
emphasis on childrens health.
And, really, what we do is we
help build and support nonprot
organizations to help them
produce exceptional results.
We help them reach their full
potential to serve, to provide
leadership and fundraising
training.
We call it a leverage strategy.
So rather than just handing
out dollars as a foundation,
what were doing is providing
dollars, too, but were helping
them become extraordinary at
producing results.
We love it because its really
working through and with others
that are doing the great work in
the community. Its fun because
were celebrating others success.
What attracted you to
Womens Impact?
The energy and enthusiasm is
certainly a draw, and the cause
of helping women reach their
full potential, I think that thats an
incredible mission and is needed
and valuable.
The idea of connecting
women with resources
and other women, experts,
professionals and people who
care is needed and necessary.
The fact that its becoming viral
is necessary. People want to be a
part of that.
what was the most
challenging moment you
needed to overcome?
One of the biggest challenges
is learning how to be a great
dad.
You want to provide
everything you possibly can for
your children but not so much
where they dont learn value,
work ethic and giving back. If
you hand someone everything,
they never learn or are given the
opportunity.
Creating wonderful
opportunities but not giving
them so much, it can become
harmful to their self esteem, to
their future and their drive and
value system.
You dont want your kid to be
like you, you want them to be
like themselves and reach their
full potential, and thats the crux
of the challenge.
Im blessed with three
wonderful boys and am learning
every day.
What empowered you to
overcome those moments?
Being surrounded by great
people has empowered me. I
have a wonderful wife and folks
growing up.
They provided such a great
base because theyre great
parents, and my wife is such a
wonderful person.
Its all different than when we
were kids. Many of the pressures
are different.
Ive got great friends and
people I work with. Theyre
excellent parents that serve as
role models that help my wife
and I.
Thats been a real blessing, to
be around people who have been
through some of the same things.
(Continues on Page 36)
MENS IMPACT
WOMENS IMPACT | 27 WINTER 2013-14
EMPOWER YOUR MIND
gratitude
Happiness often found
once you look within
using positive psychology
Story by Mary Jo Hotzler
Photo by Carrie Snyder
WINTER 2013-14 28 | WOMENS IMPACT
A
t 40 years old and on
her fourth post-college
job, Jodee Bock found
herself restless.
It wasnt the rst time she
had felt this way. Previous
jobs all eventually brought
on the same response, and
Bock was blaming others
for her dissatisfaction. It was
always someone else creating
the issues and someone else
causing the stress, she recalls.
She began soul searching, and
before long it hit her: the ah-ha
moment.
I thought about it and
realized the only thing they all
(jobs) had in common was me,
she says.
This was exactly one decade
ago.From then on, Bock was
committed to changing her way
of thinking.
That meant looking for the
positive in all that life tossed her
way. It meant being authentic
and true to herself at every
opportunity. And it meant being
at peace with what she had
and nding ways to practice
gratitude in her daily life.
The last 10 years have been
amazing, says Bock, now CEO
of Keller-Williams Realty and
owner of Bocks Ofce and
Transformational Consulting.
I really do have the ability to
make a difference in my own
life. Im immensely more happy
now.
EMPOWERING YOUR
MIND, BODY
Science has proven time and
again the power of positive
thinking in improving health,
happiness and overall well-being.
This concept is often referred
to as positive psychology.
According to research by
Robert Emmons, a psychology
Practicing
Jodee Bock, CEO and Team Leader for Keller
Williams, Roers Realty in Fargo, N.D.
professor at University of
California Davis, thinking
grateful thoughts on a regular
basis can
increase
happiness
by as
much
as 25
percent,
while
keeping a gratitude journal for
as little as three weeks results in
better sleep and more energy.
Emmons, widely considered
a top authority on the scientic
study of gratitude, writes about
this in his book, Thanks! How
Practicing Gratitude Can Make
You Happier.
Fargo psychologist Jay Phillippi
echoes Emmons research.
Phillippi, who was a longtime
Moorhead police ofcer before
becoming a psychologist, has
centered his practice Positive
Psychological Initiatives (PPI
Consulting) around this
mindset.
By expressing gratitude, we
removes our ability to feel
disgruntled or upset, Phillippi
explains. Both cant be possible
at the same time, and it takes
no more energy to be positive.
Phillippi offers this challenge:
When someone asks you how
you are doing, instead of just
saying ne or nodding your
head and moving on, instead
say, Im doing well. Thanks for
asking.
That last part the thanks
for asking is gratitude.
Try it once. Youll be
surprised at how people
respond, he says.
Its not just your mental
health that can benet from
positive thinking and an attitude
of gratitude.
The science behind stress
and physical problems is well-
documented, Phillippi said.
The Centers for Disease
Control notes that 90 percent
of all doctor visits in the United
States are related to stress or a
stress-related illness.
Healthy thoughts, a positive
outlook these destroy the
ability for stress to have a lasting,
long impact, Phillippi says. Our
bodies possess natural ability to
heal, but the conditions have to
be optimal.
WRITING
IT ALL DOWN
Its never too late to start
changing the way you approach
life, Bock said.
The rst step is simply being
aware.
Its also important, according
to Bock, to really think about
gratitude as a mindset.
Gratitude is a state of being.
It doesnt require something
to have happened, she said.
To me, its different than
thankfulness. Thats really more
of a reaction to something.
Experts and gratitude
devotees alike suggest
journaling as one of the best
ways to get your mind moving
in a positive direction. Emmons
research shows that translating
thoughts into concrete language
deepens their emotional impact
and has advantages over just
thinking the thoughts.
Phillippi also believes
journaling can be a powerful
tool to help people see the
good.
Bad things do still happen,
Phillippi says. But there are a lot
of things that are still positive
and valuable in our lives.
EMPOWER YOUR MIND
WOMENS IMPACT | 29 WINTER 2013-14
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COMMUNITY IMPACT
I
t started as a casual
conversation last August
between three friends who
were all looking to give back to
their community.
Now the Good Girls Club,
located out of Grand Forks,
N.D., is a full-blown non-prot
organization with more than 70
members.
Mary Fox, Erinn Hakstol and
Nicole Fournier started the
Good Girls Club as a way to
bring their girlfriends together
for a night out that would
benet their community.
Each month through a
simple group text message or
phone call, the three board
members pick an individual
or organization theyd like to
benet and decide how they
can do so. Sometimes its a
simple monetary gift. Other
times, its collecting specic
items of need.
We have no rules, said Fox.
We just pick any organization
and run with it.
Thats the best part, Hakstol
added.
So far, the group has worked
with foster care programs and
homeless shelters to collect
items of need, such as blankets
and nightlights. Theyve also
collected various gift cards to
give to cancer patients and
monetary donations for families
whove lost loved ones.
Their biggest impact so
far came in January at the
Grand Forks Downtown
Fashion Night, a style show
and shopping event. The group
raised nearly $9,000 for Altrus
Infant Bereavement Program.
But for the most part, the
Good Girls keep it simple.
Once the group decides on a
project, they schedule a night
out at an area restaurant and
send informal invitations to
their members via Facebook,
text messages and word of
mouth.
The only thing that we
require is that you bring
something for whatever is the
charity that night, Fox said,
adding that she uses the word
require loosely because they
dont want to exclude anyone.
Sometimes 40 or 50 people
will show up; other times
theres only 10 or 15.
Theres no pressure,
Hakstol said. Thats the beauty
of it.
Combining the three Cs
charity, chatting and cocktails
the women have an enjoyable,
guilt-free night out while helping
their community.
Were like Cheers! We did
something good, Hakstol said.
They love their guilt-free
nights out, but they said
delivering the donations to the
organizations is their favorite
part.
Once we drop off that
donation, were like OK, Im
ready to do the next one, Fox
said. You get a giving high.
The ladies said their hope
is that women in other
communities will pick up on the
idea and start their own Good
Girls Club.
You can do it in conjunction
with anything, Hakstol said. Its
so easy.
Story and photos by Jasmine Maki
D
O
I
N
G
Girls Good
Grand Forks club combines
fun with fundraising
We have no
rules, said Fox.
We just pick
any organization
and run with it.
To learn more about
the Good Girls Club
and how to help, visit
their Facebook page
or call Erinn Hakstol at
(218) 791-3679.
WINTER 2013-14
TTha hatt ss th thee be best st pppar art, t
30 | WOMENS IMPACT
Erinn Hakstol, from left, Mary Fox and Nicole Fournier started the Good Girls Club in Grand Forks, N.D.
WHO
WE ARE
C
hris Linnares, founder
of Womens Impact,
is passionate about
connections for change. Eight
years ago, she found herself
thousands of miles away from her
homeland of Brazil without any
way to make Fargo home. She
had no one to call for a laugh or
for help. Yet, someone reached
out to her in a time of need.
The lasting effect was powerful.
Womens Impacts mission is to
empower women so they can
become a force to impact their
lives, their community and the
world.
Through one connection,
a womans life can change.
Interested in impacting lives through Womens Impact? Email us at info@womensimpact.org and join our movement today.
We rock our
mission in
three ways:
1 Increase womens
support systems through
connections.
WOMENS IMPACT ONLINE
COMMUNITY
Join our online community,
where you can impact a
womans life! Create a prole
and view our Womens
Support List, where you
can post needs you have or
support a woman in need.
LOCAL MONTHLY EVENTS
Get your babysitter lined up
for this empowering monthly
event! On the rst Tuesday
of each month we host our
WOMENS EMPOWER
HOUR for women to make
meaningful connections.
We offer free appetizers,
an inspiring talk and a table
for them to share their
own promotional materials,
business cards or mission
they are passionate about.
2 Share
valuable insight with
women so that they can
impact their health, life
and the world.
FRESH BLOGS ON OUR
WEBSITE
Receive a fresh dose of
inspiration from our website.
Watch for our tidbits of
wisdom from women in the
areas on health, work and life
through our bloggitos (brief
blogs for the busy life) on our
website. These mini blogs will
refresh and inspire you and
impact your health, life and
work.
WOMENS IMPACT
MAGAZINE
Flip open our magazine to
read stories that inspire,
news that empowers and
ideas that impact women.
3 Create opportunities
for women to impact the
world.
IMPACT THE WORLD
Discover organizations near
you through our national
listing located on the website
and nd out where you can
serve others in need.
WOMENS IMPACT | 31 WINTER 2013-14
R001986458
redrivervalley@dressforsuccess.org
Fargo Boutique
502 1st Ave. N | Lower Level | Fargo, ND 58102
701-478-8076
Hawley Boutique
421-5th St. | PO Box 237 | Hawley, MN 56549
218-483-3145
The mission of Dress for Success Red River Valley of the Upper Midwest is to promote the economic
independence of disadvantaged women by providing professional attire, a network of support, and the
career development tools to help women thrive in work and in life.
Women are referred to us from over 40 different referral agencies
throughout Eastern ND and NW MN.
Each woman meets with a personal shopper who provides them with professional attire and acces-
sories from the Boutique to wear to her interview or job, along with the boost of condence neces-
sary to provide a solid rst impression.
Join us for an OPEN HOUSE at our FARGO BOUTIQUE
on Thursday, December 12th from 3-6
as we unveil our new Career Center!
Visit DressForSuccess.org/RedRiverValley to learn about volunteer opportunities
and to stay informed on upcoming events.
GLOBAL IMPACT
Local
Womans
passion in Peru
creates better life
for those living there
By LaurelLee Loftsgard
WINTER 2013-14 32 | WOMENS IMPACT
S
ometimes, a little hope goes
a long way.
After an earthquake
devastated the city of Chimbote,
Peru, 38 years ago, Father Jack
Davis and Sister Peggy Byrne
offered hope in the form of faith-
based social programs to help
the less fortunate.
By 1998, the mission and its
health and education programs
became so successful, the non-
prot Friends of Chimbote was
formed.
You kind of go down
there expecting to be sad and
depressed, and you dont know
what to do with the poverty
you see, says Susan Trnka, the
organizations executive director.
Whats so amazing is the
people you see down there are
so full of joy. They teach us that
you dont need what you think
you need to be happy because
they do with a lot less.
Trnka was a nurse and
member of Nativity Parish when
she made her rst visit to Peru.
Instantly, she was hooked.
The people are so inspiring,
loving and passionate. They help
us learn more about ourselves,
and you come home questioning
your own life, she says. What
you do, what you have; you want
to share what you can.
Six years ago, when Friends of
Chimbote grew too large to be
all volunteer, Trnka was named to
her current position. Though she
still has her nursing license, shes
never looked back. And shes not
the only one who feels that way.
Trnka shared a story about
a North Dakota family who
went down to volunteer for
about a month. After two weeks,
Trnka saw all of the kids from
Chimbote and from North
Dakota playing together, and
when she asked if they were
having fun, the children replied,
Main photo: Susan Trnka, right, with a woman
at a carnival held in Chimbote for disabled
residents. Inset: Trnka with Padre Elmer
Mendoza, the priest at the Chimbote mission.
Yeah, but when are we going to
meet the poor kids?
When you stop looking at
them as poor and just as people
like the rest of us, they just want
what we want, Trnka explains.
They want families, kids that are
educated, not sick, and successful.
You nd a lot of common ground
no matter what their situation is.
Their situation is much
different than ours.
In Peru, going to school is a
privilege, Trnka says. Children
have to bring their own paper for
tests, and even bring their own
toilet paper.
In the barrios of Father Jacks
mission, the unemployment rate
is as high as 80 percent. Because
of this, a lot of families dont
have the funds to relocate, and
women are left alone as their
spouses leave to nd work. This
leaves a lot of single-mother
households.
Women still face major
obstacles when it comes to
equality, in the community and in
the home.
Friends of Chimbote has a
womens refugee center, but
Trnka said many women dont
go because the abuse they face
makes them feel ashamed or
embarrassed. Because of this, the
group soon will start a womens
education center to provide the
skills and information needed to
end the cycle of violence and the
cycle of thinking violence is OK.
Despite the obstacles, statistics
are headed in the right direction.
Friendsofchimbote.org states
that in 2012, 1,738 at-risk and/
or abused women and children
were served by the organizations
legal defense program.
Its for children to be safe,
women to be empowered and
for adults to have education and
skills so that they can take care
of themselves and have pride in
themselves. Thats our ultimate
goal, and were making progress.
At the end of the day, Trnka is
grateful for what the community
can teach us all.
They just have a lot of faith; its
so pure. Pray and hope that their
futures will be better, she says.
You dont have to be Catholic to
go on a mission trip. Down there
at church, youre all one. Theyre
praising God, thanking him for
what they have.
Chimbote, in
north-central Peru,
had a population
of more than
206,000 in 2005,
according
to Encyclopedia
Britannica. The
citys population
boomed in the
20th century
because of the
regions robust
anchovy shing
industry.
The Ancash
earthquake
May 31, 1970,
devastated the
region. The quake
also known as the
Great Peruvian
Earthquake,
measuring 7.9 on
the Richter scale,
resulted in 70,000
casualties and left
800,000 homeless.
Most of the
fatalities resulted
from building
collapses and
landslides,
according to
Earthquake.USGS.
gov.
You can learn more and how to help at Friendsofchimbote.org.
Donate your money, time, talents or supplies to help these people
and families in need.
GLOBAL IMPACT
WOMENS IMPACT | 33 WINTER 2013-14
DISCOVER YOUR
PASSION
YMCA OF CASS AND CLAY COUNTIES
Fercho Y 400 1st Ave S Fargo | Schlossman Y 4243 19th Ave S Fargo | 701.293.9622
www.ymcacassclay.org
Bring this ad in for a FREE DAY PASS AND FACILITY TOUR at either
branch of the YMCA of Cass and Clay Counties. One pass per person.
Must present photo ID with pass. Expires January 15, 2014.
Work or volunteer at the YMCA!
View all current employment and
volunteer opportunities online at
www.ymcacassclay.org/jobs.
BE OUR
GUEST
EVENTS
Upcoming Community Events
December
Santa Village
Daycare Days
9 to 11 a.m. and
1 to 3 p.m. Dec. 3-6,
Rheault Farm,
2902 25th St. S., Fargo.
Santas Village is open free for day
care groups. Bring non-perishable
food items, new or used toys, new
mittens and hats or cash to donate to
local nonprots. Call (701) 499-7788
for reservations.
Special Meet-and-Greet
with Santa
6 to 8 p.m. Dec. 5
Beyond Boundaries,
3001 11th St. S, Fargo, ND
Hosted by Family Voices, this is for
children with special health care
needs to spend some time with
Santa without worry or rush. Bring
your cameras.
Jingle Bell Run/Walk for Arthritis
9 a.m. Dec. 7
Courts Plus Community Fitness, 3491
S. University Drive, Fargo.
Hosted by the Arthritis Foundation.
Wear your best Christmas sweaters
and holiday garb for this run for
a cause. Register at www.jbrfargo.
kintera.org, $20-$35.
Bowls for Babies
11 a.m. Dec. 11
Ramada Plaza Inn & Suites,
1635 42nd St. S., Fargo
Choose a bowl designed by one of
our local artists and enjoy a portion
of soup at this warming fundraiser.
All proceeds go to March of Dimes.
Buy $25 tickets at any Gate City bank
location.
FirstLinks Giving Tree of Hope
and Connection Fair
9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Dec. 18
Fargo Civic Center Centennial Hall,
207 4th St. N., Fargo.
Enjoy giving gifts to children and
adults with special needs who would
not otherwise receive gifts.
January
Care for Kids Radiothon
All day Jan. 30-31.
Enjoy the on-air radiothon with
Midwest Communication Stations
Y94 (93.7FM) and Froggy 99.9
(99.9FM). All proceeds go to the
Childrens Miracle Network of
Sanfords Childrens Fargo.
February
Family Winter-ic Day
1 p.m., Feb. 1
Edgewood Chalet, 19th Avenue
North Golf Course, Fargo.
Free cross-country skiing (gear
available), sledding and Clydesdale
sleigh rides.
Heart Ball for the American
Heart Association
5 p.m. Feb 1
www.redrivervalleyheartball.org
25th Annual Sweetheart Ball
Ronald McDonald House
6 p.m. Feb. 8
The Holiday Inn,
3803 13th Ave. S., Fargo
Buy $75 tickets on
impactgiveback.org
WINTER 2013-14 34 | WOMENS IMPACT
A group of 3- and 4-year-olds releases balloons with staff of
the Fraser Child Care Center to mark the Giving Hearts Day
fundraiser on Valentines Day 2012, in front of Fraser Ltd.,
Fargo, N.D. Michael Vosburg / Forum Photo Editor
Purple-N-Pucks: Fargo Force
Fights Cancer
7:05 p.m., Feb. 11
Scheels Arena, 5225 31st Ave. S., Fargo.
Players will wear purple jerseys to be
auctioned off. Hosted by Jill Henning,
Agent of State Farm. All proceeds will
go to (embrace), a cancer program
through Sanford.
Giving Hearts Day
All day Feb. 13
150 nonprots will be raising money.
Last year, over $3.7 million was raised
for local organizations. Give your
support to the nonprots of your
choice atimpactgiveback.org.
Home is Where the Art Is
for the Lake Agassiz Habitat
for Humanity
Feb. 22
Spirit Room,
111 Broadway, Fargo
Recycled art show and silent auction.
Local artists were given a $50
voucher and were invited to shop
at the Habitat ReStore and turn
reclaimed items into works of art
to be auctioned off at the event in
support of LAHFH.
www.lakeagassizhabitat.org/news/
specialevents.html
EVENTS
WOMENS IMPACT | 35 WINTER 2013-14
Runners push off for the Fargo-Moorhead Arthritis
Foundation s Jingle Bell Run/Walk to benet the
Foundations cause. Participants were urged to wear a
holiday themed costumes for the 5K at Courts Plus in
south Fargo. Bruce Crummy / Forum le photo
Have a Spring/Summer 2014 event or fundraiser
youd like to see in Womens Impact? Email
info@womensimpact.org.
WINTER 2013-14 36 | WOMENS IMPACT
Eide Bailly Celebrates Women in Business
Eide Bailly is taking intentional and deliberate steps to help women
rise through the ranks by creating equality in mentorship, leadership
and advancement for all members of the Firm. These efforts are
positively reected in the number of women who serve as partners
and leaders in Eide Bailly.
Research shows that having both men and women serve in leadership
roles results in better decisions. Eide Bailly understands this, and will
continue to promote and encourage women in business!
If youd like to join a company where
you can reach your full potential,
visit us at www.eidebailly.com/careers.
I am proud to co-chair
Eide Baillys Womens
Initiative, which has helped
us improve the retention and
advancement of women.
~
Jenni Huotari, Partner
(Continued from Page 27)
What advice would you give
your teenage self?
I never thought about this
as something that I should do,
I just did it, and I realized the
last few years that its a real
blessing for me to be involved.
Ive always been involved.
I joined this and that and
different kinds of efforts, took
different positions in fraternity,
student government, spoke
up in class, but I didnt know
that was the thing to do. But
it allowed me to meet and
grow so much more because
I was involved and active in
what I was in.
I think thats the greatest
lesson, but I didnt realize until
later how much it helped.
Id say to surround yourself
with uplifting people. They
bring out the best in other
people, and I think thats one
of the greatest lessons Ive
ever learned. We become
who we hang out with and
what were exposed to if
we surround ourselves with
negative.
I think we need to be
realistic but that everything
is possible. Surround yourself
with people who have that
can-do attitude because it
helps you believe the same.
Be involved, active and
surround yourself with
uplifting, kind, encouraging and
caring people because I think
it spreads.
What advice can you give to
empower someones life?
Shoot for the moon. It has
to be what youre passionate
about.
One of the books Im
reading is 7 Mindsets. I wish
I wouldve known them when
I was a teenager. In a nutshell,
they are:
1. Start with everything is
possible.
2. Passion rst.
3. Live to give
4. Live your dreams.
5. Have an attitude of
gratitude.
6. Were all connected.
7. Be 100 percent
accountable.
Our mindset determines
what were going to be t,
not t, happy, not happy,
helpful, not helpful it all
comes from our mindset.
Having that everything is
possible attitude transcends
all of them.
How can we best impact the
world today?
I think everyone can have
an impact and be involved
in some way to make a
difference, but it has to be
something youre passionate
about.
Instead of a bucket list, we
should make an impact list.
Whats the impact that youd
like to have in life? What will
your legacy be?
How many people answer
that question? Not many.
I would say to impact the
world, you need to plan your
impact.
Decide what youre
passionate about and
plan your impact because
everyone can make a
difference.
Someone else isnt going to
do it, we can do it.
We can help our neighbors
right here at home, in Peru.
We can do whatever because
were all connected.
Many of these problems
are tough to solve on their
own if theyre big, but you
can help your neighbor. And
whats beautiful about the
impact is that its yours, and
its personal.
MENS IMPACT
I

t doesnt matter if you are
the CEO of a company or
the executive director of your
family, you are welcome to give
the laptop a break, line up a
babysitter and join our Womens
Empower Hour Monthly Event!
As hectic as life can be, we all
deserve a fun night out with the
girls to enjoy free appetizers,
prizes, an inspirational talk and
the opportunity to connect
with amazing women in our
community.

A table is available for women
who want to bring their
business cards, promotional
materials or share a cause they
are passionate about.
JOIN US
What:
Womens Empower Hour
When:
First Tuesday of every
month
Where:
Maxwells Restaurant
380 9th St. E West Fargo
(701) 277-9463
Interested in impacting lives through Womens Impact? Email us at info womensimpact.org and join our movement today.
Womens Empower Hour
WOMENS IMPACT | 37 WINTER 2013-14
GET CONNECTED, BE EMPOWERED
AND MAKE AN IMPACT.
WINTER 2013-14 38 | WOMENS IMPACT
VOICES
A
lmost 17 years ago, I
started my gratitude
journal with the entry
above. I keep the book by my
bed, and try to write at least
ve things for which Im grateful
every night before sleep.
The power of a gratitude
journal is several-fold. It serves
to re-direct our brain off the
worries and negatives, and onto
what is right in our world. It also
serves as a quick diary to record
those moments youll later be
grateful to have.
Aug. 1, 2008 being with
Mom for her last breath
Happy Trails lounge pants
crying with Dad Moms deer.
Each of those phrases evokes
a specic place in time that I can
revisit with joy whenever I have
a few minutes.
Gratitude is not about
acceptance or settling. Gratitude
is seeing the grace and joy in
every moment, dropping the
judgments and expectations
of how something should be
and relaxing into the what is.
Gratitude is about breathing
deeply into the present where
our life is and seeing it in its
wholeness.
Try it for the next week.
Leave a notebook and pen by
your bed and take a minute to
think of your day. Find the joy
in it and write those moments
down. Check in with yourself
how are you feeling after
youve recorded your gratitude
moments?
Chances are you feel calmer,
happier and more peaceful. You
may even sleep better. It takes
six weeks to change a habit. Im
a big believer in gratitude as a
great habit to acquire, so grab
your journal and get grateful.
Ekberg Risher, the Style Mystic,
is a writer, mom and wife who
lives in Fargo, N.D. Readers can
reach her at tall_susie@yahoo.
com.
GRATITUDE
JOURNAL HOW-TO
Dr. Robert Emmons,
professor at the
University of California,
Davis, shares these
research-
based tips for reaping the
greatest psychological
rewards from your
gratitude journal:
Dont just go through
the motions. Research
by psychologist Sonja
Lyubomirsky and others
suggests that journaling
is more effective if you
rst make the conscious
decision to become
happier and more
grateful.
Go for depth over
breadth. Elaborating in
detail about a particular
thing for which youre
grateful carries more
benets than a supercial
list of many things.
Get personal. Focusing
on people to whom you
are grateful has more of
an impact than focusing
on things for which you
are grateful.
Try subtraction, not just
addition. One effective
way of stimulating
gratitude is to reect
on what your life would
be like without certain
blessings, rather than just
tallying up all those good
things.
Savor surprises. Try
to record events that
were unexpected or
surprising, as these tend
to elicit stronger levels of
gratitude.
Dont overdo it. Studies
have shown than writing
occasionally (once or
twice per week) is
actually more benecial
than daily journaling.
Mary Jo Hotzler
Source: Greater Good
Science Center,
University of California,
Berkeley
Voices
Jan. 13, 1997
Marys massage
Helen OConnells phone call
Steves beef stroganoff
My Ford Expedition on these icy roads
Kari s 100% on Social Studies
Erik remembering Word of the Day
VOICES: Womens Impact invites a
guest writer each issue to share her
view of the world and how to make a
difference in it.
Finding a great attitude from within
By Susie Ekberg Risher
R
0
0
1
9
8
4
5
2
3
701.356.4370 | www.tax-xpert.net
Most people spend more time planning their
vacation than they do planning their taxes.
Prudent planning will reduce your taxes today
and for years to come. Call Tax Xperts to nd
out how to maximize your deductions, claim
your tax credits and effectively reduce your tax
bill. Plan your taxes effectively and you could
pay for your vacation.
Open year-round
Over 50 years of combined experience
300 NP Ave N #308, Fargo, ND 58102
701-478-7800 info@ASAHinSudan.org
Your Donations
Protect, Educate & Empower
orphaned girls in South Sudan
Deb Dawson of Fargo founded the ASAH
Boarding School for Orphaned Girls
in South Sudan. Today ASAH is
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girls will change
their world!
701.476.7216 | www.prairie-stjohns.com | Fargo
Cendentlal Assessments
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Serving patients, their families and
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