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of Invention
(Or, A Metaphoric Demonstration of Inventive Devices)
Aristotle falls to his knees, thinking that the Gods have descended from Mt.
Olympus, but then, remembering that he doesn't buy into the polytheism of his
fellow citizens, he arises to see a huge cylindrical object, so huge it fills up
the horizon, which has landed immediately in front of him. He is astonished to see
humans, garbed in strange attire, but humans nevertheless, descending from the
spaceship. Ari only regains his faculties when all of the visitors, numbering
nine, assemble in front of and look expectantly at him ..........
Ari: What manner of Gods are you?!
Ari: But certainly you are the Gods of old spoken of by Homer?
Jack Nicholson: You want the truth? Well mister, you can't
HANDLE THE TRUTH! (Precedent)
Elvis: Did someone say rehab? Oh no, oh no, don't want none of
that...(Breaks into song) "I wanna git me a jelly
donut, jelly donut, yeah yeah yeah." (Efficient cause)
Ari: What is your purpose for being here? Please, I beg of you,
impart the great wisdom you must have!
JFK: Uhh, ask not what your polis can do for you, but
rather what you can do for your penis ...... uh,
Polis! Hey Aretha, it's a long trip home, come lay
some of that soul on me, Queen.(Conjectural stasis)
And so it came to pass, long after the advent of the Gods from beyond, that
Aristotle was inspired to write his greatest treatise, “On Erotica”. At least,
that's what it was until various ecumenical councils got hold of the text. But
hey, rhetoric, erotic, it's all the same, because in the end it's all about the
power to %$#@ or get %$#@ed.