Dipsomapolis:

A wrecked promenade through horrors of the North

Copyright 2014 Gari Hart Published by Gari Hart at Smashwords Cover art by Alex Khu pra!ha sri

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"ames have bee !ha ged# but the $ear a d bewilderme t o$ what $ollows are verbatim

%e years had passed si !e & had last bee withi the 'i

esota borders( & spe t

several early tee age summers va!atio i g there# i both the "orth a d South regio s# but the popula!e a d & did ot part amiably( )he a assig me t was o$$ered to assess the e!o omi! strai i 'i eapolis however & !ould *t !o test# largely !o sideri g my ow

waveri g $i a !ial stability( & agreed to the assig me t# eve though it mea t goi g straight i to the heart o$ where & was ot wel!omed a ymore( +our days i a o !e hostile e viro me t# with a $ree hotel a d per diem $or lu !hes a d di ers( &t had bee over a year

si !e & had a opportu ity to step out o$ Chi!ago a yway( & agreed a d drove the tumultuous rode to the u suitably i!, amed "orth Star state( 'y arrival was poorly timed# !oi !idi g with the -i,i gs i expli!ably losi g to the Clevela d .row s i their $irst home game o$ the seaso ( &$ you , ow a ythi g about $ootball# you , ow it is "/% a!!eptable to lose to Clevela d# espe!ially o your home tur$( %he pe alty $or doi g so is lo g0sta di g ridi!ule# a d total loss o$ !redibility as a sports team a d the $a s o$ said team( %his hypotheti!al humiliatio was be!omi g a reality spreadi g over the streets o$ 'i eapolis as & was pulli g i to tow ( .etwee i hospitable +ootball 2

$a s# superstitious hotel !ler,s# a d sour deali gs at some bar !alled %ur er*s that double0 bot!hed my di er order# 'i esota $ailed to re!laim a y appeal it lost o years be$ore( &

already !ould ot wait to leave $or home# Chi!ago( %he assig me t was s!heduled $or $our days# a d & , ew it was ot goi g to be do e without Her!ulea i ta,es o$ al!ohol1 whi!h & i itiated immediately# while still at %ur er*s( & oted the desolate ess o$ the !ity streets whe stumbli g ba!, to the hotel( & was a!!ustomed to Chi!ago# where you typi!ally rea!h your desti atio by ri!o!heti g o$$ other pedestria s li,e a pi ball( %he su was 2ust retiri g a d 'i eapolis had be!ome a ghost tow ( 3ver more !urious# & oted that all & !ould see o e

dire!tio was a stret!h or bars a d taver s# a d the other was a stret!h o$ strip !lubs a d sex shops( "o e are establishme ts & am opposed to# but it is a problem whe the o ly !hoi!es $or a!tivity are booze & grease food or booze & breasts( .oth optio s are goi g to be detrime tally expe sive# a d either was a ythi g more lo g term heada!he disguised as a pote tially good time( .ut o$ !ourse# o e o$ these pla!es appeared to have a y sig o$ li$e i them( Although & $elt opa4ue the ext mor i g# & got straight to wor,( & tera!ti g with 'i eapolis daytime !iti5e s was e4uivale t to ta,i g !e sus $rom 5ombies( 3ve whe they

did reply# it was brie$# o se si!al# a d hasty# as i$ they were a$raid( Somethi g was de$i itely wro g i 'i eapolis# a d the whole pla!e $elt u settli g( )he ever & was o$$ duty

& dri$ted $rom bar to bar# dri ,i g over0pri!ed !o!,tails a d dis!overi g greatly dis!o !erti g establishme ts( 3very pla!e was $illed with listless# almost hyp oti5ed patro s who did ot eat their meals or dri , their dri ,s1 or meals a d dri ,s were served to empty tables( 3ve stra ger was a 6a55 !lub !alled the 7ast Stop( & $ou d it at a i terse!tio & passed several times duri g the day# but it was ot visible i the su light( )ith large wi dows a d purple eo light pro2e!ti g through them# it should have bee 4uite easy to spot someo e i side( & we t to ope the e tra !e door# but it was lo!,ed( 8oari g a d vigorous tu es !ould $ai tly

be heard !omi g $rom i side# so & assumed they were ope or getti g ready to( & stepped up to o e o$ the wi dows a d loo,ed i side( %he !hairs a d bar were set up $or servi!e# but o o e was arou d : or ot visibly at least( Stayi g there $or a mome t# & heard the disti !t blare o$ !rowd !hatter rise up to ble d with the musi!( %he auditory evide !e o$ li$e i side otwithsta di g# the pla!e was empty# without prese !e( & ba!,ed away slowly# ot wa ti g to disturb whatever hau ted the 7ast Stop( &mmutably# o !e the su was dow # the streets be!ame deserted( 'i eapolis is a

lo ely pla!e( despite the i !redible !rime rate# Chi!ago is a more wel!omi g !ity tha a y other & have bee to( & sear!hed $or a ythi g that $elt homeli,e# a d surprisi gly & !ame upo o e to $ar 3ast side o$ the !ity limits( &t was !alled S,yway( A e ormous &ggy Pop poster hu g behi d the bar# a d ;avid .owie played o the stereo( S,yway was a di er by day a d bar by ight# $ur ished with red vi yl booths a d barstools with silver !hrome li i g( ;ust a d dirt !a,ed over the glittery $loor# a d the lights were dim e ough to !ause a!!ide ts( 7i,e everywhere else# $ew people were i side( At the bar sat at da55li g redhead readi g a ewspaper a d dri ,i g vod,a eat( 3ve without ma,i g eye !o ta!t a d o ly seei g her $rom the side# & se sed her ethereal aura( She dressed simple# i 2ea s a d t0shirt# be!ause her prese !e was su$$i!ie tly impressive( & !ould ot help but sit dow ext to her( She loo,ed up# a d with a sigh

dropped the ewspaper o the !ou ter# the grabbed her dri , as she wal,ed behi d the bar( She tur ed out to be the bar,eep# a d as,ed what & wa ted to dri ,( Her ame was .elle a d she was extraordi arily ex4uisite# with a voi!e li,e wi d blowi g through autum leaves that had $alle to the grou d( & told her & was $rom Chi!ago# whi!h thrilled her as she wa ted to visit there $or years( /ur !o versatio was i terrupted whe a s,eletal $igure materiali5ed through a wall i the ba!, !or er a d started strutti g oisily arou d the pla!e# sitti g at booths or o stools $or se!o ds at a time a d the movi g to a other spot( At o e poi t# he

stood very !lose to me a d tal,ed to .elle( +rom their ex!ha ges# o e !ould easily see he was a ge tle# old soul( & i trodu!ed mysel$# a d he !ordially as,ed me to !all him 6( %he he !hattered his teeth ghoulishly# !a!,led wishes o$ pleasa t eve i gs to .elle a d !almly le$t( .elle said 6 was a artist who wor,ed o a barter system# a d that he ever paid $or a ythi g arou d tow i$ he !ould trade some o$ his wor, $or it i stead( Subse4ue tly# she said that his appeara !e was the sig al to !lose up( & said goodbye to .elle respe!t$ully 0 a truly remar,able perso i a u remar,able tow ( Havi g $ew other optio s# & !o ti ued dri ,i g at the hotel bar# where & spo,e with a a drogy ous $igure who !alled themselves Syd ey Curie( %hey loo,ed li,e they !ame o$$ a Pu , ro!, li e o$ a por!elai doll set# a d i sisted & visit a pla!e !alled ;(;(*s( Syd ey bought me whis,ey o the ro!,s u til & bla!,ed out( )he & regai ed !o s!ious ess the ext mor i g i my hotel room my eyes were bloodshot a d my to e was pallid( & was starti g to resemble the lo!als( %his egle!ted to ma,e tra sa!ti g with them a y smoother( & $a!t# it appeared they were getti g worse< i !omprehe sible a d hostile( %hat day was lo g a d turbule t# a d & was losi g !are $or my assig me t( & gave it little thought a d e$$ort by this poi t( Givi g up early that eve i g due to la!, o$ progress# & de!ided o di er at a %i,i bar a d grill & had read about i o e o$ the

hotel bro!hures( &t was !alled .ettie*s Asylum a d was said to serve paramou t burgers a d remar,able !o!,tails( %he pla!e was lo!ated o the other side o$ the river# so & would have to ta,e my !ar( %he Asylum*s par,i g lot had =10 'i ute Par,i g / ly> sig s i every spa!e( &t made se se to me though< A yo e who wa ted to ve ture this $ar out i tow had to be 4ui!,( %hey did *t have time to say hello 0 or had the !apa!ity to# & would guess( %hey wal,ed i # were served# a d ra out be$ore $i ishi g their meal?be$ore the su we t dow ( /ddly e ough# all spots were o!!upied# a d & e ded up havi g to par, o the street a blo!, up

be$ore ma,i g my way $or the patio se!tio ( %wo servers es!orted me to a table i a $ar !or er( %he $ormatio o$ o e o$ them i $ro t a d the other behi d me might have seemed li,e & was a priso er bei g es!orted i to a !ell( Although# & do ot believe a yo e oti!ed this( & did ot hear a y !o versatio s as & trailed passed the pa!,ed establishme t( People were there# 2ust ot i tera!ti g with ea!h other( A$ter & was seated# & oti!ed the large spider0web 2ust o$$ to my side# o e & somehow missed whe wal,i g by( %here was a other web# a imme se o e# over the head o$ a woma at a other table( %hat web housed a alarmi gly big ara!h id( &t was rubbi g its pedipalps a d !heli!erae together# savori g the mome t be$ore the predatory pou !e( )hile & !o templated i$ this !reature would ru me dow i$ & made a brea, $or it ow# the barte der 2abbered o about their eve i g spe!ials( %here was a mome t betwee him $i ishi g a d me respo di g# whe & !al!ulated there was o leavi g .ettie*s Asylum u til that ara!h id $ell i to a $ood !oma $ollowi g his master $east( & order their APsy!ho* burger a $ew tropi!al apBriti$s to dull the pai should the massive tara tula tur to me $or dessert( / !e my burger !ame# & ordered a vod,a based di er

!o!,tail a d a digesti$( %he $ood was i deed marvelous# a d the dri ,s too( A$ter a while# & oti!ed the ara!h id had ve tured o$$ somewhere# a d the woma he sat above was go e( ;uri g my whis,ey based digesti$# a semitra spare t Curie appeared a d reasserted their re!omme datio s $or ;(;*s( & was $eeli g thorough relieved to ma,e it through di a d was ready to !elebrate( So & agreed to let the apparitio lead the way( ;(;(*s was a eerie lou ge ot too mu!h $urther up the river( &t had tiger pri t !arpet a d bla!, padded booths( Huma trophy heads hu g above the booths i pla!e o$ .u!, heads( A world wor guitarist played .lues ri$$s $rom his stool ear the e try way( %he doorma a d barte der were splattered with blood# a d they spo,e with some a !ie t a!!e t( & was seated a d give a me u( %heir dri ,s were se satio al !o!,tails amed a$ter por stars or 5ombie movie heroi es( A Ku g0+u Combie $ilm was playi g o the televisio ( & wat!hed the er alive#

$ilm u til a waitress $loated i $rom behi d me( She wore a bla!,# ba!,less# $loor0le gth -0 e!, eve i g gow a d ema ated a orphi! allure( %hough she ever loo,ed up $rom the $loor# our mi ds lo!,ed a d & glea ed $ragme ts o$ her history( She was bor be$ore time as we u derstood it# had wit essed ge esis alo g with the !ou tless !ompli!atio s that e sued( She saved sele!t !ivili5atio s a d !o dem ed others# a d the o ly reaso art was i ve ted was to !apture her li,e ess< Ghostly pale a d devilish# with a ga5e that !rushed your will a d i stilled hers( She impassively too, my order1 she was *t i terested i me # o ly their blood( & ordered somethi g !o tai i g Absi the( & am a Absi the !o oisseur# a d it is hard to $i d

i bars# let0alo e o e mixes !o!,tails with it( %he waitress !oasted behi d a divider o$ bla!, velvet !urtai s# a d emerged i sta tly with my dri ,( )ith a tou!h o$ !o tempt# she set it dow ( %he dri , was a tra slu!e t yellow# served i a !hampag e sau!er with a !herry gar ish( / e sip made you levitate# a d a se!o d set ailme ts abla5e a d re dered them ashes( & had several( %hey u leashed my mi d to slither i to the atmosphere# leavi g my body a empty dipsoma ia!al vessel a !hored to the !hair( & be!ame othi g goi g owhere to o e d( .y the time mi d a d body had reu ited : it !ould have bee hours# or days later 0 & $ou d mysel$ ba!, at the hotel# !ompletely u i $ormed o$ how & made it ba!,( %he $ollowi g mor i g was ex!ru!iati g( %he Su was so bright that it slathered virtually everythi g to a yellowish hue( A d the void o$ sou d the voi!eless day trippers made was bei g substituted with a ob oxious stati!# that made it impossible sustai a y sort o$ !o !e tratio ( & did ot eve thi , about wor,1 it was di$$i!ult e ough to re!all that was why & had !ome to 'i eapolis( 'y re$le!tio loo,ed more de!repit# too( %he whites o$ my eyes

were almost red a d dry# a d my s,i appeared to be $adi g to a pale gree ( All ratio ality told me to stay i doors# sleep this $oul ess o$$ be$ore drivi g ba!, to Chi!ago the ext day( "o doubt this hotel had room servi!e li,e a y other1 eve i$ & de!ided to waste the day away# it !ould be do e $rom the !om$ort a d sa$ety o$ my re ted bed# i $ro t o$ my re ted

televisio set with pay0per0view !ha

els $eaturi g the same programs & got $or $ree ba!, esota without havi g some !o !ept o$ what

home( However & , ew that & !ould ot leave 'i

was happe i g 2ust i side its Souther border# that u de$i ed stra ge ess whi!h had the pote tial to stret!h thru the li e betwee 'i esota a d )is!o si # a d eve dow i to

&lli ois a d beyo d( +orget whatever the origi al assig me t had bee # & was ow o a re!o aissa !e missio ( & threw o some $resh !lothes a d su glasses# a d roamed the

streets while the su was still up# hopi g to $i d a swers( .ut the lo!als had go e mute# or at least i audible i the ambie t stati!# whi!h aturally was louder outside tha i the hotel room( "o o e eve respo ded whe & bega pushi g them i to ea!h other out o$ $rustratio ( %hey merely regai ed their bala !e a d pressed o whatever path they had bee i !hi g at( %hey would be o help( &$ & wa ted a y type o$ lead that reveal some !lues# the it had to be at what & assumed was the heart o$ the beast( Si !e it was barely dus,# & de!ided to wal, a!ross a d up the river( .a!, at ;(;*s right as starlight seeped through the twilight# the same employees $rom the ight be$ore waited 2ust i side the door# li,e they expe!ted my retur ( %hey wore the same !lothes# a d the same movie was showi g o their %- set1 the same .lues guitarist still 2ammi g( %hey were oblivious to the $a!t that the su had !ome up a d go e dow agai # that the day had !ha ged a d it was a ew eve i g 0 %ime was o e e dless ight $or them( %here was also the possibility to !o sider whether & had le$t at all( 'aybe it was the same ight# a d & had wal,ed outside o ly to tur arou d i Absi the stupor a d strolled ba!, i ( %ruth was# o e way or the other# that & $ou d mysel$ i side o !e more a d they were ready to re!eive( %he waitress es!orted me to a table where a dri , was already set( & did ot say a ythi g# 2ust sat dow a d grabbed the glass( %he mood i the pla!e had !ha ged radi!ally( &t was ow grave a d !old1 i viti g but with ulterior motives a d evil $orewar i gs# as i$ the lou ge were a!tually the lid o$ a massive ossuary a d psy!hoge i! out!ries $rom the remai s

be eath bled through the $loor# i to the oxyge ( & surveyed the pla!e( %here was ot a other soul besides the employees# who starred at me with $lared pupils a d li!,ed their lips with elo gated# blood0stai ed to gues( & ervously gulped my dri ,# aimi g to leave immediately( %he early# brave dete!tive & was that day !rumbled i the vibratio s o$ my timorous a d $ai thearted mi d u der eath at the $ou datio o$ me( %here was o good reaso to stay a y lo ger( %he best thi g to do was leave be$ore the situatio be!ame eve more te se a d u real( %he waitress $lashed over as & stood up( She e$$ortlessly $or!ed me ba!, dow with o e ha d a d slid a other dri , dow with the other# wordlessly !omma di g & !o ti ue imbibi g whatever the hell they were givi g me( She would ot wal, away u til & too, a sip( %hat o !e dista t# !omely i amorata revealed hersel$ as a 2e5ebel( Her mi d pe etrated mi e as mea s to subdue my a xiety# ,eep me !alm so & would sit a while lo ger( .ut she did ot a!!ou t $or this magi!, tri!, permitti g me to see her thoughts too( 3verythi g was detailed out o$ me as our mi ds 2oi ed as o e< & had stumbled i to a !amou$laged abattoir( %hey were mi utes away $rom lo!,i g the doors a d devouri g me( %hese $rea,s were ot 5ombies li,e the people outside# they were vampires( %hey deployed tamed 5ombies as a ig iter# pushi g visitors to dri , heavily be!ause o$ the stra ge e !ou ters( 3xte ded stay i dow tow 'i eapolis mea t

elevated al!oholism# a d vi!tims e ded up at ;(;*s sear!hi g $or stro ger !o !o!tio s( %ra 4uili5ed by their u i4ue !o!,tails# they were eate alive( %he 5ombies disperse at su dow be!ause a vampire might ma,e do with them $or brea,$ast( Somewhere buried deep i the hippo!ampus o$ their mushy brai s was the memory o$ $ear( &mmu e to this i !ubus was S,yway( &t was a asylum $or pre!o!ious travelers who ma aged to es!ape( .elle $ou d a way to suppress# eve i o!ulate the e$$e!ts( & had to retur to S,yway $or a y !ha !e o$ survivi g this trip( .ut three vampires ow guarded the exit to ;(;*s( & stood up# a ti!ipati g the waitress* swi$t appeara !e# a d as,ed

to be show to the rest room( Hesita tly she glided towards the 'e *s 8oom# opposite o$ the $ro t door# whi!h $rom what & !ould tell was the o ly way out( & made a brea, $or it# mi d$ul that there were still two vampires to over!ome( H prepared $or this $lee attempt# the doorma a d barte der $lou dered to stop me( & smashed my Champaig sau!er agai st a d bar stool a d drove the sharp edges i to the doorma ( %he barte der seemed stu!, i pla!e a$ter that( & ra out the door a d i to the ight( .lue $lashi g lights !ame $rom multiple dire!tio s o !e & rea!hed earest i terse!tio ( %hey must have bee sig als to my lo!atio # be!ause the typi!ally empty ight streets were sudde ly swamped with twisted 2u ,ies u li,e what & saw duri g the days( %hese thi gs were more !ohere t tha the 5ombies( %hey !hased me the whole way ba!, a!ross the river# up u til & $i ally got i side S,yway( .elle mi dlessly wiped dow the bar# as i$ she was ot aware o$ what was happe i g outside( & u i telligibly tried to explai what & had u !overed about 'i eapolis# a d sweetly

she patie tly liste ed to every word & ex!laimed( A$ter & was do e# hyperve tilati g $rom tal,i g without brea,# .elle simply laid her so$t ha d o my shoulder a d told me to Just pass through( %hat was the ,ey to everythi g# she said< do ot $ret over whatever obsta!le was thrust i your way# Just pass through( %his i !a tatio o$ hers made a sile !e drop outside# a d othi g !ould be see or heard arou d the pla!e( Slightly more tha embarrassed# & as,ed .elle i$ she would wal, with me ba!, to the hotel( &t seemed sa$er to go with someo e more !og i5a t a d !alm( She agreed# but as,ed me to wait outside while she !losed up( )hi!h# & did# ervously( %he streets were aba do ed o !e more# but & $eared a ythi g !ould !ome ru i g arou d the !or er o$ the blo!, at a y time(

A$ter waiti g $ive mi utes# & pulled o the door to go ba!, i side but it was lo!,ed( & loo,ed i the wi dow a d gasped at seei g thi!, layers o$ dust a d !obweb !overi g everythi g i side( .elle was go e(

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& tur ed a d $a!ed the streets# alo e( Clusters o$ people sporadi!ally hovered about aimlessly# appare tly o lo ger i stru!ted to atta!,( & slowly passed by them( %hese same !lusters va ished o !e & was $ar e ough away( So lo g as they were o immi e t threat# & wo dered the whole !ity sear!hi g $or .elle( &$ o e pie!e o$ !o solatio was still out there# & wa ted it more tha & , ew it to be hopeless( & wou d up at the hotel empty ha ded# o lu!, $ou d# i te di g to sleep a $ew hours be$ore getti g the hell out o$ 'i eapolis( & !ould ot though# ot a$ter the last $ew days(

%here was o pea!e to let your guard dow e ough i that dam !ity# where the villai ous be e$ited $rom your i se sibility( & did ot waste a other mi ute( & gathered my thi gs# pa!,ed my !ar a d got o the i terstate 2ust as the Su pee,ed over the hori5o $rom the 3ast( &*ve told $ew people i my li$e# but & am a si!, lover o$ su rises 0 the overture o$ a ew day a d o set o$ ew !ha !es( &t is a remi der that what goes arou d !omes arou d# a d that all thi gs must pass( %here is othi g more beauti$ul o this pla et tha the su rise( & too, o$$ my su glasses# a d smiled as the Su guided me home( III

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About the Author Gari Hart is a Chi!ago based writer# sometimes musi!ia # partial artist# i $re4ue t a!tor( DIPSOMAPOLIS is his $irst published wor, i de!ades( Connect with Gari Hart )ebsite J %witter J Smashwords J +a!eboo,

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