Logical

There are only 10 types of people in the world: those that understand binary
and those that dont.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
Be nice to the nerds, for all you know they might be the next Bill Gates!
Artificial intelligence usually beats real stupidity.
To err is human and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
CAPS LOCK Preventing Login Since 1980.
Browsing
The truth is out there. Anybody got the URL?
The Internet: where men are men, women are men, and children are FBI agents.
Some things Man was never meant to know. For everything else, theres Google.
Operating Systems
The box said Requires Windows Vista or better. So I installed LINUX.
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to
understand the simplicity.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
C://dos
C://dos.run
run.dos.run
Bugs come in through open Windows.
Penguins love cold, they wont survive the sun.
Unix is user friendly. Its just selective about who its friends are.
Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with your Microsoft product.
NT is the only OS that has caused me to beat a piece of hardware to death wi
th my bare hands.
My daily Unix command list: unzip; strip; touch; finger; mount; fsck; more;
yes; unmount; sleep.
Microsoft: Youve got questions. Weve got dancing paperclips.
Erik Naggum: Microsoft is not the answer. Microsoft is the question. NO is th
e answer.
Windows isnt a virus, viruses do something.
Computers are like air conditioners: they stop working when you open Windows
.
Mac users swear by their Mac, PC users swear at their PC.
Programming
If at first you dont succeed; call it version 1.0.
My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
I would love to change the world, but they wont give me the source code.
The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possi
bly be wrong.
Beware of programmers that carry screwdrivers.
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build big
ger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger a
nd better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
The beginning of the programmers wisdom is understanding the difference betwe
en getting program to run and having a runnable program.
Im not anti-social; Im just not user friendly.
Hey! It compiles! Ship it!
If Ruby is not and Perl is the answer, you dont understand the question.
The more I C, the less I see.
COBOL programmers understand why women hate periods.
Michael Sinz: Programming is like sex, one mistake and you have to support it
for the rest of your life.
If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you tea
ch them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.
Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.
My attitude isnt bad. Its in beta.
Ad Absurdum
Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.
E-mail returned to sender, insufficient voltage.
All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, Id antialias my graphics!
If brute force doesnt solve your problems, then you arent using enough.
SUPERCOMPUTER: what it sounded like before you bought it.
Evolution is Gods way of issuing upgrades.
Linus Torvalds: Real men dont use backups, they post their stuff on a public f
tp server and let the rest of the world make copies.
Hacking is like sex. You get in, you get out, and hope that you didnt leave s
omething that can be traced back to you.
Calculations
There are three kinds of people: those who can count and those who cant.
Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the worlds populati
on.
Hand over the calculator, friends dont let friends derive drunk.
An infinite crowd of mathematicians enters a bar. The first one orders a pin
t, the second one a half pint, the third one a quarter pint I understand, says the
bartender and pours two pints.
1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d.