THE CZECH FICTIONAL CHARACTER of Jra Cimrman

Objectives:
To get familiar with the background of Jra Cimrman
Speaking, role-playing based on specific situations: the form of one-man-show, dialogs, role-playing
in groups. Jra Cimrman as an inventor, Jra Cimrman as a teacher (based on The Investigation of the
Missing Class Register)
Annotation:
1. Ask students: (let students write down the answers for questions 2 and 3 in groups, then go through their
answers together)
Do you know anything about the origins of Jra Cimrmans character? Who created him and when?
Who was Jra Cimrman? / How was he presented? (his occupations)
What extensive contributions to mankind did Jra Cimrman make?
2. After the discussion about students answers for questions 2 and 3, give students the flashcards containing
descriptions of specific Cimrmans contributions in the field of science and pedagogy. Let students improvise
use the form of a monologue (one-man-show), dialogue, or talk in a group.
Give students appropriate time to think the role-play out, using dictionaries.
3. Watch (maybe twice) the scene Jra Cimrman Lying, Sleeping on youtube:
Video : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXuWSH-U_-o
Let students make notes considering vocabulary or inventors names as they are supposed to re-play
the scene in pairs.
4. Play the scene.
5. Read the extract from the play Investigation of the missing class register (extra file). Let students think
about which parts and how they would like to perform. Let them improvise.
Notes:
Question 1 the origins of Jra Cimrman:
Czech fictional character created by Ji ebnek, Ladislav Smoljak and Zdenk Svrk.
Cimrman made its first appearance on a regular radio programme Nealkoholick vinrna U Pavouka
("The Spider Non-Alcoholic Wine Bar") on December 23, 1966.
he became a very popular character of modern Czech folklore, and an artificial national hero
Theres even The Jra Cimrman Theatre - in ikov; considered one of Prague's most frequented
theatres.
Question 2 How was Jra Cimrman presented:
presented as one of the greatest Czech playwrights, poets, composers, teachers, travellers,
philosophers, inventors, detectives, mathematicians and sportsmen of the 19th and early 20th century.
Cimrman is presented as a major character or the putative (/pju: ttv/=domnl) author of a great
number of books, plays, and films

FLASHCARDS - Cimrmans contributions to mankind:

2 students - dialogue: Cimrman proposed the Panama Canal to the U.S. government.
Play the role of the US president and Cimrman proposing the idea of the Panama Canal...
Useful vocabulary: build up, short cut (zkratka), make sth easy, advantages, profit

1 student monologue: Cimrman reformed the school system in Galicia (historical region in Central
Europe that is currently situated between Poland and Ukraine).
Play the role of Cimrman and demonstrate the monologue about what you want to reform in the school
system in Galicia...
Useful vocabulary: rules, punishment (punish; v.), limits, lessons, truant (zkolk), play truant (chodit
za kolu)

2 students dialogue: With Count Zeppelin (hrab) Cimrman constructed the first airship.
Play the role of Count Zeppelin and Cimrman, discussing the technical details of the airship...
Useful vocabulary: nose, tail, interior, keel corridors, outer cover, steering mechanism (dc
mechanismus), metal cone (kuel) for the nose, antenna, storage space (lon proctor), etc. (see the
picture in the appendix)

1 student monologue: Cimrman conducted investigations about the life of Arctic tribes who eat their
fellows; and once, while running away from a furious tribe, he missed the North Pole by a mere seven
meters.
1. Play the role of Cimrman running away from the man-eating Arctic tribe, commenting on the tribes
rituals (being in the state of shock)...
2. When at home, and having realised that you missed the North Pole by only 7 metres, demonstrate your
reaction...
Useful vocabulary: snowstorm / blizzard, igloo, man-eating, Eskimo(s), parallels, meridians,
Peary (the man who is officially the first man reaching the North Pole, though its doubted)

2 students monologue / dialogue: In Paraguay, Cimrman supposedly created the first puppet-show.

One student plays the role of Cimrman, the other is his puppet.
Decide about what kind of puppet the other student will be (person, animal, fairy)
Student 1 plays a short scene using his puppet. The puppet can express its approval / disapproval with
his puppeteers words and movements...
Useful vocabulary: pull at strings, tag at strings (kubat)

All students monologue / panel discussion: In Vienna Cimrman established a school of criminology,
music and ballet.
One student plays the role of Cimrman having a public speech, trying to explain WHY he established the
school, the main GOALS of this type of education, and so on...
All the others play the roles of newly enrolled students. After Cimrmans speech, they should ask
questions, which leads to a panel discussion...

1 student monologue: Cimrman corresponded with the famous Irish playwright G.B. Shaw (late 19th,
beginning of 20th centuries, author of more than 60 plays) for many years, but unfortunately the Irishman
never replied.
Play the role of an unsatisfied Cimrman, complaining about the fact that he has sent so many letters to
G.B. Shaw, but he has never got a reply...

2 students dialogue: Cimrman invented yoghurt.

Students play the role of Cimrman and his colleague. They comment on what they are doing (the whole
process which leads to creating yoghurt). Finally, they are surprised by the result and try to find
appropriate NAME to the newly created foodstuff...

2 students dialogue: Cimrman assisted Prof. Burian with his first plastic surgery.
Students play the roles of Cimrman and Prof. Burian. They are commenting on what they are doing or
what they SHOULD do. They might have an argument, Cimrman being ahead (m navrch)...
Useful vocabulary: put to sleep (uspat narkzou), stitch (pit), restitch (pet), skin, cut away (off), put
silicone filling, give an injection, bandage

2 students dialogue: Cimrman reworked the electrical contact on Edison's first lightbulb.
Students play the roles of Cimrman and Edison. Edison believes his bulb is perfect, however, Cimrman
wants to rework the electrical contact. The result is he gets an electric shock...
Useful vocabulary: see the picture in the appendix

(Difficult) 1/2 student(s) monologue / dialogue: Cimrman is the creator of the new philosophy of
Externism (opposite to the traditional theory of solipsism => while solipsists believe that only their
individual self exists and the external world does not, Jra Cimrman believes that the external world exists
and the philosopher's individual self does not)
1. Playing the role of Cimrman, try to perform an internal monologue listing the arguments which lead
you to the conclusion that your mind / your self does NOT really exist, while the external world exists...
2. Dialogue students play the roles of Cimrman and his solipsist opponent, giving arguments for their
contrasting beliefs...

2 students dialogue: Cimrman advised Mendeleev, that the Periodic Table should be rotated to its current
(souasn) orientation.
Students play the roles of Mendeleev and Cimrman, having an argument about the Periodic Table and
the position of the natural elements...
Useful vocabulary: see the pictures in the appendix

1 student monologue: It is said that when Graham Bell had invented his telephone, he found in it 3
missed calls from Jra Cimrman.
Play the role of G. Bell, just finishing his invention of telephone. He finds out about the missed calls
from (for him unknown) Cimrman. Try to perform his reaction...

Role-playing in a group: Another of Cimrmans great inventions is also the internet, although without
widespread usage of computers, he had to use telephones. His internet basically consisted of an old circus
tent where he had a telephone aparate and various pensioned highschool teachers, who answered all
questions people had. Also the well known WWW prefix originated here. One of the teachers' name was
Weber and since he stuttered, he always introduced himself as "W-W-W.Weber."
Some students play the roles of highschool teachers (Cimrmans Internet) and the others play the role
of people making phone calls to find out answers for their questions. Just try not to shout the others
down (nepekikovat se).

Note: First, think about any common questions which you usually try to search the answers for

Pedagogue
Most of the pedagogical work of Jra Cimrman is presented in the theatre play Vyetovn ztrty tdn knihy
("Investigation of the Loss of a Class Book", 1967).
Cimrman became a teacher in a small village known as Struk, as a punishment by court, when it was revealed
he could read and write as well.
He also, in accordance with his ideology of "Futurism", prepared his students as a teacher for the future
practical usage of phones, which were being installed in Austria at that time and planted such a euphoria, that
when the first phone apparatus was installed, many of his former students began throwing a whole fortune
into the phones, calling random numbers and many of them went home from the post office as complete
beggars.
He also revolutionized his small town schooling methods with dividing the lectured subjects into clearly
marked "Forget-me-not" and "Not-forget-me-not" materials. The former was one-tenth of all the learning

material and was meant to be remembered, while the latter made up nine-tenths of the given subject and was
intended from the start to be forgotten.
As a teacher, he also put his pupils under stress to improve information retention for a particularly important
part of the subject he either snapped his whip hard on the ground or took off his wig ("lek oslnnm"
"fright by daze"). This apparently successful method bears his name to this day as the famous "Cimrman's
Fixation by Shock".
When students misbehaved, he did not punish them but punished himself instead his theory was that pupils
certainly must love their teacher and therefore would feel remorse if he should suffer. When his students put
water into his ink-bottle instead of ink, he did not leave his house for a week. His students had no school then
and so had enough free time to feel sorry for him. Alternately he would refuse to have a cigarette after lunch
and commented on it thus: "Today, after lunch, I will not smoke a cigar ("virnko"). Don't cry, it's your own
fault."

Playwright
Jra Cimrman is claimed to have authored numerous plays, many of which are said to have been lost. These
plays include Posel svtla (English "Herald of Light"), featuring his own comic vision of the future world
where people are all good to each other and so a person may, ironically, act as a complete heartless monster
without any remorse.
Another play presented as a work of Cimrman is Zskok ("The Stand-in"), which portrays actors of a fictional
amateur theatre, performing a play that is messed up by a famous and reportedly brilliant, yet in reality dumb
person who cannot forget to say other people's lines and lines from other plays and who cannot even
remember the name of his own character.
Cimrman never received great fame as a playwright in his lifetime, often because of his innovatory practices,
such as changing the length of the play in several successive performances or presenting new ideas. He is
stated to have sent many of his plays to Ladislav Stroupenick (a famous Czech playwright) under his name
and two pseudonyms, forming such a bundle of rejected works that Stroupenick recalls they "cost him 60
working days". He also encouraged Cimrman not to write to him and if possible "not to write at all". After
Cimrman replied on a familiar note, because they both studied at the same school, Stroupenick never
recovered.

One of the plays, also said to be lost, which was a subject of their correspondence, was echov na pu
(English: "Czechs on p"), a fictional account of an old Bohemian legend, which is here said to feature not
only the legendary Forefather Czech, but also other characters as Forefather German, Forefather Jew and, in
dialogue only, Forefather Gipsy, by which Cimrman wanted to honour all major nationalities living in
Bohemia. The play was later re-done and its name changed to echov na pu ("Czechs for Turnip",
changing just uppercase "" into lower case ""), in order to motivate people to work at a sugar refinery in
Klnovice.

Another man, whom Cimrman is said to have surprised with his works was Jacob Durman, director of the
Royal Chamber Theatre in Haag, who, after reading his play Przdniny s kanibalem Dufkem ("Vacation with

cannibal Dufek") is said not to "come out of astonishment." Cimrman replied: "Dear Mr. Durman, the theatre
is here mainly so that the spectator shall be astonished. I am sending you five more plays."
Many of Cimrman's unsuccessful plays are reported to be performed by his infamous theatrical group Lipany.
Cimrman's theatre still possesses the original properties from the play Akt (English: "The Nude"), through
which the author himself left the stage. A common way to escape angry or unsatisfied audience was the even
more infamous scene Vichr z hor ("Drift From the Mountains"), allowing the actors to escape swiftly.

APPENDIX

insulation = izolace