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LOVE IS SUPREME

IN
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
A LITTLE HEAVEN ON EARTH
I gratefully acknowledge my debt of love to my dear wife for her love
EVERY WOMAN NEEDS A MAN and support and understanding of my call to serve God. This book could
not have been written without her help as a friend in need and indeed.
Lonah Mokeira may God richly bless you my dear in Jesus name.
LIVE PURPOSELY AND SELFLESSLY

By Apostle Francis Morisi


Thank you.

The Light Centre Ministries, Box 69789-00400, Nairobi, Kenya.


Email: fmorisi@yahoo.com; Phone: 0722-741044. DEDICATION:
Copyright c 2005. By Apostle Francis Morisi
Dedicated to my dear wife Lonah Mokeira Motari. My beloved
All rights are reserved. Unauthorised reproduction, children. My daughters Chrstine and Grace, My sons Moses, Morris,
In any manner is prohibited. Elisha and Emmanuel and All God’s people. God Bless you.

All scriptures are from theLiving Bible unless otherwise.

Printed in Kenya.

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LOVE IS SUPREME IN A LITTLE HEAVEN ON EARTH: CONTENTS: PAGE NO.

CONTENTS: 38. Widows and Marriage……………………………………… .28


PAGE NO. 39. Can a divorced woman or man marry? .................................... 29
. Our Ministry’s home Page…….……………………………. 4 40. Ministers of Mercy…………………………………………… 29
1) Christian Polygamy……………………………………….. 6 41. Traditions & Customs……………………………………… 29
2) Christian Polygamy is Biblical & Legal…………………… 6 42. Divorce……………………………………………………… 30
3) The Biblical Portrayal of Polygamy………………………. 8 43. I wonder which way is safe! ..................................................... 33
4) Patriarchal {Abraham}…………………………………….. 9 44. Keys to effective Ministry……………………………………. 34
5) Esau and Jacob…………………………………………….. 10 45. Religion without Love & Judging & condemning others………. 35
6) Tamar and the Levirate……………………………………. 10 46. Staying Alive Emotionally……………………………………. 36
7) Period of the Law {the Mosaic Code}…………………….. 11 47. Be your own Therapist…………………………………………. 36
8) The King’s Harem…………………………………………. 11 48. You need a health Blend of Emotions………………………….. 36
9) The Levirate Law………………………………………….. 12 49. Why should you encourage a rich Emotional life in others……. 37
10) Judges……………………………………………………… 12 50. Defending God’s grace………………………………………….. 37
11) Ruth and the Levirate……………………………………… 12 51. In which way can you show love to your mate? .......................... ..38
12) Elkanah ……………………………………………………. 13 52. Superiority of Love & its power of Sharing everything………… 38
13) The United Kingdom………………………………………. 13 53. Lovers Forever……………………………………………………..39
14) Saul…………………………………………………………. 13 54. Commitment Produces Endurance…………………………………39
15) David……………………………………………………….. 13 55. Salvation and Testmony………………………………………….. 39
16) Solomon……………………………………………………. 14 56. Love Shares itself with Others…………………………………….39
17) The Divided Kingdom…………………………………….. 16 57. Lovers belong to each other………………………………………. 40
18 Allegory of two Sisters……………………………………. 16 58. Cleave to each other………………………………………………. 40
19. New Testament Comment…………………………………. 16 59. Holy Spirit………………………………………………………… 40
20. Levirate Marriage and the Sadducees……………………….17 60. love Cherish Each other………………………………………….. 40
21. Conclusion ………………………………………………… 17 61. Lovers are romantic………………………………………………. 41
22. Bishop / Deacons / Elders……………………………………19 62. Lovers are lovers –Marital Sex at its Best………………………… 41
23. Be in your own Calling …………………………………… 19 63. God’s calling plan…………………………………………………. 44
24. Marrying or Not marrying ………………………………… 20 64. Day of Rest……………………………………………………….. 45
25. Unlocking the Gate to a wife’s receptiveness………………. 21 65. Sharing Everythimg {Love by Action}………………………….. 45
26. It is about the Ministry ……………………………………. 22 66. As a leader…………………………………………………………46
27. Why does it usually fail? ........................................................ 22 67. Men often go astray……………………………………………… 47
28. Are we becoming supper Spiritual until we forget that we are 68. Yearning to Transform………………………………………….. 48
in the body, Men? ........... ………………………………… 24 69. Unfortunately we have Dream Killers…………………………… 48
29. Our Ladies, what do you have to say? …………………… 26
30. Personal and Pastoral conduct……………………………… 27
31. The coming of apostasy…………………………………… 27
32. The Christian and his conscience. …………………………. 27
34. As a point of punishment –wives given to other men by God.28
35. Types of marriage Ceremonies…………………………….. 28
36. Dowry………………………………………………………. 28
37. Widows, Orphans, the Disabled, the poor, & the Needy…… 28

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Preface workers know how you feel about them? Our superficial friendships will deepen
into warm brotherly or sisterly relationships. Our churches will multiply in
You have done well to take up this book for reading. I believe that it’s a book effectiveness as people discover they can find love where Christ is worshiped.
that all people need now. This is meant to bring a sense of direction and Thank God for people who are tender hearted, without them our lives could be barren
understanding in the Christian world concerning Christian polygamy, Widows, and unfulfilling. Thank Him also that we can all grow in tenderness even those of us
divorcees, orphans the poor and the needy families. I trust that you will find it a great who are naturally tough. Remember that all human beings are God’s beloved
help. Get to know what the Bible says rather than what our individual denominations creations, and all are invited to receive forgiveness at the cross.
say. The Bible speaks. If you grasp this truth you will begin to see people and treat them tenderly. We will
1 Cor. 8: 2 if any one thinks that he knows anything, he knows nothing yet as he oath see people as potential brothers and sisters. Remember that even Hotheads matter to
to know. Ladies stop being possessive and selfish open up; men stop being mean God. And God’s treasures should be treated tenderly.
and open up. Don’t be selfish. Treat others as you want to be treated. Wear one another’s shoes
I am a pointed by God as an Apostle and a missionary to the poor and the needy and go for a mile, and feel where it hurts. Take your time to understand another’s
families in our churches, the neglected Widows and the assumed Christian problem and see how you can help him/her out.
polygamous marriges and families which operate behind the scenes and yet they are Get the facts at any price and hold on tightly to all the good sense you can get. And
divinely instituted and encouraged. Behold how many of our single sisters and you shall know the Truth and the Truth shall set you Free. Every Woman Needs a Man
widows are in our churches and in need of marriage but who cares? Yet if these in this World. Love is Supreme.
Ladies marry outside the church we are left blaming, judging and condemning. Let’s have a Little Heaven on Earth. Live purposely and Selflessly as Jesus Christ did
You’ve got to have a sense of humour to think you can get a way with telling and even as the first Christians did Sharing everything even selling their pocessions
women to share their husbands. and brought the proceeds of the things that were sold, and laid them to the Apostle’s
None is willing to discuss this for fear of being thought as somehow unclean. Mark feet and they distributed to each as anyone had need. Nor was there anyone among
you I have witnessed single ladies who loved the Lord, release years of bent up them who lacked. Acts. 4:32-35.
frustrations. It is difficult for a woman to say to her best friend, “Oh, by the way, Now then how do you treat yourself? How do you want to be treated by others? Do
how about we share your husband, would you mind? If our lives are to be what the exactly that to your neighbour. John 17:20-26. I pray that they all may be one just as
Lord wants them to be, we MUST be OPEN to His WILL whatever it may be. we are one. The love with which you loved me may be in them. The entire Bible is
There are wives who could never be happy until they chained the very thought about love. God is Love. If you have Love, you have God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit;
of their husbands! Selfish!! Isn’t it? Watch out the words of Isaiah 4:1 hence Heaven is your home.
We need the Holy Ghost to intervene and confirm this message to you. Courage! Finally two are better than one, three even better. Also on a cold night, two
Courage! Finally a man is willing to be Lord of his Wives. under the same blanket gain warmth from each other, but how can one be warm
Now my final word is this, “virtually every Woman, who is willing to submit to a man alone? And one standing alone can be attacked and be defeated, but two can
as her Lord can have a husband.”. stand back –to back and conquer; three is even better, for a three braided cord is
In a nutshell, scripture says that you treat people the way Jesus Christ treats you. not easily broken.
When you pray, the Lord listens attentively to every word you say. Why not treat your Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12 and 1 Kings 1: 1-2 {the Living Bible}.
spouses, children friends and co-workers the same way? Slow down, turn off your Courage! Courage! Courage! Finally a man is willing to be Lord of his Wives.
Television, and close out any distractions and say”. I am going to listen because I Now my final word is this, virtually every woman who is willing to submit to a
really want to hear what you have to say.” man as her lord can have a husband.
When you make a mistake, Jesus lifts you up, Forgives you, and continues to treat Also you will learn more on; MARITAL SEX AT ITS BEST. How you can show
you with love and respect. Why not do the same to the people with whom you live, your partner love. You have never discovered that your bedroom can be one of the
work and worship with? When you feel lonely and insecure, the Holy Spirit stays by best recreations in the world.
your side, comforts you and assures you of God’s Love. I wonder! Can a normal preacher preach to a hungry person? Or can he preach when
Why not give Comfort and support to the people you love when they are going hungry? The church has lost its Vision. It has lost touch on the Society. Worry!
through difficult Times? Isa. 43: 4; John. 15: 15; Matt. 28: 20;Psm 103: 13. Worry! Worry! Everywhere. *Loneliness of unmarried men and women {a person
If God does not want His children wondering whether or not they are loved, why
not express your own affections regularly so that your family, friends, and co-
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burning in passion in need of marriage} * Infertility in many families {a people in of his word and the transformation that occurs when that moment happens. Peter was
need of children} fisherman who became a disciple. He was self absorbed and denied Christ. But
 A need for many wives and many children. because he had found a spiritual home, God could work in him so that He could later
 Uncared for widows* Divorcees trembling in the balance work through him. The last thing people need is another building called church, they
 Lack of peace in married couples * Living with unsaved partner. need a spiritual home. Home is palace where you are, you can get help, and you can
 Uncared for orphans * Hunger and thirst * Poverty * Uncared for disabled get nourishment and rest. Home is a place where you can mess up and get back on
people. track. Home is a place where you can invite a stranger and he can feel at peace and be
 And many personal worries, family; matters, political, social and spiritual. safe from a storm. God has released in me the principles of these verses for afresh
Unless the church starts to deal with these situations the preaching will be like a approach to corporate and personal ministry. The Light centre ministries will be a
noisy empty drum. But if such issues are addressed, People will be settled, have peace place where God’s presence and power will be the centre –piece of gathering. It is a
and be attentive to listen to the Gospel, take in do what it says. Jesus fed many: John place where the transformation can take place personally and publlicy. It is spiritual
6: 1-14; Luke 9:12-17; Early Christians shared everything. Acts. 4:32-35. Share one house where all people, regardless of age or socio-economic background can know
another’s troubles and problems. Gal: 6: 2-5. Preacher, ask yourself why you are God intimately, worhip Him passionately and follow Him radically.
preaching. Do you just want to be listened to? What is really the concept of This is the vision of the light centre ministries, not just another church meeting, but a
preachers? Apostle Paul took his time to streamline all issues surrounding family spiritual home for a community, for family and for a person. The light centre ministry
matters, sexual virtues, political, spiritual etc, is a place where God meets people and people meet God. This is a Pentecostal church
Just go a head and search out more. God said: Mine house shall be called a house of prayers for “all people” “Isaiah 56:5-7
(Sincerely in Christ’s service) and mark 11:17
Pro. 18: 15. The intelligent man is always open to new Ideas. In fact he looks for God’s will is: Love your God and neighbours as yourself: matt: 22.37-39
them. NB: Don’t live a life short-circuited. Jesus said; Love one another as I have loved you: Joh n 15:12
Your neighbours are all the churches, all religions, your enemies, and all human races.
THE POWER OF CONCEPT. Value people as potential brothers and sisters. We are not a religion; we are Christ’s
THE PURPOSE DRIVEN CHURCH. followers preaching, Unity, Love and about God’s mercy for the salvation of all the
A PLACE WHERE DREAMS BECOME A REALITY. people from all human races.
The word Christian means Christ’s follower but not religion.
KEEP IT REAL Again I say we are not a religion. We are Christ’s followers preaching unity, Love and
God’s mercy for the salvation of all the people from all human races.
OUR MINISTRY’S HOME PAGE All the people shall see God’s Salvation. Luke 3:6
We need your help, and to help us make this church your (congregation). The church
When we think of “Church” most of us think of a building but few think of people A that we are preaching about is your church, it is considered as one church “the church
building itself without people has no life, but when it is occupied by people with a of Jesus Christ”. Jesus said peter. Upon this rock I will build my Church and the gates
purpose its influence can be powerful. of hell shall not prevail against it. Mathew 16:18.
When people have a divine purpose, their influence is supernatural and when God We are asking you to love one another. We are preaching the word of God and his
ordains their mission they are no longer moving according to their plans but according commandments and for the unity of all the churches into one church for the love and
to His plans. the race of our lord God and his son Jesus Christ.
Jesus said to his disciple, Peter, “Upon this rock I will build my church and the gates Please pray to the Lord God in the name of his son Jesus, for the unity of all religions
of hell shall not prevail against it. “Mathew 16:18. What was the “rock “Jesus was that exist in this world;
speaking of? The rock was the truth that he was the Son of God and the power that To feed the poor, heal the sick, Lead the lost, and for the gathering of all the churches
came from Peter recognising who He was. It was a transforming moment for Peter. of the Lord Jesus into one church and to preaching the peaceful Gospel to all human
My friend this is the picture God has given me. Not a church building but a spiritual races. Please pray for peace for all the nations of this world and for Israel also.
place where, just like Peter, moments of transformation occur as the truth is revealed Jesus said” and I say to you, ask it shall be given to you; seek and you shall find,
and recognised. Based on John 1:4-9. The Light Centre ministry is a vision of a place knock and it shall be opened unto you. For everyone that asks receives and to him that
where people experience the truth. The truth of God’s presence and power, the truth knocks it shall be opened”. Luke 11:9-10
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We believe in one God, one baptism, and in one bible; we are not an organised religion Jesus said forgive and you shall be forgiven, if you do not forgive, heavenly father will
we are Christ’s followers. not forgive you. To have peace and love in our hearts we must forgive.
We are united with all the churches from all denominations and with all religion that Pray to God and pray always, give always to charity.
believe in one God the creator. We don’t believe in divisions. It will be blessing Obey God’s commandments and increase in the acts of love, forgiveness, and
when we see all Christ’s followers worshipping in one church, which is the church of kindness; may God bring redemption and peace to the world by your faith and by your
Jesus. It is blessing to see all human races united and living in harmony and in peace, good deeds?
believing in one God. Christ followers must be as one family, and Jesus’ churches must be one church also.
From the beginning of the early church Jesus’ disciples weren’t preaching religion and But Christ’s followers today have different divisions and religions. Jesus said; “every
not even performing a religion. The people named them as Christ’s followers, but not kingdom divided is brought to desolation and every city or house divided against shall
as organised religion. They were preaching about Jesus’ birth, death and resurrection not stand.” Matherw12:25 Jesus didn’t preach divisions for religions. Jesus preached
basing according the old Testaments prophecies. After seventeen years of Jesus’ unity, love, and forgiveness. Jesus preached about obeying God’s law in full. Jesus
resurrection Paul repented and joined Jesus’ disciples to preach about Christianity. said: “it is easier for earth and heaven to pass than one jot of the law to fail”. Luke
The book of Acts 11:26 tell us {they assembled them with the church, and taught 16:16-17. Jesus said; “Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or title shall no wise pass
people much, and the disciples were named Christians in the city of “Antioch”} from the law.” Mathew 5:18. We don’t’ see that heaven and earth pass yet, for this
We are for the countries preaching about God’s love and his kingdom and about his reason we obey the law. No one is perfect and we all sinned against God. According
son Jesus to all human races, and to all the churches. Jesus said: The foxes have holes, God’s law none could enter his kingdom. It means that humanity would be
and the birds of the air have nests, but the son of man has no where to lay his head, condemned to the second death, for this reason God decided to save the world by
Mathew 8; 20. We love all the peoples, all churches, and all religions, Jesus said: love giving us his grace and mercy. God’s grace is when he sent his only begotten son
your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with thy entire mind. This is Jesus (the Lamb of God) to redeem us from our sins to replace the method of sacrifices
the first and Great commandment and the second is like unto it, Thou shall love thy and the death penalty. All the titles of the law still exist but the method of offerings or
neighbour as thyself, Mathew 22:37-39 sacrifices were replaced by Jesus’ death on the cross.
The church is not a room or a building with a cross on the top of its roof, the church is In heaven religions don’t exist. God shall judge according to our deeds, behaviours,
a congregation. The church bases on love, and unity and peace. It is deplorable to see and our obedience to his commandments, but not according to our religions.
the Christians “Christ’s followers” disown this love and this unity. Jesus said; “Not everyone that says Lord Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven,
Jesus said to his disciples; heal the Sick, Cleanse the lepers, Raise the dead, and cast but who does the will of my father that is in heaven.” Jesus commanded us to love all
out devils. Freely you have received, freely give, Mathew 10:8 people including the ones that hate us. He commanded us to bless them and to pray for
Don’t break Jesus’ commandments, Jesus said, and thy Neighbour as thyself, Mathew them. Mathew 5:38-46, Mathew 22:37-39
22:38-39 When you pray ask God to clarify the following scriptures to you: For if you forgive
Please invite us and we shall come to you with the massage of love and unity. men their trespasses, your heavenly father shall also forgive your trespasses. Matthew
Jesus said; Love another as I have loved you, John 15:12 Jesus loves us as sinners and 6:14-15. Jesus said Love your enemies, and do good, lend hoping for nothing again
not as perfect beings. and your reward shall be in Heaven.
We love all the peoples knowing that no one is perfect. God alone is perfect. Do not Yes we go to all the churches and to all the synagogues. We go to places where sinners
think that we are not claiming Jesus’ blood for the remission of our sins. We believe in are top, reach the world and bring the lost souls Christ for their salvation.
one baptism and we were baptised in the name of the father, the son, and the Holy They said to Jesus’disciples, “why does your master eat with publicans and sinners?”
Spirit.We don’t believe in getting baptism every time we tend to a different But when Jesus heard that he said unto them, “It is not those who are healthy who need
congregation (church) because there is one church only and baptism (if done by a physician, but those who are sick”. But go and learn what that mean, I will have
Immersing in much water).The Bible tells us that we should be baptised in the name of mercy and not sacrifice for I am not come to call the righteous but sinners to
the father and the son and The Holy Spirit. It was never mentioned in the Bible that repentance.” Matthew 9:11-13.
we should get baptised in the authority of the religions and the denominations.
To care we must love, and to love we must forgive. Love comes because we forgive.
When we forgive it is because we have love, and it means that we really forgave. But
if we say that we forgave but we have no love, it means we did not really forgive.

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CHRISTIAN POLYGAMY: We are not seeking to be popular ourselves in fact we only accept the Holy Bible as
We preach Christ crucified, unto the Jews a stumbling block, and unto the Greeks our guide to what Christian marriage is and what it is not.
foolishness. Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God. Because the Welcome and enjoy!
foolishness of God is wiser than men: and the weakness of God is stronger than men.
For you see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not CHRISTIAN POLYGAMY IS LEGAL!
many mighty, not many noble are called. But of him are you in Christ Jesus, who of
God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption; You heard it right! Christian polygamy is legal! You can have many wives in
that according as it’s written, He that gloried let him glory in the Lord. 1 Corinthians Christian polygamy one at a time or two at a time or three. Even if you don’t have
1:23-31. marriage certificates you will be married according to the Bible to each of these wives.
Now the spirit speaks expressly, that in the later times some shall depart from the You will have had a public ceremony and celebration. And although the civil
faith, giving heed to seducing spirit, and doctrines of the devil: speaking lies in authorities will not consider you married, you will be married to each of them
hypocrisy, having their conscience seared with a hot iron; Forbidding to marry…… according to the bible and therefore according to God. This is the way of Christian
1 Timothy 4:1-3 polygamy. It should be the way of all marriages. There is no reason to allow the
We are a Christian marriage Ministry seeking to correct the many myths that government to interject themselves into our Christian marriages. Unless one of the
surround what Christian marriage is and what Christian marriage is not. This ministry wives is below the age of legal age of marriage in your country then you are free of the
uses scripture and scripture only to expose the glaring errors and the not so obvious Government intrusion into your Christian marriages.
errors that are found in the most Christian theology books when it comes to Christian The lord says “May the marriage bed be blessed” so let’s count on the blessing of the
marriage. Our Christian marriage Ministry is also involved in exposing the errors lord not the blessings of the Government on our marriages. Let’s celebrate our
taught in some of today’s popular ministries. This ministry is directed towards couples freedom to marry without Government intrusion, legally! It was Jesus, who said”
who are considering marrying, singles, and married men. What God has joined let no man separate” and infact, no man other than husband has
Some men have been created by God in such away tha their lives are complete without the authority to divorce according to the Bible.The requirement is not a civil
additional wives. authority’s stamp of approval to be valid? In 1corth 7:15 what divorce in the Bible
Some men however are driven by the very nature that God endowed them with to simply required that a man write her a bill of Divorcement. Now, certainly Jesus
have more physical exchange than is comfortable for their current wife or wives as the clarified this, as not to include any and every reason. Yet he allowed it for fornicaiton
case may be God did not create such men to have just one wife. He created them to which includes many sins short of adultery Matt: 5:31-32 so the requirements to
have many wives and many children. For them not to follow this path is to follow a divorce your wife are greater than what a “no-fault” state would require but muchless
path of ascetism and self denial, shame on you if you dare judge men who have been than some churches claim. So what if you want to divorce your wife quietly and your
given by God an extra high level of testosterone. Men in their 30s, 40s and 50s and divorce is Biblical? Should you require dragging your wife through the mud in order
older, who feel no less desire for women than they did when they were 20 and whose to divorce her? No, for authority to “write her a Bill of Divorcement” is yours.
drive in their 20s was triple the average man’s drive. So we have two primary sins going on within the churches concerning marriages.
You cannot imagine what is like to go through life with the drive of an 18 or 20 year First, the lack of proper record keeping, preventing adultery within our churches.
old and be yoked with someone who has one seventh that drive. We are called upon to Secondly, twisting of the Bible to take away the husband’s sole authority for divorcing
judge wisely concerning this. The Bible allows a man to have more than one wife. his wife. We will correct those as best as we can.
Remember once again what the Bible states. Another word for evangelicals and fundamentalist who continue to follow the
Now the spirit speaks expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from world; you let pagans tell you how to behave in matters of marriage. You fear your
faith, giving heed to seducing spirit, and doctrines of the devil; Speaking lies in Bible for it tells you the true nature of marriage and the requirements for Divorce.
hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron: Forbidding to Your wives, who rule over you as prophesied in Isaiah 3:12, they cause you to error.
marry………………………..1 Timothy 4: 1-3. Many women live as adulteresses and are welcomed into your fellowship. They enter
This book seeks to correct the myths surrounding what Christian marriage is not. new relationships that cannot be called marriages. 1 Corinthians 7:15 a wife can
We will be exposing some glaring errors and some not so obvious are found in most divorce a husband who does not believe and the reverse is true. Therefore a sister or a
Christian theological books concerning Christian marriage as well as errors taught in brother is not in bondage Exodus 21:10 (divorce) a lady is free to leave a man if that
some of today’s most popular ministries that are directed toward couples. man fails to meet her needs (food, clothing and marriage rights).

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A man who tells the world that he wants more wives will nearly always experience wife face persecution. These men claim that the desire for intimacy had nothing to do
great persecution from his wife! This is obviously not the type of persecution we with their taking more wives. If that is so, imagine the poor additional wives
have come to associate with religious persecution. And yet, it’s extremely painful. If undesired! Of course we know this is not the case. Another reason why they do this is
you have endured this kind of persecution then you know that is more painful than if because their wives financially support them; imagine two wives to support you. They
you had been put in stocks in the public square. You have been looked upon with should try very much to support themselves and their wives. Some ministers are so
hatred by your wife and been told that you must pretend that your God given urges, hypocritical.
which you are convinced can only be righteously satisfied by having more than one We can no longer allow the Gospel taught as medieval traditions as forced
wife, are dirty. monogamy which has the effect of invalidating the word of God” Mark 7:13. We
Maybe this is you who has kept a painful silence or maybe you’re simply seeking the wonder how many other doctrines of demons, 1 Timothy 4:1-3 continue in todays so
truth. Whatever your situation is, Biblical doctrine can help you. However, there are called Bible Believing Churches. Medieval and unbiblical theologies should not be
men among us, polygamists, who claim to be ministers but make a mockery of it. They given a place of honour in the church that is called a Christian Church. Laymen as
preach to be popular and not to make God’s work known. They make hypocritical and well as clergy can no longer be fooled by high sounding titles and degrees into
ascetic pronouncements that compound the pain of the men dealing with un- thinking that the traditions of man are taken from the Bible when they are not. We
supportive wives. Why would they do this? They have theirs. They have already have access to Greek and Hebrew translations of the Bible as never before. Am I to
acted on their need. Now they have become pious on their pronouncements and blind believe that a degree in theology makes a man holy? Certainly not. We are not
to the reality that a man with a need for more than one wife face. These men claim “promoting” polygamy nor discouraging polygamy. We are promoting the completion
that the desire for intimacy had nothing to do with their taking more wives. of the reformation movement and the freedom to marry. For whatever reason, the
If that is so, imagine the poor additional wives undesired! Of course we know this reformed churches exchanged the tyranny of the Roman Church for the tyranny of the
is not the case. Some so-called ministers are living this kind of lie! government. From that point, the reformed churches accepted the civil authorities
They’re not even men enough to support themselves and their wives. ruling on the validity of the marriages and divorce even though Jesus said that no man
Some have got their additional wives and now they want to stop others from taking has such authority. There is no law that says a church must accept the validity of the
additional wives by preaching their so-called one-wife doctrines. Worst of all, they divorce decree issued by the government nor is there any law that says a church must
claim that if you are not” called of God” to take another wife that you are committing accept a marriage deemed valid by the government. Marrying more than one wife is
a sin! not illegal. And let me put it that there should be freedom of marriage all over the
They speak against Rome and Matriarchy and yet they are more dependent on women world for marriage is a divine institution and not man made. We adjure you to
than the average monogamist ministers. Can you imagine a minister claiming that you exercise your freedom to read and declare what the Bible says and to live by it. We
must be “called of God” to take a second wife. ask that you participate with us in making sure that the reformation is accomplished.
Both declarations are unscriptural and UNholy. God provided a wife as Adam’s Adoption is less cruel than abortion but polygamy is the Biblical way to give a child
helpmate. It was Adam’s need that led God to provide a wife for him. a home. Don’t remove a child from his mother before giving a serious consideration
Many of you participate in the sins of the cults to justify your condemnation of to marrying her mother. If you adopt, be certain that mother really is planning to
marriages which God had never condemned! abandon or abort her child and wouldn’t accept polygamy or you’re stealing the
Forcing monogamy upon laymen is part of the mediaeval theology based on the woman’s child! Why do we criticise some of those who practise polygamy, the
traditions and teaching of men. marital state that we believe may be for us? Because we must prevent polygamy
Forced celibacy for priest came out of this mediaeval tradition. There are three from becoming, a cover for immorality.
forms of chastity spoken of in the Bible and which are acceptable to this day; Neither marriage to one wife, nor marriage too many wives should be used as cover
Celibacy, monogamy, and biblical polygamy (one man married to more than one for immorality. So what should men with more than one wife who are laying claim to
woman). We are here to lend support and Biblical doctrine that can help you. the ministry do? They should support their wives through the guise of the ministry.
However, there are men among us, polygamists, who claim to be ministers but make a They should separate from those wives who have not been divorced according to the
mockery of it. They preach to be popular and not to make God’s work known. They scripture from their former husband.They should withdraw from the ministry rather
make hypocritical and ascetic pronouncements that compound the pain of the men than change their ministry for they have been liars. Finally, they should confess
dealing with unsupportive wives. Why would they do this? They have theirs. They publicly that their ministry has been nothing more than an attempt to earn a living. All
have already acted on their need to have more wives. Now they have become pious on we need to do is fight this enemy that works mostly in women: SELFISHNESS,
their pronouncements and blind to the reality that men with a need for more than one PRIDE, STRIVE, ENEVY, AND HATRED.
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Because of the tremendous amount of the unscriptural and unscrupulous Noah and his immediate family. If its line was being cited as a whole and as a
misinformation that has been given out by other so called ministries to the polygamous culmination of Godliness in Enoch (in contrast to Lamech)
families, we have chosen NOT to be a ministry to already polygamous. You don’t The world should have hard a large godly population by Enoch’s time. Obviously
need a ministry such as this. You have your family and your wives. Grow up; you’ve only one particularly line of Seth’s descendants was being traced for the apparent
got more than one wife! You better be grown up! On the other hand, men who seek purpose of arriving at the individual through whom God would establish his
polygamy but whose wives are hostile to the idea are isolated, alone, and often covenants.
distraught. Cain’s descendants or any other hypothetical line would naturally appear deficient in
This ministry is for them. Such men typically have wives whose reaction to the contrast with the development of a select line leading to the few righteous men left on
concept of polygamy is so great that they never broach the subject again. Many lived the earth. It should be simply denoted that the line of Seth become more select and
in nearly intolerable marriages since the moment they brought up the concept of therefore fewer representatives as it was developed.
polygamy, even in theory. They often fear the loss of their wife, children, and even Leech’s violence and arrogance are contrasted with Enoch’s goodness through
their business, in the event of the civil divorce. It is sad that marriage has come to positioning within the genesis genealogies. Development wich proceeded from
mean submission to women in today’s world. But for many, that is the case. For such Lamech and which are important to the human race are likewise emphasized by
men, there is hope! This is a starting point for many of you. For others, it’s a last structure and expansion in the genealogies of Genesis five and eleven (5and 11).
resort in your request to feel whole. We will work together to pray and make you Each genealogy includes Ten Names, Noah being the tenth from Adam, and
whole again. Terah the tenth from Noah. And each ends with a father having three sons, as
likewise the case with the cainite geneology (Gen 4:17-22). The Sethite genealogy
THE BIBLICAL PORTRAYAL OF POLYGAMY (Chapter five) culminates in its seventh member, Enoch, who “walked with God, and
Lamech. he was not, for God took him”. The cainite geneology also culminates in its seventh
The first recorded instance of polygamy in the Bible is Lamech, who married two member, Lamech.
wives, Adah and Zillah (Gen 4:19-25). Being the first such instance is often given a The three sons of Lamech represent three permanent social divisions or modes of life
place of the importance as the introduction to the subject of polygamy. consisting of life, consisting of nomadic shepherds (those who dwell in tents and have
Lamech is in the line of Cain and boast concerning his ability to enact vengeance, and livestock), musicians (those who play lyre and pipe, and metal workers (the forger of
as a result these negative elements are often seen as art of the original and the all implementation of bronze and iron). Commentators sometimes claim that these
foundational comment of polygamy. Thus a Precedent is set by some for the developments are evil, apparently deducting such from the evil character of Lamech.
interpretation of the subsequent passages. That these social division or elements of civilisation are evil of themselves is highly
Agreement exist concerning the character of Lamech reveals a harsh spirit of revenge questionable, however, and certainly cannot be maintained as evil elsewhere in
which is preserved in poetic form (Gen 4:23, 34). He boasts of his ability to execute scripture. In addition, there is no indication that these trades are put to an evil use
vengeance upon a young man who struck him, to the extent that he slays the young here.
man and then boasts that his retribution is sevenfold times greater than the sevenfold In many religious prominent features of social life and cultural are traced back to
vengeance promised for Cain. The parallel with Cain is evident in the Leech’s mention gods or semi-divine heroes… It’s in keeping with the strongly monotheistic ethos of
of him and the intensification of violence and arrogance are also apparent. The further the Old Testament that traces such factors to purely human origin, the sons of Lamech
suggested interrelationship between the violent, arrogant Lamech and other element contrary to the Babylonian and the Canaanite mythologies, civilisation begun with
sin the geneology is what needs the futher clarification. There appears to be substance men, not with gods as those mythologies assert.
to the idea that Lamech is contrasted with Enoch. The Sumerian king list ascribes these cultural developments to gods or the demigods.
The cainite line calumniated with the portrayal of the violent and the arrogant Besides being the apologetic against polytheism, the geneology also fits into the
Lamech, paralleling his violent ancestor Cain, and possibly implying the lines as a literary flow of the book as progressive history:
whole is being cited. Lamech the sixth generation from the Adam in Cain’s line, The reference to Lamech’s two wives generally best ascribed to the overall importance
has contrasting counterpart in Enoch, the sixth generation from Adam in Seth’s of the three sons and the importance of the sons resulted in an expanded record of
line. Lamech’s family. Both women had distinguished children.
It should be noted though between Enoch and Noah, the man of God, there are only More especially the heads of the three historical divisions came from different
two generations (Gen 5:21-32) and yet the whole earth had become corrupt except for women, two from Adah and one from Zillah, so that both mothers are cited to identify
the historical and human origin of the sons in an apologetic against heathen deities.
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The expanded episode of Lamech would serve the same purpose but his humanity and suggestions have been posted. It usually suggested that Keturah had been Abraham’s
separation from God would be emphasised for one whose sons we erroneously concubine but was promoted to wife after Sarah’s death.
identified as mythological gods. Note also that Lamech’s family was precisely This is a good explanation for a change in status from concubine to wife that, as far
identified more than any other family in the comparable genealogies by giving the as that time element, a combination of grammatical and chronological considerations
names of his two wives, three sons and a daughter. makes it just as possible that Keturah was promoted to wife while SARAH was still
A lesser matter but one that deserves some comment is the common belief that the living. In the final analysis, neither the time element nor the technical status of the
case of Lamech was the first historical case of polygamy. Obviously Lamech’s wives changes the result of polygamous household, rather it addresses whether
polygamy is the earliest recorded case, but nothing more certain can be said as Abraham had two primary wives concurrently.
polygamy’s historical beginning. There was clearly a population apart from the Abraham’s actions with regard to his offspring and the inheritances subsequently
individual mentioned in the geneologies. The time periods comprising the generation help to explain Abraham’s motivation in receiving Hagar. A childless couple would
from Adam to Lamech is not known, but the probability is that it represents more that adopt one of their servants as heir, as Abraham adopted Eliezer his servant (Gen.15).
an actual six generations and other cases of polygamy might well have occurred. Also, the wife might produce an heir through her handmaid which explains Sarah’s
initiative in giving Hagar to Abraham (Gen.16). If a couple then had a son of their
PATRIARCHAL own, he automatically displaced the handmaid’s son as Isaac displaced Ishmael
ABRAHAM (Gen.15:4, 17:18-21). Since the handmaid and her son should not normally be sent
away after the birth of the true heir, Abraham received divine direction on the matter
The next Biblical occurrences of polygamy are those of Abraham’s family. Of Terah’s before he sent Hagar and Ishmael away according to Sarah’s request Gen.21:9-14).
three sons, Abram, Noah and Harlan (Gen.11:26-27), at least two had concubines. The best that can be determined then is that Abraham’s actions and thoughts
Abraham had at least two (Gen.25:6) Noah had one (Gen.22:24) no information is concerning marriage fit into the social pattern of his environment. He naturally
recorded about Haran except that he was the father of Lot and died in Ur. Since understood God’s promise of an heir and many descendants (Gen.12:2, 7, 13:15-16,
Abraham married his half sister Sarah, the daughter of his father but not the daughter 15:2-5, 18) within his cultural context, for the son of the handmaid met the
of his mother (Gen.20:12), it is also probable, given the ancient context and the qualification of an Heir from his own body (Gen.15:4) “one shall come forth from
practice of his sons, that Terah had concubines or multiple wives. your own; he shall be your heir”. Gen.21:13 “and of the son of the maid will make a
As to the number and identity of Abraham’s concubines and wives, the number was nation also because he is your seed”. Abraham did not understand that a miraculous
three (Wife Sarah and two concubines), but beyond that there is uncertainty. Gen, birth through Sarah was the intent of God’s promise until Ishmael was thirteen
25:6 mentions Abraham’s “concubines” which some commentators limit to the two (Gen.17:15), but rather he expected the promise to be fulfilled through Ishmael
identified elsewhere by the name of Hagar and Keturah. (Gen.17:18).
Information upon which to base a further conclusion is not specific although it can The pronouncement of Isaac’s birth made clear that Abraham had erred in regard to
generally, be said that in accordance with the custom of the day and in light of the exact and miraculous nature of the promise, and it’s this point which the New
Abraham’s possession of two certain concubines, it would not be seen unusual for Testament expands to contrasts the son of promise, Isaac, with the natural son, Ishmael
Abraham to have more than these. The approximate extent of Abraham’s household (Gal.4:22).
and wealth on the basis of Abraham’s ability to raise up an army of 318 arm-bearing Abraham is further blessed in Ishmael (Gen.17:20, 21, 13, 21:20) and took another
servants, all born in his house (Gen.14:14-15). We must assume that Abraham’s concubine Keturah (Gen.25:1) appears to reflect a sign of blessings as he increases in
household must have consisted of at least a thousand persons if not more. All we can posterity even in later years.
legitimately conclude from the Biblical narratives is that, Abraham must have been a On the other hand, the domestic friction created between Sarah and Hagar is obvious
very powerful master in his days. in the narrative. Trouble commences after Ishmael’s conception (Gen.16:4) resulting
The number of Abraham’s concubines beyond those identified in scripture is in Hagar’s flight, and again at Isaac’s weaning (Gen.21:8), resulting in her permanent
conjectural, though. Both Pharaoh (Gen. 12:15) and Abimelech (Gen.20:2) of expulsion. However, as will be seen in surveying other polygamous marriages,
Abraham’s day had harems into which they tried to incorporate Sarah. domestic friction emerges as a theme, which suggests a corporate and inherent
As to the order of Abraham’s concubines and wives, it is apparent that Sarah was problem. Since the existence of such a theme cannot be substantiated until the
taken as wife, and Hagar and Keturah in that order, were added as concubines. polygamous instances are viewed, and since this significance of such theme is better
Keturah is cited as Abraham’s wife in Genesis 25:1 but she is clearly called “his analysed with the combined data, problems of domestic strife will be noted as such.
concubines” in 1Chronicles 1:32, presenting a chronological problem to which several
9
Esau and Jacob recognised by writers on the subject, where from historical, sociological or Biblical
Esau married two wives who made life miserable for his parents (Gen.26:34-35). perspective.
The displeasures voiced concerning these marriages was against the cannite identity As relates to the actual Biblical instances of the levirate, the few cases that are
bearing in mind the idea that two foreign wives were particularly unbearable. recorded may or may not have individually been polygamous; however, theses cases
Marriage to non related women, violated the standard code of endogamy, marriage are included within the citation of the polygamous texts since evidence suggests that
contracted within one’s own kin group. Esau’s selection of foreign women had also the levirate institution be necessarily intertwined with polygamy.
been a violation of his father’s role in selection of bride. “Only a disobedient son, the In examining the working of the institution in Biblical setting and in gaining insight
recalcitrant and rebellious one, would marry a woman of his own choice without the into God’s involvement in the levirate custom, one would expect that the divine
prior consent of his father. attitude towards this basically polygamous institution could be clarified. The account
Esau’s grandfather Abraham was very careful to take a wife for Isaac from among involving Tamar in Genesis 38 cites the death of Judah’s wife (Gen. 38:12) and thus
Abraham’s relatives and not from the surrounding Canaanite (Gen.24:2-4, 37-40). does not appear to be the case of polygamy. However, the account does give
Endogamy was likewise very important to Isaac and Rebecca. And Rebecca said to important insight into the working of the levirate texts, Deuteronomy 25 and the book
Isaac, “I am tired of living because of the daughters of Heth: if Jacob takes a wife from of RUTH. Although there were other levirate practises surrounding cultures, Genesis
the daughters of Heth, like these, from the daughters of the land, what good will my 38 resembles the Hittites practises in the order of the persons under levirate obligation.
life be to me (Gen.27:46). Possibly the Hittites pattern reflected a more widespread custom of levirate obligation.
When Esau saw that the daughter’s of Canaanite displeased his father, he took his At least the obligation in Genesis 38 passed own according to the pattern; from Onan
third wife from the house of Ishmael (Gen.28:8-9) in a step designed on its the eldest brother in-law to Shelah the young brother in-law, and when it became
endogamous nature to gain approval of his parents. Esau’s genealogy with three wives obvious that Judah was improperly withholding Shelah TAMAR deceived Judah the
is found in Genesis 36:1. father of the deceased and obligatory into fulfilling the duty. While TAMAR waited
Eliphaz, Esau’s son also had a concubine (Gen.36:12). for Shelah without result, circumstances came about which enabled TAMAR deceive
Jacob married two wives; Leah and Rachel,(sisters) and in accordance with his Judah; his wife died shortly there after he left the household to join his sheep shearers
father’s instructions (Gen.28:6) the selection was made from among his family’s (Gen.38:12). Tamar apparently utilised Judah’s subsequent lack of companionship
relatives. At the instigation of the wives (Gen.29:30), he had children by the maids and enticed him along the way under the pretence of participation in the fertility cult.
and thus added two concubines to his household. The Levirate custom as it appears here was a reflection of ancient custom, preceding
Jacob wrestled with God and God blessed him and called him Israel. The same type of the Mosaic Code. Thus this custom of Levirate marriage was founded upon divine
strife and jealousy flared up between co-wives, Leah and Rachel as occurred between command but upon ancient tradition. That the obligation was of compulsory nature,
wife Sarah and concubine Hagar. however, is partly evidenced by Onan’s pretence at marriage while not being able to
The issue of fertility was again at the heart of the matter, but in this case the two openly refuse the obligation. God enforced the obligation of the levirate duty as it
wives used their maids to supplement their fertility in competition with one another existed before the mosaic legislation by the punishment of death upon Onan who
whereas Sarah used Hagar to replace her infertility. Later Jacob’s son Reuben caused refused to consummate his duty (Gen.38:9-10). That duty applied even for a brother
a scandal by lying with his father’s concubine Bilhah (Gen.25:22). He lost his first- who had been so evil that God had previously taken that one’s life (Gen.38:7-8). The
born rights as a result (Gen.49:3-4), although ironically he may have been trying to serenity of Onan’s punishment was due to his pretence and deception in connection
secure those rights by his action. with the levirate duty; Onan’s severe punishment is explainable in the light of his act
NB: Mark you Israel (Jacob) the loved and chosen one of God was a polygamous on deception in rejecting the levirate duty, and it would be unwise here to generalise
man. and presume that all cases refusal of the levirate were similarly dealt with as it would
to suggest that in the early churches all cases of lying were dealt with in the same
TAMAR AND THE LEVIRATE manner as that of Anania and Sapphira. However, as the moral of the story supports
Genesis 38 contains a story about the widely practised customs of the levirate the Levirate institution, so God’s action should also be viewed in the light of the
marriage. “Levirate” is derived from Latin “Levir” (a husband’s brother, a brother in institution and the moral and not separated to relate only to the evil of deception and
-law) and denotes the customs whereby a dead man’s brother or next closest relative the individual Onan.
was obliged to marry a widow. The relevance of levirate marriage to the subject of The primary purpose of the Levirate marriage in Genesis 38 was the raising up of the
polygamy is that the levirate was a mandated form of polygamy, as is widely seed for the dead brother (Gen.38:8-9).

10
This is in accord with the cultural importance of establishing progeny; for a man not himself… Deut. 17:16a. In addition, trade with Egypt in the acquisition of horses
to leave his seed behind meant a death almost as the personal as his own bodily Deut. 17:17b was forbidden possibly to keep Israel from imitating Egypt of becoming
demise. Some suggest that inheritance rights may also have been in view and that dependent upon foreigners.
Onan was judged partially for coveting his brother’s inheritance, thus seeking to The prohibition against taking many wives (Deut. 17: 17) was likewise aimed at
secure the rights of primogeniture by failing to produce an heir for his brother,. preventing the imitation of foreign practises that would hinder confidence in God.
Although this is quite possible, property succession is nowhere mentioned in the Security was customarily enhanced through foreign alliances and sealing the treaties
narrative. by marriages of the children of the kings.
Period of the Law These marriages helped to produce stable relationships between the countries and
The Mosaic Code resulted in the king’s harem, the size of which partly depended upon the extent of the
The number of laws among, the mosaic code that directly addressed polygamy were contracted alliances. Since it was recognised that large harem would include a number
relatively few. Marital support of a concubine was protected in the event that the of foreign marriages (and represents foreign alliances), the king was warned not to
husband took an additional wife (Exo.21:7-11). She was guaranteed continued take many wives as a protection against foreign influence; “lest his heart turn away”.
financial support (food, clothing) and conjugal rights or else she was granted her The security in Israel as a nation was to rest upon an alliance with God and not
freedom. Deuteronomy 21:15-17 protected the inheritance of the first born in the case confidence in foreign powers.
of two wives, one loved and one unloved. Foreign contracts and resultant influences polluted the nation’s spiritual condition
THE KING’S HAREM and were therefore a threat (Exo.23:31-33, 34:12-16).
Deuteronomy 17:16-17 legislated that the king should not multiply horses, wives or The particular danger of harem, “lest his heart turn away”, was that the king would
gold. It can be observed that this warning was directed at the king specifically as turn to the religions of the wives. This was graphically illustrated with Solomon in
opposed to the general populace. first Kings 11:1-11 where it was emphasized that his foreign wives “turned his heart
First the king had the means to pursue these ends whereas the populace did not, thus away” from God and caused him to go after other gods. See also Nehemiah 13:26;
making them actual temptation for the king, but not real ones for the populace. Such “the foreign women caused even him to sin”.
activities were customary and expected for kings. As with prohibition against horses, so it was with women that excess was being
A richly furnished harem, the accumulation of silver and gold, were inseparably addressed, not the practise of polygamy per se or the formation of the harem. Others
connected with the luxury of the oriental monarchs generally; so that the fear was a also observe it as not prohibition to take more wives than one but to have an
very natural one, that the future king of Israel might follow the general custom of the excessive number; thus in fact legalizing moderate number. The extent of polygamy
heathen in these respect. was limited for the king, not the practise of polygamy forbidden. Furthermore the
Secondly, the king was in a unique position as a leader of the nation, making it all limitations related to foreign wives and resultant foreign alliances so that even a
the more important that this individual remain loyal to God. Serious pursuit of horses, large native harem would not necessarily fall within the confines of this prohibition.
wives or gold would generally reflect distraction of materialism and specifically the The third prohibition he must not accumulate large amount of silver and gold
note of dependency upon the arm of the flesh rather than upon God. The nation could (Deut.17:17b) was also aimed at stopping the king from imitating the excessive of
be expected to go the spiritual way of its leader so these commandments were aimed at oriental monarchs. Dependence for the nation’s provision was to rest upon the
keeping the king spiritually sound. The specific meaning of the particular prohibition covenant relationship with God, and hoarded silver and gold in the royal treasury
(Deut. 17:16-17) and the flow of the larger discourse itself (Deut. 17:14) bear out the could lead to an attitude of self-sufficiency and pride. Again it was not the use of
unique nature of the laws as directed at the king. gold or the existence of royal treasury that was being prohibited, but the problem of
The primary key of the horse was for warfare, and as a symbol of military might, it excess.
was a symbol of military pride. Multiplication of horses by the king of Israel would The flow of the larger discourse (Deut.17:14) emphasizes that the intent of the
foster confidence in military mighty rather than in God. selection was directed towards the dangers of the foreign influence.
Multiplying horses (in context of establishing and strengthening a professional army) This strengthens the view that the prohibitions in Deut.17:16-17 were also aimed at
had definite religious implications … pride, a loss of awareness on the need to trust foreign influences including the problem of the royal harem and emphasizing that the
Yahweh, and so unfaithfulness and apostasy. references to polygamy here was indeed a problem of foreign affairs unique to the
The prohibition was not aimed at the ownership of horses or even Israel’s use of king. When Israel sets up “like all the nations around” (V.14) he shall be a country
horses; rather it forbade costly and formidable preparation for war in the form of an man, not foreigner (V.15). The prohibitions of verses 16 and 17 then follow.
excessive “cavalry”. The king, moreover, must not acquire great number of horses for
11
The Levirate Law The disgrace heaped upon the unwilling Levir was not as severe a punishment as the
The Mosaic Law is found in total in Deuteronomy 25:5-10. A widow without a child death inflicted upon Onan in Genesis 38. Onan’s sin of repeated misuse of Tamar
was to marry a brother of her dead husband, and the first born son of his new marriage was possibly viewed by God as much more grievous than an outright rejection of the
was counted to be the son of the dead brother. Whether or not more than the first born obligation. Similar to Genesis 38 further legal regulation from a base of a common
son could be attributed to the dead brother is not known. The stated purpose of this custom appears to expand the pressure on the Levir from a more limited family matter
Levirate Law was raising up of the seed for the dead brother (Deut.25:6,9) as also to the additional and more intensified pressure of the community in a public ceremony.
seen in Genesis 38. The Judges
The two accounts must appear to differ in the identity of the obligators though since Gideon had “many wives” who bore him seventy sons; he also had a concubine
Deuteronomy only specifies the “brother-in- law” as under obligation and Genesis (Judges 8:30-31). It appears that it was customary for the judges to have several wives
depicts a wider family responsibility. While Genesis depicts a pre-mosaic custom, it as seen by the number of their offspring; Jair had thirty sons (Judges 10:4), Ibzan had
will be seen that Ruth depicts the wider family responsibility at a time when the thirty sons and thirty daughters (Judges 12:9). The concubine in Judges 19 who was
mosaic code was already established. In order to reconcile the Biblical accounts divided into twelve pieces was owned by a Levirate.
concerning the obligatory, one possibility would be to view the brothers in Ruth and the Levirate
Deuteronomy 25.as descriptive rather than as legally limited. The events in the book of Ruth transpired during the period of the Judges (Ruth1:1)
The law is then legislating how the responsibility towards the deceased and the and centre a round a theme of Levirate marriage. As a kinsman of Naomi’s dead
deceased’s widow customarily operated. husband (Ruth 2:1), Boaz is portrayed as being in the line for the Levirate
Normally, the brother of the deceased being the nearest next of kin and the best suited responsibility with Naomi’s recognition of him as “one of the redeemers” (Ruth2:20).
to act for the deceased will be called upon to raise up seed for the deceased. However, Neither Boaz nor the unnamed closer relative (Ruth3:12) were brothers-in-law (See
it should not be understood as if the Levirate was performed only under the conditions Ruth 1:11-13) but an order of the Levirate responsibility existed according to degrees
and through the specific parties mentioned in the Deutoronomic law. of blood relationship (Ruth3:12-13, 4:1).
Another possibility is to view in a wider sense as the near next of kinsman or member Naomi’s intent to seek” rest” for Ruth referred to her plan to seek out Boaz as Ruth’s
of the clan rather than the blood brother of the same parents. The narrow view of the Levirate (Ruth3:1). The fact that marriage was in his view is indicated by Ruth’s
Levirate brother would see a modification of ancient custom and the limitation to the action in uncovering the feet of Boaz and the request that he spread his covering over
Levirate institution for its inclusion into the Mosaic Code. The later view would her as a redeemer (Ruth3:9). Ruth’s express request was for marriage and it was to
conflict the Levirate marriage between Ruth and Boaz without legal justification. this request that Boaz was responding. The matter of the redemption of the land was
The Mosaic Code set fort the ceremony of the removal of the scandal whereby the not even introduced until Ruth 4:3, when Boaz tied the redemption of the land to the
kinsman was released from the Levirate obligation. Levirate marriage with Ruth. Apparently the revival of the deceased’s name as
There appears to have been some connection and common meaning between the specified in Deuteronomy 25:5-10 came to be regarded as a revival in both “person
divorce formula the husband said, “She was my slipper and I have cast her off”. and property” (See Ruth 4:10) although this seemingly went beyond what was
In the Mosaic Code the women removed the sandal thereby symbolizing both that she prescribed in the written law.
was free and that she had freed herself. This ceremony then constitutes a kind of Some writers indicate that Boaz and the other relative had the right of redemption but
release similar to divorce. that neither had a legal responsibility to redeem. This may be true if the responsibility
It is apparent by the shame heaped upon the ***Levir that*** was designed not to to redeem diminished with the degree of removal of the blood relationship. This
provide the Levir an escape from duty, but to apply severe pressure on him to perform distinction would also explain why the legal ceremony conducted in Ruth 4:1 did not
his duty. follow the procedure but appears to have been a legal, witnessed transfer of rights.
The woman took the initiative in calling an official and public meeting to make a A significant item in the book of Ruth is its confirmation of the view of
formal charge against the Levir. She then took the initiative in releasing herself, Deuteronomy 25 where by the Levirate obligation spread out beyond the brother-in-
thereby usurping what was usually the man’s privilege so that she could either return law to the lesser relatives. Whatever view one takes regarding the identity of the
to her own family or make her own way. obligatory as stated in the Levirate law, Ruth shows that intend and the spirit of that
She took the degrading action of spiting in the man’s face and his name was to bear a law called for an extended family responsibility for the childless widow.
continual stigma. Contrary to the idea that Biblical law functioned to hinder and limit The laws Deuteronomy does not indeed declare it as invalid in accordance with its
Levirate practise, Biblical law served to enforce and encourage its practise. spirit, but it puts it that in the case the obligation passes over the nearest relative of the
deceased. It is true, the letter of the law did not command this but, as the narrative of
12
our book shows, the spirit of that usage which the law sanctioned, required it. Ruth Rivalry between the women was again due to the issue of fertility, but in case it was
then illustrated an extended obligation as seen in Deuteronomy or clarified that the the one with child who provoked the strife rather than the barren one.
intent of the law included the extended obligation. This serves as a solid confirmation Hannah bore Samuel in answer to the prayer and promised of dedicating him to the
that the intent of the Deuteronomy Levirate law was not to limit or further confine Lord’s service. Samuel served under Eli the priest who blessed Elkana and Hannah.
Levirate marriage but rather to encourage its practise. She bore more children apparently in response to Eli’s blessing (1 Sam. 2:20-21).
In Genesis, Judah’s deception is condemned and Tamar’s striving for Levirate Samuel is later confirmed as a prophet and performs an important role in the
concept is praised in Deuteronomy, the uncooperative Levir’s brother, and the Lord’s implementation of the kingdom. Other than the familiar problem of the domestic strife
blessing is invoked upon him. Ruth 4:9 demonstrates graphically the blessing of the there is nothing negative in regards to the polygamy in these chapters. On the contrary
Lord, and thus the divine sanction for Boaz’s Levirate marriage. there are indications of the Lord’s involvement and blessing in the birth and service of
Another item of significance in the book of Ruth was the dual role of Boaz as the Samuel.
goal and the Levil in redeemed both the family property (Lev.25:25) and the
childless widow (Deut. 25:5-10) The redeeming kin’s man foreshadowed the great The United Kingdom
redeemer Christ. Moreover, the laws governing the Levirate and goal institutions 1Chronicles contains miscellaneous references to polygamy in the genealogies of the
as the very means which Jesus Christ, the son of David, is eventually born into Israelites; Jerahmeel, Ashhur and Ezrah had two wives (1Chronicles 2:26, 4:5, 17, and
the world? We may therefore say that, in an ultimate sense, the Levirate and goal 18); Caleb had two concubines (1Chronicle 2:46-48); Shimei had twenty two children
institution found their purpose in Christ and His kingdom. (1Chronicles 4:27) and thus probably more than one wife; and Shaharaim had three
The book of Ruth also introduced the element of land inheritance and widow care as wives (1Chron.8:8-11). The men of tribe of Issachar had “many wives and sons”
secondary functions of the Levirate law. While the matter of the land inheritance can (1Chron.7:4).
be ascribed to the function of the goal and Boaz’s dual role, one can see that rising up Saul
the son on his deceased father’s land is certainly consistent with the spirit of the The king of Israel established a definite pattern of polygamous marriages beginning
Levirate law. Although not certain, there are some indications in Ruth that the with the first King. Saul had a wife named Ahinoam (1 Sam.14:50) and harem of
Levirate marriages may have been of the polygamous nature since the closer relative other wives (2 Sam. 12:8). A concubine of Saul is mentioned by name; Elizpah (2
would not fulfil the Levirate duty for fear on jeopardising his own inheritance Sam. 3:7) who bore him two sons (2 Sam. 21:8-11).
(Ruth4:6), it’s best argued that he was already married. The relative would have David
purchased the land, but the new son from the Levirate marriage would have inherited it David originally married Michal, Saul’s daughter (1 Sam.18:27), but Saul later gave
rather than his own son. her to another man (1 Sam.25:44), presumably after David fled from the King.
Boaz’s marriage to Ruth may also have been polygamous due to several David began accumulating wives before he was king. While in the wilderness he
considerations. married Abigail the widow of Nabal, in addition to Ahinoam (1 Sam.25:39-43,
Generally, most Levarite marriages were polygamous, but specifically Boaz’s social 27:3), not to be confused with Saul’s wife of the same name.
position made it unlikely that he was not already married when he took Ruth. After Saul’s death before David’s forces had consolidated the kingdom, David also
Boaz was a man of substance (Ruth 2:1) in the sense of an “upstanding land owner” married and had sons by four additional wives; Maacah, Haggit, Abital and Eglah (2
who could be counted on to meet economic and social obligations. Both his wealth Sam. 31-5).
and apparent authority in the community simply meant that he was not a young man. He demanded that his wife Michal be returned and she was sent to him (2 Sam. 3:12-
He had servants and workers at his disposal, including maid servants Ruth 2:8, 13, 22- 16). When he gained control over the kingdom, “he took more concubines and wives
23, 3:2. from Jerusalem. After he came from Hebron (2 Sam. 5:13; 1Chronicles 14:13, see
In addition the marriage blessing of Ruth 4:11-12 cites famous ancestors as models also 2 Sam. 15:16, 19:5). David also took Bathsheba (2 Sam. 11:27) in a blatant case
including a case of polygamy and one of the Levirate whether or not the marriage of adultery which was severely condemned and which had damaging consequences for
between Ruth was polygamous. Whether approval and blessing are bestowed upon David’s reign.ref:2sam12:1-9
Boaz’s marriage should be seen in the context of the basically polygamous institution Reference to David’s offspring by various wives and concubines is found in 1
whether or not these individual marriages were polygamous. Chronicles 3:1-9, 14:3-7 and 2 Samuel 5:13-16, making a total of eight wives named.
ELKANAH He had at least ten concubines besides since ten were left behind when he fled
Elkanah had two wives; Hannah and Pennine (1Sam. 1-3). Peninnah was called the Jerusalem (2Sam. 15:16). God loved Bathsheba’s son Solomon from whom Jesus
“rival” (1Sam. 1:6) for she provoked Hannah because of Hannah’s barrenness. came.
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In gaining succession to the throne, David also inherited Saul’s harem (wives and obvious and a Jewish saying arouse that the Song should not be studied until thirty
concubines) (2 Sam. 12:80) Authority over the harem represented control over he years of age.
kingdom so the new king would acquire the wives and concubines of his predecessor It appears then that the Jews did not insist that the sexual imagery of the text
as a symbol of power. Thus when Ishboshet, Saul’s surviving son and heir to the eliminated the overall spiritual analogy of the bride and bridegroom.
throne, accused Abner of going into Saul’s concubine, he was accusing him of an Due to the many details in the Song of Solomon, however, and especially in regards
attempt to usurp the throne (2 Sam. 3:7-10). When Absalom revolted and tried to to the sexual content, any typical imagery of God and His people must at least remain
usurp the throne, he had relation with the ten concubines whom David left behind (2 very broad. The fact that Yahweh’s marriage is found in prophetic literature and not
Sam. 15:16, 16:21-22, 20:3). God’s action in giving David Saul’s wives is regarded as wisdom.
a “blessing”. I would have added to you many more things like these (2 Sam. 12:8b) The literal view would see within the realm of marriage and sexuality a prime area
and likewise God threatened the removal of his wives as judgement (2 Sam. 12:11 ref: for divine activity.
1 Sam. 25:39-43). Thus, the Song of Solomon probably was used for its evident value, as a means for
David took Abigail as wife after Nabal’s death. And he also took Ahinoam as wife the joyful celebration of sexuality and marriage; and this corresponds to the attitude
ref: 1 Sam. 25:39-43. NB: But God said, “David son of Jesse” is a man after my own toward the creation of male and state in Genesis 1:27.
heart, for he will obey me. And it is one of King David’s descendants, Jesus who is The song is wisdom’s reflection on the joyful and mysterious nature of love between
God’s promised saviour of Israel (Acts13:22-23). a man and a woman within the institution of marriage. The writer simply assumes the
Solomon Hebrew order of the family as a part of the given order of his society, and seeks to
Shortly after David’s death Adonijah asked Solomon for Abishag, David’s explore and unravel its mysteries from within.
concubine (1Kings 2:13-25). Solomon’s angry response “ask for him also the The literal view however, also requires an interpretation set within the history and
kingdom (1Kings 2:22), indicated the treasonous nature of the request and Adonijah culture in which the song was written, and this methodology needs to inquire as to the
was put to death. nature of the marriage portrayed in the book especially in light of statements that
Solomon had seven hundred wives and three hundred concubines (1Kings 11:3) monogamous marriage is portrayed. In a most general view, Solomon and harem of
which included Pharaoh’s daughter (1Kings 7:8, 9:16; 2 Chron. 8:11). A number of one thousand women (1 Kings 11:3) since only the first of one thousand marriages
these wives were no doubt due to the practise of sealing political alliances by could be monogamous; it is improbable that the marriage in this song depicts his first
marriage. Solomon’s harem of so many wives was clearly condemned in 1Kings 11:1 marriage.
and Nehemiah 13:26 due to its foreign composition. God had warned that foreign Those that see a monogamous marriage at least have the burden of proof to show that
wives would turn the king to other gods (Deut. 17:17). If ever there was clear case of the Shullammite was historically Solomon’s first wife.
violating the prohibition against multiplying wives, Solomon’s case was it. A second consideration is the fact that Solomon was already king when the events
Later in life, Solomon indicated the emptiness of his infatuation with many women recounted in the book took place, as is literally manifested by the book itself(Song
(Eccl. 12:8, 7:28) 1:4,12, 3:6,11, 7:5, 8:11,12 ). After David’s death Solomon possessed the wives and
Songs of Solomon concubines which he inherited from his father in accordance with the custom of the
The Song of Solomon depicts an intense love relationship between a man and a wife as day and as indicated by the matter of Abishag (1Kings 2:13,25) but since the co-
they reflect on past events related to their marriage. The bride is a Shullamite (Song regency with his father (1Kings 11:42, 14:21) did allow Solomon the title of king for
6:13), country girl with a dark complexion from being in the sun and keeping a an unspecified period without necessarily possessing the harem, it can be suggested
vineyard (Song 1:4,13, 3:6-11, 7:5, 8:11-12). that the event in the Song of Songs was Solomon’s first marriage.
Traditionally much has been made on the bride and bridegroom as symbols of the In analysing this suggestion, it is noted that Solomon’s reign was forty years (1Kings
union between God and His people. 11:42) he was succeeded by his son Rehoboam at forty-one years of age (1Kings
The Old Testament contains abundant examples of the nation as the bride of Yahweh 11:42, 14:31, 2 Chron. 12:13) Solomon, therefore, must have been married to Naamah,
(Hosea 2:18, 21; Isa. 54:5, 62:4-5; Jer. 2:2, 3:1, 4:30, 13:22,26, 30:14; Ezek. 16:8). the Ammonites, a couple of years before his reign began.
The Church has usually seen the marriage as typically representative of the mystery To allow for a monogamous marriage in the Song of Songs, one has to allow for a co-
of the love of Christ and His Church. A general recognition of types has also prepared regency long enough to include the events of the courtship and marriage to the
the way for a tradition of allegorical interpretation. Shullammite as well as the minimal two years of marriage to Naamah - a minimum of
Most sources fail to give a proper place to the literal interpretation of the book as about three years.
concerned with Biblical doctrine of sex and marital love. The sexual content is
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While a few suggest that the co-regency was as much as two or three years this view This includes literal interpreters, who currently hold that the 140 women are also
is greatly weakened by the indication of David’s condition which motivated Solomon’s wives “the song expresses the joy of sexual fulfilment between a husband
implementation of the co-regency (1Kings 1:14). It probably was not more than a few and wife in a monogamous marriage, “the portrayal of Solomon joyous marriage does
months; however, in view of David’s physical deficiency already Solomon was express the joy found in a monogamous marriage but by way of application rather than
crowned. interpretation. The expression of monogamous joy must be drawn by way of principle
Another weakness of the three year co-regency and the monogamous view is thematic. from the primary and literal interpretation, which is the portrayal of a particular joyous
Even a three year period would require that Solomon’s marriage become polygamous polygamous marriage.
within a year or less of marriage to the Shullammite. For a love undertook within the The distinction here is between the literal interpretation of the passage set in its
context of pure monogamy this would have been of short duration in Solomon’s historical and cultural context and the application, principle, or more generalised
experience. While the exact length of co-regency cannot be proven, due to the above teaching built upon that interpretation. Since it is a polygamous marriage the sexual
considerations a short co-regency is the stronger view and thus the view of a fulfilment portrayed in the song relates to that polygamous marriage by primary
monogamous marriage is weakened from a chronological standpoint. interpretation and then by principle or application to other polygamous and
 The song itself (Song 6:8-9) references sixty queens and eighty concubines. monogamous marriages. The primary error committed by literal interpreters is to
There are sixty queens and eighty concubines, agree that the actual marriage is historically polygamous, herald the monogamous
 And maidens without number; application, but then never acknowledge that his song actually communicates the joy
 She is her mother’s only daughter; of marriage in a polygamous setting. Those that see an already existing marriage of
 She is the pure child of the one who bore her. Solomon whether in form of an inherited harem, the harem of songs 6:8-10, or the
 The maidens saw her and called her blessed, marriage to Naamah must agree that a literal hermeneutic results in portrayal of a
 The queens and the concubines also, and they praised her. polygamous marriage in the song.
 This is evidently a description of a harem, and it can only be Solomon’s own. Solomon certainly could have chosen to elevate the virtues of monogamy over
It is remarkable that the old testament only once uses the word “queen” the feminine polygamy or to have discredited polygamy, but the song does neither. The argument
of Melek, “king”, connection with Israel, and that it is a poetical passage and in the for premarital purity as viewed from the perspective of the bride (song 2, 7, 3:5, 8:4)
plural, to describe the “queens” of the “king” in the Song of Songs, as distinct from his only argues for purity before marriage (and that of the bride) rather than monogamy
concubines. Elsewhere the singular is used of foreign queens… opposed to polygamy.The emphasis upon the bride’s sexual purity contrast with
It is neither feasible nor complimentary for Solomon to reference his bride against silence on the subject with regard to Solomon conforms to the polygamous
foreign [and thus pagan] queens belonging to other kings. relationship where in the husband was already married. Similarly, the praise and
excellence of Shullamith beauty over the queens and concubines (song 6:8-10) does
The indication is also that the women are local as they see and praise the bride(Song not portray monogamous marriage but an honoured position among the other wives in
6:91). The seemingly rare suggestion that the queens and concubines are girls from a polygamous marriage. The arrangement where one wife assumes priority over the
palace court which Solomon did not marry or aristocratic ladies and dazzling other wives is not at all unusual.
mistresses belonging to the noblemen of the court. Among the ladies of the harem, one held the king preference. This was evidently the
While the seemingly low number of wives and concubines appears to contrast with privilege of Bathsheba under David, of Ezabel under Achab, of Athaliah under Joram,
the one of thousand of 1 Kings 11:3, sources commonly suggest that the marriage with and it is explicitly stated of Maakah that Roboam loved her more than all his other
the Shullammite took place relatively early in Solomon’s reign. A few suggest that the wives and concubines (2Chron. 11:20).
phrase “without number” be taken for an indefinite and large number and thus the The marriage is portrayed in a very positive light, so much so that some claim that is
women in the harem could approach the large number previously cited but Solomon a protest against polygamy: “….(she) drew him away from the wantonness of
would be veiling it under a vague phrase. Or the sixty and eighty could refer to polygamous, and made for him the primitive idea of marriage, as it is described in
favourites. The maidens could be maids of the court and attendants of the harem Gen. 3:23; a self-experienced reality.
whom the king, if he had chosen, could have made to be concubines. Whichever of Also it would be a poem emphasizing the beauty of ideal love written by one who had
the above approaches is taken though results in a harem of a minimum of 140? The experienced the opposite. He would write from experience that polygamy is not
claim is frequently made by commentators that Solomon’s marriage portrays the virtue fulfilling as the way to find a maximum marriage.
of monogamy.

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As already stated, however, the fulfilment portrayed is that of a marriage within a Yahweh is portrayed in Jeremiah 3:6 although the imagery is developed, more fully in
polygamous context. Adding one more wife to a harem, even if she is the favourite the Ezekiel account. A similar correspondence exists with the three sisters (Samaria,
and most beautiful, hardly protest polygamy in favour of monogamy. Sodom, and Jerusalem) in Ezekiel 16:44.
When this marriage is applied to the polygamist thesis it is important to note that the The representation of Yahweh marriage as polygamous is basically and adoption in
Song of Solomon portrays not just a joyous marriage from a human view point, but the common monogamous analogy to the division of kingdoms, which existed at the
also a divinely accepted and encouraged marriage. time. It is easy to see how Samaria and Sodom loathed their husband and their
Unless one holds that the song in its entirety is a satire so that the statement of love, children; the husband was Yahweh (Hon. 2:16) whom they had rejected by their proud
blessing and encouragement are in reality the opposite in sentiment, then the divine and idolatrous ways. And the children were those whom they had sacrificed at
acceptance of this marriage relationship is apparent to virtually all observers. The heathen altars. It is less easy to see the logic of the Hittite mother loathing her
specificity with which God Himself condones and encourages the sexual relationship husband, unless we understand it also as a reference Yahweh, whom even the heathen
within Solomon’s marriages is especially noted by literal interpreters. were expected to serve……
The Song of Solomon then reveals a clear and important instance of a divinely Perhaps we must not press the details too closely when Ezekiel is saying no more
accepted and encouraged polygamous marriage, which, even alone, establishes the than that there was a family tendency to rejection of the Lord and his standards by
polygamist thesis. virtue of their mixed canaanitish ancestry.
The Divided Kingdom While a few pro-polygamist writers see significance in the fact that God is portrayed
Indications are that the kings of the divided kingdom habitually had multiple wives, here with multiple wives, the point should not be pressed due to the nature of
confirming the customary nature of the harem. Rehobaoam (2Chronicles 11:18-23) analogies. The portrayal of spiritual relationships through an allegory or an analogy is
had eighteen wives and sixty concubines. His sons where provided with “many not a given basis for establishing conduct on the physical or sexual relationship. The
wives” (2Chron. 11:23). Abidjah had fourteen wives (2Chron. 13:21) and Jehoram historical circumstances in these cases made polygamy the better analogy for
had wives (2Chron. 21:14, 17) communication rather than monogamy.Also refer 2sam 12:1-9 David is refeered as a
The conduct of Joash is commended and immediately followed by a citation of his rich man with many wives when Uriah is refeered as a poor man with only one wife.
wives “and Joash did what was right in the sight of the Lord all the days of Jehoida the
priest. And Jehoida took two wives for him, and he became the father of sons and NEW TESTMAENT
daughters” (2Chron.24:2, 3). The proximity of these two comments implies that the
taking of wives in this case was part of the commended conduct and probably relates John The Baptist And Herod Antipas.
to the Deuteronomy 17 limitation on excess wives. This editorial comment concerning In the confrontation between John the Baptist and Herod Antipas concerning
Joash is an exception among the citations of harems in the divided kingdom, the other Antipas marriage, there is no direct reference to polygamy (Matt. 14:1-12; Mark 6:14-
references being simple historical references. 29, Luke 3:19-20). However, this is known to be the case historically.John reproved
Manasseh had a concubine (1Chron. 7:14) but there is no mention of a wife. Antipas generally for “all the wicked things which he had done” (Luke 3:19 only).
Other kings with multiple wives include Josiah (2 Kings 23:31, 34, 36) Ahah (1 Kings And specifically concerning his marriage to Herodias, the wife of his half-brother
20:3-7, 2 Kings 10:1) Jeoiachin (2 Kings 24:15) and Zedekiah 9, Jer. 38:23 Philip. While a guest in Philip’s house, Antipas proposed marriage to Philip’s and she
Sennacherib also claimed in his Annals that he accepted the women of Hezekiahs consented. The two eloped together although both were married at the time.
harem as tribute.There are additional historical Biblical notes on the harems of foreign Nothing was said concerning Antipas general polygamous circumstance although he
kings. Belshazzar had wives and concubines (Dan. 5:21) Ahasuerus had concubines had ten wives in all. Rather, John charged him concerning the Leviticus prohibition
(Esther 2:3, 9, 13, 14) and a queen wife (Esther 1) who was elevated from among the against taking a brothers wife while he Is alive; “it is not lawful for you to have your
wives. brothers wife” (mark 6:18,cf . matt. 14:4) whichever view one takes of Leviticus 18:16
and 20-21 Antipas’ actions were a violation because levirate marriage was not in view,
Allegory of two sisters. Philip was still living, and the arrangements whereby Antipas acquired Herodias were
In the prophetic literature, Ezekiel 23:1 Jer 3:6-8 (Israelite and Judah). Contains an adulterous.
allegory depicting Yahweh as the polygamous husband of two sisters who represent John’s strong rebuke for the Levitical violation emphasises that while this account was
the northern and southern Kingdoms. The wives insist on being unfaithful to their part of the New Testament record, the dispensation of the Mosaic Law was still in
husband and correspond to the spiritual adultery of idolatry, which was committed by effect. Herodias was Jewess and belonged to the royal family; Herod Antipas was the
Israel and then Judah. The same imagery of the two sisters being unfaithful to ruler of the Jews, and yet they put the Jewish law up to contempt. The Levitical
16
prohibitions were still in the force and it was within the sphere of these regulations that item in question was controversial or morally important .in review of Israel’s history ,
John was operating. The fact that Antipas was a polygamist and yet there is no record beginning with the time of the judges.
of a condemnation of that aspect by John simply conveys the Old Testament No pattern emerges as to a correspondence between polygamy and character, whether
distinction that polygamy was not identified as adultery. godly or ungodly, of the leader. The evident comment concerning the Kings hinders
an abuse of the harem in reference to numbers but particularly in regard to quantity.
Levirate marriage and the Sadducees: Deuteronomy 17 hinders an excessive accumulation of wives, particularly
The Sadducees challenged Jesus with a complicated situation of levirate marriage addressing the foreign element that is introduced through the practice of sealing
where in the wife of the first brother was subsequently inherited, by the six succeeding treaties by marriage.
brothers, all of whom died and left no heir. The account (Matt. 22;23-3; mark 12;18- Solomon’s foreign wives illustrate the danger as they cause him to fall into pagan
27; Luke 20:27-40) does not mention multiple wives but relates to polygamy and cases religion (1 kings 11:11; Nehe. 13: 26).
of levirate marriage were usually polygamous. Other references concerning the harem indicate a practice authorised by God for
First of all, it is apparent that this levirate story was a contrived theoretical situation certain individuals. In regard to David’s acquisition of Saul’s wives, it is stated: “it is I
designed to challenge Jesus about the resurrection. The legality of the institution of who anointed you king over Israel and it is I who delivered you from the Hand of Saul.
levirate marriage was not an issue for the Sadducees at least accepted the law of I also gave you your master’s house wives into your bosom, and I gave you the house
Moses. Nor was the intent to raise a question about the polygamous aspect of the of Israel and Judah: and if that have been too little, I would have added to you many
Levite institution. Only one wife was viewed probably because only one was needed more things like these” (2 Sam. 12:7-8) God says.
to develop the dilemma and two would have been detrimental to it. Introducing more While acquisition of the preceding kings’ harem was an important public sign of
than one wife, even in the form of a previous marriage of one of the younger brothers, succession and an inseparable cultural phenomenon of rulership, the point to be noted
would introduce a new set of problem –not resurrection problems but contemporary of here is God’s operation and authorisation within the sphere of this cultural practice.
widow inheritance: Similarly in reference to the conduct of Joash it is stated:
The practice of levirate marriage entailed some very complicated problems, And what Joash did was right in the sight of the Lord all the days of Jehoida the priest.
particularly in cases of marriage within the family, and the tractate Yebamoth includes And Jeohida took two wives for him. And he became the father of sons’ and
many law and historical traditions dealing with the difficulty problems, which arose in daughters (2 chron 24:2-3).
connection with the practice. Many controversies, some very early, developed The implied commendation of Joahs’s marriage can probably be attributed to the fat
regarding the actual application of the levirate. One of the arguments, for example, that he limited his wives in accord with Deuteronomy 17, but an implication of correct
dealt with the proper procedure in case the deceased brother had been married to two conduct still exist in reference to a plurality of wives.
wives. A third reference to aharem marriage as a theorised by God is a most important one
This account also clearly addressed the subject of the resurrection. The Sadducees Solomon’s marriage to the shulammite in the Song of Songs. Chronologically the
are introduced with the fact that they “say there is no resurrection”. marriage has difficulty being other than polygamous without seeing lengthy co-
They end their case with the specific question of the resurrection and Jesus answered regency for Solomon and David. And even then the change from monogamy to
concerning the state of the married in the resurrection. One therefore should not expect polygamy would have occurred upon the heels of supposedly much –touted and
and does not receive any comment on the propriety of levirate marriage from this important monogamous theme. Internally though the book reveals a harem of sixty
interaction: Jesus responded to the Sadducee’s carefully worded question as it was queens and eight concubines (song 6:8- 9) that can be none other than Solomon’s.
asked. One might wish that Jesus would have given some additional insight into the The relationship portrayed is a marriage and contains various obvious sexual
institution to levirate marriage, particularly since the new covenant was about to be references. Most importantly in regard to this inquiry, the marriage and sexual
inaugurated, but one has only the Old Testament upon which to base an opinion. prelateship portray a divinely accepted and encouraged marriage. Since Solomon’s
marriage here is polygamous the polygamist thesis finds a clear instance of divinely
Conclusion accepted polygamous marriage to support its contention. But even more than this the
As expected in citations on the institution of polygamy, many cases were historical Song of Songs is not a passing reference but the most length comment on marriage in
occurrences without obvious comments as to the propriety of polygamy .citation of the the whole of scripture.
harem of the leaders were numerically the most abundant .although mere existence and This instance of polygamous marriage and the extensive and obvious dine
citation in scripture does not reflect a positive or negative comment ,the more citation encouragement of the marriage exhibited in Song of Songs therefore requires a major
that occur the more one would expect that accompanying comment would exist if the adjustment in the” Monogamy only” contention.
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The above reference concerning the harem indicate a practice authorised by God identity of the two wives, and the taking of his third wife from among relatives was an
in reference to certain individuals (David, Solomon, Joash) modified only by warning attempt to appease his parents (Gne.28:8-9).
to avoid excess and the accompanying foreign influence. The other polygamous characters into whose lives we have been given some insight
Given Solomon’s particular and most explicit marriage, the marriages for David and do, however, reflect a definite pattern with regards to domestic conditions. Abraham,
Joash should also be considered as legitimate polygamous marriages. In turn, other Jacob, and Elkahah all had considerable domestic strife in their homes and the
historical citations of harems as a whole are best taken at face value as being instances contention between the women was basically caused by problems of infertility.
of legitimate marriages unless some reason or unusual circumstances exist so as to Sarah was despised in the sight of Hagar once Hagar had conceived, and trouble
question individual instances. At least it would be difficult to distinguish why one or ensued between them (Gene. 16:4). Trouble surfaced again due to Ishmael’s
more harem marriages would be valid while the bulk, cited historically, would not be. disrespectful conduct at the weaning of Isaac Gen 21:9) Jacob’s wife Rachel finally
A second form of the institution of polygamy found in the scriptures is that of the conceived, both women used heir handmaiden to supplement their fertility
levirate marriage. Levitate marriage is recognise as a mandated form of polygamy incompletion against one another Compounding the problem was Jacob’s great love of
which did not exists a part from the existence and practice of polygamy. While the Rachel in contrast to Leah (Gen 25: 18-20,30-34) Elkanah also had trouble as
individual biblical case may or may not have been polygamous, the levirate custom Peninnah provoked Hannah because Hannah was barren (1Sm.1:6).
and law functioned with the result of producing mandated polygamy. The biblical Also recorded in Elkana’s love for Hannah and a double portion of the sacrifice for
cases of levirate were surveyed to ascertain God’s attitude and actions with regard to her (1 Sam 1-5 ) but this may stem from her problem of barrenness. The law also
levirate marriage and these were seen as reflective of his attitude toward the mandated recognised these problems of rivalry and favouritism in that it protected the inheritance
polygamy produced by the levirate law and custom. of the first-born in the case of two wives, one loved and one unloved (Deut. 21:15-17),
The three levirate instances in the Old Testament revealed God’s encouragement of and the term “rival” issued of multiple wives, (Levi 18:18), as it was used of Peninah
levirate marriage. In genesis 38, God struck dead the deceitful levir but the window (11 Sam 1:6).
was vindicated in her deceit to have the duty fulfilled. In Deuteronomy 25, the law The recurrence of rivalry in the domestic situation viewed, plus the recognition given
provided extreme pressure on the levir in the form of public shame so as to fulfil his the problem through incorporation of the idea into the law, points to an inherent and
duty. The intent was not to allow a provision of escape but to produce compliance. corporate problem for polygamy. That domestic dissension was characteristic of
The book of Ruth then clarified of the levirate duty as an obligation falling upon even polygamous marriages is obvious also to writers on the subject. Although all
lesser kins men, and as being an honourable and praise worth function. recognise the nature of the problem, it is the significance of the problem with respect
The polygamy that was produced by levirate marriage occurred under a set of to a conclusion on the validity of polygamy that needs clarification.
particular circumstances outside the control of the levir. Thus, more than the desire While the accounts of domestic strife function together as an apologetic against
and means to acquire wives was needed in contrast to the creation of harems by the polygamous, it is questionable that the legitimacy or morality of polygamy is being
kings and the general polygamy practised by the populace. addressed. The domestic accounts that illustrate strife caused by polygamy also show
But herein lies the strength of the levirate subject for the polygamist argument: the additional blessing because of polygamy.
ultimate and specific mandate for polygamous marriages created through levirate Abraham adds another wife despite the strife already experienced with Sarah and
marriage was from God, complete with praise for the obedient and unselfish Levir and Hagar, and he receives more offspring, Jacob receives the maidens of his wives despite
contempt for the one who would not consummate such a marriage. the strife already present, and his house is greatly increased. Elkanah’s house is torn
Besides the harem and levirate marriage, a third type of polygamy was viewed: due to two women but the Lord gives a great blessing with the birth of Samuel.
general polygamy or the polygamy practised by the populaces private individuals from In the domestic accounts of strife, the issue centres on fertility of the wives in each
various segments of society took additional wives for varied reasons. case. In a society which regards numerous progeny as the supreme good which man
Starting with the first citation Lamech, the man from whose sons social divisions were can achieve, barrenness must be considered as the greatest of calamities. In the
traced, polygamist variously included the (Abraham) hunter (Esau and sons), shepherd biblical instances, these men were willing to forego inherent domestic strife to receive
(Jacob,)Levite (Elkahah), and miscellaneous men whose positions are unknown (1 the blessings of offspring. The law recognises the inherent strife and tries to reduce
Chron. Genealogies). some damaging effects that may arise from it. Strife is not desirable, but the thematic
No moral significance was seen in the first citation of polygamy, rather the reference argument concerning it may point to something that certain men endured for the sake
served to identify and underscore the human origin of leech’s sons from whom social of a higher good –increased progeny.
development was traced. The polygamy of Esau was criticised due to the Canaanite The concept of polygamous levirate marriage also argues that domestic strife does not
invalidate polygamy or make it morally unfeasible.
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A Levirate marriage is formed for the very reason that domestic strife is shown to arise who is called while is free is Christ’s slave. You were bought at a price; do not
(Infertility) and yet the issue of progeny is substantial enough for God to mandate such become slaves of men.
marriages although they also should be inherently strife-ridden. Brethren let each one of you remain with God in that calling in which he was called.
Rather than teaching that strife should eliminate polygamy, the entire accounts more Acts 10:34-35 then Peter opened his mouth and said, “In truth I perceive that God
approximate the teaching that the advantage of numerous progeny outweigh the shows no partiality. But in every nation WHOEVER fears Him and works righteously
disadvantage of domestic strife. is accepted by Him and chosen as vessels (Acts 9:15).
At the same time though it is under emphasised that strife is a marked pragmatic Anyway let each one of you be convinced in his own mind whether these things
disadvantage of polygamy. are true. Rom. 14:1-10 receive one who is weak in the faith, but not to dispute over
The Theme of strife stands as a scriptural warning for polygamists on a very practical doubtful things.
issue so that whatever advantages or conditions are reconsidered for such a marriage, For one believes he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats only vegetables.
these should be weighed against the pragmatic costs. Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not
The conclusions from the investigations into the Biblical detail on polygamy are eat judge him who eats; for God has received him.
applied to the polygamous thesis: Who are you to judge another man’s servant?
“Polygamy, rather than being identified as a sinful conduct by the scriptures, is To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed he will be made to stand, for God is able
portrayed as a divinely accepted institution. to make him stand.
One person esteems one day above another, another everyday alike. Let each be
Point to note on: Bishops/Elders/Deacons. fully convinced in his own mind. He who observes the day, observes it to the Lord; he
who does not observe the day, to the Lord he does not observed it. He who eats to the
As for him who DESIRES (mark this word-desire; one who has a strong ambition) to Lord, for he gives God thanks; and he who does not eat, to the Lord he does not eat,
be in that office is advised to marry only one wife for the sake of easy administration and gives God thanks. For none of us lives to himself and no one dies for himself.
in his house and get enough time to serve God and other people in the Church. For if we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore,
whether we live or we die we are the Lord’s. For to the end Christ died and rose and
1 Tim 3:4-5 lived again, that he might be the Lord f both the dead and the living.
But why do you judge your brother? Or why do you show contempt for your
Ruling your house well then care for the church. Your wife should be submissive and brother? For we shall all stand before the judgement seat of Christ. So each of us
your children should be obedient. I wonder if this is observed. Now then where does shall give an account of himself to God. Therefore let us not judge one another
the Bible condemn polygamy for those who do not desire that office? Suppose one is anymore. Rom. 8:33 who shall bring a charge against God’s elect? It is God who
not married and is not even intending to marry; will not this make a pastor or a justifies. Ref. Matt. 7:1, James 4:11-12.
Bishop? What of the unmarried Lady? Won’t she serve God? Do not speak evil of one another, brethren. He, who speaks evil of abrother and
Read the Bible and get tot know before your judge, if you have to. / Compare with 1 judges his brother, speaks evil of the Law and judges the law.
Corinthians 7:6 “I am not saying that you must marry” Paul says. But remember that But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.
women serve in the house of the Lord and yet they are not subjected to such Who are you to judge another? There is one lawgiver, who is able to save and to
conditions. Remember that Paul at one point he refuses them to teach or preach 1 Tim destroy.
2:11-14; 1 Cor. 14:34 Judge now by yourself. 1Cor. 4:1-5 let a man so consider us, as servants of Christ and stewards of the
Also the case one called by God to serve is not under such advice for God might have mysteries of God. Moreover it is required in stewards that one is found faithful.
called him/her in different status. 1Cor. 7:17-24 live as you are called by God. But as But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by a human
God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. court. In fact, I do not even judge myself. For I know nothing against myself, yet I
And so I ordain in all churches. Was anyone called while uncircumcised? Let am not justified by this; but he who judges me is the lord. Therefore judge nothing
him not be circumcised.Circumcision is nothing, but keeping the commandments of before the time, until the Lord comes, who will both bring to light the hidden things of
God is what matters. darkness and reveal the counsels of the hearts; and then each one’s praise will come
Let each one remain in the calling in which he was called. Were you called while from God.
a slave? Do not be concerned about it; but if you can be made free, rather use it. For Do you have faith, have it to yourself before God? Happy is he who does not
he who is called in the Lord while a slave is the Lord’s freedman. Likewise he condemn himself for what he approves. (Rom 14:22).
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I Corint 8: 2 . And if anyone thinks that he knows anything, he knows nothing yet, as do what is right. It is God’s way of making us well prepared at every point, fully
he ought to know. equipped to do good to everyone {2 Tim. 3:16-17}
So then, many Church minister, pastors etc, and theologians have misled God’s
people by the so called monogamy {one man one woman} doctrine. Using 1Tim. 3:1-
COMMENT ON:- 7 to impose such a doctrine to people is deceiving them. I want us take a tour into this
Matthew 19:4-6 passage and carefully read between the lines. It starts; it is a true saying {this is a
faithful saying} if a man wants to be {desires} to be a pastor or bishop he has a good
A man should leave his father and mother to join his wife and the two will be one. ambition {he desires a good work}. Then he must be a husband of only one wife ….
This is to say, a woman is borne of a man, a part of a man’s flesh. Gen 2:18 and the together with those other qualities.
Lord God said, “It isn’t good for man to be alone; I will make a compassion for him, a Verse 5- for if a man can’t rule well or make his own little family behave, how can he
helper suited to his needs”. help the whole church?
Gen. 2:21-22 then the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep, and took One thing you must think of as number one is, who is this passage talking about? It
one of his ribs and closed up that place, made the woman and brought her to the man. is talking about a man who has an ambition, want or a desire to be a pastor or a bishop.
Gen 2:24 “this is it” Adam exclaimed, “She is part of my own bone and flesh her name Watch this; a desire is a strong wish to have, or do something; it is a strong feeling of
is woman because she was taken out of a man. Gen 2:24 explains why a man leaves wanting; an ambition. Normally God looks at our hearts. He knows the motives
his father and mother and is joined to his wife in such a way that the two become one {motivating factor or force} and intentions i.e. eager interest and attention of human
person. heart, for the Bible says that ht human heart is desperately wicked and deceitful. It is
NB: look here! No matter how many bones are added into one man, that same man only God who searches the heart.
remains one man. With this kind of desire, Paul thought it wise to bring this faithful saying because he
Refer Ephesians 5:31 that the husband and wife are one body is proved by the knew that many people may rush to do the work of God by as a business due to wrong
scripture which says, a man must leave his father and mother when he marries, so that desires.
he can be perfectly joined to his wife, and the two shall be one. Therefore he put in place speed limits, bumps, and warning signs on the road to serve
Ephesians 5:32 I know this is too hard to understand, but it is an illustration of the God as a pastor or bishop led by your desire. Is there anywhere you have come across
way we are parts of the body of Christ. on the conditions given to a man God has called and chosen to serve Him? If not,
Also Refer, 1corithians 6:16 and don’t you know that if a man joins himself to a why? It is because God looks at the heart and knows who can do what. Hence He
prostitute he becomes apart of her? For God tells us in the scripture that in his sight tells you to stay in your calling.
the two become one person. Which means that you and your wife or wives plus all the
prostitutes you will join yourself – you will be one. So if this is the man who is conditioned, why assume that it is every man included – up
For this course I wonder where in the Bible that Jesus commands or even suggests to and including laymen? Let the truth set you men free. Behold that even Paul was
that EVERY man must be married to only one wife as people claim. Where from is aware that polygamy is Biblical and exists which is why he conditions this man who
the doctrine of every man must have only one wife, if this is not forced monogamy? desires a pastor’s office to have only one wife. Paul has never quoted anywhere that
Jesus only answered a question concerning divorce, as it was asked. Jesus was much marrying many wives is a sin. Ask yourself that question, which conditions are given
aware that polygamy existed and not forgetting that his grandfather David was a to a woman preacher? Of course I know that there are some people who are bound by
polygamist and more so he acquired his grandmother Bathsheba in a blatant case of religion until now who will argue that a woman is not supposed to preach. If you are
adultery {2 Sam. 11:27} in addition to the many other wives he had and even those he one, woe unto you. Search the scriptures and see women of God who did good work
inherited from Saul’s harem. Watch this; God loved Bathsheba’s son Solomon from and when God pours His spirit upon all what will happens to each person.
whom Jesus came. Therefore this faithful saying is to a desirous man is only meant to lay aside much
Why couldn’t God condemn such polygamous marriages? Isn’t God the creator of burden so that this man may have an easy or ample time to serve God by spending less
heaven and earth and all things therein? Is God of the Old Testament different from time in leadership of his little family.
that of the New Testament? I know and believe that God is the same yesterday, today
and forever. He changes not. And He is the God of the entire Bible. I believe that all WHAT THEN? MARRYING OR NOT MARRYING?
scripture in the Bible are given by inspiration from God and are to teach us what is Matt. 19:12 some are born without the ability to marry and some are disabled by men;
true and to make us realise what is wrong in our lives; it straightens us out and helps us and some refuse to marry for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.
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Let everyone who can, accept my statement. Verse 11 not everyone can accept this freedom. Mary only those that you can manage to care for properly and be sure to
statement, only those whom God helps. 1 Cor 7:32-38 treat all equally, be fair to all. Let the woman you have married or you are marrying
In all you do, I want you to be free from worry. An unmarried man can spend his time know that you are free to marry another wife when need be. Be open to her from day
doing ht lord’s work and thinking how to please Him. But a married man can’t do that one. Deut. 17:17 he must not have too many wives, lest his heart be turned away from
so well; he has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. the Lord. Lev. 18:18 you shall not marry two sisters. Deut. 21:15 if a man has two
His interest is divided. The same applies to a girl {lady} wives but loves one and not the other … (you see that God knows that at one point you
I am saying this to help you, not to keep you from marrying. I want you to do may be partial) watch this; Exo. 21:10 if you take another wife you shall not diminish
WHATEVER will help you serve the LORD BEST, with as few other things as the first wife’s food, clothing and her marriage rights. If you do that she will be free to
possible to distract your attention from Him {Lord}. leave you (divorce you).
But anyone who feels he ought to marry because he has trouble controlling his
passions, it is alright, it is not a sin; let him or her marry. But if a man or woman has
the willpower not so marry and decides that he or she doesn’t marry does even better. For example
Remember that God wants us to fill the earth, therefore for those who want to marry But if someone who is supposed to be a Christian has money enough to live well, and
one wife, it is okay. For those who do not want to marry it is still okay. And yet, for sees a brother in need, and won’t help him – how can God’s love be within? Little
those who have the willpower to marry many wives and children let them go ahead children, let us stop just saying we love people; let us REALLY LOVE them, and
and balance the equation of filling the earth. SHOW it by our actions. Then we will know for sure, by our actions, that we are on
Many people don’t want to speak on this topic for fear of being thought as unclean by God’s side, and our consciences will be clear, even when we stand before the Lord.
people. But should I fear men or God? I will not be ashamed of the Gospel. It is not But if we have bad consciences and feel that we have done wrong, the Lord will
my thought or word but of Him who sent me. I am just a chosen vessel. Just a servant surely feel it even more, for He knows, everything we do.
or call me a messenger to deliver the Good News to every creature. But dearly loved friends, if our consciences are clear, we can come to the Lord with
Many a time the truth is bitter. But when you know the truth, it will set you free PERFECT ASSURANCE and Trust, and get WHATEVER we ASK for because we
John 8:32. NB John 8:45 and so when I tell you the truth, why don’t you believe me? are obeying Him and doing the things that please Him.
John 1:5 and the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it. And this is what God says we must do; Believe on the Name of His Son Jesus Christ,
For sure God knows and is aware that men are few in this world for He is the creator, and love one another.
which is why He let polygamy be practised right from the time of Abraham till now Those who do what God says – They are living with God and him with them. We
and it shall be forever. By the way where do you want our sisters to go? Are you know this is True because the Holy Spirit He has given us TELLS US SO.
happy when you see them wasted and never married?
For those ladies who are too possessive and are envious to share a husband woe unto “Unlocking” the “gate” to a wife’s receptiveness
you for envy leads you to hell and mind you envy is equal to murder. You will never
see the Kingdom of God. All men upon learning of Christian Polygamy can successfully help their wives to be
Just step into that unmarried lady burning in passion, desiring to be married for many receptive to the very “meaty” concept of Christian polygamy, indeed this probably is
years, but no man to marry her. Does it hurt? For sure if it were you, saved and one of the single most vital understanding. It truly is one of the single most asked
committed in the Lord what could you do? NB: A man is naturally polgamous. question from men after they have just recently discovered the truth of Christian
Polygamy. When first confronted with their wife’s surely understandable initial
Case Study “hesitation”to Christian polygamy, with her presently keeping the “gate! To her
Refer Gen. 38:13-40 Tamar disguised herself and went with her father in law and got receptiveness “closed” or perhaps temporary “locked”, then many men responding to
her twin babies, because she was denied a chance to marry. You see these results to that by making the mistakes of simply trying to use the “wife submission” verses in
prostitution because of that desire and a burning passion. You see why we can’t the scriptures in order to try to “inform” their wife that she somehow must “accept” it
control immorality? Do you again need to ask why infidelity, immorality, prostitution regardless.
etc. Such topics are much assumed and little emphasis is put on family matters. At Of course, that only fails. And indeed, it actually ends up working against the
some point in this book you will learn why some men or women have some deals husband who tries that, as it makes the wife even more; understandably not receptive
outside marriage (sex matters). Men, now you know that it is no sin to marry many to hearing about Christian polygamy.
wives, you have all the freedom but, take care that you don’t misuse (abuse) this
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By his trying to “clobber her over the head” with the wife submission” verses, all he this way. These men are praying for help and their wives often times are hoping for a
actually ends up succeeding at is in making her want to even more “securely” “lock” gentle revelation from God.
the gates to her receptiveness. By his trying to use such a concept of force, he ends up Now the fact is, while a man who does not yet embrace Christian polygamy is highly
making it even more difficult to “unlock the gate”.But my mission is to provide likely to have tried to use the, “wife submission” verses to try to persuade his wife that
principles an insight into these very delicate and important issues. For any man to help she is supposed to embrace Christian polygamy. It could be seen as potentially correct
a wife to eventually embrace in the Letter of the Law” but it still fails to persuade a wife, almost every time, because
Christian polygamy, it is clearly important that he has a heart filled with selfless it is not come off as in the Spirit, in the “spirit of the Law”.
Christ-like love, showing it by action, and building up that trust in their relationship
between them. And with that, he can then learn and succeed at how to “unlock” the Why does it usually fail?
“gate“to her receptiveness indeed.
Truly, the issue of how to help wives with the issue of Christian polygamy is a vital Because it cannot get past the woman’s rational, legitimate and initial” that the only
imperative for all of us in Christian polygamy. This is of course, especially so for the reason her husband is thinking of polygamy is in himself, for his own interest’. (Mind
husbands among us. Men must be loving, and understand the hearts and minds of the you, when I use the word “suspicion”, I am not talking about all the days’ function
precious blessing of God that we know as women. (Praise the Lord for the blessing which is normally associated with that word. Rather, I am only referring to the
that women so truly are, in all their wondrous and unique ways!). concept of the questioning, wondering, preparing for investigation, hypothesising,
etc.)” And so, when her husband tries to use the “wife submission” verses, all he is
It is prayed that the insights from this book might be a blessing for all who read this, doing is actually further PROVING to her that her “SUSPICION” of polygamy being
as being a blessing for the growth of any marriages which might thereafter be all and only about the husband’s self interest” appears as correct to her, because even
positively affected. And therewith, may the Lord alone be glorified! Indeed, I would the “wife submission” verses come off as sounding as, “self interested” when a man
like to take this moment to clear up any potential confusion or misperception about tries to use them to self justify an action towards his wife when she is rationally
this ministry or about my own personal views on the subject of “wife submission” wondering about it.
doctrine in the scripture, and to explain why it is more important for us to more stay He ends up confirming her investigation as to whether this is just a self interest,
focused on teaching men to grow in their selfless, Christ like love for women. matter when he uses these “wife submission” verse against her.
Now, before I begin here, it is important to make it clear that even as I preach love So, the thing is it actually BACKFIRES on him when he tries to do this. There is a
and not force, and even as I explain all the “meaty” matter here, that does not mean time for effectively teaching those verses and a time when it fails., When a heated
that somehow I have given women some supposed “feministic power” over men at all. argument between husband and wife arises, if he ever resorts to the “wife submission”
I also clearly preach the Word of God as in such passages as 1Cor. 11;3, 8-9, 12; verses in his self Justification at such a time, he is making himself appear to be
1Tim. 2:10 but which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works exploiting Scripture to self justify himself at such time.
(KJV). He is making himself appear to be exploiting scripture to self-justify his own agenda
And yet, some have wondered why the focus is more on the man growing in Christ- against the contributing thoughts of the wife. She might rightly submit, but what he
like love but there is powerful spiritual reason for this. has taught her to think about him is that he will exploit scripture to Get his way” that
does not build Trust, but, instead plants a seed of distrust. But if instead, he will
It is about ministry refrain himself from resorting to that, especially in such times, but instead he goes to
Of course, this would not be suggesting that Godly women should be allowed into where she is “at” spiritually and emotionally, showing he cares about what she thinks
supposedly “sin” of stubbornness or being deviant, in order to minister to them or to and feels, she is more likely willing to JOYFULLY submit, and even be re-assured
protect them from others who would hurt them. that her husband will Not resort to clobbering her over the head” with those “wife
Rather, it is about ministry for women by helping husbands, who are able to better submission” verses in such a time.
understand, care and love their wives. And indeed I will even go so far as to testify (as I have in the past) that my own” first
Most women (but not all, of course) are already NOT hostile to Christian wife” does indeed set the example herself for others at the times referring to me as”!
polygamy. (And these particular wives most often have no need to be “taught” the Small –L” “lord “ ( 1 Peter 3:6).
wife submission verses any way, as they are already in happy marriages and But she does this precisely because I do not force her. That’s the point I am tying to
embracing Christian Polygamy some men might have a wife who does NOT believe share here. (Let that be understood by all who read this that it is wholly a Voluntary
matter here) If it helps, I would encourage people to think of it this way. The Lord
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has given our dear women a blessing that we tend to think of as a short” intuition”. He himself has “locked “ the gate” because she just knows that “ something is not
This intuition is often like a Gate of a fence which protects her inner minds ability to right”, and then he only further proves that “something is not right” to her by
accept something as valid, true and good. appearing to be even that much more self-interested by his then trying to clobber her
How many times have our women said the following a bout something? “There’s over the head” with the “wife submission “ verses.
something not right about that thing, even if I cannot put my finger on just what it is” The man has made a difficult situation even harder and more difficult! He has
Most of us have likely seen it often, for sure! What a blessing our women are for sure! sabotaged the situation, making it even “worse” than before.
AMEN This point is so important to understand that I will re-iterate it. If he has already
The “key” to unlocking that “Gate” is TRUST, which comes out of believability and gotten her distrusting him for his appearing as being only self interested,it is like
credibility.TRUST cannot be “expected “or “demanded”. It can only be earned by our insulting her with Christian polygamy. Then when he resorts to the “wife submission”
own deliberate actions. And our personal credibility decreases dramatically when we verses on her, he only ends up looking even much more that” all he is about” is his
appear to be overtly out for own” self-interest”, especially if it appaers to conflict with own” self interest”! It works against him even much more” locking “her” gate. And it
the interest of the other person. is not her fault, but his.
Again, TRUST is not likely built when one appears to be doing something for So while he might be scripturally correct, he is spiritually failing her.
someone else without having hidden agendas or self-interest, the more TRUST you And so, what becomes important is to have the wisdom of appropriate timing. Of
can build indeed. So, now, to a woman, when a husband brings Christian polygamy to course, the “Wife submission” verses are scriptural and right doctrine (As applied non-
her, what happens at the “gate”? tyrannically and not in chest-pounding mentally). And Christian polygamy is
She is reasonably, “suspicious” about it, because at first it naturally APPEARS that the Scripitutural and right doctrine (As applied with love and not as by the FORCE view).
issue is simply something which will “benefit” the man, appearing even to be against But it is to the natural husband’s growing maturity for him to understand (or learn)
her self and everything she’s been taught all her life. how to gently “unlock” his dear wife’s gate” so that she can receive such an awesome
So, naturally, the “Gate remains” locked”, and she is distrustful of it, with truth of the Lord with joy.
understandable reason. So now with this understood. We may also see why the TRUTH of love-not- force
It is wholly unjust to simply accuse a wife of mere “disobedience” for at least having is indeed able to so help a wife embrace Christian polygamy.
this understandable” suspicion”. After all, it does initially look like it’s only about For a woman, the Vision quickly helps remove the appearance that, the issue of
what a man gets especially given all the centuries of that stereotypical idea being Christian Polygamy is some how about the man’s own “self-interest” And it does Not
passed from one generation to the next. clobber the woman over the head” with the wife submission” verses, it preaches about
But rather than compassionately understand why this is reasonable” suspicion” for the the man saying to his wife how he needs to grow in Christ, rather than him pointing a
dear wife to have at first, what is the understandably common, yet dysfuncitonal finger at her telling her how she is simply supposed to “obey” him. This Vision says
method which many otherewise even Godly men mistakenly do? to her that he cares about her feelings, powerfully communicating (as long as he is
Out comes the husband to “clobber her over the head” with the wife” submission being sincere and NOT “faking this” of couse) that this is not about his own “desires”.
verses, as if that’s going to help unlock the gate!!! Love-not-force more easily “unlock” women’s “gate”, as the wife is here by assured of
(Mind you, it is fully understadable thing as to why a man would do this, as we men, her importance to and love by her husband, that he is not about for his own “self-
too, are mere mortals ourselves. And indeed, doing this is common mistake which interest” but is instead ministering, caring, and loving her as Christ so selflessly loves
some could have made, if they had not first been able to have learned of the TRUTH. the Church.
So, When the husband tries to use the “wife” submission” verses when the “GATE is” And thus is she then made more able to TRUST the sincerity of her husband.
locking up”, he is only making the “locked gate;”even that much “locked” stronger And once he effectively “unlocks” that “Gate”, she is more willing to explore the
against himself! possibility of then meaty truth of Christian polygamy, to eventually proceed through
the process of “paradigm-shifting”, Where by old norms and old ways of her thinking
Why? are changed willingly and gladly of her own volition.
Embracing-polygamy wives of husbands among us surely need further assurance and
Again, its not that his wife is being “disobedient”, Rather, he himself is scaring her by comfort that this is not about the “Self-interest” of her husband. ( Such women are
him having the appearance that all about” is what he wants, appearing as being selfish not” wrong” to have this “suspicion” at this tie). Its men’s responsibility to love them,
man who will exploit scripture to self-justify his self-exaltation. so profoundly that they help the wife to no longer have that suspicion.
And in that, the dear woman doesn’t know what to do.
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You can give a wife motivation to even contemplate Christian polygamy. So, the Bible: Deuteronomy 25:5-10; “if brothers dwell together, and one of them dies and has
thing is it’s not about suggesting that a husband has to supposedly “earn” his wife’s not son, the widow of the dead man shall not be married to a stranger outside the
obedience, as that is not the point. Rather this is about having true power in the Spirit family; her husband’s brother shall go into her, take her as a wife, and perform the
by teaching such profound message of love in receiving the spirit of wisdom and of duty of a husband’s brother to her”. And it shall be that the firstborn son whom she
revelation on how, to understand how a woman thinks, and “unlocks” the “gate”. bears will succeed to the name of his dead brother and this name may not be blotted
The bottom line of all this is that women need not to be taught the “wife submission” out of Israel. But if the man does not want to take his brother’s wife, then let his
verses when it comes to Christian polygamy. Rather, we can more help women be brother’s wife go up to the gate of the Elders and say, “my husband’s brother refuses
able to embrace Christian polygamy by understanding how to unlock the gate, by to raise up a name to his brother in Israel; he will not perform the duty of my
building TRUST and showing that man really does care. And that is what we really husband’s brother”. If the elders talk to him and he totally refuses to take her then he
need to focus on the truth teaching MEN how to grow, grow, and grow in humble will be cursed. He shall be called in Israel “the house of him who had his sandal
Christ-like love. I do pray that I have clarified some things where anyone may have removed”. Literally to me if a man does not perform then this man is considered
needed it. “dead” in that sense for he will not fertilise his wife or wives at all. We are asked by
You’ve got to have a sense of humour to think you can get away with telling women the Bible to judge wisely.
to share their husbands. None is willing to discuss this for fear of being thought as Tell me something, “must we wait until this man dies physically, burry him then
somehow unclean. believe that he is dead and gone then we can now let his brother perform his duty?
Mark you I have witnessed single ladies who loved the Lord, release years of bent- What if this man dies when his wife is past the age of giving birth? One more
up frustration. It is difficult, for a woman to say to her best friend, “oh by the way, question please “suppose this man does not respond at all in the field of his duty, how
how about we share your husband, would you mind”? If our lives are to be what he should this wife live? Bearing in mind that the Bible gives her an okay to go ahead
Lord wants them to be we MUST be OPEN to his WILL whatever it may be. and marry instead of burning in passion?” As any normal human being this woman
There are wives who could never be happy until they chained the very thought of will automatically opt for sex outside marriage secretly. Isn’t there a way to help
their husbands! Selfish!! Isn’t it? Watch out the words of Isaiah 4:1. We need the someone in such a situation, to live a holy life and go to heaven than to let her go to
Holy Ghost to intervene and confirm this message to you. Courage! Courage! Finally hell? Should we entertain the Holier than thou attitude?
a man is wiling to be Lord of his wives. Now my final word is this, “virtually every This and many other circumstances are assumed and left unattended hence leads many
woman, who is willing to submit to a man as her lord, can have a husband”, Sarah, to live immoral lives. Jesus asked, “is it right to see a cow in a ditch and let it to die
Abraham’s wife is a good example of a lady who referred to her husband as lord. just because it is your resting day (a Sabbath day), and that you are on your way to
Church”?
Are you to do well on the Sabbath or assume that nothing is going wrong, or assume
Are we becoming too spiritual until we forget that we are in the body? that nothing goes wrong on a Sabbath day? Is going to Church on your Sabbath day
the way to worship God? Consider the Good Samaritan’s case.
What is a wife supposed to do in case her husband is not functional sexually? Assumption is a very dangerous disease. More worse than HIV/AIDS. Because we
fail to address our important and yet, urgent daily affairs in a godly way and
He does not perform at all? Can this man borrow his brother’s services or a friend’s atmosphere, many things are left in a mess.
services to supplement the services he can not offer his wife or wives? Immorality is on the rise, rampant spread of diseases, hatred creeps in, and divorces
Refer the book of Genesis 16:1-4 Sarah’s case. Sarah gave her maid to her husband everywhere. There is no peace in families and in Churches and all over the world.
to supplement her infertility. That she may bear her children. At no time did God People refrained from thinking and openly talking of important and yet urgent matters
condemn this act, neither is it condemned at any one point in the entire Bible. touching our lives, our families, our people and our friends.
Also go to the book of Genesis 30:1-24 we can see Jacob’s two wives supplement Take it for example, a man gets married to a lady who does not have a biological
their child bearing through their maids. They gave their maids to their husband opening (vulva /vagina ), will this man be contented that he is married and enjoy sex
(Jacob) to have sex with them and give birth for them children who could be counted and expect children from her? What if she has everything but barren, you may enjoy
as these two wives children and not of the maids. This is Biblical and it is acceptable. sex but will you expect children from the same? How will you supplement the issue of
Consider this other case!! If a man dies, his brother is supposed to take his wife or getting children? What if a lady is married to a man who does not function at all,
wives and lie with them to bear children for him. If this man’s brother refuses God impotent or does not perform at all? Can such a lady feel married and be content to
will curse him or kill him for refusing to raise his brother’s name. Quotations from the enjoy sex and have children from the same man?
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Am I talking of myths, or real life happening and hard facts? Is it factual or fiction? profit; if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can faith save him? If a
But don’t we still fool ourselves that such things don’t exist nor happen and affect us brother or sister is naked and destitute of daily food, and one of you says to them,
in several levels of life? depart in peace, be warmed and filled,” but you do not give them the things which are
What will we do, or what do you do in such occasions? How could you react to such NEEDED for the BODY, what does it profit? Thus also faith by itself, if it does not
circumstances? Just be yourself, real and led by The Spirit of God when answering have works, is dead. But someone will say, “You have faith and I have” Show me
these questions. your faith without works, and I will show you my faith by my works. You believe that
Well, some divorce, and many again. Some go ahead and stay in a miserable there is one God, you do well. Even the demons believe and tremble! But do you
marriage just because they wedded, adopt children and assume they are all right. want to know, O foolish man, that faith without works is dead? Was not Abraham our
Some just pretend to stay together as couples with double standards. They are more of father justified by works when he offered Isaac, his son on the alter? Do you see that
wife, and husband and never friends. Call them two strangers or foreigners living faith was working together with his works, and by works faith was marked perfect?
under one roof. A life full of oppressions, depressions, stress, straining, sadness, And the scripture was fulfilled which says, Abraham believed God, and it was
madness, hopelessness and finally a life without direction and purpose. Will such a accounted to him for righteousness”. And he was called a friend of God. You see
situation allow one think of worshipping God really? then that a man is justified by works, and not faith only? Likewise was not Rahab the
Come now and let us reason together for heaven’s sake. harlot justified by works when she received the messengers and sent them out another
Without pretence! No hypocrisy! Be 100% Real. way? For as the body without spirit is dead, so Faith without works is also dead. It
The book of Galatians 6:2-5. Share one another’s problems, and so obey our Lord’s edifies the Church when we get concerned with the works that edify the body, our
commandment. If any man thinks he is too great to stoop to this, he is fooling himself. brother and sister’s bodies and ours. Hey guys can we start thinking right and act on
He is really a no-body. the same to set things in order? Can we be fair to our wives, and be open, and keep an
Let everyone be sure that he is doing the very best, for then he will have a personal open communication when we don’t deliver our services?
satisfaction of work well done and won’t need to compare himself with someone else. See advice on how to raise such an issue and discuss on the same with your wife or
Each one of us must bear some faults and burdens of his own. Galatians 5:16. I wives from this book. All you need to do in such a case is to humble yourself, be
advise you to obey only the Holy Spirit’s instructions. He will tell you where to go yourself, sincere, real, step down and reason with your wife and she will respect you
and what to do Galatians 5:18. forever and be there for you.
When you are guided by the Holy Spirit, you need no longer force yourself to obey How can such services be supplemented? Can a brother or a friend offer you some
Jewish laws. Look at the law and get to know its role. Galatians 3:23-29. But before help, if your wife and you agree? Isn’t it possible? Jesus tells you whatever you two
faith came, we were kept under guard by the law, kept for the faith which would agree binding or loosing the same is done in heaven.
afterwards be revealed. Therefore the Law was our tutor to bring us to the master Sarah (Abraham’s wife) borrowed such services of raising children through her maid
(Christ), that we might be justified by faith. Also look at this that Jesus left this world before God gave her the promised son. Remember God did not condemn that act.
and sent us a comforter and a helper, who is the Holy Spirit as our guider. Also Jacob’s two wives supplemented their services of bearing children using their
Listen to what Jesus is telling you right now; Matthew 25:34-40 then the King maids. Was it a sin? Such acts are taking place in our societies all over Kenya and the
(Jesus) will say to those on the right hand, “Come you blessed of My Father, inherit entire world at large.
the Kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world; for I was hungry and Also even when a man does not function or perform, it has happened that services are
you gave me food; I was thirsty and you gave me drink; I was a stranger and you took borrowed from either brother or a friend.
me in; I was naked and you clothed me; I was sick and you visited me; I was in prison What?!!! How can that happen? Are you mad or dreaming man of God?!!! No sir
and you came to me.” Then the righteous will answer Him, saying, “Lord, when did or madam. There is neither madness nor dream here. No kidding. All I am talking is
we see you in such situations and helped you?” And the King (Jesus) will answer and factual. We have to come clear on such topics if we are to retain moral standards in
say to them, “Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of our society. Well if you are shy and feel I have gone too far, come on tell us what to
these my brethren, you did it to me.” And to those on His left hand, Jesus said do in such circumstance to revive our rotten society.
“Assuredly, I say to you, in as much as you did not do it to one of the least of these, When you don’t deliver services, temporally or literally you are dead in that sense
you did not do it to me.” People of God don’t you get the message of our Lord Jesus and in that area in one way or the other. In case of death what happens to your mate or
Christ? The only way to worship God is to be concerned with our neighbour. Loving partner? Read the book of Matthew 12:19-25 and Deuteronomy 25:5. So why pretend
him as you love yourself. And loving in action and not in words for love without acts and cause tension in your family for nothing. For how long do you want to hold
is dead even as faith without action is dead. The Book of James 2:14-26 what does it people in that situation? Easy men!!!
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Wake-up and address that problem now, or else, you are promoting immorality, and Finally, I put it to you this way that if something is not working right in your family
the spread of diseases causing more deaths, and also letting many live in or marriage you better talk about it and make sure you have a solution in time, lest you
humiliation.Women are crying out there. Who is gonna listen and help? let it be a time bomb. When its time comes to explode you are done or very little can
be done if any. What follows are regrets, “had I known”. Know now or else!!! I
Our dear ladies, what do you have to say? accept that initially it seems a very difficult and a painful exercise but for God’s sake
For how long will you be too possessive? If you don’t realise and open up and grow take it easy. God wants you to seek peace with all people. God bless you as you
woe unto you. You know that you don’t deliver your services to your man. How can ponder about this. You are saying that this man is crazy and out of his senses and evil
you assume nothing is wrong? minded. That is why he is thinking of such evil situations. You are right according to
Not only about service delivery but open up to Christian polygamy for heaven’s sake your own thinking capacity, the understanding, and according to the measure of grace
and if you care for these others, loving them by actions. If you don’t change, change given to you.
will change you. You will be forced to learn the hard way. Why wait until then? Go Note this dear friend!!! The Bible tells you this; if you think you know everything;
ahead and open up and be grown up. Discuss with your man about it. Give him you know nothing yet, as you ought to. Learning has no end. For this purpose, God
freedom to bring in someone to help you deliver or supplement your services and you converted Saul to Paul and made him an Apostle to the Gentiles and appointed him to
will retain your position, dignity and love. Do you want to wait until your man sneaks set most things right which were never addressed. That he may expound them to the
out of your marriage, and maybe from home? people to understand and then set them right.
You can pray to God but remember that God has given you a brain to use. God did That is to tell you that I think I have the Spirit of God. He called and chose me an
not create you as a robot to act automatically, but that you can think, feel, decide and Apostle and commissioned me to address important and urgent issues that many
choose on what to do for your benefit. preacher and teacher have given a deaf ear and blind eye.
Easy ladies!! Don’t e envious and greedy for nothing. Mind you, God can let such Remember that the Bible says, that they have ears but they don’t hear; eyes they have
situations to meet you that He may see how you will deal with it. If you are married, I but won’t see. What is it then, my dear friends?
know that you love that man for sure but for God’s sake be flexible to accommodate NB: this calls for; the power of concept. There is no greater thing than an idea. An
your fellow ladies who are lonely in this world, and are badly in need of a shoulder to idea is the raw material of the concept. If you have a wrong concept then the
lean on. Only then can you say that you love God in actions and not in mere words. conclusion is wrong, hence misconception. Ideas are invisible hence a concept is
The Bible says, “Love one another in action and not in word, and also count another created to project an idea. The original concept is in the source of it. No man knows
better than yourself then God will lift you”. For whoever lifts himself or herself is the thoughts of a man except the Spirit of God. Many a times we experience
abased, and him who humbles himself or herself is lifted. Remember that nothing new misconceptions because we have a wrong concept on such important issues of life.
is taking place that has never occurred before. All are just but a mere repetition. Also Ezekiel 36:26-27; and I will give you a new heart. I will give you new and right
remember that marriage is only and only here on earth. desires and put a new spirit within you. I will take out your stony hearts of sin and
In heaven there is no marriage. None will recognise you as so and so’s wife or give you new hearts of love. And I will put my spirit within you so that you will obey
husband, nor will anyone look down upon you as being second, third or seventh wife, my laws and do whatever I command.
you had children or not. Don’t wait for your man to run away, and turn wild against Our number one problem is that we do not control circumstances. John 10:34 in
you for nothing. I want to put it to you that, “God tells you daily that His people your own law it says that men are gods. We are co-workers with God in the Kingdom
perish or got into captivity because they lack knowledge”, Isaiah 5:13; “Therefore my of God here on earth. God gave man dominion over everything He created – to
people have gone into captivity, because they have no knowledge; their honourable control it but man failed. This is why we have failed to realise this failure and ask God
men are famished, and their multitude dried up with thirst.” to restore us the power of concept, which makes us misconceive the whole idea of life
Talk now and be fair to your man. Just wear his shoes and walk for a mile or two, here on earth. Remember that in heaven there is no marriage and its funny happenings
and you will know how it pains and hurts. If you think you will be comfortable in that we see around the world. It all starts and ends right here on earth. And yet once
such shoes, well, let him suffer but later you may have yourself to blame. again I say let each and every one of you be fully convinced on what he or she
God says that He wants mercy and not sacrifices. For heaven’s sake show mercy to believes. Romans 14:22; don’t condemn yourself on what you approve. 1John 3:11-
your man and God’s peace is gonna be upon you forever. 24; love shares itself with others, in actions-laying down your life for others. 1John
The Bible says that God has given each one of us a measure of grace. I think you 4:1-21; love tests every message.
know what I mean. If not ask God’s Holy Spirit to help you understand this. Don’t just believe everything people say but test and see if it really is a message from
the Holy Spirit.
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Being alive means that, you are in tune with your body, mind and spirit. Are you them and thoroughly bad. They will be hard-headed and never give in to others, they
emotionally alive? Your emotions are very important signals in your life for your will be constant liars and troublemakers, they will be rough and cruel, and sneer their
information. Refer to the book of James 1:19-27; hearing, doing, listen much but friends; they will be hot-headed, puffed-up with pride, and prefer good times to
speak little. Don’t be angry. Just get rid of what is wrong in your life, both inside and worship God. They will go to Church, yes, but they won’t really believe anything they
outside. Remember to obey and not just to listen. hear. Don’t be taken in by people like that.
Your religion isn’t worth much if you don’t care for Orphans and Widows not in
word but in deed or actions. Also love your neighbour just as yourself NB: John 21:25
Matt. 18:18-20 Not everything is written in the Bible and that is why we have the Holy Spirit to help
And I, tell you this, whatever you bind on earth is bound in heaven, and whatever you us, teach us, guide us and comfort us while giving us instructions.
set free on earth will be freed in heaven.
I also tell you this, If two of you agree down here on earth concerning anything you THE CHRISTIAN AND HIS CONSCIENCE
ask for, my Father in heaven will do it for you.  Warning against a critical spirit. Read these books below:
For where two or three gather because they’re mine, I will be right there among them. Romans 14:1-7 (Living Bible) Receive one who is weak in the faith, but not to dispute
Reefer: over doubtful things. For one believes he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats
 John 20:23 only vegetables.
 Matt. 28:20 Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat
 Matt: 18:19 judge him who eats; for God has received him. To God he eats or to God he does not
 James 5:16 – Admit your faults one to another eat and gives thanks. None lives for himself nor dies for himself.
1 John 3:21-22: But dearly loved friends, if our conscience are clear, we come to the Matthew 7:1-7 - Judge not
Lord with perfect assurance and trust, obeying him and doing the things that please I have always wondered why some funny things happen in the lives of saved brethren.
him. And this is what God says we must do; Believe on the Name of his Son Jesus Sinful acts according to man’s judgement. Then I came across the marriage of the
Christ, and Love one another. Those who do what God says – they are living with man of God, Hosea.
God and Him with them. We know this is true because the Holy Spirit he has given us Read the book of Hosea. God commanded Hosea to go and marry a wife of harlotry
tells us so. an children of harlotry.
 She got children with Hosea
Personal and Pastoral Conduct:  Later she got married to another man and left those other children with
Remind your people of these great facts, and command them in the name of the Lord Hosea.
not to argue over unimportant things. Be humble when you teach those who are mixed  She got other children with the other man
up concerning the truth. For if you talk meekly and courteously to them, they are more  Go again, love a woman who is loved by a lover and is committing
likely, with God’s help to turn away from their wrong ideas and believe what is true. Adultery
Then they will come to their senses and escape from Satan’s trap of slavery to sin  Note : Hosea 1:1-3 and 3: 1-2
which he uses to catch them whenever he likes, and then they can begin doing the will You find out that when God calls you and chooses to use you,
of God. He has to school you. That is why you find that certain circumstances take place
in your life. What you want to do, you don’t do, and what you don’t want to do, those
The coming of Apostasy: you do!!!
God trains you, gives you experience and uses you as His servant or as an
It is going to be difficult to be a Christian in the last days. Indeed we are facing example to accomplish his purpose. Now I know why I pass through so many
difficult times. trying moments or situations, hence I have nothing to worry about but to know
that my Lord is in control of my life.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 Take for example that man who was born blind. The disciples wanted to know by
You may as well know this too, Timothy that is in the last days it is going to be very whose sins was that man blind, his or his parents’ sins.
difficult to be a Christian. For people will love only themselves and their money; they Jesus told them that it was purposed to demonstrate God’s healing power that many
will be proud and boastful, sneering at God, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful to could give God the glory.
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This man was predestined to be born blind, for that purpose. All scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, reproof, for
Remember that Jesus said that even some diseases and illnesses are not meant to correction and for instruction in all righteousness. So that the man of God may be
death but to give God glory. complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work. Matt. 11:25-26. The word of
God is hidden from the wise and prudent and it is revealed to Babes. John 8:31-32 you
POINT TO NOTE: shall know the truth and the truth shall set you FREE.
As a kind of Punishment, wives could be given to other men:-
God will give their wives to others Jer. 8:10. A Challenge
Reference: Deut. 28:30 - Someone else will marry your fiancé. Was Jesus against the Sabbath when He worked on that day?
Jer. 6:12 - Their enemies shall live in their homes and take their fields and wives. What of David, was it counted for him sin when he felt hungry and entered into the
Jer. 38:22 - But if you refuse to surrender, the Lord has said that all women left in your house of God, ate the showbread and gave to others?
palace will be brought out and given to the officers of the Babylonian army. Deut. 20:
12-14; Job 31:10; Isa. 65:21; Amos 5:11; Josh. 8:2, 11:14; 2 Chron. 14:13-15.
This simply means that God is not against having many wives and that woman who
got out of any unworthy or unfavourable relationship or marriage can be married to WIDOWS, ORPHANS, THE DISABLED, THE POOR AND THE NEEDY
another man.
WIDOWS
Types of Marriage Ceremonies 1 Corinthians 7:39
1. Expensive weddings in the Church are neither mandatory nor necessary. This A wife is bound by the law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is
type of wedding has confused many Christians thinking that it is a must for at liberty (Free) to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.
everyone to perform such, causing many to opt cohabitation or come-we-stay. But sincerely if no one notices and addresses these people in the Church, how can they
2. Laying hands on the couple simply after the service. It is a holy and acceptable marry in the Lord?
ceremony but many Christians don’t like it simply because it is not prestigious Initially this was a duty best left to a dead husband’s brother, but it has reached a
like the first one above. time when people run away form their obligations hence compelling our dear sisters to
3. Customary marriage Ceremony; parents agree and hand over their girl to a operate either harlotry or marry outside the Church and outside the family.
man. Sometimes if the lady is not willing to be married within that family she is free to
Refer the following books: choose who to marry her, and it is no sin. Many Christian brothers count it a sin when
Gen. 11:29; Gen. 29:15-30; Gen. 21:20-21; Gen. 24:31-52; Gen 24:57- it comes to taking a dead brother’s wife, but where in the Bible is it written?
60; 2 Chron 24:2-4 Genesis 38: 8-10
See how Onan refused to take (Er’s) brother’s wife. Verse 10 and this thing which he
did displeased the Lord, therefore He killed him also. For this cause Paul has given
Dowry widows permission to be married by a man of their choice in the Lord; 1 Tim. 5:1-7;
Rom. 7:2; 1TIM 5:3-16
Is it Biblical?
Payment of dowry is Biblical and acceptable.
Read the books below: 1 Corinthians 7:8-9
Gen. 29:18, 20; Hosea 12:12; Hosea 3:2; But I say to the unmarried and to widows; it is good for them if they remain even as I
Ruth 4:10; Exo. 22:16; Gen. 34: 11-12; Gen 24:53 am (Paul); but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to
Is Dowry payment Mandatory? marry than to burn with passion.
Dowry is necessary for it is a token which acts as a point of contact or a connector
between the two families. It is not strictly a must. There are so many marriages in the WIDOWS AND MARRIAGE
Bible whereby dowry was not involved. For those widows who have relatives let them take care of them. But as for those who
2 Timothy 3:16-17 are really widows and have no one to turn to, the Church can take care of them.

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Let the widows marry, especially the young widows let them marry and get children. There are wives who could never be happy until they chained the very thought of
They have freedom to marry whoever they choose; within or without the family, but in their husbands! Selfish!! Isn’t it? Watch out the words of Isaiah 4:1
the Church. Woe to those saved Christians who refuse to care for them. Some use We need the Holy Ghost to intervene and confirm this message to you.
HIV/AIDS as an excuse, but you can confirm the cause of her husband’s death. If she Courage! Courage! Courage!
is a victim, offer financial assistance and some other help. Did you know that God can Finally a man is willing to be Lord of his Wives.
curse you if you joke with a widow? He is a husband of widows. Handle them with Now my final word is this, “virtually every Woman, who is willing to submit to a man
tender care if you want a blessing from God. as her Lord, can have a husband”. Consider Sarah who referred Abraham as her Lord.
More so there is a way you can handle those with disabilities or setbacks such that
they feel loved, needed and cared for. James says, “Show me your faith without works CONCERNING ORPHANS, THE DISABLED, THE POOR AND THE NEEDY:
and I will show you my faith by works” Many use economical factors as an excuse.
Remember that silver and gold belong to God who richly gives to his people by Christ The people of God need to bring food and many other things like, clothes (used, or
Jesus. new), shoes, animals, and others into the store house of God which is the church so
that there may be plenty to give those s in need. But it is surprising, and shocking that
CAN A DIVORCED WOMAN OR MAN BE MARRIED? people don’t value giving anymore, even paying tithes and giving offerings to the
church which is a refuge to the Orphans, widows, disbled, the poor and the needy.
{LBV} 1 Corinthians 7:15-17 But if the husband or wife who isn’t a Christian is eager How then do we expect our shepherds to feed the sheep, which are hungry, where
to leave, it is permitted. there is no pasture? May God give you revelation, understanding and a burden on the
In such cases the Christian husband or wife should not insist that the other stay; for same. Malachi. 3:10-12
God wants his children to live in peace and harmony. For after all, there is no
assurance to you wives that your husbands will be converted if they stay; and the same
may be said to you husbands concerning your wives. SCRIPTURES AT A GLANCE
But be sure in deciding these matters that you, are living as God intended, marrying
or not marrying in accordance with God’s direction and help, and accepting whatever POLYMAMAY:
situation God has put you into. This is my rule for all the Churches. Having more than one wife, or concubines.
NB: 1 Cor. 7:12 Paul says, “Here I want to add some suggestions of my own. Examples:
These are not direct commands from the Lord, but they seem right to me. Gen: 4:9; 16:2-3; 26:34, 29:18-30
Also; Verse 17(a) be sure in deciding on these matters I Sam 1:2; I Sam 24:43; I king 11:1; Dan. 5:2- 4
Remember that Paul was full of the Holy Ghost when he was talking these. God wants Tolerated:
his children to live in peace and harmony. So as God’s child don’t be chained with Exd. 210; 2 Chro. 24:3 Priest arranged two marriages for Joash.
non-believers. You are free to choose to leave or to stay in such a relationship. This Laws concerning:
shows you that we are given authority and power to loose and bind anything here on Lev 1817, Lev: 18: 9; Deut. 27:20
earth, forgive sins, and agree on anything as believers and our God will do the same Lev 18:18 Duet: 21:15
for He is with us in our midst. If you didn’t know that, thank God for now you know. Authorised:
And let the truth se t you free. 2 Sam 12:8 REF: 2 SAM 12:1-9 David was rich in wives and God was willing to give
Point to note and remember; you’ve got to have a sense of humour to think you can him even more than killing Uriah and taking his only one wife.
get away with telling women to share their husbands.
None is willing to discuss this for fear of being thought as somehow Unclean. Mark POLYGAMOUS MARRIAGES
you; I have witnessed single ladies who love the Lord Release years of bent up
frustrations. It is difficult, for a woman to say to her best friend, “Oh, by the way, how LAWS GOVENRING
about we share your husband, would you mind”?” Lev. 18:17 you may not marry both a woman and her daughter
If our lives are to be what the Lord wants them to be, we MUST be OPEN to his Lev. 18:18 you shall not marry two sisters but if your wife dies you can marry her
WILL whatever it may be. sister
Lev. 18; Do not have sexual intercourse with any of your fathers’ wives.
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Lev. 18:9 Do not have sex with your sister or half –sister, brought up in same nothing unclean by itself, but to him who considers anything to be unclean, to him is
household or elsewhere. unclean.
Deut. 27: 20 Cursed is one who commits adultery with one of his fathers’ wives. *Paul puts it this way*
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Two are better than one, three even better for a three braided Phil. 2: 12 (b) but how much more in my absence, WORK OUT your own Salvation
cord is not easily broken. with fear and trembling.
You know exactly what is good and necessary for your life. Your wants, Needs
Two Marriages at once desires, etc, Needs to be worked out by none other than yourself.
2 Chron 24:2-3 Joash did what was right in the sight of the lord all the day s of 1 Peter. 4:8 and above all things have fervent lover for one another, for love covers a
Jehoiada the Priest. And Jehoiada took for him two wives, and he had sons and multitude of sins. 1 peter 4:9 be hospitable to one another without grumbling. 1 Pter
daughters. 4: 10 as each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the
Adornment, Ornaments –Beauty & Clothing. MANIFOLD grace of God.
Ezek. 16:8- 14: Gen; 24:22, 47 James: 2:15 if a brother or sister is naked and destitute of daily food, and one of you
Isa 3; 18:19 says to them, “Depart in peace, be warmed and filled” but you do not give them the
Neck chains, nose ring, earrings, bracelets, ornaments, finger rings, wrist chains, Hair things which are needed for the body, what does it profit? Show me your faith without
styles, clothes etc. works or acts. It is dead brother. Have Faith and Works or Acts. WATCH OUT:

WIDOWS: TRADITIONS AND CUSTOMS


Teaching concerning:
 Rom; 7:2;1 1 Cor 7:32 WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY ABOUT THE JEWISH AND THE
 I Tim 5: 3;1 I Tim 4:5-8 GENTILE BELIEVERS?
 I Tim 4:14-16
 Laws concerning:  Must they follow the Jewish customers, and traditions?
 Exd. 22:22; Duet 16 11: Duet 25:5  Acts 21:20-25
 Discussion by the Council
OPHANS  Act. 15: 16-35
Oppression of condemned:  Apostles and church elders set a further meeting to decide over a number of
 Prov. 23:10, 11; Isa 10:2; Jer. 5:28 ; Jer. 7:6; Jer. 22:23 ; Malachi. 3:5 issues and then after went from city to city making known the decision
LAWS CONCERNING  Concerning Gentiles
DIVORCE  Paul had his head shaved according to Jeweish custom, for he had taken a
 A man divorcing, a wife or a wife divorcing, a man? Vow: Acts 18; 18
 Exd 21:8,10 Deut. 24:1 Math 5;32 Ezra 10:3 1 Cor. 7:15  Matt. 8:2; Mark. 1:40-44; Lk 5:12-14-Jesus tells the man he healed to offer
 To sum up Brethren be your brother’s keeper. Stop being selfish and greedy, for his cleansing these things which Moses commanded.
envious and hypocritical. Customs and traditions are not all bad nor are they sinful unless they are against God
 Math. 7:9 what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will or against the Holy Scriptures.
give him a stone?
 Finally if you must condemn or judge, just go a head and do it. You have
your right to defer, and your freedom of speech, but remember this one thing: MINISTERS OF MERCY:
Matt 11:18-19 For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they said, “He has a
demon”. The son of man (Jesus) came eating and drinking, and they said, “Look a We are called to the service of God and our fellow men. We spend our lives within
gluttonous man and wine bibber, and a friend of tax collectors and sinners!” But the circle of the home; we may engage in life’s common vocations, or go as teachers to
wisdom is justified by her children. By the way, what has Jesus told you to other lands. But all are called to be missionary ministers for God. Ministers of mercy
specifically ask from the Father (God)? How much is whatever or how many is to the world. All of us with fresh talents, energy and courage, our quick
whatsoever, or what exactly is whatsoever? I know and I am convinced that there is
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susceptibilities, are loved of God. He desires to bring us into harmony with divine These are the precious opportunies for those who will make their homes a blessing to
agencies. others.
We are to obtain an education that will help us to stand by the side of God’s unselfish Social influence is a wonderful power. We can use it if we will as a means of
service. helping those about us. Our homes should be a place of refuge for the tempted youth.
We are representatives of God, to reveal His Spirit, to manifest His character, and to Many there are who stand at the parting of the ways. Every influence, every
do His Work. The elements of character that make a man truly successful and impression, is determining the choice that shapes their destiny both here and hereafter.
honoured among men, the irrepressible desire for some great good, the indomitable Evil invites them. Its resorts are made bright and attractive. They have a welcome
will, the strenuous application, the untiring presence; are NOT to be discouraged. By from every corner. All about us are youths who have no home, and many whose
the Grace of God they are to be directed to the attainment of objects as much higher homes have no helpful, uplifting power, and the youth drift into evil. They are going
than mere selfish and worldly interest, as the Heavens are higher than the earth. God down the ruin within the very shadow of our doors. These youths need a hand
desires us to become all that He has made it possible for us to be and to do our very stretched out to them in sympathy. Kind words simply spoken, little attentions simply
best with the power He has given us. bestowed, will sweep away the clouds of temptations, which gather over the soul.
Life is mysterious and sacred. It is the manifestation of God Himself, the source of The true expression of Heaven-born sympathy has power to open door of hearts that
all life. Precious are its opportunities, and earnestly should they be improved. Once need fragrance of God’s words and simple, delicate touch of the spirit of God’s love.
lost, they are gone forever. God presents valuable, ennobling truth that we may If we would show an interest in the youth, invite them into our homes or associations,
advance in a safe and sure path, in pursuit of abject worthy of the earnest engagement and surround them with cheering, helpful influences, there are many that would gladly
of all our capabilities. We are here for a purpose. God has given us His plan for our turn their steps into the upward path. Deuteronomy 15:11.
life, and He desires us to reach the highest standards of development. To many of us You shall open your hand wide unto your brother, the poor, the needy, in the Land.
an ambition is aroused to win distinction in scholarship and to gain position and God’s arrangements did not however, wholly do away with the poor for this is the
Honour in the world. means for the development of character. “If there be among you a poor man within any
The purpose for which God creted us is lost sight of, and the life is given up to selfish of your gates in your land which your God gave you, you shall not harden your heart,
and worldly pursuits. nor shut your hand from your poor brother.
As we pass along, let us make the most of life. The work to which we are called does But you shall open your hand wide unto him, and shall surely lend him sufficient for
not require wealth or social position or great ability. It requires a kindly, self- his need, in which he wanted. Deuteronomy 15: 7, 8. If you brother be waxen poor,
sacrificing spirit and a stead of fast purpose. A lamp, however small, if kept steadily and fallen in decay, you shall relieve him; Yea, though he be a stranger, or a sojourner;
burning, may be the means of lighting many other lamps. Our sphere of influence may that he may live with you”. Leviticus 25:35
seem narrow, our ability small, our opportunities few, we shall become channels for None need fear that their liberality would bring them to want. Obedience to God’s
currents of life-giving power. commandments would surely result in prosperity. “For this thing, God says,” the lord
From our homes will flow streams of healing, bringing life, and beauty, and your God shall Bless you in all your works, and in all that you put your hand unto”
fruitfulness where now are barrenness and death. You shall lend unto many nations, but you shall not borrow; and you shall reign over
As is in the case of Hospitality, we are supposed to share with the poor and strangers, many Nations, but they shall not reign over you”. Deuteronomy 15:10, 6. God can
or the feeble and aged, so often without a home, and struggling with poverty and much spread a table in the wilderness. There are Large-hearted men and women who are
discouragement. anxiously considering the conditions of the poor and what means can be found for
For example when you make a dinner or a supper, call not you friends, nor your their relief.
brothers, neither your kinsmen, nor rich neighbours, lest they also bid you again, and a How the unemployed and homeless can be helped and secure the common blessings of
recompense be made you. But when you make a feast, call the poor, the maimed, the God’s providence and to live the life He intended man to live, is a question to which
blind, the lame, and you shall be blessed, for they can not recompense you. many are earnestly endeavouring to find an answer.
These are guest who will lay on you no great burden to receive. You will not need to But there are not many, even among educators and statesmen, who comprehend the
make effort at display. The warmth of a genial welcome, a place at your fireplace, a causes that underlie the present state of society. Those who hold the reigns of
seat at your home table, the privilege of sharing the blessings of the hour of prayer, government are unable to solve the problem of Poverty, Pauperism, and increasing
would to many of these be like a glimpse of Heaven. crime.
Our sympathies are to overflow the boundaries of self and the enclosure of family It is of little use to reform others by attacking what we may regard wrong habits, such
walls. efforts often results in more harm than good.
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As the dew and still showers fall upon the withering plants, so let words fall gently God. Through the grace given us we may achieve victories that because of our own
when seeking to win men from error. God’s plan is first to reach the heart. We are to erroneous and preconceived, opinions, our defects of character, our smallness of faith,
speak the truth in love, trusting in Him to give it power for the reforming of the life. have seemed impossible.
The spirit will apply to the soul the word that is spoken in Love. To everyone who offers himself to the Lord for service, withholding nothing is given
Naturally we are self-centred and opinioned. But when we learn the lessons that God power for the attainment of measureless results. For these God will do great things.
desires to teach us, we become partakers of His nature, henceforth we live His life. He will work upon the minds of men so that, even in this world, there shall be seen in
The wonderful example of Jesus, the matchless tenderness with which He entered into their lives a fulfilment of the promise of the future state. The wilderness and the
the feelings of others, weeping with those who wept, rejoicing with those who solitary place shall be glad for them; and the desert shall rejoice even with joy and
rejoiced, must have a deep influence upon the character of all who follow Him in singing. They shall see the glory of the Lord, and the Excellency of our God,
sincerity. strengthen the weak hands, and confirm the feeble knees.
But kindly spoken words and acts they may receive will try to make the path easy for Say to them that are of a fearful heart; be strong-fear not, behold your God. They shall
weary feet. Of all people in the world, reformers should be the most unselfish, the obtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away. The greatest men of
kindest, and the most courteous. In their lives should be seen the true goodness of the earth are not beyond the power of a Wonder-Working God. If those who are
courtesy. Him who shows impatience at the ingorance or way-wardness of others, workers together with Him do their duty bravely and faithfully, God will convert men
who speak hastily or acts thoughtlessly, may close the door to such hearts so that he who occupy responsible places of intellect and influence. Through the power of the
can`t ever reach them. The Lord God has given you and me a tongue for teaching. Holy Spirit, many will be led to accept the divine principles.
That we should know how to speak a word in season to him, that is weary. When it is made plain that God expects them as His representatives to relieve suffering
All around us are afflicted souls. Here and there, everywhere, we may find them. Let humanity, many will respond, and will give of their means and their sympathies for the
us search out these suffering ones, and speak a word in season to comfort their hearts. benefit of the poor. As their minds are thus drawn away from their own selfish
Let us be channels through which shall flow the hope in trying circumstances; perhaps interest, many will surrender themselves to Christ.
troubles in the home life, that day by day weaken courage, confidence, and faith . With their talents of influence and means they will gladly be united in the work of
Those who are fighting the battle of life at great odds may be strengthened and beneficence with the humble missionary who was God’s agent in their conversion. By
encouraged by little attentions that cost only a loving effort. To such, the strong, a right use of their earthly treasures they will lay up for themselves a treasure in the
helpful grasp of the hand by a true friend is worth more than gold or silver. Words of Heavens that doesn’t fail, where no thief can approach, neither moth corrupted.
kindness are as welcome as the smile of angels. There are multitudes struggling with Riches and worldly honour cannot satisfy the soul. Many among the rich are longing
poverty, compelled to labour for small wages and able to secure but the barest for some divine assurance, some spiritual hope. Many long for something that will
necessities of life. Toil and deprivation, with no hope of better things, make their bring to an end the Monotony of their aimless lives. Men in official life needs
burden very heavy. When pain and sickness are added, the burden is almost something that they have not. Few among them don’t go to church; for they feel that
insupportable. Care-worn and oppressed, they know not where to turn for relief. they receive little benefit. The teaching they hear does not touch the heart. We need
Sympathise with them in their trials, their hearts-ache, and disappointments. to make personal appeal to them. Thousands in positions of trust and honour are
This will open the way for you to help them. Speak to them God’s promises, pray indulging inhabits that mean ruin to the soul and body. Ministers of the gospel,
with them, and for them, inspire them with hope. statesmen, authors, men of wealth and talent, men of vast business capacity, and power
Words of cheer and encouragement spoken to Himself. As hearts are cheered, the for usefulness, are in deadly peril because they do not see the necessity of self-control
heavenly angels look on in pleased recognition. From age to age the Lord has been in all things.
seeking to awaken in the souls of men a sense of their divine brotherhood. Be co- They need to have their attention called to the principles of temperance, not in a
workers with Him.The humblest workers, in cooperation with Christ, may touch narrow or arbitrary way, but in the light of God’s great purpose for humanity.
chords whose vibrations shall ring to the ends of the earth, and make melody Could the principles of true temperance thus be brought before them, there are very
throughout eternal ages. many of the higher classes who would recognise their value and give them a health
Heavenly intelligence are waiting to co-operate with human instrumentalities, that acceptance. This should show these people the results of harmful indulgences in
they may reveal to the world what human beings may become, and what, through lessening physical, mental, and moral power. It will help them recognise and realise
union with the Divine, may be accomplished for the saving of souls that are ready to their responsibility as stewards, of God’s gifts. This also will show them the good
perish. There is no limit to the usefulness of one who, putting self aside, makes room they would do with the money they now spend for that which does them only harm,
for the working of the Holy Spirit upon his heart, and lives a life wholly consecrated to instead be devoted to the relief of the sick poor, or for the training of children and
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youth for usefulness in the world, and who never stoop to the common forms of vice, Jehovah of Hosts is wonderful in counsel and excellent in wisdom Isaiah; 28:29. He
are yet brought to destruction through the love of riches. who taught Adam and Eve in Eden how to tend the garden desires to instruct men
The cup most difficult to carry is not cup that is empty, but the cup that is full to the today. He who fed multitudes with five loaves and two small fishes is able to give us
brim. It is this that needs to be most carefully balanced. Afflictions and adversity the fruit of our labour. Every association of life calls for the exercise of self-control,
bring disappointment and sorrow; but it is prosperity that is most dangerous to spiritual forbearance, and sympathy, we differ so widely indisposition, habits, education, that
life. So in deprivation and affliction the brightness of the unseen is with us to comfort our ways of looking at things vary. We judge differently. Our understanding of truth,
and sustain. Often prayer is solicited for those who are suffering from illness or and our ideas in regard to the conduct of life, are not in all respects the same. There
adversity; but our prayers are most needed by the men entrusted with prosperity and are no two whose experience is a like in every particular way. The duties that one
influence. In the valley of humiliation, where men feel their need and depend on God finds light are to another most difficult and perplexing.
to guide their steps, is comparative safety. So frail, so ignorant, so liable to misconception is human nature, that each should be
But men who stand, as it were on a lofty pinnacle, and who, because of their position, careful in the estimate he places upon another. We little know the bearing of our acts
are supposed to possess great wisdom-these are in greatest peril. Unless such men upon the experience of others. Many have borne so few burdens; their hearts have
make God their dependence, they will surely fall. The Bible condemns no man for known so little real anguish. They have felt so little perplexity and distress in behalf
being rich if he has acquired his reaches honestly. Not money, but the love of money of others that they can not understand the work of a true burden –bearer. God permits
is the root of all evil. It is God who gives men power to get wealth; and in the hand of men to be placed in positions of responsibility.
him who acts as God’s steward, using his means unselfishly, wealth is a blessing, both Love must be the governing principle in every thing. May God Bless the Work of our
to its possessor and to the world. But many absorbed in their interests in world Hands as we act on his Word. Deuteronomy 28:12
treasures become insensible to the claims of God and the needs of their fellow men.
They regard their wealth as a means of glorifying themselves. I WONDER WHICH WAY IS SAFE:
They add house to house, land to land; they fill their homes with luxuries, while
all about them are human beings in misery and crime, in disease and death. I never realised how complex human problems could be, until I got down to the level
These needs to have their eyes turned from the vanity of material things to behold the where problems were and asked God to help me to understand them.
preciousness the enduring riches.Then the need to learn the joy of giving the It is shocking to discover that most leaders cause many problems undergone by many
blessedness of being co-workers with God and the peace that God will give. people in our communities around the world.
The Lord bids us that are rich in this world that we trust not uncertain riches, but in the Problems of insecurity, lack of confindence fear, isolation, and lack of trust are too
living God, who gives us richly all things to enjoy; that we do good; that we be rich in common today amongst God’s people.Many people will never trust God’s servants
good works, ready to distribute, willing to communicate, ;laying up in store for enough to let them to help them. The reason is simple, they have been hurt and let
ourselves a good foundation against the time to come; that we lay hold on eternal life. down, so often in the past by such people that they do not want to experience the same
I Tim: 6:17-19. In most cases the true aims of Life are sacrificed. Life’s best things; anymore. And for this reason they built a wall of protection around their heart and
simplicity, honesty, truthfulness, purity, and integrity,- can not be bought or sold. only genuine love and concern demonstrated will melt those barriers. Until you are
They are free to the ignorant as to the educated, to the humble labourer as to the deep in problems, you will never learn who your true friends are.
honoured statesman. A good man is known by his truthfulness: A false man by deceit and lies. We are
For everyone God has provided pleasure that may be enjoyed by rich and poor a like;- surrounded by Enemies who are so intent upon destroying us. They are fierce lions-
the pleasure found in cultivating pureness of thought and unselfishness of action, the Hotheads whose teeth are sharp as spears and arrows. Their tongues are like swords.
pleasure comes form speaking sympathising words and doing kind deeds. From those Tragic fears grip us for they set a trap for us. They have dug a pitfall in our path. But
who perform such service the light of Christ shines to brighten lives darkened by many look!, They themselves will fall into it.
shadows. God’s Grace is suffiecient. There’s no way we can hope to have church growth if our
Jesus ate with publicans and sinners, and mingled with the common people not to leadership is weak and Governance culture corrupt. It is abundantly clear that all our
become low and earthly with them but in order by precept and example to present to problems originate from poor leadership, corruption, and lack of Transparency,
them right example and to uplift them from their earthiness and debasement. Jesus accountability, abuse of power and failure to put people first and a head of leadership.
sought to correct the world’s false standards of judging the value of men. Christ I wonder how we can restore the lost integrity.
workers are to meet the people where they are, and educate them, not in pride, but in If we cannot find peace, love and unity in the church then, a number of occasions there
character building. Help them to learn that Christ worked and denied Himself. are many servants of God with ill motives. Their Aims and Objectives are not to
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gather people and lead them to Christ, but gather them to crush them to hell. Such like Television, close out any distractions and say”, I am going to listen because I really
are money minded, but not saving souls.Ecclesiastes: 5:10 Gossip hangs on their lips. want to hear what you have to say”.
Use and Dump is their principle.Sincerity is never found in their Vocabulary.Deceit When you make a mistake, Jesus lifts you up, forgives you, and continues to treat you
and lying is all they play about. They are sweet talkers and their voices are like of with love and respect. Why not do the same to the people with whom you live, work
angels. When it is time to preach, they are the best Actors. I mean that people can be and worship with? When you feel lonely and insecure the Holy Spirit stays by your
great Actors. And most of us tend to play games with one another, to appear to be side, comforts you and assures you of God’s Love.
what we are not. But like chameleon they change their behaviours, opinions etc to suit Why not give Comfort and support to the people you love when they are going
their situations. Unless they change; change will change them for God is alive and through difficult Times?
awake 24 hours, Omnipresent, Omniscient and Omnipotent. Isa. 43:4 John 15:15 Mat. 28: 20 Psm. 103:13 if God does not want His children
wondering whether or not they are loved, why not express your own affections
OH….GOD HAVE MERCY ON US! regularly so that your family, friends, and co-workers know how you feel about them?
Some people are ignorantly and weakly double –tongued, but in the case of others Our superficial friendships will deepen into warm brotherly or sisterly
there is not only temperamental fickleness, there is Moral corruption. It is essential relationships.Our churches will multiply in effectiveness as people discover they can
that Gospel Ministers exercise strict control over themselves, lest they become both find love where Christ is worshiped.
preachers of the word and relaters of Gossip. This tragic state of affairs is more than a Thank God for people who are tender hearted, without them our lives could be barren
possibility. They must be aware of lust for information about other people’s business. and unfulfilling. Thank Him also that we can all grow in tenderness even those of us
They must be restrained in what they hear, Envy and Slander. They must cultivate the who are naturally tough.
habit of being true and avoiding all careless utterance. They must learn to safeguard
every confidence placed in them by other. It is Just and proper to call gossip, mud KEYS TOEFFECTIVE MINISTRY
slinging and slander, and classify it as what actually is –diabolical, dirty fiendish, Religion does not have the answer for all problems that we shall come up against. If it
atrocious, cruel, and being equal to murder. It is an evil habit that many people –more doesn’t then religion is not the Total answer. But God has provided totally for us and
so Christians engage in under the camouflage of righteousness, when they display an we need to realise there is no problem or person too hard for God, or you and me to
attitude of false godliness. The out come is normally very tragic for the Gossiper; bring through into victory away out. The Spirit of God, as well as the word of God is
because he or she is nothing but a grave digger and in most cases it happens that they challenging us today of the utmost importance of being able and effective ministers to
fall into the grave, which was dug for another by gossip. Those who indulge a the multitude of human needs all around us. Unless we learn to minister as Jesus did,
censorious spirit are guilty of greater sin than are the ones accused, for they not only these needs will never be properly met. (Matt 9: 35-38 and Luke 10:25-37) You are
commit the same sin, but add to it conceit and pride. A proud person may be challenged to be a labourer. Jesus as efficient, powerful and effective as He was was
deceived to believe that he alone is right, and is serving God more excellently than not able alone to meet the needs of the multitudes.
anyone else. Remember that all human beings are God’s beloved creations, and all Effective ministry demands:
are invited to receive forgiveness at the cross. If you grasp this truth you will begin to 1. Much labouring –a giving of oneself to the task at hand. And sticking with it till
see people and treat them tenderly. We will see people as potential brothers and the job is done.That type of disciple (minister today is still hard to find.
sisters. Remember that even Hotheads matter to God. And God’s treasures should be The needs of people have not changed for the better. If anything they have become
treated tenderly. worse and more complex. Jesus is our example as an effective minister to the needy
To learn tenderness, we hardhearted people need first begin to see as God sees. persons. The secret is finding God’s “Key” for that person’s life.
Secondly we must make ourselves walk a mile in the other person’s shoes. Tender- The question that is in many lips today is “how can we minister effectively to the
hearted people have a natural tendency to empathise with others, to feel what they are great needs of others?”
feeling. Hardhearted people, by contrast, can look at people who are hurting, broken Presuming that we ourselves are in the right relationship with Christ and are living
or upset and say, “They seem to be having a problem,” It is much easier for them to each day positively in His victory, there are definite answers to this question. Matt.
analyze others’s problems than to feel with them. Of course tenderness has to go 22:36-40: Mark 12:28-34
beyond feelings. But how should those feelings be expressed? Agape: Christians are called to a total love of God. To Him with all our Hearts, soul,
In a nutshell, scripture says that you treat people the way Jesus Christ treats you. Strength, and mind. This love must be demonstrated in action with our fellow human
When you pray, the Lord listens attentively to every word you say. Why not treat your beings (Neighbours). The giving up (Laying down)of our own will, desires and
spouses, children friends and co-workers the same way? Slow down, turn off your ambitions for God and our neighbours.
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of the gossip at one time or the other. Most have known the depression trying to track
2. Compassion down this spirit as it whispers its gossip through the local church, and the trusted
friends seem distant, established relationships shaken and the vision of the church
 True love for God and our fellowman, takes us to the cross –death to self, it quagmire in strife and in action. This enemy is not limited to attacks on local
means to have our bowels-(our hearts), the seat of feelings and affection. churches. Its attacks are also Nation-wide and world –wide. It is Time Christians
Yearning to pity, to show mercy, to have a desire of relieving the misearable, stopped judging each other instead stood by each other in Prayer and encouragement.
to suffer with another and to be affected in like manner. 1John 3:16. ECCESIATES: 7:21-22 – Also do not take to heart everything people say, lest you
 It means seeing someone in need and doing something about it. know that even you have cursed others.
3.Understanding This will be impossible until we guard against Gossip. Gossip is the Elder cousin of
 Love and compassion are beautiful but not totally adequate in Judging and faultfinding. JUDGE NOT!
ministering to deep human needs. We must get alongside those in Gossip is the, Elder cousin of Judging and fault finding, JUDGE NOT!
need and learn to understand them – each one individually. Prov. 23:23
 Sadly many people have been really hurt and wounded because there Get the facts at any price, and hold on tightly to all the good sense you can get.
was no understanding of the real problem. It takes time and patience Prov. 4:7 Getting wisdom is the most important thing you can do. And with your
to understand the deep-rooted needs we are faced with today. wisdom, develop common sense and good judgment.
Prov. 15:14
4. Responsibility A wise man is hungry for truth, while the mocker feeds on trash.
 We have to face up to the responsibility Prov. 18:15
 Don’t try to avoid it An intelligent man is always open to new ideas. In fact, he looks for them.
 Don’t run away from it John 8:32
 Just think of where you and I would be today if Jesus had not taken And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make (set) you free.
responsibility of our sins and rebellion. 2 Tim 3:16 -17 All scripture (whole) was given to us by inspiration from God and is
 Responsibility is the burden to see the ones you are helping brought useful to teach us what is true and to make us realise what is wrong in our lives: it
completely through and back into the right relationship with God. Where strengthens us out and helps us do what is right. It is God’s way of making us well
they too can stand unashamed in the community, giving praises and prepared at every point, fully equipped to do good to everyone.
Glory to God for being made. *(Col. 1: 27-29). Rom 15:4
The things that were written in the scripture so long ago are to teach us patience and to
RELIGION WITHOUT LOVE: encourage us, so that we will look forward expectantly to the time when God will
conquer sin and death.
 When Religious experience is devoid of Love, Jesus is never there. There 1 Peter 1:22
may be wonderful keenness of perception in discovering the defects of others. Now you can have real love for everyone because your souls have been cleansed from
 But to everyone who indulges in this spirit: Jesus says, “you Hypocrite, first selfishness and hatred when you trusted Christ to save you: so see to it that you really
cast out the beam out of your eyes, and then shall you see clearly to help your do love each warmly, with all your hearts.
brother cast them out of his Eyes”. John 13:34-35
Matt. 7:5- Those who are guilty of wrong are the first to suspect wrong. By “And so I am giving a new Commandment to you now; love each other just as much
condemning, they are trying to conceal or excuse the evil of their own hearts (LK: as I love you. Your strong love for each other will prove to the world that you are my
6:43) Not until you feel that, then could you sacrifice your own self-dignity, or even disciples”.
lay-down your life in order to save an erring one. Have you cast the beam out of your Ref. Rom 12:10 are kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love in honour
eyes so that you are prepared to help others? giving preference to one another and Heb.13:1-2Let brotherly love continue. Do not
No one has ever been reclaimed from a wrong position by censure and reproach, but forget to entertain strangers for by so doing some have entertained Angels without
many have been driven from Christ and led to seal their hearts against conviction. A realizing it.
tender spirit, a gentle and winning deportment may save the erring and hide a Rom 12:13
multitude of sins (James: 5:20). Nearly every Christin minister has faced the assault
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When God’s children are in need, you be the one to help them out. And get into the By self-enforced blindness to our emotions we limit our ability to navigate in the
habit of inviting guests home for dinner or, if they need lodging for the night. I f our world. We make blunders and repeat them.
lives are to be what the Lord wants them to be ,we MUST be OPEN to His WILL We need to use our feelings as cues to stay steady in life, and to act rationally. If we
whatever it may be. know for example, that we feel violent rage for someone and can admit this to
There are wives who could never be happy until thy chained the very thought of their ourselves, we are less likely to do violence to the person than if we hadn’t
husbands! Selfish!! Isn’t it? Watch out the words of Isaiah 4:1 acknowledged how we felt.
We need the Holy Ghost to intervene and confirm this message to you. The denied feeling-for example, the sexual desire toward someone out of bounds, is
Courage! Courage! the feeling mostly likely to take control of us. Before we know it, we have expressed
Finally a man is willing to be Lord of his Wives. rage or antipathy towards the Perons out of bounds to hide sexual attraction.
Now my final word is this, “virtually every Woman, who is willing to submit to a man
as her Lord, can have a husband”. BE YOUR OWN THERAPIST –TUNE UP YOUR EMOTIONS.
Your own emotions are the very stuff that psychotherapists work with. They are the
instruments that therapists want you to tune up for your own sake.
STAYING ALIVE EMOTINALLY: The best therapists never give advice, even to the patient who asks for it. Rather they
ask the patient many innumerable questions to help the patient understand his or her
In the course of a day you may experience a great range of feelings, such as fear, feelings.
dependence, confidence, exaltation, love. These feelings come and go, passing Only you can truly know what you feel, and no one else can tell you.
through you as flocks of birds crossing the sky. The inner life of even the least When you learn to identify your feelings easily, you will make the everyday decisions
evolved person is extremely rich. At different moments we experience fear, love, that best serve you. For you to become your own therapist, as we need to be, it’s vital
rage, exaltation, and hatred. There is nothing unnatural in having a kaleidoscope of that you have access to the greater range of your emotions.
personal emotions; to have a wide palette of emotions is to live. As forms of Let us suppose that a particular business client makes you feel that you are boring him
experience, your emotions are a blessing, a fact of your birthright. To be without any at a time.
particular emotion, to stifle any aspect of you, is to be diminished, to cheat yourself If you don’t identify this feeling, you may try to correct it, as by talking too fast, by
out of the fullness of being. Without recourse to our range of feelings, even becoming flustered, and leave out important points.
unpleasant feelings, we are unfulfilled. Your emotions can save your life. They were As soon as you identify your feeling that is diagnose yourself as anxious, breathless
invented for that purpose and the character that is cut off from his emotions is in a and hurried in this person’s presence you can stop hurrying. Instead you might make a
sorry state indeed, like those occasional children we read about who can’t feel pain. habit of asking this client, even during a conversation, if you notice him losing interest
You may delight in some of your feelings. “is this a good time for us to talk?” that seemingly simple question will put the person
You feel strong, competent, and young no matter what your age. In other moments On the notice to listen and it will earn you instant respect. Now you can make your
you feel loved and wanted. It doesn’t take much, a smile from your lover, moment of pitch slowly and fully, and have ten times the chance of closing the deal.
evident joy from your dog glad to see you at the end of the day. Once you know what you are feeling, you are in control. Therapists are themselves
Other encounters leave you with negative feelings. Your lover or boss looks greatly on their own emotions as the tool for diagnosing patients. For example, if a
disgruntled man or a woman you are interested in seems preoccupied when you call. certain patient always makes me feel heavy and burdened, I have to know it. He is
You feel momentarily like a loser. You may be tempted to shove a side such bad almost surely doing the same thing to other people, which could explain why his boss
feelings. Don’t! Good or bad, your emotions are your guidelines. Don’t be afraid of didn’t give him a promotion or why his wife left him. Identifying my feeling cues in
any emotion, even anger. The main reason for people’s systematically cutting to the kind of questions I can ask to discover what is really going on.
themselves off from their feelings is fear that if they allow the feeling in, they will do
something they will be sorry for. They repress their feelings, especially those at anger YOU NEED A HEALTHY BLEND OF EMOTIONS.
and sexual desire. People who do this go through life short-circuited; out of touch Some people seem to have overflowing emotions. For these people the challenge is to
with themselves, and this proves extremely costly. regulate how they express these emotions to the world.
If they deny having any emotions, they limit the richness of their own experience and The deeply emotional person has intense reaction to a great number of events in a day,
their empathy with others. including his or her own thoughts.

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If you are this kind of person, you see the importance in everything around you in friendship. It is a mistake to imagine that maturity implies reduced emotional range.
what people do and say, in events that have nothing to do with you. Maturity merely implies the ability to act with discretion, to select from among the
That is the good side-you live richly. The bad side is that you’re prone to say all kinds many prompting of a rich emotional life.
of things you will be sorry for. If you are not careful you can become irritating, and if
you are with a low intensity person you will drive him half mad.
Ideally, understand your emotions and enjoy them. But be careful about expressing all THE POWER OF CONCEPT.
your feelings to people who don’t care or hold them against you. If you express strong THE PURPOSE DRIVEN CHURCH
emotions, even though they are temporary to you, other people may hold you to them A PLACE WHERE DREAMS BECOME A REALITY
later. For instance, if you express intense excitement over a project that fails. People
may see you as gullible.If you show wild exuberance over a new person at the office, KEEP IT REAL
people may mistakenly think that you are endorsing that person. Remember two are better than one, but three even better.
When you are merely excited over the prospect of a new associate. In these cases,
your enthusiasm was just your typical way of getting into a project or of bounding DEFENDING GOD’S GRACE
with a new person. Acts 10: 34-48 Reff: Rom 2: 11, Job 34:19, Gal 2:6 Eph 6:9, Col. 3:11-25, I peter
But low-key people will remember you as ‘weird’ or ‘off-centre’ if the thing fails or 1:17
the person doesn’t workout. In other cases, if you show momentary anger, even Then Peter opened his Mouth and said; In Truth I perceive that God shows No
though you calm down instantly others may think of you as irascible or difficult. partiality. But in every nation whoever fears him and works righteousness is accepted
What is a momentary reaction for you is more durable for them. It is important for the by Him. While peter was speaking these words, the Holy Spirit fell upon all those
deeply emotional Person to guard against any one emotion, dominating at the expense who heard the word.
of the rest. If you always feel weighed down by some particular emotion, for example Acts: 11:1-18
you are regularly furious with people neglecting you. Or envious of your friend’s or Now the apostles and brethren who were in Judea heard that the gentiles had also
impatient with the slowest of others then you probably are “overdosed” with a received the word of God.
particular emotion. Examine that emotion-say feeling put upon, or feeling frustrated And when peter came to Jerusalem, those of the circumcision contended (argued) with
and ask ‘what do I expect of the world?” him saying, “You went in to uncircumcised (Gentiles) men and ate with `them.
You may begin to see that, you feel put upon because you have a lazy streak or you (Fellowshipped with them). But Peter explained it to them in order from the beginning
feel frustrated because you are counting on them too much. (vision). Since it was God who gave these gentiles the same gift as He gave us when
The next time that emotion pops up, use it as a clue that you are falling into your old we believed on the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I to argue? When they heard this, their
trap. In every case, the emotion tells you something about yourself. objections were answered and they began praising God! “Yes” they said, “God has
given to the Gentliels, too the privilege of turning to him and receiving eternal life!”
WHY SHOULD YOU ENCOURAGE A RICH EMOTIONAL LIFE IN OTHERS? NB: since God has no partiality, neither you staying without marrying or being
Give people’s emotions the respect that you give your own. As important as married is neither an issue, nor being a polygamous or being married is an issue, but
encouraging your own emotional life is showing ready acceptance when other people whoever Fears Him in every nation and works righteousness –does good deeds is
talk about how they feel. accepted by Him. What I am eager for is that all the Christians will be filled with
As soon as you criticise a friend for liking a certain person or being sexually attracted LOVE that comes from pure hearts, and that their minds will be clean and their faith
to someone, soon as you criticise him for being angry at something that seems strong. Read I Tim 1:5-11
insignificant to you, you create distance from that friend. Your friend may not How thankful I am to Christ Jesus our Lord for choosing me as one though I used to
recognise your effect on him, but he or she will confide in you less, saving truly scoff at the name of Christ, but God had mercy on me because I didn’t know what I
intimate disclosures for people who accept him as he is. If you want people to like you was doing.
and feel close to you, don’t censor their expressions of feelings. We’ve all had Mat. 7: 1-3 don’t criticise - Judge not that you be judged. Rom 2: 1-4, I Corinth 4:5
‘friends’ who don’t get angry along with us when we have been hurt or mistreated by James. 4:11; Lk 6: 37, 38, 41, 42 ; Matt 5: 13-16 be light and salt of the world.
someone. This kind of ‘friend’ may instantly try to shut us down when we seem
angry, as by implying that we are immature or juvenile or cruel. The person does this
because our anger frightens him. Our seeming loss of any kind wills interfere with
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5. A Christian and his Conscience. Rom. 14: 1-10
SUPERIORITY OF LOVE AND ITS POWER OF SHARING EVERTHING. 6. Wife and husband relationships
7. Child and Parents relationships
 There are three things that remain; Faith, Hope, and Love. 8. Social relationships and solving conflicts.
 But the Greatest is love 9. Sexual Virtues
 1 Corinth 13;13 10. True marriage and its duties
11. Advised Widows
Superiority of love: 12. Christian Freedom
 1Corinth 13: 1-12. 13. Advised Ministers of the word to work as co-workers, not as
 Roman 13:10 Love does No wrong to anyone. That is why it fully satisfies Competitors, 1Corinth. 4: 1-5
all of God’s requirements. It is the only Law you need. LK 11:41- Purity is Best demonstrated in generosity (LB)
 1 Corinth 13: 4-5 (KJV) – But rather give alms of such things as you have; then indeed all things are
clean to you.
 Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, neverboastful or Other Ministers and I should be looked upon as Christ’s Servants who distributes
proud, never haughty or SELFISH, or rude. God’s Blessings by; explaining God’s Secretes.
 Love does not demand its own way. It’s not irritable or Touchy. It does not Now the Most important thing about a servant is that He does just what his Master tells
hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it WRONG. him to
Phil: 2: 3-4 What about me? Have I been a good servant? Well I don’t Worry over what you
 Don’t’ be Selfish; don’t live to make a good impression on others. Be think I don’t even trust my own judgement on this point.
humble, thinking of others as better than your own Affairs, but be interested My conscience is clear, but even that isn’t final proof.
in others too and in what they are doing. It is the Lord himself who must examine me and decide.
 So be careful not to jump to conclusions before the Lord returns as to whether each
Phil 4:8 one of us is reallly like, deep down in our hearts. Then everyone will know why we
 And now, brethrens, as a I close this letter, let me say this one thing; Fix your have been doing the Lord’s work.
thought on what is true and good and right. Think about things that are pure At that Time God will give to each one whatever Praise is going to him
and lovely, and dwell on the fine, GOOD THINGS IN OTHERS. Consider having a little heaven on earth.
 Reefer: Rom. 12: 10,16
 Sharing everything IN WHICH WAYS CAN YOU SHOW LOVE TOYOUR MATE?
 Caring by Sharing You know that you have IQ (intelligence quotient), but did you realize that (bear with
Acts: 4: 32-35 me for the sake of the argument) each husband and wife has an “LQ” (love quotient)?
All Believers were of one Heart and of One Mind, and No one FELT that what he God commands married couples to love one another and to increase their LQ! God
owned was his own; everyone was SHAIRING everything in common. inspired the apostle Paul to instruct Husbands to love their wives. (Eph. 5:25). Paul
And the Apostles preached Powerful Sermons about the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, also taught that wives should “Love their husband” (Tit. 2:4).
and there was Warm Fellowship among All Believers, and No Poverty-for all who God created marriage to be the most joyous, love –filled relationship. Unfortunately,
owned land, or house sold them and brought the Money to the Apostles to give to many husband s and wives do not actively love one another. Their LQ is dangerously
others in NEED. loved. They endure loveless marriages of misery. God wants husbands and wives to
Many a times we think of the Ten Commandments; we forget that Paul was so much be lovers.This will solidify your marriage and place it on firm foundation. The last
concerned about real life of a complete human being. three ways deal with the pleasure phase of marriage. God wants your marriage to be
filled with real, deep joy.
1. Personal relationship Rom. 12:9-21
2. Political relationships Rom 13: 1-9
3. Public relationships Rom 13:8-14 Also reefer to Jesus’ LOVE SHARES ITSELF WITH OTHERS
4. Concern to pay Taxes. Matt. 17: 26-27
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1John 3:11-24 of your life. Give and you will have agape. You may be saying “But my mate doesn’t
For the message to us from the beginning has been that we should love one another. deserve special love.”
We are not to be like Cain who belonged to Satan and killed his brother. But agape motive is to give even an imperfect person –yes, even to an undeserving
If we love other Christians it proves that we have been delivered from hell and person. Agape is unconditional, unselfish love, does not require the other person to
given eternal life. But a person who doesn’t love others is headed for eternal death. change or be perfect. There are no conditions, no qualifications for giving of agape.
Anyone who hates his Christian Brother or sister is really a MURDERER at heart; and Jesus Christ, the perfect husband and the only human who ever perfectly expressed
you know that no one wanting to murder has eternal life within. agape, gave His life for us while we were sinners (Eph. 5: 25, Rom 5:8).
We know that REAL Love is from Christ’s example in dying for us. And so we also Christ did not require us to change first. His love was unconditional. We ought to
ought to lay down our lives for our Christian brothers and sisters. love his perfect example of love. Demands yourself to give to your mate, even when
you have been wronged. By giving inspite of your mate’s shortcomings, you will feel
LOVERS FOREVER: more positive toward your spouse. Peter expressed the principle in1 Pete 4:8 “Above
1 Conrthians: 13 – The unconditional, unselfish giving love-Agape. A wilful all things have fervent love for one another, for love will cover a multitude of sins”.
commitment to give to your imperfect mate without to get in return. Your unconditional love may cause a positive response in your mate, although this
You consciously, under all circumstances, make a lifelong commitment to never stop should never be the motive for giving.
giving to your mate. (1 Peter 3:1-2)
God is the Rock from which agape flows. He is the source of the force that will give Do not become disappointed. It is easy to become disillusioned after giving and
you the power to overcome all obstacles in your marriage. giving without any response, not even a thank-you. Agape does not require love in
Your union must begin with God. ( I John 1:3 ) God will be at the centre of your return. Love does not give in order to get. The bible teaches that if we give with
marriage, giving it strength. expectations of getting in return, our love is in vain. 1 Cor. 13:3- “And though I
God, a husband plus a wife equals one agape-filled marriage. This is the missing bestow all my goods to the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not
formula for success in so many marriages. Society presents the false and damaging love,it is all useless. When you give with love, God will fill your heart, leaving no
picture of love controlling you. You are helpless “prisoner of love,” unable to control room for disappointment. Jesus Chris taught that the joy is in the giving. “It is more
your feelings. Have you heard married people say I “cannot love him anymore-the blessed to give than to receive.
feeling is gone?” (Act 20: 35)
In truth, you choose to love or not to love. Agape is not a feeling, but a conscious and And yet at the same time you can take heart from God’s promise that if you faithfully
willful act you control. God commands us to love one another because He knows we and unselfishly give, you will eventually be rewarded.“Give and it will be given to
can control love (II John 5) Follow through on your decision to love your mate by you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over. – For with the
committing yourself to give the love that “never fails” (1 Cor. 13:8). measure that you use, it will be measured back to you”. (Luke 6: 38).
Agape is the most powerful facet of love. Agape will carry your marriage through the
COMMITMENT PRODUCES ENDUREANCE: most difficult trials.
The promise you gave in a covenant with God, on the day of marriage, to love your
mate unto death. Pray daily to God for the power to love your mate and keep that SALIVATION AND TESTIMONY:
commitment in your mind constantly. In an emergency you would not hastate to 1 Corinth 1:23. So when we preach about Christ dying to save them, the Jews are
sacrifice your life to save your mate. Are you willing to sacrifice your life daily by offended and the Gentiles say its all nonsense. (Vse 24) But God has opened the eyes
pushing aside your own needs and wants to satisfy those of your mate? Are you of those called to salvation. Rom. 10:8-10. For salvation comes from trusting Christ –
willing to put your mate’s needs a head of your own. When you are tired, do you get if you confess by your month that Jesus Christ is your Lord, and believe in your heart
up and serve instead of waiting to be served? that God raised him from the dead so that you will be saved. John. 3:3 unless you’re
(Phil. 2:3-4) born again you’ll never enter the kingdom of heaven. We are saved by Grace through
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let Faith not works. Pg 61 Acts 1:8 you will receive power to testify about me. Rev.
each esteems others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his won 12:11 – They defeated devil by their testimony.
interest, but also for the interest of others”. STRIVE to reach the state where fulfilling NB: baptism is by immersion in much water.
your mate’s needs becomes, next to your commitment to God, the predominant need HOLY SPIRIT

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Jn 3:5 unless one is born of water and the spirit, he can not enter the Kingdom of God. Seek total identification with your husband or wife-immerse yourself in your mate’s
Jn 14:17 If you love me, obey me and I will ask the father and he will give you joiners, feel your mate’s hurts, experience his other fruitions, Sing your mates’ joys.
another comforter – Holy Spirit to lead you into all truth. It is important and a must
that you be Baptized in the Holy Spirit. CLEAVE TO EACH OTHER
Read more on Holy Spirit topics in:- The bible encourages us to bear, take upon ourselves one another’s burdens. (Gal 6:2).
1 Corinth 14:2; 4 -11; 2:14; Jn 15: 26; 16:7, 3; Gal 5:5, 22; mark 3:11; John 14: 26; You will become an emotional refuge for your mate- hiding place where your mate
I Corth 12: 28; 13:1 can find warmth and shelter from the storms of life. Both of you will have a home in
2 Corinth 1:22; Eph 1: 13; 4:30; Acts 2:3; I Corinth 6: 19 ; Rm 8:26-27 each there’s hearts. Your mate will have a place o belong, and the love of belonging
Intercession: Rm 8:26-27 Jesus, Holy Spirit and and other saints who are alive pray for will bring you closer together. In Hebrew verb “cleave” is called dabaq, which will
us. Dead people can’t pray for you. (Neither can you pray for them). mean –to solder or to weld to either. (Gen 2:24) Agape and the love of belonging are
the two legs upon which your marriage stands. They are the foundations upon which
LOVERS BELONG TO EACH OTHER: the next three loves are built use these two to increase your LQ and make your
The love of belonging is the second way to love your mate; it will bring you and your marriage unshakeable. These others could be the pleasure phase.
mate closer together. This love will add another point to your LQ (Love Quotient) and
enrich your marriage. LOVE CHERISH EACH OTHER:
God created marriage to be the closest human relationship. Yet, many married couples Phileo the Greek word describes the love of cherishing. This is used to designate
live together as strangers. A cold curtain of loneliness divides them as they go their brotherly love, affecting, fondness, and cherishing (Roma 12: 10) to cherish means
separate ways. value highly, to hold in high esteem physically. Your mate should be the most valuable
What about your marriage? Do you live under the same roof, but as strangers to one person in your life and spiritually, the most valuable after God. You treat things of
another? God did not intend husbands and wives to live together like total strangers. value with lots of attention and tender, loving care. You receive love as you give love.
God did not intend husbands and wives to live together like total strangers. He has a (Rom. 12: 10; Song of Sol. 4:10, 8:1). Cherishing is sharing. How much sharing do
solution to your problem. The love of belonging is characterized by a bond of unity; you do with your mate? Do you share more with friends than with your own wife or
companionship and loyal devotion.The love of belonging shines brightness in older husband? Your whole life should be shared together in a pleasurable way. Sharing is
couples. They act alike and think alike. They have become one. But it doesn’t mean doing things together. Invite your mate to share your hobby. Together refinish old
that the love of belonging is just for older couples only. It is for all couples. God furniture, collect stamps, exercise or pursue any enjoyable hobbies and projects. The
created man with the need to belong. God looked at all He had made and saw that “it main objective is that you have fun while sharing together. Sharing is communicating
was very good” (Gen 1:31) But when God looked at Adam He saw something that was with your mate. Wives often complain “my husband doesn’t talk to me!” While
not good. “And the Lord God said it is not good that hetman should be alone; I will husbands lament” All she does is nag!” Such statements are indicators that neither
make him a helper” (Gen 2:1). partner communicates effectively. Effective communication does not start with either
This need to belong cannot be satisfied through any other person, whether mother, and listening or speaking.
father, sister or brother –only through your mate. Therefore a man shall leave his Surprised? True communication, like true love, starts with giving –outgoing concern.
father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (verse Seek to understand what your mate wants to share rather than to “get “your mate to
24). As with agape, you can only give the love of belonging to your mate. Accept understand you.This approach to communication will open many new opportunities
your mate the way your mate is not he way you would like him or other to be. Your for sharing. Cherishing is to touch. How often during the day do you touch your
mate will not feel he or she belongs as long as he or she senses you are not satisfied mate? Only at bed time? Could you and your husband or wife be called the
with him or here. Make a list of all the good things. Emphasise the positive things “untouchable?”
about your mate. Think back to the time when you were engaged and of all the If in this case, your marriage is missing a great deal of joy. Couples often touch too
qualities you admired. You might be surprised to find those same qualities in your much when they date, but appear to be handcuffed after they marry. Lovers love to
spouse today. Constantly think of these good qualities. Look to fine admirable touch to send the message “I love you.” It tells your mate, “you are important to me”.
qualities. The love of belonging is making your; mate feel accepted. Learn to I cherish you. “The lack of touching conveys the exact opposite meaning. Reach out
emphasize with your mate. and touch your mate. Weave touching into the daily fabric of your life. Give your
Push out your concerns and concentrate on the concerns of your mate. mate a warm hug in the morning. Sit close together at home or in the car. Reach over
and lovingly hold hands. Think about times you can touch your mate; then touch your
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mate with pleasure. In marriage the loving touch turns everything to love. Give your evening our marriages. Take your marriage out of their age by giving warm affection
mate a touch and you will give phileo the love of cherishing. to your mate.
Kissing has always been a symbol of affection and warmth. You should make kissing
LOVERS ARE ROMANTIC: the official form of greeting your mate. A kiss in the morning is a pleasant way to
Eros is a Greek word describing romantic love. Eros –Romance – is Real. It is not start the day. Kisses throughout the day are an excellent way to sustain your mate’s
only found in a Hollywood production. God inspired the Bible, the Song of Solomon, affection. (Song of Sol. 1:2) Solomon’s bride desired his kisses, “Let him kiss me
to describe the proper kind of romantic love in marriage. The Bible also describes the with the kisses of his mouth –for your love is better than wine”. As the wine makes
love Jacob had for Rachel, which caused him to serve for seven years, and they the heart merry, so do kisses of romantic love. Little things mean a lot. Have you
seemed but a few days to him because of love he had for her. (Gen 29:20) Yes, stopped doing the little things? Now is the time start a new. Romance is all in the
Romantic love is real, and you will really need to give it to your mate. On many cases, mind! The imaginings of your mind can be a powerful tool in becoming more
wives have little trouble understanding Eros. Quite often they are starving for romantic toward your mate. Solomon said we are what we think. (Prov. 23:7) Jesus
romance. Husbands tend to ignore romance, and do not fulfil their wives’ needs. Christ, of course, spoke of the sinful effects on the mind that lusting after a person who
Wives desire romance. Romance must come before sex. is not your mate will have (Matt. 5:28). But have you ever thought about the other
God wants you to give the pleasure of romantic love to your mate. Are you a fighter side of this scripture?
or a lover? If you have not been giving romantic love, you probably have been Usually for every good there is evil, and for every evil there is good. It is obviously
fighting. This is the time to become a lover, not fighter. And now is the time. wrong to have lustful thoughts about someone else’s mate, but it is good to have
thoughts of desire towards your own mate. God told Eve that here “desire” would be
ROMANTIC LOVE toward her husband, and the same applied to Adam (Gen 3; 16) Solomon instructs us
There are a number of important keys to developing romantic love; imagination, to use our minds in this way “Drink from your own cistern, and running ware from
climate and surrender. your own enraptured with her love” (Prov. 5; 15- 19) Even when your mate is out of
The climate in which romance is given is important. Eros is emotional and sensitive sight, never let him or her be out of your mind. Use your heart and your imaginations
and requires a warm climate to flourish. Project a warm, positive attitude toward your to create positive, pleasing thoughts about your mate (Phil 4:8). Think about your
mate. Ask God to help you remove any negative feelings you may have had in the mate’s attractive qualities. Hear his or her warm and reassuring voice. Take mental
past (Eph. 4:31-32). You are making anew beginning in your relationship. Your stock of your mate’s inner and outer beauty. Where there is no vision, the people
giving will go along way in producing a warm climate for romance. Décor, a lover’s perish. We can also say that where there is no vision, there is no romance.
grooming, is an important part of the romantic climate. Since Eros is sensitive to sight
and scent, your grooming or the lack of it can turn your mate on and off. Be clean. If Do not withhold the romantic love your mate so desperately needs from you.
you want to get next to your mate, make sure you are tidy. Wives, keep your hair neat Add another point to your LQ. Surrender and let love flow!
and pretty.
Husbands shave those whiskers. It is difficult to go cheek to cheek with a cactus. LOVERS ARE LOVERS:
Exercise neatly, even around the house. Wives, dress as a appealingly as possible for
you’re your husband’s. Husbands, dress to please your wives. Find out what your  To have and to hold your lover.
mate likes to see you in then aim to please her. The “nice Look of a Lover” produces a
romantic climate. Solomon spoke of the power of romantic eye contact when he MARITAL SEX AT ITS BEST
wrote, “You have made my heart beat faster with a single glance of your eyes” (Song
of Sol. 4:9) Couples who are in love look at one another often. It has been said, “The  Love it, like it, delight in it!
eye is the mirror of the soul. “It is also true that the eye is the mirror of love. Create a
romantic climate with your mate through eye contact. Look warmly into your mate’s  Nothing remains static in any relationship!
eye when you talk. In public situations, occasionally look for your mate, catch his or Good sex is all about free expression of the joys it give s us. The fifth way to love
her eye and smile or wink. your mate is with sexual love. How is your love life? God intended it to be
You will be sending the message “I love you “from your eyes to your mate’s heart. pleasurable. You and your mate have the capacity of reaching that high level of sexual
Nothing warms the romantic climate like the giving of affection. Our generation has enjoyment. Even if your sex life has been unfulfilling, you can change it for he better.
been stripped of its “Natural affection “(II Tim 3:3) we have become cold and aloof, The place to start improving your sex life is with the application and giving of the
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other four loves. Sexual love has been placed last in this series of points because its have a fantasy, which one of them put this way; “I’d like to go for an hour-no, make it
success is dependent on the other areas. If you are to improve your sex life, first two hours or more without coming think that would feel great and my wife would love
improve the rest of your marriage. The prudish, Victorian approach to sex as being me for it”. It’s easy to understand how someone who usually can’t have intercourse
one of the necessary evils of love is wrong. To properly give sexual love to your mate, for more than a minute or two would fantasize about the effects of lasting longer.
you need God’s positive attitude toward sex. God created sex, and he says that it is But, as usual, it’s important not to get carried away. I’ve talked with men who do
good in marriage (Gene 1:27, 31). God inspired Paul to write “Marriage is have intercourse for up to an hour, and even longer, and they are not a happy group.
honourable among all and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterous God will They have the problem of not being able to come inside a woman no matter how long
judge”. (Heb 13:4). You have a God –given responsibility to give sexual love and they thrust, and their regular bouts of thirty, sixty, or so minute intercourse really don’t
satisfaction to your mate. God commands husbands and wives to satisfy one another’s feel all that great. It may seem to you that their partners would be ecstatic, but the
sexual needs;” Let the husband fulfil his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to reality is somewhat different. Their partners complain about unceasing thrusting and
her husband” (1Cor. 7:3). Your body actually belongs to your mate, and your mate’s pounding, and a sense of incompleteness because; although intercourse seems to go on
body is yours (verse 4). With that authority comes the responsibility to take care of forever the man never finishes in “a normal way”.
your mate’s body. Handle it with tender, loving care. You should never refuse to give Fortunately, this problem called, retarded ejaculation by sex therapists is far less
sexual love to your mate or use it as a weapon or for leverage (1Cor. 7:5). While common than rapid ejaculation.
ejaculation is a reflex and can’t be controlled perfectly, a man who has developed It is fortunate that rapid ejaculation is much easier to treat. Lack of ejaculatory
control can enjoy high levels of sexual arousal, whether from oral or manual control manifests itself in various ways. Some men have very little control regardless
stimulation or intercourse, without coming, and he usually has a choice when to of the sexual activity. Most without ejaculatory control do not also experience
ejaculate. He can allow his arousal to rise to a high level and then more or less level difficult –getting erections. But some men have both problems: Erections are difficult
off until he wants to come. Don’t take the levelling off too literally, however. In to get and ejaculations are usually; quick. Since many of the exercises for developing
reality, his arousal fluctuates, increasing and decreasing, according to his desires and better control require an election, men with both problems should not attempt to work
what’s going on, until he wants to come. He can also decide to come quickly if that on gaining ejaculation before erection problem is resolved. First things first. Sex
seems appropriate. In contrast, a man without control tends to go from zero therapists aren’t as knowledgeable about the causes of lack of control as we would
excitement to orgasm without levelling off. He has come quickly; he has no other like. We aren’t sure why control gets better with age and experience for many men.
choice. He doesn’t get to enjoy high levels of arousal for long. He may try various But not for others. One thing we do know, however, is that unlike erection problems,
methods of lessening his excitement to orgasm without levelling off. He has to come which are often caused or maintained by physical factors and drugs, rapid ejaculation
quickly; there are various methods of lessening his excitement ,like thinking of is almost always due to alack of knowledge, attention or skill. Another thing we know
something other than sex is a popular one, but they work neither well nor consistently. is that abstinence hampers control.
And his partner is always in a quandary. She’s fearful of stimulating him, because that It also seems to be true that anxiety can cause loss of control. This seems so in new
may bring instant ejaculation. partners but regain control as they get more comfortable.
She’s fearful of allowing herself to get turned on in intercourse, because it will In general, men without control simply don’t make the adjustments in behaviours and
probably be over before she’s derived as much enjoyment from it as she desires. IF not focusing on their own sensations and therefore can’t take appropriate action;
she has the ability to be orgasmic in intercourse, she at first will try desperately to because they don’t know when to make the adjustments in their behaviours, or because
reach orgasm before he comes, usually a futile endeavour. they don’t know what kind of adjustment should be made. The benefits of gaining
After repeated failures, she may stop getting turned on. What’s the point of getting control are many.
excited, she wonders, if the only result is to be left hanging and feeling frustrated? Better control means longer and usually more enjoyable sex, especially intercourse.
Even if she does manage to achieve orgasm in intercourse before he does, it’s a hurried Men who have achieved this feel more confidence and better about themselves as
and anxious business and doesn’t seem worth the effort. lovers, and their partners are appreciative. Also, many men report that their own
Lack of ejaculatory control isn’t a bad problem to have, because sex therapists have orgasms feel better; “Fuller or more complete,” is how they describe them. It is
been very successful in resolving it. important, however, not to confuse having better control with the woman having so-
According to a number of studies and clinical impressions, 80 to 90 percent of men called vaginal orgasms (orgasm solely through intercourse without simultaneous
learn better controlling therapy, provided they are willing to devote the necessary time clitoral stimulation). But the clear conclusion of a number of surveys is that many,
and energy. Ejaculatory control is a skill or habit that can be learned in eight to twenty probably a majority, of women are not orgasmic in this way. They require direct
weeks by following certain exercises. Many men without good ejaculatory control clitoral stimulation. It’s also important not to assume that lack of control is always a
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problem. Whether it is or not depends of the couples, and the circumstances. There something precious is missing. The missing something is the free and active
are some couples, for instance, in which the man usually comes quickly but it bothers expression of love. When a couple get married, their love needs to be renewed and
neither him nor his partner. If they’re content, they shouldn’t bothers to change. Not liberated to include the deepest physical and emotional exploration of each there’s
all men do have higher sex drives than all women. body.
There are millions of highly sexed women in the world! But men do seem to have the Sometimes a dull routine develops because either the husband or wife fears change
lion’s share of sexual drive and desire. There are many hypotheses as to why but and tries to keep the act of love static as a security measure. The couple becomes
testosterone one seems to be the main ingredient. You should know that difference in scared to try new things as they do not want to upset the status quo. When an
sexual desire and drive is controversial. Basically, you can’t tamper with nature individual does this, he or she is unwittingly choosing emptiness, not fullness in the
without having some pretty drastic side effects. Be more direct in asking for sex. prelateship. There are couples who have not yet discovered the joy of love-making
Delivery is the key to a woman’s response and will depend greatly on wether you’re just because they are scared to dig deeper to find out what is lying down there. This
being romantic and loving or terse and demanding. fear leaves them with a lifeless, emotionally barren relationship. Each couple needs to
Initiate sex out of love and desire, not out of habit. That means –make sure you’re first be free and open with each other as this provides the path to exploration and free
sincerely interested before you ask. Become an expert in arousing desire in your expression of one’s needs, wants, expectations and feelings. What keeps the
partner relationship vital and moving is a joyous pattern of mutual response, the kind that sees
Learn what she loves and how to hit the right buttons! Accept the fact that your… the two lovers go through happiness and pleasure interspersed with changes of fortune
partner…may….need….extra…stimulation. and diversities of feeling.
Don’t rush, seduce her instead. Don’t deliberately heighten your own level of desire. Nothing remains static in any relationship and a couple must learn to change and adopt
Honour your partner’s preconditions for sex. That is, ask her what’s important in with different circumstances. In every marriages there are almost perfect moments
terms of time of the day, environment, words spoken, etc., and then make sure they’re that sometimes happen between lovers and these may tempt the couple to complacency
present before you suggest having sex. So brethren what is your love quotient now? while trying to capture and repeat their favourite experiences. While good experiences
After studying these ways to love your mate, you love Quotient should be five points are pleasant to remember, clinging to the past or to history often causes couples to
higher. miss out on the new delights which are ahead. Many couples complain that their
With all the hype about sex, not enough is discussed about sex in marriage as it is partner has changed because their love-making is not what it was in the first year of
assumed that once couples get married their sex life settles down with them, this is far marriage. For example; they forget to look at what has also changed in their
from the Truth. A lot of times, sex in marriages remain unsatisfactory and unfulfilling circumstances in that one or two years, for examples, change of jobs, change of house,
mainly because the couple does not know that they can make it better. When sex in having a child or they may have simply relaxed and stopped trying to please each other
marriage only consists of a physical sensation lasting only a few seconds, it leaves and they aren’t living in the comfort of marriage.
many married people asking what a fuss of sex is all about. Yet sex in marriage The time when the love relationship is admittedly less than perfect will always leave
should be all about expressing love, liking it and delighting in it. room for movement toward each other. These are the times when the couple may be
The sexual dynamics of sex in marriage should go beyond physical techniques and going through a difficult time, or other responsibilities and children may overwhelm
look at the commitment the couple have in their marriage and the love they share. Sex them. The constant change in marriage should not make a couple fear and tend to
in marriage should not be addressed as casual sex engaged by lovers who do not have neglect their sex life when their relationship is on a low ebb. There is no fixed part for
a life commitment to each other. It is not girl friend-boy friend affair which can be each partner in the relationship to play within the sexual experience.
terminated at any time. Since being married means a commitment to each other, a For example, there cannot be one person who is charged with the responsibility of
married couple should explore the unlimited possibilities of enjoying their sexual initiating sex. Well in deed some men would be uncomfortable with a woman who
relationship in the most loving manner. The dynamics of the sexual relationship initiates sex or has her own sexual demands as they are brought up to believe that good
between a husband and wife are different in every marriage as the individuals girls don’t show their sexual emotions. Many couples interpret the Bible teaching that
involved, but there are generally areas that the couples can learn from experience of a wife is to be submissive to her husband to mean that in the sexual relationship she
others and from expert views. The first thing is that the sexual relationship in marriage should be limited to awaiting the man’s pleasure and is supposed to remain passive
is meant to be full of life, rich in emotion and changing within the security of the in…the….whole…act.
marriage commitment Couples who approach sex as equal partners find the greatest pleasure in the act as
When love-making takes on a tiresome sameness of routine, both partners feel a vague they have no equal about who does what as long as both enjoy it. Good sex is all
sense of dissatisfaction with unnamed longings, even though they do not realise that about free expression of the joys it gives us and if our way of expressing our
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feelings is through tears of joy, screaming or laughter, and then we should not Let us stop being Hypocritical and face the facts of real life.
inhibit ourselves. We should allow ourselves to get lost in our own feelings. A That is the truth and nothing but the truth (John 8:32-36).
woman may sometimes need the knowledge of her husband’s needs to be, while the
woman is given room to seek what she needs. She should be allowed to express her GOD’S CALLING PLAN
sexual needs and even become actively involved in ensuring her needs are met. You So what exactly is “a call to ministry?”
will come to discover that good sex is not just a fantasy, but also something within The concept of a call is one of the most profound of all biblical ideas. The Bible is
your reach and something you can too enjoy. riddled with stories about calls to men and women who, when summoned to serve,
Part of the delight of the marriage relationship is that opportunities in the privacy of went out and marked their generation in a particular way. Such calls had several
your bedroom where you can be all you want to be. You can be most totally your true commonalties. First, in one way or another, they all originated out of the God head.
self with your partner in your bedroom. In your bedroom you can laugh, crack jokes God the Father called Abraham, Moses, Isaiah, and Amos (to name a few) Jesus called
and even be naught without wanting to keep the image. Sex with your partner is far twelve men” to be with him”, and then sent them out to disciple the nations. The Holy
more than recreation. It is one of the recreations as well. It is called “Love- Spirit called Saul and Barnabas and others to apostolic opportunity. No one in the
making”, or “Love Play”, because it is the best, the most relaxing and renewing Bible anointed himself or herself.
recreation known to man. It should be fun, not duty; high excitement, not boredom; Secondly, Bible calls were quite unpredictable. Gideon, for example, responded to his
something to anticipate, not a dreary experience. Find forgetfulness from the care and call, “How can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in
the insults of life, and to experience the total and wonderful relaxation elsewhere, my family”. Why David? Why Jeremiah? Why Simon Peter? Why Jonah? And, of
never having discovered the fullness of pleasure available to them in their own all people, why Saul of Tarsus who recollects, “I was a blasphemer and a prosecutor,
bedroom. Don’t go for massaging elsewhere; let it be done to you by the one most and a violent man? When Apostle Francis was asked why God called him, he said,”
special person, your partner in your bedroom. You should not use each other as God picks the weakest, the smallest, the meanest of men on the face of the earth, and
mechanisms which can be used for satisfaction and discarded at will, but as treasures he uses them”.
of great and lasting value. As one realise how infinitely their partner appreciates them Thirdly, Biblical calls usually focus on mind-boggling, seemingly impossible
during love-making, they develop the assurance of their own self-worth. objectives. Build a boat Noah; lead a nation out of Egypt, Moses; face down a wicked
This caring and responsibility during love-making will extend outward to the other King, Elijah; Preach to the Gentiles Paul; and now restore Biblical polygamous
marital details and responsibilities like paying bills, taking care of the children, marriages and other marital status in families, Francis. But the call was so compelling
keeping the house, and looking after each other all the time. that it gave courage to the one called.
When love in a partner crumbles, the rest of the relationship follows. Disagreements, Finally, each Biblical call was unique. No call seems like any other. The
quarrels, and fight become the order of the day. Finally unspoken discontent circumstances, the nature, the expectations of the call; all customized.
overshadows the good aspects of their relationship. The oneness of the sexual When God wanted a word said or a people led, He mandated a person to make it
relationship is often mysterious. It brings two separate individuals who become happen in an unprecedented way. All calls were not classified ad so that anyone could
merged into one through a physical act. volunteer. Persons, sometimes-strange persons, were selected. While others,
The human sexual union leaps the walls of separation and loneliness, fuses our seemingly more worthy and capable were not. There was only one Esther, one John
partialities and contrariness into wholeness, and joins the fragments of life into anew the Baptizer. There was only one Moses in spite of what Miriam and Aaron dared to
unifying identity. think the day they asked, “Hasn’t He spoken to US?”
If you are married, discover the hidden joy of love play. Share it with your partner. These not-so –novel observations are worthy repeating for they form a foundation for
You know what? it is as easy as wanting to do it and doing it. Try it. Come on. Make authoritative Ministry. If we have lost our Faith in the Idea that such calls continue
it happen. Make it REAL. Different SEX Styles are very important and mandatory to today, then perhaps we have lost touch with the supernatural element that ministry
break the monotony and boredom. Sex is an ART perform it. In bed, or Table, desperately needs. The Key questions are simple: Does God still calls men and
Standing, in bathroom, be crazy and enjoy it for you have only one life to live. women as he once did? And do we know-how to recognize and implement a call if it
NB: My final appeal is this- Jeremiah 4:1-2 should come?
If you will return to me and absolutely discard your idols, and if you swear by me Be very careful, you dare never say no to God. Should you choose to-do anything else
alone, the living God, and begin to LIVE, GOOD, HONEST, CLEAN, LIVES then but what God calls you to do, you’ll be a sad person all of your life. I am a victim and
you will be a testimony to the nations of the world and they will come to me and God called me to serve Him but I wanted to run away like Jonah. Had many excuses
glorify my name. like Moses and Gideon, nearly landed into death several times but God snatched me
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out of the brink of death and asked me, “Did you really think you could get away from Ref: Deut 10:19 Matt 19:19; 25:35 Lk 6:31; Matt 7:12 Rom 12:10 Gal 5:13; 1Thess
your call that easily?” 4:9 I Corinth 13:13 Acts 4:32 -34; 2:4-44; Rom 12: 13 Lk 6: 38; Rom 12:9 -21; I John
My mini-rebellion quashed, I submitted to what seemed to be inevitable. I was 3:16-19; 2 Tim 3:1-5
destined to serve God. Briefly this is my call story. Every called person has one. A Rom 12:13 – When God’s children are in Need, you be the one to help them out. I
call story is a history of “Whispered words and events” that capture the soul and make Thess 4:9-10 - concerning brotherly love – we beg you to love them more and more.
you aware that God is speaking. For some of us the call story is dramatic. In one I John 3:16-19 – We know what real love is from Christ’s example in dying for us.
forceful moment you gain a sense of conviction that God has spoken and directed; you And so we also ought to lay down our lives for our Christian brothers.
are never again the same after this. For others like myself the call is a cointinual I John 3:17- But if someone who is supposed to be a Christian has money enough to
dripping, it beats on you until you capitulate, “Okay- Okay.” Once you are called, live well, and sees a brother in need and won’t help him- how can God’s love be
financial security, location, notoriety, applause, and power become increasingly less within him? Vse 18-19- Little children, let us stop just saying we love people; let us
important. Obedience becomes the primary issue. Let others feel free to build really love them by Actions then we will know for sure, by our actions we are on
fortunes; the call binds you to surrender yourself to the Will of God. I fear this sounds God’s side, and our consciences will be clear, even when we stand before the Lord.
overly pious, but it’s been the perspective of called people for centuries. Christ will Rom. 12:9 -10 don’t just pretend that you love others; really love them. Hate what is
build His church when the pastor concentrates on meeting the needs of the people.The wrong, stand on the side of God, love each other with brotherly affection and take
name Francis means free and frank. Maybe that is hy God predestined Apostle Francis delight in honouring each other.
to elaborate Christian polygamy and this other issues freely and frankly. 2 Tim 3:1-5 you may as well know this, that in the last days it is going to be very
difficult to be a Christian. For people will love only themselves and their money; they
SHARING EVERYTHING (LOVE BY ACTION) will be proud and boastful, sneering at God, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, never
give in to others, constant liars, cruel, trouble makers, will think nothing of
THE STATE OF ONE WHO IS SAVED AND LOVES THE LORD: immorality. They prefer good times to worshiping God. They will go to church, yes,
John 13:35 - Your strong love for each other will prove to the world that you are but they won’t really believe anything they hear. Don’t be taken in by people like
my disciples. that.
John 13:34 A new A new commandment I give you – Love each other as I love you. Luke 11:41 Purity is best demonstrated in generosity.
Why there is so much evil everywhere, there is No Pure Love on earth. God says Love
your neighbour as yourself.
Those who have don’t share with those who don’t have. The gap between the Rich DAY OF REST (SABBATH DAY)
and the poor is so big. Even church ministers i.e. the pastors, bishops and other church
officials can mean to be selfish.  Sabbath is not Saturday, Sunday or Friday.
Some of their church members go without food and other basic needs but who cares?  A Sabbath day means a day of Rest and Worshiping God.
Why is there so much evil on earth? Much stealing, robbery with violence,  Anyday you choose to rest and worship the lord God of Israel, Abraham,
unfaithfulness, prostitution etc. Isaac and Jacob that is your Sabbath day. The Jews chose to worship on
Saturday as their Sabbath day. We who were Gentiles and are now saved by
People keep asking this one question; “is there a God who really cares?” If there is, the Grace of God need not follow the Jewish customs and days of worship.
does he really care? Why is there so much suffering? Listen my dear friend. Gen. 2:1-4- So God blessed the Seventh day and rested. God did not name days;
We must start to demonstrate love. If people really loved others and shared Monday, Saturday, and Sunday etc as a holy day.
everything will the devil have a chance to lead people to rob, steal kill and do Six days a week are for your daily duties and regular work, but on the Seventh Day is
prostitution etc? a day of Sabbath, rest before the Lord you God.
You don’t love God, and you are not saved until you really love your Neighbour Exd: 5:12; Lev 26:2 ; Deut 35:2 = and now are you going correct God by burdening
indeed. You will never know God and love Him until you know and love your gentiles with a yoke that neither we, nor our fathers were able to bear?
Neighbour indeed. Sermons will never be powerful and miracles will never happen Acts: 15:19 - And so my judgement is that we should not insist that the Gentiles who
until believers are of one heart, and mind and No one feels that what he owned wasn’t turn to God must obey our Jewish laws- Acts 15:27-29
of his own and starts sharing that No one feels poor or needy. It seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us to lay no greater burden of Jewish laws on
you. Rom. 14:5-12 some think that Christians should observe the Jewish holidays as
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special days to worship God, but others say it is wrong and foolish to go to all that Such were Moses and David.I think that a great leader is drafted by the Holy spirit for
trouble for everyday alike belongs to God. On questions of this kind everyone must the TASK, and commissioned by the Lord of the church to fill a position he had little
decide for himself. If you have special days for worshiping the Lord, you are trying to heart for. The man who is ambitious to lead is disqualified as leader.
honour Him; you are doing a good thing. The true leader will have no desire to lord it over God`s heritage.But will be humble,
Ref: Rom 14; 1-4 Gal 4:10-14 those who depend on Jewish laws to save them are self sacrificing and altogether the spirit makes it clear that a wiser and more gifted man
under God’s curse, for the scriptures point out very clearly “Cursed is everyone who is than himself has appeared.
under the law. John 4:21-24. Jesus replied “The hour is coming and now is, when we NB
will no longer be concerned about whether to worship God the father here on this This is the Will of God for me.
Mountain, or in Jerusalem. But the hour is coming, and now is the time, when the I did not choose it.I sought to escape.But it has come.
True Worshipers will worship God the Father in spirit and Truth; for the Father is Something else has come too.A sense of certainty that God does not want me only
seeking such to worship Him. God is spirit and those who worship Him must worship for a preacher.He wants me also for a leader.
in spirit and Truth. I feel a commissioning to work under God for the revival of His church-careless of my
NB: Therefore, now it is not where and which day you worship Him but how you own reputation; indifferent to the comments of older and jealous men.
worship Him that matters. Just worship him in spirit and Truth. If I am to serve God in this way, I must no longer shrink from the task but do it.
Love is sum Total of God’s commandments; love your neighbour as yourself. I have examined my heart for ambition. I am certain it is not there.
John 8:32 and you shall know the Truth and the Truth will set you free.John 8:36 So if I hate the criticism I shall evoke and the painful chatter of people. Obscurity, quiet
the Son of God sets you FREE, you shall be FREE indeed. Jesus is the way, Truth and browsing amoung books, and the service of simple people is my taste-but by the
life, No one comes to the father but by Him. John 14:6. WILL of God, this is my task.Oh GOD help me.
Bewildered and unbeliving, I hear the voice of GOD say to me; “I want to sound the
Read more on; the Law & its role, bondage of legalism; consequence of legalism. note through you.” Oh GOD, did ever an Apostle shrink from his task more? I dare
Effects of Christian freedom; counsels and cautions – Gal 3:19-29; 4:5 6:1-16 not say “No” but, like Jonah, I would vain run away.
NB? See what Paul was like when he followed Jewish religion “Why thee? Why thee?” somebody repeated it again and again as if to mock me.
Gal 1:10-17 “What are you saying?” Cried Francis at last.
“I am, saying that everybody follows you and listen to you, everyone desires to see
As a leader: you and obey you and yet for all that thou art neither handsome ,nor learned,nor of
noble family.Whence comes it that it should be thee whom the world desires to
Defination: Leadership is influence. follow?”
The ability of one person to influence others. When Francis Motari heard these words, he was filled with joy, raised his eyes to
Leadership is the capacity and Will to rally men and women to a heaven and after remainning along time absorbed in contemplation,knelt praising and
Common Purpose and the character, which inspires confidence. Blessing God with Extraordinary Favour. Then I turned to somebody and said,”thou
A leader is a person who has a bility to get others to do what they don’t want to do, wishest to know?”
and like it. It is because the eyes of the most High has willed it so.
In the world there are only three kinds of people; those that are movable,those that are He continually watches the good and the wicked, and as His most
immovable,and those that move them. Holy eyes have not found amoung sinners any smaller man,Nor any more sufficient
The person most likely to be a successful leader is one who leads not by merely and sinful,therefore he has chosen me to accoplish the marvelous work which God has
pointing the way but by having trodden it himself. We are leaders to the extent that we undertaken.He choose me because, he could find none more worthless and wished to
inspire others to follow us. cofound the nobility and grandeur, the strength,the beauty and the learning of this
The best test of wether one is a qualified leader is to find out wether anyone is world.
following him. I have in mind the use of the word leadership which our Lord doubtless had in mind
NB. A true and safe leader is likely to be one who has no desire to lead, but is when he said,”He who would be greatest amoung you shall be the servant of all.
forced into a position of leadership by the inward pressure of the Holy Spirit and the Leadership in the sense of rendering the maximum of service; in the sense of
press of the external situation. unwearying and unceasing absorption in the greatest work of the world, the
building up of the kingdom of the Lord Jesus christ
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MEN OFTEN GO ASTRAY. Education is good but pride can close the heart to the word of God. If
that happens, man is only an educated fool. A mind that is merely clever
Even in the best-laid schemes men often go astray. does not always perceive real truth.
Life is no straight and an easy corridor, along which we travel free and Simply most Bible writers did not have a college education in theology
unhampered, but a maze of passages through which we must seek our or otherwise. Why must we then have it to understand what was written
way, lost and confused now and again checked in a blind alley. in the Bible?
But always, if we have faith, God will open a door for us not perhaps Matthew 11:25, 26- Jesus said, “I thank thee O Father, Lord because
one that we ourselves would ever have thought of but one that will thou hast hid these things from the wise and prudent and revealed them
ultimately prove good for us. unto babies. But God makes known his secrets by means of his spirit.
Let us look at these four characters, Sniff, Scurry, Hem, and Haw who So we do not speak in words taught by wisdom but in words taught by
are intended to represent the simple and the complex parts of ourselves spirit of God, as we explain spiritual truths to those who have the spirit.
regardless of our age gender, race or nationality. 1 Corinthians 2:2-8, 12, 13
Sometimes we may act like sniff, who Sniffs out change early or Scurry, Let the Bible be your long life friend
who scurries into action or Hem, who denies and resists change as he
fears it will lead to something worse or Haw, who learns to adapt in “YEARNING TO TRANSFORM !!!”
times when he sees changing leads to something better. The experience is breathtaking and heatrbreaking.Trying to move
Whatever parts of us we choose to use, we all share something in forward but many hands pulling you many steps backwards and trying
common, a need to find our way in a maze and succeed in changing to discard you into a dustbin. Practically and traditional chemically
times. thwarted. After they have done this, they never hesitate to quote this,”
A maze is where you look for what you want- church, organization you His projects never succed.”Only Jesus is the judge.
work in, the family or community you live in. Hence you need a People will have to make the necessary investments today in children, and educational
metaphor for what you want to have in your life- whether it is good job, systems to keep pace with the rapidly changing world and prepare them for future
a loving relationship, a possession, Money, spiritual peace of mind or challenging opportunities.
health. It is very regrettable that we lose visionary and companionate individuals so
For this course you need to anticipate change, adapt change quickly earlydue to Strive, envy, and hatred which leads to witchcraft and witchhunting
again and again. leading to premature deaths; hence we are left lagging behind in all aspects.Because
people live in fear and fear to do any progress least they lose their lives.
Be sure to discover the secret for yourself and learn how to deal with
change so that you suffer less stress and enjoy more success in your We need to make a movement and make it a habit not to look at people through
the prism of tribe, race, clan, village, colour, religion and language.
church, work and in your life. Even this will end.
When you move beyond fear you feel free. we should see people as human beings and dish out opportunities that come out our
Acts 17:11- Search the scripture daily whether these things be so. ways to the best qualified and the most deserving without a thought about
ethinicity.Always a pioneer of transformation movement pass through a firely furnace.
Must one go to college to understand the Bible? No !!
Mattew 11:25-26 I’m sure that here I speak for many human beings. For it is only by pioneering
1 Corinthians 2:6-8,12,13 educational paths to other parts of our country and other countries that we may become
real citizens of the world.
These included my predilection for system and method in everything I turned my
hands to ;my exceptional performance of any task I am assigned;
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my hatred of indiscipline and loose language; my insistence on the highest Other people are so judgemental.So if you spend a lot of time with these types -can
qualification of character for everybody who seeks to work beside me; my blindness to easily convert you into a judgmental person as well. Don’t you forget downers –a
tribe ,race,colour,religion when choosing aides and beneficiaries. people who can‘t appreciate the positive in life. If you tell them how something is
beautiful, they will show you how ugly it is. They take the joy out of everything. Their
I must ask:” whence cometh such one to save us from wickedness, idleness and total
negativity consumes you before you know it, and you start looking at things with
absence of purpose of our lives that moor (attach) us so completely to the ground and
coloured glasses. There are others so insincere. These are those who shallow
threaten to consign our lives to the grave and eternal hell?”
meaningless relationships. Whenever you are really in need of a friend, they won‘t be
My vision is to empower people to participate in development of wherever we are, there. When you need support they would rather see you fail or make a fool of
nation,church,workplace,or any institution and entire world through education and self yourself. And instead of constructive criticism, they would rather tell you that you are
determination. My mission is to actively shape the future through the gift of education great the way you are.
and empowerment of others to become leaders and role models who inspire new
Disrespectful people will say or do things at the most inappropriate times and in the
generations. I see education as the key to equalizing the gap between ourselves in the
most inappropriate ways.
rural areas, urban areas in Kenya ,Africa and the west .I think and believe that with a
world class education ,we should be able to compete on the global job market, and by In essence, they are more subtle –noticeable, grown up bullies. Maybe this is a person
so doing ,raise the ability of our rural areas,urban,and country as a whole to compete who is a friend who you confided in and uses your secret against you.
globally.
Or maybe it could be a family member who puts his busy –bodied nose into your
The problems with us is that we often do not utilize the great talent we have and our affairs when it is none of his bussiness. Sometimes it maybe a colleague who says
graduate end up frustrated and immotivated on the other side. I also believe there is a demeaning things to you. Things that do not give you the respect that you should
certain elitism among our graduates, many of whom believe that attaining a university have ,or deserve. Such people don‘t have a sense of boundaries and don‘t respect your
education makes them too good to take on certain jobs. Certain pragmatism is required feelings or for that matter, your privacy.
in an environment where jobs are so scarce.
They are the kind that will cause you to feel frustrated and dis-respected. To these
Graduates have to be willing to start low and work their way to the top, which if they individuals, you can never give enough to make them happy. They take you for
are talented, they will certainly be able to do. granted and have unrealistic expectations of you. They will find ways to continually
fault you and never take responsibility for anything themselves.
Graduates should also consider volunteering in order to gain valuable job market.
A people like these are so toxic in that you will spend so much time trying to please
“I intend to communicate this vision as widely as possible, consult widely but
them that you will end up losing yourself in the process.
most importantly, I walk the talk”
All these personalities have several things in common; the more they get away with
“Unfortunately we have dream killers” their behaviours, the more they will continue.
You will spend so much time to please them that you will end up losing yourself in the Unfortunately, most of them don’t see that what they do is wrong and as a result,
process. Stay focused on your vision and mission. talking to them about it will fall on deaf ears, leaving you wondering if you are the
Every time you have an idea these people tell you why you can‘t do it. As you achieve, crazy ones and most of them get worse with age making their impact on you stronger
they try to pull you down. As you dream, they are the first to tell you it is impossible. with time. But remember,” EVEN THIS WILL END,”

These people are stuck in what is, instead of what could be. There are people who have Frankly, life is too short to spend your time dealing with toxic people. If you can,
an extreme sense of self importance and believe that the world revolve around them. avoid spending so much time with people who are indicative of these behaviours and
They are so manipulative but instead, they tend to be abit open about getting their you will feel a lot happier. I know for sure that you have encountered such
needs met. They are solely focused on their needs leaving your needs in the dust. You personalities, “haven`t you?” What did you do? “Spot them and avoid them”
are left disappointed and unfulfilled. If you lack wisdom ask God to give you freely, for wisdom can never be acquired
They zap you (hit you suddenly with force) by getting you focus so much on them that from school or any institution of higher learning.
you have nothing left for yourself. May God’s grace be sufficient in your life my friend.
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LOVE IS SUPREME IN ALITTLE HEAVEN ON EARTH

Christian life can be the source of greatest happiness or greatest heartache. The
difference depends a great deal on pure love devoid of hypocrisy. You can find every
answer in a relationship with Jesus. This book shows how you can experience His Joy
and Guidance and offers help in the calm assurance that God is in Ultimate control and
very much interested in your life. God made man perfectly holy and happy. And
satisfies the desires of every living BEING.{MAN}. Psm 145:15-16. Just think of
having a little Heaven in your Church and in your Home. This is God’s desire for
us all. This Book shares Spiritual insights and Biblical principles revealed to the
Apostle. God means that he wants all his children to live in peace. Paul took his time
to give advice to each group in any situation in the family, physically, socially,
Economically, and politically.
Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the Faith
giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons: - Forbiding to marry and
commanding people to abstain from foods which God created to be received with
thanksgiving by those who believe and know the Truth. 1 Tim 4:1-3
For this purpose God appointed Apostle Francis to bring to light what is practised
behind the scenes. Real life experience expounded in this book touching every corner
of our lives from all angles openly.
Go through and the Truth will set you FREE.

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