Collecting proof of conspiracy, one foreclosure at a time - the FAAC May Day News Special Edition

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“Mr. Gobachov, break

FAAC Special May 1st down these walls.”

Ronald Reagan

Communist Edition
WHAT CAN WE DO FOR AN
ENCORE AFTER APRIL 1ST?

A QUESTION AS APRIL 1, EDITION WENT TO PRINT

Greg Ozimek and I hatched the April 1st
Newsletter in the FAAC (Ford Amateur
Astronomy Club). We discussed the articles, I
wrote them and he provided suggestions we
went back and forth and he gave good criticism
and ideas to revise the articles so they wouldn’t
go to far over the edge. (I had a short dig on Stock photos in Apple Collector template
the Medical Pot laws for example, which were
over the edge in relation to the HRJ
Observatory. )
One of the things I brought up was what if
the April edition is a hit. What can we do for
an encore for next year? Greg suggested we
could spring a May 1st issue. He said it could
be in honor of Communist May 1st
celebrations. This is both funny and ironic as Perhaps the new industrial US output shown above.
events started to conspire against me to
provide a wealth of material in this INSIDE
materialistic society. We live in a material Retirement
world to quote a famous Madonna song. And Legal Tender
this materialism is “evil” according to No photos
communism, and also “unbridled capitalism is Corporatocracy
evil as well”.
Continued on Page 2
Blonde logic

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MAY DAY EDITION!
Amazing how great a stock photo can look.
WHY THE MAY DAY EDITION?
There was a saying in Russia after the
Soviet Union fell. “The things they told us
about communism was a lie, but the things
they said about capitalism was true.
Sayings like these provides a wealth of
material for our May Day Edition.
CONFUSING CAPITALISM WITH COMPETITION
People can confuse capitalism with
competition. They think that unbridled
competition is a bad thing, but competition
is the nature and the way the world (without
mercy) works. Competition is in the natural
world and it exists as a part of nature. The
things we see that are so damaging today
are due to trends, greed, and limited
resources in the world.
I could go on with some different theories
and “peak oil” is a favorite doom theory
that I study. Is it true? Peak Oil is a way of
looking at energy efficiency from the big
global picture. With oil crisis in the past,
there have been many false alarms (“cry
wolf ”) scenarios, when a bear comes to the
village people ignore the real threat. The
“Bear” I speak of is a wretched state of the
world, with limited resources. Peak Oil is
deals with bell curves of depletion of
natural resources and the explosive growth
May Day Special Communist Edition | | www.apple.com/iwork you don’t
PAGE 2
Another happy shopper, made in ?
of population and demand that cannot be
met. A web site called “The Crash Course”
puts Peak Oil and the economic crash
together nicely. A well documented doom
version of “peak oil” you can always google,
LATOC (life after the oil crash).
For A Fun read and
PEAK OIL MEANS FUEL SUPPLIES GLOBALLY the real story.
VANISH BECAUSE THEY ARE FINITE
This is a big problem. It’s bigger than
See the next page.
m a c o - e c o n o m i c s, i t ’s b i g g e r t h a n
conspiracies, it’s epoch, age changing if
true. It could spell the permanent decline This page just goes
of the age of moder n technology. into a little
C a p i t a l i s m i s m o re e f fi c i e n t t h a n economic doom and
communism, but in a declining state of gloom.
world resources, there doesn’t seem to be a
good model or system to handle a “forced
power down”. I say forced, because it’s not
embraced, but fought by the nature of
competition between groups and nations.
It’s a forced power down, because nature
forces it on us.. We do nice things like take
resources and create complex fuel and
resource chains for all matters of
production, goods, even food. (See “My life
as an Economic Hitman”) This all requires
fuel, and raw materials. As China and
India advance, they need more resources
and less are available for the USA.
MAY DAY EDITION!
The Retirement Gift
(A true story from 4-30-2010)
A fellow co-worker, who at times helped me
out, but of course that was his job, retired
this week. He had no retirement party. His
boss gave him $75 in a card however. I
wanted to give him something. My first gift
was actually a gag gift and the second one
an adventure type gift that would both
surprise him and give him a good story to
tell.
The first gift was a mug someone left
who retired earlier. I walked up to his cube
which is in a different location far away
from my workstation and said, well I don’t
know what to give you since you’re leaving
and I thought I might as well give you this.
I held my ipad in my hand but had a coffee
mug behind it held by one of my fingers.
His eyes grew big for a moment, thinking I
was about to hand him the iPad. I know it
was a bad joke. I handed him the mug and
said, here, Mike left this when he retired
and he took the coffee mug and a couple of
us had a little laugh.
Some make a big deal about
retirement, others try to sneak out. One of
our workers left and didn’t tell his
supervisor. They were going to write him
up and found out he retired silently and was
just gone. Perhaps one of the best
retirements.
THE WATCH
I was telling my mother about the guy
leaving at work. He actually was going to
return and finish tidying up his workspace,
delete his emails, etc. I wondered out loud
if I should give him a better gift. Why not
the watch? She stated. I had already
thought about it in my mind. The watch.
It was a keepsake or something I actually
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PAGE 3
bought. Watches make good traditional
retirement gifts. They are something much
better than a mug. I wonder if I should
give him the watch.
This watch is kind of special, but also
it’s just something I bought. It’s a
watch from the COLD WAR
ERA. It’s a watch I bought
from a bible smuggler I used
to hang out with. She had
smuggled bibles and children’s
literature behind the Iron
Curtain during the dying days
of the Soviet Union. She was
an amazing person to talk to
and had many stories where
The Retirement Gift April 30th 2010
she apparently heard God,
listened to him and literally
followed his directions and leading. Doing
things like “look up” at certain times, while
not knowing what to do next and found her
contacts and connections without ever
In a race between
having an organization guide her or even
tell her how to smuggle bibles to the Soviet
the tortoise and the
Union. hare, the bunny
I bought this watch from her, it was rabbit was faster
something that would provide profits to and used up
someone behind the iron curtain and her resources quicker.
selling a few of the watches would help
them buy a washing machine in the USSR
Maybe if the west
or something. So I had this Soviet era
watch sitting in my sock drawer for 20
used materials
years, and who wouldn’t want this as a quicker, the leftover
retirement gift. It’s a watch and has a very materials would give
interesting story. This guy agrees to come the communists
by my cube, where I hope to surprise him more “reserves of
with the watch, then he’s distracted on real wealth” for the
other floors and leaves, without coming by. end of the race.
Okay. . . I guess it’s no watch for you.
See Page 4 for further May Day themes.
MAY DAY EDITION! PAGE 4

The Apple iPad 3g

RELEASED JUST IN TIME FOR MAY DAY
I’m hoping that this iPad 3g will not
muck up the ATT network. I’m
hoping it’s not a conspiracy from the
Chinese Communists to take down the
communication cells and all we’ll get is a
busy signal. Wouldn’t that be a great
way to start out the movie Red Dawn
2? I saw some filming of Red Dawn
2 take place outside a window near my
workplace. The Story, “Chinese taking
over the USA”. A co-incidence? You
be the judge.
So here I am standing in line again
at Ann Arbor’s Mall near I-94. I won’t
name the mall, but those of you who
live in Michigan know of the place.
I’m standing here and waiting for this
iPad and I already have a WIFI model.
I know I don’t need it, but I want to have
the 3g option. I want to have the
ability to surf anywhere with a really
cool device.
I want, I want, I want. . . this is the
mantra of the American Consumer.
Astronomers are great consumers. Our
hobby can take us to the depths of
materialism which raises it’s ugly face.
I can use astronomy or computers as
my excuse to own a 3g. And how many
excuses of “need” are used by others
standing in line.
A lady in front of me started to
cry, explaining some medical crisis a
relative has. Another lady comforts her
and they hug a bit. They are teary
eyed and tired. (This is a very
interesting mix of folks in line today.)
A third lady in front says she hates
standing in line and never wanted to
stand in line in this country. She used
to stand in line in the old country and
vowed to never do it again. What
country was that, I asked. Cuba, she
replied. How long ago was this? 50
years ago. She didn’t even look to be
50 years old, and when I mentioned
this, she thanked me for the
compliment. Yet here she was in line
with the rest of us. Standing in this
capitalistic line of commercial
buying frenzy. Well it wasn’t exactly
a cabbage patch fight, but all us “cool”
Apple owners were silently waiting to
get another device from our guru Steve
Jobs. The Apple sign shined like a
glowing piece of forbidden fruit on the
storefront. The fruit of the tree of
knowledge is commonly referred to as
an Apple and we were there in line
waiting to take a bite.
I took a photo of the line. A mall
guard interrupts with, “excuse me sir,
this is private property” and “you can’t
take photos in the mall”. I hold up my
evil iphone for him to see my photo.
Continued On Page 3

The Forbidden photo of the line - Fellow Apple drones stand in line to pay with plastic. Legal Tender No More? Is this what they mean by the Apple Revolution?

May Day Special Communist Edition | | www.apple.com/iwork you don’t

MAY DAY EDITION!
iPad 3g - Communist bread line
(continued from page 4)
Do you want me to delete the picture? I
ask. The guard replies, “No, you can
keep that picture, you already took it.”
Apparently mall security isn’t what it
used to be. I immediately fired up my
BlogPress blogging software on the
iphone. I post a quick blog entry on
the HJR observatory blog about the
forbidden picture, my first scoop.
I wonder if there’s a rule against
posting live blog messages with illegal
mall photos? It’s on “the net” now.
Maybe Security ninjas will stake out
my exit and try to detain me because of
the cyber-breach.
The mall guard moves on. Of
course to Apple faithful and other
shoppers in the mall this is a media
event. They all have cell phones.
Many are taking photos left and right.
Maybe more left than right today, if
they want to be politically correct.
Other mall guards are around.
I’m not sure where the original vigilant
guard went, perhaps a donut break.
The people in line wait patiently.
An employee walks along the line and
explains this is only a credit card line.
They will only accept credit cards to
sell the iPad 3g, no cash.
No cash? Did I hear him right?
This peaks my interest and I start to ask
questions. No cash, what are you
talking about? Why no cash? He
explains for “security reasons” they
don’t accept cash? There are plenty of
guards around and I don’t see hordes of
vikings in the mall about to attack, so I
wonder what the heck does he mean by
May Day Special Communist Edition | | www.apple.com/iwork you don’t
security reasons.? He further explains
that they don’t want people buying
them and reselling them for a profit on
ebay. This of course doesn’t make any
more sense than the security reason.
No cash? Is is some kind of TOS
license agreement? Wait a minute I
reply before he can answer. There is
no agreement for purchase of 3g
contract it’s pay as you go. So if there
is no agreement, why the “no cash”
terms?
He isn’t sure why, but there is some
reason for this. I wonder if Apple is
afraid of people taking the iPad 3g and
using it as some kind of terrorist device
without knowing who bought it. But
that doesn’t make sense. He assures me
“Apple has a big legal department” and
this is perfectly legal. I tell him I doubt
this is legal and if I stood in line and
offered cash and they refused I could
call the police and walk away with a
new iPad without paying, because they
are not accepting LEGAL TENDER
FOR ALL DEBTS PUBLIC AND
PRIVATE. This is what cash is, and
what legal tender means. And it’s what
soldiers fight for, darn it. In “God We
Trust”, not some form of banker
VISA. But in the Apple line, we
h a ve a p p a re n t l y e n t e re d a
cashless society. A society for
Politically Correct Apple drones. I stay
in the line, but call a fellow drone
buddy to report this and ask him to
bring down some cash. You know I’m
PAGE 5
good for it I tell him. But he’s too busy
to bring cash.
I probably should have walked
away to a money machine and took out
the cash, just to see what happened if I
offered them cash. I imagined security
forces hauling me off and throwing me
off the property onto State Street.
I planned on using VISA
anyway. . . so what the hay, I decided to
stay in line.
I mentioned to the Cuban lady in
line there’s a good song about Cuba in
an old Bing Crosby Movie (Blue Skies).
I give a little rendition. . . “Cuba, that’s
where I’m going, Cuba, that’s where I’ll
stay” (in my best Crosby
impersonation.) . . . she’s never heard
of it. But here we are in a cashless
Cuban queue, waiting for our
materialistic devices.
I carefully watched the Apple logo
hoping it wouldn’t morph into a Red
Star. I suppose the US dollar is falling
in value over time; I should have asked
them if they take the Yuan. Most
laptops are made in Communist China
now anyway, if the Chinese stop
accepting dollars (like Apple apparently
has), the US will be in trouble.
I continue with my happy and ironic
chatter. I’m asking the women in front
of me if they are buying the iPad for
themselves or others. They are
standing in line for others. This is due
to the 5PM release no doubt. It’s like
sending your old grandmother in the
bread line in the Soviet Union while
you work. (continued next page)
MAY DAY EDITION!
Apple iPad 3g - purchase with free coupons
One of guys mentions his wife and
father in law have a place in Cuba and
visit there, but he cannot, because he’s
a US citizen. We’re still banned from
visiting Cuba. And the Cuban lady tells
me she won’t be going back there. We
talk about how nobody really “needs an
iPad” and the Cuban lady sounds
convincing. The Cuban lady in the line
also mentioned that “we’d probably
look back in a few years and wonder
why we stood in line for this.” I agreed
and added, “we’ll probably be standing
in line for bread in a couple of years,
and wonder why we stood in line for an
iPad”.
I told the Cuban lady, you are so
convincing at how silly we are standing
in line for an iPad, I think you should
go tell others in line. You can convince
them. Others nearby agreed, and I
suggested for the good of mankind she
could go to all those in front of the line
(before me) and convince them to go
home. “That way I’ll be in the front of
the line. Then you can work on the
others behind me.” (This suggestion
was a met with a few smiles.) The
store finally opens and the line starts to
move.
Finally I’m approached by a pretty
fiery red head, she’s too pretty and
busy directing us drones to question
about “cash buying”. She’s just there
to take me to a sales person.
My parting shot to others in line
behind me was each iPad purchase
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FOR THERAPY
comes with a coupon for pycho-
therapy, they of course all got it and
some seemed to be willing to take a
coupon.
I get a blonde girl who “recognizes
me from an earlier sale”, or perhaps
she’s just using that line on me to make
me feel like less geeky and more
welcome. These Apple employees
seem to be local college students.
(Maybe they have a completely
different view of the US Constitution
and money, after all this in Ann Arbor,
they probably take Pot instead of cash
at the Apple store.)
My blonde sales girl asks me what
size I ordered? (You’ll do, I thought,
but I passed on that pick up line.) They
had pre-quizzed us in line asking us
what we’d buy. I replied I wanted a 16
gig 3g. I made many entertaining
remarks. But perhaps I confused my
being a smart shopper, with being a
smart ass.
So I followed my blonde
dutifully . . . (this line sounds so good I
had to write it.) So I followed my sales
lady to a desk and she’s holding an iPad
for me. She asks me about accessories
and I want a leather case I saw during
the first day launch. She can’t recall
such a case. All the cases they have in
stock don’t seem to have the vari-
angled stand feature I’m looking for.
I tell her I’ll pass, and just use the
current case. Maybe shop again later
for a second case. So I purchase only
PAGE 6
the iPad 3g with 16 gigs. The cost with
tax is 666 dollars and some change.
(Isn’t that the mark of the beast?)
Another bad omen. I recall a story
from a guy years ago stating VISA in
Latin means VI or 6 and SA means
“repeat twice” (or 666), I ignore this
thought and pass her my VI SA.
Apply has nothing to do with ATT
activation, the cute blonde remarks.
I mention my confusion about the
“no cash policy” and she says
something to the effect that Apple can
do this because they are a private
company.
They are a private company?
This is news to me. I’m amazed at the
blonde logic offered to me. “A private
company?” The wording on our
currency is “LEGAL TENDER FOR
ALL DEBTS PUBLIC AND
PRIVATE” (see photo.)
I mention that money is supposed
to be accepted everywhere. I then
inform her Apple is not a private
company, and it’s stock traded on a
public stock exchange.
Apparently iPad training doesn’t
include constitutional, trade or even
financial knowledge, but she was a nice
looking blonde.
I wanted to check her out more
closely to be sure I wasn’t dealing with
some kind of Vincent Price movie-like
blonde android - perhaps made in
China. (I resisted that temptation.)
MAY DAY EDITION!
Apple iPad 3g - micro sim chip included
JUST LIKE THE PROTOTYPE LOST IPHONE IT USES A MICRO SIM CHIP
The blonde girl, I forgot her name, but
I remember her perfume. . .seemed to
be a bit confused with my questions.
She seemed to be at the point where
she’d admitted she’d probably accept
cash. Maybe they only wanted a credit
card for iTunes activation, or to make
things quicker. We went through the
usual procedure; I signed a little iphone
like screen credit card reader. I told
her, “you need a larger pad for us to
sign”. If I could sign my long name on
the iPad, at least it would be legible.
I was happily directed to the
genius station to get my iPad registered.
Always register in the store. (These
Apple folks are really very nice and friendly.
In spite of my remarks above, they really do
make you feel at home and are friendly.)
Some even remembered me and some
of the trinkets I brought earlier.
(With the iPad, everyone I meet really
wants one, they just don’t have enough credit.)
The genius dude, helped me
register the iPad with iTunes. He gave
some useful remarks. We then tried to
sign up for ATT service. He was just
trained for one hour, but wasn’t 100%
sure which menu to use. I was his first
ATT signup. Being a part of the Apple
drone hive, I was able to quickly buzz
through the only menu that seemed to
make sense and register for ATT. We
learned and it worked.
I picked the “250 meg a month
limit” because the blonde stated that’s a
good idea and you can always upgrade
when the warnings arrive. You can try
May Day Special Communist Edition | | www.apple.com/iwork you don’t
to keep your usage down to 250 megs a
month to save money and then
upgrade at any time. (This is a nice
feature.) I really appreciated her
suggesting this and want to see how
that works for my iPad review. I can
always say “a blonde told me”, if
people ask why I did this. That has a
nice ring to it, “a blonde told me”.
On the way home I called Greg
Ozimek to let him know about the
strange cashless policy. He quickly
mentioned, this is a great May Day
theme.
It all made sense. The forbidden
photos, the long line, the cuban, people
weeping and seeking a seat, old ladies
waiting in a queue for others, the rush
to protect and stop profiteering from
grey market sales as the excuse for “no
cash”. (If you think about it the US
dollar was the preferred dollar for the
black market in repressed countries.) In
the Soviet Union they had “prepay”
long distance phone cards in the 60s.
Having the dollar forbidden from
Steve Job’s bread line, just made
sense in so many ways. A new
May Day was dawning. Red Dawn 2
had arrived, just not at the theatres.
I mentioned to the tech this micro-
sim chip looks a lot like the same sim in
the possible iphone prototype Gizmado
reviewed. He replied he can’t say
anything about that. . . (Apple state
secrets you know).
Later that night in Krogers I swear
I heard a manager quietly state to a
PAGE 7
worker, mayday, mayday. Was the
conspiracy spreading? I wish I could
say that many of the events written
here are good fiction, but every
material statement in this
account is true. I’ve left out names
to protect the guilty.
For a good conspiracy theory to
h av e t r a c t i o n yo u n e e d m o r e
coincidences. I also want to give the
following as further evidence something
bad is afoot.
May 1st is the first day in
Michigan that public SMOKING
BAN. Unless you run a casino or a
cigar bar.
Cigars and casinos are signs of
Cuba. Co-incidence for May 1st? I
don’t think so.
Also May 1st is the expiration date
on the real estate closing government
tax break to help sell houses. We
heading for a housing slump starting
May 1st.
This could be the beginning of the
revolution, just not the one we thought
Apple was selling us.
Later after writing this I stop at a
Sunoco to buy gasoline. The guy
behind the counter is bowing down in a
ritual prayer for 2 minutes. He doesn’t
even say hello, he’s busy. He’s on a
sheet of plastic folded with a piece of
cloth inside, when he’s finished I give
him $20 for pump 2. I haven’t the
heart to tell him he’s facing Montreal
instead of Mecca. At least he’s still
taking cash.