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Alone
ֽ ָ ו ְָע֥שׂוּ ִל֖י ִמק ְ֑דָ ּשׁ ו
ְשׁ ַכנ ְ֖תִ ּי ְבּתוֹכָ ֽם׃
I returned to the city of my birth last Shabbos as the guest of a shul there. The
community had invited me to serve as what we call in לשון גוזמאa scholar in residence.
My presentations weren't very scholarly and two nights on a pullout bed can hardly be
called residence. It was nevertheless very special. Just blocks from my boyhood home in
Northeast Philadelphia, and together with my sister, her husband, children and grand-
children, I experienced a rush of memories of the sixteen years of my life in that city be-
fore my childhood ended with the loss of my father ע"ה.
On Sunday morning, my nephew drove me to Wynnefield where I had the op-
portunity to deliver a shiur b'iyun to serious b'nai Torah and then visit with the Kaminet-
sky family both with the saintly Rebbetzin ' שתחat home and with her son Rav Shalom
Kaminetsky שליט"אin the famed Philly yeshiva.
It has been almost forty-three years since I last stepped into that sacred place. It
was smaller than I remembered but much warmer. Exchanging words of Torah with
Rav Shalom was an immense privilege and an immeasurable pleasure.
Sitting with Rav Shalom, it wasn't פרק המניח את הכד, the גירסא דינקותאwith which I
struggled in that very room, that crept into my thoughts. It was a poem I learned with
my Hebrew teacher at Gratz College that year, Mrs. Balfoura Held: ( לבדיAlone) by
Haim Nachman Bialik ע"ה. When I thought about it later, it seemed sacrilegious, at least
at first. Bialik laments the deserted בית המדרש, narrow and dark, where the שכינהhuddles
in a darkened corner. The poet senses himself alone under the broken wings of the
Shekhina. It was once surrounded by flocks of birds who have flown away toward the
light outside. He senses himself a fledging, for he too will be borne away like the wind.
As Philadelphia receded in my rear view mirror, I wondered why Bialik came to
me. I feel more at home in the בית המדרשthan I ever have. I am surrounded continually
by younger minds with fresh enthusiasm for the הוויות דאביי ורבאthat animate me. And
yet there is a palpable sense of solitariness that afflicts a man of a certain age and per-
haps those of other ages as well. I feel it particularly in places in which I have not been
for some time.
In the command to build the מקדשin פרשת תרומה, the nation is charged with
preparing a separate place designated for Him so that He may dwell among בני ישראל.
The end of the פסוקis unexpected: the מקדשis constructed not so הקב"הcan dwell in it
( )בתוכוbut among them ()בתוכם. A physical locale cannot contain a non-corporeal Entity.
When the people coalesce around that place, however, the שכינהis present.
Our lives are constructed not around place but around the people who dwell to-
gether with us in them. The tragedy and the promise of our lives is that there is an ever
changing cast around us. On the long drive back to Teaneck, I thought about the people
who made me what I am today whom I first encountered in Philadelphia. They define
that place for me.
And so it was for Bialik:
הִיא- וְהַשְּׁכִינָה אַף, בָּדָד נִשְׁאַרְתִּי,בָּדָד
.רֹאשִׁי הִרְעִידָה-כְּנַף יְמִינָהּ הַשְּׁבוּרָה עַל
Alone, I was left alone, and the Shekhina as well,
Her broken right wing trembling over my head.
When we lose the people who define our world, the Shekhina is, כביכול, diminished and
we feel abandoned and alone.
, כֻּלָּם פָּרְחוּ לָהֶם,ַכֻּלָּם נָשָׂא הָרוּח
... לְבַדִּי,וָאִוָּתֵר לְבַדִּי
They all were borne by the wind, flown away,
and I remain alone, alone...
But there are new people who come in their place: sons, daughters, and grandchildren.
The בית המדרשfills every year with new faces and new songs of Torah. And sometimes I
catch a glimpse of my mother in a daughter's smile, my father's laugh in my own at a
son's antics, the words of my teacher in the questions of my student. The שכינהgrows
fuller when my place fills with those who share the brief episode in time alloted me on
this earth and the pain of loneliness recedes.
שבת שלום
These sichos are published by students of Rav Ozer Glickman shlit"a. We can be reached at ravglickmanshiur@gmail.com
Rav Glickman can be reached directly at ozer.glickman@yu.edu
Seudah Shlishit:
Shopping for God in the Marketplace of Orthodoxy
Motzaei Shabbat
Good Deal: Bringing Jewish Ethics to the Boardroom Table
TO BRING RAV GLICKMAN TO YOUR COMMUNITY, KINDLY CONTACT:
Ms. Rebecca Goldberg
YU Center for the Jewish Future
rebecca.goldberg@yu.edu
212-960-5400 ext.6350