FAST NEIN: THE FAST & THE FHRER

Written by

Jordan VanDina

WWW.WEEKENDSCRIPTS.COM
FADE IN:

TITLE CARD: Germany. 1895.

INT. CHILDS BEDROOM - NIGHT

A SMALL BOY plays with a replica toy Volkswagen. He makes

engine noises with his mouth and races the car around his
room.

Arguing can be heard loudly in the hallway.

MAN (O.S.)
I cant deal with this anymore. I
work every Goddamn day to put
schnitzel on this table...

WOMAN (O.S.)
Who is she? Tell me her name.

The boy takes the car and runs it up his bed and makes it
slowly crash into a toy helicopter that is in his other hand.

ALOUIS, 40s, barges into the boys room holding a suitcase.

ALOUIS
Adolf... Son... stop playing with
your toys.

THE BOY is revealed to be ADOLF HITLER, age 6.

ADOLF
Yes, father?

ALOUIS
Im leaving. Im not coming back
either.

ADOLF HITLER
What?

ALOUIS
Look, I met a Jewish lady at
Oktoberfest and she may not be the
best looking gal around and she
nags a bit but she treats me right.

ADOLF HITLER
What about our family?
 2.

ALOUIS
Family is bullshit, Adolf. Remember
that. Family does not matter... The
only thing that matters...

Alouis picks up Adolfs toy car.

ALOUIS (CONTD)
A mans car. Its the only way to
escape. If you have your car, you
have power. You have freedom.

Alouis grabs his suitcase and walks out. Adolf studies his
father leaving. A rage builds in his eyes.

FAST NEIN: THE FAST & THE FHRER

EXT. RACETRACK - PRESENT DAY

Cars speed around a track. The Engines rumble with intense,

intimidating, power.

DOM TORETTO, Vin Diesel, is behind the wheel. We are close on

his face. He studies the track. The curves; the pavement; he
is one with his automobile.

Dom checks his rear view mirror, driving the car behind him
is BILLY, a 9 year old child.

DOM
Lets dance, you chubby bitch.

We pull out to reveal Dom is racing at a bumper car track in

an amusement park. He quickly swerves and cuts Billy off.

Dom is not doing well, he has a 5 OClock shadow and looks

like he may have gained 15-20 pounds pretty recently.

Billy looks nervous, he doesnt want any trouble, his

forehead starts to sweat.

DOM (CONTD)
Not so tough now are you?

BILLY
Stop. I dont know what I did but
Im sorry.

The child speeds up. So does Dom.

 3.

BILLY (CONTD)
Help. Somebody please save me.

Dom stops his go-kart and watches Billy continue around the
track which is separated in the middle by a body of water.

DOM
Only God can save you now, Billy.

Dom waits for the perfect second then presses a button on his
go-kart steering wheel that activates a NOS tank.

Doms go-kart shoots off at full speed straight towards the

water, it clears the bank totally and goes airborne...

BILLY
NOOOO!!!!!!

Doms go-kart gets over the water and crashes directly into
Billys.

A crowd that was watching gasps in horror. Billys kart is

flipped. Dom stands over him.

DOM
Never fuck with my family.

EXT. FUN ZONE GO-KART & GAMES - LATER

Doms MANAGER, sits behind a desk and scolds Dom.

MANAGER
Dom, we gotta let you go. This is
the third incident this week.

DOM
What I do?

MANAGER
Well, aside from installing a
Nitrous Oxide system in a company
go-kart, you intentionally harassed
a customer, cursed at a child and
crashed a Dodge Charger on hole 3
of our mini-golf course. And, I
wasnt going to say anything but do
you have a gun on your ankle?

Dom puts his pant leg down to cover his gun and cracks a
smile. This is classic Vin Diesel!
 4.

DOM
Guess you dont give a shit about
family.

MANAGER
Why do you keep accusing me of
that?

Dom throws a bunch of black and white surveillance photos on

the table. The photos show little Billy bumping another car.

DOM
That little shit was bumping my
nephew Jack.

MANAGER
Its bumper cars, Dom. They are
meant to be bumped... Sorry, I
really am, but I have to fire you.

DOM
Thats okay... Sometimes to live in
the heat, you gotta die in the
fire.

The manager is very confused by what Dom just said.

MANAGER
Okay?

INT. DOMS HOUSE - NIGHT

Dom walks in his house. His nephew, JACK OCONNER, runs up

and hugs him.

DOM
Whats up, little Jack? I got you a
toy.

Dom hands Jack a used spark plug covered in oil. Its sharp
and probably fairly dangerous for a child to handle.

JACK
Thanks, uncle Dom!

DOM
Run along. Later on Ill tell you
about how I jumped a car out of a
plane and didnt have a scratch on
me.

Jack runs off. MIA, Doms sister, walks in from the kitchen.
 5.

MIA
Dom, can we talk?

DOM
I let my engine talk for me.

MIA
Yeah well maybe you can use your
mouth for this one...

Dom looks offended by that statement.

MIA (CONTD)
Did you cut the brakes on Principal
Allens Buick today?

Dom cracks a Corona. Dom loves Corona, it makes him feel at

home. Dom loves home.

DOM
That prick principal said Jack
isnt excelling at math.

MIA
He isnt. He is really struggling.
He needs a tutor.

DOM
Eh, who cares. Street criminals
dont need math anyway.

MIA
I dont want him to be a street
criminal, Dom... Look, I know
youve been trying to step in as a
father since...

DOM
Since what, Mia? Since Brian
disappeared? A kid needs a father,
Mia. Not just a mama, Mia.

Dom throws his beer bottle against the wall. He opens another
one instantly.

MIA
Youre not a father, Dom. Youre
just the drunk uncle...

Dom stares at the broken bottle against the wall. Mias words
really resonate, Dom pulses with rage and smashes his bottle
on the ground. He grabs another one.
 6.

INT. LIVING ROOM - LATER

Dom is in a pile of Coronas and his own filth watching

television.

ANGLE ON TV:

Donald Trump is at a rally raising his arm a lot like Hitler

as he addresses the crowd.

DONALD TRUMP
And so Im gonna build a wall, keep
those pesky Mexicans out, and also
my dick is bigger than everyone in
here. Combined. Thank you. Its
Great. My dick is great. Huge. Its
a fantastic rod. One of the best
ever. My Penis has been very, very
successful.

ANGLE ON LIVING ROOM:

Dom changes the channel to the SPEED NETWORK as he nods off.

ANGLE ON TV:

The show is called Cars Throughout History and is profiling

Hitlers automobiles.

HOST
Hitler had a number of expensive
cars in his arsenal during World
War 2. Including a BMW R75 and a
fleet of expensive Mercedes. But
the pride of his life was his suped
up Volkswagen Kbelwagen... Here is
a clip of Hitler racing it down a
German side street.

EXT. GERMANY - 1941

ADOLF HITLER, speeds around in his Volkswagen laughing. He

runs down people on the sidewalk, cuts the wheel and totally
Tokyo drifts into a crowd of people.

HITLER
You should look both ways before
you cross! Am I REICH?

As Hitler speeds through town he passes a number of posters

that have a man on them. The poster reads THE PERFECT ARYAN
SOLDIER.
 7.

The image on all the posters are of a blonde haired, blue

eyed, gentle-faced man. Infact... It looks like a lot like
Brian OConner, Paul Walker, from the other FAST movies.

ANGLE ON LIVING ROOM:

Dom rubs his eyes awake and looks a little closer at the
screen.

DOM
What the Hell?

Dom gets closer to the television. Studying the posters in

WW2 Germany.

DOM (CONTD)
Is that Brian?... BRIAN?!

Dom picks up his beer bottle and smashes it into the TV. Mia
runs out.

MIA
Thats it, Dom. Youre out of here.
Im sorry.

EXT. DOMS HOUSE - NIGHT

Dom walks down the street. He looks jacked in the moonlight.

Sort of like he got a pump in right before this take. Maybe
did some pushups in the dressing room. Either way for 48
years old Vin Diesel is in incredible shape.

A blacked-out Suburban pulls up behind Dom. The SUV parks and

someone is heard getting out. Dom keeps walking.

MYSTERIOUS VOICE
We need to talk...

DOM
I let my engine talk for me...

MYSTERIOUS VOICE
You do huh? Well this is an A-B
conversation, so C your way to my
D.

DOM
Excuse me?

The mystery man revs his engine. Dom doesnt have a car so he
looks around the street, the only thing around him is a SMART
CAR.
 8.

Dom gets slightly nauseous at the idea of driving a Smart Car

but then shatters the window and jumps in. THE RACE IS ON!

INT. SMART CAR - CONTINUOUS

Dom looks around for the NOS button, this piece of shit
hippie car doesnt even a Nitrous Oxide tank, what the fuck?

DOM
It aint that smart.

Dom laughs to himself. That was genuinely funny.

Dom sees the Suburban shoot past him. This Smart Car doesnt
stand a chance, Unless...

EXT. 711 - NIGHT

Dom flies the Smart Car that he just stole into a 711 parking
lot.

INT. 711 - CONTINUOUS

Dom is at the counter with 100 bottles of whip cream.

711 CLERK
Having an ice cream party?

DOM
Something like that.

Dom gives the 711 employee a coy smirk.

EXT. SMART CAR - NIGHT

Dom sets up the 100 cans of whip cream in the tail pipe of
the Smart Car, these cans are stacked with Nitrous Oxide.

INT. SMART CAR - CONTINUOUS

As Dom sparks the engine the cans ignite and the nitrous
propels Dom a thousand miles an hour into the street, he
instantly catches up with the Suburban.

EXT. STREETS - CONTINUOUS

Dom and the Suburban are toe to toe, whip cream shoots from
the smart car.
 9.

DOM
Warning, roads may be slippery...
and sweet!

Dom laughs so fucking hard at his own joke that he loses

control of the wheel.

The Smart Car skids out on the whip cream and shoots into an
embankment, slamming into a tree.

The mystery man grabs Doms body and carries it into the
Suburban.

INT. DIPLOMATIC SECURITY SERVICE OFFICE - NIGHT

Dom is propped up in a chair. He starts to wake up.

DOM
Where the Hell am I?

Dom sits at a table across from the mystery man, AKA, HOBBS,
Dwayne The Rock Johnson, the greatest international crime-
stopper the world has ever known. His arms slathered in baby
oil shimmer even in the dimly lit offices of the DSS.

Seriously, I dont want to go on and on about how much baby

oil is on Hobbs arms but Jesus Christ, you could wring those
biceps out like a towel and fill a baby pool with all the
moisture dripping off.

HOBBS
See you still got your temper. You
are one angry sumbitch... Good to
see you.

Hobbs and Dom hug. Man, getting to see The Rock and Vin
Diesel together, two TITANS of the muscular actor world.
Incredible. You literally see the ground shake when they hug;
crew members on set will legit get scared when it happens.

DOM
What am I doing here, Hobbs? Did
you track that psychopath I gave
you the name of last month?

Hobbs checks his computer and a picture of a child pops up.

HOBBS
Matty Higgins, 7 years old, scared
of fireworks and the dark. Addicted
to gummy worms. Biggest offense,
putting silly putty in Sally
Mayfields hair.
 10.

DOM
I want him dead.

HOBBS
Dom, you cant kill a child for
stealing your nephews lunch money
one time.

Dom puts his hand on his gun.

DOM
Ive killed for less.

HOBBS
We found him, Dom...

Hobbs brings up a picture of Brian OConner, Paul Walker, on

the flat screen monitor.

DOM
Dont mess with me.

HOBBS
Brian OConner is alive.

DOM
Where is he?

HOBBS
Its not where, Dom. Its when.

INT. DSS TOP SECRET SPECIAL ROOM - CONTINUOUS

The computer screens show Germany in the 1940s. Hitler is in

power. Posters of Brian OConner are all around the city.

HOBBS
About 24 months ago we came across
a time travel technology. My first
inclination was to time travel back
to our first fight so I could kick
your pansy ass again...

Hobbs and Dom both run towards each other and hold their
fists to each other faces. They have so much fucking
testosterone running through their veins, its sick. But at
the end of the day, theyre family...

DOM
You couldnt kick my ass if my ass
was the size of a building and you
had 300 feet.
 11.

HOBBS
Keep dreaming. Naturally we wanted
to use this time travel technology
to go back and avert disasters
throughout history.

DOM
I follow.

HOBBS
We recruited OConner to go back in
time and kill Hitler. Blonde hair.
Blue eyes. He was the perfect Aryan
decoy. But something went wrong. He
went too deep undercover. We lost
contact.

Dom looks disgusted.

DOM
Why dont I just go back in time
and grab him. Wheres the time
machine now?

Hobbs is clearly distressed.

HOBBS
The sumbitch who sent that sumbitch
back in time disappeared. Went on
some rant about effecting the space-
time continuum. Some true nerd
shit. If I saw him now Id dunk his
head in the Goddamn toilet no
questions asked.

DOM
All I need is a name...

HOBBS
All I need is a perfect 10 model
and a fully raw bleedin steak but
we cant have everything we want
now can we?

DOM
Very good Hobbs. Ill be laughing
about that one on the 140 MPH ride
home.

HOBBS
The time traveler is a doctor.
Doctor Emmett Brown... Doc Brown
for short. Hes a little eccentric,
but hes our guy. Any questions?
 12.

DOM
Yeah... What am I driving?

EXT. DOC BROWNS HOUSE - NIGHT

Dom pulls up to a mansion in a slick American muscle car. V-

12 engine, probably gets 4 miles to the gallon, its so damn
badass.

As Dom is about to park, a DeLorean peels out of the garage

and into the street.

DOM
Oh... You want a race? A race I can
do.

Dom steps on the gas and tails the DeLorean. The Delorean
isnt going fast at all.

DOM (CONTD)
Youre gonna have to go a whole lot
faster than 88 if you want to beat
me, old man.

As Dom is about to bump the back of the DeLorean it

disappears in a bolt of light.

DOM (CONTD)
What the...?

EXT. SIDE STREET - NIGHT

Dom studies the street where the DeLorean disappeared. He

gets on his phone and calls Hobbs.

DOM
The car just vanished into thin
air.

HOBBS
Yep, that sounds like the sumbitch
we are looking for.

DOM
What do I do now?

HOBBS
Wait by his house, hell come back.
He always does...

Dom waits a beat.

 13.

DOM
Hobbs...

HOBBS
Yes?

DOM
Are you pumping right now?

HOBBS
Yeah, working a little tricep
before bed.

Dom smiles. He knows Hobbs.

DOM
Dont squeeze so hard on the
negative reps...

HOBBS
You can tell all that just by
listening over the phone?

DOM
Youre Goddamn right I can.

INT. DOC BROWNS GARAGE - LATER

DOC BROWN, from Back to the Future, pulls into his garage
slowly.

Doc Brown gets out of the car with a carton of popcorn and
all sorts of SWAG from Super Bowl IV. A shirt, a hat; clearly
he went back in time to watch an old Super Bowl.

A GUN COCK is heard. Doc Brown puts his hands up.

DOC BROWN
Great Scott!

DOM
The names Dom...

DOC BROWN
Dominic Toretto. I knew youd be
coming for me in time...

DOM
Speaking of time. I gotta go back.
Heard you were my man.
 14.

DOC BROWN
No. I refuse to meddle with history
any longer. Ive done enough
damage. Im sorry, but your friend
is gone.

Dom puts his gun away.

DOM
Hes not my friend... Hes my
family.

Doc Brown slowly turns around.

DOC BROWN
Do you realize if you go back to
get your friend and you even ruffle
a tree the wrong way that it could
cause dire consequences.

DOM
Thats a risk Im willing to take.

DOC BROWN
It could lead to Hitler winning
World War 2 and bringing
unfathomable chaos onto the world.

DOM
If it gets Brian back, none of that
matters... You gotta understand
something doc... Family is like the
ocean, it goes far and deep but if
its lost then so are we...

Every bro in the audience was just like Im so glad my

girlfriend didnt wanna see this shit because I am actually
tearing up right now. Im a pretty privileged dude so I
havent really cried since I was a kid so this is a true
surprise for me. Didnt even know I had this sort of emotion
in me to be honest.

Doc Browns eyes start to well up with tears.

DOC BROWN
Alright. Ill help you. Ill take
you back.

DOM
Good. But first we need to add the
Toretto touch to this beast.
 15.

INT. TEJS CAR SHOP - DAY

TEJ who is played by Ludacris so lets be honest we might as

well just call him Ludacris and Tyrese stand around the shop
doing some really fun goofy banter.

LUDACRIS
Your forehead so big, its like a
five-head. Or maybe even a six-
head! Dont make me say seven-head!

TYRESE
Yeah well in the original Fast
movie Ja Rule had your part so I
would calm the Hell down with your
cocky attitude!

LUDACRIS
What?

This banter goes on all day. You should see the outtakes, I
mean its hours and hours of Goddamn zingers. Tyrese does a
legit Borat impression, Im not kidding.

Dom walks in holding a case of Coronas.

DOM
You guys got time for family?

Ludacris and Tyrese run up and hug Dom.

DOC BROWN
(to himself)
Jeeze, this guy fuckin loves
family, huh?

DOM
This is my friend Doc Brown, he
built a time machine that we are
going to use to go back to Nazi
Germany to save OConner and kill
Hitler.

LUDACRIS
Word.

TYRESE
True.

Ludacris and Tyrese have heard it all at this point, they

aren't even phased by that statement.
 16.

DOM
But first, we need to make this car
a little more appealing to the eye.

LUDACRIS
Call me XZIBIT, cause Im gonna
PIMP THIS RIDE.

These guys have such natural chemistry its insane. Such a

thrill working with raw talent.

INT. CARPORT - LATER

Ludacris gives a tour of the revamped DeLorean which now has

flame decals on the outside.

LUDACRIS
As you can see this thing is
fucking dope as all Hell. Doc Brown
you are about to get MAD PUSSY!

DOC BROWN
Gross, Im almost 80.

Ludacris and Tyrese high five.

LUDACRIS
Now I ripped out them old ass seats
and put in full massage chairs,
added a mini-fridge to put some
beers in for when you want to drink
and drive and time travel and most
importantly, I took out that stupid
electric thing in the dash and
added a fucking flat screen! 1080p
Bitch!

DOC BROWN
What?!

LUDACRIS
Scarface on Blu-Ray while you
drive, homie. The special features
are bomb!

DOC BROWN
You ripped out the Flux Capacitor
you moron!

LUDACRIS
No need for name calling, bro. I
just did you a huge favor. Check
out the woofer!
 17.

Luda presses a button and BIGGIE starts blasting from the

subwoofer.

BIGGIE
Salt-N-Peppa, Heavy-D up in the
limousine...

DOC BROWN
Heavy. Theres that word again...

EXT. STREETS - DAY

Doc Brown, Dom, Tyrese and Ludacris are stuffed in the

DeLorean.

DOM
This thing is fully outfitted with
NOS so its gonna go a whole Hell
of a lot faster than 88. But back
up cause we are gonna need more
road.

DOC BROWN
Roads? Where were going, we dont
need roads.

DOM
Well we better need some roads
cause this is a franchise about
driving and we got 2 more films to
shoot.

DOC BROWN
Right. Where to first?

DOM
Lets see what this thing can do...

TIME TRAVEL MONTAGE BEGINS

- The year on the time gauge reads 2 million B.C.

They land in the jungle. They all look around and it seems
pretty normal. Then they start to hear a RUMBLE... RUMBLE...
RUMBLE... A T-Rex comes sprinting out towards the car.

The DeLorean races through trees and brush while the T-Rex
follows closely behind them.

LUDACRIS
Lets get the Hell out of here! But
first, lemme take a selfie!
 18.

The gang takes a four way selfie with a T-REX in the

prehistoric era.

TYRESE
Eat your heart out Ellen. Screw
that Oscar selfie. We going
Jurassic in this bitch! Hundred
thousand likes minimum.

LUDACRIS
This selfie was 65 million years in
the making!

The gang sets the year on the DeLorean and speeds off.

- The year on the time gauge reads 30 A.D.

The gang sit at the table of the Last Supper. Jesus grabs the
first piece of food.

DOM
You grabbed first food... You know
what that means. You gotta say
Grace.

JESUS
Come on really?

Tyrese looks at all the food on the table and does a mental
calculation.

TYRESE
Ugh, can we get separate checks?!

The table loses their shit laughing!

- The year on the time gauge reads 1994.

The DeLorean is racing OJs White Bronco down the highway.

TYRESE (CONTD)
Pull over! Youre gonna be fine. We
are from the future, they will find
you not guilty, Juice!

O.J.
Really?! You gotta be fucking
kidding me!

O.J. slows to a halt and surrenders without a fight.

- The year on the time gauge reads 1999.

 19.

The DeLorean pulls up to a movie theater with a giant line

outside of it. The marquee reads The Sixth Sense.

TYRESE
Bruce Willis is dead the whole
time!!!!

CROWD MEMBER #1
What the fuck?! NOOO!?!

CROWD MEMBER #2
Why did you just do that to us?
Why?!

- The year on the time gauge reads 2000.

Dom in the DeLorean races alongside Dom in his Charger at

Race Wars from the first Fast and Furious film.

They nod at each other and each trade important driving/life

metaphors with one another.

DOM FROM THE FUTURE

If you want to play in the desert,
you gotta work in the sand.

DOM FROM THE PAST

If you speed through life you
either miss whats important or pay
more attention to what really
matters...

The two Doms smile at each other.

END TRAVEL MONTAGE

EXT. TEJS CAR SHOP - NIGHT

DOM
Not bad. We just need to make one
more stop... Tell me this thing can
drift...

EXT. STREETS OF TOKYO - NIGHT

The time gauge on the DeLorean reads 2013. We are right back
in the scene from Tokyo Drift where Han dies.
 20.

Let me just say Tokyo Drift is pretty damn good, I mean

sure it doesnt have the star power and has a 38 year old
grown man playing a 17 year old high school student, but I
mean pound for pound, dick-pumping, car-driving, adrenaline
rush, its right up there with all the other movies. Dont
fight me on this please.

HAN lays on the ground after his car has crashed. JASON
STATHAM is walking towards him pointing a gun. The DeLorean
pulls up and grabs Han in.

Statham looks really confused.

JASON STATHAM
Eh, fuck it, maybe Ill do another
CRANK movie.

INT. TEJS CAR SHOP - NIGHT

Doc Brown, Dom, Han, Ludacris and Tyrese sit around the shop.

DOC BROWN
Not a bad looking team youve got
here.

DOM
Were more than a team, were...

WOMAN (O.S.)
Family...

Dom looks up enraged like who the fuck just finished my

sentence?

LETTY, Michelle Rodriguez, walks in with Hobbs. She runs up

and hugs Dom.

LETTY
Ride or die remember? Think Id
miss a chance to time travel?

DOM
Id like to time travel to the
first time I saw that ass and re-
live that moment over and over.

LETTY
Still got the charm.

Letty and Dom stare into each others eyes for a pretty long
time. The rest of the team is fairly uncomfortable.
 21.

HOBBS
Alright, yall sumbitches, now that
youve taken a tour of space and
time, lets go over the ground
rules.

As Hobbs is talking he is covering his arms in baby oil. They

are shining like the fire of a thousand suns.

HOBBS (CONTD)
Now, everyone knows to end a
nightmare you gotta shoot your
demons.

TYRESE
What?

HOBBS
You want to find a skunk you gotta
live in the stink.

DOM
Hobbs, what are you talking about
man?

HOBBS
Im talking about time travel. We
have 2 missions, capture Brian
OConner and bring him back...

DOM
And?

HOBBS
And murder Adolf fucking Hitler.

INT. ADOLF HITLERS BATHROOM - MORNING

Adolf Hitlers face has shaving cream all over it. He has
already shaved his beard and the left side of his mustache.

He practices a speech in the mirror.

HITLER
(to himself)
I am Hitler. Supreme leader and
really angry dude... God that
sounds so stupid. Get it together
Hitler.

Hitler continues to shave the right side of his mustache.

 22.

HITLER (CONTD)
I am Hitler, a total jerk... No.
COME ON HITLER. You are Hitler. You
can make a speech. This is what you
do!

Just as Hitler is about to shave the center of his mustache

the door to the bathroom flies open.

Hitler who is totally naked drops the razor and quickly

covers his micro-penis.

HITLER (CONTD)
NEIN!!!!!

EVA BRAUN, Hitlers wife, barges in. EVA is SMOKING HOT, Im

talking the face of Eva Mendez, the body of Eva Longoria and
the sass & attitude of EVE the rapper.

EVA BRAUN
What is taking you so long?

HITLER
EVA, Ill be out in a minute, I am
doing supreme leader things.
PLEASE.

EVA BRAUN
RIGHT NOW ADOLF.

Hitler walks out shamed, the center of his mustache still

remains. This is the first time he is trying out this look.
He doesnt really mind it.

HITLER
You dont have to be so mean all
the time do you know that?

INT. ADOLF HITLERS OFFICE QUARTERS - CONTINUOUS

Nazi regale and Swastikas line Hitlers home and office. On

his desk is also the toy Volkswagen he had as a child.

We see Brian OConner for the first time. He looks the same
physically but sort of out of it, doesnt have the spark that
he once had.

BRIAN OCONNER
Here is todays speech. You go on
in five minutes.

HITLER
Thank you.
 23.

Brian starts to walk out.

HITLER (CONTD)
Excuse me...

BRIAN OCONNER
Yes?

HITLER
Do you think this middle mustache
looks stupid?

BRIAN OCONNER
Looks great, mein Fhrer.

HITLER
Thank you.

EXT. HITLER RALLY - DAY

A crowd of thousands of men, women and children wait

patiently for this little man to come to the microphone. They
cheer and buzz with excitement.

Adolf Hitler approaches the podium. There is an audible

record scratch when the crowd sees that mustache. Whispers
start and everyone is talking to each other about how stupid
it looks.

HITLER
HEY. HEY GUYS. ITS COOL. Its the
new thing all the celebs are doing.
SHUT UP.

The crowd starts to laugh.

HITLER (CONTD)
SHUT THE FUCK UP. I am Adolf
Hitler. Supreme leader and supreme
jerk! You will treat me as such...

Hitlers face gets bright red. He is being shamed by his own

peple.

HITLER (CONTD)
(to himself)
Oh no I am losing the crowd.
Dammit.

The crowd hushes.

 24.

HITLER (CONTD)
Now. I want to tell you about an
important event coming up. One I
hold every year for anyone willing
to challenge me.

A plane flies by holding a painted sign that says THE 1941

ANAL MASTER RACE

HITLER (CONTD)
I painted that. Pretty good right?

CROWD MEMBER
You spelled Annual wrong. It says
anal.

HITLER
WHAT?!

Hitler looks at the sign.

HITLER (CONTD)
Kill that man!

A sniper shoots the crowd member in the head.

HITLER (CONTD)
Moving on... As you know the most
important thing in a mans life is
his car. Which is why I am holding
THE MASTER RACE.

The crowd goes wild.

HITLER (CONTD)
For those of you who are new here,
I will race around Germany, at the
finish line will be the access
codes to every nuclear weapon in
the country. If someone dares to
challenge me and beat me, they are
the new supreme leader. NOW... WHO
WANTS TO RACE ME?

There is a hush in the crowd. Just the idea of speaking up is

a death sentence.

HITLER (CONTD)
Come on. Anyone? There has yet to
be a single challenger in all the
years Ive been doing this.

People stare forward not making a sound.

 25.

HITLER (CONTD)
Well, guess Ill just drive around
myself again while everyone watches
me, thanks for...

MAN (O.S.)
Ill race you.

The crowd GASPS. Hitlers face turns to an angry scowl.

HITLER
Who said this? Show yourself.

Dom unveils himself in the crowd.

HITLER (CONTD)
You want to challenge the Fhrer?
Clearly you dont cherish your
life.

DOM
I live my life a quarter mile at a
time, Adolf Hitler.

HITLER
Well Im not certain I know what
that means but consider your
challenge accepted. 2 days from now
we will compete in THE MASTER RACE.

Hitler turns to his head of security, HOSEN, and pulls him

close.

HITLER (CONTD)
That man doesnt leave this rally
alive.

HOSEN
Understood, mein Fhrer.

Dom looks around, he sees a team of Nazis gripping their

weapons. They start to run towards him.

Dom backs out of the crowd and starts to sprint away from the
rally.

** THIS NEXT ACTION SEQUENCE IS SPONSORED ENTIRELY BY

VOLKSWAGEN**

Hosen jumps into his brand new, insanely affordable,

Volkswagen.
 26.

HOSEN (CONTD)
This thing is so spacious, honestly
surprising considering how sporty
it looks on the outside.

Hosen pushes hard on the gas.

HOSEN (CONTD)
The pick up is crazy. I bet this
thing will drive a lot like the
newly re-imagined Passat which
gets nearly 28 MPG on highway.

Dom jumps in another Volkswagen and takes off.

DOM
Wow. These really are finely tuned
machines. And trust me, Im a car
pro. So I know what a good car
is...

Dom starts mowing down Nazis. The bodies of Nazis shatter

across the windshield.

DOM (CONTD)
Incredible durability.

Dom picks up his cell-phone.

DOM (CONTD)
Give me something here guys, I need
you to hack.

INT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - DAY

Ludacris is hacking on his computer. It looks very

complicated and difficult. How did he learn how to do this?

Wasnt his character a common street hustler? Did he study

this in his off hours? Wouldnt the other guys have been
like, Shit, when did you learn coding and stuff? Ah well,
fuck it.

LUDACRIS
Im hacking into their mainframe.

EXT. GERMAN STREETS - DAY

Dom stays on the phone with Ludacris.

DOM
What mainframe its 1941?
 27.

LUDACRIS
I know exactly what you mean!

DOM
What?

LUDACRIS
GO LEFT!

Dom swerves down a tight alleyway.

DOM
Later, Hosen....

Hosen points his gun out the window and shoots at Doms back
tires.

The car skids out. (A Volkswagen normally would never do

this even under extreme circumstances like gun fire, but this
is a movie after all.)

DOM (CONTD)
When youre born in the streets,
you have no choice but to go
home...

Dom takes a Corona bottle from his pocket and sticks it on

top of the gas pedal so the car can keep driving. He leaves
the drivers seat and sneaks out the passenger window.

He Spider-Mans his way out of his own car and sneaks onto the
side of Hosens car.

DOM (CONTD)
Hasta La Vista you German prick.

Dom points his gun at Hosens head. Hosen swerves hard but
Dom holds on. Dom punches Hosen in the face.

Hosens blood shoots all over the Volkswagens upgraded

Vienna leather seats.

HOSEN
This affordable leather came with
the sport package you fucking
monster.

Hosen grabs Dom by the neck. Dom reaches for his gun and...

Dom shoots Hosen at point blank range. The blood and violence
is intense but its coming from an honest place so we can
keep the film PG-13.
 28.

INT. FAST CREW HIDEOUT - CONTINUOUS

LUDACRIS
OH SHIT!

TYRESE
I did NAZI that coming!

Ludacris and Tyrese really laugh at that one.

LUDACRIS
You crazy man!

TYRESE
Youre my best friend.

EXT. STREETS OF GERMANY - DAY

Dom walks into a crowded street covered in Hosens blood.

Letty pulls up and gets out of her car.

LETTY
Dom. Youre okay...

DOM
A man is only as good as his 72
Hemi engine.

LETTY
Yes. I totally agree.

Dom looks at a local bar and sees Brian OConner walk into
it.

DOM
Brian? BRIAN?!

Dom runs through the crowd looking for Brian. He is stopped

by the large crowds, he cant get to Brian.

DOM (CONTD)
Brian?! Where did you go?

Letty catches up with him.

DOM (CONTD)
It was him. I saw him, Letty.

LETTY
Maybe you are just concussed from
the years of head-on collisions.
 29.

DOM
A man is only as good as his 72
Hemi engine.

LETTY
Well you do seem normal. You say
that all the time. If you do have a
concussion maybe you should just
sleep it off.

DOM
Youre right. Youre the best.

LETTY
Lets go back to our hideout in our
0% down APR, 4 door, Sirius/XM
capable, Jetta!

DOM
Sounds great.

Dom gives one final look around for Brian. He doesnt see
him.

** END VOLKSWAGEN SPONSORSHIP **

EXT. NAZI BAR - NIGHT

Hobbs pulls down a propaganda poster of The Perfect Aryan

which is a spitting image of Brian. He brings the poster into
a bar.

INT. NAZI BAR - NIGHT

Hobbs holds the poster up.

HOBBS
Alright ladies, Ill be fast, Im
Looking for this guy.

A group of hardcore Nazis look up and dont like the way

Hobbs is speaking to them.

NAZI BARTENDER
You better get the Hell out of here
American.

HOBBS
You sumbitches want to make me? You
mess with the bullshit you get the
horns covered in corns.
 30.

NAZI BARTENDER
Excuse me?

The bartender looks very confused by that statement, he takes

out a gun and points it at Hobbs.

NAZI BARTENDER (CONTD)

You are about to see my Final
Solution.

HOBBS
Biggest mistake of your life.

Hobbs pulls out a Tank sized machine gun and starts firing it
around the bar. The Nazis start shooting as well.

Bullets bounce off Hobbs by the dozen. Honestly when you have
the health discipline and the drive (no pun intended) of
Dwayne Johnson, you cant be killed. Bullets only make you
stronger.

HOBBS (CONTD)
After I kill all you Nazis. Im
gonna eat a bratwurst with all of
your wives.

The Nazis run towards him.

MANS VOICE
Stop.

Brian OConner walks out from behind the group.

HOBBS
Brian. We came back to rescue you.

Brian stares at Hobbs for a second. He goes to embrace for a

hug...

When Brian is close he pulls out a shotgun and shoots Hobbs

in the chest. His body flies back through the window and onto
the street. A bus hits his body and throws him through the
air onto the pavement.

EXT. NAZI BAR - NIGHT

Hobbs hits the ground hard. He doesnt die though. The Rock
cannot die. Seriously its in his contract.
 31.

INT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - NIGHT

Dom drinks a Corona while Han maps out the route of The
Master Race on his laptop.

HAN
The race goes through the
Brandenburg Gate, up through
Auschwitz...

TYRESE
Auschwitz? AWWW SHIIIITZ.

Dom gets up. He looks distressed. Letty follows him in the

bedroom.

LETTY
You okay?

DOM
I dont like this Hitler guy one
bit. Somethings off about him.

LETTY
You can beat him.

DOM
Hes gonna play dirty. And when you
drive through the mud, your wheels
start to spin...

Letty looks at Dom like poetry is pouring non-stop from his

mouth.

Hans cell phone rings.

HAN
Hello?... Oh shit. Its Hobbs. He
needs us.

INT. HITLERS BEDROOM - NIGHT

Hitler is in what looks like Spanx as he brushes his teeth.

Eva Braun is in bed.

HITLER
Hes going to challenge me?! ME?!
Didnt he read Mein Kempf? I had a
hard life.

EVA BRAUN
Yes Hitler. We know all about YOUR
struggle.
 32.

HITLER
I should be a famous painter. I am
a painter at heart.

Hitler points to a painting he did on the wall which is just

2 stick figures holding balloons.

EVA BRAUN
Yes, Hitler. You are a very good
painter.

HITLER
Damn right I am. I am also a great
leader... We will have sex tonight.

Eva rolls her eyes.

EVA BRAUN
Okay, Hitler. We can try again.

Hitler slowly takes down his Spanx. There is absolutely

nothing that resembles a penis there. I mean not even an
inch. Its basically a little hole he can dribble pee from.

He has shaven a little Hitler mustache in his pubic region.

He lays ontop of Eva and neither of them move.

One second... Two seconds...

HITLER
Did you finish?

EVA BRAUN
Yes, I came.

HITLER
Very good.

Eva pushes Hitler off of her.

EVA BRAUN
You want to try something a little
different tonight?

HITLER
Okay...

Eva flips Hitler on his stomach and slowly starts to reach

her fingers towards his butt.

HITLER (CONTD)
Umm....
 33.

EVA BRAUN
Shhhh. Go with it.

HITLER
I dont think I like... NEIN!!!!!

Eva has many fingers in Hitlers tush.

HITLER (CONTD)
NEIN MEANS NEIN! NEIN MEANS
NEIN!!!!!!

EXT. HITLERS HOUSE - NIGHT

The echo of Hitler being fingered in the ass reverberates

through all of Germany.

INT. GERMAN HOSPITAL - NIGHT

Hobbs is once again laid up in the hospital. This time in a

full body cast. There is a little hole for his mouth. His
tattoos have been re-drawn over the white cast, so you still
know hes bad ass.

HOBBS
It was OConner.

DOM
What are you talking about?

HOBBS
You sumbitch. Im talking about
Brian OConner shooting me at point
blank range.

DOM
Thats impossible.

HOBBS
Yeah well, you cant spell
impossible without possible.

DOM
That is true. But I dont believe
it.

HOBBS
Well believe this. If I ever see
Brian OConner again, I am going to
murder him.
 34.

DOM
You must be mistaken. Brian
wouldn't do that. Maybe they
brainwashed him or something.

A HOT ASS GERMAN NURSE walks into the hospital room.

HOT ASS GERMAN NURSE

Time for your sponge bath Hobbs.

Even though Hobbs is in a full body-cast you still get the

feeling that he is going to have intercourse with this hot
ass German nurse.

INT. DOM TORETTOS CAR - NIGHT

Dom drives down the quiet German streets. Driving helps him
clear his mind.

Dom pulls up to a stop light and a car pulls up next to him.

Dom looks to his left. Its Brian OConner.

DOM
I knew it.

Dom smiles and revs his engine. Brian remains stone-faced; he

revs his engine as well.

DOM (CONTD)
Lets see if you still got it.

The Cars LAUNCH at full speed. 80...90...110 MPH. Wow these

speeds are sick!! I cant believe how Fast and Furious these
dudes can drive.

DOM (CONTD)
Easy now Brian, you got two kids at
home. And a wife.

Brian goes faster and faster. Some would almost says hes
going a little 2 fast and a little 2 furious.

Dom and Brian look at each other while they drive, they dont
bother looking at the road. They dont need to.

Two amazing racers locking eyes, feeling the road, letting

their engines guide them.

They stare at each other for the better part of 15 minutes

while they drive at speeds exceeding 110.

This is what this franchise is all about, superior driving

and superior friendship.
 35.

DOM (CONTD)
Ready to go home?

Brian pulls out a gun and points it at Dom as they drive.

DOM (CONTD)
What the???? Brian what are you
doing?

Dom goes to swerve right and ANOTHER Brian OConner cuts him
off at the intersection.

DOM (CONTD)
2 Brians?.... Ive heard of Twin
turbos but this is ridiculous.

ANOTHER Brian OConner speeds head-on to Dom.

The three Brians trap Dom in an alley, they all drive at him
full speed. Dom is t-boned from both sides and hit with a
head-on collision.

By all means this accident should kill a human being fifty

times over but...

INT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - NIGHT

Dom pulls in, his car only has a slight scratch on it. The
scratch on his head is even smaller.

DOM
We got a problem.

LETTY
Dom, what happened to your head?

DOM
I found Brian.

The team gasps.

DOM (CONTD)
Actually... I found three of em.

TYRESE
Youre not making any sense man.
Maybe you have a concussion. You
should get some rest.

Dom cracks a Corona.

DOM
I know what I saw.
 36.

Ludacris is at the computer hacking something. Seriously, not

one person thinks to question how he knows how to write code
better than any of the worlds greatest hackers?

LUDACRIS
Clones.

TYRESE
Clones? Were you in a car accident
too?

LUDACRIS
I hacked into Hitlers Socialist
Media accounts and found his plans.
They are cloning Brian as the
ultimate Aryan. Thats why he is on
the posters. Pretty soon ALL of
Germany will be filled with Brians.

DOM
Thats one big-ass family to take
care of... So wheres the real
Brian?

LUDACRIS
Hes being held hostage in Hitlers
private quarters.

INT. HITLERS PRISON BASEMENT - NIGHT

The REAL Brian OConner sits behind a cell by himself.

Eva Braun brings him a tuna sandwich.

BRIAN OCONNER
Thanks.

EVA BRAUN
No problem.

Eva walks away slowly.

BRIAN OCONNER
You dont have to stay with him you
know.

EVA BRAUN
Oh yeah? You gonna take me away
from all this?

BRIAN OCONNER
I could. Im from the future.
 37.

Eva comes back and sits closely to Brians cell.

EVA BRAUN
Whats so good about the future?

BRIAN OCONNER
Well for starters, theres this
movie called Meet the Parents
where Ben Stiller tries to get his
in-laws to like him but he keeps
screwing up.

Eva laughs at the thought of this. She gets really close to

the cell bars and in Brians face.

EVA BRAUN
Tell me more of this... Ben
Stiller.

BRIAN OCONNER
Oh hes hilarious. He gets angry
and like all irritated ALL the
time.

EVA BRAUN
Sounds like another funny little
man I know, Adolf Hitler.

BRIAN OCONNER
Youre too good for him...

Brian and Eva lock eyes. Something is happening here. Is a

love brewing? Could be. Guess we will wait and find out.

Hitler screams from upstairs.

HITLER (O.S.)
EVA, time for you to grab my
Schnitzel.

EVA BRAUN
I have to go... He doesnt have a
penis so I put fingers in his ass.

BRIAN OCONNER
Makes sense.

Brian watches Eva leave. He feels something for her.

Something he hasnt felt in a long, long time.

INT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - MORNING

Dom lectures his crew.

 38.

DOM
There is a new order. The Master
Race is tomorrow. Today we focus on
rescuing Brian.

LETTY
Whats the plan?

DOM
Ill distract Hitler for the day.
Letty you go to Hitlers quarters
and see if you can find OConner.
Han, map out tomorrows course and
you other clowns, go check on Hobbs
and see if he is okay. We need the
whole team if we plan on bringing
down Hitlers regime.

LUDACRIS
Damn! Who woulda thought, a bunch
of car racing street thugs would
eventually take down Adolf Hitler!

Tyrese runs in holding his phone to the ceiling.

TYRESE
Anyone know the WIFI password here?

LUDACRIS
Its 1941.

Tyrese types into his phone.

TYRESE
1941 didnt work.

Ludacris shakes his head as if to say no I meant 1941 is the

year you stupid asshole. Therefore there is no WIFI. These
two guys are the modern day Abbott and Costello!!

EXT. GERMAN RACE TRACK - DAY

Hitler sits in his car. He speaks to DU HAST, his new head of

security and mechanic.

HITLER
These are the Nuremburg Trial
races. Today we will see how fast I
can push my Volkswagen and what
changes need to be made for The
Master Race.
 39.

DU HAST
Okay. I will time you.

Hitler stares into the distance, pondering.

HITLER
You ever just sit and wonder what
life would be like if people knew
the real you. The sensitive dude
who loves to talk about emotion and
wants nothing more than to get lost
in a great romance novel?

DU HAST
No.

HITLER
Me neither. Never once. Lets race.

The skies are grey and filled with clouds. The Gods know
something terrible is about to happen.

DU HAST
Okay, but we shouldnt spend too
long out here. Its going to rain
and it may even hail, Hitler.

HITLER
Im pretty sure I can handle
driving around a race track by
myself.

DOM
What about with someone else?

Dom appears next to Hitler. Its kind of weird that they

didnt hear him drive up.

Du Hast pulls a gun on Dom.

HITLER
Nein. Let him race. Lets see what
hes got.

A gentle rain starts to come down on the cars. Dom sniffs the
air like an animal.

DOM
I think a storm is brewing.
Sometimes you gotta drive in the
rain to park in the sunshine...

Dom revs his engine. So does Hitler.

 40.

Du Hast shoots a gun in the air and the two cars take off.
The rain starts to come down heavier. The two cars are neck
and neck roaring through the track.

INT. HITLERS PRISON BASEMENT - DAY

Eva Braun and Brian OConner sit inside Brians cell,

dangerously close to each other. They are laughing
hysterically.

BRIAN OCONNER
And then Robert Deniro is like
Its the circle of trust, Focker!

Eva cries laughing.

EVA BRAUN
The future sounds so... carefree.

BRIAN OCONNER
It is. I wish you could see it.

EVA BRAUN
So do I...

Eva and Brian get very close to kissing. Brian pulls away.

BRIAN OCONNER
I cant. Im sorry. Im married. I
have two kids.

EVA BRAUN
I get it. I totally understand...
Do you think maybe we can just have
like no strings attached sex. I
need this. When I say Hitler
literally has no penis, Im not
exaggerating or trying to be a
bitch.

Brian serious contemplates this offer.

BRIAN OCONNER
Ugh... I cant sorry. I love Mia
too much.

EVA BRAUN
Youre a good guy. I hope Mia knows
that...

An ALARM starts to blare through the downstairs area. Eva

gets up and locks the cell. She runs upstairs.
 41.

INT. HITLERS MAIN ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Eva runs upstairs and sees 70+ Nazis on the floor either dead
or on the verge of death.

EVA BRAUN
What the fuck?

LETTY
Im here for Brian.

EVA BRAUN
Over my dead body.

LETTY
That can be arranged...

Eva and Letty run at each other full speed. They both go
airborne and hold their fists out like some real Mortal
Kombat shit. Its awesome.

The girls quickly recover and start old school Jiu-Jitsu

fighting. They go punch for punch. Kick for kick. Uppercut
for uppercut!

PLEASE LET THERE BE A NIP-SLIP. PLEASE LET THERE BE A NIP-

SLIP!!!

Holy shit, cars, explosions and two chicks in a cat-fight.

CAN YOU FUCKING believe this shit?! Lets take a moment to
celebrate just how fucking sick this franchise is. I dont
know about you at home but Ive been fully hard since I
started writing this thing.

EVA BRAUN
You Bitch!

LETTY
Takes one to know one.

Letty high-kicks Eva in the boobs!!!

Evas shirt rips open. Not bad for a Nazi sympathizer... Not
bad at all...

Eva takes out a boomerang shaped like a Swastika and throws

it at Lettys head.

Letty takes out the cross necklace Dom gave her and wraps it
around Evas neck. She chokes her hard.

LETTY (CONTD)
GO WITH CHRIST. GO WITH HIM!
 42.

INT. GERMAN HOSPITAL - DAY

Tyrese and Ludacris sit around Hobbs who is still in a full

body cast.

LUDACRIS
(to himself)
Cadillac grills, Cadillac mills,
check out the oil my Cadillac
spills...

HOBBS
American cars. Gotta love it.
Whats more American than a
Cadillac, a BBQ and feeling the
bones of your enemies crunch under
your Samoan palms?

TYRESE
Awww, Hell Yeah!

LUDACRIS
We need you out there Hobbs. Some
weird shit going down.

HOBBS
I dont know when Im going to be
fixed. I just dont have the
motivation.

TYRESE
Oh you need motivation to get
better?

Tyrese and Ludacris nod at each other like we know what to

do.

TYRESE (CONTD)
Hitler was saying that you probably
only put two scoops of Creatine in
your cereal in the morning.

Hobbs starts to uncomfortably adjust.

HOBBS
Stupid asshole. Guy doesnt know
what hes talking about. Hes
talking out of school and Im the
principal.

LUDACRIS
He also said that he thinks all
your tattoos are Henna because the
real tats make you cry.
 43.

Hobbs tries to stand up in his body-cast.

HOBBS
(enraged)
I cried one time and it was because
I already had a bruise where the
tattoo was going. It hurt like a
bastard.

TYRESE
Yeah and also he said he heard for
a fact that you drive a Prius.

That is the final straw. The hospital bed starts to shake.

Hobbs gets off the bed despite his cast and starts to
convulse while standing.

LUDACRIS
Oh shit!

TYRESE
Nurse! Someone help!

Hobbs flexes, a crackle starts to happen, the body-cast

begins to split like the ground during Dwaynes other great
film San Andreas.

Hobbs Incredible Hulks out of the entire body cast. He looks

great. Better than ever.

HOBBS
Now lets go kill some
motherfucking Nazis.

EXT. RACETRACK - DAY

Dom and Hitler are racing at full speed around the track.

DOM
Heres the thing. When someone
messes with my family... I dont
let it SLIDE.

Dom Tokyo drifts his car around the first bend and cuts off
Hitler.

HITLER
Sliding into me during a race? What
kind of morals do you have?

Rock sized hail stones start pouring from the sky, crashing
onto the cars.
 44.

DOM
What did you do to Brian? Why is he
mean now?

Dom flips his car around and starts to drive fully in

reverse. There is no reason for this except it looks cool as
shit.

Dom and Hitler are driving neck and neck. Dom takes out a
kite and holds it up over Hitlers car.

Dom nods at the sky, like he is one with God and they have a
personal connection.

The Sky shoots out a bolt of lightening and it connects fully

with the kite attached to Hitlers car.

The car bursts into flames and Hitler jumps out the window
just in time.

DOM (CONTD)
They say lightening doesnt strike
twice... Lets hope theyre wrong.

Dom races off into the night.

DOM (CONTD)
See you at the race tomorrow.

Hitler writhes in pain on the ground.

INT. HITLERS PRISON BASEMENT - DAY

Letty stole the key ring from Eva Braun and has made her way
down to the prison cell where Brian is.

BRIAN OCONNER
Letty. You made it.

Letty starts to unlock the cell.

EVA BRAUN
Almost. She almost made it.

Eva cocks a gun and points it at Lettys head. Letty slowly

backs away.

BRIAN OCONNER
Eva please. This is your chance to
set things right. Let me go
peacefully. When I get back to the
future I will send you the entire
Fockers box set.
 45.

Eva is emotionally distraught. She doesnt know what to do.

EVA BRAUN
Im scared, Brian.

BRIAN OCONNER
Youre stronger than this. A man
doesnt define who you are.

EVA BRAUN
I dont know if I can let you go...

BRIAN OCONNER
Remember I told you about how Ben
Stiller in Along Came Polly
figured out that to truly love you
must truly let it all go...

EVA BRAUN
Youre right.

Eva unlocks the cell herself and opens the gate for Brian.

EVA BRAUN (CONTD)

Im gonna miss you.

Eva plants a kiss on Brians lips.

EVA BRAUN (CONTD)

Last chance for sex.

BRIAN OCONNER
No thank you.

Eva lets Brian and Letty go free.

INT. GERMAN HOSPITAL - DAY

Ludacris, Tyrese and Hobbs are leaving the hospital. The

nurses dont understand how Hobbs is walking around.

HOT ASS GERMAN NURSE

Hobbs, you werent supposed to be
out of here for another 6 months.

HOBBS
Pain is just weakness leaving the
body, sweetheart.

HOT ASS GERMAN NURSE

Yes but almost every bone in your
body was broken.
 46.

HOBBS
Sure... except for one very
important bone...

Hobbs winks at the Hot Ass German Nurse. She blushes.

HOT ASS GERMAN NURSE

Time for one more extra special
sponge bath?

HOBBS
Always time for that.

Hobbs pulls Tyrese and Ludacris aside and whispers to them.

HOBBS (CONTD)
Shes talking about sex. Were
gonna have it.

LUDACRIS
Dope!

Hobbs, Luda and Tyrese do a 3-way bro fist bump then Hobbs
goes off to have sex.

EXT. HITLERS HOUSE - NIGHT

Hitler walks up to his house all disheveled, wet from the

rain, and looking defeated.

HITLER
(ranting to himself)
I hate lightening. No, Ill do you
one better I hate Mother Nature. I
also hate when you wash your hands
but theres no paper towels so you
touch the door knob wet but people
think its pee on your hand...

Suddenly a metal Swastika hits him the head.

HITLER (CONTD)
What the Hell?!

Hitler looks up and Eva Braun is throwing all his stuff onto
the front lawn.

HITLER (CONTD)
Nein! Stop that.

EVA BRAUN
I want you out of here Adolf. Im
sick of this life.
 47.

She throws down a number of his paintings, uniforms and large

hats.

HITLER
My painting of a baby calf eating
an ice cream cone!

A small trophy hits the ground.

HITLER (CONTD)
Not my Wrttemberg little league
trophy, PLEASE! STOP!

The neighbors start to come out of the house. Hitler has to

pretend he is still tough to save face in front of the
people.

HITLER (CONTD)
(pretending)
Yes. Very good! Spring cleaning...
Get rid of anything I dont need so
we can save room for... More evil
stuff like bombs and... workout
tools... Tough guy stuff... Thank
you for doing this for me.

Eva is at the window with Hitlers prized toy Volkswagen. He

pleads with her.

HITLER (CONTD)
Please! Not that! You couldnt be
so cruel.

Eva throws the car out the window and Hitler catches it. He
runs inside.

INT. HITLERS HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Eva starts to walk out of the house.

EVA BRAUN
By the way hes gone.

HITLER
Who?

EVA BRAUN
Brian OConner.

HITLER
WHAT?! How did he escape?!
 48.

EVA BRAUN
I let him go. And another thing. I
had sex with him. Many times. I
want a divorce, Adolf.

Eva tosses Hitler divorce papers.

HITLER
(mimicking her voice)
I want a divorce Adolf thats
exactly what you sound like devil-
woman. Spot on impression I just
did. Well too bad. You arent
getting a divorce.

EVA BRAUN
Very mature.

HITLER
(mimicking)
Very mature. Thats twice I just
roasted your ass.

Eva shakes her head in embarrassment.

HITLER (CONTD)
Tell me one thing. How was it
having your fingers in another
mans ass.

EVA BRAUN
No fingers. Just sex. Regular
style.

Hitler starts to dry heave.

EVA BRAUN (CONTD)

Bye Hitler. You fingers in the
booty ass bitch.

Eva walks out. Hitler calls up to his security.

HITLER
Du Hast! We have important business
to handle.

INT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - NIGHT

Han, Dom and Ludacris stand around Han as he simulates THE

MASTER RACE route on his laptop.
 49.

HAN
Okay, I called in two of the best
racers in Tokyo to simulate the
race. This will give us a chance to
see exactly how the road plays out
in racing conditions.

DOM
Fantastic. Who are the drivers?

HAN
Jimmy Hu and Lee Watts.

LUDACRIS
Damn! Jimmy Hu, Ive heard of that
guy. Hes talented.

The live feed of the race starts on Hans laptop. Jimmy Hu

immediately takes the lead.

Tyrese walks in as the race starts.

TYRESE
Oh Shit! Whos in first?

LUDACRIS
Thats right, Hus in first.

TYRESE
Thats what am I asking.

LUDACRIS
Hus in first, Watts in second.

TYRESE
I dont know, youve been watching
the whole time, not me!

THERE IS A CLASSIC misunderstanding going on here and I for

one am loving it!

TYRESE (CONTD)
WHOS in first place right now?

LUDACRIS
RIGHT! Hus in first!

TYRESE
Whats the guys name in 1st place?

LUDACRIS
No, Watts is in second place!
 50.

TYRESE
You son of a bitch!

Tyrese and Ludacris start slap-boxing. I told you they were

the modern day Abbott and Costello, I fucking told you.

Hobbs comes running in all frantic.

HOBBS
The DeLorean. Its gone.

Dom gets down on one knee and sniffs the tire tracks.

DOM
Sometimes to drive to the future,
you need to brake in the past...

BRIAN OCONNER
Where do you think hes going?

HOBBS
I have a bad feeling.

INT. DOMS HOUSE - PRESENT DAY

Hitler walks into Doms house looking for Mia. He studies the
house and the future.

He picks up an iPad and starts playing Angry Birds on it.

HITLER
Boy, are these birds angry or
what?!

A television is left on in the living room. Donald Trump is

once again publicly speaking.

ANGLE ON TV:

DONALD TRUMP
Global warming was invented in a
think tank by the Chinese, the
Mexicans and probably some sort of
low IQd disgusting Vietnamese
people.

ANGLE ON LIVING ROOM:

Hitler grabs his collar, he feels uncomfortable.

HITLER
Yikes. He really went there.
 51.

DONALD TRUMP (O.S.)

I think helping the poor and hungry
is basically a disaster. I wont do
it. Thats just me.

ANGLE ON TV:

DONALD TRUMP (CONTD)

I am now announcing my Vice
President to be... My penis, its
strong-willed, handsome and
absolutely wont take no for an
answer under any circumstance! As a
child they tried to circumcise me
and I peed in the doctors face. I
said you better take your fat-ass
hands and get them away from my
huge stick. That was me at one
years old. I was a very, very
successful baby.

ANGLE ON LIVING ROOM:

HITLER
This guy is a monster. But he knows
how to make a speech. I need to
take some notes from that.

Hitler shuts off the television.

MIA
Excuse me, who are you?

Hitler turns around and smiles.

HITLER
We are going to go on a little
trip...

Mia throws a punch at Hitler, her arm is caught by Du Hast.

Little Jack runs up and stabs Hitler with his Spark Plug.
Hitler grabs Little Jack.

MIA
Jack no!

HITLER
Dont worry little boy, you will
soon see your father again.
 52.

INT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - NIGHT

Dom and Brian sit by themselves and drink a Corona.

BRIAN OCONNER
I knew youd be here to save me.

DOM
You never turn your back on family,
even if you are in a tight space
and the only way to get out of that
tight space is to turn around, then
you should still keep your back
facing your family and never turn
it. Ever.

BRIAN OCONNER
Im worried about Mia.

DOM
Hitler wouldnt dare. Hes crazy,
but hes not suicidal.

BRIAN OCONNER
I hope youre right. God... Shes
such a great mama, Mia.

DOM
I know she is.

BRIAN OCONNER
How are the kids?

DOM
I been looking after them. Teaching
little Jack to drive a Dodge
Charger.

BRIAN OCONNER
American made? Bullshit! No way any
son of mine would drive an American
made car.

DOM
Look I gave him the keys on his
third birthday and he didnt
protest.

BRIAN OCONNER
Unreal.
 53.

DOM
He actually ended up driving all
the way to the Bank of America on
Western before he totalled the
thing.

BRIAN OCONNER
Amazing... Cant believe I missed
his first drive.

DOM
I got it on tape. Well so did most
of the LA news crews. It was a
pretty big deal in our town for a
few months.

BRIAN OCONNER
Ive missed so much.

Han comes running in.

HAN
Guys, you are gonna want to see
this.

EXT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - NIGHT

The DeLorean has been returned. The spark plug that Dom gave
little Jack is sitting on the dashboard of the car.

DOM
Guess I mis-judged you Hitler. I
guess you do have a death wish.

BRIAN OCONNER
Whats the next step?

DOM
Race is tomorrow at 9 am. Im gonna
beat Hitler, end the Nazi
occupation, rescue Mia and the
kids, and be home in time to finish
grilling the perfect Toretto
burger.

BRIAN OCONNER
If you do that, Ill volunteer to
say Grace!

Dom and Brian laugh together. They understand each other.

When two troubled kids come from the streets, all they really
have is the bond between friends.
 54.

DOM
One more thing though, I need the
right car for this race... Im
going back to the future.

Dom walks over to the DeLorean. The Back To The Future

theme music starts blasting from the car.

Dom looks over at Tyrese.

TYRESE
What?! I thought it was the
appropriate music for this.

DOM
You crazy, man!

INT. DELOREAN TIME MACHINE - NIGHT

Dom sets the year for 2016 and presses the gas.

The car flies out of the hideout. Dom presses the NOS button.

The DeLorean shoots through the space-time continuum. It

propels into the future.

Dom tries to hit the brake but... THE BRAKES ARE CUT.

DOM
Oh shit. No brakes. Well-played,
Hitler.

The DeLorean shoots full speed past all time and cultures.
The years, events and decades fly by Dom.

EXT. WOODSTOCK 69 - DAY

Dom plows through a crowd of people at Woodstock while Jimi

Hendrix plays.

DOM
Hendrix. Love that guy.

EXT. THE GRASSY KNOLL - DAY

Dom passes the grassy knoll on the day Kennedy was

assassinated.

The bullet that was meant for JFK is taken by the DeLorean
when Dom speeds past JFKs car. JFK LIVES!
 55.

The crowd doesnt know what just happened. Cops descend on

Lee Harvey Oswald.

INT. PARAMOUNT STUDIO LOT - NIGHT

Dom passes through a Hollywood set in the 60s where he sees

them faking the moon landing.

DOM
Damn. Ive seen too much. SOMEBODY
STOP THIS THING!!!!

EXT. WOODSTOCK 99 - DAY

Dom passes through Woodstock 99 plowing through a crowd of

people.

DOM
Limp Bizkit. Love those guys!

EXT. THE TWIN TOWERS - DAY

The DeLorean is now airborne. It propels through space on

September 11th, 2001 in New York City.

Dom eyes the terrorist planes coming for the towers, there is
an intensity in his eyes.

DOM
You terrorists caught Toretto on
the wrong day.

Dom cranks the wheel and SLAMS his DeLorean into the first
plane that was aiming for the towers.

The plane spirals out and falls full speed to the ground
completely missing the tower.

Doms DeLorean goes through the top floor of the Twin Towers
and shoots out the window to the other tower just as the 2nd
plane is approaching.

DOM (CONTD)
Playing chicken with a jet... You
gotta understand something
terrorists, America is my biggest
extended family. And I love
family...
 56.

Dom makes eye contact with the terrorist thats flying the
second plane. The DeLorean continues to propel full speed
without brakes.

The DeLorean busts OUT the window for a head-on collision

with the second 9/11 terrorist plane. Dom crashes into the
head of the plane, diverts the attack and is ejected from the
DeLorean.

Before Dom flies totally out of the DeLorean he grabs the

Flux Capacitor out of the front dash.

Dom Toretto flies through the air. He just stopped 9/11 but
he is not willing to die yet.

As he flails through the air he feels the warm embrace of a

man bigger than himself, it is ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER, as THE
TERMINATOR.

THE TERMINATOR
Come with me if you want to live.

EXT. DOMS HOUSE - PRESENT DAY

The Terminator and Dom come through a time travel portal into
Doms front yard. If youve ever seen the Terminator you
would know that when they time travel they arrive naked.

Dom and The Terminator stand in the front yard completely

naked. They feel awkward.

DOM
Im totally comfortable with this.

THE TERMINATOR
Me too. Happens all the time.

Dom looks at the Terminators crotch.

DOM
Little chilly?

THE TERMINATOR
No. I tuck it back for time travel.

DOM
Got ya... Well thanks.

THE TERMINATOR
No problem.

The Terminator disappears in a time portal.

 57.

Dom makes his way over to his garage.

INT. DOMS GARAGE - NIGHT

Dom pulls a Corona from his fridge and takes the cover off
his 1970 Dodge Charger R/T. He is still completely nude.

DOM
My first love... Time to make one
more customization.

Dom takes the Flux Capacitor and installs it onto the dash of
the Charger.

INT. HITLERS GARAGE - NIGHT

Hitler is putting the finishing touches on his Volkswagen for

the morning race.

Eva walks out of the house with her suitcases.

HITLER
You know I am the child of a broken
home. I believe very strongly in
the sanctity of marriage.

EVA BRAUN
You are a murderer.

HITLER
I AM A PAINTER.

EVA BRAUN
And you have that little mustache.

HITLER
Oh, all of a sudden size matters?

EVA BRAUN
It has always mattered Adolf. It
has always mattered.

Eva kisses Hitler on the cheek and walks out. A single tear
forms in Adolfs eye. He pulls out the toy Volkswagen he was
given as a child.

HITLER
The only thing that matters is a
mans car.
 58.

INT. HITLERS PRISON BASEMENT - NIGHT

Mia sits awake as her two children sleep. Hitler makes his
way to the cell. He quickly fixes his hair in the mirror
before going down there.

HITLER
Everything comfortable?

MIA
You took me back in time and put me
in a small prison cell.

HITLER
No need to be rude... You know...
Your husband and my wife ended
up... Doing stuff together.

MIA
That isnt true.

HITLER
So if you wanted to maybe try some
stuff to get back at them, I
wouldnt really be opposed to it.

MIA
No thanks.

HITLER
Right... Dont know what I was
thinking. I hate Americans!!!
Ughh... Awkward... Im gonna go.

MIA
Bye.

HITLER
Bye. All that stuff I just said
earlier was a joke. All of it. Bye
again!

INT. HITLERS MAIN ROOM - NIGHT

Hitler runs up stairs embarrassed and in a fit of rage, he

grabs one of the clone Brian OConners.

HITLER
Go downstairs and tell that woman
that she should be nicer to me. And
find out where those guys hideout
is.
 59.

EXT. HITLERS PRISON BASEMENT - NIGHT

The clone Brian OConner walks downstairs towards the cell

where Mia is being held.

MIA
Brian?

CLONE BRIAN
Mia? Yes it is me, Clone Brian... I
mean... shit... Its me Brian. Just
Brian. None of that other stuff I
said before Brian.

Mia seems confused.

MIA
Why did you call yourself Clone
Brian?

CLONE BRIAN
Freudian slip!

MIA
What do you mean?

CLONE BRIAN
Look Mia, Im not a clone. But you
should be nicer to Hitler and tell
me where Dom is hiding.

MIA
I dont think so. If you are the
real Brian, what do you always say
to me right before we go to bed?

Clone Brian thinks hard.

CLONE BRIAN
Cars are really awesome and I like
going fast.

Mia is impressed but still skeptical.

MIA
Okay, you got that right. One more
thing... When is little Jacks
birthday.

Clone Brian tries to rack his brain, nothing comes up.

MIA (CONTD)
Thats what I thought. You arent
the real Brian.
 60.

CLONE BRIAN
How did you know?

MIA
When you love someone, they look at
you a certain way...

EXT. ARMY BASE - NIGHT

Hobbs drives at full speed towards a deserted army base.

He has a built in blender in his HUMMER that cooks up the

perfect protein shake.

Hobbs adds an entire tub of protein powder, a full steak, 40

egg whites and a few granola bars.

He puts a little left over protein on a key and does a bump

like cocaine.

HOBBS
Daddy is gonna kill some Nazi scum.

INT. OLD DESERTED ARMY HUT - NIGHT

Hobbs sits across from someone...

HOBBS
So thats it. Well need your help
tomorrow if we want to bring these
sumbitches down.

A shadowy head nods yes as smoke billows from a cigar.

HOBBS (CONTD)
I knew I could count on you.

EXT. THE BRANDENBURG GATE - DAY

The day is upon us. All of Germany is gathered around to

watch THE MASTER RACE.

Hitler is on a podium. He seems newly invigorated, lively,

and fired up after seeing Trumps speech.

HITLER
German people. I am the best. The
best to ever do it. I am smart. I
am rich. And I have a really HUGE
HUGE penis.
 61.

The crowd FUCKING LOVES IT. This is the Hitler they voted
into office before he lost all his confidence.

HITLER (CONTD)
Eva Braun is a pig and disgusting
inside and out. I am back on the
market and looking for a screw-
partner while I run this great
country and soon, the world!

The ladies in the crowd go wild. They throw their bras and
panties on the stage.

HITLER (CONTD)
So before we race just know that
when I win this race not only am I
a great daredevil, but also super
rich and have a very large penis
that should be celebrated. Thank
you all.

Hitlers hair is starting to get wispy and unkempt, a lot

like Donald Trump.

Hitler gets off the podium to much celebration. He jumps into

his Volkswagen.

Hitler and Dom are lined up at the starting line. Each of

them rev their engines.

At the crux of this franchise is engine noises, I mean the

rumble just gets the fucking people off. That deep, burly,
sensational grit you get from a custom built 72. Its that
sort of rumble that gets you thinking... What if I left it
all behind? My wife. My kids. Fixed up the old Mustang and
drove it to La Paz, Mexico... Anyway, just a thought... Back
to the movie!

HITLER (CONTD)
Feels like a good day for you to
die doesnt it?

DOM
I heard you like fingers in your
ass.

Hitler gets bright red in the face. He leans over to the

passenger side of his Volkswagen and slowly, awkwardly rolls
up the manual crank window so Dom cant talk to him anymore.

Hitler signals for Du Hast to come over to his window.

DU HAST
Yes, mein Fhrer?
 62.

HITLER
Under no circumstances does he end
this race alive. Do whatever it
takes.

DU HAST
Understood. We already have a plan
in place...

INT. NAZI PALACE - DAY

Hundreds of Brian OConner clones start to file out of the

palace.

Totally in unison all the clones reach into their pockets and
take out a set of keys.

Each of them approach their own Mercedes G-Wagon.

500 Brian OConners behind the wheels of cars? OH SHIT.

EXT. THE BRANDENBURG GATE - DAY

Dom looks into the crowd and sees MIA with the two kids being
held at gun point by Du Hast.

DU HAST
Bereit. Set. Gehen!!!! (READY. SET.
GO!)

A pistol shoots in the air. Dom and Hitler take off through
the Brandenburg gate.

Hitler flies past Dom. Dom presses his NOS button but nothing
happens.

DOM
What the???

Hitler holds up a NOS tank.

HITLER
GOT YOUR NOS!!!!!!!

INT. FAST TEAM HIDEOUT - DAY

Hobbs stands around giving a speech to the gang.

 63.

HOBBS
Under no circumstance do we let
that sumbitch get to the finish
line and get to those nuclear
weapon codes. If we do its the end
of existence as we know it.

LUDACRIS
Theres no way that dude can beat
Dom.

HOBBS
And to make absolutely certain of
that... Ive invited some friends
to help us.

Hobbs opens the garage. A humongous TANK pulls forward. The

top pops up.

SYLVESTER STALLONE, pops out of the top, smoking a cigar.

SYLVESTER STALLONE
Any room for some Expendables?

The rest of the Expendables start pouring out of the tank,

Dolph Lundgren, Arnold, Terry Crews, Randy Couture, CT from
the Real World/Road Rules Challenge and Mel Gibson...

HOBBS
Mel. Surprised to see you here.

MEL GIBSON
Why?

HOBBS
You want to HELP us defeat the
Nazis? And save the Jewish
people?... Just seems sort of...
Out of character.

MEL GIBSON
I hear ya. I need to fix my public
image though.

HOBBS
Got it. Youre in.

EXT. GERMANY STREETS - DAY

Dom manages to catch up to Hitler.

DOM
American Muscle, gotta love it.
 64.

As Dom passes an alley, a group of Mercedes G-Wagons start to

pour out of it. They follow Dom closely.

DOM (CONTD)
Looks like we got company.

All the Brian OConner clones drive the G-Wagons. They pass a
street sign that says Gas. Schnitzel King. And Auschwitz
Concentration Camp: next exit.

The dozens of OConner clones form a Swastika with their cars

and descend towards Dom.

Hitler is gaining the lead.

DOM (CONTD)
(on walkie)
If you guys get a minute, I might
need some backup.

HOBBS
Were on it.

EXT. AUSCHWITZ CONCENTRATION CAMP - DAY

The Expendables tank crashes through the gate of Auschwitz.

An alarm starts to blare around the camp.

A team of Nazis run towards them but every last Nazi piece of
shit dies at the hands and bullets of the Expendables.

Terry Crews puts bullets in-between his pecs and flexes. The
bullets shoot out at machine gun speeds. Pound for pound this
is probably the most muscular movie of all time.

As Stallone and the gang mow down Nazis, Mel Gibson sets up a
table filled with automatic weapons.

All the Jewish people who have now been freed are encouraged
to go grab a gun.

Mel hands a Jewish man a machine gun.

MEL GIBSON
Sorry about everything.

JEWISH PERSON #1
No problem.

Mel hands another few people guns.

 65.

MEL GIBSON
Sorry.

JEWISH PERSON #2
All good.

Mel continues handing out guns to Jews and apologizing till

every Jewish man, woman and child is armed at Auschwitz.

EXT. THE ROAD TO AUSCHWITZ - CONTINUOUS

Hitler and Dom speed towards Auschwitz. Dom shifts and

presses on the gas with everything he has.

He looks up like Ray Liotta in Goodfellas and sees two

German army planes above him.

DOM
Bombs away, boys.

The helicopters start to drop bombs over Doms car. Dom

SWERVES past one bomb and another bomb. They cant catch him.

As Dom speeds down the road he avoids a trail of bombs being

dropped on him. He smiles at Hitler.

A BOMB hits the front end of Doms car and starts to flip the
car in the air. One flip... Two flips... Three flips...

As Dom is tumbling through the air in his car, he catches

eyes with Hitler and mimics putting fingers in an ass.

The gate to Auschwitz is close... Doms car flies through it.

The car rights itself and keeps driving.

Hitler and Dom crash through Auschwitz and race down the dirt
path.

Stallone holds his hand up telling everyone to cease fire.

SYLVESTER STALLONE
We let them race.

As the army of Brian OConner clones follows behind them

Sylvester Stallone nods his head now.

The Expendables, The Fast Team and all the Jewish people
UNLOAD their weapons on the G-Wagons.

Cars Explode, bodies fly, the stench of gun powder fills the
entire country. ALL THE NAZIS ARE FUCKING DEAD.

THIS IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER FUCKING MADE. FUCK YES!!!!!!!!!!!

 66.

Dom and Hitler are neck and neck, almost towards the end of
Auschwitz and nearing the end of the race.

Dom pulls close to Hitlers car and bumps him.

HITLER
Nein!

Dom bumps him again.

HITLER (CONTD)
Stop! This isnt in the rule book.
Play fair!

Dom continues to bump Hitlers car, pushing him towards a

building.

THE FINISH LINE IS IN SIGHT. ALL OF GERMANY IS WATCHING THIS

RACE. THE NUCLEAR WARHEADS AND CODES ARE IN THE DISTANCE.

DOM
If you want to drive Fast then you
better GAS IT...

HITLER
What do these metaphors mean?!!

Dom pulls his E-brake and does a final slam into Hitlers car
which spirals Hitler into the Auschwitz gas chamber.

Hitler flies into the large gas chamber room.

The real Brian OConner runs up behind the chamber and locks
Hitler inside.

Dom runs to the gas knob and turns it on high.

As Brian pumps gas into the chamber ending Hitlers life he

sees Eva Braun in the crowd, he smiles at her as she gives
him a thumbs up.

INT. GAS CHAMBER - CONTINUOUS

Hitler sits in his Volkswagen alone in the gas chamber as gas

starts to pump in. He holds up his toy car.

HITLER
Ill keep you safe.

Hitler unbuckles his pants and shoves the toy car up his ass.

HITLER (CONTD)
And with that, I am ready to die.
 67.

The gas continues to leak into the room.

EXT. GAS CHAMBER - CONTINUOUS

Stallone finishes up his cigar.

STALLONE
I think were done here.

Stallone throws his cigar on top of the gas tank. The entire
building bursts into flames.

All of the German people cheer that Hitlers reign has

finally ended.

They end up choosing Dolph Lundgren as their new leader. He

is a just leader and treats the people right.

Mia and the kids are free and run up to Brian. Eva Braun is
also awkwardly standing around.

BRIAN OCONNER
Mia, Id like you to meet Eva...
She was the one feeding me tuna
sandwiches while I was captured.

MIA
He loves his tuna.

EVA BRAUN
He certainly does.

Mia and Eva stare at each other coldly.

EVA BRAUN (CONTD)

Youve got a great man, treat him
right or I might just come to the
future and have a Ben Stiller movie
marathon with him.

MIA
Umm Okay? Thanks.

Eva walks away. Brian picks up Jack.

BRIAN OCONNER
Hey buddy! I heard uncle Dom was
teaching you to drive?

JACK
Yes sir! Although the piece of shit
alternator on the Charger kept
busting out on us.
 68.

BRIAN OCONNER
Thats my boy!

DOM
What do you say we go back to the
future?!

The family cheers and piles into the time traveling Dodge.

EXT. DOMS HOUSE - PRESENT DAY

The entire Fast and Furious gang sits around the BBQ and
celebrates what they just did.

TYRESE
So I said to that dude, Ive heard
about Mein Kempf but I need to get
back to MEIN KEMPFORTABLE COUCH!

DOM
Hey Brian, remember when I told you
that you owe me 10 second car?

BRIAN OCONNER
Yep.

DOM
Well now I think you owe me a Nein
second car!

Brian laughs!

BRIAN OCONNER
You got it! So. Where to next?

DOM
Relax Brian...

Dom nods to his Dodge Charger which he converted into a time

machine.

DOM (CONTD)
We got all the TIME in the world!

The gang cheers and digs into their meal. Tyrese grabs the
first burger.

DOM (CONTD)
First one to touch the food says
grace!
 69.

TYRESE
Dear Lord, I am thankful that we
defeated the Nazis, stopped 9/11
from happening and most of all...
Im thankful for big booty bitches!

Everyone laughs and digs into their food! Until next time
folks...

THE END OR IS IT?

 70.

POST CREDIT SCENE

EXT. DOMS HOUSE - NIGHT

The Fast Family is still around the BBQ. Suddenly a cold wind
starts to blow, their hair starts to fly around... Something
is landing around them...

Descending through the clouds is the HELICARRIER from the

Avengers films. It lands on the street in front of the Fast
crew.

NICK FURY, pops out of the carrier. Dom grabs his gun.

NICK FURY
Take it easy, I do come in peace.

DOM
What do you want.

NICK FURY
I heard about your last mission. We
are looking for some drivers to go
into the future.

DOM
Whos we?

The AVENGERS appear to come out of the ship.

IRON MAN
Loved your work stopping 9/11 man.
Really exemplary stuff.

NICK FURY
We have big problems. In 2025 as
Donald Trump is finishing his 2nd
term as president he meets up with
Ultron and becomes a DemiGod that
we must stop before its too late.

The Fast crew looks at each and nod.

HOBBS
Lets go fucking kill Donald Trump.