You are on page 1of 3

Andrew Shelley

Julia Remsik

2/19/18

ENG120

Effectiveness of Online Learning

Online courses in college are beneficial to both students and teachers who prefer to

perform tasks at their own pace. Universities have assessed education the same way for Commented [RS1]: Your thesis statement is strong and
gives the paper a good stance from the beginning
centuries, and only in the last twenty years or so has a new medium been introduced that has

allowed for a revolution in education. Online courses are not just a more convenient way for

students to complete their credit hours, they’re for individuals who learn by digesting the

curriculum in a way that works best for them. It is no secret that every student is somewhat

different, and due to that many ‘learning styles’ have been defined to accommodate that. Many Commented [LS2]: add a comma

students may be perfectly fine learning in a traditional environment, while others may struggle

with the consistent class times and the strictly scheduled curriculum. That is why students must

have an online option to better suit their needs. Commented [RR3]: Great Introduction and I liked how
you lead the audience through all the details to introduce
your argument!
If done correctly, online learning can produce results that are on par with traditional Commented [EG4]: I think you are addressing the
situation pretty. I want to hear more about your topic. In
learning. According to studies done, test scores and grades were overall consistent across the your second paragraph you have a lot of citations. I would
like to hear you flesh them out a little. I wanna hear what
you think about these facts and how you will use them. I
different types of learning (Jaggars). These results were backed up further in a study done that would like to hear a little more definition in who your
audience is.
concluded there was no clear difference between online and traditional instruction when
Commented [LS5]: this a really strong introduction. you
comparing test scores at the end (Karr). This is significant because it indicates that students are start your argument really well
able to learn with a different medium, and that validates the online format. Many students have a Commented [KM6]: I'm not too sure what this sentence
means.
hard time maintaining concentration throughout an extended lecture and prefer to divvy up their Commented [RS7]: Overall, I think you could add more
evidence to back up your statement so that your paper
work into several sessions. This was addressed in by Richardson in which she explains that dives deeper into the argument.

students perceived learning was similar between online and traditional learning (2003).

Many critics of online education doubt the student’s accountability when completing and online

course. They do not believe the student can teach themselves anything of consequence and will Commented [RR8]: I loved how you took a viewpoint
from the opposition and answered their concern. This really
strengthen your argument. I would find some evidence
resort to finding answers to questions online. Although this is commonplace in online education,
online to back it up. Great Job!

if a student is required to learn material that is directed for their degree, then they will ensure

they grasp the knowledge to the best of their ability. Commented [KM9]: Hey Andrew,

your introduction does a great job explaining the issue. The


sources you cite could be expanded on, but are used in the
right way. When you talk about student looking up answers
online, you might want to expand on why you think they
won't.
All in all i think you have written a good draft.

Commented [LS10]: the essay argues your point very


nicely, but you might want to expand more on your points
and sources to make your essay longer.
Works Cited

"The Era of Online Learning | Niema Moshiri | TEDxUCSD" Youtube, uploaded by


TEDx Talks, 14 June 2017, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JKgUoY9pTg.
Ebert, Roger. Review of An Inconvenient Truth, directed by Davis Guggenheim.

rogerebert.com, 1 June 2006, www.rogerebert.com/reviews/an-inconvenient-truth-

2006. Accessed 15 June 2016.

Gowdy, John. "Avoiding Self-organized Extinction: Toward a Co-evolutionary

Economics of Sustainability." International Journal of Sustainable Development

and World Ecology, vol. 14, no. 1, 2007, pp. 27-36.

An Inconvenient Truth. Directed by Davis Guggenheim, performances by Al Gore and

Billy West, Paramount, 2006.

You might also like