Professional Documents
Culture Documents
By Steve Scott
How to Approach with NO Fear of Rejection Click Here
Table of Contents
Disclaimer .................................................................. 4
Introduction ................................................................ 5
Obstacle #1- Fear of Approaching ................................. 7
Obstacle #2- Negative Self Talk .................................. 12
Obstacle #3- Hesitation.............................................. 15
Obstacle #4- Too Many Excuses .................................. 17
Obstacle #5- Anger Issues ......................................... 20
Obstacle #6- Believing in Luck Over Success ................ 23
Obstacle #7- Not Knowing How to Start a Conversation…26
Conclusion ................................................................ 35
Disclaimer
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information storage and retrieval system, or transmitted by
email without permission in writing from the publisher.
Introduction
The guys who are the most natural with women have a number of
skills that others don’t possess. They’re confident. They know
how to talk. And they can project a cool, fun attitude.
Over the years, I’ve learned that a lot of the difficulty guys
experience with women comes from the mind. Many have a
mindset which has paralyzes them into inaction whenever they see
an attractive woman.
Overcoming this fear can be really hard for some guys. Often it
takes weeks (even months) of hard work. So I’m not going to lie
and promise a quick solution in this report.
But with that being said, I will reveal how a simple SHIFT in your
mindset can quickly reduce this fear…
Maybe you’re like this? You create a nice, safe fantasy where you
imagine “getting” that hot girl you see across the room. It’s a
comfortable feeling. You don’t have to take a risk. And in this
fantasy you have nothing to lose.
This is the problem with this scenario--- It’s still a fantasy! Sure
it’s fun to imagine being with this attractive girl. But it’s still a
false reality. The challenge comes when you realize you have to
approach this goddess and actually talk to her. You second guess
yourself, wondering things like:
By going over and risking rejection, many feel they could “lose”
what they’ve already “gained.” In other words, it’s more secure to
live in an imaginary world than to have this dream shattered by a
girl who is NOT interested.
A man like this sees an attractive girl and thinks about the
possibilities. Some are positive. Some are negative. The end
result is he’s paralyzed into in-action because he’s too busy
daydreaming.
Sounds easy right? Well it’s one thing to say you don’t care. It’s
another to make this happen. To put this solution into practice, I
recommend doing the following three things:
She’s a person like you and me. I don’t care if she’s the most
beautiful woman in the world she’s still a human being. She’s not
perfect. She’s not your soul mate. And she’s not an angel.
Like men all women have flaws. Stop wasting time thinking
otherwise. Forget the notion that you must *have* this girl.
Here’s a quick fix if you have trouble with this ‘pedestal mindset.’
When you find yourself fantasizing about a particular girl, imagine
her doing something you would find repulsive. Like taking a really
smelly crap. Trust me this image will definitely knock her off your
mental pedestal.
You’re not trying to have sex. You’re not going to get married.
And you don’t really even care if she likes you.
“I am going to talk to this girl and see if I like her. It’s just a
conversation. Nothing more. If I’m interested, I’ll ask for her
number.”
Put this statement into your own words. Memorize it. Then recite
it before you approach any girl.
When you’re about to talk to a girl take note of the words that go
through your head. Are they positive? Or are they negative?
Write down any negative thoughts you have; including the exact
words you’re saying to yourself. Do this exercise a few times to
really root all the different types of self-talk you’re using.
For instance let’s say one of your self-talk statements sounds like
this:
I call this the “perfect line fallacy.” You want her to like you. So
you struggle; trying to think of what to say to start the conversation.
During this time you let minutes (and even hours) to pass BEFORE
you work up the courage to approach this girl.
You know what happens then? She’ll form the opinion that you’re
a low status guy because you’re too scared walk over and talk to
her.
By now you can see why it’s bad to hesitate on approaching a girl.
Not only will you psyche yourself out, you’ll also make her think
you’re an unconfident guy.
The solution may seem over simplified. That’s because the best
solutions are often the easiest ones!
I have no time to start my own business. I’m too fat to join a gym.
She doesn’t seem like the type that would be interested in me.
These are all excuses that guys tell themselves every day.
Instead of dwelling on why you can’t talk to a girl, find a way that
you can.
Do you feel too fat? Too old? Too young? Too boring? Too ugly?
Too poor?
All of these are excuses that guys make. Some can be fixed. Some
can’t
If it’s something like your age; realize it’s time to develop the right
kind of mindset. Some girls are attracted to older guys. And some
are attracted to younger ones. Use your problem solving mind to
create the kind of mindset where you don’t care any “limiting
factor” you possess.
The next time you’re out in social venue like a bar or club; pay
close attention to what guys say among themselves.
You’ll find some will say angry things towards a woman without
even trying to talk to her. They’ll say (or think) stuff about how
she’s probably a bitch, or looks like she has an attitude. [I’m being
polite here…most of what’s actually said is a lot worse.]
I’m not accusing you of having anger. But odds are some guys
reading this report WILL have some hostility towards women. No
matter what, this kind of anger does nothing to help you with
women. The end result of this emotion is you’ll give off a negative
vibe which repulses women.
(Again, I’m not saying you have anger issues. Most of the guys I
meet are perfectly normal. However I think this is an obstacle that
needs to be addressed for the small number of readers who are
dealing with this issue. So if you don’t have any anger, feel free to
skip this and move on to the next session.)
This feeling comes from wanting more success with women, but
not knowing how to do it. A guy like this sees feels insecure every
time he sees an attractive woman. He feels like she’ll reject him if
he approaches her. So in his mind, she’s a bitch because she’ll
*probably* hurt his fragile ego.
It’s up to you to improve your life. I guarantee that with the right
mindset (and hard work), you can have as much success with
women as you want.
Do yourself a favor and start making new friends. Find guys who
have a positive attitude and are good with women. Become friends
with these guys. Find out what works for them. Ask them for
advice. Learn everything you can about giving off that a vibe
that’s naturally attractive to women.
It’s up to you to create the kind of life you want. You’ll find that
being around positive people and developing your social skills is
the secret ingredient to becoming a naturally attractive guy around
women.
Fate will draw her to you. Fate will make her start the
conversation. Fate will let her know that you’re a shy guy so she
has to be the one to set up the date.
Hopefully you can see the danger of relying too much on fate.
When you look to external factors like luck it becomes too easy to
make excuses. Like anytime you *fail* with a woman it’s because
“it wasn’t meant to be.” An attitude like this causes you to have
the mindset that you have no control over your success with
women.
Now this doesn’t mean you should beat yourself after every
*failed* approach. We all get rejected sometimes. It’s the risk you
take when you try to start a conversation with a woman you don’t
know.
All of these are questions you should ask yourself after every
approach. Even the successful ones.
Looking for the lesson on a regular basis will shift your external
mindset into an internal mindset. In other words you’ll stop
making excuses about why you’re not having any *luck* with
women.
Realize that the results you’re getting are due to mistakes you’re
making. Not some insidious outside force that’s controlling your
life.
Create the mindset that you can accomplish whatever you set out to
do in life. Including increasing the success you’ve having with
women.
Should I be direct?
In the section below, I’ll give you three ways you can start a
conversation. All of them are ones I’ve personally use when
approaching women.
I’ll be the first to admit that my approaching skills are less than
stellar. Like a lot of guys, I hate being forced to think of some
The problem is I’ll often see an attractive girl and know the only
way I can meet her is to “sack up” and approach her.
The problem is I’m not really into the long and complicated
conversation starters. Too much to memorize. Instead, I like to
use stuff that’s simple and direct; which immediately get the ball
rolling.
So whenever I spot an
attractive girl, I’ll use my facial
“trick” conversation starter
which works incredibly well.
The truth is, you can “approach” a girl without saying a word!
When a girl looks at you, lock eyes on her and hold it.
Why does this work? Well most people (especially guys) act way
too serious when they’re in a venue like a bar or club. Most are
afraid to be themselves. They’re too busy trying to give off the
‘tough guy’ vibe.
To set yourself apart from these clowns, show that you don’t take
everything too seriously. By showing a woman a playful
expression you demonstrate that you’re a fun guy. Without saying
a word, she’ll know that you’re the type of guy who’ll be
interesting to meet.
I usually like to start with, “Why are you making faces at me?”
This one almost always gets a laugh.
What type of faces should you make? There isn’t a strict formula.
I recommend doing something that’ll get a laugh. For instance,
here are some faces you could make:
If you’re not sure how this works, let me give a quick example that
my buddy Aaron used. Now Aaron isn’t the most attractive guy in
the world, BUT he’s pretty good with women.
Usually, a girl will look away then wait a few seconds before
looking back. When she does, MAKE SURE you don’t turn away!
Instead, try upping the ante by smiling, nodding your head at her,
or using one of the funny expressions I just mentioned!
#4- You’re more interesting than most guys who approach her.
Secondly you need to involve all the people in the group. Not just
the woman you want. Any group you approach should get the
impression that you’re a fun, outgoing guy who isn’t going to be
intrusive.
So using the previous example, you could say something like “Hey
guys. Real quick question… My buddy and I were just having an
argument that I was hoping you could
settle…”
“Hey guys, real quick question… My buddy and I were just having
can argument that I was hoping you could settle…”
So could you settle this argument for me: Do you think he should
continue to cover for himself or should he come clean with his
girlfriend?”
Like I said, this one has been used by a lot of guys. So you’ll
definitely want to create an opener that’s a little bit different.
#3- Go Direct
What do I mean? You approach a woman and tell her that you’re
interested in getting to know her. No pick-up lines. No opinions.
And no gimmicks. You walk up and say that you saw something
interesting about her and you want to know more.
You’ll often get rejected with this one because a woman only has
your appearance and body language to judge you by. So if you’re
not displaying a confident demeanor, then she might not be
interested.
When you go direct all you do is approach the girl, smile, give her
a compliment, and then tell her that you “just had to meet her.”
And this isn’t a lie. If you’re approaching this girl, odds are there
is something about her that does stand out. (Hopefully it’s more
than her looks.)
Intriguing
Interesting
Amusing
Funny
Awesome
Fascinating
With this conversation starter, there’s the belief that your actions
are random. Play your cards right and you’re the confident guy
who she’s been fated to meet.
Conclusion
Well that’s it for this report!
Just remember that it’s a skill like any other. If you challenge
these obstacles and take steps to eliminate them, your success with
women will skyrocket!
To give you an idea of the things you’ll learn here’s brief list of
what’s covered in this system:
λ Advice opener — How to use the confidence of a subject
matter to covertly force a woman to admire you.