Draft 1

“Skill for leadership” and “Applied Sport Science” are both my current
electives that I have chosen to engage in grade 12. To the past, my electives of
grade 11 were “Accounting” and “Marketing” and in grade 10, they were “Introduction
to Business” and “Introduction to Economic”. These electives partly played a role for
the benefits of attending college, helping to have a solid foundation in interpretation
in business field although my faculty has a relation to culinary arts.

With my passion in culinary arts along with chef and restaurant manager as
dream career, I highly have the interest and enthusiasm to study at Paris a
renowned and well-known institution named Le Cordon Bleu(LCB). The Bachelor of
Business in Culinary Arts of LCB will surely offer a great pathway to reach my goal.
According to its compulsory modules, I could apply restaurant management
knowledge and a strong basis2 in cooking to further form up my expected restaurant.
In present day, high-end restaurants besides high quality in ingredients, are
tremendously booming worldwide. Fortunately, suiting to my interest in culinary
world, I could use this opportunity to know my future direction clearier. Additionally, I
have been now engaging several cooking short courses at dissimilar places to attain
basis in cooking skill and begin to practice french language for the comfort and
higher efficiency during the internship.

According to the program’s requirements, the institution expects to students to

have the english proficiency by Academic IELTS score at the minimum of 5.5. The
500 words of resume of motivation and the academic transcripts must be handed.
Currently, I have achieve the overall band of 6 in Academic IELTS but do not yet
have written the resume and academic transcript from MUIDS. In spite of low
academic requirements to engage this Bachelor’s program, it is difficult to graduate
and extremely requires to dedication and passion from learners; however, I am ready
learn and fully engage.

There several achievements have been achieved, provinging to what I have

done in the term of culinary skills. During high school at MUIDS, I have conducted
my own drinking product named Fitchick, serving and being well suitable for students
and staffs who seriously attend weight-training exercise, having goal to earn
effectively muscle growth. My product is the blended chicken with other ingredients
to be drinkable which is having the identical purpose as same as protein powder. I
enabled to sell approximate 15 bottles a day, receiving positively net profit. In
addition, I have obtained 8 culinary certificates from courses that I went for studying.
Therefore, I ought to apply my experience and capability to make my dream come
possibly true after the graduation from LCB.
Improvements:
- I think that some of the electives in the first paragraph isn’t related to your university.
- Good luck!

Draft 2(Final)
“Skill for leadership” and “Applied Sport Science” are both my current
electives that I have chosen to engage in grade 12. To the past, my electives of
grade 11 were “Accounting” and “Marketing” and in grade 10, they were “Introduction
to Business” and “Introduction to Economic”. These electives partly played a role for
the benefits of attending college, helping to have a solid foundation in interpretation
in business field although my faculty has a relation to culinary arts. Nevertheless, I
could apply these knowledge to sustain and attract customers and develop my
restaurant along the trend of society.

With my passion in culinary arts along with chef and restaurant manager as
dream career, I highly have the interest and enthusiasm to study at Paris a
renowned and well-known institution named Le Cordon Bleu(LCB). The Bachelor of
Business in Culinary Arts of LCB will surely offer a great pathway to reach my goal.
According to its compulsory modules, I could apply restaurant management
knowledge and a strong basis2 in cooking to further form up my expected restaurant.
In present day, high-end restaurants besides high quality in ingredients, are
tremendously booming worldwide. Fortunately, suiting to my interest in culinary
world, I could use this opportunity to know my future direction clearier. Additionally, I
have been now engaging several cooking short courses at dissimilar places to attain
basis in cooking skill and begin to practice french language for the comfort and
higher efficiency during the internship.

According to the program’s requirements, the institution expects to students to

have the english proficiency by Academic IELTS score at the minimum of 5.5. The
500 words of resume of motivation and the academic transcripts must be handed.
Currently, I have achieve the overall band of 6 in Academic IELTS but do not yet
have written the resume and academic transcript from MUIDS. In spite of low
academic requirements to engage this Bachelor’s program, it is difficult to graduate
and extremely requires to dedication and passion from learners; however, I am ready
learn and fully engage.

There several achievements have been achieved, provinging to what I have

done in the term of culinary skills. During high school at MUIDS, I have conducted
my own drinking product named Fitchick, serving and being well suitable for students
and staffs who seriously attend weight-training exercise, having goal to earn
effectively muscle growth. My product is the blended chicken with other ingredients
to be drinkable which is having the identical purpose as same as protein powder. I
enabled to sell approximate 15 bottles a day, receiving positively net profit. In
addition, I have obtained 8 culinary certificates from courses that I went for studying.
Therefore, I ought to apply my experience and capability to make my dream come
possibly true after the graduation from LCB.

Process Journal​:

12/10/18
- I had brainstormed what I am supposed to write about my SOP
- Begin writing the SOP

17/10/18
- I completed the first paragraph of the SOP
- I kept reading my first paragraph repeatedly to observe my mistakes.

20/10/18
- I had completed my first draft of my SOP
- One of my friends had left some comments on my draft
27/10/18
- I applied those comments to improve my SOP
- I began modifying my SOP for the better one
- I completed my first paragraph of my second draft

30/10/18
- I resumed my SOP to the second paragraph
- I did the paragraph and had read overall twice to make sure

Reflection:
This statement of purpose(SOP) considered as my first attempt, has taught me the
structure of its. I would apply this understanding of writing structure to further use for
the admission of university. SOP, being one of the factor required from one of
university’s requirements, contains numerous essential information and background;
hence it should be stated into paragraph properly. I have attained some comments
from my friends as improvements.