Professional Documents
Culture Documents
SEPTEMBER ’18
By Ryan Lizza
INSIDE the
Matt
Lauer --NBC
Meltdown
HappY
20th,
By David Usborne
VIAGRA!
THE STRANGE Story
of How a, Um,
Hard Sell Became a PILL
The Suit WORTH BILLIONS
By David Kushner
Will
NEVER
Surrender
Look—YOU
CAN EVEN SWIM
IN ONE!
#SQUADONAMISSION
K J A PA
MUSICIAN & ACTOR
AVA I L A B L E TO P R E - O R D E R AT F O S S I L .C O M
Smartwatches powered with Wear OS by Google are compatible with iPhone® and Android™ phones. Wear OS by Google and other related marks are trademarks of Google LLC.
Touchscreen smartwatches powered with Wear OS by Google require a phone running Android OS 4.4+ (excluding Go edition) or iOS 9.3+. Supported features may vary between platforms.
T R AC K YO U R H E A RT R AT E
TA K E I T SW I M M I N G
SWAP YOUR DIALS
PROMOTION
BY INVITATION ONLY
THE TRIFECTA GALA
The Trifecta – the annual Derby Eve celebration took
place at the new Omni Hotel Louisville. The black tie
event was hosted by Arsenio Hall and featured an iconic
performance by Stevie Wonder. Esquire was a proud
partner of the event, alongside Coca-Cola, Porsche,
and Beam Suntory brands.
Clockwise from top left: Star Jones, Oficial Derby Trophy,
Eden Bridgeman; Trifecta Ambiance; Trifecta Guests;
Anthony Anderson; Arsenio Hall; Trifecta Guests
MAKE AN
ENTRANCE
EVEN WHEN
LEAVING.
MORALCODE.COM
AVA I L A B L E AT N O R D S T R O M . C O M
Where ready-to-wear meets custom clothing for a brand new take on men’s wardrobing.
Talk to our personal stylists online, or meet with them at one of six well-appointed locations.
TRUNKCLUB.COM
57 The Code
The sweater that punches up any outit; rock-
able jewelry; a face mask that’ll have you
looking better; how Ansel Elgort got his style.
Full Disclosure
78 By Ryan Lizza
With the GOP acting like a personality
cult, is there anything President Trump could
do to lose party support?
Unconventional Wisdom
81 By Dwight Garner
Ten artists, writers, and other creative inspira-
tions you might not know . . . but need to.
84 Cherry
By Nico Walker
An exclusive book excerpt inspired by the au-
thor’s de-evolution from student and soldier to
heroin addict and bank robber.
A B R I E F M O N T H LY E X PA N S I O N O N
A TO P I C E X P LO R E D I N T H E I S S U E
The neutrality of this information is disputed. And rightfully so. By Drew Dernavich
CONTENTS F E AT U R E S
may consider Naugahyde, which is the University of Phoenix The TOM WOLFE,
ESQUIRE, and
of clothing materials. ToM Varoom! Varoom!
the B I R T H
ToM
Y
HaRDY
OF AN AMERICAN
Original D
By Eric Sullivan
H aR
INSIDE the
Matt
Lauer--NBC
Meltdown
HappY
20th,
By David Usborne
VIAGRA!
THE STRANGE Story
of How a, Um,
Hard Sell Became a PILL
The Suit WORTH BILLIONS The May
hem an
Will
By David Kushner
dM Y
ST E RY L
NEVER BE
Surrender od RE
Look—YOU ywo
CAN EVEN SWIM Holl
IN ONE! uine lli va n
Gen
ic Su
By Er
of a
30 Se pt e m b e r 2 018 _ E sq u ire
this Way In
MAVERICKS OF STYLE
JOHN MULANEY
H A S T H E S H A R P E ST
W I T I N C O M E DY
PaGE 93
JAY F I E L D E N JAC K E S S I G
Editor in Chief Senior Vice-President, Publishing Director
& Chief Revenue Officer
MICHAEL HAINEY Executive Director of Editorial
HELENE F. RUBINSTEIN Editorial Director CAMERON CONNORS Executive Director, Head of Brand
NICK SULLIVAN Fashion Director Strategy and Marketing
EMILY POENISCH Entertainment Features Director LAUREN JOHNSON Integrated Advertising Director
MATTHEW MARDEN Style Director SAMANTHA IRWIN General Manager, Hearst Men’s Group
BRUCE HANDY Features Director CHRIS PEEL Executive Director, Men’s and
JOHN KENNEY Managing Editor Enthusiast Group, Hearst Magazines
KEVIN SINTUMUANG Culture and Lifestyle Director Digital Media
RYAN LIZZA Chief Political Correspondent CARYN KESLER Executive Director of Luxury Goods
BOB MANKOFF Cartoon and Humor Editor JOHN WATTIKER Executive Director of Fashion & Retail
MAXIMILLIAN POTTER Editor at Large DOUG ZIMMERMAN Senior Grooming Director
JEFF GORDINIER Food and Drinks Editor MARISA STUTZ Group Advertising Director,
ASH CARTER, ERIC SULLIVAN Senior Editors Hearst Autos
JON ROTH Style Editor JUSTIN HARRIS Midwest Director
AMY GRACE LOYD Literary Editor SANDY ADAMSKI Executive Director
ADRIENNE WESTENFELD Assistant Editor BRIAN KANTOR Integrated Account Director,
BRADY LANGMANN Editorial Assistant New England and Canada
ART JOE PENNACCHIO Eastern Automotive Sales Director,
RAUL AGUILA Design Director Hearst Autos
C. J. ROBINSON Design Assistant SARA SCHIANO Integrated Account Director
REBECCA IOVAN Digital Imaging Specialist ANNE RETHMEYER Integrated Sales Director, West Coast,
PHOTOGRAPHY Hearst Autos
ALIX CAMPBELL Chief Photography Director, Hearst Magazines GIL TIAMSIC Integrated Account Director
JUSTIN O’NEILL Photo Director JOHN V. CIPOLLA Integrated Account Manager, Southeast
LARISA KLINE Associate Photo Editor NINA FROST Digital Sales Director, Hearst Autos
FA S H I O N LISA LACASSE Digital Sales Director, Hearst Autos
TED STAFFORD Market Director PA C I F I C N O R T H W E S T : ANDREA WIENER,
MICHAEL STEFANOV Market Editor Athena Media Partners, 415-828-0908
ALFONSO FERNÁNDEZ NAVAS Fashion Assistant TEXAS, ARKANSAS, AND NEW MEXICO: DAWN BAR,
COPY Wisdom Media, 214-526-3800
ALISA COHEN BARNEY Senior Copy Editor I TA LY : ALESSANDRO CARACCIOLO, (011) 39-02-6619-3142
CONNOR SEARS, DAVID FAIRHURST Assistant Copy Editors MARY JANE BOSCIA, Business and Events Coordinator
RESEARCH
SAVANNAH BIGELOW, SHELBY IANNIELLO, CAITLIN MORTON,
ROBERT SCHEFFLER Research Editor KAYLA SAVAGE, TONI STARRS, YVONNE VILLAREAL, Integration Associates
KEVIN MCDONNELL Senior Associate Research Editor MARKETING SOLUTIONS
NICK PACHELLI Assistant Research Editor JASON GRAHAM Executive Director, Integrated Marketing
W R I T E R S AT L A R G E JANA NESBITT GALE Executive Creative Director,
ALEX FRENCH, STEPHEN RODRICK Group Marketing
CONTRIBUTING EDITORS WILLIAM UPTON Director, Integrated Marketing
ALEX BELTH, LEA CARPENTER, LUKE DITTRICH, CAL FUSSMAN, DWIGHT GARNER, ADAM GRANT, YASIR SALEM Director, Group Marketing
A. J. JACOBS, DANIEL MENAKER, BENJAMIN PERCY, CHARLES P. PIERCE, BEN RATLIFF, MIKE SAGER, KAREN MENDOLIA Special Projects Director, Group Marketing
DAVID HIRSHEY AND MICHAEL SOLOMON (Dubious Achievements Desk) MICHAEL B. SARPY Art Director, Group Marketing
D I G I TA L AMANDA KAYE Senior Manager, Integrated Marketing
MICHAEL SEBASTIAN Site Director • BEN BOSKOVICH Managing Editor A’NGELIQUE TYREE Senior Manager, Digital Marketing
JONATHAN EVANS Senior Style Editor • NATE ERICKSON Senior Lifestyle Editor • TYLER COATES Senior Culture Editor AMANDA BESSIM Integrated Marketing Coordinator/
MATT MILLER Associate Culture Editor • JACK HOLMES Associate News and Politics Editor • CHRISTINE FLAMMIA Executive Assistant
Associate Style Editor • SARAH RENSE Associate Lifestyle Editor • ELENA HILTON Assistant Editor, Social PETER DAVIS Research Manager
Media • KEVIN PERALTA Designer • KELLY SHERIN Photo Editor • ANDREW COHEN Legal Correspondent WILLIAM CARTER Executive Director, Consumer Marketing
JUSTIN KIRKLAND Staff Writer • DOM NERO Video Editor • MIKE KIM, CHOZ BELEN Designers A D M I N I S T R AT I O N A N D P R O D U C T I O N
GABRIELLE BRUNEY Weekend Editor • DAVE HOLMES Editor at Large • CHARLES P. PIERCE, LUKE O’NEIL Writers at Large TERRY GIELLA Advertising Services Manager
HEARST PHOTOGRAPHY GROUP ANDREW M. JOYCE Operations Account Manager
DARRICK HARRIS, JAMES MORRIS Directors • CARY GEORGES, FIONA LENNON Deputy Directors DIRECT RESPONSE ADVERTISING
LAUREN HECHEL Senior Editor • LAUREN BROWN Editor • SARAH ECKINGER, CORI JAYNE HOWARTH, CHRISTINE HALL Director
IGNACIO MURILLO Associate Editors • AMY COOPER Assistant MARIE NAKOS Account Manager
P U B L I S H E D B Y H E A R S T C O M M U N I C AT I O N S , I N C .
E S Q U I R E I N T E R N AT I O N A L E D I T I O N S
STEVEN R. SWARTZ President & Chief Executive Officer
Bulgaria, China, Colombia, Czech Republic, Greece, Hong Kong, Indonesia,
WILLIAM R. HEARST III Chairman
Kazakhstan, Korea, Latin America, Malaysia, Middle East, Netherlands,
FRANK A. BENNACK, JR. Executive Vice Chairman
Philippines, Poland, Romania, Russia, Serbia, Singapore, Spain, Taiwan,
CATHERINE A. BOSTRON Secretary
Thailand, Turkey, United Kingdom, Vietnam
CARLTON CHARLES Treasurer
KIM ST. CLAIR BODDEN SVP/International Editorial Director HEARST MAGAZINES DIVISION
DAVID CAREY President
MICHAEL CLINTON President, Marketing & Publishing
Director
TROY YOUNG President, Digital Media
JOANNA COLES Chief Content Officer
DEBI CHIRICHELLA Senior Vice President,
Chief Financial Officer
GILBERT C. MAURER, Publishing Consultants
MARK F. MILLER
BE ST.
CAREER .
EVER . Matt Groening will forever be known as the guy
behind The Simpsons, now the longest-running
he creator of THE SIMPSONS prime-time scripted series in television history. Hey, a
and FUTURAMA extends guy could do worse. But the 64-year-old former cartoon-
ist has never been one to rest on his Emmys: Groening
his cartoon multiverse into the remains intimately involved with every episode of his
realm of hard-drinking best-known show (639 at this writing) and has spent
the past several years developing a new animated se-
princesses and neurotic elves ries called Disenchantment (debuting this month on
By Dan Hyman Netlix), set in the mythical kingdom of Dreamland.
Amid a typically busy day shuttling between the
L.A. studios where his shows are made, Groening spoke
with Esquire about the origins of Disenchantment, his
love of Bollywood, and the secret to The Simpsons’
Montgomery Burns–like longevity. c ont i nu e d ▶
c on ti nu ed ▶ Dan Hyman: What inspires someone with the culture has become
three decades of success to say, “I’m going to start from crasser but also more po-
He’s Matt
square one”? litically correct. Are the
Groening.
Matt Groening: I just love creating new worlds. I’ve been shifting boundaries of
Who the Hell
fascinated since I was a kid by fantasy maps and old Dell humor in 2018 something
Are You?
crime paperbacks that had maps on the back covers. you considered?
There was a very spooky poster from 1930 that hung in MG: You never know. You Hometown:
the den of my parents’ house called “The Land of Make work for a couple years on Portland, Oregon
Believe,” by an artist named Jaro Hess. It scared the something and you don’t Early work:
hell out of me, but I loved it. I actually tracked it down know what it’s going to be The alternative comic strip
and hung it in my kitchen to scare my children. But it’s or how it’s going to be per- Life in Hell, which
always been an inspiration to me. I mean, The Simpsons ceived. That’s the hardest ran from 1980 to 2012
is its own parallel universe, and certainly Futurama is thing about animation, Inspirations:
the same thing. And now Disenchantment is a third one. by the way: getting the Charles Schulz, Walt Disney
DH: How long did it take for this particular universe to tone right. Especially in a
Emmys:
take shape in your head? Eskpertise world that is completely
36 nominations, 11 wins
MG: I started a notebook full of ideas for the show in made-up. The challenge
2012...or maybe a little earlier. Every time I thought of becomes whether you Side hustle:
a diferent kind of fantasy trope, I’d write it down and can get people to climb Played cowbell for
see if there was a way of sticking it in the show. I have lists on board and make them the Rock Bottom
of every kind of small mythical forest creature: gnomes, forget for a moment or Remainders (bandmates
included Stephen
fairies, imps, goblins, gremlins, trolls, plus a bunch that two that they’re watching
King and Amy Tan)
I can’t remember right now. It’s all there in the note- a cartoon and get caught
book. But it’s hard. If you want to tell jokes about elves up in the feelings. World events predicted by
and dragons and so on and so forth, pretty soon you re- Paradoxically, as I get The Simpsons:
alize, Oh, every single dragon joke has already been made. older, I am less interested Donald Trump’s presidency,
DH: But you always intended to create another ani- in fantasy and more inter- self-driving
trucks, Disney’s pending
mated series? ested in reality. And by re-
First rule of fashion: acquisition of Fox
MG: Oh, yeah. I think about ideas for diferent TV shows ality, I mean real emotions.
If you want it,
all the time. What holds me back is knowing how hard it The trappings of the show
you can’t afford it.
is to actually pull them of, and whether I really want to I’m amused by, but what really gets me going is the stuf
commit myself to something that keeps on going. You with heart.
know, my comic strip Life in Hell lasted 33 years. The DH: Obviously being on a platform like Netflix, as
Simpsons is 29 years and running. Futurama didn’t last opposed to network TV, gives you more freedom.
as long. [It ran for seven nonconsecutive seasons.] So I MG: I still think about boundaries, because there are
have to really want to do it for me to plow forward. some. Actually, one of the nice things about conventional
DH: I hear you drew inspiration from some rather television is that the boundaries are clear on what you
obscure sources for Disenchantment. can show and what you can say. With Netlix, they’re
MG: I don’t think they’re obscure, but other people very encouraging for us to do whatever we want to do.
could consider them obscure. So in a given show there Still, we found early on that there’s a certain kind of dirty
might be homages to Buster Keaton and to an Indian joke that within this show just didn’t feel right. But who’s
ilmmaker named S.S. Rajamouli, who has made some to know what people will be bothered by?
of my favorite ilms of the last decade. I particularly rec- DH: As of this past April, The Simpsons became the
ommend a movie called Magadheera. I’m getting very longest-running prime-time scripted show in television
obscure now. But this stuf just makes me so happy. HERE BE LULZ history. How much longer do you see it going?
DH: When it irst aired, The Simpsons was viewed as Disenchantment’s Bean, MG: The work itself is very real. There’s very little strut-
wildly subversive and even controversial. Since then, Luci, and Elfo. ting around the studio saying, “Look how long we’ve
been on the air!” It’s mostly just doing the job, and it’s
really fun. And if I could point out something about
The Simpsons that the general fans might not know: It
has turned into a forum for diferent kinds of animated
humor. There’s not a single kind of joke. We do jokes
that are about animation, we do parodies, we do topi-
cal humor, we do family-sitcom jokes, we do all kinds of
diferent approaches to humor. And as a result, it’s not
the same as what it used to be. But to me, it’s also not
repetitious, because we’re always exploring new things.
illustration: Ben Schwartz
40 Se pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _ E sq u ire
PROMOTION
BY INVITATION ONLY
ESQUIRE & PATRÓN TEQUILA TOAST THE
BEST BARS IN AMERICA 2018
Esquire Food & Drinks Editor Jef Gordinier and Culture & Lifestyle
Director Kevin Sintumuang co-hosted an exclusive event celebrating our
ever-growing list of the best bars in America.
The event was held at George Washington Bar in New York City, one of the
2018 honorees, and guests enjoyed custom Patrón cocktails made special
for the evening by head bartender Ben Rojo.
the Big Bite
SPORTS
WHO WILL HEADLINE THE We can write 5 Times Jerry Jones makes an empty threat
to sue the NFL
off “This Is America”
playing anywhere near 16 NFL owners who are named as defendants in
an NFL stadium. cheerleaders’ harassment suits
Parlay Taylor Swift
with an Ed 10 Heckling children Cam Newton attempts to fist-fight
Sheeran cameo.
.5 Games won by the Cleveland Browns
There’s nothing quite like Roger Goodell institutes a Fortnite ban in NFL
locker rooms.
quarterback privilege.
Big Ben got a mulligan
Ndamukong Suh is the first player suspended under
for his sexual-assault the new helmet-targeting rule.
allegations—our money’s
on that not lasting long. Rob Gronkowski executes another late MMA-style
cheap shot yet remains a fan favorite.
Now that he can gamble, your suburban-dad-
We wouldn’t be turned-wannabe-Soprano buddy suddenly starts
Ben Jameis Ezekiel Richie dropping the word vig into casual conversation.
Roethlisberger Winston Elliott Incognito surprised if the NFL
6–1 9–1 15–1 20–1 continued to follow the As the MAGA faithful shame kneeling players and
way of the presidency. the #ImWithHers shame the NFL for shaming
WHICH TEAM’S FANS WILL HAVE If anything seems kneeling players, party lines temporarily cease to
THE MOST ARRESTS AT A SINGLE inconceivable to you— exist as both sides call for an NFL boycott.
bet that it’ll happen.
A playoff game is decided by a
poorly worded catch rule. But hey,
that’s football!
Philly built a drinking mall
smack in the middle of The upcoming Child’s Play reboot casts Jon Gruden
its three major sports as Chucky’s humanoid father.
Philadelphia Buffalo Cincinnati Seattle stadiums. Don’t count out
Eagles Bills Bengals Seahawks an Eagles fan who’s ten The NFL catches a referee point-shaving, the gam-
3–1 10–1 18–1 40–1 Yuenglings deep. bling ban is reinstated, and none of this matters.
LAFFS
HACK MY LIFE
How to pick the perfect golf umbrella for the city By Joe Keohane
FOOD
WOKE E ATS
In SAN FRANCISCO, a new kind
of restaurant business is
injecting CULTURAL DIVERSITY
into the land of tech luxocrats
By Jef Gordinier
How much do I love jerk chicken? True story: A
few months ago, while my wife was in the hospi-
tal enduring hours of labor as she prepared to give
birth to our twin boys, my mind kept taking a U-turn
back to the little Jamaican restaurant that I had spied
around the corner. As we waited and listened to our
hospital playlist, I became hungrier and hungrier day-
dreaming about the lavors of Jamaica. Finally, Lauren
uttered the magic words—“go for it”—and I dashed
over to Caribbean Thyme for a platter of jerk chicken
with plantains and rice and an extra spoonful of oxtail
gravy. After all, there were babies on the way.
I mention this story because I had the same reac-
tion earlier this year when I was in San Francisco. I
heard that there was a new restaurant, Kaya, special-
izing in the food and drink of Jamaica. I was psyched.
I was also surprised, because Kaya turned out to have
a pretty tony address. Launched by chef Nigel Jones, it
opened at 1420 Market Street, across the street from
the corporate headquarters of both Uber and Twitter.
Now, there’s no reason organic jerk chicken and
oxtail stew shouldn’t be available within walk-
ing distance of Bay Area technology titans. (If the
A few months back, Patterson knew he had to close their clout and cash not to WANT ICE
one of his restaurants, Alta, at 1420 Market Street, expand their own empires, per
but he still had a lease. “Instead of giving up the lease, se, but to give young voices a CREAM WITH
he approached me and said, ‘Hey, I love your food,’ ” platform of their own? THOSE FRIES?
Jones remembers. “ ‘Why don’t we think about a col- For decades, of course,
laboration?’ Daniel is the establishment, so to speak, young cooks have endured
but he has reached out to say, ‘How can I open the merciless hours by the stove
door for other people?’ ” Patterson has since gone on while their star-chef employ-
to do the same thing for two other businesses: Dyafa, ers have tiptoed off to tape
a Middle Eastern restaurant in Oakland whose chef is Second rule of fashion: TV shows. W hat Patter-
Reem Assil; and Besharam, inside a San Francisco art If you can’t son is doing is different; it’s It’s not often that a bar snack
space called the Minnesota Street Project, where chef afford it, fake it. more akin to Brian Eno twid- delivers shock and nostalgia
at the same time, but the
Heena Patel serves Indian fare. dling knobs behind the scenes
pièce de résistance at Ludlow
Is it foolishly idealistic to imagine that a few to help guide Talking Heads Liquors in Chicago does just
modest restaurants could make an impact on the to greatness. Jones, Assil, that. Courtesy of chef Nick
cultural vibrancy of a major metropolis? Maybe not. and Patel have creative con- Jirasek (who operates under
“My hope is that if it’s successful, other people will trol over the cooking, decor, the moniker Old Habits), it’s
say, ‘Oh, this is a good business model,’ ” Patterson and music at Kaya, Dyafa, and a frosty scoop of vanilla
told me. “If a lot of people did this, it would change Besharam, but they can count ice cream accompanied by a
our country. I think it’s important not to underes- on someone like Aaron Paul, heap of hot french fries and
timate the efect that one person in one place can the beverage guru at Patter- a generous pour of gravy that
son’s Alta Group, for insights tastes like your grandma’s
pot roast. Sweet, salty, meaty,
on wine, beer, and cocktails.
and weird. Let’s make that
It remains to be seen whether a double. —J. G.
these modest woke restaurants
will make a dent in thwarting
San Francisco’s mutation into a generic play-
ground for venture-capital luxocrats, but hey,
it’s worth a try.
“We’ve been able to create one of those melting-pot
spaces in Oakland,” Jones says. “You see everybody—
illustration: Ben Schwartz
montblanc.com/1858
the Big Bite
CARS
market force. Swiss fashion house Bally sells a $1,500 from nappa leather if I could aford them.
tracksuit. The $750 Balenciaga sock sneaker is among
the most coveted shoes in high fashion. And now, for
$200,000, you can own an SUV from the maker of HOW ELSE CAN $200K MOVE YOU?
some of earth’s most face-melting cars: Lamborghini.
The fast-and-fancy crossover isn’t new. With the
now-16-year-old Cayenne, Porsche proved that a
sports-car maker could build an SUV and not ding
the brand’s heritage. Still, a Lamborghini SUV? 2 Alfa Romeo
Even if you’re clueless about cars, you know that’s
an oxymoron. 16 Trek Madone 9.9s
($12,000 each): The finest
But oh, what’s that in the rearview? It’s your skepti-
tour ($157,300): Travel to goes 0 to 60 in 3.6 carbon superbike money
cism being left behind thanks to 650 hp and 627 ft-lb nine destinations over seconds but for less than can buy. You still have to
of torque. After I took a few laps in the V-8-powered 23 days on a private jet. half the price. pedal, though.
54 Se pt e m b e r 2 018 _ E sq u ire
Hillshire farm® turkey
is slow roasted for hours.
And devoured in seconds.
At Hillshire Farm , right after we carve our deliciously seasoned turkey, we double seal
®
every slice for freshness. Which leads to the best Turkey, Arugula & Tomato sandwich
you’ve ever tasted. Visit HillshireFarm.com for more sandwich inspiration.
the Code Because Style Is Always Personal
BRIGHTLY
KNIT
Whether you’re in a
style groove or a rut, a
FAIR ISLE SWEATER
can add NEW LIFE
to your LOOK
Those who know
me will tell you:
I am not a man who
breaks his stride when
it comes to style. Is
that boring? Maybe. I
prefer to see it as con-
sistent. Steady on. Pull
open my closet and
you’ll find a landscape
of deep browns, calm-
ing greens, charcoal
WEAR IT OUT
A FAIR ISLE KNIT
SPEAKS FOR
ITSELF, BUT IT ALSO
PLAYS WELL
WITH OTHERS. TRY
IT UNDER A
CORDUROY SUIT OR
WITH A BLAZER
AND JEANS FOR SOME
EXTRA POLISH. ORIGIN STORY
FAIR GAME
58 Se pt e m b e r 2 01 8 _E sq u ire
the Code: Hardware
Rare is the man who launched his signature Instead, it’s got a rugged,
STONES?
A lot of guys believe any- posed of richly textured ing tips, Varvatos says to
thing beyond a wedding stones like jasper, tur- take a cue from his run-
ring belongs only on rock quoise, and lapis and pre- ways: “Our philosophy in
stars. Fitting, then, that cious metals like bronze, clothes has always been
You may not be KEITH RICHARDS, but you John Varvatos, designer silver, and gold, the col- lightly layered. I feel the
can still channel his style to music’s A-list, has just lection is far from lashy. same way about jewelry.
Go slow and ind a few
things you really love.”
With more than one hun-
dred pieces to choose
from, that shouldn’t take
too long. —J. R.
IT’S A STEEL
The world’s oldest SWISS watchmaker
regularly turns out tickers IN THE SIX FIGURES.
Now it’s made one for the rest of us.
LIKE A BOSS
A TECHNICAL fabric is the SHARPEST
way to show YOU MEAN BUSINESS
THE LOOKBOOK
LEGENDS OF THE FALL
• • • Bonobos has made its
name selling stylish, affordable
clothes that actually fit. This
fall, it drives home the “style”
part of that equation, producing
brilliant graphic knits, richly tex-
tured outerwear, and, of course,
perfectly cut trousers. The ele-
vated aesthetic is no accident.
Design head Dwight Fenton
has deployed brighter colors and
richer materials to “diversify
what is typically a more subdued
season.” We say the bolder,
the better. —Michael Stefanov
KIT INCLUDES:
WIDE STAINLESS
STEEL BLADES • Outliner t-wide stainless
steel blade for extreme
precision & sharpness
• Wide stainless steel blade
for cutting performance
• In-liner blade for lining
and designing
EASILY • Nose hair trimmer and shaver
INTERCHANGEABLE
ATTACHMENTS • Five comb attachments for various
cutting lengths (2, 4, 6, 12, 16m)
• Power rechargeable base &
charger comb, cleaning brush
& blade oil
• Storage / charging base
GROOMING ESSENTIALS
THE FIVE PIECE PROFESSIONAL CLIPPER
One-size-its-all isn’t our typical mantra, but here’s an exception—this ive piece trimmer
set. You need power, precision, control and versatility—this premium trimmer has them
all. Instantly interchange any of the ive grooming blades to tackle the tightest curves and
toughest crevices for that well-groomed look.
U LTA . C O M / B R A N D / E S Q U I R E - G R O O M I N G
the Code
The contrast
between denim
and wool makes
tailoring feel
casual.
If you’re not
built like
a stick insect,
pleats are your
friend.
The secret
to looking
(and feeling)
comfortable in
a suit? A soft
structure.
THE SHOE
THAT Fine
ALWAYS
textures keep
formal clothes
from seeming
boring.
FITS
If there’s a wrong way to wear The flipped
jacket collar
a Wallabee, we haven’t found it yet is a study in
sprezzatura.
There aren’t many whatever the reason, houses like Saint Laurent
shoes that work these moccasin-chukka and Tod’s making subtle
as well on an Oxford crossbreeds have quietly tweaks to a classic. An accent
professor as they do on earned their place as the Whether it’s imitation or color adds
the Wu-Tang Clan, but most versatile kicks homage, you can’t have personality.
Wallabees do just that. around. Clarks has been too much of a good thing.
Chalk it up to the suede turning out the originals —Adrienne Westenfeld
upper, the crepe sole, since 1967, but this sea- Shoes ($695) by Tod’s; jeans
the rugged stitching, or son the fashion crowd ($250) by A.P.C.; socks ($165)
the distinctive shape— got in on the game, with by the Elder Statesman.
BR V2-94 RACING BIRD · Bell & Ross Inc. +1.888.307.7887 · e-boutique: www.bellross.com
STACYADAMS.COM
VERSACE ALEXANDER McQUEEN
BELT IT OUT
• • • By nature I’m more of a backpack guy, but when I saw the new
Burberry belt bag for the first time in London, I did a double take.
The size is perfect, and the contrasting belt is really snazzy (though
you can get it in black too, if you prefer). Best of all, the leather
Bigger, bolder, brasher—THE
SUIT TO BUY this fall takes a HARD LINE
—Matthew Marden
The chalk stripe has casual). For a few dark the texture beneath
always appealed decades it was adopted the jacket with a thick
to larger-than-life by Wall Street fat knit in a bold, earthy
types. Wider than a cats, but this fall the tone. Play with pattern
pinstripe and woven in stripe is returning to by adding a funky
rich lannel, the pattern form: Designers from argyle sweater, or pile
was a favorite with Hugo Boss to Versace on the outerwear for a
JFK, Salvador Dalí, and are knocking the dust more layered approach.
Winston Churchill (who off the pattern and A suit this bold will
would wear a chalk- reminding us that it support any styling
stripe jumpsuit while was always meant to be trick you can throw at
inspecting the troops, a statement. it—just bring enough
thereby inventing the So go ahead and get attitude to carry it off.
concept of business loud with it. Turn up —A . W.
S eptember 2018_Esquire 69
the Code: Grooming
Verso Intense
Facial Mask
Feeling worse for wear?
This quenching sheet
mask is packed with
dermatologist favorites like
retinol and ceramides to
help reduce wrinkles.
$75; bloomingdales.com
Tom Ford
Intensive Purifying
Mud Mask
The mood ring of mud
masks, this thick,
clay-based formula turns
light gray as it extracts
oil, dirt, and toxins straight
from your pores.
$60; tomford.com
D O YO U B E L I E V E I N TA K I N G
C A R E O F YO U R S E L F ?
WE DON’T ENDORSE ALL OF PATRICK
BATEMAN’S PROCLIVITIES, BUT
THE MAN WAS AHEAD OF HIS TIME WHEN
IT CAME TO SKIN CARE.
Grown Alchemist
Hydra- Repair
Cream-Masque
This mask/moisturizer
hybrid (use a nickel-
sized amount daily, or
slather it on once
a week) is rich in oil-
balancing botanicals
and hydrating
hyaluronic acid.
$69; davidpirrotta.com
ph otog raph s :
*Cigar & Spirits Magazine
February 2018 Issue
D I S C OV E R M O R E AT N O L E T S G I N .C O M
the Code: How to Wear It
’SUP, LAYER?
GO AHEAD, work in some WARMER clothes.
Just don’t do it ALL AT ONCE.
• • • No one loves fall more
than I do, especially from a
style perspective. The end
of summer means a welcome
return to sweaters, thick
wools, and flannels. (It also
means I no longer have
to look at gobs of sweaty
flesh every time I go outside.
That’s another story.)
But here’s the thing about
fall style—you can’t rush the
season. You know these guys,
the season-rushers: They’re
the nerds who did what Mommy
told them and wore their
heavy fall clothes on the first
day of school, even though the
temperature still hovered in
Shoulder Season the 80s. These guys are
Paul Weller knew better than to run for a grown-up now and still making
parka at the first sign of a chill. the same mistakes. The trees
don’t drop their leaves all in
one day. So why do so many
AMI Officine men pull on topcoats the min-
Alexandre Générale ute the temperature dips be-
Mattiussi low 50? If it hit 50 in March,
you’d change into shorts and a
T-shirt. What gives?
September and October
should be a slow build, a
chance to incrementally layer
up. In these early days of cooler
weather, think about the pieces
you can add and subtract.
. . . and wrong During those chilly mornings,
The right . . . way throw a vest over your sport
to layer.
coat. When it warms up in
the afternoon, lose the coat and
keep the vest. That way, you’ll
look cool—not sweaty. —M.H.
THE ARSENAL
• • • You don’t need a
ton of new clothes to
ease into the season.
It’s about making
better use of the
stuff you’ve already
got. Here, three
cool-weather essen- The ideal core warmer—wear it over a When it’s as wet as it is cold, make a Try subbing in an unlined tweed blazer for a
tials and how to blazer or under, or use it to top off your breathable, water-resistant windbreaker light coat. You’ll look a lot sharper and stay
make the most of them. favorite sweater. Vest ($795) by Herno. your top layer. Jacket ($148) by Nautica. just as warm. Jacket ($358) by Brooks Brothers.
72 Se pt e m b e r 2 018 _E sq u ire
Sleep In The Clouds
tomorrowsleep.com
?iOekhCWĄh[iiA[[f_d]Oek
<hecOekh8[ăIb[[f5
Does it keep you cool when you’re hot? Cozy when you’re not?
:e[i_jh[āedZjeoekhXeZom[_]^j"b_ø_d]oek_d`kăj^[h_]^jfbWY[i5
:_iYel[hj^[d[mJecehhem>oXh_ZCWĄh[ii"j^[h[ikbje\'&&o[Whie\
h[i[WhY^WdZcWdk\WĂkh_d][nf[hj_i[Xoj^[mehbZÉib[WZ_d]
ib[[f[nf[hjiWjI[hjWI_ccedi8[ZZ_d]$
'(+eù!(<H;;7_hoF_bbemi
Use Code: I>KJ;O;(
tomorrowsleep.com
365
:WoJh_Wb
LWb_ZedfkhY^Wi[imehj^+&&ehceh[Wjjecehhemib[[f$Yecj^hek]^&/%(/%(&'.$9WddejX[YecX_d[Zm_j^Wdoej^[heù[hi$I[[m[Xi_j[\ehZ[jW_bi$
7M^eb[O[WhjeIWo?Bel[Oek
=[Ą_d]W]h[Wjd_]^jÉiib[[fi^ekbZX[[Wio"
j^WjÉim^om[eù[h\h[[(#)ZWo^ec[Z[b_l[ho
WdZW),+d_]^jh_ia#\h[[jh_Wb$
?\oekZedÉjWXiebkj[bobel[oekhd[mJecehhemcWĄh[ii"
ekh:h[WcJ[Wcm_bbf_Ya_jkf\eh\h[[$
'(+eù!(<H;;7_hoF_bbemi
Use Code: I>KJ;O;(
tomorrowsleep.com
LWb_ZedfkhY^Wi[imehj^+&&ehceh[Wjjecehhemib[[f$Yecj^hek]^&/%(/%(&'.$9WddejX[YecX_d[Zm_j^Wdoej^[heù[hi$I[[m[Xi_j[\ehZ[jW_bi$JI(&&')#&*#')/-//#,
P RO M OT I O N
S T Y L E AGEN DA
PREMIUM MEN’S SHOES AND ACCESSORIES
Moral Code is based on the premise that good quality and high
style shouldn’t be exclusive. We are able to offer shoes that
are hand-crafted from luxurious materials for half the price
of similarly made footwear.
Use promo code ESQUIRE for 20% off your f irst purchase at
www.moralcode.com
Vanishing POINT
With the GOP acting like a PERSONALITY CULT, is there any RED LINE President Trump
could cross—DNA evidence? war with Germany?—that would cost him party support? “Doubtful,” say
a dozen top REPUBLICANS stuck hard behind the MAGA eight ball. By Ryan Lizza
80 Se pt e m b e r 2 01 8 _E sq u ire
ESQ Unconventional Wisdom
IQ
Subjects for F U R T H E R I N Q U I RY
TEN AR TI ST S , WRITERS , and other CRE ATIVE
INSPIR ATIONS you might not know . . . but need to By Dwight Garner
A. J. LIEBLING A L L I S O N J A N A E H A M I LT O N S A L LY T I M M S
here’s no way to make your poetry—the book to buy is Poems: 1959– lege in New York, / Eating buttered toast in
life longer, H. L. Mencken re- 2009—is to take a pagan holiday. His bed with cunty ingers on a Sunday morn-
S eptember 2018_Esquire 81
in blood rather than ink. Come for the net-
tling put-downs (“your back is my favorite
part of you, / the part furthest away from
your mouth”), stay for her supple and inter-
rogating mind. Her name rhymes with click,
not cluck. Up at the top of the mountain of
American verse, those are her footprints.
WWOZ: New Orleans is more pricklingly
alive than other American cities for many
reasons, including this one: It has an insis-
tent, often elegiac soundtrack, supplied by
the nonproit radio station WWOZ. When
you’re in New Orleans, WWOZ is omni-
present. You move from Uber to bookstore
to bar and hear it everywhere, pouring out
of cars, tying the scenes of the day together “You wouldn’t believe how far I had to go to find ice.”
as if they were links of andouille sausage.
The city pulses to its Louisiana-centric
rhythms: blues and zydeco, gospel and tra- quotes a friend who steers clear of society to your face. One is about garlic, another
ditional jazz, R&B and moony pop. The women because “they kissed as if they were about the appeal of gap-toothed women.
best thing about WWOZ is that you can sipping creme de menthe through a straw.” In another, Herzog, after losing a bet, is
stream it live on your home speakers. Turn KINGSLEY AMIS: The English novelist forced to eat his shoe. (Alice Waters of
it on when you’re cooking or cleaning or Kingsley Amis wrote many books worth Berkeley’s Chez Panisse bathed the shoe
if your weltanschauung is a bit wobbly, to knowing about, in many genres. The one for hours in garlic, herbs, and duck fat.)
quote a line from the poet A. R. Ammons. I return to most is Everyday Drinking, a See also: A Poem Is a Naked Person, about
WWOZ delivers a lot of shadoobies, to compendium of his writing about the art of the southern rocker Leon Russell. A favor-
steal an undervalued word from Mick Jag- making and consuming wine and cocktails. ite moment: when Russell devours a plate
ger in “Shattered.” Its sound will turn your This book brims with arcane wisdom; one of chicken, rice, and beans onstage as if to
day around. of his hangover cures is to read the final say, This is home.
SIGRID NUNEZ: I came late to the work lines from Milton’s Paradise Lost, another ALLISON JANAE HAMILTON: This young
of this witty and philosophical New York is to “go up for half an hour in an open aero- black American artist, born in Kentucky
City–born novelist. She published a book plane, needless to say with a non-hungover and raised in Florida and western Ten-
this year called The Friend, about a woman person at the controls.” If you are debating nessee, is one to watch. Her photographs,
who inherits, after the suicide of a friend, going on a diet, read this book irst. Heed sculptures, and installations are in touch
his harlequin Great Dane. This sounds like Amis’s core advice: “The irst, indeed the with folklore and myth yet they seem irre-
a setup for a romantic comedy, but Nunez only, requirement of a diet is that it should ducibly modern. She often employs taxi-
employs it as a pretext to talk superbly lose you weight without reducing your alco- dermy in her work, to sublime efect. See:
about everything: love and loss and writ- holic intake by the smallest degree.” her 2015 photograph The Hours, from a
ing and the #MeToo movement. The Friend SALLY TIMMS: Timms is one of the cen- series called Sweet Milk in the Badlands.
was so good it sent me back to her earlier tral members of the indispensable British- Hamilton’s irst solo show is currently at
novels, including A Feather on the Breath American rock band the Mekons, which MASS MoCA and pulling more than its
of God, about immigrants and ballet, and started as an art collective and is still thrill- own weight. This artist is turning over deep
Salvation City, about a near-apocalyptic ingly alive after more than forty years. soil. It’s hard not to look forward to what
plague. What’s the best feeling you can (Everyone has his or her favorite Mekons she does next.
have after reading a good book? The real- album. Mine, somewhat unorthodoxly, WILLIAM EGGLESTON: Born in Mem-
ization that, lo, this writer has a backlist I is So Good It Hurts, from 1988. Slip the phis, raised in Mississippi, Eggleston is
can dive into. songs “Ghosts of American Astronauts” the éminence grise of southern photogra-
A.J. LIEBLING: The four horsemen of Amer- and “Dora” into your current playlist.) phy. A house without one of his books in it
ican food writing are Calvin Trillin (The Timms’s solo albums, notably Cowboy Sally is barely a house. He’s credited with help-
Tummy Trilogy), Jim Harrison (The Raw and Cowboy Sally’s Twilight Laments for ing legitimize color photography, but it’s
and the Cooked), John Thorne (Outlaw Lost Buckaroos, are more than worthwhile. his darkly realistic eye for quotidian scenes
Cook), and A. J. Liebling (Between Meals). She bends Americana to her own strange, that swamps you over and over again. Let
If you are a serious feeder and aren’t famil- steely English whims. us turn for guidance to Eudora Welty,
iar with these books, then you are slacking. LES BLANK: Is it possible that Blank, a doc- who wrote that a typical Eggleston photo-
Liebling’s Between Meals is my sentimen- umentarian, was the most important ilm- graph might include “old tyres, Dr. Pep-
tal favorite among them. It’s an account of maker of the twentieth century? Some per machines, discarded air-conditioners,
this New Yorker writer’s apprenticeship as days I think so. He was certainly the fresh- vending machines, empty and dirty Coca-
an eater in Paris in the 1920s. Liebling con- est, funkiest, and most easygoing. He’s best Cola bottles, torn posters, power poles
tends that the rich are doomed to be dil- known for Burden of Dreams, an epic about and power wires, street barricades, one-
ettantes at the table because they’re not the tortured filming of Werner Herzog’s way signs, detour signs, No Parking signs,
forced to experiment and eat around the Fitzcarraldo. But it’s his smaller movies parking meters and palm trees crowding
margins. Above all, he’s good company. He that sting your curiosity and bring a smile the same kerb.” He is sui generis.
82 Se pt e m b e r 2 01 8 _ E sq u ire
REBEL, REBEL
Introducing the Uptown Maverick. Like a well-worn leather jacket, this street boot feels as good
as it looks. With a light, springy sole for a cushioned ride, you’re ready to zip up and step out.
CHE R R Y
AN EXCLUSIVE BY NICO WALKER
NOVEL: A SEA EXCERPT FRO
R I N G , B R U TA L M THE SEASON’S MO
, A L L-T O O - ST TA L K E D -A B
BY THE AUTHO A M E R I CA N TA OUT
R’S OWN DE- LE INSPIRED
SOLDIER TO H EVOLUTION FR
EROIN ADDICT OM STUDENT
AND BANK ROBBER AND
Photographs by ROBIN BROADBENT
EMILY’S GONE to take a shower. The room’s half-dark and I’m get- hands me a .45-caliber pistol wrapped in a blue rag; and I say, “Let me
ting dressed, looking for a shirt with no blood on it, not having any hold another gram.”
luck. The pants are fucked too—cigarette burns in the crotches. All He says okay. “This’ll make it seven twenty,” he says.
heroin chic, like I were famous already. “No problem.”
I go downstairs. Livinia pissed in the living room. There’s a lake of I get the scale for him, and he sets to weighing out a gram. I say, “It
piss. I say, “Livinia, goddamn,” yet low enough that she won’t hear me. was three light yesterday.”
She’s a good dog; just we’ve been some fucks about house-training her. He knows. But he doesn’t say anything. That’s how they do it: They
I get the paper towels and a bottle of spray. There’s a pack of Pall short you, they know they shorted you, and then they act like you’re the
Malls on the kitchen counter. I shake one loose and light it on the one who’s fucked up.
stove. I check the rigs in the cupboard. The rigs in the cupboard are “Remember I called you about it?”
all blood-used and crooked, like instruments of torture. And there are He remembers. But he’s got to make things stupid because he’s a
two lengths of nylon in the cupboard, and a box of Q-tips and a digital dope boy.
scale, two spoons with old cottons in them. The needles on the rigs are I say, “C’mon. Don’t be fucked-up. You said I owe you money for it
dull, but they’ll have to do. Emily has to be at school by ten, and it’ll be like it was right. And it isn’t like I’m not gonna have you together real
a close-run thing. There won’t be time to buy new rigs till afterward. soon.”
It’s twenty to nine but I think we’ll make it. Black should be on time He says okay.
today, and he’ll have something for us, so I’m not worried. I soak the I go to the stairs and call up to Emily. “Hey, sweetheart. Black’s here.
piss up with the paper towels. I wipe the spot down with disinfectant, Come down and do some of this dope with me.”
throw the used paper towels away. She says she’ll be down in a second.
Black pulls up in the driveway, and I let him in the side door. He I split the heroin up and set out some clean spoons: one for me, one
85
for my best girl. I ill a glass with water and There are three diferent kinds of ice trays: I GET in the car and back out into the
draw some out with a rig. I press the water out green, blue, and white. I ill them all up in the street. I’m behind Black at the light. I don’t
hard to break up any blood clots in the needle. sink and put them back in the freezer. especially like Black because he’s always on
I draw some more water out and add the some bullshit. Still, he’s alright as far as dope
water to the spoon. I hear Emily on the stairs, BLACK IS in the living room. I draw a boys go. All his brothers are in jail.
and I stir the heroin up with the water and go picture for him: “This is Lancashire, this is The arrow’s green and Black makes a left.
over to the stove. Emily says hi to Black. Black Hampshire, this is Coventry. I’ll park here, up I follow him and pass him going up Cedar.
says hi. I say to Emily, “That’s you over there past the stop sign, up past where it’s one-way. The morning is overcast, but it’s bright
on the counter.” You pick me up and take me over to Lan- nonetheless—a bright overcast morning! In
She says, “Thank you, baby.” cashire. Stop a couple buildings back from the just-spring! And maybe it will stay this way
I turn the burner on low and cook the shot corner and let me out. Then drive to the park- forever. It would be nice, but it’s a childish
on the lame till the shot starts to hiss a little; ing lot behind this storefront. Wait for me thing to wish for.
then I take it off. Emily’s rolled up a bit of I go past South Taylor, past the pharmacy,
cotton for me. She knows I’m in a hurry. Her past the abandoned KFC, past the Wendy’s,
hair is still wet. I take the cotton and drop it
into the spoon. The cotton turns dark and
“The rigs in the past the high school, past the movies, past Lee
Road, another pharmacy, more houses, and
swells. I draw the shot through the cotton and
lick the air out of the rig. What’s left in the
cupboard are all blood-used I’m twenty-ive years old and I don’t under-
stand what it is that people do. It’s as if all this
rig looks pretty dark.
She says, “Are you doing all yours right
and crooked, like were built on nothing, and nothing were hold-
ing this together. And then I hear people talk,
now?”
“Uh-huh.”
instruments of torture.” and that just makes things worse.
I didn’t make the light at Meadowbrook. I
“Are you sure that’s wise, baby?” turn right at Coventry and follow it down to
“It’ll be alright. If I can’t get more real soon there. I’ll be in and out real quick and I’ll come Hampshire and turn left. Here the street signs
then I don’t see as it’ll matter.” around through here. Then all you’ll have to do are painted to look like they’ve been tie-dyed.
It hurts a little extra when the needle’s dull is drive me up to where I parked and let me out I used to live here before they did that. Then
like this. It can make it hard to hit a vein. But and that’ll be that. We’ll meet back here, split I couldn’t anymore. It was like finding out
I hit a vein no problem, and this is a good the money up, yada yada yada. Sounds good?” you’d had some shit on your face the whole
omen. It’s going to be a lucky day. “Yeah. Sounds good.” time you’d been talking.
I shoot it. “So you’re up for it then?” I go up Hampshire where it’s one-way and
The taste comes on first; then the rush “Yeah.” the brick apartment buildings on either side.
starts. And it’s all about right, the warmth “Alright. Just give me a second and we’ll go. Some of the apartments have balconies. And
bleeding down through me. Till the taste Emily has to teach a class at ten.” the trees are nice. I don’t understand them
comes on stronger than usual, so strong She’s in the kitchen, feeling better now. either but I like them. I think I’d like them
it’s sickening. And I igure it out: how I was I say, “I’m heading out. I’ll be back in a all. It’d have to be a pretty fucked-up tree in
always dead, my ears ringing. minute.” order for me not to like it.
She says, “Be careful.” The lane is two-ways with houses on either
I’M ON the kitchen loor and my balls I say I’ll be careful. side after the stop. Some of the houses are
are cold. duplexes, some are single-family homes, and
Emily’s over me: “Come on.” WE LIVE on a street of red and white they all look nice, and there are more trees,
I lift my head. I look at Emily. I look at houses, where we don’t belong, Emily and and bigger ones. I turn around in the street
Black. Black is backed against the counter. I I. But we’re happy enough, though we’re and park at the curb. Black pulls up and I get
want to laugh in his face, but I can’t. often sad because we feel like we’re losing into his car. He cuts over and turns left onto
Emily’s hands are cold. “Talk to me!” everything. Lancashire. He drives down and stops a little
My pants are undone and there are ice Sometimes she gets to carrying on real loud ways back from the corner. There is nothing
cubes in my underwear. and screaming at me about shit like I can help more left to do now.
“Did you put ice cubes in my underwear?” it; and I have to say to her, “What the fuck is
“I thought you were going to die,” she says. wrong with you? Are you fucking crazy? Why SOMEWHERE ALONG the way I got into
“The day’s still young.” are you making all this noise like you’re being this, and it’s become a habit with me. One
And I see she’s about to cry. I say, “I’m murdered? Are you being murdered? Am I thing leads to another, leads to another.
sorry. I was only kidding. It was good of you murdering you? The neighbors will think I’m Things get better, they get worse. Then one
to do that. There’s no reason for you to be murdering you. And they’ll call the fucking day you’re all the way thrown out, before you
embarrassed. You did a good job.” police. And the police’ll come over here, and ever knew it was that serious. And you might
“You fucking piece of shit!” they’ll see me, and they’ll say, ‘This guy looks be crazy, and you might have a gun, but even
“Goddamn, lady. What do you want from like the one’s been doing all these fucking rob- then it’s usually no big deal.
me?” beries.’ And then I’ll go to fucking prison, and I have the door open and the car chimes.
I get up of the loor and I go to the sink and you’ll feel terrible.” “I’ll be quick, so you might as well start now.
start digging the ice cubes out of my under- And sometimes she says she’s sorry. Or You know where you’re going, right?”
wear. My cock can be seen; it’s cold, not sometimes she doesn’t say anything. Or “Yeah.”
making a good show of it. sometimes she punches me in the neck. And “Just make the irst left three times and you
“If I’d have known this was gonna happen I’ll say, “Ah, shit! Baby, why’d you punch me can’t go wrong.”
I’d have cut my pubic hair.” in the neck?” “Yeah.”
Black exits the kitchen. And she’ll run upstairs and lock her- “Are you sure you want to do this? Because
“Are you okay?” self in the bathroom and not come out for you don’t look like you do. It isn’t too late to
“I’m fine. Do yours, babe. We’re gonna hours while I’m downstairs crying my eyes change your mind.”
have to get you to school and it’s almost nine.” out over her. I love her so much it feels “I’m good.”
I pick the ice trays up from off the floor. like dying every time she does that. She’s a “Okay. I’ll meet you in the parking lot in
beauty and I tell her so all the time. I think about two minutes, give or take. Please be
86 Se pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _ E sq u ire she’d do anything for me. there.”
He says, “I got this.” The other teller laid $1,400 on the counter to go carrying in a hat, but this arrangement
“Too easy, right?” and said it was all she had. I remember the lie will have to work as I have a ways to go and I
“Too easy.” in her voice and thinking, This poor woman don’t want the gun trying to de-pants me in
thinks I’m retarded. But then what did I care? the getaway.
I’M ON the sidewalk. I’m an Indians hat She was pretty and it wasn’t like I wanted I walk down more steps that go into the
and a red scarf. I’m a blue hoodie and a white everything; I only ever wanted what was parking lot, carrying my hat, with the gun in
button-down shirt, some jeans, white Adidas, enough for now. my hat, with my hat in my left hand. There’s
nothing out of the ordinary. The gun is in my So now I’m robbing this teller and we’ve no one else in the parking lot when I cross it.
waist. I pull the scarf up before I go by the recognized each other and it isn’t a big deal. The gun in my hat still isn’t well hidden. I take
ATMs, and the scarf covers the lower half I don’t think she’s against me. I think maybe my scarf of while I’m walking and I ball it up
of my face. It’s a little late for it to do any we’re the same age. She’s pale as I am. And some and place it on top of the gun in my hat
good; I’ve been at this awhile now, and it’s no her hair is dark. Her eyes are blue with lecks and it’s a little better. Still there’s the money
secret what my face looks like. And here’s a of gold in them, and I could be in love with sticking out of my pockets; I’ll need to be care-
guy walking out and I’m at the door going in her if things had been different. And then ful that none falls out. I go left when I get to
and I’m not worried. I’m through the door, maybe we are somewhere. the sidewalk, and I’m walking up Hampshire.
and I have the gun out so everybody can see: I say, “I’m sorry.” They’ll be coming up Mayfield, and if they
“NO ALARMS. I’M A WANTED MAN. “That’s okay.” catch me I’m fucked.
THEY’LL KILL ME.” “What’s your name?” Sometimes I wonder if youth wasn’t wasted
“Vanessa.” on me. It’s not that I’m dumb to the beauty of
I’M ONLY kidding around. And I think “I’m sorry, Vanessa.” things. I take all the beautiful things to heart,
everybody knows as much. But this is never- “What’s your name?” and they fuck my heart till I about die from it.
theless a holdup, and I’ll need some money “You’re funny, Vanessa.” So it isn’t that. It’s just that something in me’s
before I’ll leave. She empties out the cash drawers quickly, always drawn me away, and it’s the singular
I walk to the counter, with the gun down which is good as I’m not trying to hang out— part of me, and I can’t explain it.
now so it’s pointed at the floor. There’s no there’s a police station not a quarter mile There’s nobody out here except me and
sense in making a big deal out of this. One from here. I take the stacks of money of the one other guy; he’s on the same sidewalk as I
thing about holding up banks is you’re mostly counter and shove them into my pockets. It am, coming toward me from the other end of
robbing women, so you don’t ever want to be looked alright: It doesn’t matter, it isn’t ever the block. We will meet eventually. I see he’s
rude. About 80 percent of the time, so long as very much. It’s like smash-and-grab, like hit- dressed like an old-timer, and that’s good: If
you’re not rude, the women don’t mind when and-run: The important thing is to get away. he’s old then I doubt he gives a fuck about
you hold up the bank; probably it breaks up The important thing is to run fast. what I’m up to. The important thing is don’t
the monotony for them. Of course there are I slam through the doors going out and act like you robbed a bank.
exceptions; about 20 percent have a bad out- round the corner, go past the ATMs. But I Act like you have places to go and people to
look. Like there was one lady, looked like don’t run back up the street; I turn and run see.
Janet Reno, wouldn’t come off a cent more behind the bank, past the dumpster, past the Act like you love the police.
than $1,800; she’d have seen everybody dead place where I used to live upstairs, then down Act like you never did drugs.
before she’d have come of another cent. She the steps in back of the almost vegetarian Act like you love America so much it’s
actually thought the bank was right. But this restaurant, to the chain-link fence. And the retarded.
was a fanatic. Usually the tellers are pretty parking lot is there, but I don’t see Black. And But don’t act like you robbed a bank.
cool: You give them a note or tell them you’re I’m not at all surprised as this is typical fuck- And don’t run.
there to do a robbery, and they go in the cash ing dope-boy behavior. The important thing is don’t run.
drawers and lay the money on the counter, The important thing is don’t run. The sirens coming up Mayield now, and the
and you take it and you leave and that’s all My car is a block away and I think I can grass is like a teenage girl. And the stoops!—
there is to it. Really it’s very civilized. It’s like make it. So this isn’t the end of the world. The the stoops are fucking wondrous! There’s a
a quiet joke you’ve shared with them. I say parking lot’s three sides where it’s walls and fuckload of starlings gone to war over a big
joke because in my case I don’t imagine there the walls full of windows looking down on me. wet juicy bag of garbage—look at them go!
was ever one to believe I’d do anything seri- I take my hat of and put the gun in my hat. The big swinging-dick starling’s got all the
ous if push came to shove, though I do make it The gun’s heavy on account of it’s full of bul- other starlings scared. He’ll be the one who
a point to try and at least look a little deranged lets. It’s full of bullets because I can’t imag- gets the choicest garbage!
because I don’t want anyone getting in trou- ine it being anything else. It’s really too heavy This is the beauty of things fucking my heart.
ble on account of me. I have a lot of sadness I wish I could lie down in the grass and chill for
in the face to make up for, so I have to make a while, but of course this is impossible; the gun
faces like I’m crazy or else people will think in my hat could be a little obvious, the money
I’m a pussy. The risk you run is that some- sticking out of all my pockets too. And the
times people think you’re a crazy pussy. But sirens telling everyone I’m a fucking scumbag.
I have to do what I can; otherwise her man- I bet they hope I’ll try something so they can
ager might say to her, “Why’d you give that drink my blood and tell their women about it.
pussy the money? You’re ired!” And she goes I say good morning to the old-timer. He
home and tells the kids there isn’t going to be says good morning. And if he suspects me of
any Christmas. wrongdoing, he is good enough not to men-
It doesn’t matter. Here is a teller. I say to tion it. We go about our business.
her, “It’s nothing personal.” I’m three-quarters there now.
And do you know we recognize each other! So maybe I get away.
There was another robbery, on the West Side, The author, Nico Walker, a former
And here come the sirens.
Lakewood, maybe a month ago (the days run Iraq-war medic with two years left in an eleven-year prison Here come their fucking gangsters.
together). I robbed the other teller, but she sentence for holding up a bank. The sirens screaming now, now turning.
was there too. It was funny how it happened. And I feel peaceful.
88 Excerpted from Cherry, by Nico Walker, to be published on August 14 by Alfred A. Knopf, an imprint of the Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Random House LLC.
HUGO BOSS FASHIONS INC. Phone +1 800 484 6267
2018 ic k s
e r y le
v
a S t
M of
SOMEWHERE along the way, guys
all started dressing alike. And they look
sharp, sure. But also. . . safe. Which is why
we’re here to lift up the rule breakers,
the renegades. The ones who can pull off
a salmon-colored suit or a bleached-blond
MOHAWK without batting an eye.
HERE’S to the EIGHT men
(and ONE woman) who
PROVE that there’s a lot to be
said for dressing dangerously.
PHOTOGRAPHS BY CAITLIN CRONENBERG STYLING BY M AT T H E W M A R D E N
93
Coat and trousers by Yohji Yamamoto; sneakers by Yohji Yamamoto x Adidas.
Ste
McQ ve
uee
TH
E
E
n
D i re
cto
r, 4
8
XA
C
EY TING
E
Style isn’t just about what leries for more than two
you’re drawn to—it’s about decades now, from quiet, sear-
where you come from. That’s ing works like Shame to the
director Steve McQueen’s take. unlinchingly brutal 12 Years
“I’m a working-class Londoner,” a Slave (which won the Oscar
he says. “When you think for Best Picture). You might ex-
of London, you think of pect someone with McQueen’s
rockers, punks, skinheads. The success to resist change, but
three-quarter pants, the you’d be underestimating him.
close-cropped hair. It’s very Up next is something entirely
London, whatever I do.” new. Widows, which he adapted
It’s itting that McQueen prefers from a British television show
clothing by designer Yohji with Gone Girl author Gillian
Yamamoto, whose avant-garde Flynn, will see a stacked cast of
approach taps into that women conspiring to settle a
same rebel energy. debt from their dead husbands’
“There’s an ease with his crimes. It’s a diferent story
clothes, and a kind of movement for McQueen to tell and a
interpreted in the fabric or in chance to take his directorial
the cut. It’s very much matched style in new directions.
to me and my body,” says “I’m looking for truth in what-
McQueen, who walked the run- ever I do,” he says. “I don’t like
way for Yamamoto in 2008. the idea of putting a stencil on a
The director has unveiled narrative. I want the narrative
visionary films in theaters and to tell me how it wants to be seen.”
art installations in swanky gal- —A drie nne We ste nfe ld
94
John Mulaney remembers the The comedian likes suits from
exact moment he decided to up- Paul Smith for their it, and
grade his stand-up uniform. because they come in shades that
He was performing in Atlanta, folks can spot from the cheap
wearing the same lannel-and- seats. “They have a great variety
jeans outit as everyone in the au- of popping-up-in-front-of-dark-
dience. “I thought, Oh! There’s curtains-colored suits,” he says.
no reason I should be talking up Not that a suit should be a
here,” he says. So while ilming his gimmick. If anything, Mulaney
irst Netlix special, New in Town, thinks guys should wear them
he decided he’d try out some more often.
tailoring. “It was funny to me to “If you’ve got a blazer, a dress
be a twenty-eight-year-old in a shirt, dress shoes, and then you
suit, yelling at everyone.” put on jeans? Just wear a suit,” he
Mulaney’s had an epic run ever says. “People say, ‘I don’t want
since, including national tours, to look too dressy,’ but unless it’s
a Broadway run alongside Nick a wedding that insists everyone
Kroll in Oh, Hello, voice work dress like Edward Sharpe
Right: Grooming by Sussy Campos using KEVIN.MURPHY & Milk Makeup. Left: Production by Danny Needham at Rosco Production. Grooming by Ciona Johnson-King at Aartlondon.
h n y
J o
n e
u l a n ,3
5
TI
N
dia
M Co
me
E ST S
WI
A RP NES
E SH USI
TH E B
TH
at t y
M LY
E A
H Mus
icia n, 29
THE
N
O DER
TM
P O S P S TA R
PO
Jacket, shirt, trousers, and sunglasses by Dior Men.
96
Is there any role
Right: Hair by Lona Vigi using Oribe. Makeup by Adam Breuchaud for Dior Beauty. Nails by Erin Moffett using Chanel Le Vernis. Location: The Chateau Marmont. Left: Production by Danny Needham at Rosco Production. Grooming by Ciona Johnson-King at Aartlondon.
Dress, boots, and ring by Givenchy.
Sarah Paulson can’t
inhabit? She’s played
conjoined twins, a medium,
a witch, and a journalist—and
that’s just in the American
Horror Story universe.
The actress resists categoriza-
tion on the red carpet, too, where
she’s shaking up Hollywood’s
predictable fashion scene. At the
London premiere of Ocean’s 8,
she wore a pink Valentino gown
that was equal parts arty and
feminine, then went punk for the
New York premiere in an electric
PaS A R
lime-green Prada number. “I look
like a giant highlighter,” she later
ul A H
joked. We call it a bright spot.
If anyone knows Paulson
at her core, it’s Ryan Murphy,
with whom she’s collaborated TH
soAc
t re
nonstop since Nip/Tuck in 2004.
The partnership isn’t likely
RE
E
D-
n ss
,4
3
to end anytime soon. “He makes
CH
AM CA
EL RP
me feel seen,” Paulson says. “You EO ET
N
don’t leave somewhere where
you’re being celebrated and chal-
lenged. It’s like being in a mar-
riage that works.” That marriage
has garnered Paulson six
Emmy nominations, and a win
for American Crime Story.
Paulson’s back on the big
screen next fall as part of the stel-
lar cast of The Goldfinch. She will
also return to another Murphy
project—playing Nurse Ratched
in a Netlix series exploring the
origin story of everyone’s favor-
ite battle-ax. We bet you’ll
hardly recognize her. —A. W.
Ludwig
GÖRANSSON
Composer, producer, 33
Left: Grooming by Sussy Campos using KEVIN.MURPHY & Milk Makeup. Right: Production by Danny Needham at Rosco Production. Grooming by Ciona Johnson-King at Aartlondon.
Style comes in stages. First, you
score a few compliments. Later,
friends ask, “Where’d you get
that?” When you’ve really
made it, people start stealing
your damn clothes. Swedish
composer Ludwig Göransson hit
that last level at his bachelor
party, when he briely left a suede
Lanvin jacket—wallet inside—
behind at a table. It was gone
when he came back. “It was a
fashion thief,” Göransson says,
since someone later found his
valuables. “Whoever took it just
wanted the jacket.”
Also in demand from Görans-
son? His virtuosic musical
abilities. He started out day-
jobbing the scores of New Girl
and Community and has since
evolved into an indispensable
collaborator to the likes of
Childish Gambino, Ryan Coogler,
and Chance the Rapper. Not
necessarily what you’d expect
from an artist who hails from
the land of EDM. (You can
thank Donald Glover for the
introduction to rap.) Göransson
mashed modern hip-hop into
the Rocky theme for Creed, laid
down Black Panther’s thump-
ing afrobeats, and coproduced
Gambino’s next-level hit “This
Is America,” which is why you
could see him in anything from
a dashiki to a bomber jacket.
“When I go into the studio,
I’m trying to dress up to the
way I want my music to
sound,” he says. “It makes it
easier to connect and create.”
Jacket, shirt, trousers, and tie by Boss; Gucci ring and vintage signet ring, Göransson’s own.
—Brady Langmann
B il l Y
H
NIG o r, 6
8
Act GE
H AN
K- C
UIC T
TIS
E Q
TH
A R
Suit by Thom Sweeney; shirt by Margaret Howell; tie by Drake’s; loafers by Church’s.
99
Brian
T YREE
Henry
Actor, 36
THE SCENE-STEALER
Left: Grooming by Ruth Fernandez. Right: Grooming by Jodie Boland using Lab Series Skincare for Men.
and the toll of carrying his
entourage. This fall, he’ll appear
in both Steve McQueen’s Wid-
ows and Barry Jenkins’s If Beale
Street Could Talk.
There is a scene in the Atlanta
episode “Woods” in which
Alfred’s girlfriend tries to per-
suade him to buy a pair of velvet
slippers. Henry would need no
convincing. The actor is given
to bold prints, statement jewelry,
and velvet evening jackets.
“When I enter a room, I want
you to know I entered,” he says.
When asked about his acting
Suit and shirt by Boss; sneakers by Vans; jewelry, Henry’s own.
idols, his answer is just as decisive
(and unexpected). “Laurie Metcalf
is the—capital THE, underline
the—actor that I was like, ‘I want
to be her.’ ” —Ash Carter
10 0
Few theatrical mo-
ments match the
conclusion of Henrik
Ibsen’s A Doll’s House, when
housewife Nora Helmer slams
the door on her marriage and
her children. For decades, play-
wrights have taken unsuccessful
stabs at dreaming up what
happened next. Then came
Lucas Hnath, who took his au-
dacious sequel, A Doll’s House,
Part 2, all the way to Broadway,
and a landmark eight Tony nomi-
nations. A gutsy high-low
fusion, the new play finds Nora
knocking on that same door
LU a t to demand a divorce.
Hnath cites his Orlando child-
H n wr
igh
t, 38
IS T
hood as one of his greatest inlu-
ences. “I grew up seven minutes
Pla
y
S I ON from Disney World,” he says.
Jacket by Maison Margiela; shirt by Bottega Veneta; trousers by Coach 1941; belt by Gucci.
An artist can ind their
inspiration anywhere.
Raúl de Nieves found his in a
pair of heels. “I thought it would
be funny to wear them to a punk
show. People called me Grandma,
but it also made me more
approachable, because it started
a conversation,” he says. He then
Coat, vest, and shirt by Versace; jewelry, de Nieves’s own. Casting by Emily Poenisch.
102
BOSS 0969
Henry Cavill
#SharpenYourFocus
boss.com
From his $20-million-a-year perch at Today, Matt Lauer
turned NBC into his personal playground.
THEN, SUDDENLY, HE WAS GONE.
10 4
BIRDMEN
From left:
Mark Halperin,
Andy Lack, Tom
Brokaw, Matt
Lauer, Billy
Bush, and Noah
Oppenheim.
BY
David
Usborne
o
e
ru
le
n-u
ad
p
in
R
to
I
M
C
pu
th
A
S
n
e
RVE
UL
w
m
L’
L
ay
o
S
I
st
V
V
o
A
f
e
f
n
N
-s
o
c
m
ri
—
pt.
T R A ed d t y s
wa s S ’s stori s agree the da
p l an rd y a ctor T hen
a .
The f TOM H t intense metown
ole o mo s is h o
b le r f o ur r o f h
i
vis one o rcycle tou
a m oto
on
upper-middle-class community, the only child
of Chips, an adman and writer, and Ann, an
artist. His parents still live nearby.
“Ready for the ive-dollar tour?” he asks.
Photographs by Our plan is to trace the path from what he calls
TWO WHEELS AND A GRAVEL ROAD Jacket and jeans by Belstaff; T-shirt by Alternative Apparel; boots by Triumph; sunglasses by Carrera. 111
S
Y ER DS
LA :
U
SA e.
Y E TUS d ) ng
S ha
AN FAL DAME eate rue ani Ex
! c
M R A h (T rm
F
O E Os at M as a uch. irt by A
AN TR enes on h n to ni; T-s
U h
M lik nd ca ma
A ’y s Lo ou io Ar
rd in o y iorg
Ha rs s by G
o
t ser
u
d tro
an
at
Co
they’re getting to know the real Tom. “Should to put everything on hold.” A smile cracks another bearded, inked-up passerby. He’s
we fuck of?” he asks as we pull on our gear. across his face. “Welcome to my neighbor- wearing a loose T-shirt and cargo pants with
Except for the beat-up jeans, his ive-foot- hood. I told you there’s always something to enough pockets to it all the world. Brown
nine frame is covered in black, from his hel- ind behind the Laura Ashley curtains.” fuzz dusts the crown of his head. A copper
Private
met to his motorcycle boots. We get on our beard stippled with gray blankets the lower
bikes and fuck of. half of his face.
Five minutes later, just past the prep school He answers my irst question—how he’s
he attended as a boy, Hardy spots a commo- doing—without missing a beat: “I’m tired.”
tion, and we pull over. A woman, blood cov- Tom and Public Hardy: These are the He’s been working a lot, mostly on Marvel’s
ering her face, lies faceup, half on the side- two sides that deine him. That his time is split Venom (October 5), in which he plays the
walk and half in the street. A few bystanders between work life and family life, and that title role, a reporter named Eddie Brock whose
are crouched around. As Hardy approaches, his obligations toward both are sometimes body is hijacked by an alien symbiote. Venom
he says, “I know her.” at odds, isn’t unique. However, his steadfast has remained one of Spider-Man’s best-known
MAE,
struggle to separate them is; he’d be thrilled foes since he irst appeared in comic-book form
‘DON’T
of your best mates, and I love you.” a heart of gold in the BBC’s Stuart:
He slips money into Albert’s pocket. A Life Backwards (2007), for which
“Just for now,” he says. As soon as the he shed nearly thirty pounds, and
ambulance leaves, bound for Kings- the most violent inmate in Britain in
ton Hospital, he calls Albert’s wife. Bronson (2009), for which he packed
For the half hour we’ve been here, on ifteen pounds of muscle.
do THAT,’
Hardy has not stopped moving. He’s Physical change is just part of
talked himself through each step Hardy’s exacting, chameleonlike
as if checking of boxes on a crisis transformations. “One can em-
to-do list. Suddenly, he turns to me bellish with lair or an accent,” he
and considers our circumstances. We says. “But ultimately you need to
began the day as writer and subject, ground the character in some form of
but that dynamic dissolved the mo- MY INSTINCT IS recognizable truth.” Hardy will talk
ment he saw Mae. “There was no in-
terview here,” he says. “We ind our-
TO SAY, your ear of about acting theory—
Stanislavsky versus Adler, presenta-
selves in a situation where we needed ‘THAT HAS TO BE DONE.’” tion versus representation, the use of
114
E
“Sou ASY B
n E
Hard ds like I N G G
in po y half- a R
jokes lot of p E E N
tent
Suit a ial fr abou ress
nd sh a n chis t his lea ure,”
irt by e sta d
rter role
Gucc
i; vint
age t Veno
ie, sty
list’s
own. m.
children, are beginning to outweigh its di- brush, a view of the Thames, a tree with mopeds were T-boned at an intersection and
minishing gratiication. When I ask if being knotted bark—he raises two ingers to his tried to run, Hardy, who lived nearby, ap-
forty has changed how he feels about his eyes in a V, then points so I see it too, like I’m prehended one of them. The Sun headline
career, this time he answers in the second his Dunkirk wingman. sums up how the press covered the incident:
person. “You’ve summited Everest. It’s a We pull over at a dead end. With our en- “Tom Hardy Catches Thief After Dramatic
miracle that you’ve made it anywhere near gines rumbling, Hardy tells me that his par- Hollywood-Style Chase Through Streets Be-
the fucking mountain, let alone climbed it. ents moved to this part of London to enroll fore Proudly Saying, ‘I’ve Caught the C**t.’ ”
Do you want to go all the way back and do it him in the best schools they could aford. The He disputes the details of what was reported—
again? Or do you want to get of the moun- area is among the wealthiest in the UK, but it’s “It wasn’t much of a chase; when I found him,
tain and go fucking ind a beach?” He tugs his also an economic patchwork where council he was in fucking rag order”—but that’s be-
left temple so hard that it looks like the skin houses sit blocks away from mansions. “Grow- side the point. The tabloids missed the real
might tear. “What is it that draws you to the ing up, you mix and mingle. You can sit in the story: After the incident, he tracked down the
craft? At this age, I don’t know anymore. I’ve shit if you want to, or you can make something kid he turned in and got him help. “He must
kind of had enough. If I’m being brutally hon- of yourself,” he says. “Or you can end up un- stand accountable for what he’s done,” Hardy
est, I want to go on with my life.” der too much pressure and fading out young.” tells me. “But he’s got issues, and he’s in a bad
As a child, Hardy had a strong relationship way. Do we just give up on a sixteen-year-old?”
A F T E R ThE
ambulance leaves with Mae and Albert,
with Ann, but he butted heads with Chips.
Father and son made up years ago, and Hardy
resists going into detail about their diicult
past. “My father was the most wonderful of
As a boy, Hardy was given second, third, and
fourth chances. Along the way, he discovered
that acting ofered an outlet for his baneful dis-
content. He attended one drama school, then
Hardy suggests that we stop at a few places teachers in a world that can be cruel,” he al- another, got kicked out twice, and was cast in
on our way to the hospital. Not for my ben- lows. “He treated me like an adult, as opposed Band of Brothers before he graduated.
eit, but for his friend’s. “Albert needs to be to changing his persona for his child. There Still, for years, he questioned his chosen
alone with his mum and his thoughts,” he says. was no ilter. Do you understand? No ilter.” path. Hardy even signed up for a Parachute
“He’s going to be taking care of her, so it’s im- In his teens, Hardy wobbled. “The cen- Regiment training course—but never fol-
portant he pays attention. Sometimes, when trifugal force in my life is a natural dispo- lowed through. “Oh, mate, I did so much
there are other people around, that’s hard to sition to not be happy with the way I feel,” backpedaling,” he says. “The reality is that
do.” Hardy isn’t trying to swashbuckle; he’s he says. That, combined with a robust con- where I belonged was not there. The last per-
thinking of how to best help two loved ones. trarian bent—“Nine times out of ten, when son defending the realm was Mr. Hardy.”
And, apparently, a guy he just met: Look- somebody says, ‘Don’t do that,’ my instinct He calls the decision to back out “one of my
ing me up and down, he says, “We’ve had a is to say, ‘That has to be done’ ”—got him biggest regrets. I wonder what life would’ve
bit of a shock ourselves. We could use some into a fair bit of trouble. He hung out with the been like. I would’ve loved to have served
sugar.” We set out for a refreshment stand wrong crowds; he fought in school. “I grew and been useful.”
in a nearby park he irst came to as a toddler up in the neighborhood being a dick,” he says. In 2003, at twenty-ive, Hardy cleaned up
with his mother to paddle around the kid- “I’ve learned and will continue to learn from with the help of a twelve-step program—
die pool, and then as a teen with Albert and being a dick. To try and somehow chisel my- he calls it “my irst port of call”—and he’s
others to play rugby. self into being a human being so I can respect been sober ever since. “It was hard enough
When we arrive, the stand is closed. As we myself when I look in the mirror. And that’s a for me to say, ‘I’m an alcoholic.’ But staying
get back on our bikes, a father walks by carry- procedure that will go on until I die.” stopped is fucking hard.” Sitting on his Tri-
ing his son, a chubby boy with an explosion of Starting at thirteen, he struggled with al- umph, at the center of the place that held all
straw-colored curls. “How old are you?” Hardy coholism and other addictions. He still has the risks and possibilities that would deine
asks the boy. a soft spot for those with similar demons. him, Hardy sounds almost wistful.
“He’s two,” the dad beams. In April 2017, when two kids riding stolen We take of through the park. He rides with
“When will you be three?” his legs bowed out, his left hand rest-
Hardy asks. ing on his knee, and his right hand
“July,” the toddler says softly. “YOU’VE SUMMITED holding steady on the throttle. When
“That’s really soon!” he says. E V E R E ST. he rips on a vape pen, white plumes
DO YoU
“You’re a bit older than my young- swirl around his head and dissipate
est, who’ll be three in October. Oh, into the damp air.
you’ll be a big boy by then. You’re
already a big boy. Do you want to sit
on my bike?” The boy buries his face WE HEAD to Richmond.
WANT To DO
in his father’s chest. “I appreciate The town sits within the borders of
I’ve made you feel nervous. This is Greater London, but its roots are
what I will do: I will disappear,” he as much in the countryside as in the
says, which could double as his two- city. Generations of famous Brits
sentence acting manifesto. He revs
his engine over and over. As we de-
part, the boy watches Hardy, his
mouth agape.
IT AGaIN?
BRUTALLY
IF I’M BEING
seeking refuge have called it home:
Queen Elizabeth I liked hunting
stags in the park; Charles I relocated
his court here to avoid the plague;
We cut into Richmond Park, a Mick Jagger lived near the Thames
twenty-ive-hundred-acre expanse
that’s equal parts polished and un- HONEST, I WANT TO GO with Jerry Hall, who, though now
married to Rupert Murdoch, appar-
tamed. When something catches
Hardy’s attention—stags in the ON WITH MY LIFE.” ently still co-owns the home they
shared. (c ont i nu e d on p a ge 1 52)
116 Se pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _E sq u ire
“I g CAN
rew NO
up N B
tinu I’ve lea . . . bei A L L
con
e to rned ng
a
!
Jum lear a d
n fro nd wi i
ll ck.
psu
it b
y Al mb
pha
Indu
eing
stri a di
es. ck.”
Lighting the Bonfire
Tom Wolfe died this past spring at the age of eighty-eight. Before he became famous for best sellers
The Right Stuf and The Bonire of the Vanities, he was one of the greatest magazine writers who ever lived,
and certainly the most indelible stylist. His first signature story for a national magazine appeared in these pages
in 1963. After having a pitch about tipping turned down, Wolfe was sent to Los Angeles to visit a custom-car
show but got writer’s block. Faced with a deadline, his editor, Byron Dobell, asked Wolfe to provide enough
information for him to write text to accompany a photograph. Wolfe stayed up all night and handed him a
long memo. Dobell made a few amendments, removed “Dear Byron,” and proclaimed it “an astonishing piece.”
Three excerpts by Tom Wolfe
From “There Goes (Varoom! Varoom!) mous. And there is a Chris-Craft cabin cruiser practically religious about it. For example,
in the pool, going around and around, send- the dancers: none of them ever smiled. They
That Kandy Kolored (Thphhh-hhh!)
ing up big waves, with more of these boufant stared at each other’s legs and feet, concen-
Tangerine-Flake Streamline Baby . . .,” babies bunched in the back of it. In the water, trating. The dances had no grace about them
November 1963 suspended like plankton, are kids in Scuba- at all, they were more in the nature of a hoe-
diving outfits; others are tooling around down, but everybody was concentrating to do
THE FIRST good look I had at customized underwater, breathing through a snorkel. And them exactly right. And the boufant kids all
cars was at an event called a “Teen Fair,” all over the place are booths, put up by shoe had form, wild form, but form with rigid stan-
held in Burbank, a suburb of Los Angeles companies and guitar companies and God dards, one gathers. Even the boys. Their dress
beyond Hollywood. This was a wild place to knows who else, and there are kids dancing was prosaic—Levis, Slim Jims, sport shirts,
be taking a look at art objects—eventually, I in all of them—dancing the bird, the hully- T-shirts, polo shirts—but the form was con-
should say, you have to reach the conclusion gully, and the shampoo—with the music of the sistent: a stovepipe silhouette. . . . I went by
that these customized cars are art objects, at hully-gully band piped all over the park one of the guitar booths, and there was a little
least if you use the standards applied in a civ- through loudspeakers. kid in there, about thirteen, playing the hell
ilized society. But I will get to that in a mo- All this time, Tex Smith, from Hot Rod out of an electric guitar. The kid was named
ment. Anyway, about noon you drive up to a Magazine, who brought me over to the place, Cranston something or other. He looked like
place that looks like an outdoor amusement is trying to lead me to the customized-car he ought to be named Kermit or Herschel; all
park, and there are three serious-looking exhibit—“Tom, I want you to see this car that his genes were kind of horribly Okie. Cran-
kids, like the cafeteria committee in high Bill Cushenberry built, The Silhouette”— ston was playing away and a big crowd was
school, taking tickets, but the scene inside which is to say, here are two hundred kids watching. But Cranston was slouched back
is quite mad. Inside, two things hit you. The ricocheting over a platform at high noon, with his spine bent like a sapling up against a
irst is a huge platform a good seven feet of and a speedy little boat barreling around table, looking gloriously bored. At thirteen,
the ground with a hully-gully band—every- and around and around in a round swim- this kid was being fanatically cool. They all
thing is electriied, the bass, the guitars, the ming pool, and I seem to be the only per- were. They were all wonderful slaves to form.
saxophones—and (two) behind the band, on son who is distracted. The customized-car They have created their own style of life, and
the platform, about two hundred kids are do- exhibit turns out to be the Ford Custom Car they are much more authoritarian about en-
ing frantic dances called the hully-gully, the Caravan, which Ford is sending all over the forcing it than are adults. Not only that, but
bird, and the shampoo. As I said, it’s noon- country. At irst, with the noise and peripheral today these kids—especially in California—
time. The dances the kids are doing are very motion and the inchoate leching you are lia- have money, which, needless to say, is why all
jerky. The boys and girls don’t touch, not even ble to be doing, what with boufant nymphets these shoe merchants and guitar sellers and
with their hands. They just ricochet around. rocketing all over the place, these customized the Ford Motor Company were at a Teen Fair
Then you notice that all the girls are dressed cars do not strike you as anything very special. in the irst place. I don’t mind observing that
exactly alike. They have boufant hairdos— Obviously they are very special, but the irst it is this same combination—money plus
all of them—and slacks that are, well, skin- thing you think of is the usual—you know, slavish devotion to form—that accounts for
tight does not get the idea across; it’s more that the kids who own these cars are proba- Versailles or St. Mark’s Square. Naturally, most
the conformation than how tight the slacks bly skinny little hoods who wear T-shirts and of the artifacts that these kids’ money-plus-
are. It’s as if some lecherous old tailor with carry their cigarette packs by winding them form produce are of a pretty ghastly order.
a gluteus-maximus ixation designed them, around in the T-shirt up near the shoulder. But so was most of the paraphernalia that
striation by striation. About the time you’ve But after a while, I was glad I had seen the cars developed in England during the Regency. I
managed to focus on this, you notice that out in this natural setting, which was, after all, a mean, most of it was on the order of starched
in the middle of the park is a huge, perfectly kind of Plato’s Republic for teenagers. Because cravats. . . . But the Regency period did see
round swimming pool; really rather enor- if you watched anything at this fair very long, some tremendous formal architecture. And
you kept noticing the same thing. These kids the kids’ formal society has also brought at
118 Se pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _ E sq u ire are absolutely maniacal about form. They are least one substantial thing to a formal devel-
HE HAD LIFTOFF Wolfe, in an atypical dark jacket, classing up an otherwise forlorn stretch of Cape Kennedy, 1972.
opment of a high order—the customized cars. Partly I am on the lookout for the meta- outfit in Mountain View, California, he encoun-
I don’t have to dwell on the point that cars phors of the future. The metaphors we use tered a way of doing business that was nothing
mean more to these kids than architecture did today are pretty worn out. We still talk about short of radical.
in Europe’s great formal century, say, 1750 people with hatchet faces and craggy brows,
to 1850. They are freedom, style, sex, power, for example, even though the number of peo- From “The Tinkerings of Robert
motion, color—everything is right there. ple who ever use hatchets or look up at crags
anymore must be small. We still read about
Noyce,” December 1983
Wolfe, raised in Richmond, Virginia, with “stone-faced” Ed Sullivan. We still read about
a Ph.D. in American studies from Yale, was “barking up the wrong tree,” “an ax to grind,” One day John Carter came to Mountain View
something of an outsider in the statuspheres “a pig in a poke,” “a tough row to hoe,” all of for a close look at Noyce’s semiconductor
of New York and California society that he which is out of the old-homestead past. That operation. Carter’s oice in Syosset, Long
detailed with such relish and wit. But he didn’t is why I read Architectural Record a lot, for ex- Island, arranged for a limousine and chaufeur
delve into the most fashionable subjects of the ample. I am fascinated with the new mate- to be at his disposal while he was in California.
moment—civil rights, the war in Vietnam, rials that are going into buildings. I am sure So Carter arrived at the tilt-up concrete build-
women’s lib. Instead, he celebrated stock-car they will eventually be as natural to us as the ing in Mountain View in the back of a black
drivers and, later, astronauts as true heroes standbys we are used to, wood, stone, brick Cadillac limousine with a driver in the front
at a time when there was nothing less hip than and plaster. Already in this country they are wearing the complete chaufeur’s uniform—
the space program. In this brief 1967 essay, he making roofs of laminated glue purlina with a the black suit, the white shirt, the black neck-
displayed his wide-ranging curiosity, describ- little extruded vinyl inishing here and there, tie, and the black visored cap. That in itself was
ing how he gathered information from dis- walls of transparent acrylic, loors of mag- enough to turn heads at Fairchild Semicon-
parate sources, almost as if he were trying to nesite, Ultralor and Ruberoid Royal Stone- ductor. Nobody had ever seen a limousine and
create for himself a prototype Internet. glow. Hell, tomorrow it may be possible to a chaufeur out there before. But that wasn’t
use beautiful twentieth-century metaphorical what ixed the day in everybody’s memory. It
From “How You Can Be sobriquets like Ruberoid Royal Stoneglow was the fact that the driver stayed out there for
as Well-Informed as Tom Wolfe,” Ed Sullivan and everybody will know what almost eight hours, doing nothing. He stayed
you mean (“The Look of Stone, The Practi- out there in his uniform, with his visored hat
November 1967 cality of Vinyl Asbestos”). . . . on, in the front seat of the limousine, all day,
In Electrical World I see that during the riot doing nothing but waiting for a man who was
I used to read three, four papers a day when I in Detroit, the utility company, Detroit Edi- somewhere inside. John Carter was inside hav-
worked on newspapers here. That was mainly son, sent crewmen in to repair 61 poles, 27 ing a terriic chief executive oicer’s time for
to keep up with what little was going on in transformers, 41 additional capacity fuses, himself. He took a tour of the plant, he held
our poor old fading craft. I don’t ind any pa- 30 4800-volt primary spans and 21 second- conferences, he looked at igures, he nodded
per worth going over every day now. You can ary spans. The company told them that no one with satisfaction, he beamed his urbane Fifty-
get the news a day earlier, usually, and almost had to go into the riot area if he didn’t want to. seventh Street Biggie CEO charm. And the
as fully, on the radio. . . . As for truly original Yet of eighty linemen on the crew—the men driver sat out there all day engaged in the task
and enterprising reporting, it is almost all in most exposed to the snipers—there was only of supporting a visored cap with his head. Peo-
magazines today. . . . one man absent the whole time, and he had just ple started leaving their workbenches and go-
I look at a whole lot of monthly and quar- been in the hospital for an operation. Whatever ing to the front windows just to take a look at
terly magazines, hobbyists’ magazines, socio- may explain this gung ho performance by a this phenomenon. It seemed that bizarre. Here
logical and psychological journals, car maga- group of union wage earners in the year 1967 was a serf who did nothing all day but wait out-
zines, sports magazines; you never know what interests me as much as the cause of the riot. side a door in order to be at the service of the
nice bijoux you are going to ind. But the ones haunches of his master instantly, whenever
I would particularly like to mention are the One of Wolfe’s final magazine profiles, “The Tin- those haunches and the paunch and the jowls
trade magazines. They contain all sorts of kerings of Robert Noyce: How the Sun Rose in might decide to reappear. It wasn’t merely that
information about the new artifacts and general Silicon Valley,” is also one of his best. Though he this little peek at the New York–style corpo-
look and feel of life in this country. I know of eschewed his usual pyrotechnics in favor of more rate high life was unusual out here in the brown
no other way you can read about it. straightforward prose, his instinct for the story hills of the Santa Clara Valley. It was that it
Partly it’s curiosity. In Concrete Construction, everyone else was missing remained intact. When seemed terribly wrong.
for example, I see that the American Smelting this long profile appeared in 1983, in the nascent A certain instinct Noyce had about this
and Reining Company has built a concrete days of the personal-computer revolution, most new industry and the people who worked in it
chimney 828 feet high at its plant near El Paso, people thought of the tech industry as a field for began to take on the outlines of a concept.
Texas. In other words, about eighty stories hopeless nerds, if they thought about tech at all. Corporations in the East adopted a feudal
high, or thirty stories higher than the Wash- (And this was before nerds were cool.) But Wolfe approach to organization, without even be-
ington Monument. It is a rather great-looking grasped the magnitude of the industry’s role in ing aware of it. There were kings and lords,
object. It is only sixty-two feet wide at the base business as well as its potential to transform the and there were vassals, soldiers, yeomen, and
and tapers up, up, up, up. Every day, while they way we live. Here he profiles serfs, with layers of protocol
were building it, some guy would look down Robert Noyce, who coinvented and perquisites, such as the car
the chimney with a bomb-sight-style instru- the integrated circuit and You’ll want to read the rest of and driver, to symbolize supe-
ment to see if it was coming up straight. I won- cofounded Fairchild Semicon- Tom Wolfe’s masterpieces in full. riority and establish the bound-
der what it felt like to look down the damn ductor and Intel—in the process We’ve digitized every story from ary lines. Back east the CEOs
thing every day, say, from forty stories up and fostering a corporate culture that every issue in our trailblazing had oices with carved panel-
eighty-five-year catalog. Read
so on. I wonder if he got to dreading it or if it still holds in Silicon Valley. But in the rest—and dig up some more ing, fake ireplaces, escritoires,
was a big deal. I wonder what would have hap- the early sixties, when the CEO gems while you’re at it—at bergères, leather-bound books,
pened if his vision had been of and the things of Fairchild’s New York–based classic.esquire.com. and dressing rooms, like a suite
started going in an ever-so-slight spiral. parent company visited Noyce’s in a baronial manor house. Fair-
120 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _E sq u ire
1 the silicon frontier! Noyce was determined
(1) In New York City, 1965. (2) Wolfe’s
car-culture piece as it appeared in Esquire’s to maintain that spirit during the expansion
November 1963 issue. (3) The assignment card for phase. And for the time being, at least, here
a 1964 profile of Cassius Clay. ($850? Deal!) in the early 1960s, the notion of a permanent
start-up operation didn’t seem too farfetched.
Fairchild was unable to coast on the tremen-
dous advantage Noyce’s invention of the
integrated circuit had provided. Competitors
were setting up shop in the Santa Clara Valley
2 like gold rushers. . . .
The atmosphere of the new companies was
so democratic, it startled businessmen from
the East. Some ifty-ive-year-old biggie with
his jowls swelling up smoothly from out of
his F. R. Tripler modiied-spread white col-
lar and silk jacquard-print necktie would call
up from GE or RCA and say, “This is Harold
B. Thatchwaite,” and the twenty-three-year-
old secretary on the other end of the line, out
in the Silicon Valley, would say in one of those
sunny blond pale-blue-eyed California voices:
“Just a minute, Hal, Jack will be right with you.”
And once he got to California and met this Jack
for the irst time, there he would be, the CEO
himself, all of thirty-three years old, wearing
3 no jacket, no necktie, just a checked shirt, khaki
pants, and a pair of moccasins with welted
seams the size of jumper cables. Naturally
the irst sounds out of this Jack’s mouth would
be: “Hi, Hal.”
It was the 1960s, and people in the East were
hearing a lot about California surfers, Califor-
nia bikers, hot rodders, car customizers, Cali-
fornia hippies, and political protesters, and the
picture they got was of young people in jeans
and T-shirts who were casual, spontaneous,
impulsive, emotional, sensual, undisciplined,
and obnoxiously proud of it. So these semicon-
ductor outits in the Silicon Valley with their
CEOs dressed like camp counselors struck
child Semiconductor needed a strict operating ing his white lab coat. Noyce came to work in them as the business versions of the same thing.
structure, particularly in this period of rapid a coat and tie, but soon the jacket and the tie They couldn’t have been more wrong. The
growth, but it did not need a social structure. were of, and that was ine for any other man new breed of the Silicon Valley lived for work.
In fact, nothing could be worse. Noyce realized in the place too. There were no rules of dress They were disciplined to the point of back
how much he detested the eastern corporate at all, except for some unwritten ones. Dress spasms. They worked long hours and kept
system of class and status with its endless gra- should be modest, modest in the social as well working on weekends. They became absorbed
dations, topped of by the CEOs and vice-pres- as the moral sense. At Fairchild there were no in their companies the way men once had in
idents who conducted their daily lives as if they hard-worsted double-breasted pinstripe suits the palmy days of the automobile industry... .
were a corporate court and aristocracy. He re- and shepherd’s-check neckties. Sharp, elegant, Noyce used to go into a slow burn . . . when
jected the idea of a social hierarchy at Fairchild. fashionable, or alluring dress was a social blun- the newspapers, the magazines, and the
Not only would there be no limousines and der. Shabbiness was not a sin. Ostentation was. television networks got on the subject of
chaufeurs, there would not even be any re- During the start-up phase at Fairchild Semi- the youth. The youth was a favorite topic in
served parking places. Work began at eight conductor there had been no sense of bosses 1968. Riots broke out on the campuses as the
A.M. for one and all, and it would be irst come, and employees. There had been only a com- antiwar movement reached its peak following
irst served, in the parking lot, for Noyce...and mon sense of struggle out on a frontier. Every- North Vietnam’s Tet ofensive. Black youths
everybody else. “If you come late,” Noyce liked one had internalized the goals of the venture. rioted in the cities. . .. The press seemed to en-
to say, “you just have to park in the back forty.” They didn’t need exhortations from superi- joy presenting these youths as the avant-garde
And there would be no baronial oice suites. ors. Besides, everyone had been so young! who were sweeping aside the politics and
The gloriied warehouse on Charleston Road Noyce, the administrator or chief coordina- morals of the past and shaping America’s
was divided into work bays and a couple of rows tor or whatever he should be called, had been future. The French writer Jean-François Revel
of cramped oice cubicles. The cubicles were just about the oldest person on the premises, toured American campuses and called the
never improved. The decor remained Glori- and he had been barely thirty. . . . radical youth homo novus, “the New Man,” as
ied Warehouse, and the doors were always The spirit of the start-up phase! My God! if they were the latest, most advanced product
open. Half the time Noyce, the chief adminis- Who could forget the exhilarations of the past of human evolution itself, after the manner
trator, was out in the laboratory anyway, wear- few years! To be young and free out here on of the superchildren (c ont i nu e d on p a ge 1 53)
GIVE THAT This page:
Coat, jacket,
HANDSOME MUG A REST. sweater, and
trousers by Louis
THE LATEST PIECES Vuitton; shoes
($770) by Fratelli
Rossetti.
FROM LABELS LIKE
Opposite:
VUITTON, Trench coat
($2,795), jacket
VERSACE, AND ($1,795), shirt
($550), and tie
PRADA ($175) by Versace.
ARE SO FRESH
YOU WON’T
HAVE TO RELY ON YOUR
GOOD LOOKS.
Photographs by
JEREMY LIEBMAN
Styling by
NICK SULLIVAN
1 23
This page:
Jacket ($7,900),
sweater ($1,750),
and trousers
($790) by Bottega
Veneta; hat by
Borsalino.
Opposite:
Jacket ($2,620),
shirt ($1,120),
and tie ($270) by
Prada.
SUIT JACKET
OR FLIGHT
JACKET? WHEN
TAILORING
AND SPORTSWEAR
BOTH LOOK THIS
GOOD, THERE’S
NO NEED
TO TAKE SIDES.
1 25
126
This page:
Jacket ($1,700),
turtleneck sweater
($990), trousers
($490), and boots
($1,095) by Etro.
Right: Jacket ($1,790),
turtleneck sweater,
shirt ($690), trousers
($830), and shoes
($995) by Salvatore
Ferragamo.
Opposite:
Jacket ($1,200),
turtleneck sweater
($820), ski pants
($1,200), and boots
($1,365) by Moncler
Grenoble. Right: Coat
($2,120), shirt ($350),
tie ($220), and trousers
($435) by Corneliani.
WHETHER YOU
OPT FOR
A CLASSIC
BLAZER,
TOASTY PUFFER,
OR OLD-SCHOOL
TOPCOAT,
THERE’S NO SHORTAGE OF
WAYS TO
SEEK COVER.
ANNOUNCE
YOURSELF WITH A
TWEEDY
CHECK, OR
GET A FEEL FOR
PLUSH
MOLESKIN.
A LITTLE TEXTURE
ALWAYS
DOES THE TRICK.
128
This page:
Jacket, sweater,
and trousers by
Tod’s; skateboard
($2,975) by
Hermès.
Opposite:
Coat ($10,890),
suit ($12,095), shirt
($695), and tie
($350) by Kiton;
loafers ($670) by
Fratelli Rossetti.
13 0
This page:
Coat ($1,998),
sweater ($298),
trousers ($228),
and boots ($298)
by Michael Kors.
Opposite:
Sweater ($990)
by CALVIN KLEIN
205W39NYC.
ALL-AMERICAN
STAPLES
LIKE GRAPHIC
KNITS
AND SHEARLING
COATS
SHOULD ALWAYS STAY IN
HEAVY
ROTATION.
For store information see page 155. Prop styling by Chelsea Maruskin. Grooming by Lisa-Raquel at See Management for R+Co.
For eons, the earth has had
the same amount of water—no more, no less.
What the ancient Romans used
for crops and Nefertiti drank?
It’s the same stuff we bathe with.
Yet with more than seven billion people on the planet,
experts now worry we’re RUNNING OUT
OF USABLE WATER.
The symptoms are here . . .
13 2
. . . multiyear droughts, large-scale crop
failures, a major city—Cape Town—on the
verge of going dry, increasing outbreaks of
violence, fears of FULL-SCALE
WATER WARS. The big question:
How do we keep the H20 flowing?
By Alec Wilkinson
Illustration by
Sean Freeman
Having evaporated from lakes and rivers and oceans and returned as snow and rain,
has been through innumerable uses. DINOSAURS DRANK IT. The Caesars
It’s been places, and CONSORTED WITH THINGS, that you might not care to
the wildly expanding citizenry required new Hubbert predicted that U. S. oil production
I. All the Water state and federally managed water systems would reach maximum output between 1965
There Is run by Watercrats.
Paper water is also a signiier of a domestic
and 1975, and in 1970 it did, but it has risen
lately because of new means of recovering oil,
HERE’S A CONCEPT: paper water. Paper wa- and global concern called peak water, a term such as fracking. Some people still believe in
ter is water the government grants certain proposed in 2010 by the hydrologist Peter peak oil, and others think there will always
farmers who are drawing water from a river Gleick in a paper he wrote with Meena Pala- be plenty of oil, because there is more we ha-
or a watershed in, say, California. The phrase niappan that was published in Proceedings of ven’t found yet.
describes the water the farmer, under pre- the National Academy of Sciences. Gleick meant That water was in a position similar to oil
mium conditions, is entitled to. Practically, the phrase to be applied to worldwide circum- occurred to Gleick when people would ask if
however, paper water is mostly notional wa- stances, such as those that currently prevail in he thought that the world, with its popula-
ter, conceptual water, wish water, since over Cape Town, South Africa, where, as a result of tion growing alarmingly and climate change
the years California has awarded many times a ferocious three-year drought, the taps might causing certain places to become disastrously
as much paper water as there is actual wa- before long run dry, possibly in 2019—Day water-soaked (South Asia, Texas) while others
ter—which, to distinguish it, is quasi-legally Zero, it’s been called. The U.S. is also afflicted. (Cape Town, California) are water-starved,
called wet water. Some paper water might be In fact, Gleick regards California, with its would ever use up its water. “My irst reac-
made real during years of exceptional abun- relentless, outsized, and wildly conlicting tion was ‘We never run out of water,’ ” Gleick
dance, but most of it will forever be specula- demands on water, as a “laboratory for all of says. “But there’s groundwater in China and
tive and essentially useless, since it can’t re- peak water’s concerns.” India and the Middle East and in America in
alistically be traded, having no value. Paper Peak water derives conceptually from peak the Midwest and California that we really are
water thus amounts to a type of hypothetical oil, a phrase irst used by a geophysicist named using up just like oil.”
currency, backed by the Bank of Nowhere, M. King Hubbert in 1956. Peak oil means Water cannot be created or destroyed; it
Representing Nothing since 1960 (or there- that the planet has only so much oil, and that can only be damaged. When Gleick says we’ll
abouts), when modern water troubles arrived eventually it will grow suiciently scarce that never run out, he means that at some point,
in America and especially in California, where what remains will be too expensive to collect. millions of years ago, there was all the water
13 4 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _ E sq u ire
the water we consume the aquifer has dropped several hundreds of
feet in the last forty years, and in places the II. Haves and
did, too. city is sinking four inches every year. As for
Have-nots
the world’s stock, however, nearly all of the
think about. water on earth is salty; less than 3 percent is STATIONARITY, A TERM from statistics, ap-
fresh. Some of that is in rivers, lakes, aqui- plies to contexts in which the past predicts
fers, and reservoirs—the Great Lakes con- the future. When water experts say that we
tain one ifth of the freshwater on the earth’s are “outside stationarity,” they mean that the
surface—and we have stored so much wa- slaphappy way that the world uses water has
ter behind dams that we have subtly afected brought about so many unexampled circum-
the earth’s rotation; but two thirds of all the stances, so many overburdened systems and
freshwater we have is frozen in the earth’s areas of deprivation and depletion, that we
cold places as ice or permafrost, leaving less cannot know how matters will unfold. Some-
than 1 percent of the world’s total water for times water specialists say that the earth is
all living things. Much of that gets a rough experiencing water stress. The Nile, the Rio
ride. American ponds and streams and lakes Grande, the Yellow River in China, the Indus
and rivers contain fungicides, defoliants, sol- in Asia, and the Colorado (which sustains the
vents, insecticides, herbicides, preservatives, American Southwest from Phoenix to Las
biological toxins, manufacturing compounds, Vegas to San Diego) are tapped out. The Ganges
blood thinners, heart medications, perfumes, lows, but it’s unspeakably ilthy.
skin lotions, antidepressants, antipsychotics, With water, there are “distinct classes of
antibiotics, beta blockers, anticonvulsants, water haves and have-nots,” according to Jay
germs, oils, viruses, hormones, and several Famiglietti, who is the senior water scientist
heavy metals. Not all of these are cleansed at the NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory at the
from water before we drink it. California Institute of Technology. (Earth sci-
There are two kinds of numbers, I believe, ence is part of NASA’s charter.) “The wet ar-
big ones and little ones, but here are some eas of the world are the high latitudes and the
big ones by way of context: According to the tropics, and the areas in between are getting
World Health Organization, among the two drier,” he says. The supercharged hurricanes
billion people who have no drinking water and typhoons that have resulted from global
provided to them, 844 million travel more warming move water around within the re-
than thirty minutes to a river or a tap, where gions that already have water but do nothing
they sometimes receive water contaminated for the parched places.
by human excrement. Such water has the risk America has hot spots, too. California had
of diarrhea, cholera, dysentery, typhoid, and its own Zero Day not long ago when, in Tulare
polio. Nearly 850,000 people die each year County in the Central Valley, an area of cor-
from diarrhea, a cruel circumstance in areas porate farms, something like a thousand wells
short on clean water, since diarrhea works went dry in towns such as East Porterville,
THIRSTY? its efects by means of dehydration. Bangla- meaning that more than seven thousand
he Colorado River Delta, in Northern Mexico, desh, India, Rwanda, and Ghana have some people found themselves occupying houses
photographed in 2010. Most years, of the most tainted water. where you would turn on a tap and nothing
nearly all the river’s water is diverted long before The simplest hardships to invoke are hun- came out. The water table has been diverted
it reaches the delta.
ger and thirst. Only a few hours of depriva- by means of deep wells and irrigation sys-
tion will acquaint a person with both. Half a tems serving the sprawling farms. The county
there is, a result of the law of the conservation gallon of drinking water a day is what each began delivering bottled drinking water,
of matter. Having evaporated from lakes and of us needs to drink to stay alive. (An Ameri- and there were free public showers. Water
rivers and oceans and returned as snow and can uses roughly eighty to a hundred gallons to lush toilets and do laundry came from
rain, the water we consume has been through a day, including toilets, baths and showers, tanks parked at the ire station. People illed
innumerable uses. Dinosaurs drank it. The dishwashers, washing machines, and so on.) barrels and hauled them home.
Caesars did, too. It’s been places, and con- In the dry parts of the world, or the semidry A quarter of all the food grown in America
sorted with things, that you might not care to parts where there are too many people and comes from the Central Valley—oranges
think about. In theory, there’s enough fresh- no water-delivery system, the search for that and grapes are raised in Tulare, along with
water in the world for everyone, but like oil or daily half gallon can be dire, and sometimes dairy cows and cattle—so having it go even
diamonds or any other valuable resource, it past dire. A survey in 2015 of members of partially dry is not a small concern. “No one
is not dispersed democratically. Brazil, Can- the World Economic Forum in Davos listed really knows what happens, if this were to get
ada, Colombia, Peru, Indonesia, and Russia “water crises” for the irst time as the world’s worse,” Famiglietti says. “Our water security,
have an abundance—about 40 percent of leading threat, ahead of “spread of infectious and therefore our food security, is at far greater
all there is. America has a decent amount. diseases” and “weapons of mass destruction.” risk than people realize. Aside from the cri-
India and China, meanwhile, have a third of Each year Gleick’s organization, the Paciic sis of humans not having water, we’re also go-
the world’s people and less than a tenth of Institute, updates its Water Conlict Chronol- ing to be losing these major food-producing
its freshwater. It is predicted that in twelve ogy, a compilation of disturbances around the regions like the Central Valley. Agriculture
years the demand for water in India will be world involving water. In 2017, there were will migrate to where the water is, maybe the
twice the amount on hand. Beijing draws wa- more than seventy incidents, dozens of them southern parts of South Dakota and south-
ter from an aquifer beneath the city. From deadly, mainly in the Middle East and Africa. ern Idaho. There is already some agricultural
being used faster than rain can replenish it, In 1997, there were only three. migration to those regions.”
S eptember 2018_Esquire 1 35
That may sound simple, relatively, a cul- known aquifers in the world, it runs from South Toward the end of 2011, someone anony-
tural shift, like the past migration of workers Dakota to Texas, more or less in the shape of a mously mailed him a private document from
and jobs from the Rust Belt to the Sun Belt. monkey wrench. Near the top, in places, it is the Heartland Institute, a conservative think
However, climate change, with its disrup- a thousand feet deep, and at the lower end, in tank that denies climate change. The docu-
tion of the rain cycle, making severe storms places, there are areas where it is as shallow as ment described a plan to produce a curricu-
even more severe and diminishing the snow only a few feet. The Dust Bowl, which played lum for kindergarten through twelfth-grade
pack in seasons of drought, makes it impos- out above the Ogallala, was, in a way, a peri- students that disputed climate change. It
sible to know which areas will remain stably od phenomenon. All the water necessary to also described the institute’s contributions
wet. Cape Town is sufering now because “a sustain the crops that now cover the plains to climate scientists who cast doubt on cli-
once-in-a-millennium event,” as it has been was always there, but a few feet deeper than mate science.
described, has been occurring since 2015— Depression-era farmers could reach with “I could have thrown it out. I could have
scant rain in the region for three years. windmill pumps. Electric pumps, which only sent it to a journalist,” Gleick told me. “But
In California, rain became scarce in 2011 became widespread by the end of the thirties, I chose to try to verify it myself.” He set up
and stayed scarce for ive years. Suicient rain made it accessible. a Gmail account under the name of one of
fell during the winter of 2016 that the drought For decades farmers thought the Ogallala Heartland’s board members and asked Heart-
appeared to have ended, since people could see was inexhaustible. According to Scientific land to send him the institution’s most recent
rivers running and reservoirs illed that had American, drawing on government studies, documents. What he received he dispersed to
seemed nearly empty before. Water experts by 1975 the amount of water taken each year journalists, who published them. The Heart-
view the matter diferently. They make a dis- from the aquifer equaled the low of the Colo- land Institute said that one of the documents
tinction between surface drought and ground- rado River, and now the annual draw is about was forged. Gleick wrote a piece in the Huf-
water drought. Five years of overdrafting in eighteen times that amount. Farmers have ington Post acknowledging what he’d done
the Central Valley left a groundwater deicit been pumping out four to six feet a year in and apologizing for his deception.
that the rains didn’t replenish. places where half an inch is being added. As “My board was not happy,” he said. “I
Aquifers commonly contain water that went far as continuing to be useful, the Ogallala stepped down, they made an investigation
underground thousands or millions of years might be exhausted by 2070. A reasonable that eventually supported my version, and I
ago and hasn’t come out since—it’s called fos- estimate is that it would take six thousand was reinstated.” Meanwhile, the Heartland
sil water. Groundwater, however, is as vulnera- years for rain to replenish it. Institute bought petergleick.com, where you
ble to contamination as surface water. An over- can read “Why Isn’t Paciic Institute’s Peter
drafted aquifer near a coast can have seawater
seep into it and ruin it. Arsenic occurs naturally IV. A Water-Crisis Gleick in Jail?” Regardless, in 2016, Gleick
stepped down after nearly thirty years as the
in rocks and can ind its way into the water ta-
ble, also ruining it. An aquifer near an industrial
Tour Paciic Institute’s president and now spends
most of his time writing in an oice on the in-
dump might be polluted by man-made chemi- PETER GLEICK IS sixty-one, and he looks like stitute’s premises. He is considered to be an
cals. In the Central Valley, some wells are con- the scholar he is. He is tall and gangly, with a eminent authority on water issues around the
taminated by nitrates, which come from fertil- thin face and glasses, a gray beard, and wispy world and is regarded as especially knowl-
izer, leaky septic tanks, and big cattle-feeding gray hairs that rise from his crown like solar edgeable about California’s circumstances.
operations; drinking nitrate-polluted wa- lares. He grew up in New York City, where he The Paciic Institute occupies a Victorian
ter can bring about conditions such as blue- was a Cub Scout and learned from his father to house among an enclave of such houses in
baby syndrome, in which the ingertips of identify birds in Central Park. He went to Yale, Oakland. One morning I met Gleick there,
babies turn blue from insuicient oxygen. then he moved to California and got a doctorate and then we drove east to visit what he called
Finally, an overdrafted aquifer can be de- in energy studies from UC Berkeley. In 1987, some “peak water signifiers”—a sort of
pleted. Whether it returns is a matter of how he was one of four founders of the Paciic In- water-crisis tour.
it was illed in the irst place. Porous aquifers, stitute, which specializes in water policy, and We were going to a walnut farm irst. On the
ones beneath sand and gravel, as in the Central in 2003, he was named a MacArthur Fellow. way, as we passed rolling green hills, Gleick
Valley, can recover with rain. Aquifers that explained that there are three components
lie beneath rock deposits or in gaps between to peak water, the irst being peak renewable
them, and especially ones in places where water. “A renewable resource is low limited,”
ZERO DAY
rain is sparse, might not recover in a time A dam near Cape Town in March with he said. “You never run out of it, like sunlight.
frame that means anything against the mea- almost nothing to dam.
sure of a human life span. In India, so many
farmers have killed themselves from despair
over disappeared groundwater, and the pov-
erty it enforces, that there is a category called
suicide farmers. In 2016, more than 11,300
farmers took their own lives.
13 6 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _E sq u ire
Most water is renewable—rainfall, snowmelt,
rivers—but in more and more places around
the world, we’re running into limits brought
HaLF Creek, which he draws from. Since the creek
was running high, he was looding some of his
ields with creek water to restore the water ta-
on by peak use. The classic example is the
Colorado River, hardly a drop of which ever
EMPtY?A water-crisis primer
ble. Finally, McNamara showed us hedgerows
he’d planted to attract insects and birds and
reaches its delta, in Mexico, anymore. It gets a huge machine by a barn that was convert-
used up entirely along the way.” ing walnut shells into organic matter he could
Even an overtaxed river like the Colorado
is partly renewable. “You get more the next
year when it rains and snows,” Gleick con-
40
PERCENT
use for fertilizer. Bookkeeping is what goes
on in most farm oices I’ve ever visited, but
McNamara’s was like a command center
tinued. “It’s not that there’s never water, but Projected share of the world’s where he could ind on a computer screen
there’s a limit to how much you can take, and population—more than three what he needed to know about which square
that limit, its peak, is the renewable low of billion people—living in areas of yard of his orchard needed water and which
severe water stress by 2050.
the resource.” square yard had enough.
Gleick calls the second component of peak As Gleick and I drove away, he said that
water peak nonrenewable water. “Just like
peak oil,” he said. “An aquifer is not sustain-
able if humans pump it faster than nature
450
PERCENT
McNamara was noteworthy in trying to do
more with less water. “The hedgerows and
recycling shells, those are things that most
charges it. The people in the Central Valley Increase in number of violent farmers think cost money and don’t provide
who have seen their wells go dry are experi- incidents spurred by conflicts over an immediate or obvious return. They’re
encing peak nonrenewable water. There is water between 1997 and 2017. smart from a sustainability point of view, but
(In 2018, water violence has occurred
still water there, but the groundwater level if you’re maximizing return, you don’t do
in Ukraine, Syria, Mali, and Iran.)
has dropped, and only the farms can aford them. That’s why his neighbor’s using pesti-
to dig the deeper well. You could ind other cides. It’s more expensive to put in smart ir-
water for these people—you could hook them
up to a municipal system that’s maybe hooked
up to a river. No one’s dying of thirst. But
700
MILLION
rigation systems and soil-moisture monitors,
but you make up the money by being organic.”
S eptember 2018_Esquire 1 37
would be too embarrassed to ask for the
pill), business execs (who thought it would
make Pfizer a laughingstock), and legis-
lators (who lobbied against the pill for the
same reason as the church).
It was the job of two unlikely guys at
Pfizer to overcome them all: Rooney
Nelson, a young Jamaican marketing whiz,
and Sal “Dr. Sal” Giorgianni, a crusty Ital-
ian pharmacist from Queens who became
Viagra’s medical expert. Together, Nelson
and Dr. Sal became the dynamic duo of
erectile dysfunction, wooing angry reli-
gious leaders, skittish politicians, and
cynical pharma nerds from all over.
Against all odds, they succeeded, making
Viagra one of the most successful and emu-
lated launches of all time, and the basis
ccording to the Chi- for today’s $3 billion erectile-dysfunction
nese calendar, 2017 industry. Now, on the drug’s twentieth
was the Year of the birthday, they’re sharing their story for the
Cock. 2018 is the irst time.
Year of the Dog.
And, in Dog years, hen Rooney Nelson arrived for his
this is also the Year of the Cock Pill: Viagra. irst day of work at Pizer’s corpo- But Osterloh was among those who
The revolutionary erectile-dysfunction rate office in New York City after thought it merited more study. He can still
drug is celebrating the twentieth anniver- completing his MBA at Florida A&M, he remember his feeling of helplessness as a
sary of its Brobdingnagian launch in a most thought it was anything but cool. Com- junior doctor at the UK National Health
auspicious way: by inally going generic. pared with Jamaica, where he was born and Service when a forty-year-old man asked if
The ramifications for generic sildena- raised, it seemed like an “exceedingly con- he could be treated for impotence. Osterloh
fil (the scientific name) are huge for your servative” company, illed with thousands had gone to his boss to inquire, only to be
pocketbook and your health. Viagra’s high of somber employees, many of whom told there was nothing they could do.
demand and cost (about seventy dollars wouldn’t leave their desks without irst put- Pizer agreed to what he calls a “low pri-
a pill) have made it among the most boot- ting on a suit coat. “It was not a hip kind of ority” pilot study for twelve men to see if
legged meds in the world, and one of the place,” he says with a laugh. these uprisings were just an anomaly. But
top sellers for Internet pharmacies. A study Pizer had been around since 1849 and when the subjects also experienced erec-
presented at the World Meeting on Sexual had made its name as the chief producer of tions, Osterloh and the others realized that
Medicine found that 77 percent of Viagra penicillin during World War II. In recent they had more than a cure for chest pains on
sold online was fake. Counterfeit Viagra years, however, it had fallen behind larger their hands. They seemed to have stumbled
and similar impostors have been linked to pharmas such as Merck and Johnson & on a pill that could give guys erections.
liver damage, strokes, and death. Just a few Johnson. It was looking for a break. It came, David Brinkley, the head of Pfizer’s
years back, former Los Angeles Lakers star as breaks often do, when least expected. new product-planning group, was enticed
Lamar Odom ended up face-planted in a Scientists at Pizer’s lab in the small coastal enough by the discovery to see if it had the
Nevada brothel from coke and phony herbal town of Sandwich, England, had made a potential to go to market. Gay and progres-
fucklements. “He was taking herbal Viagra,” strange discovery while testing a drug that sive with a flair for marketing, Brinkley,
brothel owner Dennis Hof said at the time, treated chest pain by expanding blood ves- like Nelson, felt he was an outlier within
“and a lot of it.” The availability of generic sels. When given the drug three times a the staid company. And it didn’t take long
sildenail cuts the price of the pills in half day, volunteers were reporting muscle after he began discussing the drug in-house
and promises greater assurance that the pill aches, headaches, and some discomfort to ind that many didn’t share his opinion.
you pop won’t be your last. while swallowing. Oh, and, as one investi- “To have conversations about sexual-func-
But while Viagra is poised to go wider gator relayed to Ian Osterloh, the clinical tion drugs was diicult for a lot of people,”
than ever before, the inside story of its researcher heading the study for Pizer in Brinkley says. “It was not considered digni-
launch is not widely known. How did a 1991, some were getting hard-ons, too. ied medicine.” The management told him
group of oddball underdogs in America’s Treating erectile dysfunction had long that it was not in the business of marketing
most conservative pharmaceutical conglom- been considered an exotic hack involving side efects—erections or otherwise.
erate, Pizer, bring it into existence? At the penile injections and pumps. While Oster- But after enough volunteers reported
time, the idea of selling Viagra was consid- loh was intrigued by the report of increased getting erections from the drug, there was
ered crazy at best and immoral at worst. erections among the chest-pain-medication no doubt about it anymore: This was no
In fact, it’s a miracle that it ever came to volunteers, it didn’t muster much of a reac- side efect; this was a direct result. In 1996,
be at all. In addition to the people within tion. Impotence wasn’t acknowledged as a Pizer gave Brinkley the green light to bring
Pfizer who were in an uproar over the clinical problem, he says, and if so, it was this pill to the public. It was named Viagra,
“dick pill,” four major groups began rally- thought to be psychological, not something a meaningless word chosen, if anything,
ing against it before its launch: the Catholic that could be ixed with a pill. “Nobody at because drugs that started with the letter V
church (which thought it was immoral), that time really thought, Gosh, this is fan- were considered powerful-sounding.
medical experts (who insisted patients tastic,” he recalls. Viagra would only work, Brinkley knew,
140 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _ E sq u ire
The men had volunteered to be part of
one of Viagra’s early clinical trials, a first
step toward bringing it to market. It was
a double-blind, placebo-controlled, ran-
domized trial, which meant neither the
physician nor the patient knew who’d be
getting a placebo. After taking the drug,
the patient received what was called “visual
sexual stimulation.” The VSS of choice:
Debbie Does Dallas. “I’d like you to watch
it,” Nelson would tell the patient, “and I
want to see if you get an erection or not. If
you get an erection, there’s no cameras or
anything, just so you know. If you have an
Left: The very first Viagra print ad. It appeared erection, you know, feel free to masturbate.
in Esquire in August 1998. Above: Bob Dole’s
erectile-dysfunction-awareness campaign.
Here’s a vial. When you’re done, could you
put the ejaculate, the semen, in that vial,
close it up, and come back out?”
endorse and, ultimately, prescribe Viagra. To determine what, if any, impact Viagra
It would be his job to convince them. had on ejaculation, the team had to mea-
Dr. Sal was the ideal complement to sure the amount and consistency of the
Nelson. A wry middle-aged clinical phar- semen. It was still so new that they had
macist with five kids and two degrees no idea what might happen. “You don’t
from Columbia, he was Pfizer’s director know what this drug is doing,” Nelson says.
if he could overcome the biggest—and for of external relations, the medical expert What it was doing was something they’d
Pizer, the riskiest—challenge of all: being responsible for managing the company’s never anticipated. Some patients reported
taken seriously. It wasn’t just the outside image and reputation—two things that that they were having blue-tinted vision,
world that presented a problem; it was the Viagra, more than any other drug he’d a condition known as cyanopsia. It turned
viability within the company itself. When encountered in his eighteen years there, out that one of the enzymes restricted by
Nelson irst heard from Brinkley about the put at risk. “Pizer then was still a very, very Viagra in order to create an erection caused
“dick pill,” as they called it, he had the same conservative company with very conserva- sensitivity in some rod cells in the eye,
reaction as just about everyone else there: tive roots,” he says, “and we were about to causing some subjects to temporarily pick
He cracked up. “The early conversation,” go of and sell a drug that was for sex.” With up more strands of blue light. A more last-
he recalls, “was laughter.” Dr. Sal’s medical expertise and Nelson’s ing symptom presented in the volunteers
If Viagra was going to become anything marketing lair, it would be up to the two of who reported not just erections but four-
but a punch line, Brinkley needed a launch them to sell the sex drug to the world. hour ones—a temporary side effect that
team with the right mix of brash and many patients didn’t mind. “Most people
style to handle it. And Pizer had just the hat the hell is this? I don’t know thought it was kind of cool,” Nelson says.
odd couple for the job: Rooney Nelson what it’s doing to my brain.” The With the trials showing positive results,
and Dr. Sal. “Have you ever seen that feedback from the men in the early they had to ind the right allies to get behind
Arnold Schwarzenegger movie Twins?” Viagra focus groups went along these lines. Viagra. In pharmaceutical marketing, just
Nelson says with a laugh. “We were “They were horrified,” as Nelson puts it. like in any other culture or industry, there
Twins. He’s sort of a short, chubby, Ital- “The irst reactions were ‘You’re kidding, are the whales, the big shots whose vote
ian, gregarious guy, and I’m this kind of right?’ You know: ‘Where’s the camera? of confidence is essential to a new prod-
tall, black, not-that-friendly guy that’s all I’m on Candid Camera.’ ” uct’s success. The group consisted of the
about business.” The volunteers in the clinical trials were high-powered, high-priced medical practi-
Nelson, an up-and-coming marketer at also skeptical. Nelson and Dr. Sal sat eagerly tioners: the heart surgeons, neurosurgeons,
Pizer, not only had the right edge to launch in a urologist’s oice one day as ten patients and the like. At this time, the 1990s, pharma
Viagra; he also had the perfect connections. anxiously iled in. But the goal wasn’t just to companies had their own kind of legiti-
He’d spent the past couple years working make money. There was something deeper mized payola—spending millions to wine
on Cardura, a treatment for the symptoms that both of them recognized. Impotence was and dine doctors into endorsing their meds.
of enlarged prostates, and had cultivated a real problem, one that, by being overlooked, To sell an erection drug, however, meant
relationships with urologists around the was condemning generations, including the swaying the doctors who were way lower
country, the exact group they needed to legions of baby boomers, to lives of frustration. down the pecking order: the urologists.
Compared with brain surgeons and cardiol-
ogists, urologists were the Dunder Mifflin of
the pharma world: nerdy, unsexy, and unac-
customed to the warm fuzz of marketing
crews. But that was about to change.
The mid-nineties were the heyday for
pharmaceutical junkets, but Viagra marked
the irst time that unglamorous urologists
were the ones being seduced. Pizer would
fly a dozen of them to an all-expenses-
paid weekend at the (c ont i nu e d on p a ge 1 50)
S eptember 2018_Esquire 1 41
HEnRY S
GoE
tO...
Suit (
$4,99
irt ($5 This page
5), sh
95), a :
nd tie
($235
Jacke ) by R
t ($1,7 Oppo alph L
s auren
hirt ($ ite:
90), s .
and ti 5
e ($14 50), trous
0) by e
Fendi rs ($690),
.
S .
S I A MPLE
N
H A S I
C A
Z
R I D IN
Y BAN A TV H O ST
D I N G ,
N C A
R ’S HUS WAS
Y G O L
HE
ST ARS
BL A
I
K E L
Y
IVE
FOR
L
E
E
TH I S?H
HEG
N R O R
ACT PULL S O FF
YS B E I N S T
E PLA O R .
O DUC UCKIE ND HE
H
FAV E R . INT
R
T H EL
W N . A
ER. RDE
N
S S
DRE POSSI SELT
B LY O NO
OT H
W MA
I R E THE
AH
A
U ITE T IN IT L ING BY MI K AT
AN D Q
YO
F S U STYL
ISTO R
R A Y EAL
Y
H AG G R
T HE BEA
U
I N HS
B Y
AP
OGR
P HOT
1 43
W
Oxford-educated heir of one of Singa- actor in this year’s biggest rom-com.
o
pore’s wealthiest families. Pure luck? Maybe. But then you learn
H
Enter Lisa from accounting. She had about his Jedi-mind-trick-like optimism.
met this guy Henry Golding five years “Hi, I’m Henry. I’m a television host” is
ago when he hosted travel shows for how he would introduce himself when
the BBC and the Discovery channel, he was twenty-one, having left behind
and she was struck by his charisma, his job as a hairdresser in London to
his British accent, and . . . well, look at make it in Kuala Lumpur. The catch?
him. Chu follows him on Instagram. He wasn’t a TV host. But the fake-
are stars made in Hollywood? Some- Golding screen-grabs the notification. it-till-you-make-it attitude worked.
times it starts with Lisa in accounting. Asks his manager what it means when “Sometimes it’s just that mental switch
Director Jon Chu was on deadline to a Hollywood director randomly follows in yourself that changes and opens
cast the part of Nick Young, the male you. “They’re casting for Crazy Rich doors that you would never imagine,”
lead of his film Crazy Rich Asians (out Asians!” he’s told. He starts read- says Golding, now thirty-one.
now), based on the best-selling novel ing the book. But before he’s able to Although it’s unusual for a first-
by Kevin Kwan. But despite going so far finish, Chu gets in touch. “I’ve got two time actor to nab such a huge role,
as to invite anyone to submit a video questions for you: Can you act, and it’s rarer still for the part to have such
audition on social media, Chu hadn’t will you read for me?” One audition social significance: Crazy Rich Asians
found the perfect Nick—the magnetic, later and Golding is a newly minted is the first American film with an all-
Asian cast since The Joy Luck Club,
based on another novel about the Asian
diaspora, was in theaters more than
twenty-five years ago. The potential
for this movie to bring Asians to the
forefront in Hollywood in the wake of
recent whitewashing scandals like
Tilda Swinton’s casting as a Tibetan
monk in Doctor Strange is not lost on
Golding, or the rest of the close-knit
cast. “Everybody was from a differ-
ent part of the world: the UK, Australia,
America, we had Singaporeans, Malay-
sians, and they’d all been through trials
and tribulations of being Asians in non-
Asian countries, of always having this
turmoil of ‘Do I belong here?’ We knew
that this film would be putting every-
body on the path of normalizing leading
roles with Asian faces attached to
them,” he says.
“Jimmy O. Yang [Bernard Tai in
Crazy Rich Asians and Jian Yang on
Silicon Valley] really highlighted
the fact that he never spent time—real
time—with other Asians in entertain-
ment. He was just like, ‘This is why
we’re not united enough. This is some-
thing we should be striving for—just
supporting each other.’ We haven’t
gotten to a stage where we can help
push each other onto the platforms
that we need to be pushed onto to get
the word out to the rest of the world.”
While he wants to continue telling
Asian narratives—he recently wrapped
the film Monsoon, about a man who
returns to Vietnam to spread his par-
ents’ ashes—he and his team are
focused on leading Hollywood roles.
He’ll costar alongside Blake Lively and
Anna Kendrick in Paul Feig’s A Simple
Favor (out September 15), a fun, twist-
filled suburban whodunit. “I’ve become
like Paul’s nephew,” he jokes. But
Golding’s dream job? “Anything that
Denis Villeneuve is attached to, like
Dune. I would love to be in a Bond
movie. I would love to be in Star Wars.
I’m ready to work hard.” Plus, he’ll
have no trouble introducing himself.
—Kevin Sintumuang
Suit (
$2,
by Ca 350), turtl This p
age
nali; O en
rigina eck sweat :
l Sixti e
es wa r ($450),
tch ($ a
7,500 nd belt ($7
) by G 0
Suit (
$4,74 O lashü 0)
5), sw pposite: tte.
and ti
e ($2 eater ($1,2
95) b
y Bru 25), shirt (
nello $
Cucin 495),
elli.
AM .
N TA G R
MEA
NS N
WHE
I NS
T IT O U O
RW H A
W S Y
A N AGE
O L L O OLD
.
A SKS
H I
ND
S M
O M L Y F
A S I A N
!” HES’ S T
GOLD
IN G
R A
R I C H
D IREC
TO R JOHN
CHU
N G FOR
C RAZY
Y WOOD CAST
I
L ’RE
HOL Y
“THE
S eptember 2018_Esquire 1 45
45)
: s h irt ($7
age ), an d
This p er ($1,090 e.
we a t utur
1 0,9 50), s Zegna Co
suit ($ egildo
e e -piece by Ermen olce &
T h r
o si te: 7 4 5 ) by D
Opp ($
hoes ake Men.
and s y
ey i
6 7 5 ), M
5 ), s hirt ($ 60) by Iss
$2,59 ana; tie ($2
Suit (
Gabb
IT’S RA
RE FOR
AN AC
TOR’S
FIRST
CRAZY ROLE T
O HAV
RICH A E SUC
WITH
AN ALL-ASIA SIANS
IS THE
FIRST
H SOC
IAL SIG
N CAST IN MO
AMER
ICAN F
ILM
NIFICA
NCE:
RE TH
AN TW
ENTY-
FIVE Y
EARS.
S eptember 2018_Esquire 1 47
LD B
E
G RO L E S
O U
A D I N
G L E .”
W
F ILM
T H AT T
H I S
A L I Z I N THEM
NORM
W
KNE
“ W E
E D TO
ATH
O F
T A C H
E P A T
DY O
O
N TH
FA CES
ERYB A N
ING
E V
ASI
PUTT WITH
Jacket
($2,57 This
t ($410 page:
5), shir
), and t
tie ($2
25) by rousers ($1,15
Tom Fo 0) by L
rd. anvin;
Suit ($ Op
and shir posite:
2,295)
t ($625
) by Em
porio A
rmani.
Fo r s t o
re infor
mation
see pag
e 155. C
asting b
y Emily
Produc Poenisc
tion by h. Groo
Tedi Ts
uruda f ming by KC Fe
or Tsur
uda Stu e at the Wall G
dio. r o u p fo
rK evin Mu
rphy.
ALL RISE couldn’t even say the word penis.” They moment,” Nelson says. “The less we talk
(c on ti nu ed from page 141) needed to come up with something better about this, even internally, the better we are.”
than impotence. Viagra’s medical team came Discreetly, the team reined this strategy
in thousands of focus groups. They narrowed
it down to three possible ways—or “product
profiles”—to present Viagra to the world.
The first option was the most direct: It’s a
drug that can cause erections and enable
men who have lost their ability to have sex.
his is blasphemy! This is immoral!” The second was more scientiic: Viagra can
Nelson and Dr. Sal listened treat a disease called erectile dysfunction and
patiently inside a conference room allow men to return to normal physiological
capacity. The third took a diferent approach
completely, skirting the details of the drug
and focusing instead on its delivery system:
Breakers in Palm Beach, Florida, and give released. They’d assembled a roundtable of For the first time, there’s a pill that can be
them $2,500 each for their time. Pizer could deacons, pastors, rabbis, and others to gauge used to treat a condition that has always been
easily spend $200,000 per trip to entice their reactions to the boner pill. It was part of treated by invasive surgeries.
them. “Urologists, they had never really been their due diligence for this uncharted terri- After thousands of focus groups, they
to places like that; they had never eaten like tory, an important litmus test for what kind of arrived at the answer: option number three.
that; they had never drank like that,” Nelson resistance they’d meet by releasing the drug. Viagra is a pill—safe, cheap, and easy. A guy
says. “So you had a really primed group that “There was concern that there might be would merely get a sample, pop it into his
was receptive to hearing your message.” religious objection,” says Brinkley, who’d mouth, and see how it worked. This was the
Over dirty martinis and lollipop lamb had feelers out all the way up to the Vati- perfect way to get men to look at the drug.
chops, Nelson would look out into the room can for a response. At this roundtable, it was As Nelson puts it, “I’ll try it! And if it doesn’t
and wonder how he was going to energize already going south. “Why would you even work, who gives a fuck?”
them. He pitched them on how he was going do this?” one clergyman asked in dismay. The strategy succeeded. In the later focus
to make them as cool and desirable as open- “If that type of product ever comes on the groups, the pill hit big. By February 1998,
heart surgeons. “This is an opportunity for market, I will organize protests against it.” Pfizer was ready to launch the drug. But
you to be at the cutting edge of what could It seemed like a very real possibility that there was one important hurdle remaining:
be the most revolutionary product in a long the launch could trigger a kind of “sex approval by the Food and Drug Administra-
time in medicine,” he said. But there was one panic,” Brinkley says, from the moral major- tion. Pfizer had spent nearly $100 million
problem, they quickly told him: They never ity. “They don’t want insurance or tax dollars on Viagra up to that point, and there was no
talked about sex with their patients. There paying for people’s boners.” It seemed they guarantee that the world’s irst erection pill
was no reason to discuss impotence, because were also prepared to sensationalize Viagra, wouldn’t go limp.
they had no remedy. “No physician asks alleging that it would give men erections and
about things that they can’t treat,” as Nelson also drive them to sex-crazed sprees that n March 27, 1998, Nelson, Dr. Sal,
puts it. “It was a wall of silence.” would spread AIDS. “As a gay man,” Brin- Brinkley, and the dozen others on
The only way to succeed was to break the kley says, “there was a fair amount of eye Viagra’s core team gathered around
wall. He and the team developed what Dr. Sal rolling that went on behind closed doors.” a fax machine in a conference room in Piz-
called a series of “doorknob conversations,” They were also getting flak from inside. er’s New York headquarters. They were
named after that moment when men, often As word spread throughout Pizer, Nelson awaiting a message from the FDA regarding
on the way out of the doctor’s oice, would and Dr. Sal began hearing more and more whether their eighteen months of eforts had
inally ind the courage to ask about a cure jokes and derisive comments from cowork- finally paid off. Shortly before noon, the
for impotence. Their solution: Be straight ers they passed in the halls. “We’re going answer spooled out. A lawyer ran her eyes
with them. “Why don’t we just make this to be a laughingstock,” one person would over the page and read it aloud: “The FDA
real simple and say, ‘If they think they have say. “Are we going to have Playboy Bunnies has approved sildenail citrate for the use of
it, give them the medicine, tell them how in the lobby?” joked another. Others were erectile dysfunction in men.”
to take it, set realistic expectations, and let more pointed. “Are you guys crazy?” they’d Nelson shouted, “Oh my God! Fuck me!
them go for it,’ ” Dr. Sal says the conversa- ask. In Nelson’s estimation, the cards were Yeah!” He fell on the loor in relief, joined
tion went. “And it’s either going to work or stacking against them. “Fifty percent of the by the others. But they couldn’t celebrate
it’s not going to work.” people within the company that knew what for long. The FDA approval meant it was
But while Dr. Sal and Nelson were making was going on thought it would never launch time to launch a drug that still had yet to be
headway with urologists, they were encoun- and never should launch,” he says. announced to the world.
tering mounting skepticism within Pfizer. Normally, when launching a new drug, a Right on the heels of the approval,
“Some medical groups felt that maybe we company would take pains to methodically there was a more pressing matter: the side
shouldn’t be marketing such trivial medicine,” introduce it to the world in advance, prep- effects required to be listed on the label.
Dr. Sal says. “But as the old joke goes, it’s only ping the market, doing press, and so on. The regulatory board had hit them with a
trivial if you don’t have the problem.” But Viagra was too volatile to leave vulner- black-box warning about taking Viagra with
Part of the issue, they realized, was seman- able to these elements. So the team made a nitrates—a combination that could result
tics. No guy wanted to tell his doctor he was counterintuitive—if not seemingly hare- in a heart attack. Most companies would
impotent. The word had too many negative brained—decision: They would launch try to bury the black box as much as possi-
overtones: weakness, helplessness, steril- completely in stealth, going public with it ble. But Brinkley surprised his team. He told
ity. “In the early days,” says Brinkley, “just only twenty-four hours later if and when it the group to lead with it. “We’re going to
talking about impotence was taboo. You was approved. “I had an epiphany, a eureka encourage people that if you’re on a nitrate,
150 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _E sq u ire
THAT WATCH
WON’T PAY
FOR ITSELF.
Switch to GEICO and save money for the things you love.
Maybe it’s the vintage submariner you’ve always wanted. Or those designer aviators. They’re what
you love – and they don’t come cheap. So switch to GEICO, because you could save 15% or more
on car insurance. And that would help make the things you love that much easier to get.
152 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _E sq u ire
Private Tom and Public Hardy. Except, that is, has smoothed but not erased the boys’ mis- celebrity powers?” Albert asks me. “Not the
when it comes to his children. “I will pose for chief and the mom’s sass. Hardy jokes to Mae, irst time I’ve witnessed that.” He laughs, then
you, and photos of me and my wife are ine,” he “All right, lovely, want salt-and-vinegar chips quiets. “But it’s a nice tool to have.”
says. “But if someone takes a photo of my kids, with a side of infectious disease? Pick up a lit- Hardy returns without explanation. A few
all bets are of. I will take the camera of you and tle souvenir?” She smirks. minutes later, the nurse comes in. “She’s go-
beat the fucking shit out of you.” His voice con- Hardy squeezes some sanitizer onto his ing to be seen next.”
tains no hint of exaggeration. “That’s the one hands and rubs it, then reaches for a chip. Like that, Mae is at the top of the list.
that hurts. My kids didn’t ask for what my job “Don’t do that,” Mae says. “Wipe of your Though Hardy is coy about how much
is.” He pauses. “There’s something that really hands irst. It’s not for eating.” he played the fame card, it’s clear his job
upsets me about the imposition of a grown-up “It’s better than eating disease,” Albert here is done. As we say goodbye, Mae pulls
world on a child.” weighs in. “I’d rather be sanitized to death.” him in close. “I want you to know that I
When we spoke earlier about his relationship “I’m gonna take my chances,” Hardy says. have plans to see Venom,” she says. “You’ve
with Chips, he said he was working to become “How’s your mum and dad?” she asks. done something that’s close to my heart. You
a better father by learning from the mistakes “Very good, actually,” he says. “It was my know I’m a sci-i freak.”
of his own. “In trying to protect my children, mum’s birthday last week.” “You’re gonna enjoy this one,” Hardy says.
I’ll probably give them their own dose of prob- “Twenty-one again?” “This one’s just for you. And for my boy.”
lems,” he told me. “But I don’t want them to “I’m glad to see you’re cracking jokes,” Hardy wants to exert control over his world.
go through what I went through.” Albert says. The brutal irony is that the more successful
“Me too,” Mae says. he becomes, the more the world controls him.
AT Kingston Hospital, we make our way When she leaves the room with the help of But as we walk out of the hospital, I suggest
to Mae’s room. She’s feeling better, but a nurse, Hardy turns to Albert and delivers a that while his celebrity might feel like a bur-
dried blood still cakes her face. She and dose of optimism: “She’s walking, mate. That’s den, in the instance of Mae and Albert it was...
Albert don’t know who or what to expect next, a good sign. The next thing we’re going to get He inishes my sentence: “Perfect.”
or how long it will be. Hardy asks what she re- is an X-ray, or maybe a CT scan if they’re con- At the exit, an orderly chases us down. “Tom!
members—“Hit the pavement,” she says. cerned about bleeding or swelling in the brain. Tom Hardy!” We stop. “I just love your mov-
“Made a nice sound”—and what still hurts. We They’ve got to check all the boxes.” ies. Can I take a picture?” Two more fans fol-
unload snacks we brought, and then we wait. Once Mae is back, Hardy steps out to talk to low. He smiles as they gather around in the hos-
The three relax into a familiar rhythm. Age the nurse without saying why. “Is he using his pital parking lot and start snapping selies.
LIGHTING THE BONFIRE THE PEACOCK PATRIARCHY ulation of a Lauer comeback, if not at NBC,
(co ntinued from page 121) (co n t in u ed f r o m p age 10 9) then somewhere else, possibly a cable-news
channel. But that is unlikely, at least for
now. “Could he come back in three years?”
Auletta asks. “Maybe. America’s a surpris-
ingly forgiving country and loves comeback
stories.”
Lauer remains secluded at the beach. He
has been negotiating with his soon-to-be ex-
wife’s divorce lawyers and attempting to of-
load properties—his Sag Harbor home has
been listed for $12.75 million, and his Upper
East Side pad sold for a reported $7 million
in April. (He was also spotted driving a Land
Rover with a “For Sale” sign in the window.)
in Arthur C. Clarke’s Childhood’s End. dramatic—we are home to the number-one Lauer has broken his silence on only three
Homo novus? As Noyce saw it, these so-called drama on television. A show that each week occasions, each time conceding that he’d
radical youth movements were shot through gives us twists and turns, heartbreaking re- erred but simultaneously downplaying his
with a yearning for a preindustrial Arcadia. veals, and this season the departure of a misdeeds. “I fully acknowledge that I act-
They wanted, or thought they wanted, to return once-beloved character. I’m talking, of ed inappropriately as a husband, father,
to the earth and live on organic vegetables and course, of ‘This is the Today show.’ ” and principal at NBC,” he said in a state-
play folk songs from the sixteenth and seven- After being rehired by NBC News to re- ment in April, before adding that “any alle-
teenth centuries. They were antitechnology.... claim some of its luster, Lack has achieved gations or reports of coercive, aggressive, or
They were the reactionaries of the new age. something close to the opposite. He has abusive actions on my part, at any time, are
They were an avant-garde to the rear. They presided over one public-relations disaster absolutely false.” After NBC released the results
wanted to call of the future. They were still- after another while ABC News has continued of its review in May, he put out another state-
born, ossiied, prematurely senile. to nip at the heels of both Today and Nightly ment, saying, “There are aspects of the NBC
If you wanted to talk about the creators of News, frequently overtaking them in the rat- report with which I clearly disagree.”
the future—well, here they were! Here in the ings. Whether Lack and his team, including Every now and again, he gets snapped by the
Silicon Valley! Just before Apollo 8 circled the Oppenheim, can persuade Comcast CEO paparazzi, carrying pizza to his car or sitting
moon, Bob Noyce turned forty-one. . . . And he Brian Roberts to give them more time to set astride a brand-new Harley-Davidson. In those
was one of the oldest CEOs in the semiconduc- things right remains one of the most closely pictures, he looks much like the old Matt Lauer
tor business! He was the Edison of the bunch! watched decisions in the industry. we all used to know so well. Or rather the Matt
He was the father of the Silicon Valley! The tabloids periodically fizz with spec- Lauer we didn’t.
S eptember 2018_Esquire 1 53
DRIP...DRIP...DRIP as well as migratory stopovers for birds. “Taking Soft path involves conservation and tactics
(c on ti nu ed from page 13 7) water from the San Joaquin Delta,” Gleick said, such as storm-water capture or wastewater
“there’s longstanding, serious, peak-ecological- treatment and reuse—twenty-irst-century
water concerns about salmon extinctions in the thinking, Gleick calls it. “We are already treat-
delta, other ish extinctions, and also how it acts ing wastewater, stuf you lush down your
on the Paciic lyway,” a major migratory route toilet,” Gleick said. “We are not yet drink-
for birds that goes over the region. ing that water, because we don’t need to.
From a slight movement of color in the ield, They drink it in parts of Africa and in Singa-
he identiied a meadowlark landing on a fence pore, where they call it ‘new water,’ a means
post, like one of those people who need only of branding it. We use it for nonpotable pur-
a few notes to name a song. “There is a ield poses: irrigation, cooling power plants, and
of study in ecology called ecological valua- restoring groundwater.”
tion,” he continued. “What’s the value of an Gleick turned into the parking lot of the
endangered ish species, or worse, extinction? pumping station, where there were only a cou-
The fact that we’re bad at valuing those things ple of cars. “I’m a big fan of California agricul-
doesn’t mean that there’s no value to them. ture,” he said, “but I’m also a big fan of ecosys-
underneath his neighbor by drilling a deeper Peak water should never mean that people are tems and reliable urban water supply. I think
well, since groundwater doesn’t observe dying of thirst. If we get to that point, that’s a we can have a healthy agricultural economy
boundaries. So many treaties and arrange- failure of governments. Instead, peak water’s and meet basic human needs for water and
ments and agreements govern water use in going to be felt irst by ecosystems and agri- still save the ish, but not the way we’re do-
the West and have for so long that a court culture and economies. We’re already seeing ing things today.”
in 1861 wrote that the “secret, occult, and peak-water constraints hurt our economies, “What if things don’t work?” I asked.
concealed” nature of the resource made it especially with the drought, in farmers having “The dystopian vision, which I don’t think
impossible to control. Impossible then, ap- to fallow land, which leads to unemployment. will happen, because I hope and think we’ll
parently impossible now, with voracious use “I think people in California have under- be smarter than that,” Gleick said, “but the
in between. stood for a long time that our water system dystopian future is one in which we lose more
is not in balance,” Gleick went on, “but they and more isheries, the winter-run Chinook
VI. The Upside see the problem through their own lenses. If
you’re a farmer and you see salmon or the delta
salmon go extinct, the delta smelt disappear,
bird migrations plummet, the Salton Sea”—a
BY A SIGN AT the entrance to the Harvey O. smelt as responsible for water being used in a saline lake fed by Colorado irrigation run-
Banks Delta Pumping Plant, outside Tracy, way that doesn’t beneit you, you think you can off—“disappears, and toxic dust spreads
Gleick pulled over and opened a map. Out the do without the ish. If you care about the ish, over southern California, the way it did when
window was a broad expanse of brown cattails you may think the farmer could grow some- the city of Los Angeles drained Owens Lake.
and a long reach of deep blue water with the thing diferent, or the same thing diferently, Plus a number of farms go out of production,
sun shining on it and gleaming like a strip of and use less water. Neither group talks to the and considering how reliant the country and
chrome. “We’re here,” Gleick said, pointing other, but it’s a false dichotomy to think that the world are on California farms, the efect
on the map to an extensive line of blue run- the only way to solve the human water prob- is widespread. Also, urban water gets more
ning mostly east to west. “The mouth of the lem is to give up water for ish.” and more expensive, because we have to turn
San Joaquin River, where the Sacramento and Gleick believes there are two solutions— to desalinization, consequently more popula-
San Joaquin join. It’s the largest delta on the the hard path and the soft path, notions tions lack access to safe and afordable water,
West Coast.” also derived from energy policy. The hard path and we see more and more East Portervilles.
Above the marsh, a red-tailed hawk slid wrings water from the environment mainly by “What makes me optimistic,” he went on, “is
across the sky like a skateboarder. “The third means of dams and tunnels for transferring that it’s obvious we can do things diferently.
concept of peak water is peak ecological wa- water and by desalinization plants. It’s what I would be doing something else if I didn’t have
ter,” Gleick went on. “Peak renewable and peak World Bank guys and engineers are trained that optimism, although it’s tempered in two
nonrenewable efectively describe the prob- to do, Gleick said. The hard path exempliies ways. One is, while I truly believe we’re mov-
lems with supply and demand. A third prob- twentieth-century thinking, which in turn was ing toward sustainable water management and
lem, though, are the ecological damages that based on the nineteenth-century notions that use, I think bad things will happen along the
result from human use of water. Say we take resources were boundless and that science way. We’ll lose some things permanently, like
more and more water from a river. We grow could control nature. There are still places to species. The other thing is that not everybody
more food, we make more widgets, we get an put dams, but dams are very expensive, and will sufer equally. The rich can isolate them-
economic beneit, but the ecological cost also desalinization is too costly to be practical any- selves to some degree from climate change
grows as isheries sufer and wetlands dry up. where except places such as the Persian Gulf, and water problems, but the poor will sufer.
Eventually, the negative ecological costs out- where oil pays for it. Those weren’t rich communities in the Cen-
weigh the economic beneits. We deine that as Hard path believes that no water should es- tral Valley that had their wells dry up.”
the point of peak ecological water.” cape being used, and it is indiferent to the vi- For several minutes, we stood beside the aq-
Gleick pulled the car back onto the road and tality of an ecosystem. By its reasoning, a de- ueduct and simply watched the water lowing
turned onto a blacktop leading to the pump- pleted system can be shed for a new one, the south, the way people stare at a deep hole in the
ing station, which we could see like a fort half- way new oil deposits can be found. The dis- ground. Then Gleick said, “When you start
way up some hills, about a quarter mile ahead. carded system will expire or recover, but the butting up against peak-water limits, you have
Through pipelines and canals, the station sends caravan will have moved on. An example is to start doing things diferently. We’re not go-
water south from the delta as far as Los Angeles, the Colorado River, the passage of which is ing to build many more big dams, and we’re
which gets the bulk of its water from the north. so oversubscribed that only once in the last overdrafting groundwater, but that will drive
The deltas and estuaries it draws from tend to twenty years has the river reached its delta innovation. This is the direction we have to go.
be breeding and nursery areas for birds and ish in Mexico with any low. There’s no more new water.”
154 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _ E sq u ire
unlikely tend to point out how diicult it is to ISIS took over dams on the Tigris and Eu-
VII. The Downside move water, but it isn’t any more diicult to phrates and released water on downstream
EARLIER, Gleick had said, “In California, we move water than it is to move oil. villages to prevent attacks on their bases.”
have all the world’s water problems in one form Gleick thinks that water is less likely to “Water Wars” makes a ine headline, Gleick
or another. There’s one exception. We don’t re- cause a war than to be used as a weapon. In said, but he thinks any such conlict between
ally have violence, yet.” Elsewhere, they have 2014, in the journal Weather, Climate, and nations would be more complicated. “India
their share. In 2016 in Darfur, seventy people Society, he published a paper called “Water, and Pakistan have been ighting forever over
were killed “in clashes between farmers and Drought, Climate Change, and Conlict in water in the region of Kashmir,” he said, “but
herders over access to water resources and Syria.” He described the area’s water con- if it breaks into war, water would only be a part
land,” according to the Paciic Institute’s Wa- licts, which are ancient—the irst, accord- of the cause. Egypt has threatened Ethiopia
ter Conlict Chronology. ing to the Water Conlict Chronology, ap- over the Grand Ethiopian Renaissance Dam
In recent years, many of the conlicts in pears to have occurred forty-ive hundred Ethiopia is building over the Nile at the border
which people have been killed over water have years ago when a king named Urlama diverted of Ethiopia and Sudan. Egypt is completely
taken place in India. Some of the occasions in- water through canals to deprive an enemy dependent on the Nile, but would they ac-
volved protests over dams or canals, and some of it. More recently, climate change and tually attack the dam? I don’t think so, but
were farmer-versus-herder disputes. In 2014, the scarcity of freshwater resulting from a it’s possible.”
in northern India, during a drought, a group of drought between 2006 and 2011 led to what The future is rarely a continuation of the
bandits announced that they would kill peo- one expert described as the “most severe present, and doesn’t usually play out as we ex-
ple who lived in villages near their hideout set of crop failures since agricultural civili- pect. Maybe we don’t run out of water. Maybe
unless the people brought them water every zations began in the Fertile Crescent many science inds a better means of providing drink-
day. Twenty-eight villages said they would take millennia ago.” Gleick’s paper discussed able water from castof water and sewage. We
turns paying what they called a “water tax.” how all this encouraged the discontent that tend to think of societal calamities as happen-
Indirectly, water afects civil migration, led to Syria’s civil war. “No one argues that ing in places where the people are diferent
which in turn afects politics in the form of climate change or drought caused the civil from us, yet matters of race and culture seem
responses to migration, such as the rise in Eu- war,” he told me. “But they had an inluence. irrelevant when we all require a half gallon of
rope of right-wing nationalism and the elec- And after the civil war started, there were water each day to survive. When a region runs
tion in Italy in March of populist factions op- massive and unrelenting attacks by pretty out of water, the people left there don’t really
posed to immigrants. Last year, speaking at much all the parties on civilians and infra- die of thirst. They die mainly from the diseases
the Vatican’s Pontiical Academy of Sciences, structure, including, explicitly, water re- that come from drinking bad water. In these
Pope Francis wondered “if we are not on the sources. Attacks on the water-treatment places, the equation is succinct: Demand, sim-
path towards a great world war over water.” plants in Aleppo, attacks in Iraq on local ple human need, the assertion, even, of a right,
People who think a water-conquest war is water systems—use of water as a weapon. overwhelms supply.
CREDITS Armani suit and shirt, armani.com. P. 149: Lanvin jacket, shirt, and trou-
sers, 212-812-2866. Tom Ford tie, tomford.com.
ty Images for Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences; p. 108: Zinone:
Nathan Congleton/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank; Fili-Krushel andTurness: Heidi/NBC/
STORE INFORMATION Photographs & Illustrations NBCU Photo Bank; Roque: Desiree Navarro/WireImage. Lighting the Bonfire,
For the items featured in Esquire, please consult the website or call the This Way In, p. 30: Leather: iStock; Top Gun: Ronald Grant Archive/Alamy Stock p. 119: Bettmann Archive/CORBIS; p. 121: Wolfe in office: Jack Robinson/Hulton
phone number provided. Photo; The Matrix: AF Archive/Alamy Stock Photo; Eastwood: Amanda Edwards. Archive; magazines (2), assignment card: Richard Majchrzak/Studio D. Drip,
The Code, p. 57: Acne Studios sweater, acnestudios.com. Gucci trousers, Editor’s Letter, p. 36: Wolfe: Bob Adelman. The Big Bite, p. 39: Bart, Ho- p. 134: Colorado River Delta: Ronald de Hommel; p. 136: Cape Town dam:
gucci.com. P. 58: Banana Republic suit, bananarepublic.com. Marni sweater, mer, Lisa, Maggie, and Marge Simpson: FOX ©2006 FOX BROADCASTING WIKUS DE WET/AFP. All Rise, pp. 138–139: Rooster, Viagra pill: Getty Images.
marni.com. Double Eleven T-shirt, doubleeleven.co. Drake’s jacket, drakes THE SIMPSONS. THE SIMPSONS™ and ©2006TCFFC ALL RIGHTS RE-
.com. Gucci sweater, gucci.com. Brooks Brothers shirt, brooksbrothers.com. SERVED; Duffman: Duffman on THE SIMPSONS on FOX. THE SIMPSONS™ (ISSN 0194-9535) is published monthly (except com-
A.P.C. jeans, usonline.apc.fr. P. 60: John Varvatos silver necklace, silver cuff and ©2004TCFFC ALL RIGHTS RESERVED; Jimbo, Kent Brockman, Kodos, bined issues in December/January and June/July/August and when future
bracelet, jasper necklace, turquoise bracelet, lapis bracelet, brass brace- Ralph, Apu, Mayor Quimby, Milhouse, Moe Szyslak: FOX THE SIMPSONS. THE combined issues are published that count as two issues as indicated on the is-
let, and ring, johnvarvatos.com. RW Guild wood bowl and KH Würtz bowl, SIMPSONS on FOX. THE SIMPSONS™ and ©2002TTCFFC ALL RIGHTS RE- sue’s cover), 9 times a year, by Hearst Communications, Inc., 300 West 57th
rwguild.com. P. 61: Vacheron Constantin watch, vacheron-constantin.com. SERVED; Mr. Burns, Ned, Barney, Chief Clancy Wiggum, Grampa: FOX THE St., NY, NY 10019 USA. Steven R. Swartz, President and Chief Executive Officer;
P. 62: Prada jacket, vest, shirt, and portfolio, prada.com. Polo Ralph Lau- SIMPSONS. THE SIMPSONS on FOX. THE SIMPSONS™ and ©1996TCFFC William R. Hearst III, Chairman; Frank A. Bennack, Jr., Executive Vice-Chair-
ren jeans, ralphlauren.com. Armando Cabral loafers, shop.armando-cabral ALL RIGHTS RESERVED; Chief Clancy Wiggum: Chief Clancy Wiggum on THE man; Catherine A. Bostron, Secretary. Hearst Magazines Division: David Car-
.com. P. 66: Tod’s shoes, tods.com. A.P.C. jeans, usonline.apc.fr. The Elder SIMPSONS on FOX. ™©1999FOX BROADCASTING CR. FOX ™©1996THE ey, President; John A. Rohan, Jr., Senior Vice-President, Finance. © 2018 by
Statesman socks, elder-statesman.com. Clarks Originals shoes, clarksusa SIMPSONS and TTCFFC ALL RIGHTS RESERVED; Groening: Fox Broadcast- Hearst Communications, Inc. All rights reserved. Esquire, Man at His Best,
.com. Saint Laurent by Anthony Vaccarello shoes, ysl.com. P. 69: Burberry ing/FXX; Futurama characters: AF Archive/Alamy Stock Photo; p. 40: Disen- Dubious Achievement Awards, The Sound and the Fury, and are regis-
bag, burberry.com. P. 72: Herno vest, 212-226-1432. Nautica jacket, chantment: 2018 The ULULU Company. DISENCHANTMENT™ & The ULU- tered trademarks of Hearst Communications, Inc. Periodicals postage paid at
nautica.com. Brooks Brothers jacket, brooksbrothers.com. LU Company. All Rights Reserved; p. 42: Getty Images (24); p. 50: Getty Images N.Y., N.Y., and additional entry post offices. Canada Post International Publi-
Face Mask, p. 122: Versace trench coat, jacket, shirt, and tie, 212-317- (11); book cover: Courtesy Penguin Random House; p. 52: Getty Images; cations mail product (Canadian distribution) sales agreement no. 40012499.
0224. P. 123: Louis Vuitton coat, jacket, sweater, and trousers, louisvuitton p. 54: Alfa Romeo Stelvio Quadrifoglios: 2018 Alfa Romeo Stelvio Quadrifoglio Editorial and Advertising Offices: 300 West 57th St., NY, NY 10019-3797. Send
.com. Fratelli Rossetti shoes, fratellirossetti.com. P. 124: Prada jacket, shirt, in Rosso Competizione at Circuit of the Americas in Austin, Texas; jet: Courtesy returns (Canada) to Bleuchip International, P.O. Box 25542, London, Ontar-
and tie, prada.com. P. 125: Bottega Veneta jacket, sweater, and trousers, Four Seasons; bike: Courtesy Trek; Urus: Courtesy of Automobili Lamborghini io N6C 6B2. Subscription prices: United States and possessions, $7.97 a
800-845-6790. Borsalino hat, borsalino.com. P. 126: Moncler Grenoble America, LLC. The Code, p. 57: Grooming by Mia Santiago for See Manage- year; Canada and all other countries, $19.97 a year. Subscription services:
jacket, turtleneck sweater, ski pants, and boots, moncler.com. Corneliani ment; p. 58: J.D. Rattar/Shetland Museum and Archives; p. 62: Bonobos (3): Esquire will, upon receipt of a complete subscription order, undertake fulfill-
coat, shirt, tie, and trousers, corneliani.com. P. 127: Etro jacket, turtleneck Christian Hogstedt; p. 64: Elgort: Polo Ralph Lauren; mixer: Courtesy Pioneer ment of that order so as to provide the first copy for delivery by the Postal Ser-
sweater, trousers, and boots, etro.com. Salvatore Ferragamo jacket, tur- DJ; cologne: Richard Majchrzak/Studio D; jacket: Courtesy Canada Goose; LV vice or alternate carrier within four to six weeks. From time to time, we make
tleneck sweater, shirt, trousers, and shoes, 866-337-7242. P. 128: Kiton sneakers: Courtesy designer; p. 66: Shoes (3): Richard Majchrzak/Studio D; our subscriber list available to companies that sell goods and services by mail
coat, suit, shirt, and tie, kiton.it. Fratelli Rossetti loafers, fratellirossetti.com. Cavaliere (3): Courtesy subject; p. 69: Bag: Philip Friedman/Studio D; model that we believe would interest our readers. If you would rather not receive such
P. 129: Tod’s jacket, sweater, and trousers, tods.com. Hermès skateboard, cutouts (4): Richard Majchrzak/Studio D; runway (4): Courtesy designers; mailings via postal mail, please send your current mailing label or an exact co-
hermes.com. P. 130: CALVIN KLEIN 205W39NYC sweater, calvinklein.com. p. 72: Jackets (3): Richard Majchrzak/Studio D; Weller: Erica Echenberg/Red- py to Mail Preference Service, P.O. Box 6000, Harlan, IA 51593. You can also
P. 131: Michael Kors coat, sweater, trousers, and boots, michaelkors.com. ferns; runway (2): Getty Images. Unconventional Wisdom, p. 81: Nunez: Jared visit preferences.hearstmags.com to manage your preferences and opt out of
Henry Goes to Hollywood, p. 142: Ralph Lauren suit, shirt, and tie, Siskin/Patrick McMullan; Eggleston: Jemal Countess/WireImage; Glück: Robin receiving marketing offers by e-mail. For customer service, changes of ad-
ralphlauren.com. P. 143: Fendi jacket, shirt, trousers, and tie, fendi.com. Marchant; Amis: Express; Blank: Ray Mickshaw/WireImage; Seidel: AP Photo/ dress, and subscription orders, log on to service.mag.com or write to Cus-
P. 144: Brunello Cucinelli suit, sweater, shirt, and tie, brunellocucinelli.com. Richard Drew; Liebling: David Scherman/The LIFE Picture Collection; Hamilton: tomer Service Department, Esquire, P. O. Box 6000, Harlan, IA 51593.
P. 145: Canali suit, turtleneck sweater, and belt, canali.com. Glashütte watch, Zach Hilty/BFA/Shutterstock; Timms: Edd Westmacott/Photoshot. Cherry, Esquire is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts or art. None will be re-
glashutte-original.com. P. 146: Ermenegildo Zegna Couture three-piece suit, p. 88: Walker: Courtesy author. The PeacockPatriarchy, pp. 104–105:Halperin: turned unless accompanied by return postage and envelope. Canada BN NBR
sweater, and shirt, zegna.com. P. 147: Dolce & Gabbana suit, shirt, and Frederick M. Brown; Lack: Dimitrios Kambouris; Brokaw: Mike Coppola; Lauer: 10231 0943 RT. Postmaster: Please send address changes to Esquire, P.O.
shoes, dolcegabbana.it. Issey Miyake Men tie, 212-226-0100. P. 148: Emporio Patrick McMullan; Bush: Karl Moor/GC Images; Oppenheim: Rob Kim/Get- Box 6000, Harlan, IA 51593. Printed in the USA.
S eptember 2018_Esquire 1 55
this Way Out
156 S e pt e m b e r 2 0 1 8 _ E sq u ire