HANDBOOK FOR PARENTS

The most popular sentence from Shakespear's Hamlet is „to be or not to be“. Many
parents ask themselves the question „to beat or not to beat “. A lot of children are beaten by
their parents. Parents think that is okay to beat them, because they were beaten by their
parents. They don't see why it is wrong, because they got used to that behaviour. They think if
they turned out right, they can't harm their own children. For that kind of parents, beating
children is the only way to discipline them. They don't see a purpose in grounding or talking.
The phrase „spare the rod, spoil child“ is a modern proverb which means that if we don't
discipline child in physical way, it will become a spoiled brat.
But, is it like that?
Dear parents, keep these things in mind:
1. Respecting your parents doesn't mean doing the same things like them
Times have changed. In old times violence was normal. People didn't think that children
have their own rights. They didn't think about consequences. Scientists proved that
violence has negative influence on mental development of children, so be aware of that.
2. Hitting children teaches them that force makes right
When beating them, parents teach their children that the only way for solving problems is
violence. They are bad role models. Later in life children will think that violence is
normal. If they find themselves in hard situations they will use force, because they don't
know anything else. If it keeps going that way, the circle of violence will never end.
3. Do not use children to get control over your own life
Parents should not misuse their authority. Modern life is not easy. People are under stress.
They work all the time. Then, they take that anger and stress home. They shout on
children even for the smallest mistakes. Sometimes beating makes them calm. Everything
that they can't tell their boss or coleague from work, they show on children.
4. Hitting your children may stop their behaviour now, but it changes your
relationship with them forever
When they grow up they will understand things. They will remember every hit and they
will never forgive you. They will be angry because you have never showed them that you
love them and you were never there when they needed you the most. They will not want to
see you or to have anything with you. You will lose contact with them and possibly with
your grandchildren. You will feel lonely and sorry because of your mistakes, but it will be
too late.
Your family will be lost forever!
5. There are better ways to discipline your child
What does it mean to discipline a child? It means to show that the way child behaves is not
good. Shouting and hitting will not help. If the child does things that it is not supposed to
do, parents should sit down and explain why that is wrong and what should be done. Parents
should show how to behave, be an example. Children have bad days, too. Parents should
not expect perfection of their children. They shouldn't make an image of their perfect child
and be disappointed if the child is not that. We all make mistakes in life and that is normal.
For children it is harder to understand that. Don't make them think that they are worthless.

So, next time when you think about beating, just stop for a minute and think if you are
really helping your child.