Bramsch KSKidnappers

Kid Safe: How To Protect Your Family From Molesters and Kidnappers
by Joan Bramsch AUTHORamp; Pam Coronado
JB Information Station
www.empoweredparent.com
Copyright ©2002 by Joan Bramsch and Pam

Coronado
First published in the United States of America,

August, 2002
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CONTENTS
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[Back to Table of Contents]
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Joan Bramsch, Biography
Mother of five, grandmother of seven, she is founder of the

web site www.EmpoweredParent.com and also produces The
Empowered Parenting eJournal, now in it's 6th consecutive
year of publication, for parents worldwide
Joan is a family person, educator, premium toy designer,
writer and a publisher in traditional print and now in
electronic books—E-Books. Her feature stories, interviews and
articles appear in major international magazines and
newspapers, both print and on the Internet. Six of her best-
selling adult novels—numbering over one million copies—have
been published in ten languages for worldwide distribution.
****
Mom Of 5 Earns Scholarship

At one time, Joan and her children were enrolled in five
different colleges and her beloved husband Bill supported
them all! While she continued to work outside the home, she
earned a full scholastic scholarship to complete
undergraduate work at Washington University College, St.
Louis, MO, with B.S. Degrees in English, Journalism and
Communications.
"I had to stay on the Dean's List to set a good example for
my children!"
Teacher
Extensive Research & Practical Applications form the basis
of Joan's newly revised and expanded 287-page book for
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parents of young children, "TEACH ME, I'M YOURS: Success

For Your Unique Child".
Her education in the field of perception and body
awareness was obtained through doctors at St. Louis
Children's Hospital; therapists at the Irene Johnson
Rehabilitation Hospital, and several years of teaching at
Forsyth School, all located in St. Louis, Missouri. In addition,
she has done extensive research and practical application of
experimental lesson plans on her own.
Perceptual Designer
Joan designs perception toys, composes perceptual/motor
exercises and songs, and writes "I Feel Wonderful" stories—all
for children. In January, 1999 she premiered an Internet
magazine for parents. The Empowered Parenting Ezine, a free
publication for parents, step parents, grandparents, educators
and even parents-to-be, serves readers in more than eighty
countries. Membership grows daily. Why? Because, when she
isn't writing, serving Parents is her Passion!
Intuitive
As a working member of the US Psi Squad, a national
group of men and women, predominantly working in or
retired from police and homicide departments or other law-
enforcement agencies, Joan and the other members use their
intuition to help any police department who requests
assistance, to find a lost or missing child, a downed plane, an
escaped killer. The group does this without fee, and only
works with law enforcement agencies with jurisdiction, never
individuals. www.uspsisquad.com/
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Understand this: Intuition/instinct is not a gift for only a

few. We all have this skill; therefore, Parents should
encourage their child and teen to use instinct to keep safe.
Meet Pam Coronado -
Creator of the "Smart Hearts" Program For Children

www.pamcoronado.com/
Pam Coronado is the mother of three school-aged children,

and is a licensed private investigator and intuitive who
specializes in missing persons. Pam is consulted by law
enforcement around the country in difficult missing persons
cases, especially those of children.
After working on several heartbreaking child abduction
cases, and collecting data on many more, Pam recognized
that many of these abduction scenarios could be prevented if
more children knew how to react to potential kidnappers and
trust their own instincts. Pam was working on developing just
such a safety program when a brave little girl named Sarah
managed to escape the grasp of a would-be kidnapper just
outside her daughter's own school. Sarah was given an award
in front of her classmates from Pam for "feeling scared but
acting brave" and Smart Hearts was born.
Pam has now taught thousands of children in California
public schools how to recognize child abductors and how to
protect themselves from them. Pam realized that in order to
fight child predators, she would have to learn all about them.
It is this deep understanding and knowledge that Pam brings
to KID SAFE.
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Introduction
The world in which our children are growing today is not

the same community in which former generations lived as
children.
Without fear, in Grandma and Grandpa's time, children
stayed outdoors after dark, playing Hide 'n Seek under the
street lights. They walked alone to the corner butcher to pick
up Mama's meat order for supper. They walked to the park
alone, waving hello to the neighbors sitting out on front
porches as they went, but at the playground there was always
a Parkie, a uniformed man who watched over them. They
were just vaguely aware that sometimes "bad men" tried to
grab little children. It didn't concern them much because they
had never seen a "bad man" nor had they known a child who
had been "taken."
In our childhood, we could still ride our bike to the grocery
store for bread, milk and bologna for lunches. We could walk
to the dime store on Saturday afternoon with a friend to
make a purchase, or to the ice cream shop for a 25-cent
malt. We could still walk alone to school; however, we soon
hooked up with friends along the way. One of the biggest
changes was that our folks walked along with us as we did
Trick or Treat on Halloween night—no way would our parents
turn us loose at night to run wildly from house to house,
gathering our loot as they had done in their generation. That
time was now over!
Somehow, the world had changed enough that our parents
were stepping in more and more to protect us and keep us
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from harm. Yes, the world wasn't as safe a place as it used to

be.
And yet ... bad things happened even in the Olden Days. I
remember Grandma telling about a Third Grade girl friend,
whose teenage sister disappeared and was never heard from
again. The grown-ups spoke about something called White
Slavery.
When I was a little girl, about age eight I think, a man
approached me on the street corner as I walked from my
school to a gymnastic program several blocks away and in the
opposite direction of my home. He didn't try to grab me, but
he certainly did engage me in conversation ... and I was naive
enough and intrigued enough to stand there and listen!
He asked if I knew where his girlfriend lived? Having no
warning about talking to strangers on street corners for no
reason, I readily replied that I didn't know because I didn't
live in this neighborhood!!!
His soft-spoken manner and quiet ways did not frighten
me. One part of me did begin to suggest that I should not be
standing here, that I needed to get to my tumbling class,
while another part of me continued to be very interested in
this man's dilemma—he couldn't find his girlfriend and
perhaps I could really help in some way. No one had taught
me that eight-year old little girls aren't much help to grown
men in finding their girlfriends. Especially grown men wearing
long top coats, just right for flashing!
The internal debate not withstanding, I began to feel a
quivery cautionary sensation in my chest, but again his words
overcame my reluctance to linger when he told me his
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girlfriend wore pink satin panties. He smiled at me fondly

then and touched my shoulder as he said, "I wonder what
color panties you wear, little girl?
That did it! Alarms bells went off in my head, my ears, my
chest, my tummy, and I did a sprint to the gym that would
have probably won first prize in an accredited race. But you
know what? I never did tell my parents. I thought they'd be
angry at me for talking to a stranger, like it was my fault he
said those things to me. I was more afraid of getting in
trouble at home, then perhaps saving another little girl who
didn't run away.
During the 60s and 70s—when most of you Mommies and
Daddies grew up—the cautions, the careful surveillance, the
watchfulness went up a notch or two again. Now there was an
overt introduction of "free love" (boy, what a misnomer, eh?),
the Pill and drugs. There were a lot of everyday adults who
were getting high on pot or harder drugs; this was an added
threat to you children. Especially a particular type of you
children—the vulnerable ones!
My daughter was one of those. She knew no strangers,
befriended the world, trusted everybody and truly went where
angels feared to tread. And it was on just such a trip, to the
corner apartment house where she was baby-sitting a family
of small children (without my knowledge or permission), that
she was attacked by a drug-crazed WOMAN! The mother. Her
husband saved my daughter from being more harmed than
having torn summer shorts. She ran home, terrified, of
course.
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They moved away the next week and I didn't report the
woman because I was more concerned with my daughter's
emotional trauma. In hindsight, I should have reported it, but
even then I didn't know the rules.
And how has life changed in the 21st Century? What are
you doing differently with your child than your parents did to
protect you?
+ Do you drive them everywhere—to games, lessons and
meetings?
+ Do you make sure at least one parent is outdoors by the
bus stop, waiting until the children are picked up?
+ Do you NEVER leave your child unattended inside your
vehicle? Not even for a second?
+ Have you trained your child to answer the phone by
simply saying, "Hello," and not "The Smith residence, Johnny
speaking?" I always thought that sounded so gracious and
proper; now, even with caller ID, we cannot reveal names to
strangers on the phone. Nor can we say our parents aren't at
home; rather, "My Mom is busy right now and she'd like me
to take a message."
So you Parents today have to be much more cautious than
your grandparents, much more careful than your own
parents. That's why I felt it was so important to help you
become empowered, to find the materials to make a
difference in the safety of your family.
This is not an easy book for entertainment, Parent. The
information contained in KID SAFE may save the life of your
child or teen.
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After you learn the lessons in this book, then teach them
(very easily, please, little by little) to your family, I hope you
will help me spread the word to as many parents as possible.
If you own a company or work for a company you feel would
welcome the opportunity to do a print run with the company
logo on the cover, I certainly would welcome the opportunity
to speak to any of them.
Here's my web site:
www.EmpoweredParent.com
Here's my e-mail address:
book@JoanBramsch.com
I also welcome feedback from you.
Tell me how KID SAFE has made a difference in the lives of
your family members.
Remember, Information banishes fear!
For your children, with love,
Joan Bramsch p.s. A friend made the following comment
and I share it with you because KID SAFE also covers Internet
safety:
"Your new book brings to mind when the FBI came
knocking on our door about 3 years ago. It seems our
daughter had chatted (AOL IM) with a guy on the Internet
one night and he had got her e-mail address. He eventually
met some teens and got arrested for rape after meeting them
out of state, which led to them (FBI) confiscating his
computer for evidence and they contacted all of the e-mail
addresses on his computer which included our daughter's.
She and my wife ended up having to go to DC to testify....
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Fortunately for us, nothing happened but it sure did open

her eyes to being careful in chat rooms and giving out any
information."
(Joan's note: Forewarned is forearmed!)
Understanding the Enemy
In order to protect children from predators, I realized that

I needed to understand them and know how they operated.
Not only did I study every child abduction scenario in the
country over the past ten years, I studied the predators
themselves. I went undercover to observe a large ring of
pedophiles and emerged with very disturbing insight.
Therefore, I must warn that this article will not be easy to
read and is meant for adults only. It's disturbing and chilling.
It is not meant to frighten you into locking up your children.
It's intended to wake you to the realities that you face in
today's world and the vigilance it takes to keep your children
safe.
INFANTS
There is generally only one type of person who abducts an
infant. Someone who wants a baby! Often this is someone
who has recently miscarried a baby and wants to pass the
infant off as her own. These women often befriend the mother
of a newborn to gain access to the baby. Beware anyone who
suddenly shows up in your life and wants to "help you" with
your new baby. These women come up with all sort of ploys
to get their hands on a baby. Fortunately, Mother Nature
gave mothers powerful intuition for protecting their babies.
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Please listen to yours when it involves the people you let into
your infant's world.
The other danger to infants and small toddlers is being
mistakenly kidnapped by a carjacker. That's why it's so
important never to leave your precious little one alone in a
vehicle. I know how difficult it is to wake a peacefully sleeping
baby to drag her or him into the quick mart or post office, but
the price for not doing so could be one you regret forever.
CHILDREN AND PRETEENS
This is the group I most often work with in teaching
"stranger awareness." I do so because this is the age that
sexual predators most prefer. The tactics and mind-set of
these sexual offenders are so complex, that I have broken
this explanation into several sections.
Getting to and from School
These days more and more mothers are working, leaving
kids to fend for themselves on the way to school in the
morning and getting home in the afternoon. I have given this
subject much attention because this is such a vulnerable time
for children. Kids on the way to school are more vulnerable
than children returning home from school. This is because
predators know that they can kidnap a child on the way to
school or the bus stop and no one will miss them right away.
Kidnappers count on the school not calling the parents to
inquire about a child who didn't show up that day, which
gives them several hours before anyone knows the child is
missing. Sexual predators value this extra time. Predators are
given that name because they enjoy the "hunt" and the
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excitement of trying not to get caught. The predators I

observed thought themselves to be quite clever.
Below are a few quotes taken directly from police reports
on sexual predators.
"Approached victim at bus stop and took her to his house
where he assaulted her."
"In the habit of scouting around the neighborhood looking
for young girls getting on or off the school bus. Would cruise
and drink beer while driving around looking for children."
"Offender and two accomplices, who were strangers to the
victims, lured them into a car, drove them to an apartment
where they were held at gunpoint, and assaulted physically."
"Victim was mentally impaired. Offender was the victim's
bus driver."
These people are very real and very frightening and
walking free. What can you do? Make sure your child does not
walk to school or the bus stop alone. If you cannot take them
to school or the bus yourself, make absolute sure they have
friends to walk with each and every day. If your child is the
first one to the bus stop wait with them until other kids
arrive. Your child's safety must come first.
Regarding bus drivers; in many states, bus drivers are not
given background checks. Bus drivers are usually not
employed by the school district, rather by the school bus
company and therefore are not required to have background
checks. If this is the policy in your child's school district,
check out the bus driver yourself. See my article on looking
for sex offenders in your area. Listen to your child if they
express any discomfort in taking the bus to school.
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Child molesters have an obsessive desire to be around

children. This is why they take positions as bus drivers, scout
leaders, clowns, coaches, etc. They want to be around
children and in most cases work to gain their trust over time.
Coaches, teachers and Scout Leaders
"While acting in the capacity of a teacher and/or
supervisor, the offender would engage in inappropriate
conduct with minors under his supervision."
"Offender was victim's teacher."
Most schools require background checks for all employees.
Make sure your child's school is one of them. As you can see
from the quote above ... at least two slipped through the
cracks. Don't take your child's safety for granted. Is the
schoolyard fenced so that strangers cannot enter the school
grounds? If not, get other parents to sign a petition to have
this done. I have seen several cases in which children were
abducted right from the playground.
I am also encouraging schools to teach self-defense
classes as part of the PE curriculum. All children should be
given the skills to protect themselves. Talk to your school
board about teaching self-defense to their students. The
proper program will not teach children to live in fear, but to
live in confidence and self-assurance.
Is your child a Girl Scout or Boy Scout? Check these people
out before you entrust them on a camp-out with your child.
Better still, volunteer to go along. Does your child ever say he
or she doesn't want to participate? LISTEN to them. What do
your gut instincts tell you about these people?
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I know it's difficult to mistrust people who seem so nice

and love children so much, but the world has changed and for
the sake of your child, you must remain vigilant. Molesters
often volunteer to become coaches. Make sure they have had
a background check and supervise practices when you can.
Molesters chose children who have the least parental
involvement.
Clowns
Why would I have an entire section on clowns? Many
children are afraid of clowns and amused parents push
children to interact with them despite their howls of protest.
This is a dangerous practice. If children are afraid, those
feelings should always be honored. If you don't honor their
feelings, how will they learn to?
I also must tell you that children do have reason to fear
clowns. I know one pedophile in particular who calls himself
"Bozo da Klown" (yes, I'm still watching you, Bozo). He does
children's parties. In fact, he's got a ring of friends around the
country.
Babysitters
"Offender was babysitting the victim when he assaulted
her."
"Accessed victims while babysitting."
"Offender babysat victims."
"Gained access to victim while babysitting."
Remember these quotes are from actual case files. What's
chilling is that I have at least 20 more just like them. What
you will find even more shocking is that these babysitters
were all men over the age of 55. I was stunned by this
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finding, myself. All I can ask is why were these men allowed
to baby-sit young girls and boys? Mind you, these men were
not relatives. Please use common sense when allowing people
to be alone with your child.
The Neighborhood
This is another surprising trend. In my informal data study,
the majority of children were abducted between the hours of
4:00 and 7:00 in the evening, right in front of their own
homes, or at least on their own street. Please refer to my
article on Smart Hearts for parents and children.
Lures
Please read my piece, Smart Hearts, a lesson for parents
and children, included in this book. Here are a few more
police quotes to think about.
"Offender took victims on a sailboat to an island where he
assaulted them."
"Lured with gifts and money. On one occasion, offered a
female child a dollar for a sexual act. Offender lured victim by
offering her money.
"Offender befriended adolescent boys with offers of jobs,
then had sexual contact with them."
"Bribed victims with money and toys."
"Stops boys on road, offers ride to buy food."
Boyfriends
"Gains access to juvenile victims through female adult
relationships."
If the man you are dating looks for reasons to spend time
alone with your child, pay close attention. A healthy male will
want to spend time together, as a family. A molester will want
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to get your child alone. A healthy male will realize the

inappropriateness of this. Annually a huge number of children
are victimized by their mother's boyfriends. This is a difficult
one to see or admit to if you really like or love the person
with whom you are involved. However, denial serves only one
purpose. It keeps your child in danger. Has your child's
behavior changed since this man came into your life? Does
your child shy away from this person? I have witnessed this
sad scenario countless times.
TEENS
"Offender and an accomplice invited victims to their home,
gave victims money, offered them drugs, threatened to kill
them if they failed to comply or told police.
Protecting teens is a challenge. They often become targets
because this is the age when parents loosen their grip a bit
and teens believe they are invincible. Predators know this.
As difficult as teens can get, it's imperative to keep
communication open with them. Let them know they can talk
to you and that you will listen without judging them. I have
had the heartbreaking burden of having to search for teens
that snuck out of their rooms at night and were never seen
alive again. I will soon be making a video specifically for
teens. Until then, please keep talking to your teens. If they
haven't had self-defense classes by this age do sign them up.
All teens should have tools to protect themselves.
Rules To Protect
Dear Empowered Parent,
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I sincerely hope you find this information helpful. It can

save your child's life. Certainly, do not try to teach all these
tools and tricks in one day. Take it slow and easy. Remember,
your child probably knows better than you, what a scary
world this is.
The right attitude—
"Here are some tools and rules to help keep you safe," will
go a long way to do just that. Information and education can
make the difference in any avenue of life, but especially for
Life, itself.
We are stewards over our children. Let us do a good job
and not stick our heads in the sand. There are bad people 'out
there' who will hurt you, or your child, if they can. I don't like
to think about it either, but unfortunately, it's true. These
instructions can keep your child safe.
Thank you. Let me know what you think of this piece.
Email me please.
empoweredparenting@earthlink.net
Yours, for the Children,
Joan
Empower Your Child Against Kidnapping And Molesters
These rules are very useful. Forward them to friends. The

information is excellent. The experts say to begin teaching
your children by age four years. Please go slow and easy and
they will not be frightened. They will be empowered.
OUTSIDE ON THE SIDEWALK OR PLAYGROUND
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1. Never get too close to a stranger. Molesters use all sorts

of tricks to get our "helpful" children near to them. Teach
your child to always stay on the inside edge of the sidewalk.
Example: Oftentimes the molester will stop for directions,
get them from the child, then drive around the block and
come back again, saying they forgot, will the child come
closer and explain again. This is an old trick and the child
often will come closer because NOW ... "he's not a stranger
anymore!"
2. Teach the children that it's okay NOT to be helpful to a
stranger. This will protect them.
KID SAFE is all about being smart enough to stay safe. A
Parent always hopes to keep safe his or her child and teen.
This book brings home more than hype and hope. KID SAFE
brings you practical solutions for real life situations.
Picture this: Your child is approached by a sad looking
man. He has a bright red leather leash in one hand and a
small photograph in the other. He leans toward the curious
child, holds out the picture and says: "I've lost my brand new
puppy. Taffy must have just wandered out of my yard." The
man looks so sad. Your child can feel his pain. "Do you think
you could help me look for him," asks the man, gazing fondly
at the puppy picture. "Maybe the two of us can find him. I
know he must be hungry and scared."
Does the child go off with the man?
Chances are your child will go with the man to help find
the lost puppy ... UNLESS you've prepared him or her to
always give the same answer to any stranger who asks for
help.
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"No, I'm just a little kid. Ask a grown up to help you."

And then run away like the wind.
3. If they are grabbed from behind, around the neck and
shoulders:
a. DROP DOWN
b. TWIST BODY
c. SCREAM—"You're not my father! (or mother)" or "Fire,
Fire, Fire!"
4. If they are grabbed by the wrist:
a. DO NOT pull away because that's where the adult has
strength and it won't work.
b. Instead, PULL DOWN AND TWIST TOWARD HIS THUMB
to break hold.
c. Practice this trick at home until it's second nature.
Experts suggest we buy our child a bracelet that says the
child's name on the front, and REWARD and your phone
number on the back.
a. The Child can then throw the bracelet out the car
window or leave it in a motel room for help.
To escape:
a. In a store—knock down things off shelves, run, fight,
scream.
b. Outside—run into the nearest house and ask for help
and 911 call.
c. Parking garage—run between cars, knock against cars
and pull on handles to set off the car alarms.
If locked in a car trunk:
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a. Teach your child how to KICK OUT CAR STOP LIGHTS

for air and to wave out hole. It isn't difficult to do, once s/he
knows how.
b. PULL OUT ANY WIRES they can get their hands on.
NOTE: If your child is kidnapped, tell the police "My child
knows how to kick out stop lights and tear out the wires of
back lights." Then the Police will have a much better chance
of finding your child fast because they will stop every car with
no lights.
If child is grabbed and pulled into a car:
a. The front doors may be locked but often, if the child
quickly TWISTS AND CLIMBS INTO BACK SEAT, they can get
the BACK DOOR OPEN and escape.
b. If car stops at a stop light, teach your child to JAM
HER/HIS FOOT ON TOP OF THE KIDNAPPER'S FOOT ON THE
ACCELERATOR AND RAM THE CAR IN FRONT.
c. Slide down onto front floor and reach up under the dash
and pull any wires they can get their hands on. Often this will
bring the car to a stop.
d. Jam down on the horn and SCREAM, SCREAM, SCREAM.
e. If grabbed by the coat, TWIST OUT OF IT. If then the
sweatshirt is grabbed, TWIST OUT OF THAT.
f. DO NOT BE QUIET OR SIT STILL, even if the molester
threatens to shot or stab her/him. That's not part of the
immediate agenda. BUT TEACH THEM TO FIGHT FOR THEIR
LIFE AT ONCE BECAUSE THEY WILL EVENTUALLY BE KILLED
otherwise.
If kidnapped and kept in a house or apartment near other
houses:
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a. Flash room lights in an S-O-S signal b. Clog the toilet

with a towel and keep flushing to flood the apartment below.
c. Try every window and door in the house. The child only
needs to find one opened escape route.
If held in an isolated area: teach your child to hide INSIDE
the house because the molester will think s/he has gone
outside to run away.
a. Hide under a pile of dirty laundry b. Hide under a sink
cabinet c. Hide behind a trash can d. Hide in a trash pile or
can
e. If the child goes outdoors, then hide behind a bush or
large tree (but be sure you really are hidden)
SOME TRICKS KIDNAPPERS AND MOLESTERS USE:
a. "Hey, kid, will you give me a hand here? Will you mail
these letters at the box over there?" But when the child
comes to be helpful, s/he must lean far into the car and gets
grabbed.
b. If someone tries to grab them into a car.
1. Twist out of jacket to get away.
2. Run in the opposite direction of the way the car is going.
c. If someone tries to grab your child in his/her yard:
1. SCREAM AND KICK AND TWIST AWAY.
d. If someone tries to grab your child off his/her bike:
1. SCREAM, and DO NOT LET GO OF THE HANDLE BARS.
e. If someone tries to break into the house:
1. CALL 911 AT ONCE. DON'T WAIT. DON'T WAIT. DON'T
WAIT.
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f. If you see an abduction, GET THE LICENSE NUMBER,

COLOR AND MAKE OF CAR, AND A DESCRIPTION OF THE
ASSAILANTS.
Possible places your child can get grabbed:
a. at an ATM while you are busy getting cash.
b. in an UNATTENDED CAR while you go into the store for
ONLY A SECOND!
These people could be molesters or carjackers who DON'T
EVEN KNOW YOUR CHILD IS IN THERE.
REMEMBER ... Molesters use DECEPTION, TRICKS,
UNIFORMS, BADGES.
a. like saying they are a GAS MAN or the POLICE.
TEACH YOUR CHILD NOT TO GO WITH ANYONE. EVER!
Very important: Teach them the trick about "Your Mom or
Dad have been hurt. They told me to take you to them now.
Come on."
Empowering Children!
Recognizing & Avoiding "Stranger Danger"

After experiencing so much heartbreak and frustration in
trying to locate missing children, I developed my own
prevention program called Smart Hearts. This differs from
other "stranger danger" programs in a few significant ways.
Instinct
Taking the lead from Gavin De Becker, America's leading
expert on violent behavior, I have incorporated Intuition-
Instinct into the safety equation. The subject of instinct has
been greatly neglected when dealing with safety, and yet, is a
vital component to self-protection.
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Smart Hearts reminds children that their feelings should

always be respected and followed when it comes to their
personal safety.
Strangers
The other significant difference in my approach to teaching
children is the issue of strangers. I instruct that all strangers
are NOT to be feared. The old adage "Don't talk to strangers"
simply doesn't work. It's not protecting our children. Children
must learn to distinguish between strangers and would-be
kidnappers.
We have got to give our children permission to listen to
their own instincts. Children who are taught to fear everyone
will hesitate to ask for assistance if they get lost or find
themselves in actual danger. A stranger may very well save
the life of your child some day.
Practical Skills
I also incorporate practical self-defense skills and
knowledge.
* Don't get in the car with anyone you don't know.
* What to do if they DO get you into the car.
* Common tricks and lures used by kidnappers and how to
resist them.
* What to do if a would be kidnapper grabs you.
* Who to ask for help if you are lost or threatened.
* Making noise.
* What to do if they have a gun.
This will all be covered in later Chapters of KID SAFE.
"...And people thought I was nuts for teaching my children
that if I don't say it's okay, it isn't, and that no one should
27
touch them where their swimsuit covers and that no one is

safe but mommy or daddy..." or who we say is safe!
Infant Safety
The baby was crawling toward the end of the boat dock
like some kind of super sonic crawling machine and I was
frantically running in place as fast as I could in a futile
attempt to reach him before he toppled off and disappeared
into the deep dark waters below. I woke with a start, looking
around in panic. Relief washed over me when I discovered it
was only a nightmare and my baby was still sleeping
peacefully beside me.
Any therapist would tell you my dream was a reflection of
the secret doubt I was harboring about my ability to care for
my new baby. I'm sure most of you know what I'm talking
about.
Whenever he looked at me with his big brown eyes full of
love, trust and total vulnerability, I felt the awesome sense of
responsibility for his complete well-being and safety. I also
felt intensely protective ... just as nature had intended, I'm
sure. That profound sense of protectiveness is an infant's only
defense against the world.
Obviously, common sense plays a big part in keeping our
precious little ones out of harms way. I often tell parents to
treat your baby like you would your purse or lap top
computer. I know it sounds simplistic, but much truth lies in
this statement.
+ If you wouldn't leave your lap top computer in plain view
in the car with the door unlocked, don't do it with your infant.
28
+ If you wouldn't leave your purse in the shopping cart

unattended, don't do it with your infant.
Intuition or instinct is the other valuable tool nature gave
us to safeguard our precious ones, yet sadly is a resource
often ignored. I don't know how many times I have heard the
stories about a mother suddenly turning around just in the
nick of time to see her baby about to tumble from a
precarious position. Unfortunately, I have heard just as many
stories of mothers who ignored their gut feelings only to
regret it later, in some cases, forever.
DAYCARE is a tough issue for many working parents these
days. For most of us, it is extremely difficult to hand our baby
over to a stranger with his packed diaper bag and tears
welling up in our eyes, and rightly so. Choosing the right
person to care for your baby is a huge task. It's also the first
of many crucial decisions you will face as a parent.
Common sense tells us the house strewn about with
marbles, small Legos and eight other children may not be the
best choice for baby. Research can teach us that this person
has been watching children for 15 years and is licensed.
Talking to other parents will give us even more insight.
Still it is our gut that tells us the most about an individual
in question. If everything seems ideal but your gut is telling
you something is wrong. It IS! It's always better to be safe
than sorry.
We've all seen the chilling stories on the news about the
parents getting suspicious about a day care provider only to
secretly videotape them and discover their worst fears are
true. Even worse are the horror stories about the illegal baby-
29
sitter kidnapping an infant and disappearing out of the

country. The first inkling that something is wrong is an
important signal to get your baby away from this person ...
NOW. Your baby cannot tell you the baby-sitter chokes or
shakes them ... but your intuition will, all you have to do is
listen. Your baby is depending on you.
Tips For Parents—Child Safety
—Know the whereabouts of your child.

—Never leave your child alone in an unattended vehicle.
—Never let your children out of your sight while shopping
in a store or mall.
—Never let your child go to a public restroom alone.
—Know the names, addresses, and parents' names of your
child's friends.
—Take pictures of your child at least once a year. If under
the age of two, four times a year.
—Write a detailed description of your child. Include height,
weight, age, eye and hair color, birthmarks, scars, moles, and
any specific physical characteristics your child may have.
—Make sure your dentist prepares full dental charts on
your child and updates them with each exam.
—Find out from your doctor where your child's medical
records are located. All permanent scars, birthmarks, broken
bones, and medical needs should be recorded.
Get To School Safely!
We all know that what children do in school is very

important. But, getting to school is also important. Some
30
children are lucky enough to live near the school, but others
have to walk long distances, ride the school bus, or take
public transportation. How can you help your child be safe on
the way to school?
Here are some things you can ...
If your child rides the bus or subway, tell your child to sit
quietly in the seat. Children should follow the directions of the
driver.
Whether your child takes the school bus or a public bus, he
or she should never play by the curb. At the subway, children
should stand away from the platform edge.
If your children walk to school, make sure they are with
friends. They should walk on the main sidewalks and not take
shortcuts through woods or empty lots.
Teach your children how to cross the street. Make sure
they know to follow the directions of the crossing guard or
safety patrol.
Joan's NOTE:
I taught my five children a little rhyme I composed to
teach them how to cross the street. Here it is—
Look once, Look twice,
The second Look can save your Life!

How ever they travel to school, teach your children not to
talk to strangers.
Give your children a whistle to blow if they are in danger.
A whistle will attract attention and may ward off a crime.
31
Make sure your child uses the seat belt if you drive to
school, even if it's nearby. Remember that most accidents
occur within 10 miles of home.
If your child bikes to school, make sure he or she wears a
helmet. Bikers should also wear bright, light colored clothing,
and, when it is getting dark, they should wear markers that
reflect light.
If your child fears other people he or she may meet on the
way to school, help plan other routes for your child to take to
school or talk with the school principal about this.
Safety Activities
Criss-Cross for young children
Help your child practice crossing the street. Teach your
child to
Cross at the corner;
Look left, right, and left again before crossing;
Watch in particular for turning cars;
Stay in the crosswalks;
If there is a traffic light, cross only when the facing light is
green or when the walk sign is on; and
Always follow the directions of the crossing guard or safety
patrol.
Role Playing—for older children
Although it may be hard for you, talk frankly with your
children and teach them some common tricks of child
molesters. You might want to play out these situations with
your child. What do you do if:
Someone asks for directions and wants you to get into a
car?
32
Someone asks for help in looking for a lost pet and leads
you into an isolated area?
Someone asks to take your picture for a TV ad and invites
you into their house or apartment?
Stay in Touch—for adults
Always call the school if your child will be absent. Make
sure the school knows how to contact you if your child does
not show up. Valuable time in looking for a lost child can be
saved if there is quick contact between the school and a
parent.
Make SURE your child's school has a policy to call at once
if a child is not in class.
Tell your child how to contact you in a hurry. Give him
your work phone number. Explain that she should leave
detailed messages if there is an emergency. Teach your child
how to call collect. Teach your child when and how to call
911.
Arrange for other parents to take your children in an
emergency or if you are going to be late.
Smart Hearts for Kids
A lesson for Parents and their Children

Strangers:
Who is a stranger and what do they look like? A stranger is
simply a person you do not know. They are normal people, so
they look just like normal people.
Are all strangers dangerous? Nope. You probably have
been taught not to talk to strangers, but I believe it's more
important to learn the difference between nice strangers and
33
dangerous strangers. In fact, from now on, I'm not going to

even call them dangerous strangers, I am going to call them
kidnappers.
Are kidnappers always men? No. Women can be
kidnappers too.
I know how to tell a kidnapper, they look creepy and
scary, right? Nope. They can look like normal people too. The
only way to tell a kidnapper is by the way they act.
How do they act? A stranger might say hello to you while
you are standing in line at the grocery store with your mom.
It's okay to be friendly with a stranger like this because you
are safe with your mom next to you. The older man who lives
down the street might wave to you on the way to school while
he is watering the grass or sweeping the driveway. He doesn't
want to hurt you either. It's okay to wave and say hello. In
fact, if you were ever being followed, this would be a good
house to run to for help.
Kidnappers act differently. They might come up to you
when you are alone and start talking to you. They ALWAYS
try to get you to go away with them. That's the easiest way
to tell a kidnapper.... they want you to go somewhere with
them. That is not okay. This is the person you need to say
"NO" to and get away from as fast as you can. I will tell you
more about their tricks to get you to go with them in a
minute.
Is there another way to spot a kidnapper? Yes. If someone
you don't know starts being very friendly and they seem
really nice, but you get this funny feeling in your stomach or
suddenly feel goose bumps on your arms or neck. That's your
34
heart telling you to be careful. Kind of like your own built in

smoke alarm. Your heart is very very smart about your
safety. Be sure and listen.
Wouldn't it be better to just stay away from all strangers?
Usually, that is a good idea, yes. But what if you get lost and
need some help? You may have to ask a stranger to help you
find your parents. You must remember that there are many
more good people in this world than bad people.
Shouldn't I ask a police man or security guard if I get lost?
Well, the problem with that idea is that there might not be a
policeman around. It's a bad idea to go off too far looking for
one either. Security guards can't always be trusted as much
as policemen.
Well, then who do I ask for help? If you are in a store, you
can ask someone who works there. If you are at the fair or
Disneyland, you can look around for someone who works
there or for another mom who makes you feel safe and ask
her to help you.
Going to School:
Try not to walk to or from school alone if you don't have
to. Find a friend to walk with or a sister or brother. If you feel
scared walking to school, tell your parents that you don't feel
safe.
If you ride the bus and you are the first one at the bus
stop each morning ask the person who takes you to the bus
stop to wait with you.
Tell an adult you trust when you feel frightened. It's
important to work something out with your parents so that
you can stay safe and they can still get to work on time.
35
Maybe your parents can meet the people who live in a house
close to your bus stop and ask them to let you sit on their
porch until other children arrive. Maybe your neighborhood
can arrange for adults who are home to be outside while
children are walking to and from school each day.
Also if your bus driver makes you uncomfortable, be sure
and tell someone this.
Tricks and Lures:
What did you mean—kidnappers use tricks to get you to go
away with them? Oh yes, kidnappers can be very tricky
people. But kids are much smarter than them. Once you know
the tricks you won't be fooled. Besides you have a smart
heart helping you to stay safe.
Will you teach me the tricks? Absolutely!
1. The Goodies Trick: That means the kidnapper will offer
to give you something if you go with them. They might tell
you they have Pokemon cards, money, candy or even a new
puppy to give you if you just follow them to their car. This is a
trick.
How many times have you been walking down the street
with your dad and he sees a kid walking alone and says "look
at that cool kid. I think I'll give him a dollar?" No way!!
The only reason someone who doesn't know you is trying
to give you stuff is to trick you into GOING WITH THEM.
And remember what I told you about people who try to get
you to go with them? That this must be a kidnapper.
What do I do if someone tries this trick on me? Say "NO".
If this person tries to keep talking to you, start yelling and
hollering like a crazy person. "FIRE, FIRE, FIRE" and run
36
home or to school or a friend's house as fast as you can. They

will probably be running away, scared too! Remember that
kidnappers don't want to get caught, so if you make lots of
noise, you will scare them.
But what if they chase me anyway and try to grab me?
They probably won't. But if they do, start waving your arms
around in big circles while you are yelling "FIRE, FIRE" as loud
as you can. Now how are they supposed to grab you when
you're waving your arms around like that? Besides, they will
decide you are just too much trouble!! And you know what?
Once you learn all of these safety rules, You WILL be WAY too
much trouble for a kidnapper and too smart for them too!!
2. The Game Trick: A tricky kidnapper might ask you to
play a game with him or her. They might offer to give you a
piggy back ride or play ball on the other side of those bushes.
While it may seem fun to be getting all of this attention, you
don't know this person and they are trying to get you to go
somewhere with them. That's what a kidnapper does!
3. The "Can You Help Me" Trick: Sometimes someone you
don't know might ask you to help them find their lost puppy.
Or they might drive up next to you and ask for directions.
They might even ask you to help them carry stuff to their car
and offer you money.
Uh oh! Your heart should be beating faster and telling you
this person is trying to get you to go somewhere with them or
get you close to their car. Sure sign of a kidnapper!! Don't fall
for this trick. It's okay to be rude and say "no!" Adults don't
need your help anyway. If they really need help they can ask
another adult.
37
What's so bad about going to their car? Remember that a

kidnapper can only hurt you if they can take you away
somewhere. The best way to do that is in a car, right? So
don't go to the car and do half of their kidnapping job for
them! No way.
What if I am walking and a car pulls up next to me and I
can't hear what the person inside is saying? It doesn't matter
what they are saying, BACK UP. No matter what, do not go
any closer to the car. In fact, it's best to run away.
Where do I run? Run toward the back of the car. That
makes it hard for the driver to chase you. The driver will have
to turn the car around before they can chase you, by that
time you can be long gone. Run home, or to the closest house
where someone is home or to school. If you are really feeling
brave, you can take a peek at the license plate in the back of
the car and help police catch the kidnapper.
4. The Friend Trick: Some kidnappers are really tricky.
They might call you by your name and pretend to know you.
They might even say they know your mom or dad and tell you
it's okay for you to go with them.
Hmmmm. This might seem confusing at first but if you
stop and think for a minute. Here is a person I don't know,
even if they are telling me they know me and they know my
name, and they are trying to get me to go away with them.
Yep, it's a kidnapper all right. Maybe they saw your name on
your backpack, or lunch or clothes.
How do I know they don't really know my mom or dad?
This one is easy. Ask them for your parent's name. Better
yet. Ask them for the password.
38
What's a password? You know how computers have

passwords? You should have one, too. Make up a secret word
with your parents and they will give it to only the people who
you are allowed to go with.
5. The Emergency Trick: This one is a dirty trick. A person
you don't know might run up to you in a big hurry and tell
you that your mom or dad has been hurt in a car accident and
they sent them to come and get you and take you to the
hospital to see them. Yikes! This is scary. It's important to
stay calm and ask for the password.
What if they don't know the password? Simple. DON'T GO.
Say "No" and get away from this person quickly.
6. The Authoritarian Trick: What's an authoritarian? It's an
important person like a policeman or security guard or
someone with a badge.
Some kidnappers will dress up in a fake uniform with a
fake badge to try and trick you into going with them. They
might tell you that you have done something bad and that
you must follow them. Remember to stay calm and listen to
your heart. It's just another mean trick!
You don't have to obey all adults if you feel that something
is wrong, especially adults you don't know. Smart Hearts kids
are too smart to fall for this trick!
Fighting Back:
Every Smart Hearts kid is strong enough to get away from
an adult. No matter what happens to you or what situation
you find yourself in, there is always something you can do to
get away. Always remember that you do not have to be a
victim and you won't be.
39
What if someone jumps out of a bush or something and

grabs me? There are lots of ways you can get away from an
adult. First and most important thing to do is start yelling and
hollering, remember? "FIRE, FIRE, FIRE!"
If the kidnapper grabs you by one arm it's easy to get
away. Don't try to pull away because that will just make you
tired. Instead take your other hand and grab his thumb and
pull it back so your arm can be free and you can run away.
What if he grabs me by both arms? Remember that his
thumbs are weaker than your whole arm. As fast as you can,
pull your arms toward his thumbs and he will lose his grip.
Keep yelling "FIRE, FIRE," and run away.
What if he covers my mouth with his hand? Bite him! If he
is close enough to cover your mouth then he is close enough
for you to kick him in the lower part of his leg or stomp on
top of his foot. As soon as he lets go ... "FIRE, FIRE, FIRE!"
What if he tells me to be quiet or he will hurt me? You
don't have to obey a person who is trying to hurt you. The
reason he wants you to be quiet is so that no one will hear
you and come to help you. Remember he doesn't want to get
caught. So yell your head off!!! It's very important not to go
with a kidnapper in a car.
When I am teaching a Smart Hearts class and I tell
someone to be quiet or I will hurt them, the whole class starts
yelling so loud they almost blow the roof off of the building.
What if he grabs me around the waist? Don't try to pull
away because this will just make you tired. Instead drop
down and twist.
40
If that doesn't work, stomp on top of his foot as hard as

you can if he is behind you.
If he is in front of you, take your hand and make it flat,
like a table. Use the part where your wrist and hand are
connected and smash him in the nose. Believe me, he will let
go.
If he has a hold of your sweater or jacket, slip out of it and
run and yell. The biggest mistake is being quiet.
What if I'm on my bike? It's important not to ride your bike
around in the street. That makes it too easy for a car to pull
up close to you, open the door and grab you.
Stay on the sidewalk as much as possible and try to only
ride with friends. The same rules apply as if you were walking
and being followed. Go in the opposite direction the car is
going. Ride to the closest safe place, jump off your bike and
run inside.
Remember to make noise too. I'm sure you know the word
by now! If the kidnapper is walking and grabs your bike, jump
off and run. Try to keep the bike between you. You can even
use the bike to throw at the kidnapper so you can start
running away.
In The Car:
Sometimes kidnappers are so fast they get you in the car
before you know what happened. So now what? Remember
that there is always something you can do to get away.
If the keys are not in the ignition yet you have a chance to
grab them away from your kidnapper and throw them as far
as you can. Now he has a big problem because if he goes to
41
find the keys you can run away but he can't take you
anywhere in the car without the keys.
What else can I do? If you have a chance before he puts
the key in the ignition you can tear a button off of your shirt
and stick it in the ignition slot. If you don't have a button, you
can try a dime, or chewing gum. Even breaking a stick off in
there would work.
What if the car is already running and he throws me in the
back seat and drives away? Climb over the seat into the front
and start honking the horn.
I know it seems scary to get too close to your kidnapper,
but it's your only choice if you want to get away. Pound on
the windows if they are closed and yell help to passing cars.
They won't be able to hear you, but they will be able to see
that you are in trouble and will call the police.
Should I grab the steering wheel? I mean, what if we
crash? It depends on how fast you are going.
If you are going kind of slow like on a street with houses
and cars parked at the curb then you should grab the steering
wheel and crash into one of them. This will make lots of noise
so people will come running out to see what happened. Then
you can start honking and yelling that you are being
kidnapped. You might even get a chance to jump out of the
car.
What should I do if we are going too fast? Make a pest of
yourself. Keep trying to honk the horn and make noise.
Remember don't make his job easy. Make him wish he had
picked a different kid!!
42
If you come to a stop light with a car in front of you, jump

down on the floor and press down on the kidnappers foot on
the gas pedal. This will make you bump into the car in front
of you. Once you get another driver involved, I know that
they will get the license plate number in case the kidnapper
tries to drive away. Soon all of the police in the city will be
looking for your kidnapper's car. If he does stop, then you
have a chance to get away.
What if he puts me in the trunk? Have your parents teach
you how to kick out the back tail lights from inside the trunk
with your feet. Once you do that, you can wave your hand out
the hole. Someone will see that and call the police.
****
JOAN'S NOTE:
Parents—if you practice this with your child so s/he can
experience what it feels like to be closed into a trunk, please
DO NOT do this experiment unless it is a cool day. Even when
temperatures are only in the high 70s, the temperature inside
the trunk of a vehicle can soar to 115 degrees in a matter of
moments and cause the child to pass out. CAUTION, please,
so there are no regrets. Thank you.
****
Remember, kids, your job is to make your kidnapper

miserable. Show them that you are not going to do what they
say and that you will not be a victim. You, after all, are a
Smart Hearts kid!
The Truth About Child Predators
43
As a private investigator who specializes in child

abductions, I know intimately how child predators operate. In
having to engage and study pedophiles I have learned much
about them. I want to pass on the bare truth to parents about
the dangers their children really face in today's world and
shed light on many common misconceptions about child
safety.
Myth 1: Teaching my children not to talk to strangers will
keep them safe.
Truth: Many of the children kidnapped from their "safe"
neighborhoods did not interact with a stranger at all but were
grabbed by someone who jumped out of a car. Predators troll
neighborhoods in search of easy targets, I know this for a
fact.
Kids need to be taught to always stay with their friends
when playing in the front yard, preferably under the
supervision of an adult, otherwise they should play in the
back yard where it is safer.
Children also need to be taught to scream, yell, kick and
fight even if the abductor threatens to hurt them if they are
not quiet. If the abductor covers their mouth with one hand,
the child needs to bite them as hard as possible and then
continue screaming FIRE, FIRE. This is extremely important.
See the KID SAFE Chapter "Smart Hearts for Kids" for
more self-defense details and how to stop from being taken
away in a car.
Myth 2: I should teach my children to fear all strangers.
44
Truth: Though this has been the common approach to the

problem over the years, I know it doesn't work for many
reasons. Children who have been taught this are too afraid to
ask anyone for help if they become lost or find themselves
being followed. This leaves them vulnerable to real danger.
Teaching children to mistrust all strangers also gives them
a very negative impression of humanity and makes them feel
powerless. Children need to learn the difference between
predators and plain old strangers.
A stranger could just save your child's life one day.
Teaching children how to effectively deal with all strangers,
good and dangerous, will empower them.
Myth 3: I should teach my child to find the nearest police
officer or security guard if they become lost.
Truth: Ted Bundy was a security guard. My next door
neighbor, who stabbed his girlfriend to death, was a security
guard. Security guards do not get background checks before
being hired. Enough said.
As for finding a police officer, this is also a bad idea. You
don't want to encourage the child to wander far off from the
place you last saw them, so finding a police officer could be
quite impractical in some situations. I encourage children to
find a person with whom they feel comfortable, possibly
another mother, and ask for help.
Myth 4: Children are usually taken from stores, fairs or
other crowded public places.
Truth: Approximately 85% of child abductions occur within
1/4 mile of the home or school.
45
The most common kidnapping scenario happens right in

front of the home or very near the home in the evening hours
between 4:00 p.m. and 6:00 p.m. when the children are
playing outside.
Children riding bikes and roller blades are often the
targets. Children walking to and from school alone are the
second favorite victim group, as with a child waiting alone at
a bus stop. The riskiest situation is a child leaving a friend's
house unescorted late at night.
Myth 5: Young children are too weak and small to fight off
an adult.
Truth: Given the proper tools any child can escape the grip
of an adult. See other KID SAFE Chapters for details. This
knowledge will empower your child.
Myth 6: Strangers present the greatest threat to kids.
Truth: While stranger abduction is very real with often
tragic consequences, stranger abductions make up a small
percentage of all missing kids in this country.
Relatives, non-custodial parents, grandparents and family
friends are the most likely to actually kidnap a child.
Molestation is even more rampant with relatives, neighbors,
friends fathers, coaches, clergy, school employees, and even
bus drivers being the common perpetrators.
Any time a child tells you they are uncomfortable with a
person, LISTEN. Denial serves only one purpose ... to keep
your child in danger.
I have little patience with parents who refuse to listen to
their children or acknowledge their discomfort. Not only do
you have to listen to your child and protect your child the way
46
nature intended for you to, you must heed your own gut
feelings about the people who interact with your child. As a
parent, this is your responsibility.
Myth 7: Coaches, clergy, camp counselors, bus drivers and
clowns are harmless.
Truth: Coaches, clergy, camp counselors, bus drivers and
clowns DO NOT require background checks before they can
interact with your child.
While you may find it personally difficult to mistrust these
people, it's important to know that these are favored
positions for pedophiles. Pedophiles have a compulsion and
obsession about children and will do whatever they can to be
near them, waiting for an opportunity to get them alone.
If you have ANY doubts about a person who interacts with
your child, listen to your gut instincts. Nothing is a stronger
indicator of problems than your own instincts. If any inkling of
doubt arises follow through and check the person out.
Intuition & Survival Signals
Nine-year-old Chris Cady was sitting on the bench waiting

for the city bus to arrive. A blue van stopped at the curb and
a woman got out. She smiled at Chris and told him that she
was very sorry but his bus had broken down and she was
there to take him to his destination.
Chris looked at the nice lady and then at the van.
Suddenly a chill shot up his spine and his muscles tightened.
He didn't see any other people in the van—in fact, he couldn't
see into the van at all because the windows were dark. The
perceptive young boy also noticed there were no identifying
47
markings on the van. The lady seemed very nice though and
he certainly didn't want to be late. But Chris decided to heed
his doubt and declined the ride. Indignant, the woman got
into her van and sped away.
Not two minutes later, the bus arrived. I shudder to think
what would have happened if Chris had shrugged off his gut
feelings and gotten into that van. A street-wise kid, Chris had
been riding the San Francisco city bus unescorted since the
tender age of 7. The product of two full-time working parents,
Chris was thrust into the precarious position of self-protection
at a ripe age. As a result, his survival instincts were honed to
razor sharpness by age 9.
Comparable to a smoke alarm, our own inner-alarm starts
ringing at the first hint of impending danger. The signal may
be subtle; just a twinge of doubt and anxiety, or as powerful
as a sudden rush of fear or a chill that washes over us like a
wave of Arctic air.
Children decidedly have the advantage over adults in
heeding these instincts because they haven't yet been taught
to talk themselves out of their feelings. An adult will chide
themselves for being "silly" or "paranoid." While this rationale
is completely foreign to children.
Safety expert, Gavin De Becker in his book "Protecting the
Gift" writes, "A woman is standing with her young daughter
waiting for an elevator and when the doors open she sees a
man inside who causes her apprehension. She feels fear. How
does she respond to nature's strongest survival signal? She
suppresses it, telling herself: I am not going to live like that,
I'm not going to insult this guy by letting the door close in his
48
face. She tells her self to stop being so silly and gets into the
elevator with her daughter."
Now which is sillier—letting the door close on a complete
stranger who scares her, OR getting into a soundproof steel
chamber with the man she is afraid of to protect his feelings?
Over the years, the young Chris Cady had learned to
respect doubt—if only all of us were so wise.
Internet Safety
Dear Parent,
This section I'd say is required reading for any adult who
cares about youngsters on the internet. I wanted to share it
with you. Please pass it on. I have teeny bopper and full-
fledged teen grandchildren who are often online so this
message struck a cord with me, too. Please read and heed,
Parents.
If you know of any kids who hang out online and in chat
rooms ... Or if you're a parent or relative or friend of kids who
hang out online and chat ... PLEASE READ THIS!
It could very well be the difference between life and death.
Here's the story...
Shannon could hear the footsteps behind her as she
walked toward home. The thought of being followed made her
heart beat faster. "You're being silly," she told herself, "no
one is following you."
To be safe, she began to walk faster, but the footsteps
kept up with her pace. She was afraid to look back and she
was glad she was almost home. Shannon said a quick prayer,
49
"God please get me home safe." She saw the porch light
burning and ran the rest of the way to her house.
Once inside, she leaned against the door for a moment,
relieved to be in the safety of her home. She glanced out the
window to see if anyone was there. The sidewalk was empty.
After tossing her books on the sofa, she decided to grab a
snack and get on-line. She logged on under her screen name
ByAngel213. She checked her Buddy List and saw GoTo123
was on. She sent him an instant message: ByAngel213: Hi
I'm glad you are on! I thought someone was following me
home today. It was really weird!
GoTo123: LOL You watch too much TV. Why would
someone be following you? Don't you live in a safe
neighborhood?
ByAngel213: Of course I do. LOL I guess it was my
imagination 'cuz I didn't see anybody when I looked out.
GoTo123: Unless you gave your name out on-line. You
haven't done that, have you?
ByAngel213: Of course not. I'm not stupid you know.
GoTo123: Did you have a softball game after school today?
ByAngel213: Yes and we won!!
GoTo123: That's great! Who did you play?
ByAngel213: We played the Hornets. LOL. Their uniforms
are so gross! They look like bees. LOL
GoTo123: What is your team called?
ByAngel213: We are the Canton Cats. We have tiger paws
on our uniforms. They are really kewl.
GoTo123: Did you pitch?
50
ByAngel213: No I play second base. I got to go. My

homework has to be done before my parents get home. I
don't want them mad at me. Bye!
GoTo123: Catch you later. Bye.
Meanwhile....
GoTo123 went to the member menu and began to search
for her profile. When it came up, he highlighted it and printed
it out. He took out a pen and began to write down what he
knew about Angel so far.
Her name: Shannon
Birthday: Jan. 3, 1985
Age: 13
State where she lived: North Carolina
Hobbies: softball, chorus, skating and going to the mall.
Besides this information, he knew she lived in Canton
because she had just told him. He knew she stayed by herself
until 6:30 p.m. every afternoon until her parents came home
from work. He knew she played softball on Thursday
afternoons on the school team, and the team was named the
Canton Cats. Her favorite number 7 was printed on her
jersey. He knew she was in the seventh grade at the Canton
Junior High School. She had told him all this in the
conversations they had on-line. He had enough information to
find her now.
Shannon didn't tell her parents about the incident on the
way home from the ball park that day. She didn't want them
to make a scene and stop her from walking home from the
softball games. Parents were always overreacting and hers
were the worst. It made her wish she was not an only child.
51
Maybe if she had brothers and sisters, her parents wouldn't

be so overprotective.
By Thursday, Shannon had forgotten about the footsteps
following her. Her game was in full swing when suddenly she
felt someone staring at her. It was then that the memory
came back. She glanced up from her second base position to
see a man watching her closely. He was leaning against the
fence behind first base and he smiled when she looked at
him. He didn't look scary and she quickly dismissed the fear
she had felt.
After the game, he sat on a bleacher while she talked to
the coach. She noticed his smile once again as she walked
past him. He nodded and she smiled back. He noticed her
name on the back of her shirt. He knew he had found her.
Quietly, he walked a safe distance behind her. It was only a
few blocks to Shannon's home, and once he saw where she
lived he quickly returned to the park to get his car.
Now he had to wait.
He decided to get a bite to eat until the time came to go to
Shannon's house. He drove to a fast food restaurant and sat
there until time to make his move.
Shannon was in her room later that evening when she
heard voices in the living room. "Shannon, come here," her
father called. He sounded upset and she couldn't imagine
why. She went into the room to see the man from the
ballpark sitting on the sofa. "Sit down," her father began,
"This man has just told us a most interesting story about
you."
52
Shannon moved cautiously to a chair across from the man.

How could he tell her parents anything? She had never seen
him before today!
"Do you know who I am Shannon?" the man asked.
"No," Shannon answered.
"I am a police officer and your online friend, GoTo123."
Shannon was stunned. "That's impossible! GoTo is a kid
my age! He's 14 and he lives in Michigan!"
The man smiled. "I know I told you all that, but it wasn't
true. You see Shannon there are people on-line who pretend
to be kids; I was one of them. But while others do it to find
kids and hurt them, I belong to a group of parents who do it
to protect kids from predators.
"I came here to find you to teach you how dangerous it is
to give out too much information to people on-line. You told
me enough about yourself to make it easy for me to find you.
Your name, the school you went to, the name of your ball
team and the position you played. The number and name on
your jersey just made finding you a breeze."
Shannon was stunned. "You mean you don't live in
Michigan?"
He laughed. "No, I live in Raleigh. It made you feel safe to
think I was so far away, didn't it?"
She nodded.
"I had a friend whose daughter was like you. Only she
wasn't as lucky. The guy found her and murdered her while
she was home alone. Kids are taught not to tell anyone when
they are alone, yet they do it all the time on-line.
53
The wrong people trick you into giving out information a

little here and there on-line. Before you know it, you have
told them enough for them to find you without even realizing
you have done it. I hope you've learned a lesson from this
and won't do it again."
"I won't," Shannon promised solemnly.
"Will you tell others about this so they will be safe too?"
"It's a promise!"
That night Shannon and her dad and mom all knelt down
together and prayed. They thanked God for protecting
Shannon from what could have been a tragic situation.
Author Unknown
Shocking, how much information even we as adults
sometimes innocently pass along, isn't it?
BEWARE AND TAKE CARE!
The Quest for a Missing Child
As I sat across from the petite woman who seemed to be

looking right through me I could feel the horror she was
experiencing, but I couldn't even begin to imagine it. Silently,
I prayed that I never would. She was reliving any parent's
worst nightmare as she sat there explaining to me how her
11-year-old daughter had vanished off the street in just a
matter of seconds, just six months ago.
Child abduction by a stranger is the most horrific of
missing person cases. For any of you who have experienced
this nightmare you are the bravest souls I have ever seen. If
you are one of these parents please contact me immediately
and I will see if I can provide some insight and guidance
54
(beware of psychics who approach you or want to charge you

for this). When a child goes missing, the first few hours are
extremely crucial.
The First Step ...
Contact the police. Don't hesitate because those few
minutes or hours are critical.
The Second Step ...
If you know or suspect that your child has been abducted
contact your local radio station with a description of your child
and what the child is wearing and ask them to put the word
out immediately so people will be watching for your child.
This tactic works amazingly well.
The Third Step ...
Contact the National Center for Missing and Exploited
Children. www.ncme.org/ They will give you the support you
need during this mind numbing time.
Parental child abductions are more common and thankfully
much easier to solve.
If you are fortunate enough to have your children safe at
home please read the Smart Hearts Chapters on prevention in
KID SAFE.
How YOU Can Make A Difference
We all realize the complexity of our society's ills, but many

of us have differing opinions on the cure. I have several
practical suggestions, which I will outline below, but first I
would like to address the problems. Teaching self-defense,
setting up neighborhood watches, etc., are highly
recommended, and yet are only surface fixes.
55
Society is caught in a vicious cycle that must be broken.

Adults have got to stop abusing children, thus creating more
abusers. Period.
We are creating a new generation of abusers as surely as I
sit here and write this. Violence against children and sexual
molestation are running rampant in this country and yet
receive very little attention from politicians and the media.
Why isn't this problem being addressed?
Look at all of the "stop smoking" messages and public
pressure against tobacco companies these days.
Look at the police and political force against drug use.
Great! But what about child molestation? What about our
future generation?
Sure, we are talking about it more openly than we did 20
or even ten years ago, but has that decreased the aberrant
behavior? Not in the least. Talking about it doesn't stop it. We
have to start doing something about it.
I was shocked in one of my investigations to learn that a
registered sex offender in the state of Arizona was allowed to
live with his 12-year-old step-daughter after his release from
jail. No questions asked. No social workers questioning her.
This offender was arrested for exposing himself to a 13-year
old girl.
Why do our laws allow this? Obviously, if the mother is not
taking steps to protect her own child, then I feel society
should.
So what can YOU actually DO to make a difference?
1 Speak to every child you meet, with courtesy and
kindness. It really doesn't take much effort to make a positive
56
impact on a child's life who may have little going for them at
home.
2 Treat your own children the way you wanted to be
treated as a child. Be the parent you longed for. If you were
abused, then break the cycle, here and now. Stop the blame
game and use your life to make a difference in the world.
3 Give up denial. Your children will not tell you they are
being abused if they already know you won't believe them.
Denial is very dangerous.
4 Write your local politicians and find out what they are
doing to stop child abuse, sexual abuse in particular.
5 Get involved. Be aware that 85% of child abductions
occur within 1/4 mile of the home or school. It is also true
that an unusual number of children are swiped off the street
in the late afternoon and evening hours. These statistics are
very disturbing to me because this is preventable.
Organize a "protect our children" Neighborhood committee.
Retired folks and others whose schedules permit, can
volunteer to sit outside or cruise the neighborhood in their car
while children are walking to and from school. Start knocking
on doors, talking to your neighbors and pulling together to
safeguard our children.
Bring back "safe houses" with the sign in the window
letting children know they can run there for help if needed.
There is no reason our children should be left vulnerable to
predators. I believe every new home should be required to
have a front porch to encourage more community and activity
in our neighborhoods.
57
6 Report abuse that you know is occurring. That child has

no one else but you to step in and help them.
7 Talk to your child's principal about bringing safety
classes to your child's school. Self defense and stranger
safety classes empower children. When a child knows they
can protect themselves against bullies or kidnappers they can
stop living in fear.
We teach fire safety, traffic safety, how to dial 911, but we
don't teach personal safety. Why not?
Contact me or Joan for more information on making a
difference in your community or to arrange a speaking
engagement for your group or school.
iampam@earthlink.net hijoan@JoanBramsch.com
Missing Adults
There are two categories of missing adults.

Missing because they have become victims, or missing
because they want to vanish. There is also the unusual
occasion where a person may be missing because they are
hurt or lost.
It can be difficult to determine which category a missing
adult belongs in until some investigation has been done.
Someone you have simply lost touch with is not considered
missing and I will give some tips on tracking down old friends
and loved ones later in the article.
The biggest difficulty with missing adults can be police
cooperation.
If the police do not believe that foul play is involved, they
will do little to help you locate someone over the age of 18.
58
They will mentally put them into the "missing because they
want to be" category and usually don't have the time to put
into these cases.
What you must do is file a missing persons report right
away and request that you be given an NCIC number.
This will put your missing person into a national law
enforcement database. Very important. I have seen really
difficult missing person cases solved thanks to NCIC.
You may have to consider hiring a private investigator to
help you in your quest. Choose carefully.
It is imperative that you hire someone who specializes in
missing persons, as many PI's have never done this type of
work and won't have a clue what to do once they come up
empty handed from all of the data bases they normally use.
In searching for a missing adult you must remember that
humans are creatures of habit. Often enough those habits
give important clues to tracking them down.
Police should handle adults who may be victims with
diligence. Most families of missing persons are very frustrated
by the lack of information they receive from detectives. While,
it can be painful and frustrating, the police do this for
important reasons.
If you honestly feel that your case is not being handled
well or has been put on the shelf you might want to contact
your local newspaper. Write a letter to the editor at the very
least or see if they will run a story on your unsolved mystery.
Public pressure will usually stir things up. If all else fails, you
may have to hire a private detective.
59
Finding long lost friends and relatives can be relatively

simple.
Sadly, most people go about it the wrong way and end up
discouraged and mistrusting. My strongest advice is to
beware such places as Internet sites and others that promise
"success or your money back". These places will give you a
list about a foot long of people with the same name as your
missing person and you get to wade through them. When you
discover that none of them is the right Bill Brown you will be
even more disillusioned when you learn that you won't get
your money back because of all the "hits" you got.
My advice is that you hire someone like myself who can
run a social security number for a reasonable price and come
up with the right Bill Brown.
Unless a person is trying to hide, this is the quickest most
reliable way to locate someone and it's less costly. If you
don't have the social security number, a birthday, last known
address or full name can also prove helpful.
There are also places you can check out yourself for free
such as www.whowhere.com, which is basically a nation wide
white pages. Another one of my favorite sites is
www.anybirthday.com, which is also free.
Don't forget www.ancestry.com if you are looking for
family members and for war veterans—
members.aol.com/dadswar/index.htm
Best of luck to you in your quest!
Is Someone Hurting You?
A Resource
60
U.S. Department of Justice Help for Victims

If Someone Is Hurting You, Help Is Available! Information
on finding the help you need includes referrals on victims'
rights, services, and criminal justice resources.
Here are national toll-free numbers that are available to
you 24 hours a day:
Child Help USA—National Child Abuse Hotline: 800-422-
4453.
RX Abuse—Center on Domestic Violence: 800-313-1310.
Clearinghouse on Child Abuse and Neglect: 800-394-3366.
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-7233.
Office for Victims of Crime Resource Center: 800-627-
6872.
Print out this list of numbers and post it by the telephone
so you'll have it in case of a crisis.
In Closing
I sincerely hope the information in KID SAFE has provided

you with the foundation for Operation Protection for your
child.
Your guidance, your instruction and your unflagging
interest and care for your child's welfare will keep her or him
safe. If you do the best that you can, then your best should
do the job!
We cannot obsess over this real danger; the odds are quite
low. Less than 500 children are kidnapped by strangers in any
year; in fact, though you might not believe it due to
continuous national coverage, less children were kidnapped in
2002, than in 2001.
61
And yet, we must remain cautious because the real danger

is there, for any child or teen who hasn't been taught the
Rules, who doesn't know how to protect him or herself if the
odds should fall against the child. The real danger—and
perhaps the final danger—is that the kidnapper or the
molester will succeed if your child remains uninformed and
untrained in the skills needed to foil the perverts.
With all my heart, I hope you will take this book seriously
and keep your KID SAFE!
Finally, as I requested in the Introduction of KID SAFE, I
ask once more:
If you own a company or work for a company you feel
would welcome the opportunity to do a print run of KID SAFE
with the company logo on the cover, I certainly would
welcome the opportunity to speak to them.
Here's my web site:
www.empoweredparent.com/
Here's my email address:
book@JoanBramsch.com
I also welcome feedback from you.
Tell me how KID SAFE has made a difference in the lives of
your family members.
Remember, Information banishes fear!
Thank you very much.
For the Children, with love,
Joan Bramsch
THE END ... OF FEAR = KNOWLEDGE
Additional Free Resources
62
to help keep your child safe.

Please be patient while waiting for these pdf books to open
online.
Also, be sure to save them on your computer by clicking
"File" and then "Save As" in the top left-hand corner of the
screen. This will allow you to save the file to the folder of your
choice.
The Kid Safe Resource Supplement:
TABLE OF CONTENTS:
Read Aloud Stories

What Does The FBI Do To Help You?
To Be Safe
Real Life True Stores & Rules of Safety
Helpful Tips
Potential Runaways
For Children & Teens, The Rules
Safety Tips For Parents
What To Do If Your Child Is Missing
Be Safe/Get Help
Know The Rules, For Girls 11-17 Years
Internet Safety
If We Really Want To Keep Our Children Safe
30 Ways to Stay Safe Online
Internet Guidelines
Free Print Resources
Download your free copy here:
63
www.joanbramsch.com/books/KS-resource-
supplement.pdf
more on next page
When Your Child Is Missing: A Family Survival Guide:
www.joanbramsch.com/books/When-Child-Is-Missing.pdf
(This is a very large file, so please be extra patient while
opening. Thanks.)
Table of Contents
Foreword
Acknowledgments
Introduction
Checklist: What You Should Do When Your Child Is First
Missing
Chapter 1: The Search
Your Role in the Search: The First 48 Hours
The Role of Law Enforcement in the Search
The Role of Volunteers in the Search
After the First 48 Hours: The Long-Term Search
The Role of Private Detectives and Psychics in the Long-
Term Search
Key Points
Checklist: Gathering Evidence in the First 48 Hours
Chapter 2: Law Enforcement
Your Partnership With Law Enforcement
Key Points
Checklist: Working With Law Enforcement
Chapter 3: The Media
Media Involvement: The First 48 Hours
Media Involvement: After the First 48 Hours
64
Key Points
Checklist: Conducting Interviews With the Media
Chapter 4: Photo and Flier Distribution
Photo and Flier Distribution: The First 48 Hours
Photo and Flier Distribution: After the First 48 Hours
Key Points
Checklist: Distributing Fliers
Chapter 5: Volunteers
Making the Best Use of Volunteers
Using Untrained Volunteers in the Search Effort
Using Trained Volunteers in the Search Effort
Key Points
Checklist: Working With Volunteer Searchers
Chapter 6: Rewards and Donations
Monetary Rewards
Monetary Donations
Key Points
Checklist: Selecting a Tipline for Leads
Chapter 7: Personal and Family Considerations
Regaining Your Emotional and Physical Strength
Mentally Preparing for the Long Term
Helping Your Children To Regain Their Physical and
Emotional Strength
Helping Extended Family Members To Regain Their
Physical and Emotional Strength
Key Points
Checklist: Figuring Out How To Pay Your Bills
Recommended Readings
Additional Resources
65
About the Parent Authors

www.joanbramsch.com/books/When-Child-Is-Missing.pdf
Sex Offender Information by State
All fifty states now have a sex offender registry in place.

How and what information is obtained varies widely from
state to state. Below is the latest information on how to
obtain sex offender information by state.
ALABAMA
Alabama Department of Public Safety www.gsiweb.net/
Search by name, city, county or ZIP code. Information in
the database includes name, address, date of birth, physical
description, crime committed and graphic description of the
crime. The user can view a map showing the approximate
location where the sex offender lives. When available,
photographs of sex offenders are posted.
The site also offers a listing of sex offenders with no known
addresses and sex offenders who intend to relocate to within
the state of Alabama.
The following also list local registered sex offenders.
Athens Police Department, www.athenspd.org
Calhoun County Sheriff's Office,
www.calhouncountysheriff.org
Russell County Sheriff's Office, www.rcso.org/sex2.htm/
Walker County Sheriff's Office,
www.walkercounty.com/sexoffenders.htm
ALASKA
Alaska Department of Public Safety
www.dps.state.ak.us/nSorcr/asp/
66
Alaska Department of Public Safety's Sex Offender Central

Registry maintains an alphabetical listing of more than 1,500
sex offenders in the state. U. S. District Court Judge H. Russel
Holland issued a preliminary injunction on January 29, 2002,
enjoining the state from the enforcement of the Alaska Sex
Offender Registration Act against persons whose crimes were
committed before August 10, 1994. This website is now
limited to information about persons who committed
qualifying offenses on or after August 10, 1994.
ARIZONA
Arizona Department of Public Safety
www.azsexoffender.org/
Sex Offender InfoCenter and database of registered sex
offenders residing in the state. The site does not contain
information on all convicted sex offenders! Information is only
provided for sex offenders released from jail/prison or
sentenced to probation on or after June 1,1996 with risk
assessment scores of Level 2 (Intermediate) or Level 3
(High)! The sex offenders are listed by name and ZIP code.
The site also includes a separate list of sex offenders
whose whereabouts are unknown.
ARKANSAS
Arkansas Crime Information Center www.acic.org
This web site provides information on the state law, the
types of transgressions that require registration and the
number of registered offenders in each county, but does not
provide information on individual sex offenders. Contact your
local sheriff's office for procedures on obtaining sex offender
information.
67
CALIFORNIA
The state of California does not provide a Web site with
information on or names of registered sex offenders. This
information is distributed by the state through the use of a
CD-ROM available at local law enforcement agencies. Call
your local sheriff's office for procedures and viewing hours.
California also provides a Sex Offender Identification Line (1-
900-463-0400) for a fee of $10.
COLORADO
Colorado Bureau of Investigation
sor.state.co.us/default.asp
This excellent site not only lets you search for offender by
name, city or zip code, it also provides loads of information
on sex offenders, sexual predators and sex offender laws.
CONNECTICUT
Connecticut no longer offers sex offender information over
the internet. At the time of this writing there was also no
statewide name check system. See your local sheriff's office
for information on sex offenders in your area.
DELAWARE
Delaware State Police
www.state.de.us/dsp/sexoff/index.htm
Offenders are listed in alphabetical order. Information
includes offender's name, address, sex, date of birth, city of
residence and ZIP code, police department in charge of
registration and a telephone number of the responsible police
agency.
FLORIDA
68
Florida Department of Law Enforcement

www.fdle.state.fl.us/sexualpredators
One of the nation's best Internet sites for identifying
sexual predators. ("Sexual Predator" is the most serious
classification of sexual offender.) Search by city, county or
name. Offenders can also be identified through a 24-hour, 7
day a week toll free hotline. 888-FL-PREDATOR From outside
Florida call 850-413-9387
GEORGIA
Georgia Bureau of Investigation
www.ganet.org/gbi/sorsch.cgi
Georgia maintains a database of 2,300 sex offenders
released from prison or currently on parole or probation.
Search the site by city, county, ZIP code and name of
offender. The Georgia Bureau of Investigation (GBI) updates
the site each month based on information provided to it by
the state prisons, parole boards or county sheriffs. Current
information on each sex offender includes name, street and
city of residence, physical characteristics, date of birth and
crime committed. In order to complete registration in the
state of Georgia, the offender must either have been released
from prison or placed on probation, parole or supervised
release after July 1, 1996. If an offender who is registered in
another state moves to Georgia, the offender is required to
register in the state of Georgia.
The following cities and/or counties list local sex offenders.
Cherokee County Sheriff's Office, www.cherokeega-
sheriff.org/offender/offender.htm
69
Columbia County Sheriff's Office,

www.columbiacountyso.org/offenders.htm
Cherokee Sheriff's Office, www.cherokeega-
sheriff.org/offender/offender.htm
Columbia County Sheriff's Office,
www.columbiacountyso.org/offenders.htm
DeKalb County Sheriff's Office,
www.dekalbsheriff.org/regnames3.html
Floyd County Sheriff's Office,
www.romegeorgia.com/Sheriff/sexoffenders.html
Gwinnett County Sheriff's Department,
www.gwinnettcountysheriff.com/predat1.htm
Oconee County, www.oconeesheriff.org/sexoff/index.html
Richmond County Sheriff's Office,
www.co.richmond.ga.us/rcsd/CID/offenders/index.htm
Whitfield County Sheriff's Office,
www.wcso.com/sex%20offender%20disclamer.html
HAWAII:
**On November 21, 2001, the Hawaii Supreme Court
struck down Hawaii's sex offender registration law as
unconstitutional. Based on the ruling, the state is no longer
allowed to give notice to the community on whether a person
is a sex offender.**
LOUISIANA
Louisiana State Police www.lasocpr.lsp.org/socpr/
Search by name, city, parish or zip code. Information on
the offender includes name, and any known aliases, address,
work, description and photograph, date of registration and
conviction record.
70
MAINE
Maine does not provide internet access to sexual offender
information. For the entire list of sex offenders convicted after
June 30, 1992, send $7 to Maine State Police, Bureau of
Identification, 3600 Hospital Street, Augusta, ME 04330
MARYLAND
Department of Public Safety and Correctional Services
www.dpscs.state.md.us/sor/onlineview.shtml
Lists offenders alphabetically or grouped by category of
offense. Gives name, address, photo if available, description
of crime and law enforcement contact information.
MASSACHUSETTS
Commonwealth of Massachusetts
www.state.ma.us/sorb/infoaboutSO.htm
This site does not give specific information on sex
offenders but it does give instructions on how to obtain this
information through your local police department.
MICHIGAN
Michigan State Police
www.mipsor.state.mi.us/mipsor/default.htm
Search by name and estimated age or by zip code.
Offender's name, date of birth, address, physical description,
and offense are listed.
MINNESOTA
Minnesota Department of Corrections
www.corr.state.mn.us/level3/level3.asp
Only level 3 offenders (sexual predators) are listed on this
site. The three classifications of sexual offenders are
71
described here. User can search by name, city, county or zip

code.
MISSISSIPPI
Mississippi Department of Public Safety
www.sor.mdps.state.ms.us/
Search by last name, city, county or zip code. Name, race,
physical description, date of birth and address are listed. A
photograph is also shown if available.
MISSOURI
Missouri does not provide registered sex offender
information on-line. Contact your local sheriff's office for
instructions on obtaining this information. Contact: Tammy
Byrd—Missouri State Patrol General Headquarters—(573)
526-6347.
MONTANA
Montana Department of Justice
svor2.doj.state.mt.us:8010/index.htm
Search by last name, county, city or zip code. Site gives
name and any known aliases, address, offense and
registering agency contact information. Pictures if available.
NEBRASKA
Nebraska State Patrol www.sor.mdps.state.ms.us/
This site only lists Level 3 or high risk sex offenders. These
are offenders who law enforcement believe are at risk of re-
offending and pose a greater risk to the community. View the
entire list or search by zip code. Name, date of birth, address,
crime committed and photographs are provided.
NEVADA
72
Nevada does not have a Web site. Local law enforcement

authorities handle the dissemination of information and
notification about registered sex offenders. Contact: Grace
George, DMV/Public Safety Division (775) 687-1600.
NEW HAMPSHIRE
The state of New Hampshire does not provide information
on the Internet concerning registered sex offenders. Please
contact your local law enforcement agency to obtain this
information.
NEW JERSEY
New Jersey State Police
www.njsp.org/info/regsexoffend.html
This is hands down the best site I have seen on sexual
offenders. It offers a geographic search (by county), a name
search, a vehicle search and an advanced search which allows
you to search by name or physical description. Information
returned includes a photograph, name and aliases, physical
description, and date of birth. What makes this site so good is
that it gives the model, make and license plate of the
offender's vehicle and describes his mode of operandi.
Excellent information.
NEW MEXICO
New Mexico Department of Public Safety
www.nmsexoffender.dps.state.nm.us/
Search this excellent site by name, city, county, zip code,
or view the entire state listing. Absconders are also listed.
This thorough site gives a detailed report on each offender.
Name (including aliases), date of birth, date and place of
conviction, physical description (including tatoos, scars or
73
marks), home address, a photograph and the date it was

taken are all listed. Also reported are date of registration and
offense committed.
NEW YORK
New York State Criminal Justice System does not provide
specific information regarding sex offenders online. However,
they do have a Sex Offender Registry Information Line
1-900-288-3838.
Employers, parents, children's groups and the general
public can call to determine whether an individual is a
convicted sex offender who is required to register.
Caller requirement: To request information you must be at
least 18 years old and must provide your name, address and
telephone number.
Hours: The Information Line is open Monday through
Friday from 8:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.; it is not open on State
holidays.
Fee: For a fee of $.50 (fifty cents), which will appear on
your telephone bill, you can inquire about up to five
individuals.
Necessary information: To learn the status of an individual,
a caller must have the individual's name and at least one of
the following identifiers: the individual's street address and
apartment number, driver's license number, social security
number, or birth date. Additional information (i.e., eye color,
hair color, ethnicity, height, weight, and distinctive markings)
may be helpful but is not required.
What information will be provided by the 900 staff: Sex
Offender Registry hotline staff will search the database to
74
determine whether an individual is listed in the Registry. For

offenders who committed an act prior to enactment of the law
(January 21, 1996) and had a risk level assigned prior to
January 1, 2000, callers will be told only that the offender has
registered but that no other information can be provided at
this time due to a Federal court injunction. If an offender's
name is listed on the Registry and the offender committed an
offense on or after January 21, 1996 or the risk level assigned
after January 1, 2000, the caller will be told the level of risk
of re-offense by the offender in question.
NORTH CAROLINA
North Carolina State Bureau of Investigation
sbi.jus.state.nc.us/DOJHAHT/SOR/Default.htm
Search this site by zip code, city, county and/or status,
name and/or age. This excellent site gives a detailed report
on each offender. Name (including aliases), date of birth, date
and place of conviction, physical description (including
tattoos, scars or marks), home address, a photograph and
the date it was taken are all listed. Also reported are date of
registration and offense committed. An address history is also
given.
NORTH DAKOTA
North Dakota Attorney General
www.ndsexoffender.com/scripts/bci.ag/owSearch.w
This site can be searched by name, city, county or zip
code. Offender information includes, name, date of birth,
physical description, photograph and home address. Offense
information is also included.
OHIO
75
The state of Ohio does not provide a Web site with the
names or information regarding registered sex offenders. The
release of information and other related matters regarding
registered sex offenders is handled by local law enforcement
agencies. If your county is not listed below, go to your local
sheriff's office for information on sex offenders in your
county.
University of Akron Police,
www3.uakron.edu/police/sexoff.htm
Clark County Sheriff,
www.clarkcountysheriff.com/sexualoffenders.html
Cuyahoga County Sheriff,
www.cuyahoga.oh.us/sheriff/law/sexualoffenders.htm
Franklin County Sheriff, www.sheriff.franklin.oh.us/
Hamilton County Sheriff's Office,
www.hcso.org/PublicServices/SexOffenders/offender.asp
Medina County Sheriff's Office,
www.medinasheriff.com/SORN/Sex%20offender%201.htm
Stark County Sheriff, www.sheriff.co.stark.oh.us/pr01.htm
Summit County Sheriff,
www.co.summit.oh.us/sheriff/sexoffenders01.htm
OKLAHOMA
The state of Oklahoma does not provide Internet access to
the names and other information about registered sex
offenders. Members of the public interested in obtaining
information about registered sex offenders can write
(Oklahoma Department of Corrections, Attn: Records, P.O.
Box 11400, Oklahoma City, OK 73136), telephone (405/425-
2500) or email (osjimr@doc.state.ok.us) the state
76
Department of Corrections. The files of registered sex

offenders can be accessed in person at the Department of
Corrections' Oklahoma City Office. The following
cities/counties list sex offenders on line.
Altus Police, www.intellisys.net/APD/register.htm
Bartlesville Police,
www.cityofbartlesville.org/departments/police/sexoffenders/in
dex.htm
Bixby Police, www.bixby.com/police/offenders.htm
Blaine County Sheriff,
www.pldi.net/~blaineso/blainecountysexualpredatorpa.htm
Broken Arrow Police, www.city.broken-
arrow.ok.us/reg/register.htm
Claremore Police,
www.claremorepolice.com/offenders.html
Creek County Sheriff,
www.creekcountysheriff.com/SexOffenders/index.htm
Custer County Sheriff,
www.geocities.com/capitolhill/senate/2189/sexreg.html
Enid Police, www.enid.org/police/registered.htm
Grandfield Police, www.law-
enforcement.org/grandfieldpd/rso.html
Oklahoma County Sheriff,
www.oklahomacounty.org/sheriff/registeredsexoffenders.htm
Osage County, www.ocso.net/sexoff.html
Owasso Police, cityofowasso.com/sexoffenders.htm
Sapulpa Police, www.sapulpapolice.com/sexoffenders.htm
Seminole County,
www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/3831/sexoff.htm
77
Stillwater Police,
www.stillwaterpolicedept.org/sexoffenders.htm
Tulsa Police, www.tulsapolice.org/sexreg/
Tulsa County,
www.tcso.org/sexoffenderlist/datasheetsexoffenders.htm
OREGON
Ohio does not maintain an online sex offender registry, but
the Ohio Department of Rehabilitation and Correction does
provide an online offender database search at
www.drc.state.oh.us/cfdocs/inmate/search.htm.
Community members can also contact local law
enforcement agencies and request information on registered
offenders either individually or lists of offenders by zip code.
For individuals designated as sexual predators notifications
have included television and radio announcements,
community meetings, newspaper articles, door-to-door flyers,
and posting of the offender's residence. Method dependent
upon geographic location and population density. Notice may
include: name, address, physical description, type of vehicle
driven, any conditions of probation, parole or conditions of
release, description of primary and secondary targets and
method of offense, current photograph, and probation or
parole officer's name or phone number.
Benton County Sheriff's Office
www.co.benton.or.us/sheriff/corrections/bccc/sonote/index.ht
m
This site shows photographs of a few "predatory sex
offenders" living in the Benton County area.
PENNSYLVANIA
78
The state of Pennsylvania does not provide Internet access

to the names of or information about registered sex
offenders. Members of the general public may request
community notification flyers or information concerning
sexually violent predators in a particular community by
visiting the chief law enforcement officer in that community.
In jurisdictions where the Pennsylvania State Police is the
primary law enforcement agency, members of the general
public may make such requests at the local Pennsylvania
State Police station in that community. Notice of the sexually
violent predator's presence is provided to neighbors of the
sexually violent predator who live or work within 250 feet of
the predator's residence or the 25 most immediate residences
and places of employment in proximity to the predator's
residence, whichever is greater.
RHODE ISLAND
Rhode Island does not disseminate sexual offender
information over the internet and no statewide name check is
available to the general public. For Risk Level III (high risk)
offenders, the local law enforcement agency may notify
individual members of the community, establishments, and
organizations, and use a variety of methods to achieve the
result including the use of fact sheets, fliers, news releases,
advertisements, computerized access to fact sheet
information, and/or public access to fact sheets at agency
offices. (Offenders subject to notification are so informed and
have right to judicial review.) For Risk Level II (moderate
risk) offenders, schools, daycare, and other organizations that
serve people whom the offender might victimize are notified.
79
For schools and daycare centers, law enforcement must notify

each parent. For Risk Level I (low risk) offenders, law
enforcement access only.
SOUTH CAROLINA
South Carolina Law Enforcement Division
www.sled.state.sc.us/SLED/default.asp?Category=SCSO&Ser
vice=SCSO01
Search by name, city, county or zip code. This basic site
gives the name, physical description, date of birth and
address of the offender.
SOUTH DAKOTA
The state of South Dakota does not have a Web site with
information about or the names of registered sex offenders.
The Division of Criminal Investigation (DCI) sexual offender
registration file is available to all law enforcement agencies on
a twenty-four hour basis, but is not open to inspection by the
public. However, the registration information is public at the
local law enforcement level and may be viewed by the public.
TENNESSEE
Tennessee Bureau of Investigation
www.ticic.state.tn.us/SEXofndr/searchshort.asp
This registry contains the names of more than 400 people
convicted of felony sexual offenses on or after July 1, 1997.
The information includes name, address, photographs and
other information on each offender. The database is
searchable by last name, county of residence or ZIP code.
Information concerning these offenders can be found on
this website or by calling 1-888-837-4170 from 8:00 A.M.
80
until 4:30 P.M. CST Monday through Friday, excluding

holidays.
TEXAS
Texas Department of Public Safety
records.txdps.state.tx.us/soSearch/default.cfm
The database can be searched by name and ZIP code.
There are also various options for sorting sex offenders listed
in the database.
The following cities/counties also provide a list of local sex
offenders.
Balch Springs Police Department,
www.bspd.com/sexlistingdefault.asp
Collin County Sheriff, www.co.collin.tx.us/sheriff/sex.jsp
Dallas Police Department, www.dallaspolice.net/
Denton County Sheriff,
sheriff.dentoncounty.com/main.asp?Dept=54&Link=515
Farmers Branch Police Department, www.ci.farmers-
branch.tx.us/police/sexoffend/index.htm
UTAH
Utah Department of Corrections www.udc.state.ut.us/asp-
bin/sexoffendersearchform.asp
Data on offenders include name and aliases, date of birth,
photograph and physical description, vehicle and crime
committed. Search this site by name or zip code.
VERMONT
Vermont Department of Public Safety
www.dps.state.vt.us/cjs/sregistry.htm
Vermont does not maintain an online sex offender registry
but does provide online access to registration requirements.
81
Apparently the public does not have access to this

information.
VIRGINIA
Virginia State Police sex-
offender.vsp.state.va.us/Static/Search.htm
The Virginia State Police maintains a database of more
than 6,300 convicted sex offenders who are living in the
state. The Web site can be searched by the offender's name,
street address, ZIP code, city or county. The information
provided includes a photograph and address of each offender.
WASHINGTON STATE
The state of Washington does not provide Internet access
to the names or other information about registered sex
offenders. The public can make inquiries about registered sex
offenders to Washington State Patrol. Typically, local law
enforcement authorities handle the dissemination of
information about registered sex offenders.
The following cities/counties provide online information on
local sex offenders.
Bellevue Police Department,
www.ci.bellevue.wa.us/page.asp?view=1249
Bellingham Police Department,
www.cob.org/police/source/htm/sexoffenderscurrentlevel3.ht
m
Clark County Sheriff's Office,
www.co.clark.wa.us/sheriff/inter/comminfo/sexoffender/sexof
fender.htm
Cowlitz County Sheriff's Office,
www.co.cowlitz.wa.us/sheriff/rso/default.htm
82
King County Sheriff,

www.co.cowlitz.wa.us/sheriff/rso/default.htm
Longview Police Department,
www.ci.longview.wa.us/police/Services/notification.htm
Okanogan County Sheriff,
okanogancounty.org/Sheriff/soffend.htm
Renton Police Department,
www.ci.renton.wa.us/police/sexlevl3.htm
WASHINGTON DC
Metropolitan Police Department
mpdc.dc.gov/serv/sor/impreminder.shtm
Search by name, city quadrant or district number. Data on
sex offender includes a photograph and home and work
address.
WEST VIRGINIA
West Virginia State Police www.wvstatepolice.com/sexoff/
This database contains more than 700 sex offenders. The
registry was created in 1993 and contains the name, date of
birth, physical characteristics and crime committed for each
offender. Users can search for sex offenders in Berkeley,
Cabell and Kanawha counties.
WISCONSIN
Wisconsin Department of Corrections
offender.doc.state.wi.us/public/
Search this data base by name or zip code. You can also
call (608)240-5830
Office hours 7:45-4:30 Mon-Fri for sex offender
information.
83
Madison Police Department also has it's own list of local

sex offenders, www.ci.madison.wi.us/police/sexoffend.html
WYOMING
Wyoming Attorney General
attorneygeneral.state.wy.us/dci/so/soregistration.html
The state Division of Criminal Investigation maintains a
database of high-risk sex offenders. The information includes
the name, address, a photograph, aliases, date and place of
birth and conviction and physical characteristics for each
offender.
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Kid Safe: How To Protect Your Family From Molesters and Kidnappers

by Joan Bramsch AUTHORamp; Pam Coronado

Copyright ©2002 by Joan Bramsch and Pam

First published in the United States of America,

NOTICE: This ebook is licensed to the original purchaser

This ebook is displayed using 100% recycled electrons.

[Back to Table of Contents]

Joan Bramsch, Biography

Mother of five, grandmother of seven, she is founder of the

Mom Of 5 Earns Scholarship

parents of young children, "TEACH ME, I'M YOURS: Success

Understand this: Intuition/instinct is not a gift for only a

Creator of the "Smart Hearts" Program For Children

Pam Coronado is the mother of three school-aged children,

The world in which our children are growing today is not

from harm. Yes, the world wasn't as safe a place as it used to

girlfriend wore pink satin panties. He smiled at me fondly

Fortunately for us, nothing happened but it sure did open

In order to protect children from predators, I realized that

excitement of trying not to get caught. The predators I

Child molesters have an obsessive desire to be around

I know it's difficult to mistrust people who seem so nice

to get your child alone. A healthy male will realize the

Dear Empowered Parent,

I sincerely hope you find this information helpful. It can

These rules are very useful. Forward them to friends. The

1. Never get too close to a stranger. Molesters use all sorts

"No, I'm just a little kid. Ask a grown up to help you."

a. Teach your child how to KICK OUT CAR STOP LIGHTS

a. Flash room lights in an S-O-S signal b. Clog the toilet

f. If you see an abduction, GET THE LICENSE NUMBER,

Recognizing & Avoiding "Stranger Danger"

Smart Hearts reminds children that their feelings should

touch them where their swimsuit covers and that no one is

+ If you wouldn't leave your purse in the shopping cart

sitter kidnapping an infant and disappearing out of the

—Know the whereabouts of your child.

We all know that what children do in school is very

The second Look can save your Life!

A lesson for Parents and their Children

dangerous strangers. In fact, from now on, I'm not going to

heart telling you to be careful. Kind of like your own built in

home or to school or a friend's house as fast as you can. They

What's so bad about going to their car? Remember that a

What's a password? You know how computers have

What if someone jumps out of a bush or something and

If that doesn't work, stomp on top of his foot as hard as

If you come to a stop light with a car in front of you, jump

Remember, kids, your job is to make your kidnapper

As a private investigator who specializes in child

Truth: Though this has been the common approach to the

The most common kidnapping scenario happens right in

Nine-year-old Chris Cady was sitting on the bench waiting

ByAngel213: No I play second base. I got to go. My

Maybe if she had brothers and sisters, her parents wouldn't

Shannon moved cautiously to a chair across from the man.

The wrong people trick you into giving out information a

As I sat across from the petite woman who seemed to be

(beware of psychics who approach you or want to charge you

We all realize the complexity of our society's ills, but many

Society is caught in a vicious cycle that must be broken.

6 Report abuse that you know is occurring. That child has