Metro 28

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An academic 'was made to feel like
a fare dodger` after he was charged
155 for stepping off a train one stop
early. Prof Martyn Evans breached his
ticket`s rules by breaking his journey,
East Coast Mainline said go
WwS 155 bill for
leaving train early
A millionaire died when he plunged
off a cliff while riding a Segway.
Jimi Heselden, one of the country`s
biggest charity donors, was using the
two-wheeled scooter near his estate
when he fell into a river g11
WwS 5egway boss
dies in clih plunge
Injured Frank Lampard will miss
Chelsea`s Champions League clash
with Marseille tonight, while
crocked Wayne Rooney been ruled
out of Manchester United`s trip to
Valencia tomorrow g5o
SoR1 Lamps and
Roo to miss games
Charlotte Church says she asked her
ex, Gavin Henson, if it would be OK
to date her new lover. The singer
(above) insisted her relationship with
musician Johnny Powell did not start
before their split g32-33
SBowBl2 church's
date 'permission'
. o
oBofo
THOUSANDS of internet customers
have had their personal details leaked
online alongside a list of pornographic
flms they are alleged to have down-
loaded and shared.
The full names and addresses of at
least 4,000 Sky broadband customers,
all accused of illegal fre-sharing,
were among those published.
About 1,000 confdential e-mails
were also leaked in what one expert
called one of the worst breaches of
the Data Protection Act he had ever
seen. They were uploaded to popular
fle-sharing website The Pirate Bay
and seen by hundreds of users.
Privacy campaigner Alexander Hanff
said: 'This is likely to result in signif-
icant harm to tens of thousands of
people in the form of fraud, identity
theft and severe emotional distress.
'This frmcollected this information
Hayden 5mith
by spying on internet users and now
it has placed thousands of innocent
people at risk.`
The information was held by ACS:
Law which, the leaks showed, made
more than 630,000 from sending
letters to alleged net pirates asking
them to pay compensation of hun-
dreds of pounds or face court.
The documents made their way
online after users of the message-
board 4chan attacked ACS:Law`s site
in retaliation for its anti-piracy
efforts. One message was said to have
contained the personal information of
about 10,000 people and some credit
card details were included.
E-mails in which Andrew Crossley,
who runs ACS:Law, discusses buying
a Ferrari were also published.
Yesterday, he said: 'We were the
subject of a criminal attack to our sys-
tems. The business has and remains
intact and is continuing to trade.`
M|rror |mage:
V|s|tors adm|re
the|r reect|ons |n
An|sh Kapoor's
sta|n|ess stee|
scu|pture
C-Curve at h|s new
exh|b|t|on, Turn|ng
The Wor|d Ups|de
Down. Four of the
Br|t|sh art|st's
curved m|rror
works have been
p|aced at
Kens|ngton
Gardens for s|x
months. One,
ca||ed Sky M|rror,
measures 10m
(32ft| w|de. 'The
reect|on w|||
change every day
w|th the seasons,'
sa|d exh|b|t|on
manager Stephan|e
D|eckvoss P|oture: Getty
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Ooh, |oafers too: Corey Pav|n |eads out h|s teamyesterday P|otures: Getty/PA/Reuters/Sportsphoto
Abit of 0are
at the Ryder
cup( )
THE outfts were meant to evoke
the look of university professors
- but 1970s geography teachers
might be nearer the mark.
The USRyder Cupteamemerged
from their plane at Cardiff airport
yesterday to show off oversized,
boxy blazers paired with bizarre,
fared trousers.
Five of them wearing shades on
the overcast day did not add much
to the 'cool` factor.
Marty Hackel, a veteran US golf
fashion writer, said: 'What`s the
disco deal with those fared bot-
toms? It`s very John Tra-
volta. I don`t think
he had anything to do with select-
ing the team`s outfts but he could
have worn them.`
He was equally scathing of the
navyblue blazer, tie andgreytrous-
ers European captain Colin Mont-
gomerie wore to greet his US
counterpart, Corey Pavin.
'He looked like he`s selling
Pavin insurance,` he said.
The US outft, created by Pavin`s
wife Lisa, was meant to have a
'retro-inspired, vintage look`. At
least it is a marginal improvement
on the horrors the US golfers have
worn before.
Four years ago they few to
Dublin dressed in tweed jackets,
trousers and Fair Isle tank tops in
varying shades of brown.
Celebrity stylist Ceril Campbell
said the outft looked like 'some-
thing that`s been taken out of the
attic, complete with mothballs`.
In 1999, they sported shirts Tiger
Woods later confessed to burning
because they were 'so ugly`.
Fred Attewill
St|tch-up: T|ger Woods |n 1999 w|th h|s 'ug|y' sh|rt and the US tweed team of 2006 arr|ve |n Dub||n
Where? Well, oh the
trousers at least...
Old Bailey heard. Judge Peter
Rook placed her under a two-
year supervision order on
condition she is treated.
Breastfeedihg
mother 'e|ected'
A YOUNG mother c|a|ms she
was forced to |eave a
Pr|mark store for
breastfeed|ng her ch||d.
Fur|ous A|mee Edwards, 24,
was w|th son George when
she was to|d to cover up by a
member of staff at the shop
|n Swansea. 'I thought she
was jok|ng at rst as I have
never had a prob|em |n any
other shop before,' sa|d the
mother of four, from
Br|dgend, south Wa|es. A
spokesman for the d|scount
c|oth|ng group was
unava||ab|e for comment.
Mother 'twice
tried to kill son'
A MOTHER and her fve-year-
old son were saved after she
jumped in front of a train, a
court heard. They escaped
injury at Watford Junction but
15 minutes later the 45-year-old
crashed her car and her son
broke both arms in the
Modern scr|pts: A co||ect|on of 12th-century Greek gospe|s on
d|sp|ay at the Br|t|sh L|brary where more than a quarter of |ts
Greek manuscr|pts have been put on||ne for the rst t|me P|oture: AP
1op pupils could
miss uhiversity
BRIGHT pup||s cou|d m|ss out
on un|vers|ty p|aces next year
|f they get anyth|ng |ess than
an A grade at A-|eve|, pr|vate
headteachers fear. Students
seek|ng the most compet|t|ve
course p|aces were most at
r|sk, sa|d Andrew Grant, of the
Headmasters' and
Headm|stresses' Conference.
'It's been very hard on the h|gh
yers who just undershot,'
sa|d T|m Hands, master of
Magda|en Co||ege |n Oxford.
About 685,000 peop|e app||ed
to un| but on|y 474,746 got |n.
Bf nally.
A RARE lemur is on the run
from a zoo - just like the
animals in the animated flm
Madagascar. One-year-old
Kirioka escaped from Drusillas
Zoo Park in Alfriston, East
Sussex, last Wednesday. His
keepers believe the red-bellied
lemur is sheltering in nearby
abandoned birds' nests.
incidents in July last year. The
mother, who faced two charges
of attempted murder, suffered
from paranoid psychosis, the
TWO social
workers
claiming they
were unfairly
sacked over
the death of
Baby P in 2007
missed signs of abuse, a
tribunal heard yesterday. Maria
Ward and Gillian Christou
allegedly made 'serious errors
of judgment' over Peter
Connelly (picturedj while working
for Haringey Council, north
London. The hearing continues.
Baby eter duo
'missed abuse'
THE creator of
hit children's
show ln The
Night Garden
has called time
on the surreal
world of
lgglepiggle, Upsy Daisy and
Makka Pakka. Andrew
Davenport (picturedj said there
would not be a new series of
the hit BBC show but Beeb
bosses consoled fans by saying
it was developing new shows
involving the characters.
No more time
in Night 0arden
Bank's call to
raid savings
is 'dangerous'
SAVERS were yesterday urged by the
Bank of England to 'eat into` their nest
eggs to aid the economic recovery - in a
call labelled 'dangerous` by critics.
Interest rates have been slashed to a
historic low of 0.5 per cent to persuade
people to spend, not save, said the Bank`s
deputy governor Charlie Bean.
'I think it needs to be said that savers
shouldn`t necessarily expect to be able
to live just off their income in times
when interest rates are low,` he told
Channel 4.
'It may make sense for them to eat
into their capital a bit.`
Savers, often elderly, had been hit by
the economic crisis, said Mr Bean, who
'fully sympathised` but added: 'Very
often, older households have actually
benefted from the fact they`ve seen
capital gains on their houses.`
Brian Johnson, of chartered accountant
HW Fisher & Company, said the public
would be baffed by such 'mixed mes-
sages` from authorities, adding: 'On the
one hand, we have the government say-
ing our country needs to massively cut
its debt - and as soon as possible. On
the other, we have the Bank of England
telling us to spend, spend, spend.`
Mr Johnson said 'openly encouraging
the public to spend in such an uncertain
climate` was a 'dangerous strategy that
may well backfre`.
The Save Our Savers pressure group
says 22million savers are losing about
30billion in interest each year com-
pared with before the crisis.
Meanwhile, an International Monetary
Fund report yesterday said Britain`s
economic recovery was 'under way`.
It backed the government`s austerity
measures, calling chancellor George
Osborne`s plans 'credible`.
The report predicted economic growth
of two per cent next year.
Fred Attewill
Rio warhs agaihst
police budget cuts
FOOTBALLER Rio Ferdinand
claims spending cuts to police forces
could make children and adults
scared to walk the streets. The
Manchester United and
England defender, whose
friend`s 18-year-old
brother Rio McFarlane
was shot dead in London
earlier this month, warned
cuts could have a 'massive
impact` in places like
Peckham, south-east
London, and Moss Side,
Manchester. 'If kids don`t
see policemen, or if adults
don`t see policemen, they don`t feel
safe,` he told ITV1`s London
Tonight. 'If they`re going to start
taking these things away, making
cuts on these things one
by one, we could turn into
countries we`ve looked at
in the past and looked
down our noses at.
Hopefully it`s not going to
be a downward spiral.`
Ferdinand had played
football for West Ham`s
youth team with Mr
McFarlane`s brother
Anthony. Scared: Ferd|nand
9mokers told to clock
out when they light up
A GROWING number of Town Hall
smokers are being forced to clock in
and out for cigarette breaks.
It was revealed yesterday that a
Norfolk council hopes to follow in
the footsteps of Gateshead and North
Devon in getting fexi-time workers
to log the time they spend puffng.
Smokers at Breckland Council
would be expected to make up any
lost hours in their own time to make
sure they do the same amount of work
as their colleagues, bosses said.
However, the new rule has attracted
criticism from pro-smoking lobby
group Forest, which branded it the
'tyranny of the majority`.
William Nunn, Conservative leader
of Breckland Council, denied the pol-
icy had been introduced to make
money.
'It came about because the staff
themselves felt there was an issue of
fairness going on where some people
went out for a smoke and some didn`t.
'We want to make sure there is par-
ity among all the staff. This will apply
to everybody in the whole authority
and will ensure there is some form of
consistency.
'This is actually a case where we are
taking a very pragmatic view and en-
hancing the lives of our staff.`
The new policy will affect all 280
staff at the council, which has offces
in Swaffham, Dereham, Thetford, At-
tleborough and Watton.
The issue is up for discussion at a
council meeting tomorrow and the
ruling could come into force on No-
vember 1 if it is approved.
Simon Clark, director of Forest, said
the council was trying to embarrass
people into giving up. He said: 'It`s
completely unfair and prejudicial to
pick on smokers and imply that they
are slackers or take too many breaks.
'There are a lot of non-smokers tak-
ing long coffee breaks, browsing non-
work internet sites and taking personal
calls, so I don`t see why smokers
should be picked on.`
Fred Attewill
Soap star: Coronat|on Street's Ho||y Qu|n-Ankrah P|otures: AP/PA
EastEhders
tops Corrie
EASTENDERS was streets ahead of its
rivals at last night`s Inside Soap awards,
taking six prizes. The BBC1 show`s haul
included best soap, while ITV rival
Coronation Street landed four awards,
including best stunt for the Underworld
factory siege scene. Australian import
Neighbours beat Home And Away and
Doctors to be named best daytime show at
the event in north London. 'It`s wonderful
to be able to reward the amazing work
we`ve seen this year,` said Inside Soap
editor Stephen Murphy.
Good day: Sam C|ark w|th
the award for Ne|ghbours
Lawyer's
guh opeh
as he fell
ARMED siege
barrister Mark
Saunders opened
his shotgun into a
non-hring position
as he was killed
by police bullets,
an inquest heard yesterday.
Firearms expert Robert Grifhths
examined the 32-year-old`s
shotgun and footage of his death
at the hands of Met Police
ofhcers on May 6, 2008. He
concluded Mr Saunders opened
the gun after he was hit by the
hrst of hve bullets hred by
ofhcers surrounding his Chelsea
home. Westminster coroner`s
court heard it was impossible to
say if his action was intentional.
The inquest continues.
Soldier
killed ih
Helmahd
ANARMY
engineer working
with special forces
inAfghanistan has
been killed by a
Taliban roadside
bomb. Corporal
MatthewThomas,
of the Royal Electrical and
Mechanical Engineers, died
when the vehicle he was driving
was hit by an explosive device in
Helmand province on Saturday.
Cpl Thomas (pictured) was
attached to the Special Forces
Support Group. ARoyal
Electrical and Mechanical
Engineers spokesman said he
was a 'talented, rounded and
inspirational man`.
L199 ne for
leaving train
1 stop early
AN ACADEMIC says he was fned
155 for stepping off the train one
stop too early.
Martyn Evans got off the East Coast
Mainline service at Darlington, near
his home, rather than stay on to Dur-
ham where he works.
But the train operator, East Coast,
said he breached the terms of his frst
class ticket by 'breaking his journey`.
Although it later waived the excess
fare charge, Prof Evans, a professor of
humanities in medicine, said he did
not want to be called a fare-dodger.
'I resent that very much,`
added the father of two.
Prof Evans used three
frst-class tickets booked
by the university to cover a
trip from Durham to Lon-
don, London to Birming-
ham, then Birmingham to
Durham.
As he lives in Hurworth,
near Darlington, he got off
at Darlington but his ticket
would not let him pass
through the automatic barriers. When
he spoke to an offcial, she told him to
pay 155 - the cost of a frst-class tick-
et from Birmingham to Darlington.
Prof Evans spoke to her supervisor
but they were also adamant that he
had travelled without a valid ticket.
He eventually persuaded the em-
ployee to allow him to leave if he
signed an invoice for the 155.
'It`s madness,` the professor said.
An East Coast spokesman said: 'The
terms and conditions of
the advance purchase frst-
class ticket, which Prof
Evans had used, clearly
state that breaking a jour-
ney en route, or starting
from an intermediate sta-
tion, is not permitted.
'We accept this was a
genuine mistake on his be-
half and have cancelled
the excess fare as a gesture
of goodwill.`
Fred Attewill
Angry: Prof Evans
Bumper resu|t: Bang goes test dummy Bob after the XC60's 'advanced pedestr|an avo|dance system' fa||ed
Crunch: A co|||s|on warn|ng system fa||ed too
Volvo: 1he crash
test dummies...
VOLVO had to go into damage limitation after a show of its
'accident avoidance technology` went badly wrong. Crash
test dummy Bob took a big hit after the XC60`s radar and
camera system failed to notice him and automatically brake
in three out of 12 runs. The spectacular results ~ which played
out in front of journalists ~ are a YouTube hit. It comes just
months after another trial in which an S60 rear-ended a
stationary lorry it was supposed to automatically avoid.
Centre stage: Dav|d M|||band, |eft, d|scusses matters w|th Doug|as A|exander and Bob A|nsworth at the Labour Party conference P|otures: E|||ott Franks/Getty
NEW Labour leader Ed Miliband
was expected today to twist the
knife into Gordon Brown`s reign.
Mr Miliband was to use his frst
major speech to tell voters he
understood their anger at Labour
for failing to prevent a return to the
'boom and bust` years.
In a direct reference to Mr Brown`s
famous pledge about stability, Mr
Miliband will say: 'When you saw
the worst fnancial crisis in a
generation, I understand your an-
ger that Labour hadn`t stood up to
the old ways in the City which said
deregulation was the answer.
'When you wanted to make it
possible for your kids to get on in
life, I understand why you felt that
we were stuck in old thinking about
higher and higher levels of person-
al debt, including tuition fees.
'And when you saw jobs disap-
pear and economic security under-
3ohn Higginson olitical
Editor, in Manchester
SHADOW home secretary
Alan Johnson will today claim
Labour is the 'party of law and
order` during his speech to
delegates in Manchester. In an
exclusive interview with Metro,
he criticised what he branded a
'triple whammy` of changes
imposed on police by the
coalition which is making their
job harder. Police budgets face
being cut by 25 per cent, forces
are being reshaped and the use
of CCTV and DNA prohling
will be curtailed, he warned.
'We were the only government
to bring down crime, while
under the last Conservative
government it almost doubled,`
he said. 'The Tories are to law
and order what Pavarotti is to
hang-gliding.` Meanwhile,
shadow culture secretary Ben
Bradshaw told Metro that New
Labour was not dead. 'It is
nonsense to suggest we will
abandon the policies and ideas
that helped us win three
successive general elections,`
he insisted.
1ohhsoh: Labour
the party of law
Sp|n doctor: A|an Johnson on the
decks dur|ng a v|s|t to an arts
centre |n Manchester P|oture: PA
Ed sticks the knife in
'I uhderstahd your ahger' says Milibahd, as he turhs focus oh Browh
'A new generat|on
|s |ead|ng th|s party'
mined, I understand your anger at a
Labour government that claimed it
could end boom and bust.`
As chancellor when Labour swept
to power in 1997, Mr Brown said
he wanted to be in the government
'that ended Tory boom and bust
forever`.
It was a phrase he repeated often
as prime minister.
Mr Miliband, who narrowly de-
feated his brother, David, in the
leadership race, also claims a 'new
generation is now leading Labour`.
He will strike a tone of humility
about how Labour came to lose
trust. 'Too often we brought old,
established ways of thinking and
sometimes we even became the
establishment,` he will say.
The speech will be his frst test at
convincing the party faithful - and
voters - he is the right man for the
job. His crestfallen brother yester-
day put his own disappointment
aside to issue a rallying call to get
behind his 'special` sibling.
'Those of you who have been
coming up to me in the last few
days - don`t worry, I`ll be fne,` he
told a packed conference hall.
The elder Miliband has yet to
make it known publicly whether he
will serve under his brother in the
shadow cabinet.
He has until 5pm tomorrow to put
himself forward for a senior role.
Diane Abbott, the frst faller in
the leadership race, said there was
'absolutely no doubt` Mr Miliband
would serve.
Brother|y |ove: Dav|d s|aps
'spec|a|' Ed on the back
Flash technology
Users will be able to
use the device's
touch sensitive
preview screen to
identify dimly lit areas
The camera incorporates
a scene condition sensor
to evaluate image
information with the
user's lighting directions
Once this information
is processed it directs
a number of the many
lights to the areas
selected
The desired effect is a
better image with
more even lighting
Apple on to
0ashy little
number...
3B 3B
Astoh Martih is coolest brahd
ASTON MARTIN has been named
the coolest brand in Britain ~ again.
The sports car manufacturer came
top in the CoolBrands survey for the
fourth time in hve years, beating the
iPhone into second place. Vivienne
Westwood topped the list of fashion
brands ahead of Chanel, while the
BBC`s iPlayer was named coolest
website. Thousands of brands were
judged by an expert council and
more than 2,000 shoppers.
APPLE is working on the next wave
of digital camera technology.
The US technology giant has fled
patent applications for an advanced
fash re-direction system, it emerged
this week.
This would allow users to focus the
fash on specifc areas in the same
way autofocus works on the iPhone 4,
which allows you to touch the screen
in certain areas. The patent states the
system could be integrated into a vari-
ety of Apple products, from its com-
puters to devices based on its iOS op-
erating system, and even a stand-alone
Apple camera. According to the blog
Patently Apple, the technology in-
volves the camera fash being passed
through a 'redirector` so it does not
need to be directly in the centre when
a photo is taken. An 'evaluator` also
considers how much light needs to be
added to the picture and adjusts the
fash brightness accordingly. AnApple
spokeswoman said the company did
not comment on patent applications.
arty fall pupil 'led
to roof by teacher'
A PUPIL who seriously injured
himself when he fell through a skylight
at school was led up there by the head
teacher during a party, a court heard
yesterday. Joel Murray said
he had drunk three or four
beers with fellow sixth-
formers at the school bash
before falling 2.5m (8ft) into
a corridor, fracturing his
skull, breaking ribs and
suffered permanent damage
to his eye, it was claimed.
He was with a group of ten
to 12 students at Sacred
Heart Catholic College in Crosby,
Merseyside, who were taken to the roof
by John Summerfeld during a party to
celebrate A-level results in 2008,
Liverpool crown court
heard. 'Nobody was drunk
but it is possible they were
slightly affected by drink,
possibly slightly
inebriated,` said prosecutor
Kevin Donnelly.
Summerfeld, 65, denies
failing to take reasonable
care of his students. The
trial continues.
Ex-boyfriend 'murdered
teenager over break-up'
Aidan Radnedge
A TEENAGER was murdered in an
'exceptionally vicious attack` by her
jilted former boyfriend, a court was
told yesterday.
Asha Muneer was repeatedly stabbed
by Gulamyr Akhter because he 'could
not tolerate her rejection of him`,
prosecutors claimed.
The pair were in a relationship but
it ended several months before Miss
Muneer died and she had started seeing
someone else, the jury was told. Miss
Muneer was stabbed in her head, face
and neck as she walked to her Reading
home after fnishing work at a shop.
The 18-year-old`s body was found in
a fooded underpass two hours later.
'She had been the victim of an
exceptionally vicious attack by some-
one with a knife,` said prosecutor John
Price QC.
What was thought to be the weapon
was found nearby. Its blade was bent
and its handle broken, possibly by the
force of the impact.
'Whoever was responsible for
attacking this young woman must
have intended to kill her, to end her
life,` said Mr Price. 'This was a delib-
erate murder.`
Miss Muneer`s journey home after
work in January was captured on
CCTV, which was shown to the jury
at Reading crown court. At one point,
the A-level student was joined by a
man in a hooded top carrying a ruck-
sack, the footage showed.
She was last seen walking towards
the underpass, still with the man, who
was later flmed walking in the other
direction on his own.
The man then stopped and wiped
his hands in snow piled at the side of
the road.
Akhter, 19, of Reading, denies mur-
der. The trial continues.
'V|c|ous
attack':
Asha
Muneer
was
stabbed
|n her
head,
face and
neck
P|oture: lNS
Mother is found
dead in 'shooting'
g
A MOTHER was found dead at
her home yesterday in a
suspected shooting. A man
suffering 'serious injuries` was
also found at the house and is
recovering in hospital. The
woman was named locally as
Amanda Sorrell, a divorcee who
worked for Cornwall County
Council. Police were called to
her home in Stoke Climsland,
near Callington, after she did
not turn up to work. Neighbour
Terrence Shead said he heard a
bang 'like a door slamming`
early on Saturday and again on
Monday. Police are treating the
death as 'unexplained`.
Hurt: Joe| Murray
P
|o
t
u
r
e
:
P
A
:60
second
interview
You work w|th a mass|ve
team of songwr|ters, |yr|c|sts,
mus|c|ans and voca||sts - what
do you actua||y do? I`m producing
every song on the new album.
On a couple of songs I`m singing
and I`m playing the guitar or keys
on every song. There`s certain songs
where I wrote all the music and
Jonathan (Pierce, of The Drums) just
wrote the lyrics. Then there`s a song
like Somebody To Love Me - the
track with Boy George and Miike
Snow - which has Cathy Dennis,
Jake Shears from the Scissor Sisters
and a cast of thousands, just because
the song went through so many
different forms with people
contributing over time. It wasn`t like
a giant table where we were all
songwriting by committee.
Are you any good at s|ng|ng?
I`m probably a six-and-a-half. But
working with vocalists such as Daniel
O
O
Dave, a 28-year-old rock star, still
riding his bike everywhere,` which
I think is really cool.
You must get bombarded w|th
requests from peop|e want|ng to
work w|th you? You would think
that, but no. It`s not like I have a
free day during the year anyway.
I`ve got my plate flled working with
artists I love, whether they`re relative
unknowns, such as The Rumble
Strips and Wiley, or Duran Duran.
On top of that, I`m juggling my own
process of making albums and
touring. I wouldn`t be able to ft
another record in there if I wanted to.
W||| you den|te|y be produc|ng
Amy W|nehouse's next a|bum?
I`m not sure. Whenever I`m
producing a record with Amy or
whoever, it`s always about the songs,
so you have to hear the songs before
O
O
Merriweather, Adele and Amy
Winehouse, it`s not like you`re sitting
in the studio thinking 'I could do that`.
You know that`s a God-given gift.
Boy George and S|mon |e Bon
make guest appearances. Are
you nosta|g|c about the 80s?
Duran Duran were the frst band
I remember being a real fan of.
I had an Arena [Duran Duran album]
lunch box and a Smash Hits sticker
book. I`ve been working on their new
album, which will probably be out
later this year - it`s the best stuff that
they`ve done in maybe 25 years.
They`re writing great songs; they
sound like they care.
Your new s|ng|e |s The B|ke
Song. Are you an av|d cyc||st?
I do like to bicycle around. In New
York I use my bike a lot. That song
was written by Dave McCabe, from
The Zutons. Dave wrote Valerie,
which was the biggest hit off my last
record. He was sitting on a couch in
a studio in Brooklyn, singing this
really carefree playful hook: 'I want
to ride my bike until I get home.`
He rides his bike everywhere in
Liverpool. You just go: 'There`s
O
O
you decide what you`re going to do.
Obviously there`s a chemistry in the
record that we made together. I hope
if we did something together again it
would be as good.
How b|g |s your record
co||ect|on? I can`t remember
any more. I DJ using Serato,
a programme that lets you use your
computer and I don`t have to bring
my vinyl with me. I have probably
between 5,000 and 6,000 records.
It used to be around 10,000.
If I can`t pull it off the shelf and
remember where I bought it and
why, then I know it can probably
be chucked out.
What's the best party you've
ever DJed at? Defnitely not some
famous person`s do. The best ones
are always in some amazing club
you`ve never been to and some crowd
where you don`t know what to
expect. World Headquarters in
Newcastle and also YoYo at the
Notting Hill Arts Club in London,
there`s a few places like that where
it`s always magic.
/a|| |onson's new a|o0m, |eco|o
Co||ec||on, |s o0| now.
O
O
'Duran Duran were the hrst band l
remember being a fan of. l had an Arena
Iunch box and a 5mash Hits sticker book'
!B
0
D1, producer and musician Hark
Ronson, 35, has worked with Amy
winehouse, LiIy AIIen and Lhristina
AguiIera. his new aIbum, Record
LoIIection, features q1ip, 8oy 6eorge,
6hostface kiIIah, wiIey and Duran
Duran's Simon Le 8on
oo R Boo oo
o\fPo\
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The ureen Room
8, Neil Sean
CeIebrities behind cIosed doors
Madonna revea|s her greatest
aoh|evement |s be|ng a good mother. 'l
|ove |t and |t's not easy but then everyone
knows l adore a oha||enge,' she sa|d.
Texter Vernon Kay says he and w|fe
Tess Da|y have started go|ng out on
'dates' together. 'It's the best, |t's ||ke
start|ng out a|| over aga|n,' he sa|d.
Dann|| M|nogue's te||-a|| memo|r |sn't even
out yet and she's a|ready negot|at|ng ha|f-
pr|oe reta|| dea|s. How |ong before she
s|gns up w|th Pound|and?
P|neapp|e Stud|os' Lou|e Spence |s
moan|ng about h|s fa||ure as a chat
show host w|th ITV. 'I d|d a p||ot w|th
Emma Bunton but |t's fa||ed,' he sa|d.
Ann W|ddeoombe |s not far|ng we|| on
Str|ot|y l oan revea|. W||| she do a Susan
Boy|e and have a me|tdown before the
danoe show goes ||ve? Watoh th|s spaoe.
Meanwh||e, her partner Anton Du
Beke |s |n a b|ack mood after fa|||ng
an aud|t|on for the mus|ca| Ch|cago.
Don't te|| Jason Manford but h|s showb|z
pa| Frank Sk|nner was offered The One
Show job before he was.
For more ceIebrity gossip, just cIick on www.metro.co.ukJshowbiz
Tr|butes:
F|owers are
|eft near
the r|ver
where J|m|
Hese|den
d|ed wh||e
r|d|ng a
Segway
P|oture: PA
Millionaire
dies falling
oh clih on
his 9egway
THE millionaire owner of Segway died
when he plunged off a cliff while riding
one of the two-wheeled scooters, it
emerged yesterday.
Jimi Heselden was driving a cross-
country version of the electric machine
before apparently losing control and
landing in a river, it is believed.
The tycoon, who had a reported fortune
of 160million, died at the scene near his
estate and a Segway was discovered in
the water.
A spokesman for the 62-
year-old`s family said: 'We
have been left devastated
by the sudden and tragic
loss of a much-loved father
and husband.
'There is absolutely noth-
ing to suggest it was any-
thing other than a tragic
accident. The exact cir-
cumstances of the accident
are still being clarifed and
will, of course, be the sub-
ject of an inquest.
'We would once again
like to thank Jimi`s many
friends and colleagues for
their help and condolences at this very
distressing time for the family.`
Mr Heselden was riding the Segway
on rough terrain when he fell 9m (30ft)
into the River Wharfe in Boston Spa to
the north-east of Leeds on Sunday.
A former miner who left school at 15,
he made his fortune after his Leeds-
based defence company Hesco Bastion
developed 'blast walls` to
protect British soldiers.
He led a British team
which bought US-based
Segway last year.
The company, which
makes and distributes the
distinctive scooters used by
celebrities including teen-
age pop star Justin Bieber,
was founded in 1999.
Mr Heselden donated at
least 23million to charities
including Help For Heroes
and was made an OBE in
2006. Police said the death
was not being treated as
suspicious.
Hayden 5mith
Popu|ar: A Segway
Stores' 700mboost from
mihimum alcohol prices
SUPERMARKET chains would
pocket a 700million windfall if
minimum pricing for alcohol was
introduced, new research suggests.
Tesco, Britain`s biggest supermarket
chain, stands to reap the most
rewards, according to the Institute
for Fiscal Studies. The think-tank
looked at the effect of a 45p
minimum unit price for alcohol and
said it would beneht retailers instead
of the public purse.
The stores which sell the most
alcohol ~ Tesco, Asda and
Sainsbury`s ~ stand to gain the most
from the measure, while discount
chains like Lidl and Aldi would also
beneht, the institute said. It prefers
higher taxation which would raise
more money for the government.
Charity spreads smiles across Sierra Leohe
Child are former child soldiers and
almost all of the girls have been
forced to work as prostitutes.
Volunteers from the charity talk to
homeless children and invite them
to come to their nearest centre,
building their trust before the proc-
ess of getting them back with their
families begins. Once reunited,
Street Child gives each family a 50
grant to invest in their business, al-
lowing them to pay for their child`s
education. To date Street Child has
reunited about 500 children with
their families and helped themback
into education or vocational train-
ing. It also paid school fees for
another 500 who were on the verge
of being homeless, giving a grant
to their families too.
Because Street Child is run by
volunteers, 90p out of every pound
donated to the charity goes directly
to helping children in Sierra Leone.
A happy future: Streetch||d |s work|ng hard to offer youngsters |n S|erra Leone a better ||fe
Bringing hope
to the streets
A BRITISH charity is helping hun-
dreds of children in Sierra Leone
off the streets and into school.
Street Child of Sierra Leone, set
up two years ago, is creating better
lives for children in one of the
poorest countries in the world.
It now has three centres where
children, many of whom were
forced into being child soldiers or
sex workers, can be reunited with
their families and put on the road
back into education.
The charity was established by its
director, Tom Dannatt - son of Gen
Sir Richard Dannatt, the former
head of the Army.
He went to Sierra Leone and was
shocked by the poverty and large
numbers of children who were
sleeping rough.
The 31-year-old Londoner said:
'The number of children in the street
in Sierra Leone is so prevalent, it
strikes you immediately.
'The base reason why these chil-
dren are on the street is poverty.
'We aim to give them a stake in
society again.`
Torn apart by more than a decade
of civil war which ended in 2002,
Sierra Leone is ranked 180th out of
182 nations on the Human Devel-
opment Index, which measures
living standards, national wealth
and education levels.
Many of the boys helped by Street
Ross Mcuuinness
L|fe |essons: Ch||dren at the char|ty's three centres are g|ven
food and teach|ng to prepare them to go back |nto educat|on
uo to www.street-child.co.uk for more information. The charity is trying to nd 500 people to each
raise 1,000 to help children in 5ierra Leone. For details visit www.makethiswhatyoudo.com
!fo RBf
}B\o Bo \B
THE husband of a supermodel has
been arrested over an allegation of
rape during London Fashion
Week.
Shawn Mount, whose wife Heidi
is the face of Chanel, was quizzed
by detectives following allegations
of an assault on a 24 year-old woman
at a central London hotel in the
early hours of Monday last week.
Mount, a hair stylist who has
worked for Vogue and on ad cam-
paigns for top designers including
Ralph Lauren, was styling hair for
the catwalk shows. The 30-year-
old was bailed without charge.
Mount`s wife was reportedly on
an assignment in Milan at the time
of the alleged incident. Scotland
Yard said the case was being held
by its Sapphire Unit, which spe-
cialises in investigating allegations
of sexual assault.
A force spokesman confrmed
they were investigating 'an allega-
tion of a serious sexual assault` in
the early hours of September 20 at
a central London hotel.
He said the alleged victim was
referred to a Haven Centre for sup-
port and added: 'A 30-year-old
man was arrested on September 21
on suspicion of rape. That man was
subsequently bailed to return to a
central London police station, com-
ing back on a date in November.`
The New York Post quoted a
source as saying that Mount denies
the allegation. He lives with his 23-
year-old wife and their son, Liam,
two, in NewYork.
Heidi has appeared on the cat-
walk for some of the biggest names
in fashion, including Marc Jacobs
and Alexander McQueen.
fB 0Bfofo
A||egat|on: Shawn Mount and
h|s supermode| w|fe He|d|
A wa|k on the w||d s|de: Mode|s present creat|ons by Roberto Cava||| |n a jung|e sett|ng P|oture: EPA
Br|ef: A DSquared
2
mode| |s
ready for the beach P|oture: Getty
Star spot: He|d| K|um at the
Cava||| show |n M||an P|oture: Getty
Cavalli's
uhtamed
collectioh
ROBERTO CAVALLI yesterday
lowered the curtain on Milan
Fashion Week by placing his
models in a make-believe jungle.
The self-styled king of the snakeskin
unveiled a sexy collection of tight
gowns dripping with fringes, skin-
tight trousers and reptilian shoulder
bags. The elaborate set was housed
within a glass tent behind the Arco
della Pace, a city landmark. Giorgio
Armani, the godfather of Italian
fashion, also unveiled his spring
collection yesterday along with
Dean and Dan Caten, the Canadian
twins behind the DSquared
2
label.
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L|tt|e ghter: Lex| Lacey ||es |n a sandw|ch bag short|y after be|ng born at 26 weeks P|oture: SWNS
400g baby saved
by sandwich bag
A BABY girl born three months
early survived after being kept
warmin a sandwich bag taken from
the hospital canteen.
Lexi Lacey weighed just 396g
(14oz) and her parents were warned
it was unlikely she would survive
the night.
She was so small, doctors had to
use the smallest insulating sleeping
bag they could fnd - a 15cm (6in)
sandwich bag from the canteen.
But Lexi defed the gloomy pred-
ictions and, 11 weeks on, is now
home with mother, Chelsea Row-
berry and father Lee Lacey, 24.
'The doctors told us they had
never known a baby born as prem-
aturely as Lexi survive,` said 17-
year-old Ms Rowberry.
'She was so tiny the only thing
they had to keep her body temperat-
ure warmwas a sandwich bag from
the hospital canteen - it`s incredi-
ble to think that saved her.
'People look quite shocked when
I tell themshe`s OK, a lot of people
didn`t like to speak to me at frst.`
Lexi now weighs in a healthy
2.44kg (5lb 6oz), although that is
still some way shy of the average
weight of a newborn.
'When they see her now, people
don`t believe me when I tell them
how premature she was,` said Ms
Rowberry, who lives with her par-
ents in Worcester. Dr Andrew Gal-
lagher, consultant paediatrician at
Worcestershire Royal Hospital,
said small babies are placed the
plastic bags for about 30min. 'It
acts as a little micro-environment
for them to be in before they are
later transferred to the neonatal
unit and placed in an incubator.`
Bfo 1
Cudd|es:
Che|sea
Rowberry
and Lee
Lacey
w|th the|r
daughter,
Lex|, who
beat the
odds to
surv|ve
Moat PC ih plea for public support
THE police ofhcer blinded by gunman Raoul
Moat has urged people to back emergency service
members injured by criminals. PC David
Rathband said it was 'time for the British public
to step up to the plate`. The Northumbria PC, 42,
was shot in the face as he sat in his patrol car in
July. He likened the shooting to having his 'head
inside a tin can with the biggest hrework you can
imagine` but said he doesn`t hold any malice. The
ofhcer hopes to raise 1million for the Blue Lamp
Foundation and has organised a blindfold walk
along the Northumberland coast on October 3.
Nine years for
kning friend
A PUBLIC schoolboy who stabbed
his best friend 13 times and left
him for dead was yesterday jailed
for nine years.
Teenager Harry Schick launched
the hour-long attack on Gavin
Doyle, 16, 'for his own personal
gratifcation`, said police.
Judge Richard Hawkins said the
stabbing was 'traumatic` for the vic-
tim, adding: 'What makes it worse
is that he considered you a friend.`
He ordered a psychological
assessment of Schick, 17, after
serving his sentence because it was
such an unusual attack.
'He is a strange character and I
think a very dangerous character,`
said Det Sgt Tim Hammond. Ben-
jamin Squirrell, defending, sug-
gested Schick had become 'dis-
tanced from reality`.
Even Schick`s mother said the
attack was 'tragic and incompre-
hensible`. The teenagers were both
A-level students at the 14,000-a-
year Pangbourne College in Berk-
shire, the Old Bailey heard.
Gavin hoped to become a Royal
Marine and paid Schick 400 to get
an air pistol for target practice.
The victim set up a meeting in
Croydon in March to get the weap-
on but, as he turned his back,
Schick struck with a large knife.
He took his victim`s mobile
phone and deleted records of their
contact before tossing it on to
Gavin`s chest where he lay.
The boy suffered a pierced liver
and collapsed lung but managed to
dial 999 on the phone.
Schick, of Earls Court, west Lon-
don, initially denied the attack but
pleaded guilty to attempted murder
last month before his trial.
fB 0Bfofo
'Strange':
Harry
Sch|ck
;o B
B B
}
WHEN the satnav in Robert
Ziegler`s van told him to follow the
road, he took it at its word. By the
time it said 'turn around`, his fate
was sealed. The 37-year-old was
stuck up a mountain footpath. 'I
kept hoping each little turn would
get me back to the main road,` he
said. 'In the end, it told me to turn
around but, of course, I couldn`t by
then.` A helicopter was called in to
carry the van and its driver to safety
off the peak in Bergn, Switzerland.
'He says he didn`t see any footpath
signs but he must be a fair driver to
get that far up a glorihed goat
track,` said a hre service spokesman.
Narrow escape: The van |s taken by he||copter off the mounta|n track where |t became stuck P|otures: OEN
cost of wind farms 'soaring'
OFFSHORE wind farms cost
twice as much to produce energy as
gas and coal-fred power stations, a
report warned yesterday. Costs of
building the sites at sea have
doubled in the past fve years
owing to rising steel prices and the
weak pound. Costs have risen for
all kinds of energy generation but
offshore wind farms remain the
most expensive - 90 per cent more
than fossil fuel and 50 per cent
more than nuclear, the report from
the UK Energy Research Centre
showed. While Britain produces as
much power offshore as the rest of
the world put together, it is likely
to be at least 20 years before wind
is on a par cost-wise with other
sources of power generation,
according to the report`s authors.
uood Taste Tuesday, September 28, 2010
M
M
M
M Editedby Andy Lynes goodtasteQukmetro.co.uk
uood Taste
`m a lazy chef,` claims Bill Granger

as he spoons yoghurt, cucumber
and mint raita on to a plate of
shallow-fried fshcakes. 'I`m
always trying to work out ways of
making things easier.` The laid-
back approach has won him a dedicated
following for his cafs in Sydney and
Tokyo (with London following soon),
serving up comfort food such as ricotta
hot cakes and wagyu beef burgers,
and a series of stylish cook books
that have sold more than 1.5million
copies worldwide.
It seems appropriate Granger is
demonstrating three recipes from his
latest volume, Bill`s Basics, exclusively
for Metro, in a Schiffni kitchen in the
achingly trendy DesignSpaceLondon, a
room that`s as minimalist as one of the
chef`s own recipes.
'If a recipe looks too long - even if it`s
simple stuff - you`re not going to use it,`
he says. 'I make sure recipes don`t
require too much technique; the favour
base and the method are enough to make
them work.` The fshcakes, made from
leftover mash and tinned salmon, are a
one-bowl, one-pan wonder. Bursting with
the Asian-infuenced favours that typify
much of Granger`s cooking, they taste
fantastic warm and crisp from the pan.
'The secret is having the right heat,` he
explains. 'You`re better off having it too
hot than too cold, so get the oil hotter
than you think you need it. If they start
to brown quickly you can always drop
the heat.` Granger uses a recently
purchased and expensive-looking
David Mellor knife to slice up some
pak choi for a chicken noodle soup,
but he`s just as happy with
the small, cheap-as-chips
serrated paring knife
that`s laying on the
worktop nearby.
'I did nine months in
London cooking
with that,
developing the
book. I much
prefer working in
the kitchen in London
where I`ve got two pots, a
chopping board and a couple
of stainless steel bowls, than
in Sydney where I`ve got every available
gadget that you just collect over the
years. It`s been so liberating.` He tears,
rather than slices, some leftover roasted
chicken breast and adds it to a bowl of
cooked noodles, green beans and the pak
choi. 'When you shred the chicken, what
you`re doing is getting all of that great
texture on the outside of the chicken and
Asian food is all about textures,` he says.
Granger is unapologetic in his use of
convenience ingredients and whips up a
highly favoured broth from ready-made
chicken stock, oyster sauce, lime and
sugar. 'If you really want to get organised
you can do these bowls ahead of time,
put them in the fridge and then you just
have to heat the stock up for the next
night`s dinner,` he says. 'What most
people struggle with, I know myself, is
coming home at six or seven o`clock and
thinking: 'I`ve got to make dinner, being
really uninspired and so you get a
takeaway or a ready meal. You want
something you can put together in fve
minutes.` There`s just time for one last
dish from the in-demand chef and it`s as
jaw-droppingly simple as it is delicious.
Granger puts some water in the bottom of
a three-tier metal steamer and puts it on
the heat. He arranges a bed of green veg
on a plate and tops it with a slice of red
snapper. He scatters over slices of ginger,
then pops it in the steamer. In the few
minutes it takes to cook, he
makes a chilli dressing with soy
and balsamic vinegar. ('It
approximates the favour of
Chinese black vinegar - who
has that in their cupboard?`)
There`s a defnite streak of
irreverence running through
Granger`s approach to
cooking but it`s all in
the name of
maximising favour
and minimising effort.
'Purists might look at
my recipes and say:
'God, they`re rubbish,
you don`t do it like
that! but it doesn`t
matter, as long as it
tastes nice.`
S|||'s Sas|cs (O0ao||||e |s
o0| now, o||ceo 25
6reat rub: when Australian chef 8ill 6ranger relocated to
London last year, he left behind a kitchen full of gadgets.
uuring a oneonone cookery lesson, he told ANbY LYNS
how getting back to basics inspired his new book
Basically,
beihg lazy
fts the Bill
Read me g
Quay by
Peter G||more
Ohef Peter G||more |s
the ant|-B||| Granger.
Awarded three hats |n
The Sydney Morn|ng
Hera|d Good Food Gu|de (the
Austra||an equ|va|ent of three
M|ohe||n stars} s|noe 2003, h|s Ouay
restaurant ho|ds the No.27 spot |n
the San Pe||egr|no Wor|d's 50 Best
Restaurants. We|gh|ng |n at 2kg, the
Ouay oookbook |s not the most
user-fr|end|y tome, w|th oomp|ex
reo|pes suoh as 's|ow-oooked qua||
breasts w|th truffe oustard, b|aok
pudd|ng, p|nk turn|ps and m||k sk|n',
but |t's an eye-open|ng read w|th
gorgeous photography that w||| have
you book|ng the next f|ght to Oz.
35, /0|ooc| Soo|s,
o0o||s|eo ô.emoe| 1.
O 150 years of
Tahb||k w|nes
Fam||y owned Tahb||k, one
of the o|dest w|ner|es |n
v|otor|a, notohed up 150
years of w|ne-mak|ng th|s
year. Jo|n the oe|ebrat|ons
by enjoy|ng a g|ass or two
at Austra||an ohef Brett
Graham's The |edbury restaurant
|n |ondon (www.the|edbury.oom}
or w|th a bott|e of |ts renowned
Marsanne at home. Wa|trose W|ne
D|reot says the 2007 v|ntage |s
'fresh, youthfu| and |ntense... fu|| of
peaoh and |emon fru|t favours
streaked w|th h|nts of honey. The
r|oh, oomp|ex fru|t oharaoters are
ba|anoed by a or|sp, refresh|ng fee|
and ||ght, fora| notes of honeysuok|e'.
9.19 oe| oo|||e.
www.wa|||osew|ne.com
O Tasman|an Pepper
Berr|es and Honey
V|negar
Tetsuya Wakuda |s the
b|g daddy of the Sydney
fne d|n|ng soene,
aoo|a|med the wor|d over
for h|s |ntr|oate tast|ng
menus. Now he's bott|ed a
||tt|e of h|s ou||nary mag|o |n the form
of a range of oond|ments that |no|ude
Season|ng R|oe v|negar, Nor| v|negar
and Honey Rosemary v|na|grette.
Wakuda suggests h|s Tasman|an
Pepper Berr|es and Honey v|negar
(p|otured} for both sweet and savoury
d|shes, |no|ud|ng mar|nated peaohes
and beetroot and orange sa|ad.
8.95 /o| 200m|. /.a||ao|e a|
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you ||ke}, 1tsp grated g|nger, 2tbsp
crme fra|che, 160g bread crumbs
and grated zest of one |emon and
season w|th sea sa|t and pepper.
M|x we|| and shape |nto 12 patt|es, then
dust w|th a ||tt|e p|a|n our.
3. Heat 6tbsp sunower o|| |n a fry|ng
pan over a med|um to h|gh heat. Fry the
fsh oakes |n batohes for two to three
m|nutes eaoh s|de unt|| go|den.
4. Serve w|th |emon wedges and a
ra|ta made w|th 250g yoghurt, one
Lebanese cucumber pee|ed, seeded
and fne|y ohopped and 1tbsp
chopped m|nt st|rred together and
seasoned w|th sea sa|t and ground
b|ack pepper.
5teamed sh with chilli
dressing
(serves 4}
1. Arrange one
pak cho|,
|eaves
separated, 100g
green beans,
topped and 100g
sugarsnap peas on a
|arge p|ate w|th four 200g rm wh|te
sh ||ets and put |nto a steamer for
fve to ten m|nutes unt|| the fsh |s
opaque and vegetab|es are br|ght green.
2. Wh|sk together 60m| soy sauce,
1tsp ba|sam|c v|negar, 3tsp caster
sugar, 1tsp sesame o||, one |ong
red ch||||, fne|y ohopped, three spr|ng
on|ons, fne|y s||oed on the d|agona|,
1tbsp ||me ju|ce, 1tbsp ||ght-
avoured o|| suoh as sunfower.
3. Serve the fsh and vegetab|es
|mmed|ate|y and pour the oh|||| dress|ng
over the top.
g
8iII's recies
Tuesday, September 28, 2010 uood Taste
For a diherent take on gastronomy, check out new 'food cuIture'
magazine Rotten AppIes that incIudes an articIe on death row dining
3.95 o|0s o8o /|om www.|o||enaoo|esma.com
chicken
noodle
soup
(serves 4}
1. D|v|de four
pak cho|,
shredded
orossways,
among four |arge
soup bow|s.
2. Put 250g fresh egg nood|es |n a
|arge, heatproof bow|, oover w|th bo|||ng
water and soak aooord|ng to paoket
|nstruot|ons. Dra|n we||, spoon |nto the
bow|s and top w|th 300g shredded
poached or roast ch|cken.
3. Br|ng 2| ch|cken stock to the bo|| |n
a |arge pan over a h|gh heat and b|anoh
one bunch of tr|mmed asparagus
unt|| tender but or|sp. ||ft out w|th a
s|otted spoon and add to the bow|s.
4. Add 90m| oyster sauce, 1.5tbsp
caster sugar and 3tbsp ||me ju|ce to
the stook. |ad|e over the nood|es and
fn|sh w|th cor|ander |eaves, ne|y
s||ced red ch|||| and spr|ng on|ons
to taste and a ||me wedge.
Fishcakes
(serves 4}
1. Bo|| 300g
potatoes,
pee|ed and
ohopped, for
about 25 m|nutes
unt|| tender. Dra|n and rough|y mash.
2. Put |n a bow| w|th 415g t|nned
sa|mon, 40g p|a|n our, four spr|ng
on|ons, ohopped, 3tbsp pars|ey,
ohopped, 3tbsp cor|ander, ohopped,
one |arge green ch|||| (de-seeded, |f
g
g
S|mp|e
approach: B|||
Granger
P|oture: Ham|sh Jordan
MONACO: The wor|d's |argest so|ar-powered catamaran |eaves
Monaco harbour on her ma|den voyage around the wor|d. The
two-man crew aboard the 31m (102ft| |ong Turanor P|anetso|ar
hope to trave| at average speeds of 14kph (8mph| P|oture: EPA
Kidnap victim
writes memoir
AMERICA: A
kidnap survivor
held for 18 years
is writing her
memoirs. Jaycee
Dugard (picturedj
will release her
book next year. The 30-year-old,
who had two daughters with her
abductor, covers being seized in
1991, her rescue last year and
how she is coping now. 'When l
read the pages, l was moved,'
said Jonathan Karp, vice
president of publisher Simon &
Schuster. Phillip Garrido and his
wife Nancy are still awaiting trial
in California on charges of
kidnapping, rape and
imprisonment.
1ohg-il's soh geLs
sLep Lo leadership
NORTH KOREA: K|m Jong-||
yesterday appo|nted h|s
youngest son as a m|||tary
genera|, s|gna|||ng the rst
stage of h|s eventua|
success|on. The a|||ng |eader
|s not expected to ret|re just
yet but the dec|s|on |s
des|gned to he|p K|m Jong-un
prepare to take over the re|ns.
The 68-year-o|d a|so made h|s
daughter Kyong-hu| a genera|.
She |s seen as a keen backer
of K|m Jong-un. The move
come ahead of a rare meet|ng
today of the ru||ng Workers'
Party, wh|ch experts say |s
part of the p|an to map out the
fam||y's cont|nued ru|e.
chavez's grip on
power weakens
VENEZUELA:
President Hugo
Chavez has lost
his stranglehold
on the country's
National
Assembly, it was
revealed yesterday. His socialist
party won at least 96 of the 165
seats in Sunday's election but
fell short of the two-thirds
majority that had allowed him to
rewrite laws unopposed. Mr
Chavez (picturedj called it a
'solid victory' over the opposition
coalition, which boycotted the
last elections in 2005. Opposition
governor Pablo Perez said: 'We
showed venezuela that we can
advance if we're united.'
Rulers ih Lurmoil
over cuLs proLesLs
ROMANlA: The government
was thrown |nto uproar
yesterday over auster|ty
protests. The |nter|or m|n|ster
res|gned, the oppos|t|on
demanded the pr|me m|n|ster
step down and po||ce he|d
emergency ta|ks w|th the
pres|dent. The chaos reected
fa||out from the sharp wage
cuts, tax h|kes and other
measures the government has
taken to ght |ts budget dec|t
am|d a deep recess|on.
Roman|ans took to the streets
of Bucharest, the cap|ta|,
severa| t|mes |ast week to
protest aga|nst pres|dent
Tra|an Basescu's government.
ahd nally.
SWITZERLAND: A young motorist wrote off his father's 130,000
Porsche just minutes after taking delivery. Max Richter, 23, impaled the
911 Turbo on a safety barrier while practising for the Cannonball Run
road race. 'He said the family had just taken delivery of the car. His
father was not impressed,' said a Zurich police spokesman.
Iordan queen has heart treatment
AMERICA: Queen Rania of Jordan (picturedj was
yesterday recovering from a procedure at a New York
hospital to correct an irregular heartbeat. The 40-
year-old was said to be in 'good spirits' after the non-
surgical treatment went 'very smoothly', the royal
palace said. The mother of four was in the US while
her husband King Abdullah ll attended UN assembly
meetings. She is expected to spend two nights in
hospital before returning home later in the week.
"B o
Bo B
} .BB
NATO helicopters in eastern Afghani-
stan launched rare airstrikes into Paki-
stan in an operation against the Tali-
ban, killing more than 50 militants and
prompting a protest from Islamabad.
The airstrikes came after insurgents
attacked a small Afghan security out-
post near the border and were made in
'self-defence` a Nato spokesman said.
They were part of 'Operation Drag-
on Strike`, a joint military push with
Afghan forces around the southern
city of Kandahar intending to rid the
area of insurgents.
US offcials have claimed they have
an agreement to enter Pakistan`s air-
space in pursuit of a target. However
yesterday the Pakistan government
denied this.
The frst strike, believed to have killed
49 militants, took place on Saturday af-
ter insurgents in Pakistan attacked the
outpost in Afghanistan`s eastern prov-
ince of Khost. At least four more were
killed in the second attack when heli-
copters returned to the border area and
were attacked by insurgents based in
Pakistan. Intelligence offcials in the
country said a third strike was carried
out yesterday morning, killing fve mil-
itants and wounding nine.
British offcials said yesterday they
were in contact with Afghan authori-
ties about the disappearance of a Brit-
ish aid worker and three Afghan col-
leagues ambushed on Sunday in
northeastern Kunar province.
Bfo 1
THREE Austra||an spec|a| forces
so|d|ers have been charged w|th
mans|aughter after a ra|d on an
Afghan compound |eft ve
ch||dren dead. They are a|so
charged w|th dangerous conduct
and fa|||ng to comp|y w|th a
|awfu| genera| order. The
operat|on |n February |ast year
was a|med at ush|ng out Ta||ban
ghters |n Uruzgan. It |s a||eged
they targeted the wrong house.
g
R R oo
PREGNANT women can receive the abortion pill by 'remote control`
under a pioneering scheme. Patients in remote areas of Iowa are able to
visit their nearest clinic, meet a nurse and then hold a video conference
with a faraway doctor. If no concerns are raised, the doctor remotely
opens a dispenser, releasing the pill. The Planned Parenthood of the
Heartland scheme could be taken up in other rural areas of the US but
has been labelled 'vending-machine distribution` by anti-abortionists.
Consu|tat|on: A doctor, front, and a nurse |n another c|ty show how
the v|deo |nterv|ew |s conducted P|otures: AP
Approved: The p||| d|spenser
Israelis start building as
Abbas mulls over talks
ISRAELI bulldozers resumed work on
West Bank settlements yesterday, as
Palestinian leaders said they would
wait a week before deciding whether
0 !\o
to pull out of Middle East peace talks
in protest. In Revava, Israeli settlers
released 2,000 balloons - one for
each apartment they plan to construct
after the ten-month 'building freeze`
ended on Sunday night. 'Today the
ban is over and we will do everything
we can to make sure it never happens
again,` settler leader Dani Dayan told
the crowds.
'We return with new energy and a
new determination to populate this
land.`
The freeze was imposed by Israeli
leader Benjamin Netanyahu last year
to coax the Palestinians to the peace
talks - but it will not be extended
after complaints from elements in his
governing coalition.
Construction in the West Bank and
east Jerusalem is opposed by the
Palestinians because they claim the
areas for their future state.
Palestinian president Mahmoud
Abbas said he would discuss the
matter with the 22-member Arab
League next Monday before deciding
whether to quit the peace talks.
'We will not have any quick reac-
tions,` he said. 'After this chain of
meetings, we might publish a position
that clears up the position of the Pal-
estinian and Arab people after Israel
has refused to freeze settlements.`
He urged Israel to reinstate the build-
ing slow-down for three or four months
to discuss 'fundamental issues`.
D|gg|ng |n:
A bu||dozer
beg|ns
work on
pr|vate
homes |n
the Jew|sh
sett|ement
of Adam |n
the West
Bank
yesterday
P|oture: EPA
Chirac to
pay up but
faces trial
FORMER French president
Jacques Chirac has agreed to pay
1.9million to the city of Paris as
he tries to avoid a fraud trial. The
money equates to the salaries of
21 people hired for fake jobs
while Mr Chirac was mayor of the
French capital. The deal means
the city will drop out of the
corruption case. But the 77-year-
old still faces a criminal trial on
charges of embezzlement and
breach of trust dating from 1977
to 1995, when he was mayor. 'This
agreement is good for the city of
Paris, good for Mr Chirac, and
good on every level,` his lawyer
Jean Veil said. Mr Chirac has
denied any wrongdoing but is
likely to face trial later this year.
Dea|:
Jac-
ques
Ch|rac
29.8 APR
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A high-rise view of life
THERE`S little chance of getting
close to nature in downtown Brooklyn
but Kenneth Feldman has seen a
squirrel give birth to three litters
fromthe comfort of his NewYork
at. The squirrel set up home in a
window box outside a roomMr
Feldman uses for yoga. The web
developer has created a blog to post
video and pictures of his new family.
He put up a cardboard blind on the
inside of the window with a small
viewing hole so the animals are not
disturbed by movement in the room.
0F0s 'interfere'
with our nukes
Bfo 1
ALIENS have interfered with
nuclear weapons - including some
in Britain - former members of the
US Air Force have claimed.
According to UFO researcher
Robert Hastings, several US Air
Force personnel saw a strange
metallic object hovering in Rend-
lesham Forest, near RAF Bent-
water in Suffolk.
He said the information 'alters
the historical perspective on the
nuclear arms race and much,
much more`. Ex-US Air Force
chief Charles Halt was working at
the base in 1980.
Several of his base`s security
forces saw lights in the forest near
Woodbridge, he claimed.
Two patrolmen were sent out to
approach the craft, which they de-
scribed as 'triangular, dark metal-
lic in appearance`.
The mysterious object quickly
and silently 'vanished at high
speed`, he claimed.
But papers released by the Na-
tional Archives show the Ministry
of Defence`s fnal position was
that there was 'no evidence of
anything having intruded into
British airspace`.
Mr Hastings held a press con-
ference in Washington to
'address the vital issue of UFO
incursions at US nuclear weapons
sites over the past six decades`. Comfy: One of the ||tters reared |n Kenneth Fe|dman's w|ndow box P|oture: Wenn
lane jets into history
by 0ying without 0aps
Tuesday, September 28, 2010 25
The apless 0emon uAV
The Demon
UAv employs
the Coanda
effect to
manoeuvre
Jets are
positioned at
the back of the
wing that
disrupt and
manipulate the
boundary layer
The Coanda effect is the
tendency of a fuid jet to be
attracted to a nearby surface.
ln this case it's another jet of
air from the wing which in turn
forces the wing in the
opposite direction
W|ng
A|r ow creates a
boundary |ayer
W|ng
A|r from jet
|n the w|ng
3B 3B
THE world`s frst 'fapless` plane has
been developed by British engineers.
The unmanned craft, called Demon,
uses hundreds of tiny air jets to con-
trol its movement in
fight rather than us-
ing traditional fap mechanisms.
The technology would give military
aircraft a more stealthy profle by reduc-
ing edges and gaps that can be picked up
by radar, said its developers.
It could also cut fuel and maintenance
costs, they added. The craft, which has a
2.4m (8ft) wingspan, made its maiden
voyage on Walney Island off the Cum-
brian coast on September 17.
Demon was developed by engineers
from Manchester and Cranfeld univers-
ities, together with BAE Systems.
'Flying it successfully has required
great skill, dedication and patience by
the team and they should be very proud
of their achievement,` said Prof John
Fielding of Cranfeld University.
'I was in Cumbria to watch Demon fy
and I feel sure I have witnessed a signif-
icant moment in aviation history,` said
Richard Williams, BAE Systems prog-
ramme director for future capability.
5PY 5P0R5: Fungl
have an aercdynamlo way tc
reduoe drag cn thelr spcres tc
spread them as hlgh and as far as
pcsslble, researohers olalm.
Solerctlnla solerctlcrum spews cut
thcusands cf spcres tc oreate a
plume oapable cf oarrylng them
20 tlmes further than a slngle
spcre oculd travel alcne. The US
study appears ln lrcoeedlngs cf
the Natlcnal ôademy cf Solenoes.
M
X-RAY VI5I0N: The
largest ever Xray telesocpe ls
soheduled tc launoh ln 2021. US,
Lurcpean and 1apanese solentlsts
belleve lt wlll glve the mcst detalled
lnslght ever lntc the dawn cf tlme.
The 1,300m
2
lnternatlcnal XRay
0bservatcry wlll be able tc ldentlfy
3mllllcn new blaok hcles. Scme cf
these may even be supermasslve
blaok hcles whloh prcbably
develcped befcre the flrst stars.
M
BI1 0F A BLUR: vlewers
cf Tv serles CSl may be famlllar
wlth tlltshlft phctcgraphy, uslng
blur effeots tc make real lmages
lcck llke mlnlature mcdels. But the
way the teohnlque 'fccls` us has
cnly ncw been prcven by the
Unlverslty cf St ^ndrews. 'The
braln uses the pclnt cf blur at the
eye tc oaloulate dlstanoe... henoe
mlstaklng llfeslze cbjeots far away
fcr mlnlatures,` solentlsts sald.
M
lf you have a story for HiniCosm please
email us at Cosm@ukmetro.co.uk
HlNlu
SClLNCL & ulSCuvLP lN 8PlLl
D&AD rewards Ihe
peop/e beh/nd Ihe
besI adverI/s/ng and
des/gn /n Ihe wor/d
BehindThe Idea
I cah't say ho to this
truly tasty Fry app
executive creative director at digital agency
glue lsobar, on an innovative app that leaves
conventional reading in a spin
Read on: Dare's John G|bbard
deve|oped the myFry read|ng
app for |Phone, |eft, and |Pad
Listen to some
truly great 0anes
g
Next week's D&AD Pres|dent's
Lecture prov|des a rare
opportun|ty to hear from the
three founders of Copenhagen
based des|gn super-group K|B|S|.
Expect ta|es of hedon|st|c
susta|nab|||ty, urban mob|||ty and
Darw|n|an des|gn evo|ut|on as
Bjarke Inge|s, Lars Ho|me and
Jens Mart|n d|scuss how the|r
co||aborat|on has evo|ved.
K|B|S| merges the product|on
know-how and des|gn sens|b|||ty
of K||o Des|gn - the b|g |deas and
|arge-sca|e perspect|ve of BIG
arch|tects - and the |dea dr|ven
|nnovat|on and brand awareness
of Sk|bstead Ideat|on.
Each year the D&AD Pres|dent
|nv|tes |con|c gures and up-
and-com|ng creat|ve
pract|t|oners to speak about the|r
careers, the|r |ndustry and the|r
hot top|cs.
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reated by digital agency

Dare and info-graphic
artist Stefanie Posavec,
the myFry reading
application for iPhone
and iPod Touch allows
readers to explore the book`s content
in a whole new way using an
interactive index.
Launched earlier this month by
Penguin Books, the app supports the
printed edition of Stephen Fry`s
second volume of his
autobiography, The Fry
Chronicles.
'With a fresh, fexible
and interactive way of
looking at things, the
app allows readers to
engage with it in a
novel way. It is
completely on-brand
for Stephen Fry and is
exactly what I`d expect
from him, I bet he
loves it,` says Royce.
'The idea that the book works in a
non-linear fashion is also a
fascinating one, opening up a whole
new way of accessing a text.`
The structure allows readers to
create their own personal narrative
by spinning through 112 self-
contained sections on a tagged
colourwheel.
'We noticed a change in the way
people are reading, especially non-
fction and online,` says Dare`s John
Gibbard, 'dipping in
and out of content,
following themes,
concepts and subjects
and not necessarily
consuming in a linear,
end-to-end fashion.`
Gibbard admits the
response to myFry has
been 'predominantly
enthusiastic` due to a
growing view the way
we access text should
be dependent on the
content and the context of how and
where it is read.
'Cute page-turning graphics might
seem the right thing to do, copying
what books have done, but that soon
gets tired. We really wanted to keep
the patina of reading a book though.`
The well-thumbed pages are now
'favourites`, the turned corners are
now sections marked 'read`.
Optimised to access content on a
small screen whilst on the move, the
interactive re-working of Fry`s
autobiography also boasts a ready-
made archive that includes web links
to additional content, expanding on
topics and anecdotes in the book.
'It is a fascinating concept,`
concludes Royce. 'There`s nothing
not to like about this. It`s new,
original and different. It intrigues me.`
Seb Royce
To give your opinion, go to
www.dandad.orgJmetro
Links in the
creative chain
g
Metro has joined forces
with0&A0, the organisation
behind the 0scars of the
advertising world, to bring
you the latest ideas in
advertising and design, as
chosen by the experts. It
could be a TV commercial
that is better than the
programmes. 0r maybe an
iconic laptop you just have
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design of the coins in your
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des/gn /n Ihe wor/d
For more details, visit
www.dandad.orgJmetro
Metro uuide Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Teen is
denied
op to
rebuild
skull
A TEENAGER is being
denied a 10,000 NHS
operation to rebuild his
skull. Shaun Kilgariff was
critically injured in
October in a motorbike
crash which caused his
brain to swell. Surgeons
removed part of his skull
to save him but now the
supermarket worker, 18, is
waiting for an operation to
rebuild it. His surgeon
wants to do a 10,000
custom bone cranioplasty,
which would ft a
synthetic implant similar
to bone on to his skull.
But Stoke-on-Trent NHS
trust will pay only for a
2,500 operation to ft a
titanium plate. Doctors
have told Shaun, from
Stoke-on-Trent, the plate
will give him a square
head and would need
replacing. His family is
appealing against the
trust`s decision. Father
Christopher, 52, said: 'The
10,000 operation might
be more expensive, but the
titanium plate will need to
be replaced, so it doesn`t
make fnancial sense.` The
trust, which has one other
request for an implant, is
awaiting specialist advice.
Irving hails
Hitler as a
'great man'
REVISIONIST historian David Irving
has praised Adolf Hitler and described
the Gestapo as 'fabulous policemen`
during a controversial tour of Nazi death
camps in Poland.
Irving, jailed in Austria in 2006 after
calling the Holocaust into question, told
fans on the 1,500-a-head trip that Hitler
should be compared to Hannibal - one of
the most talented commanders in history.
His comments, recorded by an under-
cover Italian reporter, will be studied by
the Polish secret service, which has been
monitoring the group.
The 72-year-old said Hitler could be
'very cruel` but was not immoral. 'He
held the military forces of the world for
six years, exactly like Hannibal - but
nobody has never denied the greatness
of Hannibal. Hitler was a great man, one
of the greatest Europeans for centuries.`
Irving also told his party of 11 tourists
from Britain, the US, Germany and Aus-
tralia that German offcer Claus von
Stauffenberg was a 'traitor` for trying to
assassinate Hitler.
The tourists have raised eyebrows too.
After visiting a death camp, one guest
reportedly said to laughter: 'What a ter-
rible smell. It`s like a gas chamber`.
Polish group the Open RepublicAssoc-
iation Against Anti-Semitism and Xeno-
phobia wants Irving charged with 'min-
imising` the scale of Nazi atrocities.
Fred Attewill
Team ta|k:
Dav|d Irv|ng
exto|s the
v|rtues of
H|t|er and
the Naz|
reg|me to
members of
h|s tour
party
P|oture: EPA
olice7 I have
a cat burglart
o 3B
A TIME-WASTER rang 999 to report
that a neighbour`s cat had wandered
into his home, it emerged yesterday.
The worried man said the 'large` pet
had walked in through an open door -
and was told to pick it up and remove it
from the house.
It was one of 4,000 inappropriate
emergency calls received by Glouces-
tershire Police this year.
Others include a cat owner who was
worried that his pet had not come home
(perhaps linked top the call above?), a
teenager who reported that he did not
like the way his parents had decorated
his room, a disgruntled taxi driver who
had not been paid and a woman who
was fed up with neighbours playing
loud music.
'Quite often 999 calls are not
malicious but are down to a lack of
knowledge of how to get hold of the
emergency services routinely,` said Insp
Andy Poole of the control room.
The force also had several silent or
unintelligible 999 calls after babies and
toddlers had been playing with their
parents` phones.
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crossrail rules out swish
newtrains to slash costs
THERE will be no futuristic trains
on the multi-billion-pound Cross-
rail line as costs are reined in,
bosses revealed yesterday.
Project managers have decided
that designing new trains from
scratch is too costly.
Instead, trains for the 117km
(73-mile) route will be based on
'tried and tested` designs.
Crossrail Limited also revealed
that Whitechapel and CanaryWharf
stations are being redesigned to
drive down costs.
Another saving will involve the
use of disused rail lines for a major
proportion of the branch to Abbey
Wood, south-east London.
'It is critical that every pound in-
vested in this vital scheme achieves
maximum value for money.
'Sensible effciency savings will
be made at every opportunity,` said
3B 3B
Crossrail chairman Terry Morgan.
'We are looking at every aspect of
Crossrail to identify where eff-
ciencies can be made and under-
standing what cost-saving lessons
can be learned from other global
infrastructure projects.`
The 16billion cross-capital line
is due to come into service in 2017.
Managers insisted that any savings
would not mean shortening the
planned route, running fromMaid-
enhead in Berkshire to Shenfeld
in Essex, or scrapping stations.
Contracts for major tunnelling
and station work will be awarded
over the next year.
Crossrail said the scheme was
worth 42billion to the economy
- a fgure above a previous esti-
mate of 36billion.
Bare cheek of mah
ih mass rail brawl
A NAKED man and up to 30
other drunk revellers were
involved in a brawl on a train.
The nude passenger also caused
havoc by wandering along
carriages, said rail workers. 'A
member of staff I spoke to said
he`d never seen anything like it,
except on television,` said Craig
Johnston, of the RMT rail union.
The incident, on Saturday night
between Carlisle and west
Cumbria, led to 13 arrests.
Kihdergarteh cops
get a hursery hick
CHILDREN have built their
own police station at a nursery.
The 21 youngsters, aged
between two and four,
constructed a cell and installed
a front desk and blue lights for
their 'mock` nick. 'They wanted
to show they knew the
difference between right and
wrong,` said Ruth Edwards, a
supervisor at Cheverell Pre
School and Nursery in Great
Cheverell, Wiltshire.
Growth |ndustry: Farmer Dav|d Bowman s|ts on pumpk|ns p|cked |n t|me for
Ha||oween. The 62-year-o|d grew 3m||||on - the b|ggest harvest |n Europe - |n
Spa|d|ng, L|nco|nsh|re. 'I w||| be g|ad when |t's over,' he sa|d P|oture: Masons
Your wInler lroveI mogozIne from Melro
0nmIssobIeIroveI
lnspIrolIon
OOMlNG5OON
H0W T0 WIN
To be |n w|th the ohanoe of w|nn|ng one of
200 pa|rs of t|okets for HYPER JAPAN on Fr|day
or Sunday and for fu|| terms and oond|t|ons
go to www.metro.co.uk and o||ok on WIN.
Or text JAPAN fo||owed by your FIRST NAME,
POSTCODE and PREFERRED DAY to 65400,
|.e. JAPAN ALISON W85TT SUNDAY.
Text oosts 50p. Standard network oharges app|y.
The oompet|t|on o|oses at m|dn|ght on Tuesday, September 28 2010. W|nners w|||
be ohosen at random from entr|es reoe|ved and not|f|ed by 6pm on Wednesday,
September 29 2010. sua| Metro Promot|ona| Ru|es app|y (see metro.oo.uk/w|n}.
The Ed|tor's deo|s|on |s f|na|. The promoter |s Metro, 2 Derry Street, |ondon W8 5TT.
WIN TIcKET5 F0R HVER 3AAN
H
YPER JAPAN |s a brand new Japanese
pop ou|ture and food|e event tak|ng p|aoe
|n the heart of East |ondon th|s weekend
and Metro has 400 t|ckets to g|ve away to |uoky
readers who want to be part of the pop party.
Shop the |atest exo|us|ve Japanese produots and
samp|e new and exo|t|ng food at Eat-Japan food
oourt. Fr|day's Sake Sem|nar and other food|e ||ve
w||| be a must-see.
JETRO bus|ness area at HYPER JAPAN |s for
trade v|s|tors w|th an |nterest |n Japanese bus|ness
and markets on food and dr|nk. For trade v|s|tors,
reg|ster to get a free pass on||ne.
HVER 3AAN London 2010
1-3 0ctober 2010 at
The 0ld Truman Brewery
For more information:
www.hyperjapan.co.uk
METR0 R0M0TI0N
Fiona upset
by stalker's
'loveletters'
NEWSREADER Fiona Bruce was left
'upset and disturbed` after a stalker
bombarded her with fowers and cards,
a court heard yesterday.
The 46-year-old was targeted by Peter
Oakey who referred to her as his 'beau-
tiful frebird` in cards sent to BBC Tel-
evision Centre.
His 'sinister` gifts and notes were in-
tercepted before Miss Bruce ever saw
them but she complained to police early
in 2008 that she feared 'his behaviour
could escalate`.
Oakey admitted harassing the TV pre-
senter and breaching a restraining order
by sending her 20 cards in 2009.
His notes were signed, 'Your kingfsher
and loving husband Peter` and at least
one of them said: 'Time to get down
and attend to business.`
Oakey, from Brentwood, Essex, is due
to be sentenced at Basildon crown court
next month. The case was adjourned.
Fred Attewill
Pers|stent: Peter Oakey adm|ts
harass|ng F|ona Bruce
MeeI me oI
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I'mon a roll with
stars' loo paper
o 3B
A TOILET roll designer who
supplies celebrities with printed
paper has thanked Simon Cowell
for helping her clean up in the
business world.
Natasha Meredith started the
Designer Toilet Roll Company after
fnding that the X Factor boss buys
black loo roll at 10 a go.
The mother of fve now supplies
designer toilet paper to the likes of
Katie Price and Dame Judi Dench
- and will be kitting out this year`s
X Factor house.
'I was watching the X Factor last
year and they were saying Simon
Cowell has black loo roll in his LA
mansion,` she said.
'I went straight on eBay and got a
pack for 10 and sold them within
the day,` added the 42-year-old,
from Crawley, West Sussex, who
discovered that nobody in Britain
catered to the designer loo roll mar-
ket. 'When your friends come round
you buy better wine and nice nap-
kins but they still have to go to the
toilet. It`s just an impressive touch
to the bathroom.`
A brothel in Soho bought her
'safari` range of loo rolls - featur-
ing animal print designs - and
glamour model Price snapped up
paper with a wedding motif on it for
her recent nuptials with Alex Reid.
Ms Meredith said that X Factor
bosses contacted her to supply the
house this year.
'I`ve even had pensioners from
Rochdale ordering it to spruce up
their sheltered fats,` she added.
Other designs include polka dots,
fowers and hearts. The loo rolls
also come in a variety of colours,
including lime green and pink.
It's a||veI Bor|s Johnson at the L'Orea|
Young Sc|ent|st Centre |n London
yesterday. The mayor v|s|ted for the
Story of London |aunch, ce|ebrat|ng
the cap|ta|'s p|oneer|ng past P|oture: Rex
lt hgures... the news in numbers
British cheese week
Po|| of 1,710
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Po|| of 1,710
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/ess t|an 2 per cent of t|ose oo||ed
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t|an 700 named c|eeses. Nea||y 10 per
cent of oeoo|e a|e 0nawa|e t|at m||| |s t|e
ma|n |ng|ed|ent |n c|eese, t||s hg0|e ||ses to
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t|ose oo||ed, 98.5 per cent |ave no |dea
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goats' c|eese, Gev|||, |s oa|t|c0|a||y oafh|ng:
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;"
Dermot O`Leary`s compilation
albumThe Saturday Sessions is
out next Monday on Sony
Music. The Radio 2 star is
celebrating the release with a
party in central
London this
Thursday, with
performances from
stars such as Alesha
Dixon and Athlete.
To win tickets for
you and friend,
email your name
and mobile number
to guilty
pleasuresQ
ukmetro.co.uk
Spoilt for choice - but
Dermot has it covered
X Factor host Dermot O`Leary said
choosing tracks for his compilation
album was a
nightmare task. The
DJ is releasing The
Saturday Sessions,
featuring songs from
his Radio 2 show by
artists such as Massive
Attack, Ellie
Goulding, Katy Perry,
Paolo Nutini and
Florence And The
Machine. But the
presenter told Metro it was a
painstaking exercise to whittle
down his favourites. 'It was like
Sophie`s Choice choosing the
tracks, there are so many
impressive performances,` he said,
referring to the 1982 flm in which
Meryl Streep has to choose
between her two children. O`Leary
promised the collection`s many
cover versions would put a new
spin on popular songs, adding:
'The great thing is you don`t really
hear what a song is truly about
until you hear someone else pull it
apart. For example, I didn`t realise
what Britney was actually singing
about in Womanizer until I heard
Lily Allen slow it right down. It is
serious stuff.` Meanwhile, the 37-
year-old is in training to become a
chef after launching two seafood
restaurants called FishyFishy.
'We`ve just opened the second in
Poole,` he said. 'It is seriously hard
work and not something I`m taking
lightly. I actually started out in a
kitchen and I am going into
training to become a professional
chef.` And while he is not ready to
take on Gordon Ramsay just yet,
his restaurant`s chef might be. 'He
has written some seriously good
recipes in the kitchen and I would
like to do something on TV with
him,` said O`Leary. The star added
the X Factor team had pulled
together in tough times this year.
'We`ve had our backs against the
wall with [Cheryl Cole and Dannii
Minogue] away but it has brought
out the best in everyone,` he said.
'St|tch-up': Maa
Chloe:
My pop
career is
wrecked
X Factor reject Chloe
Maha has admitted it
will be hard to start a
pop career following
allegations of drug-
taking and prostitution.
'Of course I want to
have a career but I
think it is in tatters,` she
said. Viewers watched
at the weekend as the
19-year-old, whose real
name is Chloe Heald,
failed to get through to
the next round on the
ITV talent show. The
teenager added that she
had been 'set up` and
denied being a call girl.
'I`m dehnitely not a
prostitute. I`ve not been
paid for sex,` she told
This Morning. But
Chloe admitted taking
'a couple of lines` of
cocaine and said she
was 'so stupid` to have
done it.
We||-hee|ed: P|x|e Lott goes c|assy as
the 19-year-o|d mode|s a new range
of c|othes from L|psy, |aunched today.
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More 0uilty leasures gossip over the page
Char: I asked Cav
to OK hew lover
A
'raw` Charlotte Church
says she asked former
fanc Gavin Henson if
it would be 'OK` to
date her new boyfriend.
The singer revealed her awkward
request to the Welsh rugby star while
insisting her relationship with
musician Johnny Powell did not start
before she and Henson, 28, split in
May - just weeks after she accepted
his wedding proposal. Now Church
says her love life has been turned
into a soap opera. 'I`d been writing
with Johnny for a while but it was a
good couple of months after me and
Gav split,` she says. 'I kind of asked
Gav`s permission in a way. I said to
him, 'I really want you to know that
nothing ever went on between me
and Johnny while we were still
together. Johnny had a girlfriend
when we were frst working together
and I had Gav.` Church says she is no
love cheat, adding: 'I`m not that type
of person. I hadn`t really noticed any
feelings [towards Johnny] at that
point. When I`m a taken woman, I`m
a taken woman. And I`ve still got a
lot of love and respect for Gav.`
Revealing her feelings for her new
lover, the 24-year-old tells Heat
magazine: 'Johnny`s amazing and
brilliant but it`s early days and the
split with Gav is still raw. He`s really
great, he`s lovely but, to be honest,
I`m pretty self-suffcient. It`s all very
early stages at the moment but
everyone is jumping the gun. It`s
great because we like the same stuff.
He`s very intelligent, very clever and
he`s an amazing musician. That`s
where most of the bond
lies. A lot of the time
we`re together, we
write songs, talk about
music.` On talk of
being in love, she
responds: 'I wouldn`t
say that it wasn`t but
then I wouldn`t say that
it was. I wouldn`t want
everyone to know if it
was or it wasn`t. You
have to keep something
back for yourself. I`ve
been so honest about my personal
life, it`s all people are interested in.
I`ve become a bit of a soap character!`
Read the full interview in this week`s
Heat magazine, on sale now.
Andrei
Harmsworth
No cheat:
Char|otte
Church
says her
new
re|at|on-
sh|p
started
after her
sp||t from
Gav|n
Henson
P|oture: Steve
Neaves
.oBo Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Co|ourfu| career: R|hanna chooses another strange ensemb|e as she
shoots a v|deo for new s|ng|e What's My Name? |n New York P|oture: Sp|ash
Sugababes singer Amelle Berrabah is
close to 'rock bottom` after being
stopped for drink-driving. She
blamed her early morning run-
in with police on a hangover
from the night before. She
said she was on her way for a
jog when she was pulled over
in her Mercedes in north
London at 5.23am last
Thursday. 'I`d been out the
night before for drinks with
friends and got stopped on the way to
meet my personal trainer and it was
obviously still in my system. I`m so
angry with myself - I felt fne
and had a coffee,` she wrote on
Twitter. After checking into
rehab last year following the
Sugababes fallout, Berrabah
warned she was struggling with
the negative headlines. 'Why do
papers always write horrid stuff
on me, I feel like I`m going rock
bottom again,` she wrote. The 26-
year-old is due in court on October 8.
Drihk-drive charge
Amelle 'really low'
1ailbird LiLo
visits teehs
ih a shelter
Lindsay Lohan put her prison
woes aside by visiting homeless
teenagers at a shelter in Los
Angeles in a bid to 'give back`
to the community. The actress,
who was released from jail on
Saturday, chatted to people at
the Dream Center with her
mother Dina and 16-year-old
sister Ali. 'What a great place
The Dream Center is here in
LA... had a nice time there
today, it`s so important to give
back. I feel blessed,` she wrote
on Twitter.
Price will pay lip
service to surgery
Katie Price is undergoing a string of
painful laser treatments to fx her botched
lip job, her cosmetic therapist has
revealed. The 32-year-old model is
spending thousands of pounds on the
procedure after complaining on her reality
TV show that she looks like 'a duck`.
'She`d had some work done, some of
which she wasn`t happy with, and that`s
why she came to me for some advice. She
obviously had a problem with her lips,`
therapist Nilam Patel told new! magazine.
'The problem with Katie`s fller is we`re
not sure exactly what`s in her lips.` But
it`s not only her face Price is worried
about - she also wants another boob job.
Ex-Big Brother star Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace has blamed
`date rape' drug GHB for an embarrassing exit from a
nightclub earlier this month in which she fell out of her
silk jumpsuit. The 31-year-old claimed she woke up in a
hospital hooked up to a drip and that tests showed the drug in
her system. She drank champagne given to her by a friend of a
friend and it `tasted funny', she told Reveal magazine.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010 uuilty leasures
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Eye-fu||: Katy Perry pokes fun at Sesame Street producers who pu||ed
her cameo for be|ng too sexy by wear|ng a p|ung|ng E|mo T-sh|rt. The
25-year-o|d unve||ed her outt on Saturday N|ght L|ve P|oture: P|anet Photos
Ahdy serves up
a treat for 1amie
T
eetotal tennis star Andy
Murray served up a
cracker of a stag do for
big brother Jamie which
left him seeing double.
Best man Andy, 23, took charge of
the night of partying, which involved
ten bottles of bubbly and a superhero
theme. Jamie, a doubles specialist -
that`s tennis doubles - donned a
Superman outft as the brothers took
over Prince Harry`s favourite party
booth for the knees-up at Mayfair`s
Whisky Mist nightspot. They were
joined for some serious drinking by
other faces from the ATP Tour.
Just when the 24-year-old groom-to-
be thought he had been subjected to
enough humiliation in his costume,
Andy had his sibling on the back
foot again. 'Andy bought his brother
the Whisky Mist Batman Show. Four
dancers put on Joker masks and the
waiter dressed as Batman to wheel
out ten bottles of Dom Perignon,`
said my source.
'It certainly put the groom in the
mood. He was dancing on chairs
until 3.30am,` said the spy.
The hangover comes ahead of
Murray senior`s plans to wed
Colombian fance Alejandra
Gutierrez at a secret location in
Scotland on Sunday. His best man,
this year`s Australian Open fnalist,
has already been measured up for his
kilt ahead of the big day. It is the
latest love match in the Murray
household after Andy himself
reunited with his long term lover, 22-
year-old Kim Sears, in May. She
moved back into Murray`s 5million
gated community home in Surrey
after the pair initially split last
November after four years together.
Andrei
Harmsworth
I owe iL all Lo MeLro, says Dev
It's not often we get a thank-you from the stars but
Slumdog Millionaire star Dev Patel says he owes his
success to Metro... and his mother. The 20-year-old
told crew members on new ick The Commuter, for
Nokia N8, that his big break in E4 drama Skins
came after he read an advert for casting in these
very pages. `My mum found the advert for the Skins
audition and put me forward - it is because of Metro
I got the part,' he told our source on set. We're glad
to have been of assistance!
Brother|y |ove: Andy and Jam|e
o
Arts utertaiumeut
1he 8ig Interview6auguin Lxhibition

Uhlockihg a
An exhibition of auI
6auguin's work is going on
dispIay for the rst time in
8ritain in more than 50 years.
LLAlR ALLfR meets one of
those behind the show
eopIe have aIways been
obsessed with the tragedy
of van 6ogh but 6auguin's
Iife was [ust as hard - he
had ve chiIdren
6auuiu's Maic LircIe: Bis frieuds Aud RivaIs
try to confront rotten

civilisation with something
more natural, based on
savagery,` wrote artist Paul
Gauguin to his good friend
Vincent van Gogh in 1889.
'I have Indian blood, Inca blood in me,
and it`s refected in everything I do. It`s
the basis of my personality.`
Gauguin, who died in 1903, probably
of syphilis, on the French Polynesian
island of Atuona, is the enfant terrible of
modern art - a brawler, a drinker, a former
seaman and a self-styled outlaw who left
his wife and children in Copenhagen and
established his own personality cult in the
provincial French village of Pont-Aven.
His innovative, brilliant, colour-saturated
depictions of rural life in Brittany and
later in Polynesia can be said to have
infuenced the course of 20th-century art
more than the work of almost any other
painter, yet for more than half a century
no major British exhibition has been
devoted to his work.
'People have always been obsessed with
the tragedy of van Gogh,` says Christine
Riding, co-curator of a major new Tate
Modern exhibition that aims to
rehabilitate this great post-Impressionist.
'But Gauguin`s life was just as hard - he
had fve children. His work paved the way
for Fauvism and for Picasso.`
Gauguin: Maker Of Myth attempts
to unlock the complex and often
contradictory identity at the heart of
Gauguin`s extensive body of work.
The exhibition features more than 100
paintings, wood carvings and ceramics
from a career that began relatively late -
Gauguin abandoned a lucrative life as a
stockbroker for a fnancially disastrous
one as a painter in his mid-thirties.
Possessing a proto 21st-century feel
for the power of self-mythology, he
intentionally set about creating various
parallel personal narratives: a loving
father scraping together whatever money
he could for his wife, Mette; a creative,
tempestuous rebel who rejected bourgeois
Paris to establish his own rules with the
Pont-Aven School; and, later, an
uncompromising artist in search of a lost
savagery and mysticism in self-imposed
exile in the South Seas.
And what of his paintings? From the
eerily intimate Christ In The Garden Of
Olives (1889), in which Gauguin casts
himself as Christ scurrying away in the
shadows, and the strange, pivotal Vision
Of The Sermon (1888), to his later
enigmatic, sensual, highly contrived
Polynesian pieces, Gauguin`s radical fat
use of colour and subjective responses,
his invoking of poetic narrative and his
fascination with fable and ancient
spirituality liberated late 19th-century
art from the conventions of realism.
'People seem to have dismissed him as
a decorative painter,` says Riding. 'But he
pointed the way to modernism.`
For Riding, the exhibition will reveal
that Gauguin`s Brittany paintings are just
as signifcant as his numinous, somewhat
fantastical and much better-known images
of the fauna, long-vanished folklore and
beautiful young girls of Tahiti.
His glorious Pont-Aven studio is still
there, as is the boarding house he stayed at.
'He was already very interested in
spiritualism and folk culture when he
arrived in Pont-Aven: there`s no schism
between the two periods at all,` says
Riding. 'With his non-European
background [Gauguin`s mother was half-
Peruvian], he felt that primitive peasant
culture was one that he understood.`
Gauguin`s idealised view of women
and poverty, both the French peasants
and the Tahitian natives, pose certain
m||e Bernard
Em||e Bernard trave||ed to Pont-Aven |n
1888, where, w|th Gaugu|n, he was soon
deve|op|ng the theory of synthet|sm -
the use of br|ght fat oo|ours and b|aok
out||nes. Pa|nt|ngs suoh as Pardon At
Pont-Aven, w|th |ts rad|oa| man|pu|at|on of
perspeot|ve and |um|nous
green baokground, show
the oreat|ve oross-po|||nat|on
between the two art|sts. Yet
he was to beoome
|noreas|ng|y resentfu| of
the attent|on d|reoted at
Gaugu|n, at one po|nt
aoous|ng h|m
of p|ag|ar|sm.
Pau| Srus|er
One of the most ausp|o|ous
meet|ngs |n modern art
ooourred between Gaugu|n
and Pau| Serus|er |n 1888, when the |atter
requested a br|ef |esson. Gaugu|n |ed
Serus|er to a tranqu|| spot by the r|ver Aven
and to|d h|m to pa|nt what oo|ours he saw
there. Serus|er's o|ro|e of fe||ow pa|nters,
known as the 'Nab|s', oa||ed the resu|t|ng
and now extreme|y famous pa|nt|ng The
Ta||sman, for what they r|ght|y
oons|dered |ts ground-
break|ng use of abstraot
v|sua| sensat|on.
V|ncent van Gogh
Gaugu|n ||ved w|th van Gogh
(|eft} |n Ar|es for two months |n
|ate 1888 but the arrangement
was a d|saster, part|ou|ar|y for
van Gogh, who found h|mse|f
be||tt|ed by an arrogant
Gaugu|n. ln 2009, two
German art h|stor|ans
proposed that |t was aotua||y
Tuesday, September 28, 2010 o}o
Ga00|n's
7|e /nces|o|s O/
7e|amana, a 13-,ea|-
o|o |o|,nes|an w|o
|e ma|||eo ano |a|e|
|ao a c|||o w|||
Bo f
2u-Seceud aut Sceut te try us?
Net esuIt what we've feuud ouIiue
Gaugu|n who |opped off van Gogh's ear
dur|ng an argument and that van Gogh
kept qu|et |n order to proteot h|m.
Cam|||e P|ssarro
Muoh o|der than Gaugu|n, P|ssarro was a
ga|van|s|ng |nfuenoe on the younger man,
enoourag|ng h|m to beoome a pa|nter |n
the |ate 1870s. The two wou|d |ater dr|ft
apart but Gaugu|n's ear|y |etters to
P|ssarro art|ou|ate some of h|s deve|op|ng
|deas about art, and h|s deepen|ng
oonoerns about money.
Em||e Schuffenecker
W|th Gaugu|n, Em||e Sohuffeneoker he|ped
arrange the 1889 vo|p|n| exh|b|t|on, on the
wa||s of a oafe, as ne|ther they nor the|r
fr|ends had any hope of be|ng aooepted to
exh|b|t at the Par|s Expos|t|on n|verse||e.
nfortunate|y, noth|ng so|d, but Gaugu|n's
vo|p|n| Su|te |s now oons|dered a major
moment |n the art|st's deve|opment. CA
It seems ce|ebr|ty |s mere|y the
means to an end. It's a|| about
becom|ng a money-sp|nn|ng
ber-brand and m||k|ng |t, ||ke
cash cow Kat|e Pr|ce, who |s
un|eash|ng yet another perfume
a|med at Pound|and
pr|ncesses. Now, I tota||y get
why a b|oke m|ght fancy
someone who sme||s of H||ary
Duff, Kate Moss or J-Lo,
hott|es w|th pongs to
pedd|e, but the Pr|cey don't
seem r|ghtyI Anyhow, from
October 25, you too can
douse yourse|f |n Prec|ous
Love (r|ght| 'a tr|bute to
eterna| |ove', someth|ng
she'd know a|| about, as
Peter Andre - who |aunches
Myster|ous G|r| for women
(huh?| tomorrow - w||| te||
you. The |atest Jordan ju|ce
comes |n 'a bott|e that
represents her ||fe' (cheap?
p|ast|c? see-through?| 'w|th a
frosted centre' (you don't sayI|
and 'topped w|th her s|gnature
d|amond cap'. V|ctor|a, Par|s,
Co|een, Chane||e Hayes: what
next? L by Maureen from
Dr|v|ng Schoo|? N|ght Gusset
by Amy W|no?
Keith Barker-Main
interpretative challenges: French women
were unlikely to have worked the felds in
the traditional lace hats Gauguin depicts
them in and Tahitian girls didn`t tend to
languish among the trees semi-naked.
'But he wouldn`t have seen it as exploiting,`
Riding argues. 'For him it was all about
trying to fnd a purity that had been lost.`
By feeding the notion of himself as a
savage and an outsider, Gauguin, in fact,
fts into a long Western tradition of the
artist seeing himself as other. 'His self-
portraits make you think of Rembrandt`s,
while Vision Of The Sermon is very
traditional and yet very modern,` Riding
says. 'He drew on the greats as a way of
moving forward. But there was always
this great confict within him. I look at his
self-portraits and I wonder if there was
ever a point when he was truly happy.`
Ga00|n. /a|e| O/ /,|| ooens a| 7a|e
/ooe|n on 7|0|soa,. www.|a|e.o|.0|
www.junodown|oad.com
Juno Reoords are beh|nd th|s mus|o
s|te where peop|e oan down|oad
var|ous genres of danoe mus|o as
MP3s and WAv f|es. Now users have
an opportun|ty to enter a rem|x
oompet|t|on set up by Pendu|um
(be|ow} and WEA Reoords, |n
assoo|at|on w|th Juno Down|oad and
SoundO|oud, wh|oh g|ves users the
ohanoe to have the|r rem|x vers|on
of Pendu|um's s|ng|e, The ls|and,
re|eased by Warner Bros Reoords.
The w|nner w||| reoe|ve a roya|ty
and a|so oo||eot 500 oash and 150
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Down|oad and SoundO|oud Pro.
Runners-up w||| reoe|ve a 50
vouoher for the two webs|tes.
sers oan down|oad the 13 parts of
the traok then produoe the|r own m|x
of the song and up|oad |t to one of
the two s|tes by Ootober 18.
http://vuzz.com
vuzz.oom tr|es to set |tse|f up as an
a|ternat|ve to other |nternet quest|on-
and-answer s|tes by answer|ng your
quest|ons through users' oharts and
us|ng |t as a way to fnd out what |s
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suoh as 'who |s the best gu|tar|st?',
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other members w||| vote for the|r
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ohart. The s|te a|ms to prov|de a
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www.fr|end|ymus|c.com
W|th th|s s|te, you oan ||sten to mus|o
that matohes your mood by go|ng
through |ts |arge se|eot|on of oho|oes,
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You w||| then be greeted w|th a
se|eot|on of songs ava||ab|e for
purohase and to down|oad. Fr|end|y
Mus|o has an extens|ve oata|ogue of
oopyr|ght-o|eared songs and the s|te
owners say 'the mus|o |s 100 per
oent |ega| for persona| and oustom
on||ne med|a oreat|ons'.
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Staying In DvDReviews
Crazy Cage is
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There are cinematic cops
who play by their own
rules. And then there is
Terence McDonagh.
The crack-smoking, dog-
sitting, iguana-bothering
anti-hero of Werner
Herzog`s reworking of Bad Lieutenant
doesn`t just break all the rules, it`s
never entirely clear if he knows there
are any. That McDonagh is played with
frenzied exuberance by Nicolas Cage
merely adds to the sense of fun. And
make no mistake, this is a fun flm -
possibly the best police comedy since
Beverly Hills Cop. Whether or not it
sets out to be is plainly irrelevant when
the fnished result is this entertaining.
Cage was born to play McDonagh. He
does more here with an arched eyebrow
and those big sad eyes than most actors
manage with their entire bodies. Even
the flm`s alligators can`t take their
eyes off him.
There`s a sub plot about a murder
investigation in New Orleans but it`s
really just background to McDonagh`s
increasingly unpredictable escapades -
highlights include sex with a stranger
in a car park and hilariously holding
a pair of old ladies at gunpoint.
Halfway through, as his character`s
mind becomes more substance-addled,
Cage starts to channel Jimmy Stewart
by way of Richard Nixon, an incredible
gambit that inexplicably pays off.
This is a brilliantly bizarre picture that
somehow makes perfect sense.
Extras: Interviews, making-of.
Ross McGuinness
Arguab|y the most oontrovers|a| f|m of the
year, th|s |atest provooat|on from d|reotor
M|ohae| W|nterbottom (9 Songs} pu||s no
punohes - ||tera||y. Fa|thfu||y adapted from
J|m Thompson's 1952 pu|p fot|on, wh|oh
Stan|ey Kubr|ok desor|bed as 'the most
oh||||ng and be||evab|e frst-person story
of a or|m|na||y warped m|nd l have ever
enoountered', |t's the story of |ou Ford
(an Osoar-worthy Oasey Affeok}. |ou's a
deputy sher|ff |n a sma|| Texan town who
h|des a sadomasooh|st|o oompu|s|on to
k||| beneath h|s boy-next-door exter|or.
H|s v|ot|ms are the women he |oves
(Jess|oa A|ba and Kate Hudson}, who he
mero||ess|y beats to a b|oody mess. lt's a
nasty watoh on that |eve| a|one but more
d|sturb|ng |s the |aok of pat exp|anat|on
offered for Ford's aot|ons, part|ou|ar|y
s|noe he's a|so oapab|e of warmth and
tenderness. lt |sn't the sensat|ona|
v|o|enoe or the 'w||| they oatoh h|m?'
suspense but the mystery of Ford's
make-up that oompe|s you to watoh -
even when you don't want to.
Extras: Beh|nd the soenes, oast
|nterv|ews. Larushka Ivan-Zadeh
When one of comed|an Chr|s Rock's
young daughters asked h|m: 'How
come I don't have good ha|r?' |t set
h|m off on a quest to understand the
cu|ture of b|ack ha|r. The resu|t|ng
documentary |s a fasc|nat|ng |ook at
what's dr|v|ng the mu|t|-b||||on-do||ar
|ndustry prov|d|ng ha|r products to
b|ack Amer|cans. From re|axer
(known as 'creamy crack'| to weaves
and extens|ons, b|ack women are
buy|ng |nto contorted |deas of beauty
and conform|ty - someth|ng qu|te
frank|y d|scussed by a |ot of Rock's
|nterv|ewees. H|s genu|ne |nterest
and wry w|t e||c|t great anecdotes
from those he encounters, |nc|ud|ng
the or|g|ns of the Rev A| Sharpton's
re|axed ha|r and rapper Pepa's
asymmetr|ca| cut. Meanwh||e, h|s
|nvest|gat|ons take h|m from a sty||st
face-off at the Bronner Bros ha|r
show |n At|anta, to New York barber
shops, and to the re||g|ous tonsure
ceremon|es |n Ind|a, wh|ch prov|de
the raw mater|a| for $1,000 weaves.
Extras: None. Siobhan Murphy

oddbaII Lheices
fer Sefa Leafers
1he Iamous Iive: Iive Un A
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Most of the 21 Famous Five novels
by Enid Blyton have made the transfer
to the screen, the frst of which was
this one from the Children`s Film
Foundation, realised in 1957 and
based on Blyton`s frst Famous Five
novel from 1942. Here, it`s adapted
into eight easily digestible episodes,
and its well-cast, plummy-voiced
child stars throw themselves with
gusto into an action-packed
adventure that takes in the usual array
of castles, coves, treasure, secret
dungeons, inept baddies and lashings
of derring-do. For those who want to
relive more of a childhood swept away
by the books` breathless excitement,
the CFF`s Five Have A Mystery To
Solve, featuring a different crop of
child (and canine) actors playing
Julian, Dick, George, Anne and
Timmy the dog, is also out now.
Extras: None. Sharon Lougher
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The incredibly
smooth Daniel
Proietto and two
female dancers
perform AfterLight, with music
that incorporates Erik Satie's
Gnossiennes
7on||| ano |omo||ow, 5ao|e|'s
He||s, 7.30om, 10 |o 25.
7e|. 0811 112 1300. 70oe. /ne|
THEATRE
UNTlTLED
Magical realism
about identical
twins who are
separated at
birth, by rising
performance
poetry star lnua Ellams
7on||| 0n||| Oc| 9, 5o|o 7|ea||e,
/on |o 5a| 7.30om, .a||o0s ma|s
3om, 10 |o 20. 7e|. 020 7178
0100. 70oe. 7o||en|am Co0||
|oao/||ccao|||, C||c0s
uIu
AN EVENlNC
FDR LDBl
Tribute gig to
Malian guitarist
Lobi Traor, who
died in June,
whose rootsy,
refective Rainy Season Blues is
posthumously released. All
proceeds go to his family
7on|||, 5c|oo| O/ O||en|a| /no
//||can 5|0o|es JC|, 8om, 10.
7e|. 020 8959 9822.
www.|ones||ons.com 70oe. |0sse||
5q0a|e/Goooe 5||ee|
CLADlATDRlAL DETRY
5LAM
The Museum Of London's youth
panel, Junction, presents live
poetry performance battles,
focusing on the Roman infuence
on the capital.
7on|||, /0se0m O/ |onoon,
5.30om. 7e|. 020 7001 9811.
70oe. 5| |a0|'s/Sa|o|can
LoWboW FoR FR
6i Uuterindia: SusheeIa Raman + 6uests
Some vocalists don`t need
fancy embellishment to create
fantastically rich atmospheres
and British Tamil vocalist/
musician Susheela Raman is
a case in point. Raman was
Mercury-nominated for her
2001 album, Salt Rain, and has
built on her loyal following
with multilingual original
compositions that breezily
traverse jazz, soul, rock and
roots territory, as well as artful
reinterpretations of indie, funk
and industrial classics, from
the likes of Joy Division, Jimi
Hendrix and Throbbing
Gristle. On record, Raman`s
gorgeously earthy, sensual tones
are most effectively backed
with acoustic instrumentation,
sleekly blending Western and
Indian classical styles; catch
her live, though, and she really
bristles with seductive energy.
Raman presented her
Outerindia gig project to
acclaim last year and here she
launches a monthly residency
at Rich Mix: a convivial East
London space that works best
presenting multimedia events.
Tonight`s guest artists include
Asian Dub Foundation co-
founder and bassist Dr Das
(performing with Bantu and
Ramjac) and Bengali dubki
percussionist Paban Das Baul.
Writer (and Das Baul`s 'musical
accomplice`) Mimlu Sen reads
from her latest music travelogue,
The Honey Gatherers, and
there`s also a screening of
Sadia Shepard`s short
documentary, In The Courtyard
Of The Beloved, which depicts
Delhi`s historic Nizamuddin
Awliya Suf shrine. There`s a
lot of ground to cover but, with
Raman at the helm, Outerindia
promises to highlight
international music connections
and blaze excitingly expressive
new trails. Arwa Haider
7on|||, ||c| /|x, 5om, 8 ao.,
11 ooo|. 7e| 020 7513 7198.
|a||. 5|o|eo||c| ||| 5||ee|
1heatre eview Yes, rime Hinister )))**
'I don`t know what else I don`t know,`
says David Haig`s brow-mopping PM
Jim Hacker (pictured) to Henry
Goodman`s sleekly superior Sir
Humphrey. 'Do you know?` It`s lines
such as these that keep afoat Jonathan
Lynn and Antony Jay`s loving stage
version of their successful 1980s TV
series, in which Hacker endures a
particularly disastrous weekend at
Chequers as leader of a querulous
coalition government in the middle of
a catastrophic debt crisis.
Turning a half-hour TV show into a
two-and-a-half-hour play is no mean
feat and a fair percentage of this, in
which Hacker, among other things, is
frantically trying to secure a $10trillion
oil deal with Kumranistan, depends on
a lot of artifcially generated plot. By
focusing on the politics of desperate
survival, Lynn and his mostly excellent
cast make a virtue of these more
farcical elements; nonetheless, a
certain dramatic strain and a crudely
provocative story involving an
underage prostitute make this still-
resonant satire feel more laboured
than it should.
Goodman silkily gets his tongue
around Sir Humphrey`s impenetrable
speeches but occasionally overeggs the
pudding. Haig, on the other hand, turns
overegging into an art form as he
pivots between pugilistic bravado and
utter panic, while Jonathan Slinger is
delicious as a dweeby, privately
tormented Bernard. And Yes, Prime
Minister`s skewering of the moral
expediency of government is as adept
as ever. Not quite vintage, then, but
still full-bodied enough to make
Cameron and co wonder if it might be
based on them. Claire Allfree
Un||| Jan 15, G|e|0o 7|ea||e, /on |o
5a| 7.30om, Heo ano 5a| ma|s 2.30om,
12.50 |o 52.50. 7e|. 0870 9500 915.
70oe. ||ccao|||, C||c0s
Volatile impresario Serge Diaghilev
presided over a radical ballet company
that left the upheavals of pre-revolutionary
Russia to settle in Western Europe. The
collaborative mastermind - variously
described as an ogre, a paternal benefactor
and a genius - drew talent towards him
with the gravitational pull of a neutron
star and his Ballets Russes became a focal
point for artistic innovation.
Featuring rarely shown V&A stock as
well as spectacular loan items, this
exhibition offers a feast of ballet
ephemera, ranging from Jean Cocteau`s
huge art deco posters to costumes by
Coco Chanel. Lon Bakst`s bejewelled
costume sketches are exquisite works
of art, particularly the iconic design for
legendary dancer (and Diaghilev`s one-
time lover) Vaslav Nijinsky in LÀprs-
midi dùn Faune.
The climax is Pablo Picasso`s vividly
hued front cloth for Le Train Bleu, the
largest single object owned by the
museum. The exhibition successfully
deconstructs the disparate elements of
performance, showcasing jerky footage of
ballerina Tamara Karsavina and piping
stirring music from composers such as
Debussy and Prokofev.
This multi-disciplinary approach and the
atmospheric design of the galleries, darkly
lit like the backstage of a theatre, means
there is little chance of developing
museum fatigue, even though the
exhibition packs in a lot of material.
Now seen as pivotal in the development
of modernism, the Ballets Russes 1913
Paris premiere of The Rite Of Spring
inspired riots and fghts in the aisles. This
show not only offers artistic treats but
conveys a real sense of the company`s
brutal discipline, furious creative energy
and lasting artistic legacy. Amy Dawson
Un||| Jan 9, v8/, oa||, 10am |o 5.15om
(F|| |o 10om, 10. 7e|. 020 7907 7073.
www..am.ac.0| 70oe. 5o0|| |ens|n|on
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DCI Banks: Aftermath, ITV1
luside 1he 8ex what keith watson SawLast Night
There must be suburban streets where
the local art teacher isn`t a serial killer,
the Neighbourhood Watch group isn`t
a cover for a paedophile ring and
the meals-on-wheels lady isn`t a
transvestite drugs mule. But thank
your lucky stars if you live on one -
TV detective dramas are on a mission
to convince us there`s a psychopath
lurking on every corner.
Actually, only the art teacher/serial
killer turned up on DCI Banks:
Aftermath (ITV1) but this was a tale
cut from over-familiar cloth: outwardly
respectable bloke turns out to be a
nutcase who slaughters young blonde
girls and stacks them up in his cellar.
The twist being that we joined the case
when it was all but over, leaving the
way clear for Stephen Tompkinson to
mope around like a lame puppy for an
hour, wailing 'woe is me`. Forget the
puppy reference, that would have been
sad: this was just boring.
Tompkinson is DCI Alan Banks and
he`s in a grump because he thinks he`s a
failure. We know this because he keeps
saying: 'I`ve failed.` That`s down to the
fact he didn`t catch the crazy art teacher
in time, so now he`s haunted by the
image of the dead blonde victims, who
look distractingly like a girl band off
The X-Factor. To make matters worse,
there`s an ambitious young detective
(blonde, naturally) investigating why
he`s so rubbish at his job.
It`s all effciently done but there have
been so many stories scraped off the
sleazy underbelly of human nature that
it`s hard to feel anything but numb.
As soon as the fresh-faced young PC
cracked a joke in the opening scene it
was a fair guess he`d end up a bloody
mess on the end of a machete. The most
shocking scene was the one where
Banks looked set to cop off with Miss
Investigator (even though, natch, they
hated each other`s guts). Now that was
genuinely creepy.
We`re only halfway through the story,
because Banks sniffs redemption in
the fact there`s a missing girl still
unaccounted for. But forgive me if
I throw in the blood-spattered towel,
I`ve got serial-killer fatigue.
I`ve got a lot of time for Dave Gorman.
America Unchained, in which he
attempted to cross the US using only
independent hotels/garages etc, was an
inspired subversion of the travelogue
genre. So it`s hard not to feel he`s
wasting himself on formula panel show
Gen|us W|th Dave Gorman (BBC2).
Proving simple ideas are not always
the best ones, Genius. gets the
audience to suggest daft ideas and the
guests decide if they`re genius. So you
get sky-diving dolphins, soup ice lollies
and so on. It had Russell Howard on -
because that`s panel-game law - but it`s
a long way off genius, just an average
night`s daft banter down the pub.
6ive us A8reak LommerciaI Sense Ur Ad
Nauseam? 1oday: 1ackpot[oy.com
Forgetting I`d left the TV on down the hall, when I frst heard
this ad`s soundtrack, I feared a kookaburra had invaded my
sitting room. Closer inspection revealed the horrendous
cackle as none other than that of Peggy Mitchell risen,
phoenix-like, from the ashes of the burned-out Queen Vic to
be crowned the queen of bingo in a skit that recalls ancient
variety show The Good Old Days. It seems the people`s
pearly queen has hit the jackpot. Released from her BBC
contract, the 'national treasure` can fnally afford a wig that
looks, oh, about 15 per cent real rather than those hideous
acrylic haystacks the game old bird sweated under while
tending to her brood in Walford. Keith Barker-Main
1eIevision what 1o watch
Gen|us W|th Dave Gorman, BBC2
Match the ems pIayin BejeweIed te waIk away with 20,000
Gc\Xj\ gcXp i\jgfej`Ycp% M`j`k nnn%^XdYc\XnXi\%Zf%lb% GcXp\ij dljk Y\ fm\i (/%
Reister teday
and we'II bouBL
yeur rst depesit
over S00,000 ef prizes up fer rabs
at www.Marcade.ce.uk
1ry eut
BejeweIed
fer free
tedayl
6.00 OBeeb|es 7.00 OBBO S.S0
OBeeb|es 11.S0 Open Gardens
(R,T,W} v|s|ts to Br|sto| and
Staffordsh|re. 12.00 Da||y Po||t|os
Oonferenoe Speo|a| (T,W} Ooverage
of the |abour party oonferenoe.
1.00 An|ma| Park (R,T,W} The
park's o|dest t|ger has an
emergenoy operat|on. 2.00 Da||y
Po||t|os Oonferenoe Speo|a| (T,W}
The oonferenoe speeoh by the
|abour party's new |eader. 4.00
F|og lt! (T,W} From Buxton |n
Derbysh|re. 4.S0 Po|nt|ess (T,W}
Hosted by A|exander Armstrong
and R|ohard Osman. 5.15 Esoape
To The Oountry (T,W} Jonn|e lrw|n
he|ps a ooup|e searoh|ng for a
property |n Ohesh|re, and shows
them a former pottery, wh|oh boasts
an open-p|an 800sq ft ||v|ng room.
6.00 Eggheads (T,W} Ou|z,
hosted by Dermot Murnaghan.
6.S0 CIimbing Great
BuiIdings (T,W} Jonathan
Foy|e and |uoy Oreamer soa|e
the lmper|a| War Museum North
|n Manohester, d|soover|ng how
the struoture was des|gned to
refeot the ohaos of war |tse|f.
|ast |n the ser|es.
7.00 The CIassroom
Experiment (T,W} Part two of
two. Professor Dy|an W|||am
tr|es to get the pup||s to aot
more respons|b|y by mon|tor|ng
the|r behav|our, but some
oh||dren are not respond|ng we||
to h|s methods.
S.00 MasterChef: The
ProfessionaIs (T,W} E|ght
oompet|tors prepare w||d
mushrooms and fresh sard|nes
before the rema|n|ng ohefs are
oha||enged to rep||oate two
reo|pes demonstrated by
M|ohe| Roux Jr.
9.00 Whites (T,W} New ser|es.
See Today's Tv.
9.S0 Harry & PauI (T,W} New
ser|es. Sketoh oomedy w|th
Harry Enfe|d and Pau|
Wh|tehouse.
10.00 Later Live ~ With
JooIs HoIIand (T,W} Jazz funk
group Jam|roqua|, s|nger KT
Tunsta||, |nd|e bands De|ta Sp|r|t
and Everyth|ng Everyth|ng, and
fo|k-rook aot Ray |amontagne
& the Par|ah Dogs perform |n
the stud|o.
10.S0 Newsnight (T,W}
FoIIowed by Weather
11.20 Today At Conference
(T,W} H|gh||ghts from the
|abour party oonferenoe |n
Manohester's o|ty oentre,
|no|ud|ng ooverage of the new
party |eader's speeoh.
11.50 Highgrove: AIan
Meets Prince CharIes
(R,T,W} A|an T|tohmarsh
exp|ores the H|ghgrove estate.
12.50 BBO News (T} 4.S5 O|ose
6.00 M||kshake! 9.15 The Wr|ght
Stuff (T} Matthew Wr|ght and guests
ta|k about the |ssues of the day.
10.45 Tr|sha Goddard (R,T} A
mother-of-three who works as a
dom|natr|x at n|ght. 11.45 House
(R,T} An A|ds pat|ent exh|b|ts
strange symptoms. 12.40 F|ve
News (T} 12.45 Po||oe lnteroeptors
(R,T} Offoers raoe to br|ng three
burg|ars to just|oe. 1.45
Ne|ghbours (T} 2.15 Home And
Away (T} Ange|o |s foroed to fre lnd|.
2.50 Mea|s ln Moments (T} W|th
2008 Oe|ebr|ty MasterOhef w|nner
||z Mo|arnon. S.05 FlLM:
Picking Up And Dropping Off
(2003} (T} Romant|o oomedy, w|th
Soott Wo|f and Amanda Detmer.
5.00 F|ve News, Weather (T} 5.S0
Ne|ghbours (R,T}
6.00 Home And Away (R,T}
Ange|o |s foroed to fre lnd| after
be|ng put under pressure by
Ohar||e. |eah oonfronts Ruby
over the a|ooho| |no|dent, and
||am apo|og|ses to an upset
B|anoa.
6.25 Live From Studio Five
(T} Top|oa| reports.
7.00 Five News At 7 (T}
7.S0 How To Take Stunning
Pictures (T} Profess|ona|
|andsoape photographer
Ohar||e Wa|te adv|ses a free
runner and a p|asterer on ways
to |mprove the|r p|otures.
Presented by Suz| Perry.
FoIIowed by Five News
Update
S.00 Nature Shock: The
SeaI Ripper (T} So|ent|sts are
baffed when mut||ated sea|
oorpses wash ashore on a
remote At|ant|o |s|and, foro|ng
them to re-eva|uate a seem|ng|y
p|ao|d speo|es of shark. |ast |n
the ser|es. FoIIowed by Five
News At 9
9.00 CSl: Miami (T} Pop star
Phoebe N|oho|s reported|y
burns to death on stage, but
ana|ys|s of the rema|ns revea|s
that a doub|e d|ed |n her p|aoe,
|eav|ng Horat|o w|th a baff|ng
mystery to so|ve. Or|me drama,
starr|ng Dav|d Oaruso.
10.00 CSl: NY (R,T} Ste||a
fnds a d|sorepanoy at a murder
soene that |mp||oates a d|str|ot
attorney |n a d|fferent or|me -
but her determ|nat|on to pursue
h|m resu|ts |n a k|||er be|ng
re|eased. Or|me drama, starr|ng
Me||na Kanakaredes.
FoIIowed by Five News
Update
11.00 CSl: Crime Scene
lnvestigation (R,T} A murder
tr|a| drags on for seven weeks,
oaus|ng tempers to fray among
the jury. F|na||y, the on|y
d|ssent|ng member |s k|||ed -
and susp|o|on |nev|tab|y fa||s on
the other 11.
11.55 NClS (R,T} A Mus||m
Mar|ne |s found dead.
12.50 SuperOas|no 4.05 Po||oe
lnteroeptors (R,T} Offoers raoe to
br|ng three burg|ars to just|oe. 4.55
An|ma| Resoue Squad (R,T} 5.10
The New Tomorrow (R,T} The
Stranger returns to the oamp. 5.S5
to 6.00 M|ohae|a's W||d Oha||enge
(R,T} Monkey mov|e-makers |n
South Afr|oa.
6.00 Breakfast (T,W} 9.15
He||oopter Heroes (T,W} 10.00
Homes nder The Hammer (R,T,W}
fo||owed by BBO News 11.00 F||thy
Rotten Sooundre|s (T,W} 11.45
Oash ln The Att|o (R,T,W} Ra|s|ng
money for a ho||day |n Turkey.
fo||owed by BBO News 12.15
Barga|n Hunt (T,W} Two a||-ma|e
teams oompete at Portobe||o
Market |n |ondon. 1.00 BBO
News, Weather (T,W} 1.S0 Reg|ona|
News And Weather (T,W} 1.45
Dootors (T,W} Oherry's yoga o|ass
prov|des an opportun|ty to p|ay
matohmaker. 2.15 D|agnos|s
Murder (R,T} Jaok goes underoover
at a dat|ng agenoy. S.00 BBO
News, Weather, Reg|ona| News
(T,W} S.05 OBBO 5.15 Weakest
||nk (T,W} Genera| know|edge qu|z.
6.00 BBC News (T,W}
Fo||owed by Weather
6.S0 RegionaI News
Programmes (T,W} Fo||owed
by Weather
7.00 The One Show (T,W}
Top|oa| stor|es w|th Jason
Manford and A|ex Jones.
7.S0 EastEnders (T,W}
Jan|ne sets about tak|ng
revenge on Ryan and Staoey.
FoIIowed by BBC News;
RegionaI News
S.00 HoIby City (T,W} M|ohae|
|s pushed over the edge when
he hears R|o |s mov|ng |n w|th
Anna|ese, p|ao|ng h|m |n
Oonn|e's ||ne of fre, and Joseph
|s foroed to eat humb|e p|e after
underm|n|ng Greg.
9.00 The Secrets Of
ScientoIogy (T,W} John
Sweeney oonduots a seoond
|nvest|gat|on |nto the Ohuroh of
So|ento|ogy, ga|n|ng an |ns|der's
v|ew of the organ|sat|on and |ts
more o|ose|y guarded seorets.
10.00 BBC News (T,W}
10.25 RegionaI News And
Weather (T,W}
10.S5 My Story (T,W} George
A|ag|ah hears the ta|es of
peop|e who tr|umphed over
advers|ty, |no|ud|ng a woman
who suffered years of neg|eot
at an |ndustr|a| sohoo| |n
lre|and.
11.05 lnside Sport (T,W}
11.S5 FlLM: The Greatest
Game Ever PIayed {2005)
(T,W} A determ|ned Amer|oan
work|ng-o|ass go|fer overoomes
soo|a| prejud|oe and oyn|o|sm
to oompete |n the 1913 S
Open. Drama, starr|ng Sh|a
|aBeouf. FoIIowed by
Weatherview
1.S5 See Hear (R,T,W} 2.05
D|gg|ng For Br|ta|n (R,T,W} Rare
artefaots found |n Happ|sburgh,
Norfo|k. S.05 Natura| Wor|d (R,T,W}
The ||fe and |egaoy of Eoho the
e|ephant. 4.05 Br|ta|n's Empty
Homes (R,T,W} A ooup|e |ook for a
spao|ous property. 4.S5 to 6.00
BBO News (T}
88LI 88L2 l1VI L4 LhauueI S
Wh|tes, BBC2, 9pm
1eday's 1Vwith Sharon Lougher
&Larushka Ivan2adeh
ick of 1he bay whites 88C2, 9pm
BeIl My Beuse ls faIIiu bewu C4, 8pm
eieuaI variatieus
AngIia As lTv exoept 1.55-2.00
Ang||a News S.59-4.00 Ang||a
Weather 6.00-6.S0 Ang||a
Ton|ght, Weather 10.S0-10.S5
Ang||a News, Weather Border As
lTv exoept 1.55-2.00 Tyne Tees
and Border News S.59-4.00
Border Weather 6.00-6.S0
|ookaround, Weather 10.S0-
10.S5 |ookaround, Weather
CarIton As lTv exoept 1.55-2.00
|ondon News S.59-4.00 |ondon
Weather 6.00-6.S0 |ondon
|ondon News, Weather CentraI
As lTv exoept 1.55-2.00 |ooa|
News S.59-4.00 |ooa| Weather
6.00-6.S0 Oentra| Ton|ght,
Weather 10.S0-10.S5 |ooa|
News, Weather Granada As lTv
exoept 1.55-2.00 Granada News
S.59-4.00 Granada Weather
6.00-6.S0 Granada Reports,
Weather 10.S0-10.S5 Granada
News, Weather Meridian As lTv
exoept 1.55-2.00 Mer|d|an News
S.59-4.00 Mer|d|an Weather
6.00-6.S0 Mer|d|an Ton|ght,
Weather 10.S0-10.S5 Mer|d|an
Ton|ght, Weather Tyne Tees As
lTv exoept 1.55-2.00 Tyne Tees
and Border News S.59-4.00
North East Weather 6.00-6.S0
North East Ton|ght, Weather
10.S0-10.S5 North East Ton|ght,
Weather West As lTv exoept
1.55-2.00 The West Oountry
Today S.59-4.00 lTv West
Weather 6.00-6.S0 West Oountry
West Oountry Ton|ght, Weather
Westcountry As lTv exoept
1.55-2.00 West Oountry Today
S.59-4.00 Westoountry Weather
6.00-6.S0 West Oountry Ton|ght,
Weather 10.S0-10.S5 West
Oountry Ton|ght, Weather
Yorkshire As lTv exoept 1.55-
2.00 Oa|endar News S.59-4.00
|ooa| Weather 6.00-6.S0
Oa|endar, Weather 10.S0-10.S5
Oa|endar News, Weather
He`s a versatile man, is Alan Davies. He plays the
fool in QI, a magician/detective in Jonathan Creek
and has just relived his revolutionary teen years for
documentary purposes. For this new sitcom he`s in
actorly mode again, playing a hotel head chef called
Roland White - any relation to Marco Pierre? - who
goes against the grain of the highly stressed Gordon
Ramsays of this world by being a bit of a slacker.
Also stars Katherine Parkinson (The IT Crowd) and
Isy Suttie (Dobby from Peep Show).
It would be hard to top the catalogue of disasters that
befell Terry and Mandy`s 16-bedroom pile last week.
Still, Vicky and James from Staines have a go:
they`ve got a four-bedroom house that`s cracking and
bending so much that Sarah Beeny can`t fgure out
what`s actually holding it up at all. Plus they`ve got
dodgy pipes. As usual, Beeny has some clever
technology on hand to solve the problems. Last in
the series.
A 1ime 1e emember 88C4, 8.30pm
A Time To Remember was originally a Path series
from the 1950s which, using archive footage and
narrated by prominent actors of the day, looked at
the political, social and cultural changes of the frst
half of the 20th century. Now that material has been
collected thematically, with this second episode
focusing on theatres, music halls and cinemas during
the golden age of the 1920s and 1930s.
fiIm of 1he bay LeutreI lilm4, IIpm
Sam Riley is electrifying as visionary Joy Division
frontman Ian Curtis in this award-winning black-
and-white 2007 biopic. Even if you`re not bothered
about the music, it`s a gripping story as the
increasingly epilepsy-prone Curtis is torn apart by
his love for two women (Samantha Morton and
Alexandra Maria Lara). Exquisitely shot by former
rock photographer Anton Corbijn.
Listings Key. R - Repeat, T - Text, W - Widescreen, M Picks Of The Day, M Fi|ms
6.00 Daybreak (T,W} S.S0 |orra|ne
(T,W} 9.25 The Jeremy Ky|e Show
(T,W} 10.S0 Th|s Morn|ng (T,W}
Sharon Marsha|| goes beh|nd the
soenes at the lns|de Soap Awards.
12.S0 |oose Women (T,W} 1.S0
lTv News And Weather (T,W} 1.55
Reg|ona| News (T,W} 2.00 60
M|nute Makeover (T,W} A home
transformat|on |n Ohe|mer v|||age,
Essex. S.00 Seoret Dea|ers (T,W}
The ant|ques experts v|s|t
homeowners |n Shropsh|re. S.59
Reg|ona| Weather (T,W} 4.00
M|dsomer Murders (R,T,W} Part two
of two. Barnaby and Troy oont|nue
the|r |nvest|gat|on. 5.00 The A|an
T|tohmarsh Show (T,W} W|th
Rosemary Shrager, vanessa Fe|tz
and N|ok Ferrar|, p|us mus|o by
Status Ouo.
6.00 RegionaI News (T,W}
Fo||owed by Weather
6.S0 lTV News And
Weather (T,W}
7.00 EmmerdaIe (T,W} Ab|
and Ryan oome dangerous|y
o|ose to oross|ng the ||ne.
7.S0 Grimehghters (R,T,W}
A woman |s found to have four
tons of rubb|sh |n her bedroom,
and a b|ookage at a sewage
stat|on |eaves a o|ean-up team
w|th a d|rty job on |ts hands.
S.00 New Who Wants To
Be A MiIIionaire? (T,W} Ohr|s
Tarrant hosts the b|g-pr|ze qu|z,
|n wh|oh oontestants must now
answer quest|ons aga|nst the
o|ook and are g|ven a new
||fe||ne at the 50,000 mark as
they try to w|n 1m||||on.
9.00 71 Degrees North
(T,W} The seven rema|n|ng
oe|ebr|t|es h|ke through deep
snow up to a sheer o||ff faoe,
before spend|ng a n|ght |n tents
preoar|ous|y seoured to the
vert|oa| drop w|th o||mb|ng
ropes.
10.00 lTV News At Ten And
Weather (T,W}
10.S0 RegionaI News (T,W}
10.S5 Swingtown (T,W} The
Deokers are |nv|ted to Susan
and Bruoe's oab|n after the
Thompsons deo||ne to go, but
the oosy foursome are shooked
by the |ast-m|nute appearanoe
of Janet and Roger.
11.25 Ladette To Lady
(R,T,W} Mrs Harbord
announoes a zero to|eranoe
po||oy on bad behav|our as the
|adettes host a masked ba|| for
an lta||an pr|noe, but a
sausage-mak|ng |esson oauses
uproar among the g|r|s.
12.25 The Zone (W} Shopp|ng and
|nteraot|ve gam|ng, presented by
M|ohae| nderwood and Ange|||oa
Be||. 2.S0 The Rookford F||es (R,T}
J|m fnds h|mse|f on a k|||er's h|t-||st.
James Garner stars. S.25 The
Jeremy Ky|e Show (R,T,W} 4.20 lTv
N|ghtsoreen 5.S0 to 6.00 lTv
Morn|ng News (T,W}
6.10 The Hoobs (R,T} 6.S5 The
Hoobs (R,T} 7.00 Fresh|y Squeezed
7.S0 Everybody |oves Raymond
(R,T} 7.55 Everybody |oves
Raymond (R,T} S.25 Fras|er (R,T}
S.55 Fr|ends (R,T} 9.S0 |akes On
A P|ate (R,T} 10.00 The Good W|fe
(R,T} 11.00 Desperate Housew|ves
(R,T} 12.00 Ohanne| 4 News
Summary (T} 12.05 Jam|e At Home
(R,T} 12.S0 FlLM: Madame X
(1966} (T} Drama, w|th |ana Turner.
2.20 |akes On A P|ate (T} 2.55
Wogan's Perfeot Reoa|| (T} S.25
Oountdown (T} 4.10 Dea| Or No
Dea| (T} Game show, w|th Noe|
Edmonds. 5.00 Oome D|ne W|th
Me (T} Wr|ter lan B|aok hosts the
seoond d|nner party |n G|asgow.
5.S0 Ooaoh Tr|p (T} The group
arr|ves |n Oopenhagen, Denmark.
6.00 The Simpsons (T}
Marge |oses a|| memory of
Homer.
6.S0 HoIIyoaks (T} |eanne |s
jea|ous when |ee offers Amy a
ro|e |n h|s p|ay, Jasm|ne swears
An|ta to seoreoy about her
doub|e ||fe, and Brendan te||s
Oarme| what he rea||y th|nks of
her.
7.00 ChanneI 4 News (T}
7.55 4thought.tv (T}
Psyohotherap|st Harr|et
Go|denberg d|sousses how her
fa|th offered no oonso|at|on
when she d|soovered she was
|nfert||e, and ta|ks about her
deo|s|on to adopt a oh||d from
Oh|na.
S.00 HeIpI My House ls
FaIIing Down (T} |ast |n the
ser|es. See Today's Tv.
9.00 Ramsay's Best
Restaurant (T} Gordon
Ramsay exam|nes the M|ohe||n-
starred Ka| |n |ondon and
B|rm|ngham's renowned Yu &
You as he turns the spot||ght on
Br|ta|n's Oh|nese restaurants.
10.00 This ls EngIand 'S6
(T} Woody puts as|de h|s
d|fferenoes w|th |o|, |ead|ng
h|m to be||eve he |s ready to
marry her. Meanwh||e, Shaun
and Sme|| fna||y get together,
and Oombo gets a ohanoe to
do someth|ng tru|y hero|o.
Drama, starr|ng v|oky MoO|ure,
Joe G||gun and Thomas
Turgoose. |ast |n the ser|es.
11.05 Seven Days (R,T}
Dooumentary deta|||ng the da||y
||ves of a var|ety of peop|e |n
Nott|ng H|||, |no|ud|ng a
ha|rdresser, a rapper and two
mode|s.
12.10 3 M|nute Wonder 12.15
Poker 1.15 vo||eyba|| 2.10 Box|ng
(T} 2.S5 Superb|ke S.00 Formu|a
Ford Ohamp|onsh|p (R,T} S.25 The
Gr|d (R,T} S.55 Wor|d Sport (R,T}
4.20 GT Aoademy (R,T} 4.45 Br|ef
Enoounters Of The Sport|ng M|nd
(R,T} 5.00 Age Of |ove (R,T} 5.45
to 6.10 Yo Gabba Gabba (R,T}
o}o Tuesday, September 28, 2010
1eIevision DigitaI & LabIe Listings Key. M = Freeview
utertaiumeut
M BBC3
7.0pm Tota| W|peout S.0
Oherry Goes Dat|ng 9.0
Don't Te|| The Br|de 10.0
EastEnders 10.30 ldea| 11.0
Fam||y Guy 11.50 Don't Te||
The Br|de 12.45am B|zarre
ER 1.45 ldea| 2.15 Tota|
W|peout 3.15 EastEnders: Kat
And A|fe's Return 4.15 Oherry
Goes Dat|ng 5.15 O|ose
M BBC4
7.0pm Wor|d News Today
7.30 lt's On|y A Theory S.0
Br|ta|n's Best Dr|ves S.30
A T|me To Remember 9.0
The Born Free |egaoy 10.0
E|sa The ||oness 10.30
Reputat|ons 11.25 A T|me To
Remember 11.55 The Born
Free |egaoy 12.55am Murder
On The |ake 2.25 A T|me To
Remember 2.55 The Born
Free |egaoy 3.55 O|ose
M lTV2
6.0am Ooronat|on Street
6.50 Emmerda|e 7.15 |oose
Women S.10 Sa||y Jessy
Raphae| 9.0 Judge Judy 9.25
The P|anet's Funn|est An|ma|s
10.0 ||fe's Funn|est Moments
10.35 Judge Judy 12.0noon
Ooronat|on Street 1.0pm
Emmerda|e 1.30 The Jeremy
Ky|e Show 3.40 |oose
Women 4.40 Sa||y Jessy
Raphae| 5.30 Judge Judy
7.0 A|| Star Fam||y Fortunes
7.45 P|x|e |ott: The Hot Desk
S.0 What Kat|e D|d Next 9.0
FlLM: Miss CongeniaIity
2: Armed And FabuIous
(2005} Oomedy seque|,
starr|ng Sandra Bu||ook. 11.20
FlLM: Troy (2004} 2.20am
Emmerda|e 2.45 Te|eshopp|ng
5.45 lTv2 N|ghtsoreen
M lTV3
6.0am The Agatha
Ohr|st|e Hour 6.55 Home
To Roost 7.30 Heartbeat
S.30 psta|rs, Downsta|rs
9.40 lrons|de 10.40 Duty
Free 11.15 Kavanagh OO
12.55pm Heartbeat 1.55
Monaroh Of The G|en 3.0
psta|rs, Downsta|rs 4.15
Da||y Oooks Oha||enge 5.15
Duty Free 5.50 Heartbeat
6.50 Monaroh Of The G|en
S.0 Rosemary & Thyme
9.0 The Peop|e's Deteot|ve
10.0 Foy|e's War 12.05am
F|ashpo|nt 1.0 Numb3rs 1.50
Duty Free 2.20 F||m F||e 2.30
Te|eshopp|ng
M lTV4
6.0am F||m F||e 6.10 The
Ohamp|ons 7.0 Randa|| And
Hopk|rk (Deoeased} 7.50 The
Sa|nt S.50 The Profess|ona|s
9.50 The Ohamp|ons
10.55 Randa|| And Hopk|rk
(Deoeased} 11.55 The Sa|nt
12.55pm The Sweeney 2.0
The Pr|soner 3.0 Randa||
And Hopk|rk (Deoeased} 4.0
The Sa|nt 5.0 Motorsport K
6.0 Wor|d's W||dest Po||oe
v|deos 7.0 Po||oe, Oamera,
Aot|on! S.0 Surv|va| W|th Ray
Mears 9.0 FlLM: Ned KeIIy
(2003} 11.15 FlLM: Event
Horizon (1997} 1.10am
Po||oe, Oamera, Aot|on! 2.05
Wor|d's W||dest Po||oe v|deos
2.55 lTv4 N|ghtsoreen 3.0
Te|eshopp|ng
M E4
6.0am Heart|and 6.50
Desperate Housew|ves 7.35
The H|||s S.0 veron|oa Mars
S.55 Heart|and 9.55 Fr|ends
10.20 G||more G|r|s 11.15
Desperate Housew|ves
12.10pm veron|oa Mars
1.05 Sorubs 2.05 Fr|ends
2.35 Ho||yoaks 3.05 G||more
G|r|s 4.0 Samantha Who?
4.30 Fr|ends 6.0 Sorubs
7.0 Ho||yoaks 7.30 Fr|ends
9.0 Sma||v|||e 10.0 The
O|eve|and Show 10.30 The
R|oky Gerva|s Show 11.0
K|ng Of The H||| 12.0m't
Sorubs 1.0am The O|eve|and
Show 1.25 The R|oky Gerva|s
Show 1.50 K|ng Of The H|||
2.30 What About Br|an 3.50
Samantha Who? 4.15 The
H|||s 4.35 Sw|tohed
M More4
9.0am Dea| Or No Dea| 9.45
Room For lmprovement 10.45
How O|ean ls Your House?
11.20 FlLM: Party GirI
(1958} Or|me drama, starr|ng
Robert Tay|or. 1.15pm 3
M|nute Wonder: vo|oes 1.20
3 M|nute Wonder: My Home
ls My Shoes 1.30 Dea| Or No
Dea| 2.20 Oe|ebr|ty Oome
D|ne W|th Me 2.50 Ooaoh
Tr|p 3.20 |ooat|on, |ooat|on,
|ooat|on 4.25 A P|aoe ln The
Sun: Home Or Away 5.30
Re|ooat|on, Re|ooat|on 6.35
Dea| Or No Dea| 7.25 Grand
Des|gns S.30 The Da||y Show
W|th Jon Stewart 9.0 Oountry
House Resoue 10.0 True
Stor|es: The Dano|ng Boys Of
Afghan|stan 11.10 Afghan
Star 1.05am Oountry House
Resoue 2.10 True Stor|es: The
Dano|ng Boys Of Afghan|stan
3.15 A P|aoe ln The Sun:
Home Or Away 4.20 O|ose
M Fiver
6.0am Te|eshopp|ng 9.0 W||d
An|ma| ER 10.0 Ne|ghbours
10.30 Home And Away 11.0
The Wr|ght Stuff 12.30pm
Tr|sha Goddard 1.30 Two
Guys And A G|r| 2.0 Mea|s
ln Moments 2.10 W||d
An|ma| ER 3.10 Two Guys
And A G|r| 4.05 8 S|mp|e
Ru|es 5.0 Po||oe lnteroeptors
6.0 Everybody Hates Ohr|s
6.20 Push 6.30 Home
And Away 7.0 Ne|ghbours
7.35 Everybody Hates Ohr|s
S.0 The Gadget Show 9.0
Oowboy Bu||ders 10.0 OOTv
O|t|es 11.0 Sex |essons
11.30 Seoret G|r|fr|end
12.0m't Te|eshopp|ng
Sky1
6.0am Fat Fam|||es 7.0
Bra|n|ao: So|enoe Abuse
S.0 Oops Tv 9.0 ||on Man
10.0 Bones 11.0 Wedd|ng
SOS 11.30 Bra|n Dootors
12.0noon Fat Fam|||es
1.0pm Projeot Runway 2.0
Bones 3.0 Stargate SG-1 5.0
Ma|oo|m ln The M|dd|e 5.30
Futurama 6.0 Oops Tv 6.30
The S|mpsons S.0 The ||tt|e
Ooup|e S.30 Super Nurses
9.0 FlLM: Batman And
Robin (1997} 11.20 FlLM:
Kung Fu KiIIer ll (2007}
Mart|a| arts adventure seque|,
starr|ng Dav|d Oarrad|ne.
1.05am N|ght Oops 2.0 K
Border Foroe 2.50 B|te S|ze
Bra|n|ao 3.05 Oops Tv 3.30
The 4400 4.20 vroom vroom
5.10 Se|| Me The Answer
M Sky3
6.0am Gu||ty! 7.0 Ne||
Morr|ssey's Exoe||ent
Adventure S.0 Se|| Me The
Answer 9.0 |orra|ne Ke||y's
DNA Stor|es 9.30 |ondon
Ambu|anoe 10.0 Med|oa|
Emergenoy 11.0 Shear
Gen|us 12.0noon Med|oa|
Emergenoy 1.0pm K|m's
Rude Awaken|ng 2.0 Zoo vet
At |arge 3.0 M|ss|ng 4.0 Are
You Smarter Than A 10 Year
O|d? 6.0 Shear Gen|us 7.0
Ho||day A|r||ne S.0 The F||th
F||es 9.0 Obese At 16 10.0
Road Wars 11.0 N|ght Oops
12.0m't A|r||ne 1.0am M|nn|e
Dr|ver's Exoe||ent Adventure
1.55 Fam||y Oourt: Judge
Penny 2.45 Se|| Me The
Answer 3.40 Road Wars 4.10
Gu||ty! 5.05 M|ss|ng
M Dave
7.0am A|rport S.0 Dragons'
Den 9.0 Top Gear 10.0 F|fth
Gear 10.30 The Gadget
Show 11.0 Dragons' Den
12.0noon Top Gear 2.0pm
Speeders 2.30 F|fth Gear
3.30 The Gadget Show
4.0 Top Gear 6.0 F|fth Gear
6.30 The Gadget Show 7.0
Dragons' Den S.0 Top Gear
9.0 Ol | 10.0 Argumenta|
10.40 Mook The Week
11.20 Have l Got News For
You 12.0m't Ol | 1.0am
Argumenta| 1.40 Mook The
Week 2.15 And Then You D|e
3.0 O|ose
G.O.L.D
6.0am Bread 6.30 Seven Of
One 7.0 |ast Of The Summer
W|ne 7.30 Bread S.0 Seven
Of One S.40 |ast Of The
Summer W|ne 9.20 Sykes
10.0 As T|me Goes By
10.40 Keep|ng p
Appearanoes 11.20 One Foot
ln The Grave 12.0noon |ast
Of The Summer W|ne 1.20pm
Steptoe And Son 2.0 On|y
Foo|s And Horses 2.40 The
Green Green Grass 4.0 As
T|me Goes By 4.40 Keep|ng
p Appearanoes 5.20 One
Foot ln The Grave 6.0 |ast
Of The Summer W|ne 7.20
Steptoe And Son S.0 On|y
Foo|s And Horses 10.0 Faw|ty
Towers 10.40 Abso|ute|y
Fabu|ous 12.0m't Ear|y Doors
12.40am Abso|ute|y Fabu|ous
2.0 Ear|y Doors 3.0 O|ose
Living
6.0am Home Shopp|ng 7.0
The Jerry Spr|nger Show 7.50
Oe|ebs 24/7 S.0 Maury S.55
Oe|ebs 24/7 9.0 Amer|oa's
Next Top Mode| 10.0 Maury
10.55 Oe|ebs 24/7 11.0
Four Wedd|ngs 12.0noon
Short|and Street 1.0pm OSl:
Or|me Soene lnvest|gat|on 3.0
Or|m|na| M|nds 4.0 Oharmed
6.0 Amer|oa's Next Top Mode|
7.0 Four Wedd|ngs S.0
Br|ta|n's Next Top Mode| 9.0
Drop Dead D|va 10.0 Teen
Mom 11.0 Or|m|na| M|nds
12.0m't OSl: Or|me Soene
lnvest|gat|on 2.0am Oharmed
3.50 G|r|s Of The P|ayboy
Mans|on 4.40 The Jerry
Spr|nger Show 5.30 Home
Shopp|ng
Bravo
S.0am Star Trek: voyager 9.0
Operat|on Repo 10.0 H|ghway
Patro| 11.0 Dog The Bounty
Hunter 12.0noon Dead|y
North Sea 1.0pm Operat|on
Repo 2.0 H|ghway Patro|
3.0 Dead|y North Sea 4.0
Dog The Bounty Hunter 5.0
H|ghway Patro| 6.0 Operat|on
Repo 7.0 Dead|y North
Sea S.0 |everage 9.0 Br|t
Oops: |aw & D|sorder 10.0
Spartaous: B|ood And Sand
11.10 Manswers 12.10am
Star Trek: voyager 1.10 Dog
The Bounty Hunter 2.10
Mart|a| |aw 3.05 Star Trek:
voyager 4.0 O|ose 5.0 Home
Shopp|ng
Syfy
6.0am Ouantum |eap
7.0 Myster|ous Ways S.0
Te|eshopp|ng 11.0 Ouantum
|eap 12.0noon Sma||v|||e
1.0pm Ange| 2.0 Buffy The
vamp|re S|ayer 3.0 FlLM:
Meteor Storm (2010} 5.0
Ange| 6.0 Sma||v|||e 7.0
Buffy The vamp|re S|ayer S.0
A Town Oa||ed Eureka 9.0
FlLM: Dragonheart (1996}
Fantasy adventure, starr|ng
Denn|s Oua|d. 11.0 FlLM:
Fire Serpent (2007} Horror,
starr|ng N|oho|as Brendon.
12.40am FlLM: Storm
Seekers (2008} Aot|on
adventure, starr|ng Dary|
Hannah. 2.30 3rd Rook From
The Sun 3.0 Myster|ous Ways
4.0 Sma||v|||e 5.0 Ange|
MTV One
6.0am My Super Sweet 16
S.0 Made 9.0 Daddy's G|r|s
10.0 Hogan Knows Best
11.0 Run's House 12.0noon
Tak|ng The Stage 1.0pm
Hogan Knows Best 2.0 Run's
House 3.0 Tak|ng The Stage
4.0 My Super Sweet 16 5.0
Made 6.0 Daddy's G|r|s 7.0
Jess|oa S|mpson: Pr|oe Of
Beauty S.0 Top 20 9.0 Jersey
Shore 10.0 The Hard T|mes
Of RJ Berger 11.0 D|saster
Date 12.0m't South Park
1.0am The Dudesons ln
Amer|oa 2.0 Pranked 3.0 A||
The H|ts
fiIm
Sky Movies Premiere
10.0am The Hangover
(2009} 11.45 9 (2009}
1.10pm Weather G|r| (2009}
2.50 O|rque Du Freak: The
vamp|re's Ass|stant (2009}
4.40 Bands|am (2009}
6.35 9 (2009} S.0 (500}
Days Of Summer (2009}
Romant|o oomedy, starr|ng
Joseph Gordon-|ev|tt and
Zooey Desohane|. 9.45 The
Hangover (2009} Oomedy,
starr|ng Brad|ey Oooper.
11.40 Suk|yak| Western
Django (2007} 1.40am Fam||y
Show 2.10 The Top 10 Show
2.30 O|ose
Sky Movies Action &
Adventure
6.25am Ange| F||ght Down
(1996} S.0 The |ost Batta||on
(2001} 9.40 Never Baok Down
(2008} 11.40 The 6th Day
(2000} 1.50pm Body Of ||es
(2008} 4.0 Trop|o Thunder
(2008} 5.50 Body Of ||es
(2008} S.0 Trop|o Thunder
(2008} W|th Ben St|||er. 10.0
The 6th Day (2000} W|th
Arno|d Sohwarzenegger.
12.05am P|neapp|e Express
(2008} 2.05 Ex|t Wounds
(2001} 3.55 The |ost Batta||on
(2001} 5.30 Ange| F||ght Down
(1996}
Sky Movies Comedy
7.15am Beethoven's 2nd
(1993} S.50 Kung Fu Panda
(2008} 10.25 Hanoook (2008}
12.0noon Ro|e Mode|s (2008}
1.45pm The |ove Guru
(2008} 3.15 Prob|em Oh||d
(1990} 4.40 The Aoo|denta|
Husband (2008} 6.20 Kung
Fu Panda (2008} S.0 Hanoook
(2008} W|th W||| Sm|th. 9.45
Ro|e Mode|s (2008} W|th Pau|
Rudd. 11.30 The |ove Guru
(2008} 1.0am The Aoo|denta|
Husband (2008} 2.35 Prob|em
Oh||d (1990} 4.0 35MM 4.30
Beethoven's 2nd (1993}
Sky Movies Sci-hI
Horror
S.0am T|tan AE (2000} 9.40
lnfestat|on (2009} 11.20
Out|ander (2008} 1.20pm The
Mummy: Tomb Of The Dragon
Emperor (2008} 3.15 Sphere
(1998} 5.30 lnfestat|on (2009}
7.05 The Mummy: Tomb Of
The Dragon Emperor (2008}
9.0 Sphere (1998} W|th Dust|n
Hoffman. 11.15 The |ast
House On The |eft (2009}
W|th Tony Go|dwyn. 1.05am
Out|ander (2008} 3.05
Hann|ba| (2001} 5.30 Prev|ew
M FiIm4
11.0am The Dark Oorner
(1946, b/w} 12.55pm Sa||or
Of The K|ng (1953, b/w} 2.40
Oarouse| (1956} 5.10 A Matter
Of ||fe And Death (1946} 7.15
ln & Out (1997} 9.0 Keep|ng
Mum (2005} Br|t|sh oomedy,
starr|ng Rowan Atk|nson. 11.0
Oontro| (2007, b/w} 1.20am
D|soo P|gs (2001} 3.20 O|ose
Sert
Sky Sports 1
6.0am Good Morn|ng Sports
Fans 9.0 How The 1995
Ryder Oup Was Won 11.0
How The 1997 Ryder Oup
Was Won 2.0pm lr|sh Footba||
3.30 Netbusters 4.0 Soooer
AM: The Best B|ts 5.0 Prem|er
|eague Rev|ew 6.0 Rev|sta De
|a ||ga 7.0 Sky Sports News
At Seven 7.30 Soooer Speo|a|
10.30 Footba|| As|a Soooer
news. 11.0 Rev|sta De |a ||ga
12.0m't A-|eague 12.30am
EFA Ohamp|ons |eague
Goa|s 1.30 Rev|sta De
|a ||ga 2.30 Footba|| As|a
3.0 EFA Ohamp|ons |eague
Goa|s 4.0 Rev|sta De |a
||ga 5.0 A-|eague 5.30 As|an
Tour Go|f Show
Sky Sports 2
6.0am Aerob|os Oz Sty|e
6.30 rban R|de 7.0 WWE:
Afterburn S.0 Prem|er |eague
Rev|ew 9.0 Netbusters 9.30
lr|sh Footba|| 11.0 SP|
Round-p 11.30 Netbusters
12.0noon Soooer AM: The
Best B|ts 1.0pm Prem|er
|eague Rev|ew 2.0 Tr||by
Tour Go|f 2.30 Ang||ng 3.0
Br|t|sh Ra||y Ohamp|onsh|p 4.0
WWE: Smaokdown 6.0 Great
Run Ser|es 6.30 Mounta|n
B|ke Wor|d 7.0 ||ve EFA
Ohamp|ons |eague. 10.0
EFA Ohamp|ons |eague
Goa|s 11.0 Poker M||||on
1.0am Sports n||m|ted 2.0
Wor|d Poo| Masters 3.0 O|ose
M ESPN
6.0am ESPN K|oks Extra
6.15 Russ|an Prem|er |eague
Footba|| S.0 Pardon The
lnterrupt|on S.30 Press Pass
2010 9.0 Ta|k Of The Terraoe
10.30 Between The ||nes
11.0 Prem|ersh|p Rugby
n|on 12.30pm ESPN
Prem|er |eague K|oks 12.45
ESPN Soott|sh Prem|er |eague
K|oks 1.0 Press Pass 2010
1.30 Pardon The lnterrupt|on
2.0 Bundes||ga Rev|ew Show
3.15 Ta|k Of The Terraoe
4.45 Between The ||nes 5.15
ESPN Soott|sh Prem|er |eague
K|oks 5.30 ESPN Ser|e A
K|oks 5.45 ESPN Prem|er
|eague K|oks 6.0 ESPN
Game Of The Week 6.30
Ered|v|s|e Rev|ew Show 7.30
NF|: Monday N|ght Footba||.
Oh|oago Bears v Green Bay
Paokers. 10.0 Pardon The
lnterrupt|on 10.30 NBA
Basketba|| 11.30 Prem|er
|eague Rev|ew 12.30am
Russ|an Prem|er |eague
Rev|ew 1.0 AF| Rev|ew Show
2.0 Press Pass 2010 2.30
ESPN Prem|er |eague K|oks
2.45 Bundes||ga Rev|ew Show
4.0 Ered|v|s|e Rev|ew Show
5.0 ESPN Game of the Week
5.30 ESPN Soott|sh Prem|er
|eague K|oks
celebrate The city
with Metro
900N09 0F THE 0LENN MILLER ERA
Her Majesty's Theatre, Haymarket,
London, WC2H 7BX
Sunday October 3rd at 5.30pm
0844 412 4657
Exclusive Metro Reader Offer Quote
"Ce|ebrate the C|ty" for best available
seats 15 (usually 27j and a free
Concert Programme (usually 3j
booking fee applies.
T
he Nick Ross Orchestra is to
bring the big band sound of
the 1940's to the West End
once again with a spectacular concert
marking the 70th anniversary of the
Battle of Britain, at Her Majesty's
Theatre on Sunday October 3rd.
With a great line up of saxophones,
trumpets, trombones, a rhythm section
and top vocalists, The Nick Ross
Orchestra will recreate the wonderful
sound of artists like Glenn Miller, Count
Basie, Woody Herman and Tommy
Dorsey. The concert celebrating the
inimitable Glenn Miller promises to be
an "unmissable" evening of music and
song.
For further information go to
www.n|ckrossorchestra.com
HOW TO BOOK
T
FOR ANOTHER GREAT CELEBRATE THE ClTY OFFER SEE TOMORROW'S METRO
Family are on your mind more than usual and you may
find yourself thinking of someone who is no longer
around but was important to you. Just remember to
celebrate themand remember themwith joy.
A sense of humour is your key tool to have at your
side in today`s dramas and confrontations. Taking
time out for a personal matter puts a large smile on
your face, so don`t deny yourself.
You no longer seem to be too sure if you are
coming or going as far as a certain relationship in
your life is concerned. What you do know is you
need to talk.
l wonder why it is that you have started to let
people manipulate you Cancer? ls it because you
feel you need to bow down to make them feel
worthy of you? lt better not be!
Yours is the sign that`s going to be walking around
with a secret smile. You really will look like the cat
that has got the cream and much pleasure can be
found both emotionally and financially.
Even if there is any truth in rumours it cannot do
you any good to bring attention to yourself. Make
a game plan. This can be done by showing a
loved one you have faith in them.
Look around you then you should see that you are
finally starting to mix with some new and very
varied groups of friends. This is just what you
wanted last month in fact, but were unable to get.
Scorpio`s hold the key to what could become one
of the most important relationships of your life.
Your day-to-day living is changing; ensure you
shape it, while you have the power to do so.
Don`t abuse the power the stars are handing you. lf
you don`t get on with someone, leave them to their
own devices but don`t cause an unnecessary
situation, or you`ll cast yourself in a jealous role.
New friends can be found under the sign of
Capricorn throughout the coming seven days.
What you thought to be a promise in business may
only have been an idea, unless you get it in writing.
There is much work that needs to be done, and it`s
important that you don`t allow a wayward friend to
talk you into taking any short cuts. You could
damage the spotless reputation that you have.
What you think to be fact, may turn out to be only
fiction. Slow your pace Pisces and try to look at the
bigger picture. Certain close ones have been
trying to cover their backs.
620(21( 5(3257(' $ &5$&.
,1 7+( &(,/,1* -867 $%29(
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5tart The 0ay
For the Metro crossword, see www.metro.co.ukJcrossword
For puzzIe answers, go to www.metro.co.ukJanswers
For your chance to win
100 today, comp|ete this
Metroku grid to revea| the
digits that shou|d go in the
shaded squares.
A winner wi|| be se|ected
at random from the correct
entries received.
To enter text METROK
fo||owed by a spaoe, then
your answers (read|ng |eft to
r|ght}, frst name and postoode
to 65400, |e METROK 458
DAvlD W8 5TT. Texts oost 1
(standard network oharges
app|y}. Metro Promot|ona| Ru|es
app|y. For more deta||s v|s|t
www.metro.oo.uk
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THI5 LIFE by Rick Brookes
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2. Sore
3. Fasten
4. Lower
5. Dairy product
6. Wild ass
7. Reply
8. Scoundrel
9. Hesitate
10. Parent
11. Deer's horn
12. Digit
The so|ut|ons from 1 to 12 are a|| s|x-|etter words end|ng w|th
the |etter R |n the oentre. Mov|ng o|ookw|se from 1, the |etters
|n the outer o|ro|e w||| spe|| out the name of a Br|t|sh oomed|an.
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Yesterday's so|ut|on:
Gregory H|nes.
A N S W E R S : E N l G M A : P e | t . W H O A M l ? G | n g e r M o O a | n . W H O , W H A T ,
W H E R E A N D W H E N ? J o h n N a s h , P a t h o | o g y , T | b e t , 1 9 5 8 - 1 9 6 0 .
ENIGMA
Type of sk|n a beast w||| wear,
Whether |ong or short of ha|r.
Ra|n does th|s out of the sky.
You do too to keep you dry!
WHO AM I?
A raoehorse tra|ner, l was born |n
1930 and ohr|stened Dona|d.
l started tra|n|ng horses beh|nd a
used-oar showroom |n Southport
|n 1952. l tra|ned the Grand
Nat|ona| w|nners Red Rum and
Amber|e|gh House.
WHO, WHAT, WHERE
AND WHEN?
WHO. rebu||t Buok|ngham
Pa|aoe between 1821-36?
WHAT. |s the med|oa| speo|a||ty
oonoerned w|th the study of
d|sease prooesses oa||ed?
WHERE. |s |hasa the oap|ta| of
that oountry?
WHEN. was the Great |eap
Forward |nst|gated by Mao
Zedong?
Provisional 0hristmas Market dates may be subject to change that is outside our control; contact the relevant tourist board or ull details. /ll prices are pounds per
person based on two adults sharing a room. /ll prices are based on the lowest available Lurostar are, we recommend you book early or travel at o peak times.
Discount is less than three nights or one on Monday departures or where supplements apply. 3upplements apply or other
arrival days and times and during peak periods. Discount is based on the 0reat 0etaways 2010 price guide edition 2.
No amendments or cancellations permitted. 0redit card ee 2%. 0alls to 0871 numbers cost 10 per minute rom a BJ landline,
other networks may vary. 3ee the website or details o our data protection policy. 0er subject to availability. Full terms and
conditions apply. 0reat 0etaways is a trading name o /cromas Holidays Ltd (/BJ/ 1720), company registration no. 217405
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Prces are s per person, from Arrival
day
Se-0ct
1 night
frcm
PARIS
2Scvereign crd de Seine (outskirts) Any day 139 139 30/FPEE
3rittany Fr 195 189 24/FPEE
3+Amarante Arc de 1ricmhe Fr-Sat 229 199 90/60
BR0SSELS
3Ibis Care du Midi Fr 159 155 10/FPEE
4Mercure Centre Lcuise Fr 189 179 10/FPEE
LILLE
2& Euralille Crand Palais (room only) Sat 119 99 10/FPEE#
3Hctel des 1curs Fr-Sun 179 169 FPEE/FPEE*
BR00ES
3Hans Memling Sun-1ue 189 169 30/16
0HEN1
2Ibis 0era Fr 169 165 16/FPEE
AN1WERP
3Century Any day 159 149 40/FPEE
/ll prices are based on o-peak departures. 3eptember arrivals: or Paris add rom 34 per person or 3at arrivals or 76 or Fri arrivals; Brussels, Bruges, 0hent and /ntwerp
add rom 10 per person. #B&B Luralille 0rand Palais add 10 3at arrivals in Dec. Hotel des Jours add 60 Fri arrivals 3ep-0ct and 50 Fri-3at arrivals 22 Nov-12 Dec.
Ncv-20 Dec
1 night
frcm
Se-0ct/Ncv-Dec
2nd & 3rd night
frcm
From |ate November these ctes come a|ve wth festve markets, fantastc
for soakng up the atmosphere or fndng unque gfts.
Here are the provisional dates or this year's events:
Paris: various dates Dec Lille: Nov 24-Dec 30
russels: Nov 26-1an 2 ruges: Nov 24-Dec 31
Chent: Dec 11-30 Antwer: Dec 8-26
0on't mlss the 0hrlstmas MarketsI
cck a cne night Eurcstar break and get
twc extra nights free with this fantastic
deal cr makegreat savings cncther breaks.
/ll breaks include 3 nights' accommodation,
breakast (unless otherwise stated) and return
travel on Lurostar (plus local rail rom Brussels
to Bruges, 0hent or /ntwerp). we can also
book your UK rail to London rom over 130
stations, please call or a quote.
vst www.metro.co.uklgreatgetaways or ca|| 08?1 222 1002
(quote M1P132)
Editedby 1ayne Athertonjayne.athertonQukmetro.co.uk
Business &Finance
O LOW earners are fac|ng
mass|ve pens|on gaps,
new research |nd|cates.
Those who hope to ret|re
on a pens|on of 16,166 a
year are on track to rece|ve
just 8,608 - a gap of
more than 7,500,
accord|ng to consu|tancy
group Hymans Robertson.
'Un|ess there |s a dec|s|ve
change |n pens|ons po||cy
and |n att|tudes to sav|ng,
many w||| not have an
adequate |ncome to
ensure the|r d|gn|ty and
|ndependence |n
ret|rement,' sa|d
spokesman John Wr|ght.
O NESTL says |t p|ans to pump hundreds of
m||||ons of pounds |nto a new med|ca| nutr|t|on
bus|ness, deve|op|ng foods to prevent and treat
cond|t|ons such as d|abetes, obes|ty and even
A|zhe|mer's d|sease. The food g|ant beh|nd K|t
Kat and Nescaf sa|d |t wou|d 'p|oneer a new
|ndustry between food and pharma' v|a
subs|d|ary Nest| Hea|th Sc|ence and a research
and deve|opment centre |n Sw|tzer|and wh|ch
w||| become operat|ona| |n January.
hold. The increase was partly fuelled by
the popularity of tax-free ISAs, which
were launched in 1999.
People collectively put away 558bil-
lion into savings accounts between
2000 and the end of 2009, with deposits
accounting for 70 per cent of total new
savings made during the decade.
But individuals sold more shares than
they bought during the ten years, with
the amount of money invested in equi-
ties falling by 190billion, according to
the Lloyds study.
'This has been a signifcant decade for
savers in the UK,` said Suren Thiru,
economist at Lloyds TSB. 'The sub-
stantial rise of new household savings
over the past ten years refects the
extent to which savers have worked
hard to build their nest egg.`
However, the average person`s sav-
ings have dived by more than a ffth
since earlier this year, separate research
shows. We put away 102 a month on
average - down from 130 in February,
according to Spanish bank Santander.
And while 25 per cent of us plan to in-
crease the amount we save each month,
42 per cent are not saving at all, the fg-
ures show. Seventy per cent of people
have money set aside for a rainy day.
However, 30 per cent of the 2,000
people questioned in the study admit
they do not have any savings and 12 per
cent have savings but are not adding to
them at the moment.
1Bo Rf tR
o o B o oB
cheryl Latham
high street bank Lloyds TSB. That is 46
per cent more than the total we saved
during the 1990s, or an increase of 14
per cent once infation is stripped out. It
works out to about 30,105 per house-
SAVERS have squirrelled away more
than 800billion over the last decade
but the downturn has slowed that fgure,
new studies show.
We put 802billion into deposit ac-
counts, pensions and shares between
2000 and the end of 2009, according to
Yesterday's ups and downs.
World 5tock Markets
252 180 1uplter Fund Mngt 252 +5.40
546 276 Mlorc Fcous lntl 385 +5.25
280 162 lntl lerscnal Flnanoe 278 +4.75
368 233 Melrcse Rescuroes 311 +4.18
223 110 Xohanglng 152 +3.83
Big winners
Hlgh Lcw Ccmpany lrloe var
87 61 Mcneysupermkt.ocm 82 3.45
307 205 Salamander Lnergy 250 3.09
670 528 ^frloan Barrlok Ccld 578 3.02
283 219 C4S 253 2.81
148 55 Cable & w Ccmm 59 2.63
Big losers
Hlgh Lcw Ccmpany lrloe var
Dcw 1cnes (3pm) Unlted States 10828.58 31.68 11205.03 9487.67
N^SD^ (3pm) Unlted States 2370.57 10.65 2530.15 2045.11
Nlkkel 1apan 9603.14 +131.47 11339.30 8824.06
Hang Seng Hcng Kcng 22340.84 +221.41 22943.98 18985.50
D^X Cermany 6278.89 19.41 6351.60 5353.35
C^C40 Franoe 3766.16 16.32 4065.65 3331.29
lndex Ccuntry Clcse Change Hlgh Lcw
currencies
lcund 0.6304 0.0137 0.6442
Lurc 0.7419 0.0416 0.7834
Yen 84.1850 0.9300 85.1150
ound
at Clcse Change 1Mth agc
commodities
at Clcse Change
Ccld (5/cz) 1297.00 unohanged
Sllver (p/cz) 1358.99 up 0.42
Brent Crude (5/brl) 78.73 up 1.04
Dcllar 1.5861 +0.0338 1.5524
Lurc 1.1766 0.0397 1.2163
Yen 133.5100 +1.3900 132.1200
0ollar
at Clcse Change 1Mth agc
ûstralla (^5) 1.56
Canada (C5) 1.54
Lurc (L) 1.12
lsrael (shekel) 5.23
New Zealand (NZ5) 2.00
lcland (zlcty) 4.07
Slngapcre (5) 1.95
Scuth ^frloa (rand) 10.32
Swltzerland (fr) 1.48
US (5) 1.51
Tourist Rates
Interest Rates
Retall lrloe lndex (ûg) 4.70
Base Rate at 09/09/2010 0.50
Fln Hcuse Rate (Sep) 1.00
Scuroe: The lress ^sscolatlcn
The FT5E-100 cIosed at 5573.42 - down 25.0.
The FT5E-250 cIosed at 1052.5 - up 23.5.
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Editedby 1ayne Athertonjayne.athertonQukmetro.co.uk
Business &Finance
O THE owner of Imper|a| Leather and Carex
bought tann|ng |ot|on company St Tropez
yesterday for 62.5m||||on. Manchester-based
PZ Cussons hopes to use St Tropez's
d|str|but|on network to grow |ts spa brand, The
Sanctuary, before mak|ng a push overseas.
St Tropez posted pre-tax prots of 7.4m||||on
|n the year end|ng Ju|y. It was an 'exce||ent
acqu|s|t|on done at an attract|ve pr|ce', sa|d
Panmure Gordon ana|yst Graham Jones.
Lucky: Th|s pure go|d rabb|t statue |s worth a good b|t more than a
coup|e of days ago after go|d reached a new h|gh of $1,300 (820|
an ounce. The statue, on d|sp|ay at Tanaka K|k|nzoku Jewe||ery |n
Tokyo, we|ghs 200g and wou|d set you back 12,000 P|oture: AFP/Getty
wary bosses 'too
scared' to borrow
NEARLY two-thirds of companies
are so uneasy about the economic
climate that they have put off all bor-
rowing, new fgures show.
And one in ten companies has
postponed or cancelled development
plans - such as buying out other com-
panies, expanding ranges or opening
new shops - collectively saving
600million.
Amid widespread fears banks are
reluctant to lend, the new research
suggests the opposite could be true.
Just ten per cent of businesses with
an annual turnover of 1million or
more said they planned to borrow
from banks, asking for an average
of 98,560, while 63 per cent do not
want to borrow at all.
The fndings, published by banking
group Investec, also show no increase
in borrowing demand on the previous
three months.
However, with low savings rates
and high infation, businesses which
keep their cash in the bank could be
making signifcant losses.
'People seem terrifed to spend at the
moment but if almost ten per cent of
businesses are postponing investment,
that`s just cash sat in the bank making
derisory returns,` said Jack Jones of
Investec. 'Some of these business ac-
counts only pay out 0.1 per cent inter-
est, so in real terms after infation that
is a loss of around three per cent.
'People shop around for raw materi-
als to try and get the best price but
often the money that`s sat in the bank
gets forgotten about,` he said.
About 13 per cent of business
savings accounts are paying out less
than 0.1 per cent on balances of
50,000, while 32 per cent are paying
0.1 per cent or less.
'People have got to start shopping
around with their accounts to get the
best possible return on their money,`
added Mr Jones.
Exclusive R cheryl Latham
lumb
giant
quits
0Ktax
base
BUILDING and heating
supplies frm Wolseley
said yesterday it planned to
move its tax base from
Britain to Switzerland in a
bid to avoid taxes. The
FTSE 100 Index-listed
company, which trades as
Build Center and Plumb
Center, will make the
move due to 'unhelpful`
legislation which forces
the company to pay tax on
its overseas earnings.
Wolseley, which generates
81 per cent of its business
abroad, said it will open a
separate holding company
called NewWolseley by
late November, to avoid
paying 'tax twice` under
Controlled Foreign
Companies rules. The
announcement came as
Wolseley reported a nine
per cent rise in revenues to
13.2billion and trading
profts of 450million in
the year to July 31, up one
per cent on a year earlier.
Wolseley chief fnancial
offcer John Martin said the
change would save about
23million a year. He
added the move would not
affect tax paid on the British
business, which employs
nearly 10,000 people.
O I was sorry to read Chris Moyles
hasn`t been paid for two months
(Metro, Thu). I do sympathise with
public sector workers in this
predicament. I`m a GP and I`d
venture to suggest we docs are very
nearly as valuable to society as
Radio 1 DJs. Due to the quirkiness
of the NHS, I haven`t been paid for
far longer than this - indeed last
month I had to pay 2,500 into my
practice`s bank account from my
own pocket so the staff would be
paid and the patients treated. It`s
a massive balls-up - if the same
thing happened to DJs, we`d never
hear the end of it.
Dr John Cormack, Essex
O T Turbutt, to say your son '
to pay 12 a month` from his
unemployment beneht for a TV
licence is ridiculous (Metro, Thu).
As he doesn`t have a job he should
save those 12 for essentials, such
as food. TV and radio are a luxury,
not a necessity. Also, calling free
money a 'pittance` is ungrateful;
as a higher-rate tax payer, Mr
Moyles will have given far more
than 12 a month to the over-
inated welfare system of which
your son is a benehciary. If your
son doesn`t think it is enough, he
should get a job and pay some tax
himself, thereby making more
money available for a potential
increase in unemployment beneht.
T Rossiter, London SW1
O Just because Chris Moyles is an
oaf does not justify attacks on the
BBC in general. It provides a great
public service for less than 3 a
week. I`m not a Radio 1 fan but if
we lost the Beeb, with its wide
variety of programmes, we would
soon realise what we were missing.
Steve Lustig, London NW2
Leave it to us, omcer
On patro|: Po||ce have adm|tted yobs are tak|ng over the streets
O So the police have had to admit
they`ve left our streets free for yobs to
roam (Metro, Thu)? If they don`t have
the resources to tackle this vastly
increasing problem, I would like
to suggest we, the public, be allowed a
somewhat freer hand to tackle yobbish,
loutish and antisocial behaviour
ourselves, within reason, without the
fear of being prosecuted, as has often
been the case.
I`m not advocating vigilante law,
merely suggesting we are permitted to
take reasonable measures to protect
ourselves, our families, our property
and our neighbourhoods. Even if we
are fortunate enough to have police
attending an incident within a
reasonable time and the offenders are
apprehended, it is so often the case
they are too young to be dealt with as
criminals. Even when they are older
they are given derisory sentences.
In view of the police being unable
to get to grips with this problem,
what is the alternative? To surrender
our streets and neighbourhoods
to anarchy?
Jan Bednarczyk, London NW9
O Thousands of people in Britain
have been driven to near desperation
by antisocial behaviour, so to read
the police admit they have lost the
streets does little to console them or
compensate for the misery these
people have had to endure.
Of course it hasn`t been helped by
council jobsworths failing to deal
effectively with complaints. So, now
the police have admitted they`ve let
us down, are they going to put it
right? What do you think?
ST Vaughan, Birmingham
O On the front page (Metro, Fri) we
read about an honoured soldier who
had to dodge bullets while defusing
139 improvised explosive devices
(IEDs) in Afghanistan, no doubt
saving countless lives, but refuses to
be labelled 'brave`.
Then further on we have a story about
nine police offcers pouncing on parents
for parking illegally while picking up
their disabled children from school.
Kind of puts into perspective who the
real heroes are, doesn`t it?
James, London SW15
M
M
M
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CPS rule ih the

right directioh
Nothing to do with race
Forget 03s,
what about
unpaid us7
O In response to schools using
GPS for admissions being labelled
'crazy` (Metro, Mon) ~ what
would campaigner Nick Seaton
have committees do when there is
one place left and two applicants
in the same tower block? Why is
it 'crazy` to have a clear rule in
place? Rather than whingeing
about GPS, Mr Seaton would do
better to explain what he would do
if he was on the admissions panel
at an oversubscribed school.
Andy Dawson, school governor
O Regarding the six Gateshead
men held for setting hre to the
Koran (Metro, Fri) ~ I do not
agree with what they have
allegedly done but I also don`t
agree with the reason for their
arrest. I don`t see how an attack
on a religion can be considered as
stirring racial hatred. If it was a
Bible being burnt, would that also
be seen as stirring racial hatred?
Yet again our justice system
seems incapable of properly
distinguishing between what
dehnes race and simply
exchanges these terms without
giving any thought to what they
actually mean.
Liam Whales, Sheffeld
O The police seem to be rather
confused about what a race-hate
crime consists of. While Abu Hamza
was suggesting killing white people,
the six men were allegedly burning a
book which represented a faith.
While many of the Islam faith may
not be white, some of them are, so
burning the Koran cannot be a race-
hate crime, although I do agree it
could stir up hatred.
DL Borrel, Lancashire
Thank you, Metro, for
keeping me sane on the
train to Manchester after
I forgot to bring a book.
Charlotte, West Midlands
A big thanks to the
ticket lady on the 7pm
train to Ayr on Sep 11 for
posting my son`s phone to
Ireland. She wouldn`t
accept any money and took
the time to post it.
Mrs Hasson, Co Antrim
Thank you to my lovely
ear, nose and throat
surgeon, Alexandros, for
the nice smells I`m having.
I`d bake you a pie any day.
Deborah, Newcastle
X
X
X
Thanks to the man who
ran in the rain to return
my boyfriend`s parcel shelf
in the Ikea car park. Knew
we`d forgotten something!
Katie, Liverpool
Thanks to the little girl
who made me chuckle
today on the 120 bus when
she said she could take her
guinea pig to the cemetery
on her scooter.
Lynn, Sheffeld
Thank you to those who
helped me when I fainted
at the station. Especially
the lady who gave me her
water ~ I`d just landed
on her. Gill, Newcastle
X
X
X
uood 0eed Feed
1ext beed followed by your comment,
name and where you live to S4uu
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norma| network rate. Fu||
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Scnd u ,our
1ext Views followed by your comment,

name and where you live to S4uu
Who is Chris Moyles?
No, really, who is he?
Dee, Nottingham
I think the text views
are really funny. Why not
make a book of some of
them and publish it?
John, Shropshire
If I want to travel around
the world, do I ask for a
single from Edinburgh to
Edinburgh?
Wanderer, Edinburgh
I`m just back after a
week in Spain to a cold
and damp Monday. Gosh
I feel miserable. I really
need cheering up.
Ben, Surrey
X
X
X
X
Janet in Epping Tube
car park ~ Reading is 19
a day, lucky you!
Anon, via text
Six hllings, a couple of
crowns and what looked
like toast ~ the delightful
sight I was met with this
morning because someone
didn`t cover their mouth
when yawning.
Mimi, London
Does my iPod weigh
more as I add tunes? Or
does it only get heavier
when I download Black
Sabbath? Phil, Essex
I, too, think of Care Bears
whenever I see a rainbow.
X
X
X
X
In fact I think of them when
I see clouds and imagine
them driving round in their
cloud cars. Kat, Essex
When I see a rainbow, I
think of Arthur Kirkland.
Holly, Bolton
Stuart, I don`t think you
and Paul with the decent
body are meant to be. Now
if you`re interested in a
-decent body, I`m your
man. Scotty, West Sussex
Just got back from
Miami where I found a
copy of Metro left by the
pool! Anyone else found a
copy in a far-ung place?
Lewis, London
X
X
X
Ed in North Yorkshire,
you`re not the only one who
reads top tips from Viz.
Batesy, London SE8
I didn`t have to wade
through pages of football
this morning to hnd the
cricket and motor racing.
Thanks, Metro. John, Surrey
A waxwork that actually
looks like its subject?
Congrats, Gwen Stefani,
that`s a hrst.
Paula, Southampton
Why oh why didn`t I say
hello to the gorgeous girl
who smiled at me all the
way home on the Central
line? Gutted. Rich, London
X
X
X
X
P
|o
t
u
r
e
:
A
|a
m
y
Fihes will help
the elephaht
O Regarding the story about
tourists being hned for feeding
elephants in Bangkok (Metro, Fri)
~ how can anyone think bringing
these amazing creatures into a
noisy city is something to be
encouraged? The Asian elephant is
endangered and many people in
Thailand are working tirelessly to
protect them. The reason tourists
as targeted is because it is the most
effective way of discouraging
mahouts from bringing elephants
into the city. Lucie Ellis, via email
www.Marcade.ce.uk
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1urher eyes
Delhi prize
to rouhd oh
goldeh year
A
NDY TURNER expects to
win a medal at the
Commonwealth Games
despite facing a battle to return to
race sharpness in time for Delhi.
The 29-year-old, who was superb
in winning European 110metre
hurdles gold in July, is now one of
England`s biggest names competing
on the track in India after a clutch of
high-profle withdrawals.
Turner, who begins his campaign
on October 6, has travelled with the
team to a holding camp in Doha,
despite increased security concerns
and worries over the state of the
athletes` village in the Indian capital.
He says he is going to the Games to
cap 'the best season` of his life with
a second major title but admits it has
been diffcult to stay sharp since his
European triumph.
'It`s not just the physical side; in
my two races after Barcelona I was
going purely on adrenaline,` he said.
'The Commonwealths are a major
championships and I`m sure I`ll
sharpen up and get that big-
competition feeling back.
'My target was always Barcelona
but I felt I could do the Games as
well. I go there feeling I have a
chance of winning gold.`
Turner believes success in Delhi
will set him up nicely for the world
championships next year and the
London Olympics in 2012.
He considered quitting the sport
after a poor showing at the Beijing
Olympics in 2008 resulted in his
Lottery funding being cut and then
watched fellow Brit William
Sharman fnish fourth in last year`s
world fnal in Berlin.
Turner added: 'I`d got over the
funding issue pretty quickly but the
hardest thing was watching Will get
fourth in Berlin and I wondered if
my time would ever come.
'It`s a wicked time for British
athletics right now. It`s certainly
revitalised interest in the sport in this
country and I felt every one of us
who went to Barcelona could have
come back with a medal.
'Barcelona made me think 'I can
do this now. I feel people are
changing their attitude towards me.
I`ve had the best season of my life.`
European 110m hurdIes king Andy Turner teIIs MATTHEW NA5H he
is ready to round oh a superb year with another goId medaI in lndia
Leaps and bounds: Turner has had a breakthrough season
wHERE THERE'9 A wILL...
Is there rea||y the
rumoured |ntense
r|va|ry there? We cou|d
nd out |n De|h| where
Andy Turner and
W||||am Sharman
(p|ctured| na||y
go head-to-
head |n the
ght for go|d.
flX1uRS ANb fl11lN6S
kY bA1S ANb LLASBS
TWO years after Europe lost their
grip on the trophy to the USA,
Colin Montgomerie leads
Europe's charge for revenge on
home soil as the 38th Ryder Cup
gets under way at Celtic Manor.
All eyes will be on Tiger Woods
to see if the world No.1 can
recapture former glories during
his trip to Wales. However, our
brave Monty has already written
his losing captain's speech. Just
mind games or a terrible omen?
Ryder Cup, Fr/ Io Sun
befeat weu't
Ieave Meuty
seechIess
AFTER a|| the
prob|ems that
have beset the
De|h| Games, can
Ind|a get |tse|f
together and put
on a decent
show? Sunday's
open|ng ceremony shou|d be a
good |nd|cator before Mark
Lew|s-Franc|s (p|ctured| |eads
Eng|and's meda| charge |n the
100metres.
Commonwea|t| Games, f|om S0n
6ames fer a
Iauh threateu
ludiau summer
WlN or lose at Old Trafford this
weekend, the overriding feeling
among Wigan fans, players and
offcials will be one of sadness.
The news their former Great
Britain hooker Terry Newton hung
himself at home on Sunday will
overshadow the Super League
Grand Final - coming just days
after the Warriors made the
Wembley showpiece by sending
Leeds, champions the last three
years, surprisingly crashing out.
SI He/ens v W/gan, SaIurday
1raedy shreuds
the 6raud uaIe
India's problems taking the hiss
DELHl'S latest battle to get the
Commonwealth Games up and
running is against snakes. Harris
Mbulelo, South Africa's High
Commissioner to lndia, said
yesterday a large snake had been
found in a bedroom for one of his
athletes in the village. And there
were also reports last night a
deadly cobra had been discovered
in the tennis centre. Mbulelo
added: 'We have very grave
concerns. lf snakes are found, we
can't ask our teams to stay there.'
Team lndia have not escaped
embarrasment themselves,
however. Boxer Akhil Kumar
revealed how he narrowly escaped
injury when his bed in the athletes'
village collapsed as he sat on it. lt
has also been reported English
athletes have been told not to wear
team kit while out in public due to
security concerns.
Populatioh explosioh is latest row
ENGLISH athletes continued to
arrive in Delhi last night as a
row erupted between the
Commonwealth Games
Federation and the Indian
government.
Federation president Mike
Fennell insists his organisation
never blamed the government
for the slow construction and
missed deadlines which have
plagued the build-up to the
event which starts on Sunday.
And Games chief executive
ofhcer Mike Hooper has been
forced to deny claims he called
the city`s 14 million inhabitants
a 'population hazard`. Delhi`s
chief minister Sheila Dikshit
said it was a 'very unkind and
undiplomatic remark` but
Fennell maintains Hooper has
his 'full support`.
He said: 'I spent
the entire
morning and
early afternoon
in meetings with
Mr Hooper,
during which
time he allegedly
made certain
comments, and I can personally
attest that at no time did he
make any reference at all to the
people of India, let alone
disparaging ones.` Twenty
members of Team England`s
support staff tested conditions
in the athletes` village on
Sunday to ensure they were
suitable for the 48 athletes to
move in. England chef de
mission Craig Hunter said: 'It`s
not perfect but the
accommodation is acceptable.
'The village had the potential to
be hve-star. We`re at about
three-star.` Tennis player
Richard Bloomheld (pictured) is
the latest England star to
withdraw. He has failed to shake
off a back injury. British No.6
Josh Goodall takes his place.
P
|o
t
u
r
e
:
G
e
t
t
y
F
OR seven winless years it looked like Mark
Webber was born unlucky, but fortunes have
certainly turned around for the Australian this
year. Not only did his strategy gamble pay off in
Singapore to hand him third place - the best he could
have hoped for - but Bridgestone`s engineers were
stunned he managed to make it to the end of the race
at all.
Webber`s contact with Lewis Hamilton on lap 36
pitched the McLaren into retirement but it also
forced Webber`s front-right tyre wall inwards. A
further 5mm and it would have defated immediately.
'I have seen that happen a few times for a few laps,
but for more than 25 laps is incredible,` said
Bridgestone director Hirohide Hamashima.
With temperatures of 30 degrees centigrade, 23
corners per lap, narrow concrete walls which leave
no margin for error, and a running time of two hours,
winner Fernando Alonso described the Marina Bay
race as 'probably the toughest of the year`.
But it was well worth it for the Spaniard, whose
meteoric rise up the leaderboard due to two
successive victories puts him just 11 points behind
Webber. After his DNF, Hamilton declared his
LEWlS HAmlLTDN TD WlN THE F3 DRlVERS CHAmPlDNSHlP - A 30 BET RETURNS 80
b8Rlf
Adam Bay-NicheIIs reerts frem the
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AirAsia X has
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to Kuala Lumpur
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and a comfort kit
included. See
www.airasia.com
Lucky
webber
is facing
nervous
run-in
9akon caught out by the 9ingapore sling
THERE were strange goings
on in Singapore, and not just
because we were getting up at
lunchtime. Sakon Yamamoto
was suffering from food
poisoning, we were told by
Hispania, and Christian Klien
hlled in for the Japanese
driver. 'Should I be concerned
about your health old chum,` I
asked him. Sakon howled with
laughter: 'Good one!`
Was Sakon really that ill or
was it, as Diddy once wisely
said, all about the Benjamins,
baby? Christian`s
performance was impressive
but there is speculation Klien`s
'one-off` appearance had
rather more to do with the fact
the team could rely on him
bringing in some much-needed
funds, something that was not
so certain in the case of Sakon.
Karun Chandhok, who also
has his issues with Hispania, is
hustling for a new berth next
year and if I were a betting
man I`d say it will be with
Team Lotus ~ or whatever it`s
called as there is an almighty
row going on between team
boss Tony Fernandes and
Group Lotus, who
manufacture the road cars,
over the rights to the name.
Chandhok is most dehnitely on
the team`s shopping list. I have
been reliably informed Jarno
Trulli will not be retained next
year, and alongside Heikki
Kovalainen, looking down the
list of contenders, there are
three possibilities: Chandhok ~
if he brings money; Vitaly
Petrov ~ if he brings money or
Timo Glock ~ if the team
wants the fastest driver
available more than money. If
Timo leaves Virgin, that would
be a blow for them.
championship chances all but over. But steady on old
chap because you`re only 20 points behind. If
Hamilton can get a couple more wins, and Alonso
and Webber drop one, the Briton will be back on top
of the standings. This title is still wide open.
Eye on the
t|t|e: A|onso
(|eft| re|gned
|n S|ngapore
but Webber
(above| tops
the dr|vers'
stand|ngs by
11 po|nts
P|otures: EPA/Aot|on
lmages
1B
Christian K|ien's position at the
end of the 2006 F1 season
JENSON BUTTON believes
McLaren team-mate Lewis
Hamilton`s desire to regain
the Formula One world title
will ensure he bounces back
in the wake of his recent
double disaster.
It was a despondent Hamilton
who departed Singapore on
Sunday following a second
successive accident. After
running into Felipe Massa`s
Ferrari in Italy a fortnight
ago, this time Hamilton came
off worse in a collision with
Mark Webber. 'You have to
feel for him because that was
a tough way to end a grand
prix,` said Button, who is also
in title contention. 'But he`s a
pretty determined guy, a
former world champion who
is determined to win back the
world championship. But
when the championship is so
tense and there are fve
fghting for it, then this sort of
thing is going to happen, and
it will not be the last time it`s
going to happen either.`
McLaren team principal
Martin Whitmarsh added:
'Lewis was disappointed
because he is a passionate
individual. I told him people
will take cheap shots, but that
he had to look at the facts - he
didn`t make a risky overtaking
move, he didn`t make a
mistake, he was unlucky and
that he now has to focus on
the races ahead. After two
races like he`s had, it is a bit
bruising, but he is a tough
competitor who will bounce
back and be strong at Suzuka.`
Button: Lewis won't
give up title dream
RDRY mClLRDY TDP EURDPEAN RYDER CUP PDlNTS SCDRER - A 30 BET RETURNS 55
00LF RV0ER cu
J|m Furyk's Tour Champ|onsh|p and FedEx Cup w|ns
sees Amer|ca defend the Ryder Cup w|th four of the
wor|d's top ve p|ayers. Furyk, p|ctured |n At|anta, |eft,
before arr|v|ng |n Wa|es w|th w|fe Tab|tha, above, takes
fth spot from Mart|n Kaymer. The top four stay the
same: T|ger Woods, Ph|| M|cke|son, Eng|and's Lee
Westwood and Steve Str|cker (|n descend|ng order|.
I haven't 'xed'
Olazabal: Molihari brothers
will thrive uhder pressure
Marc 0odd
A
S ONE half of the
greatest-ever
partnership to play in
the Ryder Cup, Jose Maria
Olazabal knows a thing or
two about what makes a
good pairing. His partnership
with fellow Spaniard Seve
Ballesteros yielded an
amazing 12 points from 15
matches and he believes
Italian duo Francesco and
Edoardo Molinari can be
Europe`s inspiration at Celtic
Manor this week.
'It`s diffcult to pick
pairings just now, it depends
on the practice days, playing
a couple of rounds and
seeing who is comfortable
with who. But the obvious
pairing is the Molinari
brothers,` said the two-time
Masters champion.
'Edoardo in particular, it
was astonishing. He had
something like eight months
to qualify. Okay, he missed
out and needed a wild card
but the way he delivered in
Gleneagles, knowing he had
to do something really
special, fnishing birdie,
birdie, birdie to win the
tournament, that was quite
an accomplishment.`
And it is that ability to
thrive under pressure which
Olazabal believes can deliver
the Ryder Cup back to
European hands.
'I don`t know if it`s the
strongest European team
ever. At one point we had the
top players in the world in
the team with me, Bernhard
[Langer], Sandy [Lyle], Seve
and Woosie [Ian Woosnam]
but it is true there is more
depth to the team. Even
though we have six rookies
in the team, they have proven
how good they are,
especially this year, under
pressure, and that is a good
sign for Europe.`
However, he expects a
strong challenge from
America, even though top
stars like Tiger Woods and
Phil Mickelson are
struggling to fnd their best
form of late.
'Look at the weekend -
Jim Furyk won the Tour
Championship, played
extremely well, solid, and
played well all year long. He
is the kind of player that
represents the US team.
Solid, steady, with a good
short game. But Tiger and
Phil are not playing at their
best and that is going to be a
question mark.`
With seven caps to his
name and having been vice
captain two years ago,
Olazabal admits it will be a
'little strange` not being
offcially involved this week,
despite being constantly
linked with a role in captain
Colin Montgomerie`s
backroom staff.
However, the 44-year-old
admits the 2012 captaincy
remains his big goal - if he
can recover from his
persistent problems with
rheumatism and tendinitis
and get back on tour.
Jose Ma||a O|azaoa| w||| act as
go|f amoassado| fo| Neso|esso,
t|e o|efe||ed s0oo||e| to t|e 2010
Ryde| C0o
31
Ryder Cup games
O|azaba| p|ayed
in during seven
appearances
between 1987
and 2006,
winning 18, |osing
eight and ha|ving
ve, c|aiming a
tota| of 20.5
points

SEVE BALLESTEROS has been

named the most popu|ar Ryder
Cup go|fer |n the tournament's
h|story by go|f fans |n the Un|ted
K|ngdom. N|ne t|mes a p|ayer
and once a v|ctor|ous capta|n on
Span|sh so||, Ba||esteros earned
32 per cent of the votes ahead
of S|r N|ck Fa|do (25| and th|s
week's capta|n Co||n
Montgomer|e (14|. Ba||esteros
was a|so deemed the best
European Ryder Cup capta|n |n
the event's h|story. The 53-year-
o|d, who |s st||| recover|ng from
the bra|n operat|ons he had after
the d|scovery of a tumour |n
2008, sa|d: 'The Ryder Cup |s
one of the greatest sport|ng
events and w||| a|ways ho|d a
spec|a| p|ace |n my heart.'
Seve the reatest
Ed/Ied by. Marc Dodd
'S|tt|ng on the curb
outs|de the hote| at
1am w|th everyone fu||
re a|arm |n the hote|.
What a shocker.'
Tw|tter-happy Ian Pou|ter |s not
gett|ng h|s Monty memos after
post|ng news of a d|sturbed
n|ght's s|eep - caused by a
fau|ty smoke a|arm - for
European p|ayers at Ce|t|c
Manor. Graeme McDowe|| may
need a rem|nder too after he
tweeted yesterday: 'We have a
team meet|ng at 6, so w||| keep
you posted on the tweet|ng
ban...|et's hope notIIII'
lAN POULTER'S million followers
will have to do without his updates
from Celtic Manor after all 24
players were asked to refrain from
Twittering during the Ryder Cup.
European team captain Colin
Montgomerie cited the recent
controversy involving England
cricketer Kevin Pietersen, who
reacted angrily to being left out of
the one-day and Twenty20 squads
via the popular social networking
tool. Monty said: 'l've just asked
my team not to. Kevin Pietersen's
error changed my view. l don't
know who Tweets or who doesn't
on our team. The captain doesn't
but whoever does has been asked
not to, although it's not a ban.'
Skipper has ne
time fer 1wits
But can semeene
teII euIts...
Furyk's high ve gives
Americans a timely llip
g
P|otures: Reuters/Getty
TlGER WDDDS TDP AmERlCAN RYDER CUP PDlNTS SCDRER - A 30 BET RETURNS 50
\oc B !
Marc 0odd
Shake-up:
Montgomer|e,
|eft, and Pav|n
COLIN MONTGOMERIE last
night claimed he had 'not played
around` with the Celtic Manor
course to give his European team
an advantage in the Ryder Cup this
weekend.
As home captain, Montgomerie
was entitled to set up the course
however he saw ft to suit his play-
ers` strengths or negate those of
their American opponents.
It has been reported the fairways
have been narrowed and rough
grown long to counter the power of
the long hitters on Corey Pavin`s
team, as well as having the greens
run slower than on the PGA Tour.
But, speaking after the arrival of
the Americans in Wales yesterday,
the 47-year-old Scot instead was
adamant he had set the course up to
allow the best team to win, as Eu-
rope attempt to regain the trophy
lost two years ago at Valhalla.
'On this occasion, I haven`t
played around with the golf course
at all,` Montgomerie said. 'This
golf course is set up in a fair man-
ner to allow the best team to win.
'I don`t think it was right to set
the course up in any other way than
to what it`s been designed for. It`s a
great, great golf course and it`s in
super condition.`
Asked if the course was set up as
for a standard European Tour event,
Montgomerie added: 'Hence to our
advantage, if it is a European Tour
set-up. I was hardly going to set up
to a US tour set-up.
'It is a very fair test of golf and
something that our European Tour
players will be used to in the pace
of greens.
'The rough is graded very fairly.
Agood shot will be rewarded and a
bad shot will be penalised and that,
I think, is the game of golf and that
is what it should be. I feel the
course is very fair.` Asked if he was
surprised by Montgomerie`s deci-
sion, US captain Corey Pavin said:
'What he was saying is you set it
up to European Tour standards, and
that`s the advantage that he`s de-
scribing. Colin needs to do what he
thinks is best for the European
team to have the best chance to
win. That`s his job as captain.
'I`mglad it`s set up fairly because
I think that`s the way the matches
are meant to be played, in fairness
and in great sportsmanship.`
'The course |s set as
a very fa|r test of go|f'
colin hails 'best-ever' Woods g
TIGER WOODS was hailed as the
best golfer of all time by European
captain Colin Montgomerie yesterday
after touching down in Wales with his
United States team-mates. And Monty
fears the world No.1, who has
endured a troubled personal life and
poor form this year, could still play a
decisive role in preventing his team
from reclaiming the Ryder Cup. 'I`ve
always said Tiger is the best player in
the world and the best, in my opinion,
that has ever played the game,`
Montgomerie said. 'I am delighted to
see Tiger here. A lot has been written
about Tiger`s performances in the
Ryder Cup, it`s just that it is poorer
than his individual record, which is
extreme.` Montgomerie revealed last
week his team already knows his
plans for Friday`s opening fourballs ~
and the four left out of that session
will play in the afternoon foursomes.
But US captain Corey Pavin was less
forthcoming, saying: 'I have a good
idea of what we`re going to do. The
players have an idea of the direction
I`m going to go, but there`s no reason
for me to discuss it until I write the
pairings down and turn them in.`
In the shades: T|ger Woods arr|ves at Card|ff A|rport P|oture: AFP
ARSENAL TD LDSE 8-E TD PARTlZAN BELGRADE - A 30 BET RETURNS 530
[PARTlZAN BELGRADE V ARSENAL]
6rand FinaIists
unite te heneur
6B star Wewten
RUGBY LEAGUE: Players from
Super League Grand Finalists
Wigan and St Helens have joined
forces to pay tribute to former
Great Britain hooker Terry Newton,
who was found hanged at this
home on Sunday afternoon. Fans
attending Saturday's fnal at Old
Trafford will observe a minute's
silence in memory of the former
Leeds, Wigan, Bradford and
Wakefeld star, who was serving a
two-year doping ban. Wigan
captain Sean O'Loughlin said:
'Terry was a fantastic bloke. He
was a great player but an even
better bloke and it's a sad time for
everyone who knew him.' Saints
vice-captain Paul Wellens, a former
Great Britain team-mate, said: 'To
play against Terry was not only a
real challenge, he was the ultimate
competitor. Everything he did was
100 per cent.'
Butt set te y in
fer IeaI summit
CRICKET: Pak|stan Cr|cket
Board (PCB| cha|rman Ijaz Butt
w||| arr|ve |n London today to
consu|t h|s |ega| adv|sers about
respond|ng to Eng||sh demands
he apo|og|se over a||egat|ons
about match-x|ng, accord|ng to
reports. Eng|and's p|ayers,
through the ECB, have
demanded an apo|ogy from Butt
after he repeated|y c|a|med he
had heard from bookmakers
Eng||sh p|ayers were |nvo|ved |n
x|ng a match. The ECB
threatened |ega| act|on un|ess
Butt apo|og|sed. Meanwh||e,
Yawar Saeed yesterday res|gned
as manager of the Pak|stan
cr|cket team.
Bensen hepes te
pIay fer Baa-Baas
RUGBY UNlON: Wales centre
Gavin Henson is set to return to
rugby - if he makes an early exit
from the BBC's Strictly Come
Dancing show. Henson, 28,
accepted an invitation to play for
the Barbarians against South Africa
at Twickenham on December 4.
The controversial Ospreys back
has not played since March 2009
but will only be able to turn out for
the Baa-Baas if he is not still
involved in the show, which
fnishes just before Christmas.
diest
Trophy boys: Sean O'Lough||n,
|eft, and Pau| We||ens
F00TBALL REMIER LEAuuE
CHELSEA and Arsena| both
seek to put domest|c woes
beh|nd them ton|ght when
they focus on the Champ|ons
League. The B|ues, 1-0 |osers
at Manchester C|ty, are
w|thout suspended D|d|er
Drogba and |njured Frank
Lampard. They are too sk|nny
to back outr|ght at 1/3 aga|nst
Marse|||e but a draw at ha|f-
t|me and a home w|n at the
na| wh|st|e appea|s at 9/2
w|th Ladbrokes, Cora| and
Betfred. Arsena| were
shock|ng |n the|r 3-2 |oss at
home to West Brom but boss
Arsene Wenger |s a master at
ra||y|ng h|s troops after a
shock defeat. The Gunners
are 8/11 w|th Stan James to
w|n at Part|zan Be|grade.

Wolves blow as Cuedioura faces six
mohths out after breakihg his leg
Bad break:
Gued|oura
It is time to
give Heskey
some credit,
says collins
On the r|se: Heskey heads V|||a's w|nner aga|nst Wo|ves P|oture: Getty
JAMES COLLINS has hailed Aston
Villa team-mate Emile Heskey as 'a
players` player` who has not received
the credit he deserves during his
career.
Striker Heskey has often been ma-
ligned by supporters at international
and club level and has taken time to
win over the Villa fans.
But Collins insists his contribution
is always recognised by his team-
mates after making a fying start to
Gerard Houllier`s term as Villa
manager.
Heskey scored once and set up two
goals in the Carling Cup win over
Blackburn and headed a superb
winner in Sunday`s Premier League
triumph over Wolves at Molineux.
'Emile was brilliant at Wolves.
Whenever he`s been called upon to
play, he has always made an impact.
'I thought he was superb and that
goal capped a frst class performance,`
said Collins.
'He gets a lot of stick off fans but
you ask any player who has played
with him what they think.
'They have got nothing but good
things to say about him. Emile is a
players` player. I wouldn`t fancy
playing against him week in, week
out. He`s a real team player, puts his
body on the line for the team. It is
good to see him getting his rewards.`
Collins believes Heskey is beneft-
ing from the deployment of winger
Ashley Young in a more central role.
He added: 'All centre-forwards want
to be scoring goals andAshley playing
in the hole behind Emile is giving
him chances.
'Every time you get the ball to
Ashley, he is making things happen.`
And the Villa defender revealed the
players have quickly adapted to the
ideas brought in by Houllier.
He said: 'It has been good. He has
come in and put his ideas across and
the boys have taken them on board.
'I think the club will settle down.
The new manager has come in and
settled things down straight away.
'Two good results always makes
everyone feel better.`
aul Murphy
Adapt|ng:
Co|||ns
WOLVES midhelder
Adlene Guedioura could
be out until March after
fracturing his tibia in
Sunday`s Premier League
defeat to Aston Villa.
The Algerian sustained
the injury in the closing
stages of the 2-1 loss
following a challenge from
Villa midhelder Steve
Sidwell.
'It`s desperately
disappointing news both
for Adlene and the club,`
said Wolves boss Mick
McCarthy. Guedioura
was stretchered off and
further tests yesterday
revealed the severity of
the break. Wolves expect
him to be out for a
minimum of four months
and a maximum of six.
'It is going to be a lengthy
absence but on the plus
side the consultant has
told us it`s an
uncomplicated fracture,`
Steve Kemp, head of
Wolves` medical
department, added.
'In these situations that`s
as good as it gets. Adlene
will be in a full leg non
weight-bearing cast for
four weeks before
progressing to a partial
weight-bearing cast after
that.`
Guedioura joined Wolves
on a permanent basis in
the summer following a
successful spell on loan
from Charleroi.
This season he started the
Carling Cup victories
against Southend and
Notts County while
coming off the bench in
four of the six Premier
League hxtures.
DDUBLE YDUR mDNEY - BET 5 FDR A 30 FREE BET
JDlN NDWAT BLUESG.CDm
V/|| 8klGH1
M
ANCHESTER City can`t
win the Premier League
league, can they?
They currently sit in fourth place
having beaten Chelsea on Saturday.
City tumbled out of the Carling Cup
last week at West Brom and I felt
that was in keeping with their start to
the season - patchy at best.
Despite their 3-0 win against an
out-of-sorts Liverpool, losing at
Sunderland and drawing at home to
Blackburn convinced me this season
Roberto Mancini`s men would settle
for a top-four fnish.
But after the weekend`s results,
they may set their sights higher.
It`s been a bizarre start to the
season. Chelsea are three points clear
at the top of the league but they also
tumbled out of the Carling Cup to
Newcastle, losing 4-3 at Stamford
Bridge.
Chelsea`s soft start in terms of
fxtures was the computer`s fault, not
theirs, but Manchester City
represented the frst stiff test in
defence of their Premier League
crown and it was City who delivered.
It appears Mancini`s work on the
training ground is paying off.
I have heard days off have been
cancelled and double sessions are
common as he seeks to fnd the
structure and fuency to get the best
out of his stars. He is highly rated
among his peers as a coach and will
not be underestimated by the likes of
Sir Alex Ferguson.
Talking of Ferguson, his Manches-
ter United side have yet to register an
away league win so far this season
and that should concern the manager,
as will their defensive frailties.
They have conceded seven goals in
their past three league games. If titles
are won from the back, United have
a lot of work to do.
For the last few seasons we have
seen Chelsea and United make it a
two-horse race for the crown. But
this season I`m now more hopeful of
a challenge from the blue half of
Manchester.
The romantic in me always says
Arsenal can do it. They have the
quality but you can forget them this
season. They just don`t have the steel
needed to grind results out when
things go against them.
Manchester City are the new
pretenders to the throne. They have
such a talented squad but they still
need time to gel and develop a style
of play which allows Mancini to
rotate his personnel with minimal
disruption.
This season may prove too soon for
City in terms of the title but I expect
them to challenge and serve notice of
their intent to shake up the Premier
League`s established order.
city bankers
can become
genuine title
challengers
'I hear days off at C|ty have been cance||ed
and doub|e tra|n|ng sess|ons are common'
P|oture: Aot|on lmages
Put your sh|rt on
us: Tevez ha||s
h|s w|nner
aga|nst Che|sea
Boatehg ih
cohtehtioh
for visit of
1uvehtus
ROBERTO MANCINI is debating
whether to hand Jerome Boateng
his hrst Manchester City start in
Thursday`s Europa League tie
with Juventus at Eastlands.
Boateng hnally made his debut as
a late substitute in Saturday`s win
over Chelsea after an injury-
plagued start to life at Eastlands.
The 22-year-old 10.4million
signing from Hamburg was due to
make a late return for pre-season
training after starring in
Germany`s run to the World Cup
semi-hnals, but he aggravated a
knee injury in a bizarre collision
with an in-ight meals trolley last
month, condemning him to a
further period of rehabilitation.
But after his short weekend run-
out, Blues boss Mancini is
considering naming the versatile
defender in his XI for the visit of
the Turin giants.
'Maybe Boateng will get a start,`
said the Italian. 'He needs to take
things very softly because I don`t
think he is quite ready yet.`
Meanwhile, City youngster
Dedryck Boyata says he is
prepared to wait for his next
chance, despite his impressive
display on Saturday against the
league leaders. 'I am not in a
hurry,` said Belgian Boyata, 19.
'Around me there are a lot of
experienced players. I need to
recognise that... I am not even
thinking about the number of
appearances I will make.`
Back |n
the frame:
Boateng
spor|
QUlZ
1. In what year d|d Va|enc|a |ast
reach the na| of the
Champ|ons League?
2. Who was the Ryder Cup
capta|n when Amer|ca |ast won
|n Europe, back |n 1993?
3. Who |s the re|gn|ng
Commonwea|th Games
100metres men's champ|on?
Vidic warhs Uhited to cut out errors
NEMANJAVIDIC has
ordered his Manchester
United team-mates to
cut out the defensive
lapses that are blighting
their season.
Defeats for Chelsea and
Arsenal on Saturday
should have been the
start of a perfect
weekend for United, who
would have moved to
within a point of Carlo
Ancelotti`s men if they
had beaten Bolton at the
Reebok Stadium on
Sunday.
Instead, the defensive
blunders which are
proving so difhcult to
eradicate continued to
haunt Sir Alex Ferguson
and his men.
A combination of slack
marking by Jonny Evans
and Patrice Evra moving
away from the post he
was supposed to be
defending allowed Zat
Knight to put Bolton
ahead. Then, after Nani
had scored a brilliant
equaliser, the visitors
allowed Martin Petrov to
cut inside Park Ji-sung
to net a second goal.
Michael Owen equalised
to ensure United gained
a point but they have
still conceded nine goals
in hve Premier League
games.
'It is a big concern that
we are conceding so
many away goals,` Vidic
said. 'We have to stop
doing it. We cannot let it
happen again.`
And the United captain
added: 'Over the last
few years we haven`t
given that many goals
away or even allowed so
many chances.
'Before we have always
looked strong, so this is
not what we are used to.
'We have to play much
better in our away
games.` Back to bas|cs: Nemanja V|d|c
A n s w e r s : 1 . 2 0 0 1 , 2 . T o m W a t s o n ,
3 . A s a f a P o w e | | .
NlCDLAS ANELKA TD SCDRE A HAT-TRlCK - A 30 BET RETURNS E30
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KEY BATTLE9
ARTI2AN V AR5ENAL
LIee v kescieIuy
Brazilian Cleo scored in all six qualifying
ties to fre Partizan to the group stages
for the frst time since 2003. He caused
outrage when he moved from rivals Red
Star in 2009 but the fact he was able to
bridge that divide shows how good he
is. Laurent Koscielny's ability to keep
him quiet could prove crucial.
lIic v wiIshere
Sasa I||c runs the
m|de|d for Part|zan and
w||| hope to |nsp|re h|s
s|de to a much-needed
resu|t after the|r open|ng
defeat by Shakhtar
Donetsk. Jack W||shere
(p|ctured|, 14 years I||c's jun|or at 18,
w||| re||sh another European out|ng.
krstajic v Lhamakh
Partizan captain Mladen Krstajic is
vastly experienced but, at 36, faces a
tough night against Marouane Chamakh,
who will be hoping to add to the three
goals he has scored so far since his
summer move from Bordeaux.
F00TBALL cHAMI0N5 LEAuuE
Tak|ng the stra|n: Fab|ansk|,
enjoys a rest |n tra|n|ng
yesterday, |eft, wh||e Andrey
Arshav|n has a stretch, |nset
P|otures: Aot|on lmages/Getty
wenger has faith
in Fabianski to
handle pressure
Krsta|ic fearihg Arsehe's youhgsters
SKIPPER Mladen
Krstajic admits
Partizan Belgrade are
wary of Arsenal`s crop
of dangerous young
players ahead of
tonight`s Champions
League encounter.
'It is hard to say who
their most dangerous
player is,` he said.
'Arsene Wenger has a
number of good
players around 20
years of age. I don`t
know what line-up they
will put out, but all the
players will be tough
opponents. It is not
only the four or hve
players at the back
who have to defend ~
our whole team will
have to play as one.`
ARSENE WENGER has backed
reserve keeper Lukasz Fabianski
and the rest of his Arsenal side to
rise to the challenge when they
take on Partizan Belgrade in their
Champions League encounter in
Serbia tonight.
The Gunners were left shell-
shocked after their 3-2 home Pre-
mier League defeat to West Brom
on Saturday and now must look to
get their season back on track with
a positive result in one of the most
intimidating atmospheres in Euro-
pean football.
Partizan may have come through
three rounds of qualifying to reach
the group stages, but are in good
form, with fve wins from six to
top their domestic table.
The Gunners boss, though, main-
tains lessons have been learned
from what was an abject display
against the Baggies.
'The disappointment was very
deep, but we can learn from what
has happened to us,` said Wenger.
'We realise that we need to be fo-
cused in every single game, pro-
duce performances in every single
game and that is what I believe we
have learnt from Saturday.
'I believe in the intelligence of
my group of players and I have no
doubt in their talents.
'We will be highly motivated and
will try to redress what was not
right on Saturday.` Manuel Al-
munia - who made a number of
errors - picked up an elbow injury
in that game which opens the door
for Fabianski.
Wenger added: 'As a manager
you can give a chance to a player
who is good enough and I believe
in his [Fabianski] talent.
'He gets another opportunity to
show how good he is. I want him
to show how good he is.
'There is only one way to show
confdence in a player and that is
to put him on the pitch and give
him his chance.`
Although Partizan lost their frst
Group H fxture 1-0 at Shakhtar
Donetsk, Wenger maintains his
team will face a stern test of their
own European credentials tonight.
'I expect Partizan to play a highly
passionate game and to try to catch
us on the break,` he added.
'They have the traditional
strengths of Serbian teams - they
are intelligent, with a good tech-
nique and in the fnal third, if you
give them room, they are always
dangerous.`
Mark curtis
' I want Lukasz to
show everyone how
good a keeper he |s'
mAN UNlTED TD WlN THE CHAmPlDNS LEAGUE - A 30 BET RETURNS 80
wIN TIcKET9 T0
wATcH cHEL9EA
FAcE AR9ENAL
METRO has teamed up with Thomas
Cook Sport, ofhcial travel partner of
Chelsea FC, to offer hve lucky fans the
chance to win a pair of tickets to their
mouth-watering Premier League clash
with London rivals Arsenal at
Stamford Bridge this Sunday. To be in
with a chance of being there to see the
action live, simply tell us which player
has played for both Arsenal and
Chelsea in his career ~ Frank
Lampard, William Gallas or Petr
Cech? Send your answer, name and
phone number to sport@ukmetro.co.
uk by 3pm tomorrow.
One entry per person, usual Metro rules apply, the
Editor`s decision is hnal. Thomas Cook Sport is the
UK`s leading sports tour operator and ofhcial
travel partner of Chelsea FC, offering Match
Breaks to Chelsea fans for the 2010/2011 season
from 89 per person. Where will you be? Secure
your Match Break by visiting www.
thomascooksport.com or call the sales team on
0870 752 0924. You can also follow us on Twitter @
thomascooksport The package does not include
travel to or from the ground or any hospitality at
the ground. Tickets are in the Chelsea end.
F00TBALL cHAMI0N5 LEAuuE
1ehu 1erry v
Audre-ierre 6iuac
Chelsea will hope their
captain, right, is fully
recovered from the
rib injury which has
troubled him in
recent weeks
because he is in for
a bruising night against
Gignac, main picture. Top
scorer in France last term at
Toulouse, Gignac has yet to
open his account since his
15million move. His main
strength is his power and
Terry can expect a physical battle.
8i-match battIes: LheIsea v MarseiIIe
carlo: we have enough
in reserve for Euro test
CHELSEA manager Carlo Ancelotti is
confdent his depleted squad can bounce
back from their frst defeat of the season
with victory over Marseille in tonight`s
Champions League Group F clash at
Stamford Bridge.
A Carlos Tevez goal saw the champi-
ons lose 1-0 at Manchester City on
Saturday, but Arsenal`s shock 3-2 defeat
at home to West Brom, which Ancelotti
described as a 'strange result`, and
Manchester United`s 2-2 draw at Bolton,
meant Chelsea stayed three points ahead
in the Premier League.
And Ancelotti believes his side have
barely been knocked out of their stride.
'I said before Saturday that it would be
very diffcult to be unbeaten during the
season because it is very competitive,`
said the Italian. 'So, we are not so upset
to lose our unbeaten record, but we have
to look forward. It will not be the last
time we lose a game.`
French champions Marseille, though,
will also be buoyed by the absence of in-
jured trio Frank Lampard, Salomon Ka-
lou and Yossi Benayoun, as well as the
suspended Didier Drogba. But Ancelotti
thinks he has enough strength-in-depth
to see off Didier Deschamps` side.
'I think I have a lot of options,` Ance-
lotti added. 'We have to consider [striker]
Daniel Sturridge and [winger] Gael
Kakuta, it is normal to have two or three
injuries, this is not a problem. I don`t ask
my players for a reaction. We have to
play our football and pay attention.
'Marseille play attacking football and
they are quick. My players will know
everything about thembut the main thing
is our own game. If we play at our best,
we can win.`
PAUL GASCOlGNE has yet
to complete negotiations to
become manager at non-
league Garforth Town.
Reports claimed the former
England and Tottenham
midfelder had already been
confrmed as the boss of
the First Division North
League club but talks
remain ongoing with owner
Simon Clifford.
Current boss Steve Nichol,
who took over as Garforth
manager at the start of the
season after Clifford
stepped down to focus on
other aspects of his
business, said: 'l know
Simon wants to help Gazza,
to give him a fresh start.'
STOKE have rece|ved
encourag|ng news about
the tness of R|cardo
Fu||er, who d|s|ocated h|s
r|ght shou|der |n Sunday's
2-1 w|n at Newcast|e.
Manager Tony Pu||s has
revea|ed the Jama|ca
|nternat|ona| suffered no
fracture when he
susta|ned the |njury 14
m|nutes after com|ng on
for Sa||f D|ao. The str|ker
w||| now not face a |engthy
spe|| out. When Fu||er, 30,
d|s|ocated h|s |eft
shou|der at Sunder|and
two seasons ago he was
back w|th|n ten days and
m|ssed one Prem|er
League game.
ZAT KNlGHT believes it is
time the rest of the Premier
League praised Bolton for
their improved form under
Owen Coyle's leadership.
Manchester United twice
had to battle back from
being a goal down to
Wanderers in Sunday's 2-2
at the Reebok Stadium and
Knight said: 'l hope people
start to take Bolton
seriously. We are mixing our
game up quite well and
have managed to do it
against Arsenal, Aston villa
and United. We've proved
we can play football. Now
we must pick up points
against teams we feel are
going to be around us.'
WEST Ham goa|keeper
Robert Green has escaped
Footba|| Assoc|at|on
censure for h|s gesture at
the end of Saturday's 1-0
v|ctory over Tottenham.
Green, who rece|ved much
negat|ve press fo||ow|ng
h|s m|stake |n Eng|and's
Wor|d Cup opener aga|nst
the USA th|s summer,
made the deant act|on
towards the press box
after an |mpress|ve d|sp|ay
for the strugg||ng
Hammers. The FA w|||
wr|te to the 30-year-o|d,
however, to rem|nd h|m of
h|s respons|b|||t|es but no
further act|on w||| be
taken.
Encourag|ng: Fu||er
6reeu escaes
fA uuishmeut
kuiht wauts
8eIteu credit
etters Iaud
a fuIIer beest
6azza deaI is
uet uaIised
Kevin Aitken
FOOTBALL (7.45pm un|ess stated|
Champ|ons League Group F
Chelsea v Marseille ................................................
S|y Soo|ts 2
Sp Moscow v MSK Zilina ............................. (5.30pmj
Group H
Braga v Shakhtar Donetsk .........................................
Partizan Belgrade v Arsenal ...................................
S|y Soo|ts 4
npower Champ|onsh|p
Burnley v Hull .............................................................
Cardiff v Crystal Palace..............................................
Coventry v Doncaster.................................................
Derby v Middlesbrough..............................................
Leeds v Preston..........................................................
Norwich v Leicester....................................................
Nottm Forest v Sheff Utd ...........................................
Portsmouth v Bristol City ...........................................
QPR v Millwall ................................................... (8pmj
Reading v lpswich............................................. (8pmj
Scunthorpe v Barnsley...............................................
Watford v Swansea ....................................................
npower League 1
Bournemouth v Exeter................................................
Brighton v Brentford...................................................
Bristol Rovers v Tranmere ..........................................
Charlton v MK Dons ...................................................
Colchester v Dag & Red.............................................
Hartlepool v Carlisle ...................................................
Leyton Orient v Walsall...............................................
Peterborough v Notts County ....................................
Rochdale v Huddersfeld............................................
Sheff Wed v Oldham...................................................
Swindon v Plymouth...................................................
Yeovil v Southampton.................................................
npower League 2
Cheltenham v Oxford Utd...........................................
Crewe v Macclesfeld .................................................
Gillingham v Southend...............................................
Hereford v Stevenage.................................................
Lincoln City v Burton Albion.......................................
Morecambe v Bury.....................................................
Northampton v Chesterfeld.......................................
Port vale v Shrewsbury ..............................................
Rotherham v Bradford................................................
Stockport v Accrington Stanley..................................
Torquay v Aldershot....................................................
Wycombe v Barnet.....................................................
CRICKET
Second one-day |nternat|ona|: Zimbabwe v
lreland (Hararej
FIXT0RE9
22
Number of games
Marsei||e manager
Didier Deschamps
p|ayed in the
Che|sea mide|d, in
the 1999-2000
season.
MichaeI ssieu v Luche 6euzaIez
Midfeld powerhouse Essien has been ft
and in fne form this season and has
scored three goals in his past four
games. Argentina playmaker Gonzalez
has been hugely infuential since his
15m move from Porto in 2009, leading
Marseille to the French title in his frst
season. lf Essien can help nullify 29-year-
old schemer, Marseille's threat will be
minimal.
Diawara made a
return from injury in
Marseille's weekend
win against
Sochaux and the
centre-back will face
a tough night at the
hands of Anelka. The former
France striker will
relish the challenge
of leading the line
as Didier Drogba
sits out the last of
his two-game
suspension against
his former club.
NiceIas AueIka v SeuIeymaue biawara
P
|o
t
u
r
e
:
A
F
P
RE90LT9
TENNIS
THAILAND OPEN
(Bangkok|
1st rd: Florent Serra (Fraj bt Teymuraz Gabashvili
(Rusj 6-7 (1-7j 6-4, 6-4, Daniel Brands (Gerj bt
lllya Marchenko (Ukrj 6-3, 6-4, (6j Thiemo De
Bakker (Nedj bt Marc Lopez (Spaj 7-5, 6-0, (7j
viktor Troicki (Serj bt Marco Chiudinelli (Swij 6-3,
6-1
MALAYSIAN OPEN
(Kua|a Lumpur|
1st rd: Santiago Giraldo (Colj bt Michal
Przysiezny (Polj 7-6 (10-8j, 6-1, Kevin Anderson
(Rsaj bt Alejandro Falla (Colj 6-1, 3-6, 7-5, (7j
Sergiy Stakhovsky (Ukrj bt Michael Russell (USAj
2-6, 7-6 (7-4j, 6-3

Lampard
setback
for Blues
EUROPE captain
Colin Montgomerie,
left, believes this
week`s Ryder Cup is
so evenly matched it
will be decided by a
single putt during
the hnal day`s
singles ties.
'I think it will come
down to a Sunday
putt,` predicted
Montgomerie ahead
of Friday`s opening
fourballs at Celtic
Manor in Newport,
south Wales.
Montgomerie`s team
are bidding to win
back the trophy they
lost at Valhalla in
2008 while the
Americans,
skippered by Corey
Pavin, are aiming to
win their hrst Cup
on foreign soil since
their 1993 triumph
at The Belfry. 'It`s
going to come down
to who makes the
putts,` said Pavin
after the US team
landed in Cardiff.
0ne
putt to
win it,
claims
Monty
g
All the latest Ryder
cup news g50-51
P|oture: AFP/Getty
FRANK LAMPARD will
miss Chelsea`s Champions
League clash with Mar-
seille tonight and Eng-
land`s next Euro 2012
qualifer as he is still to re-
cover from the groin oper-
ation he underwent at the
end of August.
Blues boss Carlo Ance-
lotti ruled Lampard out of
England`s game with Mon-
tenegro on October 12 af-
ter insisting the midfelder
needs more time to fully
regain his ftness.
The 32-year-old has been
absent for a month but An-
celotti maintained he
would not be in contention
for a return until after the
international break. 'Frank
cannot play,` said the
Chelsea boss.
'We need to have more
time than we expected for
his rest. He will be ready
for the next game after the
international break.`
Despite Saturday`s 1-0
Premier League defeat at
Manchester City, fellow
Blues midfelder John Obi
Mikel insists the club are
coping without the talis-
manic Lampard.
'Frank is an important
player for this team, we all
know that,` said Mikel.
'It is a massive loss for
the team but we are coping
well without him. We have
lost one game without him.
We have also scored a lot
of goals but we can`t wait
to have him back.`
Wayne Rooney, mean-
while, has been ruled out
of Manchester United`s
Champions League trip to
Valencia tomorrow.
The England striker, be-
set by media allegations
about his private life and
yet to score fromopen play
this season, is troubled by
an ankle injury, which
forced his early exit from
Sunday`s 2-2 league draw
at Bolton.
And Rooney won't
make Valencia trip
g
Kevin Aitken
Ancelotti: chelsea still have plenty in reserveg 55
Associated Newspapers Ltd, 2010. Metro The mark METRO is a registered trade mark of Associated Newspapers Ltd.
Wenger is convinced Lukasz
will be just Fab for uunners
g54

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