TRENDS SUBSTITUTING MARRIAGE

By Noel DCosta

INTRODUCTION
In recent years, there have been various trends substituting marriage. These trends are in fact not new. They were there long before, but behind the curtains. With the advent of media and the rise of various rights movements, these trends, which were uncommon, are now becoming more common. The postmodern ideas are slowly percolating the fabric of the Indian society specially the Goan community. The imitation of the western culture due to tourism or the movement of the people outside the country for greener pastures has affected the way of looking at marriage. The various movies, serials and role models that bombard the minds of the people with these new trends have made the people to somehow internalize these new concepts of marriage. Whether these trends are problem or possibilities is a study matter for psychologist or social scientist. However, the church rejects it straightaway. I shall state some of these trends and then give the church view.

COHABITATION
Cohabitation means a couple lives together and has sexual relationship without marrying. Usually, it is not an outcome of deliberate decision but the couples gradually drift into the relationship. There may be different reasons for them to do so. For some it may be financial reasons or fear of breaking relationship, whereas, for others it may be because the partners cannot legally marry. The Hindi movie Salam Namaste has made this concept palatable to the Indian audience.

SINGLE PARENTHOOD
Single parenthood means a person prefers to be alone and do what he/she wants rather than marry and be bound by its pulls and pressure. It is often a response to the perceived negative qualities of marriage or inability to come to a decision by the person. The recent adoption of a child by an unmarried Bollywood actress has brought this concept to limelight.

HOMOSEXUAL UNION
Homosexual union means a person intending to be together forever with another person of the same sex. It is the union between man and man or woman and woman. In some countries their union is legalized. They even have a right to adopt and raise children. In some sects of Christianity, their union is solemnized just like any other heterosexual marriage.

CHURCH TEACHINGS
The church considers marriage as an enduring and exclusive covenant of love between man and a woman. It has been established by the creator and qualified by his laws (Gaudium et Spes 48). Since marriage by its own nature and meaning is sacred, the divine authority of the Church, which alone possesses authority in sacred things, should regulate it (Arcanum Divinae Sapientiae 10). Pope John Paul II had said, It is the divine law

proclaimed by Christ that gives rise to the Christian ideal of monogamous marriage, which in turn is the basis for the Christian family (Address to bishops of Kenya, on 7th May 1980). Cohabitation is seen as a perversion of marriage. A person considers the other person as a trial vehicle, which needs to be tested to find out whether it has the required functions before one buys it. The Church does not subscribe to this impersonal attitude. A joint declaration on certain questions concerning sexual ethics by the congregation of the doctrine of faith clearly expresses that sexual intercourse must be within the framework of marriage. John Paul II insisted upon that sexual intercourse is a moral and human good only within marriage outside marriage it is wrong. One should be able to distinguish between single parenthood and virginity or celibacy. Virginity or celibacy for Gods kingdom does not contradict the dignity of marriage but confirms it. They are two ways of expressing and living the one mystery of the covenant of God with his people. (Familiaris Consortio 16) With regard to homosexual union, the church does not approve individual homosexual actions, which are described as deprived of their essential and indispensable finality as being intrinsically disordered (letter to the bishops of the Catholic Church on pastoral care of homosexual persons, congregation for the doctrine of faith, Oct. 1, 1986). It goes against the loving and life-giving union of men and women in the sacrament of marriage (No. 7). Therefore homosexual couple acts immorally. Pope John Paul II in his address to the Sacred Roman Rota on October 25, 1960 reflects on the beauty of the Christian teaching on the essence of matrimony, which calls for a continuous and persuasive instruction of the faithful that will reach all levels of society (No. 8). He urges the pastors to avail the use of modern techniques to make the instruction more effective and attractive, so that, it is clear to the consciousness of parents and of youngsters (No. 8.12). Gaudium et Spes considers it as the duty for all to foster marriage and family (G.S. 52).

CONCLUSION
Trends without ethical and moral basis are dangerous. They are a threat to the basic functioning of the society. The miniscule section of the society, which promotes it are individualistic and are more concerned about their own self. The postmodern ideal of relativism has also affected their thinking. Pope John Paul II in Familiaris Consortio calls all the faithful to evangelize the new culture, as the modern culture must be led to a more profoundly restored covenant with divine wisdom (F.C. 8).